22
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There are two types of airport people : Some travelers love being late [2019]
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- Title
- There Are Two Types of Airport People
- Authors
- Amanda Mull
- Published
- May 29 2019
- Word count
- 1276 words
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Perhaps lateness is not "simply" a "moral failing", but a manifestation of a sort of anxiety and a mal-adaptive coping mechanism.
As a traveler, especially air travel, I'm a very early arrival, because I don't experience travel anxiety. I LOVE it when things go wrong during (solo) travel. The more delays and mishaps the better, in fact.
But I can understand the almost compulsive near-self-harm level procrastination in order to manage anxiety, when it comes to term papers and assignments. This model would explain a lot.
Are you early or late? Why? Are you late in other areas of your life?
I tend to arrive decently early, 2 hours or so before departure, because I don't want to miss my flight.
These days I think I'm turning it around and am just going to leave less time for myself. Because I'm anxious and like self-harm? No, strangely, because these days it seems like the line for security and customs pre-clearance is pretty short, so I show up 2 hours early, breeze through to my gate, and sit there for ages waiting for my flight.
What I do experience anxiety-based procrastination in (or used to), however, is sleeping. I used to dread going to my job, so at bedtime I'd stay awake lying in bed, finding something else to do well past when I should until caving and finally going to bed.
I can tell you the article describes my girlfriend exactly.
Even at gunpoint she won’t pack or even look for her passport until the morning of the flight. And no matter the event, she always leaves herself as LITTLE time as possible to operate in. It consistently leads to rushed packing, clothes thrown all over the floor, etc… it annoys me to death but it’s just how she is.
The article mentions couples who head out separately, what do you think about that idea?
I think that one day if this keeps up, we’ll head out separately because she misses her flight 🙃
My husband is the type of person who likes to arrive hours earlier for flights. I don't get it. We'll get there super early and tired and of course taking a nap at the airport only makes you feel worse. I secretly suspect it's because he enjoys overpaying for airport food.
Maybe look into airport lounges and factor the cost into the trip. I'm a super early airport person and for me it's worth the cost to have somewhere reasonably secluded and quiet for those early hours. The food is "okay" (Air Canada) but what it does is provide a sense of normalcy: more like a coffee shop than being at the airport.
We’ve done it before. Husband loved it and it is better but it’s still much worse than sleeping in a bed.
That's true, it just isn't home
I can see this wait being excruciating for some partners
I’ve not been to too many lounges, but recently stopped by a couple of Delta’s in US airports and they were solid. Definitely a better experience than sitting at the gate.
I'm very firmly in the early camp for flights because I've been in the barely making it camp too many times. I like to pack the day before, barring toiletries, and arrive two hours early at least. Then, I'll sit at the gate, listen to music, and play Gameboy or something. Everyone knows you have a flight, so they leave you alone. Everyone thinks you're being punctual, when really it's just more time to chill, drink an overpriced airport coffee and play Fire Emblem. It's a win-win.
Other areas of life, I enjoy the pressure of needing to finish. I like to write a first draft and then let it sit until the night before. One reread, one edit and submit - no time to waffle over my use of a certain tense, gotta get this submitted!
But, if other people are relying on me, I like to get it done as early as possible. Mainly so if there's an emergency, it's likely not my fault, ya know?
Basically, it's like yard work. I don't want to be there but people leave me alone while I'm doing it.
I am very stressed on my flight out of town and I've flown quite a lot. But of all the airports I've been to, I live near the worst (DIA). The airport is 1.5 hours away, if I'm parking expect to spend 15-20 minutes on a parking shuttle, security could take 5-30 minutes, I've seen bag check take 30 minutes. You can't reach any terminal from security without walk 15 minutes + 10-15 minute tram ride. So I aim to be 2-3 hours early, meaning I'm leaving my house 4 hours before my flight.
Fortunately we have family that lives 15 minutes from the airport. This means travel includes: finding a dog sitter, leaving my house the day before (Have to pay an extra night of boarding but save on parking), and getting as early a flight as possible to avoid the rush.
On the way home I am much less stressed. I still aim to be two hours early, but I've found the logistics of navigating other airports is significantly quicker than DIA.
Else where in life? I like to get a foundation laid as soon as possible on a project. But then I let it sit, poke and prod making incremental progress. I'll finish a day or two early and then let it sit before one final review before I turn in whatever I'm working on.
Edit: I have missed a flight. Got there 1.5 hours early. Got held up in security because they didn't like my (blind) companion's prescription. Got to the gate while they were boarding and they had already given our seats to a standby passenger. Ended up having to pay 5x to book a flight same day and still missed my sister's wedding rehearsal (I was officiating).
I'm assuming you mean Dulles? Dulles International Airport's code is IAD. DIA is Doha International Airport in Qatar.
DEN was formerly known as DIA and is still conventionally referred to as such by long-time Coloradoans.
Having transferred in Doha before, they do make you go through security again so I can see this happening there. But yeah I assume OP meant Dulles.
DIA is the local name for Denver International (DEN).
I hate being early for things. I'd honestly rather be late for most stuff.
Being early for a class at the gym means awkwardly waiting around with people I sorta know while we all make small talk we'd rather not. Being early for the airport means waiting at a gate for 2 hours, then having to move to another gate, and maybe another one in uncomfortable seats with not enough power outlets and loud crowds.
My goal in all of those situations is to arrive precisely on time, especially in fairly well known situations; like airports I know very well. Sometimes I'm a few minutes early, more rarely I'm late or miss my flight, but that happens maybe once every couple of years, and it's a risk I'm willing to put up with.
I think the assessment that being late is somehow "Self harm" is entirely flawed, at least in my case. I've just done the calculus in my head, and I've decided that I'd rather miss one out of fifty of my flights and possibly delay myself 8 hours or so vs spending an collective 100 extra hours waiting in an airport. It's a calculated risk backed up by decades of experience traveling.
That's a very interesting and valuable counterpoint: some people just have a different value proposition of what's more costly to them on a personal level.
How do you deal with the social stigma of being late? For example some would rather miss a class than to walk in late and have everyone stare at them or the potential for the instructor to point it out. Does that kind of thing weight much lighter on you?
Not OP but being late carries no social stigma in my culture. In fact, arriving at social gatherings precisely on time can be an issue sometimes.
I tend to arrive even later than most people, and I also leave later because that means less people to say goodbye to. I'm not very social.
!!! Oh how interesting !!! Which culture are you from, if you don't mind me asking.
I experienced massive culture shock when I moved to Nova Scotia. People just aren't on time, mostly. Contractors will blow off an established date he promised to be here because he went fishing. Or more commonly, just no explanation at all: there's no compulsion to provide an excuse.
It's not like Hong Kongers are very punctual people either...... we'd say stuff like "be there in 10" when we're just leaving the door and will be about 30 late. but at least we will verbally apologize and make a show of being apologetic.
Oh, that's a mystery :P
The relationship with time varies a lot in different cultures. For some, it is more of a suggestion than something you're supposed to follow precisely. That's not much of an issue on social gatherings, but it's terrible for professional environments, contractors, etc. But I certainly like the idea of thinking that human subjective relationship with time is not entirely determined by the clock.
You'd be either delighted or annoyed with some African countries were "I'll be there in a few" can mean either two weeks or half an hour :P
Inshallah, I love working with groups where there's no cultural stigma about lateness despite my punctuality. Yeah, it's maddening when you've got time critical events to have the thought in the back of your head that they may just not show up at all but it's not so bad.
I honestly don't understand how it can be not so bad.
What if I'm getting seafood delivered? Or taking time off to wait for contractor ? Wedding stuff that needs to arrive on time? Restaurants that claim to be open at certain times?
Real quick, just change your entire perception of the world and imagine that the same constraints no longer apply to you. Take time off to wait for that contractor? Tell your boss your waiting for a contractor and they let you go. Tell them the contractor didn't show up and they understand because that's just how things work.
The mere idea of things arriving on time no longer even has the same meaning because on time is when they arrive. On whatever time. You need something quickly? Well, you can always offer something extra for them to ensure they make it. If the restaurant isn't open? Oh well, there's other restaurants... Or home.
Time as a whole concept, at least 'Western' time, is something different. It's not so urgent.
Now, admittedly, there's tons of variations in cultures. Some may put time pressures on certain things but, and it's stupid to say, but you just have to completely up end your entire idea of time and so on.
I think I would like that, if my entire world goes at that pace.
Oh...oh no I don't think I can successfully live somewhere where folks concept of time is that chill . How would I get things done :/
And I guess the answer is , same thing we've always done, Pinkie, try to get to the tasks when one can.
I suppose in environments where weather and daylight and season has a high impact, there's little reason to have life be dictated by the clock and calendar. In my example, my contactor went fishing because the day was great for it, and may not have as good conditions next time, whereas electrical work can be done any time.
It helps to remember that not all aspects of an ancient culture are necessarily compatible with capitalism. A wedding in Angola can last 3 or more days.
This is not necessarily due to a closeness with climate or day or life cycle.
The relationship with time and ritual is determined by traditions that predate capitalist societies, with their obsession with efficiency and productivity. It is not natural to be on time, that is why we need watches, alarms, timers, agendas.
It's not a strict thing or anything, but generally I feel like people in norcal think that if you're early, you're a bit of a tryhard, in a bad way. The "cool" thing is to be fashionably late - late enough to show that whatever you're going to wasn't a big priority in your mind (because you obviously have so much other stuff to do), but not late enough to be a nuisance or miss out.
I think I can get behind not early but not late enough to be a nuisance. Sort of like a window of arrival rather than precise time.
And I definitely don't want house guests to arrive on time, or heaven forbid, early :/
That’s genuinely considered acceptable in Nova Scotia?
It's happened to me multiple times across multiple types of contactors. And that's to say nothing of casual neighbor "this afternoon" or "next week"..... Unless this is specifically local to my micro pocket of NS and or specifically towards "come from away" folks......
Further example. When buying a house, the offer is held open for 3 days for the seller to think about it. Which is crazy pants when someone like me (Vancouverite / Hong Konger) heard about it. You get till midnight was standard, I thought.
Wow, that’s crazy to me. I wouldn’t be able to stand living in a place where you can’t rely on people to keep their word. I understand that different cultures have different attitudes towards punctuality, but if a contractor I had hired just blew off a job to go fishing I think I’d have a stroke.
I know right? I don't think I can ever truly get used to it. My first impression was "how come people can look you in the eye and lie to you with a straight face and then come up to you like nothing happened????"
Culturally, what I found is that the time portion is not part of the promise.
Eg, I was giving away a fairly valuable thing that I need gone ASAP, via Facebook post (everyone here used FB it sucks). Person A said he'll pick it up today. I don't hear from him by the end of "today" so I give the next in line guy the go ahead to come on the second day. End of the second day person A said he's ready and I said it's given away already. He got angry with me.
Eg, a friendly neighbour promised to do me a huge favor at X time. X time came and gone so I assumed it was too much trouble and that's totally fine. I make some arrangements to do it myself and then friendly neighbour comes over, slightly annoyed that I'm no longer waiting for him.
Having sold some shit on FB marketplace, this comment cuts deep. So many entitled dipshits out there.
If you miss a flight through no fault of the airline, don't you have to buy a new plane ticket? I would think the huge price tag of last minute prices would tip the scales in favor of being earlier. At least, it does for me. I always try to be early enough to account for some huge mishaps because I can't afford the hundreds of dollars it will cost to replace my ticket.
It’s been a while since I missed a flight, but every time it’s happened for me I’ve just been able to get on a later flight for free. I don’t know if that policy has changed with most airlines or what.
Back when I flew constantly, I had my timing down really well. I'd often arrive at the gate right before or as the flight was boarding. This was also when pre check was new and "guaranteed" to take 15 minutes or less. I never ended up rushing through the airport out security because of this, I'd be on time.
Since then I've moved further from the airport, now it's pretty much impossible to time traffic like that. I also often travel now with someone who does not have pre check. So we get there early and sit.
I hate sitting in the airport. The seats are uncomfortable, and if you get there early enough there's a pretty good chance your gate is going to change and send you rushing through the airport when you finally realize why you're the only person sitting there. As my hearing has worsened, the announcements have gone from way too loud to me not even sure if there was an announcement. The boarding process infuriates me every time.
yeah, private vacations man. I usually have some kind of travel insurance + traveller's bill of rights + cash on hand to make these sudden bits perfectly smooth. And yeah I guess it's a rare form of escapism for me. I don't get paid 80+ hours a week and sometimes it can feel like there's that kind of demand on my time, and safe, paid for "accidents" are highly welcome.
I don't particularly have this with flying, the range between early, on time, and late, is quite large, but I do have this with other engagements. Thank you for being considerate by applying the charitable approach.
For me personally it's because my brain cannot properly assess the duration of things. It's part of adhd. It's not that I'm completely off or wrong, but I can definitely misjudge how long certain things will take me (like packing my bags) and then incorrectly create a timeframe based on that faulty logic.
It's not just a moral shortcoming, some brains aren't wired that way.
I'm early cause going to the airport brings out a lot of anxiety in me. I attribute it to the fact I travelled a decent amount when I was a kid but my parents were habitually late and we were always running for the plane tryign to catch it before it flew off without us.
I want to be so early that anything goes wrong I know I have plenty of time cause I don't want even more anxiety put on me and it also puts me at ease cause I can tell myself I'm fine and there is plenty of time even if something goes wrong.
Overall I like to be early. I'd rather wait it out and not miss it than be there by the skin of my teeth.
That said I love playing the game of "when is the best time to leave". I have two airports local which my friends and family know well and we usually have the choice between the two. So we get into almost competitive discussions over when to leave to get through bag drop (if relevant), get through security and get to the gate without waiting but without rushing.
Usually we're horribly wrongs, there's too many factors, but it's a fun thing to pretend to optimise.
I like to be early and move quickly. From the moment I step into the airport until I’m seated at my gate my butt will be on fire, and I can’t relax until I’ve boarded and am sitting in my seat awaiting takeoff. This is true even when I arrive at the airport with hours to spare. One never knows what kind of nonsense they’ll encounter, and so I give myself as much slack as reasonably possible to help deal with whatever.
I chalk it up to a handful of close calls and a missed flight in my early twenties. Never want to go through that again.
I'm one of those obnoxious people who insists on arriving at the airport two or more hours before the boarding time. Anything else makes me unbearably anxious about missing the flight. And I've been stuck in security lines, run into traffic jams, had hassles with TSA, been bumped in overbookings, missed connections, and other assorted mayhem often enough.
I'd much rather be sitting around the airport comfortably, working or reading a book, than checking the clock over and over again. Perhaps I catastrophize and over-plan, but flights are not what I procrastinate over. And my home airport only has a few flights a day from the major hubs - if I miss a flight, it may be the next day before I can get home.
I don't think that's obnoxious at all. In the article, the late people have partners who leave home earlier than "they need to".
Oh! I wonder if there's a correlation between being a visible minority and wanting to arrive earlier. I've experienced a few much more thorough checking of bags through security than some of my friends and a big chunk of my early time is to pad for that. Once through security I'm happy to sit somewhere comfy or even take a quick nap.
That's likely. I definitely get the side-eye from TSA in some places since I've got an ethnic name and Semitic features, not to mention that my carry-on bag often contains more than the usual amount of wires and electronics. Even with TSA PreCheck, I'd get pulled out about one time in three. Lately, I receive more of a pass since I have hip replacements and voluntarily go through the millimeter wave scanner, but I never count on making it through unscathed.
When we travel together, my spouse is just as time-conscious as I am, if not more so. It's probably part of what's made us both decent project managers.
Also, we both came from cultures where lateness is treated as inconsiderate and often burdensome to other people. (Ze Germans!) I feel this particularly acutely - my father had OCD badly enough that my family was late everywhere since he had to go through his checklist of anxieties four or five times before leaving the house.
One time I had a little box of coins in my carryon, and the people were very worried. The density of the metal just shows up as a solid mass on the scanner lol
I get priority check through or whatever via an expensive credit card and get treated better these days. 🫥
And yes I always choose the wave wand things or even a pat down as opposed to the nudie scanner. I don't know if that makes them feel safer or not, but good to know it doesn't hurt.
I really don't see the point of waiting in an airport for an hour or so before a flight (it's no better to be in the lounge and work than be at home and work) so I tend to arrive 40 minutes or so before flights for short-haul and an hour for long haul. I have never missed a flight.
I also really don't see the "extreme anxiety" of air travel? Sure, it's not the most relaxing activity, but for me at least I wouldn't say it's stressful (even when someone insists on having a chat and failing to retrieve their luggage instead of just disembarking the aircraft promptly like a normal person).
p.s. I really love LCY (London city airport) because you can arrive 20 minutes before some flights and make it without having to rush.
For me the anxiety isn’t so much in the travel itself (things are generally smooth past boarding), but rather getting to that point without mishap.
Point in case, on a flight a couple weeks ago upon getting to the security checkpoint I was turned away because I had accidentally fumbled my birth date when buying the ticket, making it not match my ID. Had I not factored in the time to get back to the counter, get it fixed, get new boarding passes, and get back to security in the midst of busy morning hours I would’ve been in trouble.
I'm a bit jealous - U.S. airports generally aren't so well-arranged, since intercity distances tend to be much greater here than in Europe. It's typical to have more than a kilometer distance between security and the destination gate, sometimes with conveyor walks and trams, but often not. The problems are similar to what /u/dave1234 mentioned in Australia.
I had to make a long run for a flight connection on my most recent trip. With backpack and shoulder bag, it was more of a fitness test than I enjoy, so I'm going to stick with my early arrival habit.
[Do not fly through Chicago O'Hare if you can possibly avoid it - there are no speed assists and connections are routinely at opposite ends of the airport. The weather is poor, and flights are often delayed. No comfy lounge amenities for ordinary travelers, either. It is one of the worst major city airports in the country.]
One summer I went through O'Hare three different times in under a week. Needless to say, I got my steps in between flights.
They only just got the train between terminals back up and running at O'Hare a few months ago after it was out of service for several years. Shit's insane. I live in the Chicago area and will always opt to fly out of Midway over O'Hare if I can get to where I need to go from Midway.
You can go pretty much anywhere from O'Hare, though, so it's got that going for it.
There's a train??? I've only been stuck with O'Hare as my main hub for a year or so, and must now research this. Thank you!
They call it the Airport Transit System. It's a weird driverless train-like thing. In it runs on pneumatic tires on elevated tracks rather than steel wheels on steel rails.
I've only ever been to Heathrow and it wasn't my favourite. I wonder if LCY has international flights.
Oh I quite agree about the lounge. :/ it's a happy compromise for me between being early and having something normal to do.
LCY has lots of short-haul international flights but no long-haul flights. BA used to run a (32-seat, all business class) flight from LCY to JFK, but they ended this in 2020.
This is probably me, but I don't 100% follow what you mean here? I assume you mean that the lounge makes getting to the airport early less of a chore?
Yeah, the lounge option means I can read and eat and have a drink and sit, or open up the laptop and do some work. Which is much more of my normal way of spending time.
I hate flying. I try to arrive about an hour before a domestic flight so I have a comfortable amount of time to get through security and find my gate.
I also try to keep at least 45 minutes between connecting flights. Here in Australia at least, all of the airlines are awful, and delays are frequent. I've been burned too many times when my flight arrived 15-30 minutes late and left me in a desperate rush to reach the connecting flight before its departure.
In Canada we only get choices between one airline and several smaller ones, and delays are built in and how they make money I bet. 45min connections are cutting it too close. The passenger rights are garbage: the airline can claim it's out of their control and then you get zero compensation. I don't mess around on connections
I don't know how it is in Canada, but in Europe airlines will often make this claim (that circumstances are out of their control) initially, but will drop it after you ask to see proof of this (e.g. flight logs). If you keep pushing it eventually becomes more work for them to not pay you than to just settle.
Hmmm good tip for the next time air Canada messes around with me. I'll let you know.
Reading the title made me feel anxious already 😂 I usually aim to arrive at the airport about 2 hours ahead of the flight, and I do my packing 1-2 days ahead. My partner is the same except for one time we missed a (domestic) flight from NYC because he really had to go get this pizza. He said it was worth it!
Hahaha you're never going to let him live down this pizza (boarding) gate are you? Must have been fantastic pizza