I thought I would share this story as I've been thinking about it ever since coming out as transfem and it always makes me smile.

for every year it's been going on -- which is two... but I digress -- I've helped out at a major trade show to put some iconic industry products on display as mainly fully working examples for people to play around with.

I noticed this lady looking at one of our exhibits and struck up a conversation with her as I had done with countless other people that day. turns out she was working at the company who built that exhibit during its production run in the early eighties! we spoke a lot about her experiences with that company.

after a bit, a few more people from that same company came over and they were all reminiscing about their time working there. it was at this point I realised she was trans because she kept saying to all these old guys "you probably knew me by a different name back then"! they were all really accepting and had no issues, goes to show older people can and do respect trans people!

it really inspired me to meet not only a trans elder but a trans elder working in my industry, who had worked on an exhibit I had set up the day before -- we opened it up later and found her initials on an electrical testing label from 1983! in meeting her it feels like I saw a possible future for myself, which is not something I had properly envisioned before, not on the order of decades at the very least. I like the idea of having a future. it gives me something to strive for. I want to be the lady who goes to trade shows and regales bright-eyed students with tales of a long and fulfilling career in my industry. I want to have stories to tell and I want to be there to tell them. meeting her made all that seem that much more possible.

I hope this makes someone else smile like it does me and I'd love to hear more stories like this if anyone is willing to share!

I am a guy (I don't really feel as being very masculine at all, but also not feminine, and I do feel kinda close to the nonbinary community, but I just don't really care, so I just stick with the default that was assigned to me to make things easy for me), but I don't really like my facial hair at all. Even when I do (what I think is) a pretty smooth shave in the morning it just ends up being ugly again by the evening. I'd much prefer to not have to deal with facial hair at all. So I was wondering if laser facial hair removal might be an option for me. I have dark hair and light skin, which from what I've read should be the combination on which it works the best.

I am a huge overthinker of everything, so I already did quite a bit of research myself, and thought about it for a number of weeks, but as with most things it's not easy to find a conclusive simple answer that it's good or bad. I've seen people say that it works amazing, others that it didn't do much, I've seen a lot of people say that it's not permanent, I've seen people say that it damaged/scarred their skin, I've even seen people say that it made them have more facial hair instead!

So I'd kind of like to hear if the people of Tildes have any experience with it. Did it work well for you? Do you still need to shave your face every day afterwards? Did it cause any issues?

I don't want to rehash US election stuff here, but I wanted to make a space for fears and support, and idk, some community here for us. Don't feel obligated to focus on the US election, but if that's what you're dealing with it's an ok space for those feelings.

I thought this might be a nice thread for folks to share some happy LGBTQ things, more personal things than news but if it impacts you personally, go for it. I was just sitting on the porch wearing my Totally Gay shirt thinking we needed a happy thread.

Share moments of Pride, queer joy, winning against those who would discriminate, whatever strikes you.

Ask almost anything

Last week had a focus on understanding. This week has the same focus but with a different angle.

Use this topic to ask almost any question you want to ask, including those you’re worried might come across poorly if brought up elsewhere.

If you feel equipped to answer a question, answer it!

Importantly: this is a safe space in which you can ask questions free from judgment. The vibe we're going for is a classroom, not a battleground.

Discussions like this can often cause intense emotions, but I want us to be especially vigilant in keeping this topic conflict- and aggression-free (see: Thermostat Rule below). If a fight breaks out in a classroom, learning stops, so conflict is counterproductive to our goals here. Disagreements are fine; disses are not. In all of these threads I have said that we should "be kind; be gracious; listen to others; love lots." Let's put that into practice here.

If you feel that a user is deliberately breaking any of the norms for this topic, do not engage them. It is more productive to simply mark their comment as noise and not respond. In the extremely rare case that you believe someone is actively intending to do harm, please mark their comment as malice.

Ground Rules

• Curiosity Rule: The reason that this is "ask almost anything" instead of "ask literally anything" is that your question has to come from a place of genuine curiosity -- you must honestly want to learn more. This is not a place to ask rhetorical questions to make a point or provocative questions to stir the pot.

• Good Faith Rule: assume all users here are acting in good faith and read their words in the best possible light. This goes for both those asking the questions and those answering as well.

• Thermostat Rule: the thermostat is set for this topic, meaning the heat should not rise. If you find that you might say something that would raise the temperature in the topic, please reword it, step away to cool down for a bit, or ignore the topic entirely.

Guidelines

• Experience Guideline: if a question is directed at people with specific identities/experiences, the bulk of their answers should come with people aligned with those identities/experiences. For example, a question directed at trans people should be primarily (but not necessarily exclusively) answered by trans people. The reason this is a guideline and not a rule is that there are many ways a rule would cut out valuable discourse -- e.g. people who are still questioning their identities; a cis person who wants to talk about the experiences of their trans partner, etc.

• Multiple Answers Guideline: even if a question has already been answered by someone else, it is okay to give another answer if you have more to add or a different perspective to share.

• Volunteer Guideline: if you are open to answering questions about specific topics, instead of making a top-level comment with a question, make a top level comment stating what you're willing to share about (e.g. "I'm happy to answer questions about ace spectrum terminology"). People can then respond to you directly with their questions.

Full Event Guidelines

Everyone is welcome to participate. This includes allies! You do not need to identify as LGBT in order to join in the topics (especially this one!).

I will use "queer" and "LGBT" interchangeably as umbrella terms to refer to all minority sexualities and gender identities. These are intended to be explicitly inclusive.

Be kind; be gracious; listen to others; love lots.

Schedule

I won't reveal everything upfront, but with each post I will give a teaser for what's next:

June 1st: Introductions and Playlist
June 4th: Who is a historical LGBT advocate that you admire?
June 7th: What positive changes have you seen in your lifetime?
June 10th: What's something you wish more people understood?
June 13th: Ask almost anything
June 16th: (teaser: windows and mirrors)
June 19th:
June 22nd:
June 25th:
June 28th:

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