• Activity
  • Votes
  • Comments
  • New
  • All activity
    1. How'd y'all grow up?

      If you care to explicate your personal situation... I'm interested! So, in what circumstances did you grow up and how did that effect you in terms of the person you are now???

      15 votes
    2. No news 'til November

      I'm going on a news fast until after Samhain (that's Hallowe'en for you non-heathens). Still figuring out what, exactly, that means, but basically, I'm minimizing (ideally, eliminating) my...

      I'm going on a news fast until after Samhain (that's Hallowe'en for you non-heathens). Still figuring out what, exactly, that means, but basically, I'm minimizing (ideally, eliminating) my exposure to ... hmmm ... I guess "unnecessary stress and anxiety" is the best summary.

      Turned off my Feedly (ahem) feed. No more Mastodon, etc. I'll still be visiting Tildes, but less ... and I just finished tuning out the news from my postings list (unsubscribed from ~enviro, ~finance, ~health, ~lgbt, and of course, ~news ... added a bunch of tag filters — covid, Trump, politics, the FAANG corps, etc). That seems to have killed 95% of the stress-inducing headlines. Will add more tag filters, as they prove necessary.

      Thoughts? Anyone already try this? Anyone wanna join me?

      PS: I have no idea how to tag this post. Tildes ModGods, please have at it, but try not to add any tags that'll inadvertently hide my own post from me. Danke, y gracias.

      22 votes
    3. Surviving the winter

      When I was a child I never seemed to mind the winter, but in the past two or three years it's become exponentially harder for me to live through the cold and dark. I'm dreading the next few...

      When I was a child I never seemed to mind the winter, but in the past two or three years it's become exponentially harder for me to live through the cold and dark. I'm dreading the next few months.

      The lockdowns in March and April were pretty agonizing because I had too many responsibilities but suddenly none of the support systems I had built up in my friend groups. I got through that because it was slowly getting warmer and I could just go on a walk if I needed space. But it's started snowing this week and I don't know how well I'm going to manage for the rest of the season, with it getting dark at 4 PM and seeing so few people. I get caught up in my own head in these destructive patterns of anxiety about past friendships and relationships and obligations that are very hard to escape from around this time of year. I have a lot of hobbies but I can't do most of them right now, so I kind of just end of staring at the wall or my phone for half the day, feeling bad that I screwed up a relationship or said something weird 6 months ago or whatever. On repeat for every day. I have some friends in the area who I like a lot, but I'm a little scared to leave my house from what I hear about the virus on the internet. I've been trying to do phone calls sometimes but they kinda just burn me out and make me feel worse.

      I'm wondering if anyone else has a recurring problem with the winter like I do. I'm not sure if this is a normal thing and I'm just naive and haven't figured it out, or if most people are automatically as happy in the winter as they are in the summer. I've brought this up sometimes with people irl and they say "haha yeah I have seasonal depression too," but they mostly seem to just not like the cold (?), it's not the issue of banal-yet-existential dread and torturous self-probing that I can't avoid. I have a very sweet cat who will keep me company, and she's a good listener, but she doesn't talk a lot and she's hiding in another dimension half the time anyway. I journal and meditate every night, and that helps a little, but I really mostly rely on being able to go to pretty places to keep myself happy, and it's hard to do that when they're all closed or when it's too cold to be outside for a long time. If people have any thoughts or experiences I would love to read them.

      thank you xoxo

      19 votes
    4. My roommate is becoming an alcoholic and I don’t know what to do

      My roommate is 55 years old and always drank a lot more than he should. Before covid, he arrived from happy hour completely drunk at least once a week and often more. He is very outgoing and...

      My roommate is 55 years old and always drank a lot more than he should. Before covid, he arrived from happy hour completely drunk at least once a week and often more. He is very outgoing and drinking in bars at least had a social aspect that kind of controlled the drug abuse, gave it some context, etc.

      With covid things took a turn to the worse. He is now mostly isolated and drinks almost every day. Everything is an excuse for drinking. Zoom meeting? Drink (during and after). Good news? Drink to celebrate. Bad news? Drink to forget. Bored? Drink! Agitated? Drink!

      I don’t really care about the use of drugs on a moral ground, but the guy is not young and only drinks pure vodka, usually half a bottle on a single night, sometimes much more. He also smokes at least 10 cigarettes a day and his last medical checkup was 15 years ago. To make matters worse, he doesn’t have health insurance.

      Yesterday I hid his vodka and it worked, he gave up on looking for it. But eventually he’ll realize what I’m doing. Talking to him has absolutely no effect. I’m scared by the very real possibility of finding him dead in his room. I literally don’t know what to do.

      17 votes