While I ate breakfast, I watched a YouTube video speaking to how death becomes an inconvenience in D&D 5e as early as 5th level, despite the amount of weight that people generally put behind it in the moment. Here's a relevant transcript.

Well, the obvious answer to this is to ban the spells that take away the permanence of death; that way there's stakes staying all the way through 20th level. The problem with this answer is that D&D isn't balanced around those spells not existing at later levels.

I love Risk of Rain 2 but my biggest problem with that game is being 30 minutes into a run and getting one-shot, dying, and having to start all over. I couldn't imagine having that same feeling after playing FOUR YEARS in a campaign.

I don't necessarily disagree with the first paragraph, but the second one is wild to me for two reasons.

• First, Risk of Rain is a roguelike whose entire game loop is "do stuff, die, unlock/purchase meta progression, do more stuff, die, etc. etc.".
• Second, the idea that you've been playing four years in a 5e game that's presumably weekly and somehow haven't hit 20th level. For context, 5e wants you hitting 20th level after 36-52 typical 4-hour sessions.

This kind of sentiment really does highlight how distant the way I ran the game those eight years I spent with 5e and how the game wants to be run is to the way people appear to be running the game, and I'm not sure I'll ever be able to square that circle. Not to imply any kind of superiority to it, it just continues to be extremely weird/interesting to me how the culture surrounding D&D is so different from the expectations laid out by the very rules text people don't read.

I was recently thinking of a new way to describe to my spouse (and to myself) how my mind works when it comes to performing tasks. This is a regularly occuring conversation, as her needs and mine often run counter to each other and leave us both frustrated. I have trouble understanding even my own reactions to things, let alone hers, so I try to explain them in new terms occasionally to see if it makes things click.

Anyway, I came up with one that I found apt and kinda fun, if maybe a bit sad in places: a DnD 5e character sheet. For the purposes of this exercise, the sheet is for a sorcerer, not a wizard (learning new tasks happens slowly, almost at random) and the Frustration mechanic is effectively identical to Exhaustion in the PHB.

Here it is. I'm curious if any of you have thoughts on this or find it feeling familiar.

Spell list:

Cantrips:

Relax
Read
Eat
Get ready for bed ¹

1st level:

Choose to go to bed ²
Get ready to leave
Choose a meal
Prepare a meal
Work on dishes
Take out trash
Do laundry
Other chores
Do a favor (unasked)*

2nd level:

Do a favor (asked)*
Stifle frustration ³

3rd level:

Do a big favor (asked)*
Dismiss frustration ⁴

Feat - People Pleaser: When casting "Do a favor (unasked)", roll a d20. On a 15 or higher, cast as a cantrip instead. When casting "Do a favor (asked)", roll a d20. On a 5 or lower, add 1 level of frustration. When casting "Do a big favor (asked)", roll a d20. On a 10 or lower, add 1 level of frustration.

Feat - Desperate Times Call for Desperate Measures: Regenerate 1 spell slot of any level. Add 1 level of frustration.

Feat - Self Soothe: whenever casting a cantrip, roll a d20. On a 19 or 20, remove 1 level of frustration.

Curse - Temper: whenever casting a spell of 1st level or higher, roll a d20 with advantage. On a 2 or lower, add a level of frustration.

Curse - Social Anxiety: when interacting with another character, roll a d20. On a 5 or lower, burn 1 spell slot or add 1 level of frustration.

¹ Must be cast on the turn following casting "Choose to go to bed." Otherwise, this becomes a 1st level spell.

² After casting this spell, any spell other than a cantrip must be cast one level higher than usual (e.g., 1st level spells can only be cast using 2nd level spell slots).

³ Temporarily remove 1 level of frustration. It returns after d20X10 minutes.

⁴ Permanently remove 1 level of frustration.

I’m starting a new 5e campaign with some friends, and I think I have some performance anxiety. I’m not the most creative person, and the last thing I want to do is kill the fun. The only other time I've played a ttrpg was years ago in high school.

I’m curious what you all have found detracts from a session as well as any advice that enhances the experience for everyone.