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  • Showing only topics with the tag "ask.survey". Back to normal view
    1. What personal goals are you working towards?

      Inspired by similar topics such as "what are you reading" and "what creative project are you working on", and being obsessed with structured self-development, I thought I'd start this. As the...

      Inspired by similar topics such as "what are you reading" and "what creative project are you working on", and being obsessed with structured self-development, I thought I'd start this.
      As the title says. Share what your goal is, why you want to achieve it and how you will go about it (the steps/behaviors). You can include a timeline/target date which hopefully will instill a sense of accountability and increase motivation.
      I'm also hoping to get some inspiration and/or tips for my own life goals.

      If this gains interest I might post this once a quarter for follow-ups and new goals.

      I'll share mine in a comment below.

      25 votes
    2. For those getting ready to go back to school: how do you feel about it?

      The question is open to anyone attending any level of school in any capacity. How are you feeling? What are you excited about? What are you nervous about? What are your goals? What are you hoping...

      The question is open to anyone attending any level of school in any capacity.

      How are you feeling?
      What are you excited about?
      What are you nervous about?
      What are your goals?
      What are you hoping to get out of your education?

      14 votes
    3. What are some lifehacks you would recommend?

      Given the ambiguity of the term "lifehack", feel free to contribute anything that you feel fits the label. It can be a specific technique, a novel way of using an item, or even a mindset. It can...

      Given the ambiguity of the term "lifehack", feel free to contribute anything that you feel fits the label. It can be a specific technique, a novel way of using an item, or even a mindset. It can be a little-known product or a recommendation--whatever you deem fit, as long as it improves quality of life, productivity, or satisfaction.

      26 votes
    4. What are your long term savings goals? Are you saving towards a purchase of anything in particular?

      For me, saving money has been pretty tough but my goal is to maintain a minimum of 4 months pay in the bank in case of hard times. My fiance started her MBA and we have been fortunate that we can...

      For me, saving money has been pretty tough but my goal is to maintain a minimum of 4 months pay in the bank in case of hard times. My fiance started her MBA and we have been fortunate that we can pay for it outright instead of adding on top of our loans. In the past year I have gotten a bit into churning and using the rewards to help partially pay for vacations throughout the year which has helped a bunch.

      I'm interested to read about any goals we are working towards and also talk about different savings strategies!

      14 votes
    5. Living off grid? Can you share your living situation?

      I've written about my living situation previously but am curious as to whether there are any other tilderinos living off grid. What sort of accommodation do you live in? What do you do for a...

      I've written about my living situation previously but am curious as to whether there are any other tilderinos living off grid. What sort of accommodation do you live in? What do you do for a living (if anything)? Are you self sufficient to done extent? How do you use technology to improve your lifestyle?

      17 votes
    6. What advice or wisdom would you give to someone 10 years younger than you?

      It can be specific or broad, and it can be aimed at a particular type of person based on your experiences (e.g. people in my city, people with fibromyalgia, etc.) or just people at large. Also,...

      It can be specific or broad, and it can be aimed at a particular type of person based on your experiences (e.g. people in my city, people with fibromyalgia, etc.) or just people at large.

      Also, given that age is a very identifying piece of information, feel free to give a range if you're not comfortable sharing your exact age (e.g. "I'm in my 40s" rather than "I'm 42").

      • What advice or wisdom would you give to someone 10 years younger than you?
      • What would you have wanted to know 10 years ago that someone older could have shared with you?
      • If you'd heard the kind of advice you're giving, would you have listened to it 10 years ago?
      29 votes
    7. How much money would you need to live the life that you want to live?

      Consider the life you want to live, from the essentials to the luxuries. House, car, food, tech, kids, etc. Furthermore, consider where you want to live. Rural France? Downtown Tokyo? For the...

      Consider the life you want to live, from the essentials to the luxuries. House, car, food, tech, kids, etc. Furthermore, consider where you want to live. Rural France? Downtown Tokyo?

      For the purposes of the question I don't want you to think of the life of your wildest dreams (e.g. private jet, personal island, etc.), but I don't want you to think bare minimum either. Focus instead on "comfortable and fulfilling" according entirely to your own standards--a life that lets you live well and follow your aspirations with a sense of financial safety. Do not feel obligated to give a low, reasonable answer if your aspirations are higher, and don't feel obligated to shoot high if you're fine with a lower-cost lifestyle. Set your number entirely based around the desired archetypal life you want, rather than what you think is necessarily achievable based on your current financial situation.

      Furthermore, don't anchor your hypothetical income to real-world standards. If you want to, for example, teach kindergarteners for a living and live in downtown San Francisco, and your desired income is $200,000 USD a year, that's perfectly fine for the purposes of this discussion despite the fact that you would be hard pressed to find a school there in real life that pays that much. I'm much more interested in the hypotheticals of the costs in your life rather than the feasibility of the income. Think of this less as a real-world budget and more of a thought experiment/personal reflection.

      With all that in mind:

      • What are the details of the life you want to live?
      • Where do you want to live it?
      • How much money would you need each year to make that feasible for you, and why?

      I'm not interested in anything exact--just a ballpark estimate. And you don't need to give a full budget or anything. This should loose napkin math at best.

      Also, to make things easier for everyone:

      • Give your money as an amount per year.
      • Give the currency you're using.
      • Use combined income if your desired life involves multiple people.
      • Do not judge someone else's desired life nor income.

      Also, please specify which currency you are reporting in so that people can convert it to their local currency if needed to get a better sense of it.

      15 votes
    8. What is a scam that people should know about?

      There are, sadly, far too many people and companies out there more than willing to take advantage of people. Fortunately, awareness is usually a good defense. What are some scams that we should...

      There are, sadly, far too many people and companies out there more than willing to take advantage of people. Fortunately, awareness is usually a good defense. What are some scams that we should all know about so that we don't fall for them?

      38 votes
    9. What do you think of the minimalist attitude popularized by people like Marie Kondo? Have you tried to incorporate any parts of that outlook into your life, and if so, how has that gone?

      I read the graphic novel version of her book ("The Life-Changing Manga of Tidying Up"), and it was cute and pleasant. The whole consultation side of her business skeeves me out a bit (MLM vibes?),...

      I read the graphic novel version of her book ("The Life-Changing Manga of Tidying Up"), and it was cute and pleasant. The whole consultation side of her business skeeves me out a bit (MLM vibes?), but corporate nonsense aside, I do like organization and minimalism a lot.

      Anyways, I'm curious what other people's experiences with the general outlook of minimalism, now that it's been some time since the Netflix series blew up. What do you think?

      12 votes
    10. What are you most proud of in your life?

      Someone asked me this recently, and I wasn't sure how to answer. Not because I can't self-identify things I've accomplished, but because it can seem boastful to openly express them. For this...

      Someone asked me this recently, and I wasn't sure how to answer. Not because I can't self-identify things I've accomplished, but because it can seem boastful to openly express them.

      For this thread, I want to remove any and all social restrictions on boasting. Talk yourself up! Be loud and proud! Navel-gazing is not only allowed, but encouraged!

      I chose the title based off how the question was phrased to me, but I'm really interested in what you consider to be your most positive achievements and characteristics. As such, consider the following series of questions as a jumping off point:

      • What are you most proud of in your life?
      • What are your biggest accomplishments/successes in life?
      • What are you good at?
      • What are your unique talents and skills?
      • What makes you individually awesome and stand out from others?
      • What significant hardships have you overcome?
      • How you have you changed your life, others' lives, or the world for the better?
      20 votes
    11. People who work from home: what you do on your breaks?

      Working and studying from home, it's hard not to acquire bad habits. Most of the time I follow the Pomodoro Technique, so I have constant small breaks instead of large ones. But sometimes I just...

      Working and studying from home, it's hard not to acquire bad habits. Most of the time I follow the Pomodoro Technique, so I have constant small breaks instead of large ones. But sometimes I just stay on the computer looking at different things such as Reddit and Tildes, and it doesn't feel very restful. At the same time, if I change the context too much, it's easy to lose track of time (yes, even with apps), and I have trouble refocusing on my work, study etc.

      This may seem like a trivial problem for some, but not for me!

      Summing up: what can I do on my breaks (4 x 5 minutes followed by 1 x 25 minutes) that is both restful and pleasurable, but not excessively engaging?

      15 votes
    12. What's missing from your life?

      A bit of a darker or at least more introspective question than I usually ask, but I think it's a valid one and something worth considering. It's something I've been grappling with recently myself....

      A bit of a darker or at least more introspective question than I usually ask, but I think it's a valid one and something worth considering. It's something I've been grappling with recently myself.

      As you reflect on your life, is there something which makes its absence known? Something you wish you had, but don't? Do you think you'll ever be able to change, fill, fix, or work around it? Do you think it'll change with time or remain permanent? How does the missing whatever-it-is impact your life?

      A final note: given that people are likely going to be sharing some difficult stuff, it's important to remember that empathic listening, particularly online, isn't usually about offering solutions. Questions are often better than answers in conversations of this type.

      45 votes
    13. Tipping thoughts?

      I apologize in advance for the massive flame war which will likely ensue but I'm not sure we have a thread for this yet. General thoughts on tipping? Not US specific, could be about anywhere

      14 votes
    14. How much actual work do you do in a day?

      After watching Office Space for the first time a few weeks ago, I was struck by the scene where Peter is talking about his average working day, and it got me to wondering about how much actual...

      After watching Office Space for the first time a few weeks ago, I was struck by the scene where Peter is talking about his average working day, and it got me to wondering about how much actual work I do at my job. I'm pretty sure that even on a good day, I put in less than 2 hours of actual graft. The rest is just mindless internetting, chatting with my colleagues, and wishing I was elsewhere.
      So I'm curious how much work other people actually do in a day, and how you pass the time when you're not doing anything at all?

      30 votes
    15. Tilderinoes with mental health issues: do you feel like happiness is impossible?

      By “happiness” I don't mean “the place where happy people are happy all the time”, but rather “the absence of persisting suffering”. For some context, I've been suffering from clinical depression...

      By “happiness” I don't mean “the place where happy people are happy all the time”, but rather “the absence of persisting suffering”.

      For some context, I've been suffering from clinical depression for over nine years now. Maybe more. I've been hurt by other people many times in my life, especially in childhood and during school. I have almost never felt connected to another human being, and the older I get, the harder it gets to get any kind of intimacy. I feel like “I'm a creep and I'm a weirdo” regularly, as if my teen angst has never left me. On a good day I will merely be tired, and I think I don't need to describe a bad day.

      Recently I've been discovering interesting approaches to therapy and using awareness to “pull yourself by the boot straps”, but whenever the time comes to actually use them in practice, a very real question: “Why should I do it? Happiness is impossible, I will always be what I am, so why go through additional pain of trying to change anything when the result isn't guaranteed?”.

      So the question is: how do you answer this (loaded) question? How do you get back your faith in better future for yourself when you have so little experience actually being better? Can you actually do that?

      34 votes
    16. In what ways have internet friendships/communities made a positive impact on your life?

      I think many of us are here because of our shared appreciation for community-building, right? So, I figure there's a good chance that you, dearest reader, have a not-so-common perspective with...

      I think many of us are here because of our shared appreciation for community-building, right? So, I figure there's a good chance that you, dearest reader, have a not-so-common perspective with regards to forming bonds over the net. (At least, relative to your average person.)

      I'm a fan of the wholesome, so here's a topic for sharing positive stories about the good the web can do. :)

      25 votes
    17. What is your plan for self-growth in the new year?

      Whether you will start it on January 1st or already doing it, what is it that is going to make you a better person? For me, I decided to limit my two biggest timesinks, namely, Youtube and Reddit....

      Whether you will start it on January 1st or already doing it, what is it that is going to make you a better person?

      For me, I decided to limit my two biggest timesinks, namely, Youtube and Reddit. I started several days ago and won't wisit them at all before I pass all the exams. Before, they were often an excuse for me to spend time basically doing nothing. Time to change that. (And yet, I'm doing the dame thing right now with ~, but oh well, it doesn't have content anyway)

      28 votes
    18. Note-taking, bookmarks, reminders and todos: What do you use to organize your life?

      I find myself on a bit of an unending quest to organize my own thoughts, especially since my work evolved into multiple streams on different projects. I have been looking for a tool to help me...

      I find myself on a bit of an unending quest to organize my own thoughts, especially since my work evolved into multiple streams on different projects.

      I have been looking for a tool to help me organize myself and focus on the things I want to do. More specifically, I keep wanting to improve my ability to remember things: Be able to remember faster, longer, recall more reliably, categorize, filter and export those things, etc.
      Links, reading material, "watch later" material, todo lists, contacts, phone numbers/emails, identities, what I know about people, reminders, highlights, emails to respond to, work logging, etc. The more I think about it, the more I have this need for a tool that essentially acts as a permanent second brain.

      I feel like I've tried everything. Note-taking apps like Keep, orgmode, wikis, journals, disorganized text files, issue trackers, Pocket, gmail itself, calendar reminders, even Magic. Nothing quite works. The issues I most consistently hit are:

      • The method is not good enough at ingesting abstract data. Examples: Anything calendar-bound is not good at storing anything that isn't related to a point in time. Pocket cannot store things that aren't links to web pages.
      • The method is far too cumbersome to be able to braindump into it or too impractical to retrieve data from. Examples: Wikis, Keep and other object-based note-taking systems are unfilterable unless you take a ton of time to attach a lot of metadata to each note. Magic is too asynchronous as you sometimes wait several minutes for responses (and it also gets far too expensive to use at the level I'd like).

      Despite trying everything, I don't know if I want to build that tool myself, because I think it probably already exists somewhere (and it might be down to me not knowing how to use the things that are already out there). Although if someone does feel inspired to build that, hit me up. :)

      My current flow looks like a frankenstein mix of Keep/Gmail/Calendar, which at least integrate with one another, and a ton of proprietary or dissociated methods (including Pocket, Discord, Spreadsheets/Drive, Magic, Kayak, 1Password and a ton of duplicate files and documents). Then it just becomes a matter of remembering what type of information is where, and how to best find it.

      So Tildes, what do you use?

      23 votes
    19. Are/were you addicted to anything?

      Are you or were you ever addicted to alcohol, drugs, food, etc? If you are, how do you manage? Do you want to quit? If you quit, how? What/who helped you? What were your realisations?

      29 votes
    20. What's the worst person you've ever had to deal with for an extended period of time?

      Mine would definitely have to be my sister in law, who I live with. I daily wake up to headaches from her yelling, once a week she threatens to leave with my brothers children for irrational...

      Mine would definitely have to be my sister in law, who I live with. I daily wake up to headaches from her yelling, once a week she threatens to leave with my brothers children for irrational reasons, and she claims to be a "prisoner in the house" when she can literally leave at any time and nobody will care.

      Example: Today I asked my brothers if they wanted me to fire up my hookah. She came out yelling about smoking weed around her kids and then left out front to vent to someone loudly on the phone for half an hour. There was no weed, the hookah was in a different room, and they smoke cigarettes around their kid all the time.

      12 votes
    21. How do you deal with stress?

      Basically the title. Looking online you see stuff like "get sleep!" "eat healthy!" but that's just like general health stuff and yeah unhealthiness is stressful but it doesn't really reduce stress...

      Basically the title. Looking online you see stuff like "get sleep!" "eat healthy!" but that's just like general health stuff and yeah unhealthiness is stressful but it doesn't really reduce stress much.

      So what do you guys do when you want to depressurize and relax a little bit? I haven't ever actually tried it but I hea want to try meditation, just need to set aside a chunk of time for it.

      30 votes
    22. Parents: have your kids been affected by age-inappropriate content?

      I was having a conversation with one of my coworkers who mentioned that her child showed a fascination with scary, Halloween-type stuff starting around age 6. She and her husband had a hard time...

      I was having a conversation with one of my coworkers who mentioned that her child showed a fascination with scary, Halloween-type stuff starting around age 6. She and her husband had a hard time with whether they should let him enjoy it or limit it. They weren't sure whether to let him read scary books or watch spooky stuff on YouTube, particularly because it's the type of content that can very easily be age-inappropriate--especially for a 6 year old. Nevertheless, it was relatively easy for them to keep it to stuff like Jack-o-Lanterns and black cats since he was so young.

      The boy is now older but has retained his interest, and the parents are still struggling with decisions about allowable content, especially because he is starting to age into books and movies that deal with much darker stuff, particularly ideas about death/violence.

      I'm not a parent, but I am a teacher, and I have to admit that I'm uncomfortable with some of the stuff my students are exposed to. Over the years I've heard students as young as twelve discuss horror movies like the Saw series or The Human Centipede. I've had middle school students bring books like Gone Girl and 50 Shades of Gray to class. On one hand, I think kids are resilient, and I think a lot of the more difficult or disturbing stuff doesn't quite land for them because they don't really have a context into which to put it yet. I also believe that fictional media is a mostly safe way for us to explore troubling or disturbing ideas.

      On the other hand, I think the internet has caused our children to grow up a lot faster than they used to, as they are exposed to mature content (whether intentionally or accidentally) from a very early age. When I was growing up the worst I could do was check out a slightly-risqué book from the school library and hope my parents never found it in my backpack. Now kids are watching violent (often real-world) and pornographic content starting as young as elementary school. Nothing can make your heart sink quite like sixth graders talking excitedly over lunch about a video of a real person getting crushed to death.

      What I genuinely don't know is if this has any negative developmental effect. Am I just clutching my pearls here? I'd love to hear some parents talk about how they've handled the decision of what's right for their kids and whether they've had fallout from their kids consuming content that's not appropriate for them.

      26 votes