A few years ago, I got my hands on a bottle of St. Elmo Cocktail Sauce. When I tried it for the first time, it had so much horseradish that for a moment, I thought I was going to die.

Fast-forward three seconds later, and I was eagerly repeating the experience over and over and over again. I could not get enough of it. It was like it was kicking my sinuses in the testicles and slapping my tastebuds in the face. I became addicted.

It changed my life.

The problem with cocktail sauce though, is there's only a few occasions you can reliably snack on it. I want something I can take with me on the go. I want a snack that grabs me by the shoulders and says "WAKE THE FUCK UP, YOU HAVE A LIFE TO LIVE."

I've tried various wasabi peas and smoked wasabi almonds. Horseradish potato chips (or crisps, if you'd rather) and pretzels. Nothing, and I mean NOTHING, provides the puckered face, lose-your-balance experience I'm looking for. The only way I've gotten close is by putting handfuls of dried wasabi peas in my mouth at a time, and that folks, is just not sustainable.

And so, I come to you with my plea: I want pure, concentrated doses of horseradish/wasabi on some sort of crunchy, long-lasting snack vehicle. Yes, I have a problem, and yes I want you to enable me.

Any recommendations?