• Activity
  • Votes
  • Comments
  • New
  • All activity
    1. Stuck In A Ditch In The Middle Of A Desert In A Country I Don't Know The Name Of

      I'm sitting here, not being able to sleep and watching every single John Mayer music video ever made, finding myself a little stuck. I've got good friends, I've got a free environment to do...

      I'm sitting here, not being able to sleep and watching every single John Mayer music video ever made, finding myself a little stuck.

      I've got good friends, I've got a free environment to do whatever I want to do, and I've got enough stuff around me to keep me alive. Somehow, this isn't what I hoped for.

      Ever since I was a kid, I always dreamed of this moment. I'm on my own. I've got my axe, and I'm ready for battle, but, I can't swing this thing, man. I don't have enough motivation, something I've been struggling with since I was born. I'm a chronic procrastinator, even when it's about something I actually want to. I want to sit down, write music, and make people smile. I want to do all these things, but I can't find enough willpower to do it. Maybe it's just my current emotional state holding me back. I miss the connection I used to have with someone that put me at my absolute peak in life.

      It's so unbelievably unfair to me that someone that seemed to help me so much and bring me up can just walk out on me like that with no explanation. She made me a better person when she was around, and a worse person when she's not. I don't understand why I still think about it every single day. I guess this is more of a rant / self help post, but I do pose one question:

      How do I get rid of the constant thought of someone? She's connected to everything I do in life and I really gotta fucking stop. Is there something I'm missing when it comes to getting over someone? Do I chase her? I've tried before, but it ended worse the second time around.

      Anyone have similar experiences? I'm sure there are some sad wrecks out there tonight. Come and share your story about the best person you've ever met that you'll never meet again.

      12 votes
    2. Had to say goodbye to a friend today and it stings so bad :(

      So I'm doing my GED at the moment and I'm in the same couple of classes this gal. It's only 3 months into the semester and we won't be in the same classes next semester anyway. Nevertheless,...

      So I'm doing my GED at the moment and I'm in the same couple of classes this gal. It's only 3 months into the semester and we won't be in the same classes next semester anyway. Nevertheless, despite it only being 3 months we quickly became acquainted and within the last month or so we've become friends. Last week however, her boyfriend broke up with her and today he kicked her out of his apartment - so she's homeless. And in order to not live on the damn street she's going back to Norway (she's only been here in Denmark for a bit over a year) to live with her family until she can find somewhere to live here - she still has another semester to go until she's done with school here, so it need only be temporary.

      She's leaving tonight and so I asked if she wanted to meet after school today. We did and talked for a couple of hours at a cafe - and it was pretty nice despite her situation being total shit. I'm a really empathetic person in general and I feel all sorts of compassion for her. Simultaneously, despite barely even knowing her (today was the first time we actually hung out, come to think of it), I am gonna miss her like crazy... This is mostly about her because of how much it sucks for her and how bad I feel for her, but I can't help but feel like shit too even though I barely even know her! I can't tell if I have a crush on her or if I just like her as a friend, but who cares anyways - she's gone now and I might not see her again...

      Just had to get this off my chest I guess. I just wish so bad that she didn't have to leave - that I could've gotten to know her more and spent more time with her.

      I'm also trying to follow some advice from a psychologist, because I have borderline personality disorder and basically it means I feel feelings a lot more intensely than the average person. I also haven't been a very social person historically speaking so I find it difficult to navigate relationships and situations like this. So the advice I'm trying to follow is particularly this bit: Instead of ‘I love you with the passion of a thousand fiery suns’ it might be nice to do a small gesture. But it's difficult to not write her on messenger and just say something like "I'm gonna miss you :(" - I know it's stupid to do that and she doesn't feel the same way I do because it's only been like 1 month of actual friendship, but it's genuinely how I feel.

      Wasn't sure if this belongs in ~life or here, so I figured I'd just go with this one. Just had to get this off my chest so that maybe I'll not be dumb and write her something that the overly attached girlfriend meme could have written. I used to be super clingy and it's driven people away in the past so yeah. Anyway, thanks for caring if you read this whole post :)

      22 votes
    3. indie rock musician james bay taught me a lot about deception.

      ESKEETIT ESKEETIT ESKEETIT ESKEEEETIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT i like to save this wiine for special occasions because shit's a german specialty that i like to share with people but i only really talk to...

      ESKEETIT

      ESKEETIT

      ESKEETIT

      ESKEEEETIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT

      i like to save this wiine for special occasions because shit's a german specialty that i like to share with people but i only really talk to one other person in this whole fuuuuucking state so i spent it all on me.

      out here wildin rn

      i aint posted a new piece in a week(ish) so im doing two

      but i post "qulaity" so im okay riiiiiight?

      dont @ me if u aint catch tha links

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ytVww5r4Nk0

      https://i.imgur.com/LKIwWHa.png

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2p09lM19FpU this here song issssss

      BIG MOOD

      IMMA PLAY DEPRESSING
      MUSIC TIL YOU
      COME AND
      HOLD ME

      WENT AND BUILT A COFFIN
      BUT I KEEP ON DRILL-
      ING HOLES TO
      BREATHE

      IN HOPES I'LL SEE A PIGEON
      WITH A NOTE THAT YOU
      WROTE ON IT'S
      FEET

      SAYING THAT YOU'RE SORRY
      WE FUCKED UP AND
      YOU'LL COME HOME
      TO ME

      -.

      DOPAMINE
      UNKNOWN TO ME
      BLACK AND WHITE
      A KEATON SCENE

      THERMOS FULL
      OF KEROSENE
      XANNY ON
      DELIVERY

      "DADDY WILL YOU
      CARE FOR ME?"
      I TRIED YOU WERE
      NOT THERE FOR ME

      SAW MY GRANDAD
      BARELY BREATHE AND
      THEN YOU TURNED
      ABANDONED ME

      -.

      SORDID SCENES IN
      SPOILED DREAMS WHEN
      I THINK THAT YOU'VE
      COME ON BACK

      BRAIN AT REST I
      FEEL MY FISTS
      AS THEY POUND HARD
      AGAINST THE BED

      FUCK A LABEL
      DON'T CARE IF
      IT'S ABUSE, I
      WANT IT BACK

      ASKED ME IF
      I'LL MISS YOU
      HOLY FUCK I GUESS
      I GOT IT BAD.

      -.-.-.-.-.-.-.

      FROM WALKIN' HOME
      AND TALKIN' LOADS
      TO NO MORE CALLS
      LIVING ALONE

      TO TEETH AND CLAWS
      AND FRACTURED BONES
      TO TOTALED CARS
      AND BROKEN HOMES

      LET IT GO
      LET IT GO
      DON'T HOLD BACK THE RIVER
      LET IT FLOW

      #DRAINGANG

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgvdbbuMQ_k

      haha i'm really okay

      3 votes
    4. seriously tho stop touching venus fly traps it hurts them.

      post-mortem: holy actual beans dudes this is my most popular post by far! what'd you cats like about it so much? i swear to god my brain and body work in tandom to make sure i never actually do...

      post-mortem: holy actual beans dudes this is my most popular post by far! what'd you cats like about it so much?

      i swear to god my brain and body work in tandom to make sure i never actually do anything productive.

      i came to starbucks exclusively to work on some backend stuff for a project i've got, and i've spent the last hour sipping coffee, watching Joji music videos, and writing this lmao.

      i wish there was something like cocaine that wasn't, well, cocaine, that you could take and then you'd be like "hey maybe i should clean my room. hey it's a nice day out i should take a walk. ya know if i get work done now, i can actually take a break without feeling like lazy trash later on!"

      actually

      that sounds like weed.

      i need to move to a legal state lmao.

      but in order to do that i gotta get better at programming so i can actually get a car (ya fucked up, bishop) and get a new place.

      catch-22's are like so literally my favorite thing (:

      anyway this isn't even the poem lmao i'm just sober ranting at the internet.

      esskeetiiiiiit

      <poem>

      there's this
      black hole lingers
      'round every corner.

      obscure sounds
      dark haze,
      and no borders

      it looms near,
      strikes fear
      when it's closer

      heart runs,
      hands shake,
      i get colder.

      /

      sometimes
      i get close
      take a peek in

      low growl
      sounds loud
      gotta feed it

      audrey
      she's hungry
      when you're bleeding

      jumped in-
      to my blood
      i'm her beacon

      /

      now i can't shake
      this damned desire, god
      i think i gotta call her

      am i safer when she's
      gone? she's in my dreams
      do i still love her?

      my best friend is
      mad, the shit i do
      only appalls her.

      the pit, it's in my
      stomach, god i
      feel it getting stronger.

      /

      audrey

      audrey

      keep the peace, please.

      audrey

      audrey

      play my heart strings.

      you told me to

      obey you baby,

      you control me.

      audrey

      lay me

      to rest in peace

      </poem>

      bishop

      (p.s. i noticed that there always seems to be a vote on my post like the second after i post my poetry shit. whoever you are you're cute af and i love you ok)

      19 votes
    5. jetpack like spy kids

      my head is aching, day four in sobriety. is it the drugs or every- thing that runs about my dreams all the people in my night- mares never let me sleep. my angry father, my old lover, or my...

      my head is aching,
      day four in sobriety.
      is it the drugs or every-
      thing that runs about my dreams
      all the people in my night-
      mares never let me sleep.
      my angry father, my old
      lover, or my mother's screams.

      i go to bed at noon
      and i wake up at three.
      no power left, make some coffee
      just whatever's cheap.
      folgers tastes like cigarettes,
      a cup of apathy.
      wanna sleep inside a noose
      on a dramatic tree.*

      eyes on gucci cus
      they're catching bags
      they're getting dark, like the
      stones came, painted them black
      i wanna move to where the dems are at.
      to the palm trees and the medicine.

      i fantasize about a booked flight,
      goodbyes, and a packed bag.
      fresh check, laptop,
      in my backpack
      new friends, new home,
      and a black lab.
      but that's all in the clouds
      and my drugs are a jetpack.

      but now i'm sober
      and i'm jetlagged.
      and now she's back
      turning my dreams bad
      woke up, aching head,
      and a hurting back.
      dig in my closet
      for a white bag.

      if i'm lucky it's a heart attack.


      • this line isn't mine, wish it was though, i love how self-aware it is when it comes to the hyperdramatic bullshit i always write. would love to write some more stuff in this style.

      oddly enough, it's from a game grumps episode of super mario galaxy lmao

      maybe adding that and fixing the meter in these. i feel like the meter in my sober stuff is really jumpy - i can hear the different parts in my head but i don't think im piecing them together well.

      4 votes
    6. solitude

      idgaf we going two in one day. ban me if my shit's annoying, just give me my posts first. 's all i ask. i know a lot of the shit i write is blunt. i know a lot of it is too straight-forward for...

      idgaf we going two in one day. ban me if my shit's annoying, just give me my posts first. 's all i ask.

      i know a lot of the shit i write is blunt.

      i know a lot of it is too straight-forward for people to be comfortable with.

      i honestly don't care.

      i don't write for them.

      i write for my sanity.

      i want my words to be your drug.

      more drunken poetry.

      god bless those who support. you keep me here. i'm glad you enjoy my works and i hope, at the very least, i help you find catharsis or explore a morbid curiosity into the lives of the damned.

      i am here for you. i am an example.


      from dust we're built,
      and to ash we fall
      wanna get so high, that
      i can't move at all.
      turns out her secret
      was xan all along
      i need some harder shit
      just to push me along

      never thought that love
      was really a drug
      that was just some dumb
      shit they'd say in the songs
      but now it's done, you're
      gone, and i'm having withdrawals
      i'm getting into drugs and
      i'm carving my arms

      and you couldn't give a fuck,
      you never call
      guess all of those years
      didn't matter at all
      all the shit we went through
      can suffer the fall
      so why am i even here,
      or breathing at all.

      had me in a trance, girl
      i was under your spell
      every command, on
      my knees i knelt
      really suicidal, that's the
      hand i was dealt.
      kiss me on my scars, i
      think it's sexy as hell

      the only thing that turns
      me on - facades of real love
      so if you're tryna lure me
      in, give me a real hug.
      pull me close, give a kiss,
      that's the best drugs
      need you to take the
      breath out of my lungs

      fuck. i want to die.

      "i'd still blow my brains out just for you"

      9 votes
    7. I have a friend with a secret.

      hey you, reading the text sample on the homepage. open this. read the whole thing. god i remember why i write when im drunk. i'm back #bishop babyyyyyyyyyy i've got a little friend with an even...

      hey you, reading the text sample on the homepage. open this. read the whole thing.

      god i remember why i write when im drunk. i'm back
      #bishop babyyyyyyyyyy

      i've got a little friend
      with an even smaller secret
      she entrusted it in me
      and i don't know if i can keep it.
      i've got a little friend
      who told me a little secret
      it's the best i've ever heard
      my god i wish i could relive it


      she asked me
      do you trust me?
      as rain poured down on the window

      .

      i replied honey
      would you hurt me?
      'course not, i didn't think so.

      .

      and we laid back
      here it fades black
      a few things i can't tell you.

      .

      you'd be angry
      try to stop me
      don't wanna know what things came to

      .

      but we laid there
      sipping night air
      as the rain fell, room was candlelit

      .

      she felt a little-bittle afraid.
      are you okay?
      i promise you i can handle it.

      .

      she laid back, she said alright
      i hope that you're right
      don't wanna send you scrambling

      .

      then she got close,
      told me a secret
      my god i felt outstanding


      i've got a little friend
      with an even smaller secret
      she entrusted it in me
      and i don't know if i can keep it.
      i've got a little friend
      who told me a little secret
      it's the best i've ever heard
      my god i wish i could relive it

      (oh my god)

      i've got a little friend
      with an even smaller secret
      she trusted me with it, by-
      god i can barely believe it
      i've got a little friend
      with an itty-bitty secret
      god i never knew that
      i would come to need it


      then she made me promise
      that i wouldn't go and spread
      the word about my findings

      .

      said she'd be upset with me
      and told me all these nasty things
      about what she would do to me

      .

      i gotta tan baby with
      a little white secret
      ......can you believe it

      ....
      ....
      ..my god i can't believe it

      .

      .

      WHISPERS IN THE DARK

      WERE NEVER MEANT TO BE A PLAYGROUND

      NOW YOU WENT AND GOT IT BAD

      WENT POKEMON AND WHITED OUT

      YOU GOT A GOOD FRIEND

      SHE GAVE YOU A SECRET

      I'VE NEVER MET SOMEBODY WEAKER

      HOW THE HELL COULDN'T YOU KEEP IT


      i've got a little friend
      with an even smaller secret
      she entrusted it in me
      and i don't know if i can keep it.
      i've got a little friend
      who told me a little secret
      it's the best i've ever heard
      my god i wish i could relive it

      .

      i dont know why i even try to write sober lmao.i cant wait to move to a legal state and just stay crossfaded 24/7.

      imagine the shit i'll come up with.

      making my own music. putting my heart in the lyivs, actually being able to record.

      you lot might actually be able to hear one of these "peoms" put to music

      14 votes
    8. serre-moi /// sehr moi

      cool to see i'm not the only person writing poetry on here anymore. shoutout to @precise and @zoec for sharing their works recently. def looking forward to more in the future. bishop. do you think...

      cool to see i'm not the only person writing poetry on here anymore. shoutout to @precise and @zoec for sharing their works recently. def looking forward to more in the future.

      bishop.


      do you think i'm pretty?
      do you think of me at all?
      i've been laying here and shrinking
      oh my god i'm feeling small
      every bit of stock that i had
      in myself, i auctioned off
      invested it in you, hoping
      you'd return my calls.

      mama i just need a hug
      baby need a little love
      miss how every day you'd tell me
      "baby you look cute as fuck"
      now you're gone i'm feeling rough
      wonder if i'm good enough
      used to be so confident
      now i'm into hella drugs
      every time i look into the mirror
      i start pouring up
      yeah she was your better half
      you're the worse, and quartered up.
      your nose is too big, hair thin
      need a tummy tuck
      need someone to show you love
      warm kisses and tummy rubs

      you were my rock and now i sniff rocks.
      we had a ball, and now i pop bars.
      suicidal thoughts, and crashed cars.
      i'm not good enough for any heart.
      catch a bag, catch a nose job.
      dark eyes, need to nod off.
      5'6 never get tall.
      take my brain with a sawed-off.

      god i wish somebody told me
      that the world was gonna roll me
      up into a piece of paper
      light my ass on fire - smoking.
      laying in the dark and dosing
      tryna keep my eyes from closing
      took you to my favorite cities
      love was in St. Louis, growing.
      boy you're getting kinda fat,
      acne's bad, already know it.
      chipped a tooth back in the crash
      people cannot help but notice
      looking down at my whole world eroded
      can't seem to control it
      guess this is the life i've chosen
      getting high and never coping

      mama i just need a hug
      baby need a little love
      girl what happened to the old
      days of us not giving up
      you gave me euphoria
      fuck, i never needed drugs
      i know we had some hard times
      i guess i didn't love enough
      i know that we would argue, we
      would yell, and i would wanna cry
      but at least i had someone
      to hold and didn't wanna die
      hope you have a better life,
      peacing out for now cus i'm
      gonna take a couple drugs and
      pray to god i die tonight

      6 votes
    9. weary///deplteted.

      hello. so all of my works have been on here thus far. either existing as posts on tildes if it's something new, or on my desktop if it's a piece from earlier in the year. i've not gotten the...

      hello.

      so all of my works have been on here thus far. either existing as posts on tildes if it's something new, or on my desktop if it's a piece from earlier in the year.

      i've not gotten the chance to head into a studio yet, thought i'm curious. would anyone care to hear any of these pieces put to music?

      if so, which one? i imagine myself being on limited funds for the first few months once i get the fuck out of texas - furnishing a new apartment from the ground up is gonna be money, so i'm limited on how much studio time i'll be able to get but it's definitely going to be a priority.

      also - what'd you have for breakfast?

      -bishop


      how can creativity
      be so void of itself
      writing poetry is grabbing
      beats from off the shelf
      finding other words to
      talk about the shit you felt
      and repeating endlessly
      that you want to kill yourself
      you turned into a druggie
      after mommy up and left
      you did the best you could
      and now you're feeling all depressed
      no money, think you're ugly
      and you're wanting to regress
      dreaming of the days you'd
      lay your head upon her chest

      it's the same shit.
      ain't shit changed
      in the last 90 days
      with your lame quips.
      hit the drain switch.
      catch a liquor wave
      write about wanting a grave
      in a krater.
      baby face it -
      your mind is going numb
      because you're never number one
      in your focus.
      but you chose it.
      saw the flags, you were blind.
      joy in second to the grind
      man it's hopeless.

      hope we find some other shit now.
      find some new words to write down.
      otherwise i'm going down.
      otherwise i'm going down.

      crawl into a corner, fade
      into obscurity
      never did i think my love
      would be the death of me
      conflicted, wanting peace,
      but i also want to scream
      wicca bloody sacrifice
      when you show on my screen
      tired of this fucking state
      i really wanna leave
      head out to the west
      spend all my money on some weed
      maybe in stay in Texas
      do some harder shit for free
      they say be yourself but
      even i'm tired of me.

      and i'm solo.
      friends don't understand
      family do what they can
      but they don't know
      i feel so alone.
      try to play it safe
      but the xan's a call away
      i could go numb.
      is it good though?
      maybe shit's laced,
      put me in a better place
      never come home.
      am i done now?
      have i said all i can say?
      will these ever go your way?
      i feel dumb now.

      hope we find some other shit now.
      find some new words to write down.
      otherwise i'm going down.
      otherwise i'm going down.

      doing it again, i keep
      on repeating myself
      telling everyone that every-
      day's like i'm in hell
      never new ideas, why
      am i always compelled
      to write all of these poems
      that are copies of themselves
      is this all cathartic,
      or at all good for my health?
      nowhere else to turn, i
      guess i'm feeling overwhelmed
      maybe i should call it quits
      and keep it to myself
      and pray to god that i
      will not see november twelfth.

      9 votes
    10. teagritty.

      howdy there. had a good day today, landed a new contract! but of course i can't close out the week on a happy post, where's the fun in that? so i put some drugs in my tea and wrote a thing....

      howdy there. had a good day today, landed a new contract! but of course i can't close out the week on a happy post, where's the fun in that?

      so i put some drugs in my tea and wrote a thing.

      jouissez.


      manny couldn't stand in his corner
      for his last fight
      wilbur turned around, downwind
      on his last flight
      osipova sat down, and rolled
      off her tights
      big sigh
      tongue-tied
      tryna get their words right
      don't cry big guy
      i know you'll be alright
      life builds character out
      of all the bad times
      why do my characters
      always end up bad guys
      even james evans is
      falling in some bad times

      had a pet, but she
      left and took it with
      every time he close his eyes,
      her visions dance around his head
      doesn't want to sleep, so
      he's turning to the cigarettes
      kinda hard to cuddle up
      next to a slilhouette
      he craved depth, but
      he had nowhere to lay his head
      so he grabbed a shovel, headed
      out and dug a grave instead
      no more confidence, put
      some holes in his esophagus
      crossed his arms and fell back
      into his own sarcophagus

      blind optimists start
      to make his stomach sick
      you say he'll be fine,
      how are you so sure of it

      (beat.)

      how are you so sure of it

      times are hard, sui-
      cide epidemic
      one heated moment,
      rash decisions
      one year feeling this shit
      i can't live with
      remember when you made
      me liberated

      used to be a loverboy
      now i'm all jaded
      look at myself in the mirror
      and i hate it
      wonder if i'm thought about
      well, or i'm hated
      tryna forget, get
      numb in this krater
      wondering now if
      you were a sadist
      otherwise how could you
      lie to their faces?
      tell em that you'd be
      there when they need it?
      i'm not the only body
      you left bleeding

      he craved depth, but
      he had nowhere to lay his head
      so he grabbed a shovel, headed
      out and dug a grave instead
      no more confidence, put
      some holes in his esophagus
      crossed his arms and fell back
      into his own sarcophagus
      "FUK LUV" blood-etched,
      tatted on his chest
      eyes closed, smile wide, now
      that he can get some rest.
      high hopes that there's
      life in the next.
      what he wouldn't give,
      just to start over again.

      10 votes
    11. Hello

      Hello, I am el fox. Just joined today and kind of lurking trying to figure out where to eventually dive in. What do I need to know about interacting here? And how about that Elon Musk? I think he...

      Hello, I am el fox. Just joined today and kind of lurking trying to figure out where to eventually dive in. What do I need to know about interacting here?

      And how about that Elon Musk? I think he might have just flown a little too close to the Sun. At this point I hope he just steps down and takes a less forward facing role in the company and gets himself together. Really rooting for it to work out. Sad to see someone so far off the rails.

      23 votes
    12. at night the sandman sends me pretty things in unconsenting dreams.

      so i know nobody asks for my shit poetry lmao. i just wanna take a second to thank tildes for being a place for me to get shit off my chest. i wrote a comment on another site earlier today about...

      so i know nobody asks for my shit poetry lmao.

      i just wanna take a second to thank tildes for being a place for me to get shit off my chest.

      i wrote a comment on another site earlier today about catharsis, artistic expression, and depression. and it really made me appreciate the little community we've got going here.

      i have a feeling it's the same 5-6 people who upvote my posts whenever they come through, and i love you six to hell and back.

      i doubt i'd even get that kinda traction anywhere else.

      thank you for the support.

      thank you for letting me vent.

      much love.

      bishop.


      it's 3:11 like
      the band you like
      remember dancing
      under flashing lights
      ripped off your bra
      threw it up high
      heading home, arm in arm
      what a night
      i couldn't see it i
      guess i was blind
      fetish for pain meant
      you loved a fight
      you came the loudest
      when you held the knife
      and drove deep into
      my chest that night.

      you held me close
      and kissed me soft
      sat in your lap
      and gently rocked
      empathic smile and
      a lying tongue
      you made a promise
      that we'd still talk.
      behind your back you
      held a loaded gun
      pulled the trigger took
      off in a run
      into his arms
      into the sun
      things are getting dark
      in our garage.

      dysthymia
      is in my blood
      and i cant end
      it soon enough
      but i just do not
      have the guts
      yet.
      water my tongue
      with shitty rum
      and pray that i
      will find the one
      and she'll still love
      me when i'm drunk
      and
      dysthymia
      i'm getting high
      and i don't really
      wanna die
      it's just i never
      feel alive
      man
      dripping knife
      a sacrifice
      mr. sandman
      please be nice
      i don't wanna
      see her face
      now

      it's 3:11 and
      i'm home alone
      asking questions
      that nobody knows
      should i buy
      some xans
      buy
      some coke
      would i be upset
      if i overdose
      it's been some months
      and still here i am
      hooded sweater, scarred
      arms, kicking cans
      a black sheep,
      a lost lamb
      still in the kiln -
      shell of a man

      dysthymia
      is in my blood
      and i cant end
      it soon enough
      but i just do not
      have the guts
      yet.
      water my tongue
      with shitty rum
      and pray that i
      will find the one
      and she'll still love
      me when i'm drunk
      and
      dysthymia
      i'm getting high
      and i don't really
      wanna die
      it's just i never
      feel alive
      man
      dripping knife
      a sacrifice
      mr. sandman
      please be nice
      i don't wanna
      see her face
      now

      13 votes
    13. sixtysevenhundred.

      on some goth shit meditating in the graveyard tarring up my lungs while i'm walking down the boulevard sad little white boy crying, thinks his life's hard you don't know pain, there's a genocide...

      on some goth shit
      meditating in the graveyard
      tarring up my lungs while
      i'm walking down the boulevard
      sad little white boy
      crying, thinks his life's hard
      you don't know pain,
      there's a genocide in Myanmar
      people get their throats slit
      believing in the "wrong" god
      you had a girl make you high
      and you fell hard
      families are dying
      and you want to be a rockstar
      so why you taking drugs?
      what you trying to get numb for?

      i just want a life that
      might be worth waking up for
      share my music with my
      friends and maybe do an encore
      invite some people over, get
      some liquor that forever pours
      their lessons or their lesions,
      ask them all about their open sores
      sixtysevenhundred people
      either shot or burned alive
      you're dreaming of a good girl
      that you could probably call a wife
      this is how real loss looks
      this is real strife
      you drew a bath of henny
      and you want to take a deep dive

      on some goth shit
      looking out through your red eyes
      shades always on like
      a blanket to hide behind
      bleeding out, wounded
      at the first try at real life
      how does this shit balance,
      do you think you deserve to cry?
      praying for a goddess, "i
      pray you'll come and cleanse me"
      a nation full of people
      down the barrel of a cleansing
      Jekyll and I'm hiding in
      and out of all my draining
      should i even feel like this?
      there's no way it's the same thing.

      10 votes
    14. merely players

      this world is so full of energy constantly amazed by the shit i see in front of me all my wishes all my demons parade in circles surrounding me it's just the vibe that i keep it's just the air...

      this world is so full of energy
      constantly amazed by
      the shit i see in front of me
      all my wishes all my demons
      parade in circles surrounding me
      it's just the vibe that i keep
      it's just the air that i breathe
      i guess it's masochistic tendencies
      i don't want your positivity
      if you have to force it into me
      i let it hit me gracefully
      got nothing against smiling.

      it's great, don't need to say it.
      good day, when the chardonnay hits
      good friends, gonna make your sides split
      good laughs, gonna bust a lung with
      but don't, need to make it seem like
      i don't, have times when i cry
      i don't, wanna force out a vibe
      of hope, when it just don't feel right
      Sono, l'atarassia
      Voi sie-te i Pagliacci
      Why act, like the world is ending
      on days, when you find you're frowning

      this world is so full of sappy shit
      Everyone subsists off
      forced happiness, false positives
      bloody nails digging for
      every causative, we're at odds to live
      with the negative - shit's definitive
      that's why 1 in 5 on anxiety medicine
      sadness the civil sin,
      at all costs repent against
      grin through chagrin it's sheepskin
      insomniac meds for sleeping
      forget that though, my heart's leaping
      I swear to god
      every morning, open eyes
      birds chirping, and i'm in awe
      don't give a nod at my
      curtain facade and try defraud
      ridi, ridi, Pagliaccio,
      e ognun,

      .

      applaudirà


      bishop

      5 votes
    15. the emo rap deep dive - chapter two: dirt

      welcome back, class! i'm actually kinda having fun with this project lmao. dive into the comments and let me know what you lot are thinking! this is the second installation in, what i believe will...

      welcome back, class!

      i'm actually kinda having fun with this project lmao. dive into the comments and let me know what you lot are thinking! this is the second installation in, what i believe will be, a four part series. enjoy!

      in the last chapter, we learned a little about how rap in the 90's began to get a bit more introspective, self-reflective, and focus on some generally harsher, more grating topics. while all eras definitely have their hype music (see: "Nuthin' But a G Thang" x Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg or "Slob on my Knob" x Three 6 Mafia, we slowly began to see songs like "Slippin'" x DMX or "Rock Bottom" x Eminem which slowly began the trend of rappers using their music to really peel back the curtains of their lives, using their music as an escape into catharsis from their daily struggles.

      however, emo rap does seem to have something else happening inside of it. it's not just simply sad or emotionally-charged rap music, that's been around for quite a long time! what's that extra layer that gives us the gritty, rough, and often-whiney nature to modern emo rap? for that, we turn to the name of the genre itself.


      not only did the 90's prove as a time of great growth and evolution in rap, but it saw the expolsion of a new genre of rock music as well. with roots set in the 80's, emo rock first gained major commercial popularity with bands like Green Day and The Offspring quickly moving albums to the tops of the charts with songs like, respectively, "She" and "Self Esteem". as the genre fell face-first into the zeitgeist, we quickly saw a rise of early emo rock groups like Lifetime, Jimmy Eat World, and one of the most influential early emo groups - Texas is the Reason. throughout the decade, the prophecy foretold by the Rolling Stones in their track "Paint it Black" quickly began to unfold. teenagers were wearing black, goth kids slowly started to emerge from the depths of the underworld, and hot topic was finally starting to make money. the foundations and roots of emo have been set, ready and waiting to lead us into the 21st century.


      the year is 2000, and pretty much everything is fucking awesome. we see the launch of the indestructible classic Nokia 3310. we get video games like Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2, The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask, and of course, Pokemon Gold and Silver. the billboard charts are full names that make us go "oh yeah!" like Destiny's Child, Aaliyah, Erykah Badu, Montell Jordan, 3 Doors Down, Backstreet Boys, Creed, Madonna, and the list goes on and on and on.

      the 2000s saw an absolute unit of a revival of the newly restructured emo genre, quickly launching off massively influential tracks like "All the Small Things" x Blink 182, and we even see the creation of the first emo-centric record labels across the late-nineties and early naughts. this means that a lot of the emo bands of the time had not only better representation and access to the innerworkings of the industry, but better access to resources which would help them promote and distribute themselves as well - this is what allowed a lot of bands to leap and bound right into the hot topic t-shirt wall.

      one of the bigger labels we came to see was Vagrant records, moving to quickly sign groups like The Get Up Kids, Hot Rod Circuit, Dashboard Confessional, and Saves the Day. with the internet in their toolbox, some major corporate sponsorships funding the whole gig, and a huge amount of confidence in the future of emo, Vagrant set out on what's considered to be one of the most influential projects in the (still) early days of emo when they launched a nationwide tour with every band in their label in tow.

      shortly thereafter, Jimmy Eat World launches the biggest single of their career "The Middle", Dashboard Confessional break heavy into the mainstream, and Madison Square Garden goes absolutely wild for Saves The Day, Blink-182, Green Day, and Weezer.

      emo is starting to get big, and people are starting to realize that there's money to be made here.


      this brings us now to the mid-ish 2000s. everyone's on myspace, everyone's got a motorola razr, everyone's getting into skating or bmx, and every chick with jetblack black hair or fishnets is going absolutely fucking crazy over Brendon Urie from Panic! At The Disco. this is the part where the big money steps in and major record labels start signing a lot of emo bands left and right. this massive cash injection into the industry saw the rise of a lot of bands which would go on to not only define the industry, but to define the middle school and high school lives of a great number of their listeners. as the emo singularity entered the phase of it's big bang, we saw the rise of a number of stars like Taking Back Sunday, Simple Plan, My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, and many many many deep breath many others.

      fueled by industry investments, teen angst, and a desire to be different, this led to an explosive rise in popularity for the genre, with many songs quickly moving to RIAA gold/platinum status and Billboard chart success like "Misery Business" x Paramore, "Miss Murder" x AFI, or "Check Yes Juliet" x We The Kings. this massive influx of success inspired some of the best parties, most genuine moments, and most cringiest photographs of our many young lives. very frequently this music was used as an escape for those who felt that their problems were going otherwise unrecognized or misunderstood, who felt that they were sad or alone, who hated the seeming lack of control that they had in their own lives - constantly living under the legislature of parents, school systems, or cops that always seemed to hate us edgy confrontational teenagers.

      however, like Sam Smith would come to say, "too much of a good thing won't be good for long." what happens when a star shines too bright? what happens after a supernova?

      things go dark.

      it's now that we begin to enter the part of this whole movement that we've all repressed - and it starts with bracelets.


      sigh.

      it's 2010-ish.

      vuvuzelas are hilarious, "TiK ToK" x Ke$ha is topping charts, and highschools everywhere are full of Silly Bandz and sex bracelets. we've reached a point of absolute pop culture saturation with the emo vogue. while songs of the previous era like "Welcome to the Black Parade" (linked earlier) or "Dirty Little Secret" x The All-American Rejects still hold an anthemic position in the musical zeitgeist, by and large, emo simply was no longer enough. the all-black motif was drab and dark. the music didn't cut deep enough, the lyrics didn't hit hard enough, the vocals weren't powerful enough. we needed something stronger, something more powerful.

      this desire for harder hitting music led to an underground rise of hardcore bands like La Dispute and Pianos Become the Teeth. these bands were very much hitting in the right direction, blending the angst and yearning of modern emo music with the strength of metal instrumentals and vocals hit home with a good number of people still looking to hold onto the last bastions of the emo movement.

      and, as we've seen before, as this demographic loves to live fast and hard, the remodeled emo genre quickly skyrocketed into popularity with bands like Asking Alexandria, Bring Me The Horizon, and A Day to Remember rushing to the forefront of the movement. the rough, gritty nature of the instrumentals paired with the phenomenally screamed vocals seemed to add several more layers of separation between what we were listening to, and the "traditional" music we had been brought up listening to. this was new, this was edgy, but more importantly, this was ours. this was music that we knew the lyrics to, music that we could sing along with because we'd teach ourselves how to scream-sing when we had the house to ourselves, and music that, most importantly, we were pretty damn sure our parents weren't going to get into. they started using myspace, we left for facebook - abandoning the customized purple, black, and sparkly profile pages of yore.

      however, there was something missing here. this was music we could connect to, sure. we were glad to have the songs we did to relate with! even still, we got greedy. connecting to it wasn't enough. we needed music we could fuck to. we needed eyecandy. we needed music that was brutal, strong, and beyond comprehension. we got gluttonous.

      now we begin to enter the scene age. flashy colors and attitudes replace the black nature of the previous era. ostentatiously hardocre and brutal instrumentals (or alternatively, very pop-y, electronically inspired instrumentals) back vocals sang by artists who's image was crafted under nature and umbrella of being unconventionally attractive to this new audience. this led to projects such as "You Aint No Family" x iwrestledabearonce, "Sex Ed Rocks!" x SMOSH & ISETMYFRIENDSONFIRE, and (oh god,) "Bree Bree" x Brokencyde.

      i know my language here is pretty overtly negative, not to make it seem like i hate every band from this era. i actaully like iwrestledabearonce, and a lot of these bands hold a great amount of nostalgia in my life. tracks like "Knives and Pens" x Black Veil Brides were anthemic of this late-stage emo-rock era, checking a good number of the boxes above, and drawing attention to the struggles of people of this era. for example, it can be said that the way emo-rap heavily goes about drawing attention to drug use/abuse is very analogous to the way that a lot of this late-stage emo rock draws attention to self-expression and self-harm.

      this era was loud while it was here, and saw the popularity of a lot of projects like the following before it quickly died out around 2014/2015:

      We Butter The Bread With Butter

      "Wake Up" x Suicide Silence

      Pierce The Veil

      Sleeping With Sirens

      and, often, scene music held no semblance of it's metal roots at all! you may remember hits of the era like "DON'T TRUST ME" x 3OH3!, "Shake It!" x Metro Station, "Good Girls Go Bad" x Cobra Starship, or "Sexting" x Blood on the Dance Floor.


      palette cleanser: "Dirty Diana" x Michael Jackson (The Weeknd Cover)

      so here we've arrived. the year is 2014, and the billboard is topped with pharrell, meghan trainor's debut single, "Shake It Off" x Taylor Swift, and the debut tracks from the likes of Lorde and Sam Smith.

      ...and some guy named Young Thug?

      Wait, who's this Bobby Shmurda guy?

      2 Chainz?

      YG?

      something's a-changing... where's the industry headed?

      find out next time on the emo rap deep dive - chapter three: dirty sprite.

      12 votes
    16. the emo rap deep dive - by earlgreytea. chapter one: sprite.

      howdy there folks! there's been a new breed of rap/hip-hop coursing through the industry in recent years. some songs riding the wave up to the crest in the industry, and gaining some popularity,...

      howdy there folks!

      there's been a new breed of rap/hip-hop coursing through the industry in recent years. some songs riding the wave up to the crest in the industry, and gaining some popularity, some artists intermingled in major controversy, and most relevantly, a lot of really sad late-millenial-early-gen-z kids getting together to cry in the dark, hug each other, dance until their bodies hurt, and get absolutely fucked up.

      this wave, as you can tell by the title of the post and my ceaseless, shitty, un-asked-for poetry, is that of

      #emo rap.

      (edit: as i was writing this i realized that i started to write for a really long time, so i'm just going to leave this at chapter one for now. if you want me to keep going, or if you saw any big ol' lies in here, feel free to let me know in the comments downstairs!)


      chapter one - sprite. the crisp history of emo rap.

      the modern evolution of emo rap is a lovechild of two unexpected homes - the montagues and the capulets. (sorry.)

      the first origin source is from exactly what the name of the genre suggests - emotional rap. in the 90s, the world of rap was vastly different than it is today. rock music was very much still the cultural zeitgeist, most kids daydreamed of being rockstars, and rap lyrics could be seen bouncing between the usual subjects: struggles of racism/classism, or bragging rights over the monetary, the loud, and the beautiful. the quality of life in the inner cities or housing projects, who had the best shooters, gang representation (east side / west side), or just how damn good weed is.

      it goes without saying that, since the birth of the genre, rap has had the capacity to be very introspective and reflective on the lifestyle and living conditions of the artist who'd penned the track. however - it, to my knowledge, was not all that common to see artists focusing on internal struggles, the pressures they faced to succeed financially for the sake of themselves and their families, the pressures they faced to perform well under their labels.

      very early examples of these more self-reflective types of songs come from the big dogs themselves.

      "Trapped" x Tupac Shakur speaks very much on the idea of being "trapped" inside of his neighborhood. this very politically charged song gets right into the perspective of Pac himself, and more importantly, the raw emotion flowing through his head as he looks around his day to day.

      "Suicidal Thoughts" x Notorious B.I.G Biggie himself coming out with one of his most vulnerable tracks he'd ever produced. this relatively short song proves to be very dense and curt, with the man himself talking about how he doesn't believe he's fit to get into heaven, how he believes his mom would have rather aborted him, and contemplating the effects that his death would have on those around him.

      tracks like these set the stage for the next wave of introspective rappers to take the stand, and interestingly enough, our three biggest culprits all seemed to be involved in some form or fashion in the music of the others.

      jumping from the nineties to the naughts, we see our next field of rappers entering stage right - kanye west, kid cudi, and drake.

      one of the first major albums to set the stage for the emo rap that we very well could see carrying the rap torch into the next decade, was none other than kanye west's "808s and Heartbreak". with features from kid cudi, we see kanye exploring a lot of heartbreak, loss, and loneliness on this record. for example, we've got tracks like "Bad News" where it seems like ye recants moments of his finding infidelity in the girl of his dreams, with lyrics like

      Didn't you know
      I was waiting on you
      Waiting on a dream
      That'll never come true
      
      ...
      
      Oh you just gonna
      Keep another love for you
      Oh you just gonna
      Keep it like you never knew
      

      over the next two years after 808s' release, we see cudi come out with a series of small records under his "man on the moon" project, featuring absolute earworms like "Day N' Night" and some of his deepest work like "Soundtrack 2 My Life". over the course of the project we hear cudi very often speaking on topics like depression, the death of his dad, and lots of drugs that were used as a means of escape from his own head.

      and in the next year, drake drops what (i would) consider to be his big-break record "Take Care". after his debut album saw a good deal of commercial success, and got drake a good amount of fame for himself, "Take Care" as an album serves as a bit of cathartic introspection for a young drizzy - often touching on topics like failed relationships, materialism, and loneliness. (mostly though, a lot of heartbreak. i think this is the album that gained drake a lot of negative attention in the rap community for being "soft", and "a bitch". i disagree, but hey, toxic masculinity, what ya gonna do.)

      the most notable songs off of take care came to be "Marvin's Room" with lines like

      Guess she don't have the time to kick it no more
      Flights in the morning
      What you doing that's so important?
      I've been drinking so much
      That I'ma call you anyway and say
      Fuck that nigga that you love so bad
      

      and of course, the title song of the album "Take Care" featuring topics of trust, heartbreak, and this yearning for someone's heart, at the expense of your own emotional wellbeing.

      'Cause that truth hurts, and those lies heal
      And you can't sleep thinking that he lies still
      So you cry still, tears all in the pillow case
      Big girls all get a little taste
      Pushing me away so I give her space
      Dealing with a heart that I didn't break
      

      and with these tracks leading us well into 2012, it's officially been made socially acceptable for rap to reach this level of introspection. yes, you will still catch shit for being "soft" (though less-so nowadays i find), but with absolute industry influencers like ye, cudi, and drizzy, it would be hard to argue that there's no place for this kind of music or these kinds of lyrics in the modern rap scene.

      the tone has been set, and we look onward to the next six years of rap music. what's to come of it? will there be more heavy r&b influence like we saw in Take Care? will electronic beats like we saw in 808s, or futuristic production styles like we had in Man in the Moon take charge? will these trendsetters who have now allowed rap to get interpersonal, raw, and introspective in a new field be paired with some new, unexpected style and add a brand new face to the game?

      join us next time for chapter two: dirt.

      bishop.

      14 votes
    17. The issue with modernizing stories: representation in The Killing Joke (book vs. movie)

      I've very loosely applying the title I used in yesterday's post because quite honestly, I can't even call what they did with the movie a modernization. Intro Old stories are always being updated...

      I've very loosely applying the title I used in yesterday's post because quite honestly, I can't even call what they did with the movie a modernization.

      Intro

      Old stories are always being updated for lots of reasons, ranging from trying to appeal to new audiences to correcting toxic depictions to fitting better to the current social or political climate and more. There's nothing new there. However, one thing I find a bit odd lately, as in the last five years or so, is that a lot of this modernization is actually done pretty poorly in main stream media. We see more forced diversity, queerbaiting, and generally bad storytelling.

      There will be spoilers for both.

      Batman: The Killing Joke by Alan Moore (1988)

      This is probably my least liked batman comic that I still recommend fans read.
      It's one of the few Joker origin stories and have impacted the tone of Batman since. It's honestly the story I think of whenever I'm thinking of Batman and the Joker's relationship, and makes Joker the all-time greatest DC villain.

      And of course, through the paralysis of Barbara Gordon (Batgirl), we get one of the strongest female heros in DC - Oracle.

      The Killing Joke is infamous for adding Batgirl to the list of Women in Refrigerators. The treatment of women, specifically Batgirl, is probably the most easily agreed upon aspect to modernize. She was pulled into this story without much thought on the effects of the character before or after.

      Batman: The Killing Joke (2016)

      When details about this movie was in the works, it was hinted (and then confirmed) that about half an hour will be added to the beginning of the movie and better flesh out Barbara Gordon. This was exciting. The end result was disappointing almost to the point of offense.

      The additional time was devoted to Barbara debating with her "gay best friend" (who is every stereotype that phrase can embody) how her "boss" (Batman) doesn't respect her and that she should just quit. Also comes with a scene where she insists on being heard, is aggressive and then has sex with Batman. Yeah...I can't even truly describe how bad it was... (I'm just glad tickets were sold out at the theater so I didn't have to pay money to see it. I borrowed it from the library for anyone wondering.)

      The quitting thing in particular really bothered me. Barbara is one of the few heros in the DC universe that does not have a tragic back story. She chose to be Batgirl for the same reason someone chooses to be a cop in a corrupt city like Gotham. In the animated series and in Adam West's Batman, Barbara became Batgirl independently. She wasn't seeking approval or permission.

      Enough of the rant...why it didn't work? Ultimately, it was a lack of respect in general. There was a feeling all around that the team was asked to modernize, but they themselves weren't convinced. The end result was what you would expect a bunch of closed minded straight guys to write. Obviously no research was done to better understand gay men or women. They were ultimately not treated as real people. There was no research on Batgirl herself, and this includes watching Adam West's Batman, or reading any comics with Batgirl or Oracle.

      Final thoughts

      The sad thing is, they had a chance to really add to the original story. I would have love to see Batgirl in her prime. Show how strong and capable of a hero she was before she was paralysis and emphasize the loss Batman and Gotham will feel from loosing Batgirl. Show Barbara's determination in perhaps a little Oracle origin story. She's very smart, let's see some of that. Show her dealing with her own loss while still carrying a duty.

      Edit to add: I would also drop the gay best friend. In the new 52, Barbara's roommate is trans and they build a real friendship before she's comfortable enough to tell Barbara. Steal directly from that!

      What are your thoughts? Any other comic adaptations that stood out for you? (There are so many!)

      9 votes
    18. I just received a Fisher Space Pen and I'm as happy as a Jujube

      Look at this beauty I've been wanting a cool pen that I could carry around and for the price I've read that these ones are the best to acquire (Zebra F-701 was a strong contender but I saw so many...

      Look at this beauty

      I've been wanting a cool pen that I could carry around and for the price I've read that these ones are the best to acquire (Zebra F-701 was a strong contender but I saw so many people "modding" them that it looked like it would require some extra effort).

      For all the shit that goes in this world and all the toxicity on the internet, I'm fascinated by how easy it is to find a forum dedicated only to pens. It's just marvelous. Like I know it sounds stupid, but it's almost fucking magic. I remember growing up my only source of esoteric information like "what is the best pen for me" was Gabe, the guy in the paper store next to my parents' apartment, who spent the day reading magazines about modeling, arts and crafts, etc.

      That is also why I am so excited about tildes. If we manage to minimize toxic behavior while increasing in content, this could be like having specialized Gabes about different topics, like going to your local store and seeing that friendly face that tells you "what's up boss" and just gives you info about the best socks you'll ever see, or the most obscure way to buy great glasses for cheap. I was just reading the thread on non-tech workers. Imagine if we could share our knowledge without putting our egos in the middle, how much power we could attain if we just stop clashing against each other. Like for example I just learned a bit about the world of pulp novels thanks to @koan and they are like "oh yeah I write maybe a novel a month no big deal" wtf!!!! And they are freaking humble about it!! I'm sorry I'm melting down a bit here but sometimes it feels like everyone takes this stuff for granted and then proceeds to behave like assholes (especially when I browse reddit or facebook feeds) and it makes me so angry and sad.

      /rant

      But for real, stop and think about the internet sometimes, it's like stopping and looking at the stars and realizing how vast the universe is.

      23 votes
    19. The most forgotten rule of Tildes, and why I'm leaving

      I considered sending this only as a PM to Deimos, but since it actually involves the community and Deimos has no real control over it, I think it's better suited as a public post. Users are always...

      I considered sending this only as a PM to Deimos, but since it actually involves the community and Deimos has no real control over it, I think it's better suited as a public post.

      Users are always quick to point to the "paradox of tolerance" clause in the Tildes vision:

      Tildes will not be a victim of the paradox of tolerance; my philosophy is closer to "if your website's full of assholes, it's your fault".

      But I believe there's an even more important clause, right in the actual Tildes Docs:

      If people treat each other in good faith and apply charitable interpretations, everyone's experience improves. (emphasis mine)

      A lot of users here, including some well-known power users, are quick to call "Hate!" where there is no actual hate. Controversial statements are quickly interpreted to their most extreme. Yes, there have been some hateful incidents here and I won't deny that, but a lot of well-meaning discussions are lumped into the mix and shut down because they might lead to hate or because they are associated with hate.

      Honest discussions, political or otherwise, can't be had in a climate like this. Echo chamber, hivemind, circlejerk... call it whatever, but that's where things are heading.

      For the record, I absolutely agree with this part of the Tildes vision, as written by Deimos:

      I believe that it's possible to support the ability to freely discuss important and controversial topics without also being obligated to allow threats, harassment, and hate speech.

      Threats, harassment, and hate speech have no place anywhere. But sadly, instead of supporting controversial topics as written, it seems certain topics will have no place here because they are controversial. Tildes right now is not the Tildes we were promised, and seems to be veering further away by the day.

      If this is the Tildes everyone wants, that's fine of course. But to me, it's no better than Reddit.

      46 votes
    20. How do I get "good" at art?

      So this is the dumb post of the day. Bear with me. All I can say about art (like paintings and sculpture) is "is cool", "I like it", "it makes me sad" and look like a complete idiot totally out of...

      So this is the dumb post of the day. Bear with me.

      All I can say about art (like paintings and sculpture) is "is cool", "I like it", "it makes me sad" and look like a complete idiot totally out of place. (On the other hand, I can deliver a nuanced analysis of graffiti and hip hop so yeah it's all about the background.) I want to take my partner to a museum and start saying fancy shit like "oh you see the lines here these remind me of Donatello's style of light and shadow". Like I know it's possibly the dumbest thing to want but I really would like to learn more about it and be able to give informed opinions on art pieces.

      Anyway, any recommendations? Maybe some youtube videos or some books? Or should I just say that everything past 1400 is derivative?

      16 votes
    21. Weekly Writing Prompt Group - Prompt 0 - The Road Trip

      Voting has closed for this week's topic. The prompt is... The Road Trip Some questions to help you get started: Who is the traveler? Why are they traveling? Where are they going? Are they going...

      Voting has closed for this week's topic.

      The prompt is...

      The Road Trip

      Some questions to help you get started:

      Who is the traveler?
      Why are they traveling?
      Where are they going? Are they going anywhere?

      The questions are only meant to help you get started. Make it happy or sad, adventure or horror, romance or tragedy. Go where your imagination takes you. Don't feel constrained by what may seem to be the obvious response to the prompt.

      Please keep your submissions between 1000-2000 words (for reference, this topic section is about 200 words), make sure to properly format to Tildes when submitting to the submission thread.

      Submission thread will be created on Wednesday, Aug 29, EST.

      Please feel free to use this thread to brainstorm or share ideas or post any other comments you have about the writing prompt group.

      Have fun everyone! I can't want to see what you create!


      Things I may change:

      I may do away with topic voting if/until the group gets big enough, and I'll just post a weekly prompt.

      Depending on the number of submissions, I may increase the max length.

      11 votes
    22. What artists are very talented/make great music but are sadly overlooked?

      What artists that you know of were written off as one hit wonders or drifted into obscurity, despite them having great music and being talented musicians? I'd like to Nominate Better Than Ezra for...

      What artists that you know of were written off as one hit wonders or drifted into obscurity, despite them having great music and being talented musicians? I'd like to Nominate Better Than Ezra for this title. They're really only best known for Good off of the album Deluxe, but that whole album gives off a road trippy vibe that I haven't been able to find elsewhere. Also Barenaked Ladies, despite their goofy reputation, are great musicians and have a great vocalist. Conventioneers and The Night I Fell Asleep At The Wheel are both really good songs.

      12 votes
    23. Weekly Writing Prompt Group - Week 0 - Open Voting for the Weekly Prompt

      This is week 0 of the Weekly Writing Prompt Group (WWPG). After asking about interest, I've decided to try running this. This is week 0, so I'm trying to see what works and what doesn't. Feel free...

      This is week 0 of the Weekly Writing Prompt Group (WWPG). After asking about interest, I've decided to try running this. This is week 0, so I'm trying to see what works and what doesn't. Feel free to make suggestions!

      Vote for the prompt you like most by adding a 'vote' to the prompt in the comments. Writers and non-writers, are encouraged to vote:

      The Necronaut:
      Who is the traveler in the after life? What do they see? Why are they there? Are they alone or part of a team? Was this an accident? or an organized, international endeavor?

      An Audience of None:
      Who is the performer? What are they performing? Are they truly alone? Is there a watcher after all?

      The Road Trip:
      Are they going towards or away from something? How are they getting there? What happens if they arrive? What happens if they return?

      Vote closes tomorrow, Tuesday, Aug 21, 10AM EST.
      Submissions will be accepted on Wednesday, Aug 29, EST (~9 days).

      The questions are only meant to help you get started. Make it happy or sad, adventure or horror, romance or tragedy. Go where you want. Don't feel constrained by what may seem to be the obvious response to the prompt.


      This will be different from other writing prompts in three ways:

      1. You are encouraged to take your time with the prompt. After a prompt has been chosen, I will post another thread after a week for submissions to that week's prompt.

      2. I will personally read and provide feedback to every submission in the submission thread. It will be more than just a "good job" or acknowledgement. I will highlight things I liked, didn't like, how I think things could be improved etc.

      3. Selection of the prompt is open to everyone, even non-participants. I hope this will encourage the greater tildes community to follow the WWPG and to participate by reading and commenting on the creative works of the writers.

      What I feel separates this style of prompt from others is that it encourages writers to let their ideas breathe and it provides a creative outlet for writers who may be intimidated by the faster nature of other writing prompts.

      Another aspect that I feel makes this unique is the promise of feedback. I believe that if you take the time to really work on something, you should get something back. To make this possible, there are some things that I need from you:

      1. The submission must be completely original. In the future I may post more fan-fictiony prompts, but I want to encourage brand new ideas from the writers.

      2. Keep the length of your submissions between 1000 and 2000 words. This is to make it easier for me to read (as we continue I may extend the length). This should also keep you well within the 50,000 character limit.

      3. Avoid shopping large tracts of your writing as the goal is provide new works on the submission date. However, feel free to brainstorm ideas.

      4. Make sure to properly format to tildes. Feel free to also post your stories to your personal blogs etc., but I will only provide feedback for work posted in tildes.

      12 votes
    24. Compassion is power, but I'm power-averse

      This is a tricky personal conundrum of mine. I'll try to articulate it clearly. I believe in compassion, and I want to live in harmony with compassionate tendencies inside. But at the same time,...

      This is a tricky personal conundrum of mine. I'll try to articulate it clearly.

      I believe in compassion, and I want to live in harmony with compassionate tendencies inside. But at the same time, in the act of extending compassion, there appears to be an in-built power gradient: the "giver" is somehow in an "advantaged" position, and the receiver a more disadvantaged one.

      An example. I was once in a fast-food restaurant, waiting to order, and I saw the order-taker was obviously new and very nervous and skittish at her job. So after I placed my order I expressed how much I appreciate her service and that I thought she was doing a good job. It was truly what I wanted to say, and I thought she took this well, like, she looked more relaxed as she beamed.

      But then there was a power gradient. I gave her something that she wouldn't/couldn't have given me. She was the more distressed one, and this power gradient emphasized that. I don't mean that bystanders were made more conscious of her distress. I mean, it had the potential to make me more conscious of my privilege and her her lack thereof.

      And I'm aversive to power. I can be highly sceptical and critical of power. I don't feel easy to have power over someone else. I have had troubled relations with power figures in my life. I easily confuse the natural, benign activation of power with the reflexive, defensive, "shields-up" reaction that I often find myself in. To explain a bit, the latter is really a form of anxiety, perhaps a trauma from experiences of hypercompetition, isolation, and emotional neglect in the past.

      In the end, I thirst after commonality, equality, brothersisterhood, close and meaningful contact with others as they are, as human beings, on level ground, side by side, sharing the common condition in our vulnerabilities... But there's this aspect of my character, i.e. the tendency to get tense and look for a "higher ground" and occupy there, just to be on the safe (more powerful!) side. There's this haughty, difficult-to-approach, high-brow me, that I feel get in the way.

      I fee sad and somewhat confused about this. I think I'm partly venting, partly asking about your similar experiences. Please consider this topic fairly open-ended. If you have something to say about it, I'm eager to listen to you.

      Thanks!

      7 votes
    25. music.

      bishop. tw: death i remember the day that they died. you called me at work in the middle of my shift shooken up, you wailed and cried you were hours away divorce was on the horizon your mother she...

      bishop.

      tw: death


      i remember the day that they died.
      you called me at work in the
      middle of my shift shooken up,
      you wailed and cried
      you were hours away
      divorce was on the horizon
      your mother
      she went to get the last of her things
      brothers in tow, each under her wings
      wanting to grab their toys, their cars,
      living in an apartment, left the trampoline

      the pool's mostly empty now, and green.

      i was always taught that ghosts scream
      that any haunted house is a broken record
      out of a low-budget horror scene
      blood on the walls, ripped at the seams,
      what they never tell you in the movies
      is that the real scare is going to the house
      six months later and finding it empty

      and silent.

      all that's left is the memory of the violent
      no one left to water the yard
      grass is yellow, in the garden
      wilted violets
      and the paintings still hang on the walls.
      the lamp is still there on the nightstand
      the pots and pans are still in the kitchen
      the paper is still on the desk
      everything is still where it should be
      every item right where it was left
      except this sudden void in your soul
      and the unending feeling of being depressed
      and lost,

      scared

      a lost lamb in a land once shared
      a home where you would draw or write
      and now all that's left is light
      flittering in through the windows
      that just feels so out of place
      paintings on the floor covering up
      the holes where the bullets laid
      open casket you broke down
      at the sight of his little face

      god what a fucking monster

      two years now since the day you lost her
      and i have no idea how you are.
      i took it upon myself to watch over you, a foster
      and hoped to show you real love after this imposter
      came into your life and ripped it in pieces
      with this targeted hatred and ceaseless screaming
      god if i could go back in time.

      even still now i wish to trade their lives for mine

      even if it just meant another day,
      maybe one last time for you to
      share a smile or say goodbye
      to make peace and hug your mom
      or read harry potter to your brothers here
      in person and not occasionally from beyond
      the grave that plays that same god-fucking-forsaken
      song as the house does when you visit.

      silence.

      why dont they play music in the graveyards.

      why dont they play music in the graveyards.

      7 votes
    26. Gotham - the okay-est not-Batman Batman story part 2: Makeovers

      As mentioned in part 1: Diversity, I'm currently rewatching Gotham on Netflix, and just writing up a whatever thoughts I have about the show. I find this show to be really good and really bad in a...

      As mentioned in part 1: Diversity, I'm currently rewatching Gotham on Netflix, and just writing up a whatever thoughts I have about the show. I find this show to be really good and really bad in a lot of places, both in storytelling in general and as a comic adaptation.

      Warning, there will be spoilers for the first three seasons (what I've seen up to).

      What I'm calling a makeover trope

      I'm basically defining any transformation, usually from undesirable/imperfect to desirable/perfect in the eyes of someone (usually a love interest). How this trope plays out is generally very gender specific, so I'm breaking it up into men and women. This trope is definitely not limited to what I'm going to cover.

      Women and the power of makeup
      When this trope is applied to a woman, there's generally shopping, hair and make-up involved. Examples includes:

      • creepy kidnapping, bathing and redress of a woman before presenting her to usually a man
      • common whip off her glasses and let down her hair
      • evil or sad all-black with heavy eyeliner
      • crazy/mad extra sexy make-up and clothes
      • girl-power shopping/spa day

      Men and the power of pushups
      When this trope is applied to a man, there's generally a training montage. Examples include:

      • hitting the gym
      • arming themselves with new weapons
      • new sharp tailored clothes
      • spiking up their hair, or shaving
      • turning evil after a betrayal

      Why I hate them

      I admit, it's a bit unfair to say I hate them, since this trope is pretty central to a lot of stories and will go unnoticed if done well. Character growth (in either direction) move stories. However, they stick out so much when tossed in poorly or for no reason, and I really do hate them then. Generally when I see them:

      • they are often shallow, such as just changing their hair (sure you can argue the symbolism of this, but it's cliche it's likely to be a reach to do so)
      • they change an individual character, but doesn't add to their relationships in a meaningful matter
      • (for women) they come with a sense of "taming", usually including a "breaking" phase, and usually by a man who just knows better

      How they can be good

      The makeover trope can be a very powerful character development tool. It can be driven by the plot or drive the plot. For me a good makeover trope will likely include:

      • internal desires to change, such as acknowledging a personal fault and wanting to improve
      • natural transformations, such as growing up or learning from experience
      • improves (or breaks down) existing relationships by comparing or contrasting our character with their close ones. This can work great to emphasis who they were to who they are or who they want to be

      Finally getting to Gotham

      Gotham, as a prequel to Batman, are origin stories, which by definition are transformation stories. We're watching the city of Gotham being transformed, Bruce Wayne becoming Batman, Oswald becoming the Penguin, and so on.

      In no particular order, here are some makeovers that stood out to me:

      Ivy Pepper (Hotness makeover)
      She's a tiny stupid kid with frizzy hair, who magically grows ten years and becomes super hot. So now you have childlike innocents meet boobs. But she's Poison Ivy, and she grew like a weed...get it?

      Safe to say, I did not like this change.

      Leslie Thompkins (Evil makeover)
      She's hurting after her husband is killed, and decides to use a drug to "free" herself. Though I didn't like this plot, I actually have no issues with this transformation, except for two things:

      • Why the booby black clothes and eyeliner? This is just a pet peeve of mine. I just want to see a woman turn evil and not become some sexy fetish.
      • No follow through. There are no consequences to this transformation. Jim, being the hero, will force her to take the antidote, and that's that. As cliche as it would be, I would prefer Jim somehow talk her into taking it, instead of just forcing it on her. Now it's just a weird take on the damsel in distress trope.

      I should also add, I actually don't like how characters need an excuse to do bad things. I think it would have been better if she just decided to screw Jim over, instead of this whole roundabout way of doing so, but still basically saying she loves him. Guess this saves the writers a redemption line.

      Barbara Kean (Madness makeover)
      Barbara is kidnapped and tortured by the Orge who believes she's his soulmate. Though this has makeover tropes I really dislike, specifically the "breaking/taming" and the "I see you for who you are and I will set you free" that comes with a huge dose of patriarchy, I actually thought this was pretty well done and revealed to the audience. I just wished they had more follow through regarding Barbara herself after this, instead of the shift to simply crazy, but still obsessed with Jim.

      Isabella (Dead girlfriend makeover)
      After learning that Ed (the Riddler) accidentally murdered his old girlfriend, who she looks exactly alike, Isabella decides to dress up as his dead girlfriend to prove "he won't hurt her". Little bit of a reverse of the the common trope, as she puts on glasses and ties her hair in a pony tail for this one. She's a disposable refrigerator girl, so my expectations were pretty low here. Still annoying to watch though.

      Oswald Cobblepot (Evil/power-up makeover)
      This character actually probably transforms the most through the series. There are lots of cliche bits, including sharp new clothes, but his transformations are generally a result of his own work and are fun.

      Selina Kyle (Dress-up makeover)
      The writers generally handle this character really well, so I'm not sure why they decided to toss in a random "guy sends over boxes and bags of shoes and clothes so you can dress up". She does dress up for the charity event, but easily goes back to herself. So, this was cliche, but has no consequences, ...so meh?

      Bruce Wayne (Toughness/reality makeover)
      The entire series basically has Bruce's slow transformation to Batman in the subplot. His interactions with Selina gives him the reality checks he's looking for, while contrasting his believes, specifically with Batman's infamous "no killing" rule. His makeover is deliberate, strongly internally motivated and permanent. His growth is believable.

      Final thoughts

      So this turned out way longer than I intended, and I actually didn't include nearly as much detail as I was going to.

      Thoughts? How does Gotham compare to other shows or stories?

      3 votes
    27. crema.

      ive had this idea in the back of my head for awhile, roll with me. sad parties. so much emphasis on things being perfect, people being perfect, work being perfect, life being perfect. so many...

      ive had this idea in the back of my head for awhile, roll with me.

      sad parties.

      so much emphasis on things being perfect, people being perfect, work being perfect, life being perfect. so many people caught up in social media subconsciously at battle to live a filter-perfect lifestyle.

      sad parties.

      a bunch of people youre close to get together at a comfortable apartment, good food, lots of drinks, lots of drugs. everyones free to indulge as they wish. all the lights go off except for a fireplace or some low-impact nightlights by an easel, and theres just a stream of sad music in the background. no words spoken unless you directly enter a conversation with someone. no forced interaction. just lots of pillows, blankets, and vibes.

      really want one of these. might make it a regular thing once i head out west.

      anyways, back to the reason we're all here. more sad drunk poetry<3

      thank you for all those who leave the comments. i honestly wouldnt keep posting if it werent for you all giving me that little nudge of support. it means a lot.

      much love.

      bishop.


      metal must be the best flavor of ice cream.
      take a double scoop, hope i dont see the morning
      leaded kiss orgasm, baby send me out moaning
      dropped my puppet strings, guess im not worth controlling.
      metal must be the best flavor of ice cream.
      must be in a coma, two years been a bad dream.
      poor lost lamb caught up with a black sheep
      just another sad white kid, rest in peace Peep.

      maybe some lives werent meant for the living
      maybe some dreams were meant to go missing
      kinda miss the way you would scream like a banshee
      kinda miss the way you would threaten to leave me
      wanna go back to the days when you need me
      always liked how youd cut me deep, and then heal me
      if it makes you smile when i cry, then abuse me.
      really wouldnt mind if you came back to use me,

      cant feel good enough on the nicotine therapy
      oxygen coming through airily, barely
      slaps on my face were a heavenly remedy
      soft pink lace was a beautiful heresy.
      pain, drugs, suicidal tendencies, obscurity
      wanna fade to black, tell God roll the credit scene
      another funeral in the wake of our legacy
      metal must be the best flavor of ice cream

      (beat.)

      metal must be the best flavor of ice cream.
      take a double scoop, hope i dont see the morning
      leaded kiss orgasm, baby send me out moaning
      dropped my puppet strings, guess im not worth controlling.
      metal must be the best flavor of ice cream.
      must be in a coma, two years been a bad dream.
      poor lost lamb caught up with a black sheep
      knocking back four different drugs just to get sleep

      metal is the only thing i feel around me
      liquor by the half cup never stops pouring
      you held me down, now i feel like im falling
      up to the sky, sunshine in the mourning.

      4 votes
    28. Have we talked about alts? Are they OK to have?

      Hi, I have but two accounts on Reddit; one for posting stuff I make, having fun discussions, and maybe small debates about stuff that doesn't matter (games, movies, etc.); and another for...

      Hi,

      I have but two accounts on Reddit; one for posting stuff I make, having fun discussions, and maybe small debates about stuff that doesn't matter (games, movies, etc.); and another for political discussion/debates, because sadly, my progressive views (and admittedly abrasive tendencies when the party I'm talking to is themselves abrasive) tend to get me enough negative attention that I've been doxxed twice (admittedly over the course of 12 years, so not much).

      Are alts allowed? If so, doesn't that just provide me with another 5 invites (that I will totally not abuse on account I've only used but one of the ones I've got/don't know enough friends to care about leaving Reddit)?

      If not, totally understandable-- I'll just avoid posting stuff I make in the event I find myself getting into a political debate.

      Thanks for the time/info either way,
      Doug

      9 votes
    29. A layperson's introduction to Homebrewing

      Whats this about? @wanda-seldon started a thread over at ~science in hopes of generating more user created content. My plan is to post some introductions myself, in fields like mechanical...

      Whats this about?

      @wanda-seldon started a thread over at ~science in hopes of generating more user created content. My plan is to post some introductions myself, in fields like mechanical engineering and automation (is anyone interested in it anyways?). But until I feel like I would do it proper, I figured I'd try something similar with a much lower barrier of entry. I'll write about some hobbies of mine, in a way that goes more indepth about the process, but still shallow enough to function as an introduction. And if folks are interested in more in-depth stuff or pointers on where to go, I'll take care of that.

      So on todays topic, homebrewing. What is it, why would you bother, and what's actually involved in it?

      What's Homebrewing?

      Put simply, homebrewing is the art of making beer yourself. It's not really that complicated to be honest.

      Why Homebrewing?

      • It's (relatively) cheap.

      If you got a few basic kitchen items (pots, ladle, cups, etc), you already have most items needed for brewing a small quantity. A few additional tools will be required, like a food grade plastic container, a water lock, etc. but if you treat them proper they can be used for years after years. Ingredient cost is neglible.

      • Quality.

      A common reaction many have with homebrewed beer is how thick and rich in flavour it is, compared to your average supermarket beer. Especially if your experience is with light beers (in which case I believe Monty Python said it best, it's fucking close to water). It's like comparing that sad pie you can buy in the cooler section, compared to something fresh out of the oven with the sweetest fruits and crispiest crust.

      • Easy to learn, hard to master.

      If your goal is to make a good beer, you only need two "skills". Good working hygiene and patience. Beyond that, any complication you want to add is up to you. You can start with a simple ale and work your way towards horribly complicated recipes that seem more like a chemistry exam than a hobby.

      Whats actually involved in it?

      So what do you actually do? I'll keep it short, even though I could write a book if I wanted to cover everything. Brewing is made out of three phases. The actual brewing, the fermenting and the bottling.

      Brewing

      You mix malts (and/or barley, wheat, oats, etc) with water, which you will draw a wort from. The wort will be the basis of your beer. A wort is a bit like a tea from a tea mix in this sense. Also it's sickly sweet (so taste test on your own risk). The sugar from the malt will be what is turned into alcohol during fermentation. In a similar way, that we use fruit sugar for wines/ciders or honey for mead.

      Fun fact: In Sweden and Norway, elks drunk on rotten (fermented) fruit they eat from the ground is a rare but real phenomena.

      Once you have a wort, the wort is boiled up and hops are supplied. Usually hops are divided in two categories. Bitter hops and aroma hops. Though that has more to do with when you add hops in the brewing process. The hops add flavour primarily from the oils (which give the fresh and fruity taste) and the resin (which gives the bitter taste). The resin takes a certain amount of boiling time to properly release, so hops added early in the process will contribute to bitterness.

      The liquid is then cooled and stored in a container with a bit of yeast. That marks the start of the fermentation period.

      Fermentation

      Fermentation is fairly straight forward. Yeast loves sugar. And will keep eating it until most is gone. Alcohol, is a byproduct of this process.

      Bottling

      Once fermentation is (nearly) done, the beer is transferred into bottles. After a few days of waiting, a pressure should have built inside your bottles which will create the nice bubbliness we know from beers. Toss on a label if you wan't to brag and want to make sure that graphical designer education was not for naught.

      Swell, how do I get into it?

      How do you get into it? Technically speaking, you could start with no-mash brewing. Though I would recommend against it, as it takes out the charm of actually brewing, since you just add water and call it a day. Alternatively, there are several good sources on this. The american homebrewers association for instance have a good quick guide for some instructions. Though if you wan't to go serious about it, I recommend to read up on the specific processes, and what influences them.

      Afterwords

      Does it sound interesting? Bring a buddy, and make a day of it. Make your own labels too if you wan't to brag to friends and family. If you have questions, I will answer anything. Need help setting up or want a plan, I can help with that too.

      Edit: Would recommend reading @piratepants comment in the comment section. It expands a lot of the things mentioned here, and goes a lot more into the actual processes while brewing. If you got this far, it's worth continueing.

      24 votes
    30. Sidebars for FAQs, subtopic rules, or Wiki-esque reference links?

      I'm probably about to be guilty of causing the problem I'd like to solve, namely the endless iterations of questions asked and previously answered, or seemingly innocent questions that are...

      I'm probably about to be guilty of causing the problem I'd like to solve, namely the endless iterations of questions asked and previously answered, or seemingly innocent questions that are tantamount to trolling.

      I'm sure there have been prior discussions about pinning items, and I've seen prior commentary about further refining the ground rules for some sub-group areas.

      For the sake of efficiency and comity, there are communities where it would be helpful to create a common body of rules, reference material or other semi-permanent posts which should be regarded as the minimum governance/factual/technical basis for having a productive discussion.

      From a UI design perspective, Reddit, xda-developers, and some other forums have created visually confusing, dis-unified means of handling this - there are multipage FAQ/Wiki top links plus sidebars plus top pins. There's considerable independence among Reddit forums as to which model is chosen, furthering the confusion. I'd like to see Tildes "keep it simple", so pinned topics may be the way to maintain consistency and uniformity.

      Seeking thoughts and discussion about whether this is needed, feasible, desirable, etc.

      [What prompted this query was a a random response on this topic which posited a strawman argument so disingenuous that I wanted to run off and pull a Wiki together just so I could say, "do this minimal amount of homework and come back later, or get reported for being an obvious troll".]

      Note: edited to remove confusion of groups, sub-groups and topics, since I hadn't had enough coffee yet. Sadly I can't do this for the topic title...

      11 votes
    31. miele.

      for those keeping track, this title's in italian, not afrikaans. normally don't "summer" kind of stuff, but as always, i just write what's on my mind once the liquor hits. hope you all enjoy.<3...

      for those keeping track, this title's in italian, not afrikaans.

      normally don't "summer" kind of stuff, but as always, i just write what's on my mind once the liquor hits.

      hope you all enjoy.<3

      much love

      bishop


      sometimes I need a bubble bath.
      ginger ale, vodka splash
      couple friends, a couple grams
      electronic cigarettes.
      bath bomb with the glitter in
      free pass to commit a sin
      babygirl let's dive in.
      bet we won't even remember it.

      standing at the precipice
      not a lot of trust to give
      broken down, a sad kid
      you're steady in the madness
      babygirl I feel it happening
      tension slipping kinda rapid
      cold beers and a hot kiss
      forbidden peach, like genesis

      i write music
      to sin to.
      baby let me
      sing with you
      sigh the notes, we
      can sing tunes
      you're the nectar
      the gods knew
      i write music
      to sin to.
      baby let me
      sing with you
      sigh the notes, we
      can sing tunes
      you're the nectar
      the gods knew

      (beat.)

      nicotine and a lotta weed
      open up a new side of me
      one that wanna see you smiling
      fuck what your other man think
      two friends in a summer fling
      you bite your lip when you kiss me
      's why you always invite me,
      when you're home and feel lonely.

      Want my music to go hard,
      Sing for my friends in the dark,
      Get to drunk to remember,
      The bullshit feeling sad part

      sometimes I need a bubble bath.
      ginger ale, vodka splash
      couple friends, a couple grams
      electronic cigarettes.
      bath bomb with the glitter in
      free pass to commit a sin
      babygirl let's dive in.
      bet we won't even remember it.

      3 votes
    32. traan.

      fuck anybody who says my shit isn't cultured. sorry if my language isn't okay on the site. v drunk at the moment here it goes anyway enjoy. or don't i guess, either way. j'en veux plus exister...

      fuck anybody who says my shit isn't cultured.

      sorry if my language isn't okay on the site.

      v drunk at the moment

      here it goes anyway

      enjoy.

      or don't i guess,

      either way.


      j'en veux plus
      exister
      içi.

      c'est impossible
      à dormir
      depuis

      février quand
      t'étais
      parti

      la bouteille
      à remplacé
      therapie

      Tu m'as
      donné pas de
      sympathie

      c'est parce'que
      toi que je
      ecris

      tous les chansons
      qui parle'd
      mourir

      ouais c'est
      vrai q'je rêve
      d'suicide

      Je plonge
      dans l'alcool
      comme piscine

      Daily still
      wonder if
      you miss me

      Daddy still
      gonna miss
      his baby

      I really miss
      the way you'd
      reassure me

      comme

      "Oauis, papa
      c'est que tout va-t-
      allez bien

      Non, monsieur,
      tu ne mourras pas
      cette semaine.

      Je vais, faire
      sûr que je prends
      soin de toi

      I will love you,
      cross my heart and
      swear to God. "

      "Oauis, papa
      c'est que tout va-t-
      allez bien

      Non, monsieur,
      tu ne mourras pas
      cette semaine.

      Je vais, faire
      sûr que je prends
      soin de toi

      I will love you,
      cross my heart and
      swear to God. "

      J'en veux plus
      exister
      sans toi

      Je m'ai demandé
      chaque nuit
      pourquoi?

      Tu m'as laiseé
      completement
      pantois

      Je'm sens
      maintenant
      trop inadéquat

      Would you like me
      better if I had
      some photoshop

      Would you come to
      visit if my breathing
      ever stopped

      Better yet, I
      wonder if I'd rather
      have you not

      I just wish I had
      some truth before
      I fade to black

      ouais, monsieur.

      tu ne mourras pas
      cette semaine

      6 votes
    33. koeël.

      been sitting on two of these most of the day, might be a little messy. i feel like it's a little stale since i left it waiting, and i'm significantly more sober than when i usually write. as...

      been sitting on two of these most of the day, might be a little messy.

      i feel like it's a little stale since i left it waiting, and i'm significantly more sober than when i usually write.

      as always, comments welcome. or ignore this entirely if you're not feeling it<3

      bless.

      bishop


      also this one gets somewhat graphic, gonna start leaving these trigger warnings up top - drugs, alcohol, suicide, covers it i think, let me know if i should add anything else


      been smoking and drinking
      just so i can cope
      gave her the ring
      she put me on the ropes
      new girl show up but
      i don't got no hope
      my heart is still sinking
      i'm trying to float like

      Gretel, baby, where did you go?
      no crumbs left I can throw
      Hansel in the forest alone
      put me out of house and my home
      hands full of green and some blow
      no drinks left but the coke
      she's laughing now - am I the joke?
      turned my heartthrob into a stroke -

      your bedside's left wide
      open to the moonlight
      head high, red eye
      stranded on the roadside
      you kissed, i cried,
      while i watched papaw die
      No sleep, four nights
      you told me it's alright
      helped me keep my head high
      helped me say my goodbyes
      then you hit me blindside
      didn't get a goodbye

      peace, bye, next flight,
      right into his arms like
      you've been biding time,
      waiting for the day to strike me

      down.

      down.

      down.

      Left me tied strapped to the bed
      Headphones looping what you said
      Promises we could stay friends.
      Cool ones pour down my head
      I know the river Styx runs red
      Little siren told me "Baby, dive in"
      Closed eyes, woke up dead.
      Didn't know God's a raven.

      Now you got your Raybans
      and your black Timbs
      Got your new Amex,
      one in the black print
      Hope it was worth it
      on your conscience
      that you lied through your teeth
      and he fucking lost it

      costless

      Must be nice right?
      If it's not on the bill
      it don't have a price
      Fuck being nice,
      Fuck doing what's right,
      What's another sad white
      boy taking his life?

      Masochistic statistic
      when his legs kick
      Fuck vacation,
      Miami,
      Fuck a new chick
      Cool one rain straight
      to the forehead
      Gorgeous.
      One less problem
      to deal with. Lord, yes.

      Gretel, baby, where did you go?
      no crumbs left I can throw
      Hansel in the forest alone
      put me out of house and my home
      hands full of green and some blow
      no drinks left but the coke
      she's laughing now - am I the joke?
      turned my heartthrob into a stroke -

      4 votes
    34. dagga.

      last one for today, feel like i've been littering all over tildes and i dont want to be the only thing people see on the homepage. i normally only do these like once a week, but i kept finding...

      last one for today, feel like i've been littering all over tildes and i dont want to be the only thing people see on the homepage.

      i normally only do these like once a week, but i kept finding words that work today.

      sorry for the clutter,

      cheers.


      bliky at the forehead
      hit the floor dead.
      i give you advice
      so that i feel important
      tell me to stay im
      a little distorted
      cross-faded vision
      is going contorted

      take off my seatbelt
      and i start to floor it
      fuck all your comments
      i know its abhorrent
      i only go out in the
      night when it's dormant
      in hopes that I'll see
      a brick wall and ignore it

      gorgeous.

      tell me, do you cry or get lonely?
      Do you ever feel soulless?
      Do you ever stop and reminisce?
      Baby I want to feel free.
      Free.

      (beat.)

      dagga in die bak - smoke
      til the morning
      i just want you back
      still hear you moaning
      hard to look back,
      know that you happened
      hard to look back,
      see what we had then
      knife hits the floor, saying
      what the fuck man
      you're a grown man how
      do you function
      why do you do this
      you're above this
      Cus I don't know what's real
      Baby I want to feel free

      Free

      Free

      Free

      bliky at the forehead
      hit the floor dead.
      i give you advice
      so that i feel important
      tell me to stay im
      a little distorted
      cross-faded vision
      is going contorted

      take off my seatbelt
      and i start to floor it
      fuck all your comments
      i know its abhorrent
      i only go out in the
      night when it's dormant
      in hopes that I'll see
      a brick wall and ignore it
      it's gorgeous.

      6 votes
    35. stoep.

      nevermind. my stoep is warm. my stoep is warm. can't keep my calm it should probably raise alarms if my stoep is warm my stoep is warm that there's a problem and I dont know how to stop it fucked...

      nevermind.


      my stoep is warm.
      my stoep is warm.
      can't keep my calm
      it should probably raise alarms if
      my stoep is warm
      my stoep is warm
      that there's a problem
      and I dont know how to stop it

      fucked up his arm
      with bleeding scars
      that kid's an addict he
      has no idea how to quit
      Insha'allah
      One day he'll stop
      If he ever dulls the edges of
      the shards of broken promises

      'llahu-allah
      'llahu-allah
      That a broken-legged lamb
      can still hobble into Providence
      i hear the caw
      i hear the caw
      woke up in a sweat and
      saw a raven at my doorstep

      (beat.)

      messed up inside
      messed up inside
      only when he's fucked up
      does he really feel alive
      the pain you feel
      the pain you feel
      is the happiness you had before
      So pay it up boy, that's the price.

      my stoep is warm.
      my stoep is warm.
      can't keep my calm
      it should probably raise alarms if
      my stoep is warm
      my stoep is warm
      that there's a problem
      and I dont know how to stop it

      fucked up his arm
      with bleeding scars
      that kid's an addict he
      has no idea how to quit
      Insha'allah
      One day he'll stop
      If he ever dulls the edges of
      the shards of broken promises

      the stoa's hot
      the stoa's hot
      how you gonna run from
      a problem that's inside your head

      it's going dark,
      it's going dark
      beautiful curse if you
      find that you woke up again

      5 votes
    36. kraai.

      hi there. before you read this, it's another one of my shitty sad poem/lyrics doohickeys. i generally just post these up here as a way to vent, clear my head when i cant sleep. if you're alright...

      hi there.

      before you read this, it's another one of my shitty sad poem/lyrics doohickeys.

      i generally just post these up here as a way to vent, clear my head when i cant sleep.

      if you're alright with sad stuff, feel free to read along. if not, that's cool too. just wanted to give a heads up in case there's stuff on your mind you're trying not to think about.

      anyways,

      thanks for stopping by,

      bishop.


      i just want to sip
      four bottles of wine
      fall asleep in the bath
      pray to god that i die
      summer's on hold
      only winter in the night
      i only felt right
      when i was by your side

      been in my head so
      long that i lost my mind.
      running little low on
      words, because you never write

      cant get to sleep until 4am
      nothing feels home like an angry bed
      cant find a shoulder to lay my head,
      missing warm lips and your icy legs.

      trying real hard not to fuck with meds.
      goddamn hard not to fuck with meds.
      can't get the picture out of my head
      of you in my bed so i guess instead

      i just want to sip
      four bottles of wine
      fall asleep in the bath
      pray to god that i die
      summer's on hold
      only winter in the night
      i only felt right
      when i was by your side
      hard to want to try if you
      don't want to be alive
      only crashing hard now
      because you made me feel high
      in a week you were gone,
      couldn't get a kiss bye
      bled your name out of my arm
      once upon a midnight

      can't stop looking at
      your shadow on my bedside
      all the worst demons
      are the ones we have inside
      splashing turned to drowning in
      the ocean of her blue eyes
      x on the map,
      wherefore does her love lie
      Nyctophobic and you
      took my dog and my flashlight
      Guess I didn't know that
      certain spiders can spin lies
      diamonds in midnight
      can try, but still won't shine
      cant turn it down, honey,
      do you hear a loud cry?

      (

      beat. sip some tea.

      )

      if the whole world's upside
      down, can you stand upright?
      guess this is the toll for
      the road less traveled by
      caught in the valley of the
      dark - ride, baby, ride
      make me feel high and
      you can hurt me until i die

      i just want to sip
      four bottles of wine
      fall asleep in the bath
      pray to god that i die
      summer's on hold
      only winter in the night
      i only felt right
      when i was by your side
      hard to want to try if you
      don't want to be alive
      only crashing hard now
      because you made me feel high
      in a week you were gone,
      couldn't get a kiss bye
      never heard that sound before,
      do you hear a loud cry?

      10 votes
    37. Winter poem

      A little pretext. I wrote this poem in november 2017, and I slightly improved it today. I enjoy creating stories and poems are a way that I did not try much before. I don't know much about it,...

      A little pretext. I wrote this poem in november 2017, and I slightly improved it today. I enjoy creating stories and poems are a way that I did not try much before. I don't know much about it, except the few things I learned in school and i can't remember most of it. Also english is my second language and there might be some words that don't fit in.
      The changes in lines and rythm are intended to match the story.
      If this does not meet the high-quality content and discussion and therefore doesn't fit in with ~, let me know and I will remove it.

      To stop my rambling: Feel free to leave criticism. I plan to make poetry my hobby so any tips, comments, feedback and thoughts are appreciated.

      Somewhere,
      deep in the wild
      Layed there,
      Cold a little child.
      
      It wasn't very long ago,
      The rotten did not show,
      All consuming deafening silence,
      Pierced only by crows crying violent.
      
      What happened here?
      She ran from fear.
      To escape the grasp,
      Of the ones she hold dear.
      
      One soul has passed before her,
      Taking with his life,
      The only thing she ever strived
      Her mother, father and her brother
      Two of these caused the disaster.
      
      It began with a fight,
      In a cold winter night,
      Snow falling lightly,
      And the ice growing wildly.
      
      Suddenly the moment
      when all seemed to fly
      Death was potent
      Coming in the blink of an eye.
      
      Crushed by the car's roof,
      Not needing any more proof.
      The little boy left,
      She cried over his death
      
      Sad things passed
      and bad will follow.
      To escape the sorrow
      Two chose their paths
      
      Alcohol in mornings and nights,
      Followed by overbearing fights,
      Inbetween this shit
      Was one little kid
      
      Treated like air,
      It was just not fair
      Her family's break,
      Was the last thing she could take
      
      She ran into the woods,
      Only on foot.
      Soon she lost her trail
      And soon after she wailed.
      
      In her last thoughts
      she met her god.
      Looked him deep in the eye
      And pierced him with a knive
      
      Somewhere,
      deep in the wild
      Layed there,
      Cold a little child.
      
      

      Edit: Formatting mistakes

      17 votes
    38. What do you hope to see, content-wise, from Tildes?

      Last night I posted a topic called "real sad boi hours", a ritualistic kind of post I've carried over from Reddit. I chose to post it in ~talk since the description for the group says it is for...

      Last night I posted a topic called "real sad boi hours", a ritualistic kind of post I've carried over from Reddit. I chose to post it in ~talk since the description for the group says it is for "Open-ended discussions with fellow Tildes users, casual or serious", and I felt there is nothing more open-ended or casual than real sad boi hours. At first, the topic was meant just as it usually does on Reddit. Got a few responses in which people talked about their day and how they were feeling. But right now, the most voted comment is complaining about how we need to restrict invitations to prevent low effort users like me from joining. One thing the user said was that is is obvious there are users joining who have not read the manifesto. I'm just going to spew my own opinion on a few points here:

      1. I don't think gatekeeping is a solution, especially since iirc this site is not going to be permanently invite-only. Not to mention that's just a childish solution anyway.

      2. I don't know what is expected from ~talk. As I said before, I legitimately believe my nightly "real sad boi hours" posts fit exactly what the description of the group says. However, that is up to interpretation I suppose.

      3. If my post was against some rule (which apparently roughly 17 users believe it is), there should be some kind of rule set or moderation set in place (though I understand why there isn't, the site being private still and all). My impression so far has been that if you don't like content, you just ignore it. But now I'm seeing that apparently, people don't like to ignore it. They want me gone.

      4. Is every user expected to read the manifesto? You may be able to get away with this while it's private (and even then, there is still users like me who only read a few pages) but if/when this site goes public, expecting every user or even just most the users to read the manifesto is a pipe dream. As far as I can tell, the reddiquette (which I have also not read) is shorter than the manifesto and nobody reads that either unless they need to. The only reason I know the reddiquette is because I've picked up on bits of it as time went on.

      Maybe I'm just a butt-hurt bitch that people complained about me and I can't take criticism. I'm sure people who disliked my post will think that is it. I also may have a skewed perception of what this site is. I view it as an improvement upon Reddit and honestly I think some of this innovation may work great, which is why I'm here in the first place. I want to hear your take on what I said, and anything else you'd like to add.

      26 votes
    39. What is your favourite Stephen King book, and why?

      I'd have to go with The Long Walk, personally. It's quite haunting, the way they had every choice to sign up, but chose to anyway. The way they never quite get used to seeing their fellow walkers...

      I'd have to go with The Long Walk, personally. It's quite haunting, the way they had every choice to sign up, but chose to anyway. The way they never quite get used to seeing their fellow walkers get shot. I love the ambiguous fascist state: what exactly happened to America in the Long Walk? There is an oblique reference to fighting Nazis in the 50s for instance, but the time period is never quite mentioned.

      All in all, it's remarkable, but terribly sad. It reminded me of boys going off to war, and the truth behind all ambition.

      8 votes
    40. Has anyone been using YouTube Music?

      I've gone through quite a few of the music streaming services now. I was on Rdio for a long time until it (sadly) shut down, switched to Spotify for a while, then to Google Play Music, and as of...

      I've gone through quite a few of the music streaming services now. I was on Rdio for a long time until it (sadly) shut down, switched to Spotify for a while, then to Google Play Music, and as of yesterday I have access to YouTube music (which it sounds like is intended to replace GPM before too long).

      From a quick glance at YouTube Music I'm a bit worried—the "library" functionality seems pretty limited, and the search isn't really working as I'd expect. It also doesn't seem to have any connection with my GPM collection or playlists.

      I think it's been out in the US for about a month now, has anyone been using it? Any thoughts on it so far or suggestions about using it?

      9 votes
    41. Anyone want to discuss Hereditary? Please?

      This movie absolutely destroyed me. To be fair, I am very affected by the sadness and trauma of others, so it's not surprising that this movie almost killed me. To borrow from a comment I made on...

      This movie absolutely destroyed me.

      To be fair, I am very affected by the sadness and trauma of others, so it's not surprising that this movie almost killed me. To borrow from a comment I made on another user's post "This movie was a 2 hour long gut punch, and the end was a fever dream." It was so very traumatic, exhausting, uncomfortable, and TERRIFYING. And traditional horror movies do not ever scare me.

      My overwhelming feeling for most of the movie was profound sadness. This family torn apart, the horrible things they say and think... the panic attack that Peter has and when he asks his friend to hold his hand? That was one of the times I actually cried. His numb stupor after his sisters head gets knocked off by a telephone pole(!!!!!). His mother's screams when she finds her headless daughter in the back of the car. The desperation when Steve splashes Annie in the face with water. The two times (one reality, one dream) Annie says just awful things to Peter. Peter smashing his face into the desk. Peter screaming/pleading "Mommy!" as Annie tries to get into the attic after him. These are all times I felt overwhelming sadness. Tons of other feelings: anger, disgust, terror, etc. But huge amounts of sadness that I've never felt during other horror movies.

      Let me preface this by saying I know what the director has said about his vision and "what the movie really means." But I've never cared about a movie enough to actually fundamentally disagree with the person who created it before. self-deprecating eyeroll

      This movie as a straightforward demon-possession/ occult movie does nothing for me. The whole time I had no doubt that it was a family torn apart by mental illness and that devastated and terrified me.

      I'm going to post my inexpert interpretation as a comment. It won't be a synopsis, but there will be oodles of spoilers.

      *Edit: I thought the movie was great. I don't know if I'll ever see it again.

      5 votes
    42. Why do I feel empathetic towards a robot?

      Earlier I saw a post on imgur about how the mars rover has now been carrying out it's mission for almost 15 years, but recently a large dust storm has resulted in NASA being unable to contact the...

      Earlier I saw a post on imgur about how the mars rover has now been carrying out it's mission for almost 15 years, but recently a large dust storm has resulted in NASA being unable to contact the robot at all. Whilst reading the post I felt a sudden sadness for this poor little robot that has been on its own for such a long time and now it can't even communicate with home. I caught myself and wondered why I was feeling such sadness for a electronic device on the other side of solar system.

      One possible explanation I had was that most humans all share a common disliking of the feeling of loneliness, and feel sad for those experiencing that feeling, regardless of whether that thing is human or not. Maybe it's just me, but I feel like a lot of other people also hate to see others in a position of loneliness as I think at some point in everyones life you experience some form of loneliness and therefore know how horrible it is to be in that situation. There's a really good quote by Carl Sagan that sums this up rather nicely: “In all our searching, the only thing we've found that makes the emptiness bearable is each other.”

      Do any of you fellow users occasionally feel bad for robots or have done so in the past, and why? I'm sure I can't be the only one but I'd like to hear other peoples take on the subject.

      16 votes
    43. Change my mind: The world will be better without religion

      Most religions base their beliefs on the Bible. If so, where was the bible based on? Clearly, the bible was written by a bunch of men. Men. Humans. Humans are prone to corruption. We cannot tell...

      Most religions base their beliefs on the Bible. If so, where was the bible based on? Clearly, the bible was written by a bunch of men. Men. Humans. Humans are prone to corruption. We cannot tell whether these authors corrupted or even invented stories? So, why should we base our virtues on a thick book when we don't really know if it's accurate or not?

      Science has already proven that Adam and Eve didn't exist. Evolution does exist. And Science have evidences. The bible said the Earth was FLAT and have 4 corners and sides. Science said the Earth was spherical, and it proved what it said. Science seeks evidence. Science seeks the TRUTH. The bible? It was just created by men many years ago to answer questions they cannot answer.

      There are tons of wars and crusades that were religion driven, whether we had holy wars or wars because of terrorists following inhumane beliefs, many people ultimately died. Just like wars almost eradicated humanity, that is what should happen to be Religion. Become eradicated. Adding on to that we see many deaths every day just because of religious differences.

      The bottom line is, The holy book is repulsive and its repulsiveness creates a huge barrier to development. The world would be a better place without religions. Religions claim themselves right. And because of that, people around the globe were divided by awful beliefs. It's really sad to think that people do good things because they FEARED the awful HELL and because they wanted to go to the fictional HEAVEN. Religious people were driven by a 'holy' book which cannot speak and collect evidences for what it says. We should wake up. Be united by an accurate tool that seeks truth. Science. We should base our virtues on our intelligence and common sense.

      Greek mythology was once a religion, and it flopped and became a myth. Religion in the US is now declining according to surveys. With our eyes, watch and see how will religion disintegrate through the years while the development, peace and stability of the world integrates. To add to my initial statement, I can provide sources for every argument against religion and the "holy book"

      4 votes
    44. Daily book: How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe by Charles Yu

      How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe Charles Yu's debut novel, How to Life Safely in a Science Fictional Universe, could be described as a story about contemporary family life...
                                                   How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe
      

      Charles Yu's debut novel, How to Life Safely in a Science Fictional Universe, could be described as a story about contemporary family life disguised as science fiction. It concerns a young man who has spent most of the past decade in a small time machine in his job as a time machine repairman. He makes calls on people who have rented time machines for recreational purposes but have become stuck in time and must be rescued by him. As the novel progresses, it is revealed that this man's name is the same as that of the author, Charles Yu. The protagonist is a lonely and rather sad fellow, who spends much of his non-working hours drifting along in his capsule, thinking about his past and his parents, especially his father who disappeared long ago. Accompanied only by his dog and a computer that has the pixilated face of a female and a cartoon-like voice, Charles hopes to one day locate his father in some alternate universe to which he apparently has traveled in a time machine. Charles's parents, a few clients, and several street performers are the only other humans that he encounters during the course of the story. He makes one trip to a city in Minor Universe 31, a residential and entertainment world made mostly from a science fiction "substrate," where the company for which he works is headquartered. His objective is to have maintenance work done on his time machine and when he goes to pick it up, he encounters his future self. Panicking, he draws his service revolver and shoots his future self in the stomach, just as his future self is attempting to tell him that the key is the book. He has no idea what this means as he stumbles into his time machine and races away. On the capsule's console, he finds a manual-type book that has the same title as the novel.

      With the help of his computer, he realizes that he must read the book and make amendments and additions to it as he goes along. At some point in the future, he must give the completed book to his past self, who then will shoot him and begin the rewriting process again in an endless cycle. Charles realizes he has become stuck in a time loop. By the rules of time travel, if he changes anything that happens during this loop, he risks entering an alternate universe from which he might not emerge. Under the circumstances, escaping the time loop appears to be extremely difficult. He may be doomed to spend the rest of his life in the time machine, writing the book, giving it to himself, shooting himself, and starting the cycle again. The book is a manual about time travel, but it also offers advice on how such a traveler should live within or use time wisely. The main use of Charles's time is in thinking about his father and mother, but he begins visiting periods in his past in his time machine, watching his younger self interact with his parents. Eventually, he discovers that the book given to him by his future self is literally the key, because it holds a key that unlocks a box that his mother gave him, inside of which his father left clues to where he went in time. This inspires Charles to realize that he can break out of his time loop through the power of his mind and memory. He does so and rescues his father from the past time in which he is stuck. As the novel ends, it looks as if the family has a chance to regain normalcy and move forward with a better understanding of how to cope with the difficulties of life by facing the problems of the past with courage and honesty.

                             Praise
      

      “Glittering layers of gorgeous and playful meta-science-fiction. . . . Like [Douglas] Adams, Yu is very funny, usually proportional to the wildness of his inventions, but Yu’s sound and fury conceal (and construct) this novel’s dense, tragic, all-too-human heart. . . . Yu is a superhero of rendering human consciousness and emotion in the language of engineering and science. . . . A complex, brainy, genre-hopping joyride of a story, far more than the sum of its component parts, and smart and tragic enough to engage all regions of the brain and body.”
      —The New York Times Book Review

      “Compulsively rereadable. . . . Hilarious. . . . Yu has a crisp, intermittently lyrical prose style, one that’s comfortable with both math and sadness, moving seamlessly from delirious metafiction to the straight-faced prose of instruction-manual entries. . . . [The book itself] is like Steve Jobs’ ultimate hardware fetish, a dreamlike amalgam of functionality and predetermination.”
      —Los Angeles Times

      “Douglas Adams and Philip K. Dick are touchstones, but Yu’s sense of humor and narrative splashes of color–especially when dealing with a pretty solitary life and the bittersweet search for his father, a time travel pioneer who disappeared–set him apart within the narrative spaces of his own horizontal design. . . . A clever little story that will be looped in your head for days. No doubt it will be made into a movie, but let’s hope that doesn’t take away the heart.”
      —Austin Chronicle

      “If How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe contented itself with exploring that classic chestnut of speculative fiction, the time paradox, it would likely make for an enjoyable sci-fi yarn. But Yu’s novel is a good deal more ambitious, and ultimately more satisfying, than that. It’s about time travel and cosmology, yes, but it’s also about language and narrative — the more we learn about Minor Universe 31, the more it resembles the story space of the novel we’re reading, which is full of diagrams, footnotes, pages left intentionally (and meaningfully) blank and brief chapters from the owner’s manual of our narrator’s time machine. . . . . Yu grafts the laws of theoretical physics onto the yearnings of the human heart so thoroughly and deftly that the book’s technical language and mathematical proofs take on a sense of urgency.”
      —NPR

      “How to Live Safely is a book likely to generate a lot of discussion, within science fiction and outside, infuriating some readers while delighting many others.”
      —San Francisco Chronicle

      “An extraordinary work. . . . I read the entire book in one gulp.”
      —Chris Wallace, GQ

      “A great Calvino-esque thrill ride of a book.”
      —The Stranger

      “Science and metaphor get nice and cozy in Charles Yu’s How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe. The novel joins the likes of Gary Shteyngart’s Super Sad True Love Story and Jillian Weise’s The Colony, fiction that borrows the tropes of sci-fi to tell high-tech self-actualization narratives.”
      —Portland Mercury

      “A brainy reverie of sexbots, rayguns, time travel and Buddhist zombie mothers. . . . Packed with deft emotional insight.”
      —The Economist

      “A funny, funny book, and it’s a good thing, too; because at its heart it’s a book about loneliness, regret, and the all-too-human desire to change the past.”
      —Tor.com

      “A keenly perceptive satire. . . . Yu’s novel is also a meditation on the essentials of human life at its innermost point.. . . Campy allusions to the original Star Wars trilogy, a cityscape worthy of the director’s cut of Blade Runner and a semi-coherent vocabulary of techno-jargon cement these disparate elements into a brilliant send-up of science fiction. . . . Perhaps it would be better to think of the instructional units of How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe in terms of the chapters of social commentary which John Steinbeck placed into the plot structure of The Grapes of Wrath.”
      —California Literary Review

      “How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe is the rare book I pick up to read the first several pages, then decide to drop everything and finish at once. Emotionally resonant, funny, and as clever as any book I have read all year, this debut novel heralds the arrival of a talented young writer unafraid to take chances.”
      —largehearted boy

      “A wild and inventive first novel . . . has been compared to the novels of Kurt Vonnegut Jr. and Jonathan Lethem, and the fact that such comparisons are not out of line says everything necessary about Yu’s talent and future.”
      —Portland Oregonian

      “Bends the rules of time and literary convention.”
      —Seattle Weekly

      “Getting stuck with Yu in his time loop is like watching an episode of Doctor Who as written by the young Philip Roth. Even when recalling his most painful childhood moments, Yu makes fun of himself or pulls you into a silly description of fake physics experiments. In this way, he delivers one of the most clear-eyed descriptions of consciousness I’ve seen in literature: It’s full of self-mockery and self-deception, and yet somehow manages to keep its hands on the wheel, driving us forward into an unknowable future. How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe is intellectually demanding, but also emotionally rich and funny. . . . It’s clearly the work of a scifi geek who knows how to twist pop culture tropes into melancholy meditations on the nature of consciousness.”
      —io9

      “Funny [and] moving. . . . Charles Yu’s first novel is getting ready for lift-off, and it more than surpasses expectations which couldn’t be any higher after he was given the 5 Under 35 Award . . . How to Live Safely in a Science Fiction Universe is one of the trippiest and most thoughtful novels I’ve read all year, one that begs for a single sit-down experience even if you’re left with a major head rush after the fact for having gulped down so many ideas in a solitary swoop. . . . Yu’s literary pyrotechnics come in a marvelously entertaining and accessible package, featuring a reluctant, time machine-operating hero on a continual quest to discover what really happened to his missing father, a mysterious book possibly answering all, and a computer with the most idiosyncratic personality since HAL or Deep Thought. . . . Like the work of Richard Powers . . . How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe fuses the scientific and the emotional in ways that bring about something new.”
      —Sarah Weinman, The Daily Beast

      “One of the best novels of 2010. . . . It is a wonderfully stunning, brilliant work of science fiction that goes to the heart of self-realization, happiness and connections. . . . Yu has accomplished something remarkable in this book, blending science fiction universes with his own, alternative self’s life, in a way, breaking past the bonds of the page and bringing the reader right into the action. . . . Simply, this is one of the absolute best time travel stories . . . even compared to works such as The Time Machine by H.G. Wells or the Doctor Who television series.”
      —SF Signal

      “Within a few pages I was hooked. . . . There are times when he starts off a paragraph about chronodiegetics that just sounds like pseudo-scientific gibberish meant to fill in some space. And then you realize that what he’s saying actually makes sense, that he’s actually figured out something really fascinating about the way time works, about the way fiction works, and the “Aha!” switch in your brain gets flipped. That happened more than once for me. There are so many sections here and there that I found myself wanting to share with somebody: Here—read this paragraph! Look at this sentence! Ok, now check this out!”
      —GeekDad, Wired.com

      “In this debut novel, Charles Yu continues his ambitious exploration of the fantastic with a whimsical yet sincere tribute to old-school science fiction and quantum physics. . . . A fascinating, philosophical and disorienting thriller about life and the context that gives it meaning.”
      —Kirkus, starred review

      “With Star Wars allusions, glimpses of a future world, and journeys to the past, as well as hilarious and poignant explanations of “chronodiegetics,” or the “theory of the nature and function of time within a narrative space,” Yu, winner of the National Book Foundation’s 5 under 35 Award, constructs a clever, fluently metaphorical tale. A funny, brain-teasing, and wise take on archetypal father-and-son issues, the mysteries of time and memory, emotional inertia, and one sweet but bumbling misfit’s attempts to escape a legacy of sadness and isolation.”
      —Booklist

      “This book is cool as hell. If I could go back in time and read it earlier, I would.”
      —Colson Whitehead, author of Sag Harbor

      “Charles Yu is a tremendously clever writer, and How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe is marvelously written, sweetly geeky, good clean time-bending fun.”
      —Audrey Niffenegger, author of Her Fearful Symmetry and The Time Traveler’s Wife

      “Funny, touching, and weirdly beautiful. This book is awesome.”
      —Nick Harkaway, author of The Gone-Away World

      “How to Live Safely in a Science Fictional Universe is that rare thing—a truly original novel. Charles Yu has built a strange, beautiful, intricate machine, with a pulse that carries as much blood as it does electricity.”
      —Kevin Brockmeier, author of The View from the Seventh Layer and The Brief History of the Dead

      “Poignant, hilarious, and electrically original. Bends time, mind, and genre.”
      —David Eagleman, author of Sum

      4 votes