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12 votes
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Cousin marriage: What new evidence tells us about children's risk for ill health and how governments are responding
23 votes -
Iceland's international reputation for gender equality comes with a striking caveat – new analysis shows about 40% of women have been sexually or physically assaulted, and many are grappling with PTSD
14 votes -
Danish initiative to support mothers with postpartum depression has provided a safe, nurturing environment for women to regain their sense of wellbeing through song
8 votes -
Where can men go to become better men?
36 votes -
Dogs bring loads of joy but also perils on a leash
25 votes -
What toothpaste do you use?
Heavily inspired by last week's thread as well as my recent dental health kick, I'm looking for some toothpaste recommendations. Previously, I used an imported UK version of Sensodyne, because it...
Heavily inspired by last week's thread as well as my recent dental health kick, I'm looking for some toothpaste recommendations.
Previously, I used an imported UK version of Sensodyne, because it was the only way to get the version with novomin. I've run out of that stuff and have started using an interesting toothpaste I picked up from a Japanese store called AcessL from Sato Pharmaceuticals. It's got a unique herbal flavor to it that I like in small bits, but it's not great for my tongue because it's actually pretty salty-flavored, which turns me off of it.
33 votes -
Children under the age of two should not use any digital media, according to new recommendations from Sweden's public health agency
35 votes -
Ok seriously what the fuck do I do
if i chart my life happiness, fulfilment, success over the past four years, the trend is clearly downwards. some clear wins and stretches of improvement, some quite significant, which i am proud...
if i chart my life happiness, fulfilment, success over the past four years, the trend is clearly downwards. some clear wins and stretches of improvement, some quite significant, which i am proud of, but overall, i am getting worse and worse and worse. i attribute my problems mostly to two things: severe social isolation, and an extreme deficit of executive function. however i got here, i'm stuck with the fallout
my memory is bad, and my attention shot, so i kind of don't know what's happened emotionally. i know some focal points, though
this past march, i had a major depressive episode, and it feels like i spent most of a week doing nothing but crying, for no reason at all. i'm not sure how i fed myself
at the beginning of 2022, i quit my (very cushy and chill) job, which i had had for a little over a year at that point, because i felt like i was unmotivated and not actually doing work. (the facts are a bit more subtle; it was partly that the work itself was uninteresting to me, and they wanted to work with me to find something for me to do that i would find more interesting. i was going along with that, until a new opportunity appeared, which i jumped for because i wanted to be able to make a clean break. that opportunity immediately fell through.) i had been living with my parents until shortly before, so i had a lot of savings
now, i find myself in a similar situation, only much more dire. a friend got me a job working with smart people on interesting problems. i have not been doing well. i have been extremely uncommunicative. the pattern is clear: i talk to people, flex my technical chops; they are impressed and like me a lot. then i'm not very productive, and my output slowly deteriorates to nil. i think i just can't do wfh tech work. last week was a blur. i don't know what happened at all. i don't think i've checked slack in close to two weeks, and atp i'm a little bit afraid to. two weeks ago, i asked my friend/coworker to poke me every day to make sure i was doing something. it seemed and still seems like a good strategy. and then a day or two after i asked him that i just dropped off the map again
i'm not addicted to drugs or video games. it seems like i ought to be. i am a bit drunk right now, but that is quite irregular
recently, i thought i'd finally made a close friend. this morning, she broke up with me and blocked me for a really really stupid reason. i am really hurt by that, and it makes me feel a bit hopeless about the whole thing. spent the afternoon crying about it and now just feel a bit numb. i give it decent odds she comes back, but. i know one problem i have is putting my eggs in too few baskets. but there are so few baskets that seem worth investing in, and investment is so hard
she suggested i try to get prescribed add medication for my work problems, and was going to give me some illicitly to see if it helped. the latter is not happening anymore, of course. and i cannot stomach the medical system (already i have other things i have been putting off talking to my doctor about for a while), not to mention that it would take forever to do anything for me
i don't know what to do in the short to medium term. i don't know what to say to my work that i haven't said already, other than: clearly, i am just incapable of doing this. i am not super financially stable right now, and being without a job seems like a bad idea
54 votes -
Teachers, how has Covid-19 affected your students and classes long term?
I only know a handful of teachers personally, and I’m fascinated by their unique perspectives on how the pandemic affected their classrooms. I’m curious how instruction adapted during 2020 and...
I only know a handful of teachers personally, and I’m fascinated by their unique perspectives on how the pandemic affected their classrooms.
I’m curious how instruction adapted during 2020 and 2021 quarantine, how younger or older students were impacted by losing a year of socialization, and other remarkable or surprising changes that came from those years. How did it affect you personally? Were you happier teaching before covid and unhappy with the permanent changes post-pandemic, or vice versa?
My second hand knowledge is mostly from elementary school teachers in the southeast US. I’d love to hear from teachers across all age groups, especially outside the US.
26 votes -
IUD insertion is painful. For the first time, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued guidance for US physicians.
58 votes -
What's a life lesson you've applied that has changed your life?
When I was about 18 years old, I had a philosophy class where the teacher said this quote: "Things over which you do not have power should not have power over you." It could also be read as...
When I was about 18 years old, I had a philosophy class where the teacher said this quote: "Things over which you do not have power should not have power over you." It could also be read as "control the things you control, ignore the rest".
That lesson really spoke to me. I put a lot of effort integrating it into my personality and I must say now, almost 15 years later, it made my life so much more enjoyable.
I used to get mad, really mad about stuff or get stressed about stuff out of my control, and I could never really remove those feelings. These words kept coming back to me and through some effort, I must say that I can more or less apply them in my everyday life now. It saved me a lot of trouble on various situations and has helped me break through problems way faster than I would have in the past, simply by helping me identify the things I could change and focus on those things.
I'm curious about you guys and your life stories. Has any lesson had as much impact on your life?
85 votes -
Perspective request: What would a healthy family do during serious physical/mental health events?
What would your family do? What would a normal, healthy, supportive family do? (If different) Hypothetical situation 1: Two family members have had a major accident. No threat to their lives, some...
What would your family do? What would a normal, healthy, supportive family do? (If different)
Hypothetical situation 1:
Two family members have had a major accident. No threat to their lives, some internal organ damage, some broken bones, not much other info is know. One of them is awake and can call/text for info, the other is in/out of surgeries and in ICU for the first two days.
A) immediately family drops everything and fly to their destination right away?
B) extended family do so?
C) discuss and send one person to go right away. Then discuss to arrange for longer term recovery + rehab care after hospital discharge
D) nothing, combo, or other ?
Hypothetical situation 2:
Family member is "not doing well", eg, mental health. Probably"moderate" level of suicide risk: no immediate plans, some reservations about morality and how devastated their partner would be, but constant ideation and philosophically don't see why not. CPTSD with more recent triggers of job loss and moving from away from a socially unsafe situation. Has entirely dropped out of communication with family. Their partner is reachable by phone or email or text and says the family member is not doing well at all and has ceased all outside of home activities such as getting mail, buying groceries, filling up the car or anything that involves other human beings.
What would a normal family do?
27 votes -
The great deterioration of local community was a major driver of the loss of the play-based childhood
26 votes -
How to deal with (apparent) loss of love?
I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter. Let me clarify that this loss of love...
I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter.
Let me clarify that this loss of love is not due to anyone's death. Perhaps just the same however, since they do not reciprocate your love and warmth anymore, for reasons completely unclear.
The case in point now is this: I'm 25M single and an alone child. I've spent most of my life searching for bondings that nurtured my emotional being. Finding a home for my emotions has been a major theme across different parts of my life. I was lucky enough to be bestowed with a cousin (20F) whom I could meet (at best twice a year, at worst once) and bond over the text otherwise, offering solace and comfort as if from a like-minded sibling. Whenever I needed a sink to pour my love, it was towards her. All was well until I met her yesterday, the meeting for this year (we live continents apart and we know these meetings are limited); I felt I'm distant, and I was invisible on a deeper level to her. Nothing we talked about was related to our well-being as we used to. It was all about the boys in her life, Instagram likes, and other such superficial things. It was as if she didn't know what I care about (I'm not even on IG).
I wasn't sure how to approach this. In general, even with a few friends, I've always had a hard time with an apparent loss of connection. How can you demand love from someone (Rhetorical; one shouldn't)? How should I let them know that the things were better and I want that? I mean nobody can force love. Should I accept (too hard to do) that those bondings have run their course?
Sorry for the emotional dump, and feel free to edit. Thanks for your thoughts.
17 votes -
"Learning to be happier" by Bruce Hood, professor of developmental psychology
10 votes -
The US maternal mortality crisis is a statistical illusion
31 votes -
The emotional support animal racket
26 votes -
An equitable solution to a problem at work regarding sick leave and staffing?
Please bear with me as I'm not terribly sure if this is the right place for this, if I'm phrasing it right, or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. I work at a childcare center - a private...
Please bear with me as I'm not terribly sure if this is the right place for this, if I'm phrasing it right, or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.
I work at a childcare center - a private school marketed as "the best in the area". By most metrics, we are exactly that. I've worked here for nearly 15 years in a variety of roles, namely as a prek teacher for over half of that time. I have a good relationship with my directors and the schools owners, despite some issues in the past (I'm eager to champion more rights and privileges for employees).
This week was the sickest I have been in years, and it was the same for several other staffers as well. We couldn't call in, however, because none of us had fevers, vomiting, or diarrhea (the "big three" for what's acceptable to call in for). We all had flu-like symptoms, though those of us who went to the doctor tested negative for anything. Dozens of students had been getting ill with STREP, Influenza A/B, and Fifths in the weeks prior. It just took its time in reaching the staff!
I co-teach in my class and my co-teacher and I both lost our voices for days. Others had full-body aches, tremendous coughing fits, extreme lethargy... It was terrible. However, almost none of us got the time off that we needed to recover. Why? Staffing. The owners/directors don't want to close a room due to illness, even if both teachers in the room are horrendously sick. I spent days with the kids, barely able to talk or move, just trying to get through the day. My coworkers were the same.
Does that seem right?
The directors/owners essentially picked those who were deemed "sickest" to take a day off. While in the moment I understand that decision, it doesn't seem like a terribly good way to handle it either. I want to bring up my grievances about this with the owners (I already have with the directors, they don't disagree with me but "that's just the way it is") but I also know that showing up with a problem and no solution won't go over well. I also know they don't want to close a classroom at all costs, which is my preferred solution. The last time one was closed was when 5/6 teachers in another room had COVID simultaneously and we were mandated to close the room.
Anyone have any thoughts? Even if it's to show me a side I may not be considering here? Thank you for your insight.
22 votes -
When the US Army uses "enhanced interrogation" on an American soldier
30 votes -
The troubling trend in teenage sex (it's strangulation)
26 votes -
Scammers are targeting teenage boys on social media—and driving some to suicide
27 votes -
This is a teenager
36 votes -
US President Joe Biden just signed the largest executive order focused on women’s health
23 votes -
The life-ruining power of routines: Habits don’t lead to personal optimisation. They lead to suffering.
32 votes -
Daniel Tosh's new podcast - Episode 1 | Interviewing my wife's gynecologist
20 votes -
Who determines Kate Cox’s health care
22 votes -
Inside the world of guide dog dropouts (2019)
26 votes -
A potentially fatal mystery illness in dogs is spreading in the US. It starts with a cough.
52 votes -
This retired pilot went to the hospital but was released subject to legal guardianship of a stranger. Family members were not identified until they found him many months later.
29 votes -
At a Helsinki nursery, children spend all day in the forest – how outdoor learning benefits children's health and teaches them to value nature
25 votes -
A vast northern European project is underway to combat isolation by promoting inclusion – we take a look at the results in Norway
9 votes -
Marriage between cousins and extended family members may soon be banned in Norway
26 votes -
Poland's crusade against abortion investigates miscarriages, tests blood for evidence of abortion pills, created a national pregnancy registry
66 votes -
How Columbia ignored women, undermined prosecutors and protected a predator for more than twenty years
15 votes -
Women who were denied emergency abortions file lawsuits in three states: Lawsuits want to clarify abortion ban exceptions for ‘medical emergencies’ in Idaho, Oklahoma and Tennessee
36 votes -
Abortions rose in most US states this year, new data shows
26 votes -
How often do you brush your teeth?
Following yesterday's question about showering, I was really interested in how often everyone brushes their teeth. I know dentists recommend 1-3 times a day, with once being like "you'll be fine...
Following yesterday's question about showering, I was really interested in how often everyone brushes their teeth. I know dentists recommend 1-3 times a day, with once being like "you'll be fine if you do it properly," and thrice being like "yo, don't brush too hard because you can damage your enamel," but I also know a lot of people do it more than three times a day and I suspect a lot of people do it less than once a day...
I try to do it twice a day...sometimes I miss my evening brushing because one of our cats sleeps in the bathroom so that she has her own space and if the dog (who wants to eat the cats) is already in the bedroom, sometimes I don't feel like escorting him out first. Not great, but at least I'll get it in the morning. And I do sometimes forget in the morning on weekends, but I try to do it as soon as I realize that I've forgotten, and I try to make sure I don't skip nighttime brushing if I forgot to brush in the morning.
37 votes -
How frequently do you shower?
I'm interested to know how often people shower or bathe - but I'd also be interested on your thoughts about other people's frequency. Do you feel strongly about how often one should be cleaning...
I'm interested to know how often people shower or bathe - but I'd also be interested on your thoughts about other people's frequency. Do you feel strongly about how often one should be cleaning themselves, and what factors go into this? I would certainly hope it's reasonably frequent for warm-climate athletes, for example.
65 votes -
You're not traumatized, you're just hurt
20 votes -
Foreskin reclaimers: The ‘intactivists’ fighting infant male circumcision
27 votes -
US 5th Circuit Court of Appeal rejects challenge to Mifeprestone abortion pill’s approval, but upholds some restrictions
20 votes -
Meet the American nomad prepping for doomsday by living in a homemade cart pulled by sheep and drinking their milk | World Wide Waste
20 votes -
Girl, 16, dies after being made to sleep in ‘period hut’ outside her home in Nepal
37 votes -
Looking for short beard and face care tips
I struggle with trichotillomania which is a compulsion to pluck my own hair. Mine is focused primarily on my beard, resulting in unsightly bare patches. I am working through the mental health...
I struggle with trichotillomania which is a compulsion to pluck my own hair. Mine is focused primarily on my beard, resulting in unsightly bare patches. I am working through the mental health component of this condition already, but a better hair and skin care regiment could help reduce the triggers that start me plucking hairs.
I keep my beard relatively close cropped to my face. When the hairs in my bald patches start to regrow there is typically a lot of irritation which starts me touching my face, which leads me to find bumps like zits and blackheads and “weird hairs”, like kinky hairs, hairs growing in the wrong direction, particularly hard or soft hairs, anything that feels off when I run my fingers over them. This has the side effect of depositing more dirt and oils from my fingers onto my face, which creates a kind of feedback loop where the dirtier my face is the more I want to touch it, and the more I touch it the dirtier it gets. When I encounter these bumps and weird hairs I will want to pick at them and I won’t stop thinking about it until I do. It is a real struggle that I am working through and I figure if I can reduce that irritation that triggers it I’ll be less likely to touch and therefore pluck.
What I am hoping to find here are general care tips I can use for my short-cropped beard. What kind of products do you use for both the hairs themselves and your face, what methods do you use to trim, etc.? Currently I wash my face with a cleanser, followed by a toner, then a serum or lotion, but I don’t use any products specifically for my beard hairs themselves. I trim with an electric razor when my beard is between .5 and 1 inches long and I’ll trim it down to about 1/8 of an inch, or whatever setting 7, 8, or 9 is on my razor.
17 votes -
Try Guys try period cramp simulation
40 votes -
Maternal deaths are expected to rise under US abortion bans, but the increase may be hard to measure
18 votes -
What do you look for in a nail salon?
I'm sure most of the nail salon choices near me are fine, but I'm going to have to choose. Are there any red flags I should look for? Are there indications of quality that aren't the same as most...
I'm sure most of the nail salon choices near me are fine, but I'm going to have to choose. Are there any red flags I should look for? Are there indications of quality that aren't the same as most expensive option? Any advice would be helpful.
12 votes -
Has anyone administered fecal microbiota transplant (FMT) to help with their dog's gastrointestinal issues?
I have a cavalier king charles spaniel that has had some unfortunate health issues for the past few years. The most pressing one that I haven't been able to nail down and fix is her GI issues....
I have a cavalier king charles spaniel that has had some unfortunate health issues for the past few years. The most pressing one that I haven't been able to nail down and fix is her GI issues. Every now and then, she has an all night bout of diarrhea even though the only food she has eaten is her hydrolyzed protein dog food. I remember reading about FMT years ago for people who had GI issues and I'm wondering what the results have been for dogs (and other animals). It seems counter intuitive to fight shit with more shit, but at this point I am willing to try most non-invasive treatments. While taking her to the dog park and asking other dog owners if my dog can eat their dog's poo would be the cheapest option, instead I found a site that purportedly has capsules available.
https://doggybiome.com/dog-products-for-diarrhea/
However, because it is difficult to find more information about this company and because I don't want imagine how this type of business (if it worked) could scale up as an industrial factory farm, I am skeptical.
Any thoughts on treating IBD in dogs for an allergy prone, and sensitive dog? She is already getting fiber and she sometimes gets probiotic with her food.
8 votes -
Idaho drops panel investigating pregnancy-related deaths as US maternal mortality surges
83 votes