I was contacted by a recruiter regarding a job in my field but they wanted someone with data analytics skills. I'm taking this as a sign that I should improve my skill set. Does anyone have advice for where or how to start with a very small budget?

Thanks for your help.

I find myself very bored at work. I have nothing on my plate to do, and I have exhausted everything I can think of doing on my phone. Browsing Tildes, and a little reddit though I hate Reddit now, making spreadsheets on Google drive for hobbies, catching up on any news, playing a dumb phone game, watching YouTube (though this is much harder and I can only do something audio based when I sneak away to a private corner which I can only do for limited amounts of time), browsing LinkedIn for other jobs/career path.

I'm at a loss for what else to do. I'm at the point where I have many hours in my day with nothing to do, and boss doesn't care I'm on my phone as long as my shit is done, which it is.

Obviously can't do much video watching or actual video game playing or anything requiring audio.
Also phone games have to be vertical so it isn't obvious I'm playing a game if a client walks in. Any suggestions?

So I get the theory of what they are supposed to do. inform and educate folks on what to do and what not to do.

But my viewpoint on their effectiveness has changed since I learnt about Daryl Davis and Nonviolent Communication, my general appreciation for comedy which touches taboo topic as well as watching a DEI meeting that my workplace had before I started working there.

So my understanding of DEI is that it's aim is broadly to help individuals who may not be aware of the nature of the societal and systemic issue that give people of marginalized society a disadvantage so that we can help prop them up better and therefore put them on an equal footing with the rest of society.

And this is a good idea in theory but I have become more convinced overtime that in reality, it's just not appropriate for the workplace unless it undergoes a major reform because of a general uncomfortableness I have noticed.

When I was watching the DEI meeting that my company had had, the DEI advocate they brought in was talking about the issues faced by racialized individuals (she was at the time specifically referring to black people), and some people shared opinions and one white woman shared her perspective that having grown up in a poor household and being ridiculed for that most of her life as she was growing up, that she thinks that society places too much emphasis on helping out racial minorities when its actually people's socioeconomic status that is an indicator of how disadvantaged they are.

And the DEI advocate just did her best to dismiss that opinion and quickly get back to her slides.

And as I was watching this, I got really disappointed. If there is one person who should be trained in how to have those sorts of uncomfortable conversations about how best to tackle handle the issues of racial discrimination vs being unable to provide for yourself in a capitalist society, I really would have expected the DEI advocate to be perfect for such a discussion.

Instead she just stuck to her slides.

She was unable to engage with someone who had a different perspective in a respectful way.

and it got me thinking, let's say I was a bigot or a misogynist. I did think my black colleagues were just diversity hire or that I have a bias against women. I doubt I will be convinced by the cookie cutter slides they present at the DEI meetings why I am wrong and I know that if I voice my opinion, I will be shunned and shamed which leads to me just ignoring the DEI information and not taking anything in and therefore the DEI meetings are just a waste of time.

So what's the point?

I get the argument that if they allow those kinds of uncomfortable discussions at work, it can create tension and can cause a hostile work environment but then, all the company is doing with DEI is pretending to be solving the issue when in fact its just masking the issue and the people who disagree are just gonna continue disagreeing and maybe even double down more cause they're being actively told they are backwards rather than someone having a conversation with them.

The other day I had to get new glasses, and I braced myself for my lenses to be incredibly thick and expensive to boot again - but then I had them made, they look normal, and they barely cost me a Benjamin. Clearly, the optometrist crowd has made some major developments in the past decade or so, which leads me to ask - if you're working in an industry most people don't really think about, what's happened in your space in the past ten years?

I am at the end of a phase of my life in which for many years, finding contract work was as simple as contacting 5 or 6 people and letting them know I was available. This work is no longer tenable for me and I am attempting a career transition.

Edit: I wasn't sure whether to mention, but over the last 10 years I have come to suspect that I have undiagnosed ADHD. Any advice from that perspective would be greatly appreciated.

Asking people with more recent experience than me, what methods do you use to job hunt? How do you manage your time while unemployed? If you are willing, would you please share advice?

I don't know what I intend for this post to be - I guess I just need to get my thoughts out somewhere. If anyone has any advice, I'd appreciate it - but I'm not expecting anyone to read all the way through this or anything really. If this isn't appropriate for Tildes, feel free to remove it.

I recently graduated college and moved to San Jose, CA for work. And let me tell you, I am not liking it here at all so far. Work itself is great - it's interesting stuff, I like what I'm doing, and I feel like there's really nowhere else I could be doing it. But dear lord, has my social life evaporated. This does not feel like somewhere that someone in their young 20s should be living. I live in downtown, and it's mostly apartments, tech companies, and a spattering of bars and restaurants frequented by tech bros in their 30s. Which is fine, but not at all the social scene I am looking for.

I work with a handful of people my age, and while we do things outside of work every so often, they're really not the same kind of folks I got used to hanging out with in college. They're all super career/status-oriented people, which is not me at all. I've definitely selected for meeting these kinds of folks by working at a tech company, but that's really not the kind of people I usually vibe with. In college, I made a lot of really close friends who were mostly "weirdos", without any better way to put it - lots of queer leftist folks, people into strange art and music, people I could really be myself around. Maybe I have high standards for what I look for in friends, but I really do not see myself becoming close with any of the people my age that I've met around here so far. I have nothing against these folks - we just share different ideals. But I feel like I am constantly censoring myself and am unable to really just be me here.

Of course, to find the kinds of people that I want to hang out with, I probably chose the wrong career path and wrong place to live. I was wary of moving to San Jose since the sentiment I'm sharing here is widely echoed online. And it feels bad proving my fears correct. I looked into moving to San Francisco, Berkeley, or Oakland, but decided against it because I was afraid the commute would burn me out. But now, I am regretting that decision hardcore. I have never felt lonelier in my entire life. I would much rather spend three hours commuting every day than spend my weekends alone.

I started adulthood during the pandemic, and I moved out of state to go to college. For the first two years of school, I had a really hard time meeting people and making friends since my university was really strict on COVID restrictions, and we didn't have in person classes until halfway through my second year. That part of my life was really lonely, too - so this isn't new to me. But somehow, being surrounded by people who are nothing like me feels way lonelier than being around nobody at all. And what hurts even more is seeing all of my friends back in college / high school thriving, and feeling like I'm drowning. I feel like I sold my friends and happiness for a job and money, and it feels terrible. Nobody I knew from college or high school lives here - I had zero connections moving up here.

And this isn't for a lack of effort - I've been trying to figure out where to meet people. I've looked at meetup, and all the events around here seem to be networking, business, and tech related. I've gone on Bumble BFF, and everyone on there just wants to "network" or aren't my vibe. I've been going to bars, coffee shops, etc by myself to try and meet people, but haven't been successful. I've signed up to volunteer at a local animal shelter, which I figure might be a good way to meet people, but they don't have any open shifts yet. I've looked for live music events near me, but there isn't really a lot in the scenes I'm into. I don't know what else to do.

Everything in this place seems to revolve around careers, money, status, networking, and tech. It feels terrible, it's like a physical microcosm of LinkedIn. I know I'm going to be moving to San Francisco as soon as my lease is up in August. I feel like I'll have a way better chance of meeting people who are like me and are my age up there. But in the meantime, I need to make the most of where I am. I'm sure there's people like me somewhere around here, but the issue is meeting them. Where do I find them? How the hell do adults make friends, and close ones at that? I am surrounded by a lot of lonely adults - lots of folks at work who never married, don't do anything fun, and live for work. Do I need to get out of here before this place eats me alive? I don't want to end up like that.

I know this will pass, or at least I hope it does. I know my life isn't over. I just feel like I'm squandering my precious 20s, if there is such a thing. At least I have a roof over my head and a dream job. I guess the grass is always greener, but I feel like I'd rather be struggling to pay rent and be surrounded by close friends than have a full wallet and an empty living room like I do now. The pandemic was a really terrible period of my life, and I won't go into detail about everything going on in my brain, but I feel like I'm standing on the precipice of that kind of depression again.

Anyway, this post isn't really coherent or organized. It's more of a rant than anything. I just needed to get my thoughts on to paper (screen?), and posting here seemed better than screaming into the void. If you read this, thank you :)

EDIT: Wow, I didn't expect so many replies, recommendations, and support on this post. I fully expected to get no replies. Thank you everyone, really. I suppose part of my situation is I need to stop being so negative - while I am genuinely unhappy here, this isn't forever and I can't do anything besides keep trying. If nothing else, I can always move in August (or before then, if I can figure out a way to break my lease without emptying my bank account). Until I move or find connections, I'll get good at enjoying my own company. And I'm also eternally grateful to have made amazing friends in college and High School that I can still talk to, even if they're hundreds of miles away.