Well, I have a lot of stuff going on.

In May, I graduated with my Bachelor's degree in Computer Science. That was good, and I was glad to do so. After that I took a short well deserved break. It feels so good not to have to go to class and listen to a lecture from a lecturer who doesn't want to be there.

Now that I have my degree, I need to find a job that uses that degree. (or any thing remotely related) That may sound simple enough, but it is tough.

I don't know what I want to do with my degree. That's hard for me to say, but it's true. Like I have always been looked at as someone who was "smart" and "had it together" or "had a straight path". Very much not. Anyway, I don't know what all that degree qualifies me for. I know it opens me up to the development field. I did a lot of programming through college and between, but it's not something I really enjoy. I am not particularly bad at it. It just not something I really want to be doing 100% of the time all the time. Then there is the IT field. I am not so sure where I really would like to go in IT though. Support is not really an ideal place for me. I am terrified of the idea of having to talk on a phone. I can do in person support better. Then there is infrastructure. I am kinda interested in infrastructure, but it is huge. I don't even know what to look for in that area. I am just a kid with a CS degree, I don't have this figured out.

I live in the middle of nowhere. or at least it feels like it (rural central Arkansas) You have to really look at the next city over for anything. Even then most things I see are out of the capital. There is nothing bad about any of this. I got my degree in the next city over, drove there every day. The capital is only 40 - 50 minutes away.

It feels like everyone wants to see experience. Either directly or indirectly. This is hard for me. I don't have any professional experience at all. I have some personal projects I have worked on. I do have those listed in my resume. I don't feel that helps that much. I spent my time getting that degree, not working.

Family is troublesome. In many many ways. They are always like "you need to get a job", "have you found anything yet", "are you filling out a job application". Like please leave me alone about this. I am doing what I am doing. You don't have to know every single thing about me. I am me, not you. Troublesome and frustrating. Another thing is they are stuck in the past. Two of them are going deaf. One of them is nuts, and does not know how to respect privacy at all. Its a lot. It leaves me with an annoying bootstrapping problem I have to solve. I still live with my parents, with my grandparents next house over. I have to get a place that is away from family. To do that I need to get a job. To really look hard, and even want to do so and not just do some and get frustrated, I need to get away from family. There are solutions. Just go elsewhere and look for stuff. Not easy when they always want to know where you are all the damn time. Always wanting you to keep them updated and know where you are. I have a few tricks, location services is very inaccurate when wifi is turned off. I also can just say "I am going somewhere", and when they ask more I just say "I am 23 blooming years old". Not the kind of trouble I want to go through all time. Family is frustrating. Even more so, when you are an introvert and just want to be alone for a while. When you get into actually doing something, they come to you to ask about something. "do you know where this [item] is?", "I need you to do this [task]". It's like they can sense when you are actually focus or are just vibing or actually happy. They go on and complain that you snap at them. When they were the ones that were interrupting a rare moment of focus, or appear out of nowhere. Annoying to say the least. Never the one to actually win. By default, "I am older and know more then you", "I gave birth to you". Saying I am in trouble when I do nothing wrong. Like when I got in trouble for going to my grandparents house early in the morning during the summer. Lost all trust that summer. Or when I shared some cinnamon rolls that I bought with my grandparents. Got into trouble for not bringing my parents any. It was just a kind gesture and I am made to feel like I don't care about anybody over it. Troublesome and difficult.

If you just read all that, thanks. I promise I am decently put together in real life. That is rawer then I would usually like to put out.

So far I still don't have a good title for this post so I guess I'll just add some more.
I have not found anything yet. I have not applied to many places yet. I did apply to a regional ISP and got an interview, but was rejected for lack of work history to show I can deal with phone support, and for potential lack of clarity. I applied to a local audio cable manufacturer, but was caught by ats or lack of checking. Actually applied to their website for that one. I have asked some of the local Facebook groups "who was hiring locally in CS / IT fields". I got a few responses from it. A pyramid scheme. Someone who would look at their employer. They didn't have anything open, but at least they have my information now. Someone who is likely looking more so for a general laborer then an IT person. I still kinda want to hear them out, but they still haven't said anything else to me. I have brushed up my LinkedIn. I have also signed up for more accounts then I would have liked. I have talked with a local employment agency, but I don't think they will find anything like what I am looking for.

Well, its a process, and I am just at the beginning. If you do have any advice for my job search I would be glad to read it.

TLDR: Dotz graduated and is looking for a job, then rants about family.

As some of you on here may know, I was made redundant from my Assistant Commercial Reporting Analyst job three months ago and have been struggling to find permanent work since. Many of my interactions with recruiters and hiring managers have been negative and have felt like they were wasting my time, but one particular (ongoing) experience has taken the cake.

In mid-April, I applied for an Assistant Client Accountant position through LinkedIn. The role was with a large property management and building consultancy firm (offices based in the UK & France), who have some pretty big-name clients. Fully office-based, advertised pay between £25k - £29k (already similar payscales to what credit control and purchase ledger roles near me are offering), and the position ideally asked for fully AAT qualified or ACCA part-qualified candidates (I have full AAT membership, am 3 exams into my ACCA, and have over 6 years experience in previous accounting and financial reporting roles.)

Nine weeks later, I am still going through this application process which has been nothing short of a shitshow:

• It has taken multiple weeks to schedule and conduct interviews for each stage, due to unanswered emails and heavily delayed responses from both the Finance and HR teams. I had emailed on nine separate occasions to schedule the the second and third stage interviews I was invited to, and only twice did I get replies. At first I was told it was due to staff sickness, but then the trend of replying in business weeks just kept going on, even after the third-stage (which I'll get to.)

• The first stage interview was a 15 - 30 minute phone interview going through my CV and salary expectations. Stages 2 and 3 involved a series of hour-long competency based interviews, one conducted via Teams and the other in-person with the Head of Finance. This is already a ridiculous number of hoops to jump through for an office-based role with this salary level.

• During the third-stage interview (3rd June) I was asked a lot of supervisory/leadership questions which I honestly didn't expect. It made me question whether I was being interviewed for the correct role, so I checked the job description of what I applied for. Only 4 of the 590 words contained within the job advert even alluded to me leading junior colleagues - so maybe it was easily missed?

• On the 5th June (two days after my third-stage interview), I received an email from HR thanking me for accepting the Client Accountant position and asking me to confirm RTW (right-to-work) details. The thing is... I never received an offer letter, and after immediately chasing this up I found out the email was sent to me by mistake. This HR rep apologized and said they'd chase feedback. I emailed twice to chase this feedback and promised it would be coming.

• Today when I emailed again to chase feedback, the HR advisor responded to raise concerns about the salary expectations I communicated in the first stage, insisted the role actually paid £26k at most and asked me to confirm a salary within their range. This is false (I know, I actually double-checked the job ad and even did a screen recording on my mobile of me going into the LinkedIn app and opening the job posting) and I get the impression that they're now trying to lowball me. I emailed again asking for clarification where I linked the job ads and I get the feeling they confused the salary bands with a Purchase Ledger role I applied for several months prior but was not considered for.

I will find out Monday (after nearly three weeks) if I was successful in my application, but even if they offer me the job at a reduced salary rather than outright reject me, I am already seeing a shitload of red flags.

At this point I've had enough. Normally I'd cut my ties and move on but with how desperate I've been for work and how much I feel like this company has taken me for a ride, I feel the need to take things further. Not sure whether I should (or even could) formally raise a complaint, drop some negative feedback on their Glassdoor page, or go public (with receipts) and openly name & shame the company on LinkedIn, Facebook or Instagram. The latter options feel like I'd be going nucelar and as cathartic as it would be, I'm worried it would be seen as unprofessional and hurt my future job prospects.

What would be the best way to proceed?

MLMs = "multi-level marketing" companies, which is essentially a euphemism for "pyramid scheme." These are flat out illegal in many countries, but are, notably, quite legal in the US.

They used to be huge in the 2010s, but I don't hear much about them anymore (granted, I haven't been on social media since 2016). I know several IRL people who got into them, and I even regrettably bought products from some of them before I really understood what they were or how they worked.

I recently read Hey, Hun by Emily Lynn Paulson who was toward the top of the pyramid at Rodan + Fields.

In the book she mentions that algorithmic changes from social media companies ended up downgrading a lot of MLM postings, which cut off oxygen to the cycles of recruitment that these companies rely on. For example, Rodan + Fields moved to an affiliate model in 2024.

I'm curious about what the MLM landscape looks like right now.

• Are MLMs still common?
• For those of you on social media, do you still get recruitment and sales messages?
• Have they changed their tactics or models?

People don't have to limit responses to just those questions -- consider this a general MLM discussion topic where anything related to them is fair game.

Hi all, hoping you might be able to help me. This seemed like the closest Tildes category to post in. Maybe a year ago, I noticed I had tracked something into my apartment on my shoes and it left gunk on the floor. I cleaned as best I could and most of it came off but one major spot stained. Everything I tried wouldn't take it off. Over the last year it darkened and is the darkest spot in the photo.

I was never able to clean it off or figure out exactly what I got stuck on my shoe to cause it. Until a couple days ago when it happened again. And eventually I put two and two together. There's some type of tree that drops some kind of nut or seed near the parking area and when I walk to my trunk after parking I accidentally stepped in one which smushed into my shoe and tracked into the apartment. I don't know what kind of tree or seed it is, but that's what stained it.

Now that it's happened again it's even worse and I cannot for the life of me clean this off. I have tried 409, rubbing alcohol, Goo Gone, bleach, hydrogen peroxide and nothing cleans this crap off more than it is in the photo. Even scrubbed it with a sponge scrub pad and nothing. It's a smooth surface so it's not like a chunk I can scrape off, it's just like stained the laminate floor.

Any suggestions on what else I can use to clean this gunk once and for all without damaging my apartments floor?

Thanks! Here's the photo: https://imgur.com/a/pQ5hw36

That is it. Just a personal post, a personal story, or a useless rant. You decide. Everyone knows men are bad at friendship. I know I am bad at friendship. There seems to be an invisible wall around each man. I had the hurtful experience of learning that some friendships are transactional. They last as long as both parties have something to gain from each other.

Many years ago, certainly more than a decade, I met this young fellow at a production van for a film we were both working on. He was a low-level production assistant; I was a script supervisor. He was an aspiring writer and learned that I was a screenwriter. I offered to teach him what I knew about screenwriting for free. I was a student myself, so it didn’t make sense for me to charge for lessons. He came to my house a few times, and I told him everything I knew. Loglines, storylines, outlines, structure, format. The works. It was awesome.

For many years he sent me his originals (usually short stories), which I reviewed diligently, as others had done for me in the past. One day, after reading one of his stories, I told him something along the lines of "You have surpassed me and I have nothing left to teach you. I will still read your stuff if you want, but now you will read my stuff as well because I want your advice." And I meant it.

Years passed, and we no longer read each other’s originals. I don’t know why; it just happened. He still visited me regularly, especially for lunches and dinners with my family (as Brazilians, the dividing line between family and friendships is either thin or nonexistent).

COVID happened, taking a slice of everyone’s personal history. I moved out of the family home, got married, had a kid. In the meantime, he sent me a message asking for help. He was depressed, paranoid, scared to leave the house. I visited him the next day and gave all the advice I had accumulated from being a psychiatric patient for the last 20 years or so.

After that I occasionally sent him messages asking how he was. Sometimes he answered. When my son was born, I sent him a picture and asked him to come visit. He responded but never came. I kept inviting him, making it clear that it was important for him to be a part of my life in that new phase. I invited him to the first birthday of my son. He answered with an emoji. He didn’t come. The last message I sent him was two weeks ago. Seen. No response.

He has an online presence, and I can see that he takes part in multiple social events related to his career as a writer. Book launches, lectures, online talks, academic events. Surrounded by people, calmly smiling and perfectly content. There are videos for a lot of that stuff.

Although the last time we talked he was emphatic that he was much better and able to work, it is conceivable that he is unwell. But it is hard to reconcile that with the fact that he seems quite capable of socializing with everyone except me.

Everyone, it seems, who is instrumental to his career. Which I no longer am.

That fucking hurts.

Is this just something men do? Is he scared of catching fatherhood from me like it's the flu? Is this an expression of his ideas of masculinity?

I'll never know because he doesn't answer, and if he did, he would never talk about that because men don't talk about anything that matter.

When I won my first grant as a screenwriter 18 years ago, I hired him as an assistant and we traveled together to a remote location where I thought I would be able to concentrate on my writing. He was supposed to help me and he did, even if a lot of what he did was just talk to me all day. That probably helped more than anything he could do in regard to the actual writing. And now I am asking myself, was that wonderful friendship-building experience just a paycheck for him?

I am ending this. I am ending this even if he does not realize. That is incredibly demeaning and I feel tired. Whatever the reason for him drifting apart, it is not for me to resolve. If someday he finds a reason to reach out, even if it is transactional in nature, I will be there for him. For now, I must say, it's goodbye, old friend.

Hello everyone! I had a realization recently spurred by ongoing work stress that my partner is going through. I don't think I'm really good at providing comfort to people.

For one, I always feel very awkward when people other than close friends or romantic partners open up to me. I never quite know what to say. Something like "there there. I'm sorry you're going through that" feels really trite and rehearsed. However the other mode that I have is problem solving, which most people don't appreciate when they're going through something hard.

Secondly, I have this internal feeling about constantly providing comfort for the same thing over and over forming a sort of codependency. I went through this with a previous long term relationship. She hated her job, she would come home, cry, I'd do my "there there" thing, she'd cheer up just enough to force herself through another day, and the cycle would repeat ad nauseum. At a certain point it began to feel like I was enabling a sort of self-harm, and I was bearing much of the fallout from that self-harm. Her job would make her miserable, she'd make me miserable, eventually I'd bear enough of that misery for her to make herself miserable again. Would it have been better to just put my foot down, say I'm no longer going to comfort you for this job that is stealing all of your joy, and I will help you fix this problem, but I won't continue to soothe the pain it causes you? Maybe, but I don't know if I could bring myself to do that. Also, what happens if it's a problem without a solution? What if it's a problem that most people deal with, and you just need to sort of build emotional resilience to deal with?

I don't know the answers to these questions, and I'm not sure if anyone really does for sure, but I'm curious how other people feel about comforting people. What strategies have worked for you? Does it feel awkward? Is it something you've consciously worked on? Do you believe there's such a thing as too much comfort? Even for the people you love?

I understand that fast fashion brands aggressively cut costs to mass-produce as much trendy clothing as possible, so I'm not surprised when I see a low quality fast fashion item. However, what is surprising to me is that the clothes actually significantly vary in quality, even within the same brand. So in a fast fashion store you may find a garment made from the worst synthetic blend ever, with messy stitches that'll definitely tear apart after a single wash cycle. And then on the same shelf there'll be a fairly well-made item, from a sturdy natural fabric, with very precise seams and details. And oftentimes, those two garments will be sold at the same price point.

How does this happen? Do the fast fashion brands just randomly decide to spend more money on some of their clothes? Why don't they just make all of their clothes equally low-quality to cut costs, or make them all a bit better to increase satisfaction? How can a single company have such different quality standards for different products?

I recall this thread https://tildes.net/~health.mental/1l62/adhd_diagnoses_are_surging_among_older_americans that I responded to in January, 2 months after my diagnosis, but about 3 weeks before I started medication. At the time, I was "self-medicating" with cannabis every weekend and I did implement positive changes, but I knew I needed something for the week and I knew I didn't want to smoke every day or take cannabis every day.

The medications

I started using Vyvanse in late January, after my diagnosis was confirmed in October, but my doctor wanted to wait for my heart results because I had consulted about my heart many many years before and it was the only thing I could answer to her when she asked me: "any past problems about your body?". In retrospect, she did well, because I now realize that most ADHD drugs are stimulants.

Anyways. My first day on Vyvanse was absolutely I N S A N E. I felt like I was the guy from Limitless taking NZT for the first time. It was like all my mind clutter got removed at once. Normally, I felt like I was losing frames every second, but with Vyvanse, I felt focused, every discussion I had that day, I was fully focused. Everything I had to do that day, or wanted to do, I did. I'm a teacher and there are TONS of stuff we need to do that is not really talked about, stuff like printing papers, organising papers for my groups (I'm in high school), reorganising my desks because someone messed with them, and so much little planning for different projects, future exams, future classes. Most of those things include some sort of planning with others, which can lead to a long list of things to do that just never ends. Well, that day, I did everything I needed to do and I felt like I wasted zero time with everything. I was efficient, quick, did all my tasks and more. I was used to doing thing fast, but I was maybe ~80-85% efficient most of the time. Well, with Vyvanse, I was at 120%. That lasted for a couple of days... and then the side effects started to really pile up.

I have insomnia, trouble staying asleep, I always wake up during the night and was also diagnosed with sleep apnea last year. So, insomnia coupled with stimulants was just not a good combo. I was not sleeping at all, probably getting 1-3 hours of sleep for multiple days in a row. My heart was often racing very much, often times at non-usual hours, such as at like 3 am...

I was super happy with the positive effects, it was exactly what I needed. I was able to start routines I had wanted to start for years, such as cooking, cleaning, planning, exercising, etc. I was able to do all that, but my heart racing and my lack of sleep really took a toll on me.

So I went to see my doctor, we tried Concerta for about a month and a half, but it did just nothing. It was maybe 15-20% of what Vyvanse was AND it still affected my heart, while not helping my insomnia. So I went back to my doctor.

We then tried Strattera. Oh boy, did Strattera work. I started it around early April and it's exactly what I needed. It's about 85-90% of the positive effects that Vyvanse had, while having close to zero side effects. I'm prepared to be on Strattera for the rest of my life. I'm on 40mg now and I don't need to up the dose, but through the years, I could go as high as 120mg, so there is room to keep the same effects for many many years.

How it changed my life

I must state that I'm in my early 30's. I've been living alone all my adult life. I had wanted to make positive changes in my life for years. I wanted to cook more, I wanted to exercise more, to organize my life, to decorate my apartment, to improve everything about my life. I had the willpower, my body just didn't follow. So, in that sense, the medication was just the final push before implementing everything in my life.

I had already started to make positive changes when I used cannabis during Fall 2024. Every weekend, I would write up a list, smoke a joint and go to work. I just wanted to be able to do that during my work week because, obviously, pot is not an ADHD drug and I couldn't be high all the time.

I can confidently say that Strattera and the medications just completely changed my life. Yes, I implemented every "positive life changes" you can think of. My life is organized, I can keep agenda updated, I can easily plan needed appointments, I follow-up on people when I tell them too. Remember all the times you've told people "oh yeah, I'll do that later!" and didn't follow up? Well, now I do follow up every time. I have planned my whole summer (yeah, teacher vacation!) easily... the list just goes on.

Being organized helped me in myriad of ways, in fact, it helped me use cannabis for (what I think is meant to be used) creativity. Now, I smoke a joint every Sunday, when all my chores are done, and I just think about creative projects I have always had and I work towards them, but it's mostly just thinking and writing some of it down. I made huge progress in a fantasy story I had in mind for years. I made huge progress in planning some class changes I wanted to implement next years; stuff like changing the desks configuration, offering benefits for work, changing the work style of my students, etc. And you know what? I'm thrilled to work towards that. I have some camping planned this summer where I plan to go alone and just think about that stuff in nature.

Anyways.

The biggest change is honestly just being able to switch from a short-term, adrenalin-energy-based life, to a long term life. I'm hopeful towards the future, because I know I'll be able to see my projects come to fruition. Even if it takes 10 years, I know I can do the work. I understood that, ultimately, life is work. There is stuff you just need to do. I cannot just not do the dishes, I cannot just not pick up after myself. I cannot just not take out the trash. But now, my brain is not tuned around maximizing short-term dopamine, my brain is now tuned around maximizing overall happiness, so I can do that "needed" stuff, while doing everything else while not being more tired than I was before.

I can just be the man I have always wanted to be. I always wanted to help people, to love people. Every other weekend, I go see my sister and help her with her house. Sometimes, I work like 7-8 hours a day, and I'm happy to do it.

Don't get me wrong, I still have time in my week where I have leisure time: I game about 10-14 hours every weekend, I surf reddit and youtube ~2-3 hours every day, but I just plan those moments better and end up enjoying them more, honestly. Every time I meet up with my friends, I fully enjoy it. It's not like I'm "no, sorry, gaming is not productive, so I won't do it." It's more like "yes, I can game freely now!".

Anyways, thank you for reading me, I just wanted to share my experience and I hope you'll free yourself from the judgement/negativity around being diagnosed/medicated with ADHD. If you think you might have ADHD, go to a doctor. Once I reached for help and got my diagnosis, it absolutely completely changed my life for the better. My only regret is not going to the doctor earlier, but I didn't, because "everyone has ADHD", yeah.

after being with my gf for a while, its become very clear to me that she really appreciate a massage. part of it is just its her love language and part of it is just that her back tends to have issues.

I'm at a place where I wouldn't necessarily be opposed to taking some massage classes to provide her a better experience but I don't really have the time for classes and I am in massive saving mode right now and classes don't seem cheap.

So the next best thing seems to be get some adequate massage tools that couples can use without much expertise but quite frankly, I don't really know what qualifies as a "good massage tool". I was wondering if anyone here has gone down that hole and would be willing to share their experience?

to give you more context on where the tool[s] would be used, she tends to like a massage on the left or right side of her back, not really much in the shoulder area and maybe a little above the bum but not much tbh.

oh and she likes it when I use my knuckles or elbows.

For me it's:

Pants below the natural waist. What can I say, I grew up during the Britney Spears' Time.

Long socks with shorts. Also, invisible socks, apparently I just hate crew or 1/4 crew socks.

ADDENDUM.
This popped up in my feed I see that no one has defended capri pants, yet...I like how at some point in society, a "cupped" clothed ass was considered so provocative.

So. I have what I'm sure is not a unique problem, but sure is an interesting one.

The people who built my house built the foundation wrong. Instead of digging a hole, then digging a deeper trench for a foundation, which insures the foundation is on compacted soil, they made a mold around the edge of the hole. Then put some sand on top.

As you can imagine, 60 years of settling has resulted in my foundation kind of sitting on tiny plateaus of compressed sand, and those plateaus are slowly eroding away. Especially in this one spot where there was water seeping in because they also did the grade wrong.

So anyhow, my understanding is that the best solution is to add a bunch of fill dirt into the 5ft "luxury crawlspace," compressor, and repeat until the dirt is at least level with the foundation footer. To the tune of approximately 60 cubic yards.

As you can imagine, this is an awful lot of dirt. And the only entrance to my crawlspace is a 10sqft hole at the back of the house, far from where dirt could be delivered.

How the hell am I supposed to do this? I feel like the most cost-effective way would be to have the exterior wall and floor of one bedroom ripped off so that the dirt can be pushed/poured directly in, and then an army of assistants spreads out the mess.

I'm sure I could ask a contractor (and will given scope of work), but I'm trying to get a rough feel for the work required so I know if I'm being completely ripped off.

Apologies if I've chosen the wrong topic for this one. My request is broad, so I'm not sure where it should go. Could have fit into an "education" topic, but that doesn't exist so… 🤷‍♂️

I stumbled onto the Manga Guide to Databases, and I'm having a lot of fun reading through it. It's reminded me of other media that is explicitly designed to teach a topic in a fun way. A few examples that stand out:

• The Little Schemer (book)- Teaches recursion in a really intuitive way through a narrative.
• Go! Go! Nippon! ~My First Trip to Japan~ (game)- Teaches you about Japan and Japanese culture through a visual novel.
• How Heavy Are the Dumbbells You Lift? (anime/manga)- Does more storytelling than teaching, but there's still a fair bit of teaching in here about how to get started working out

I really enjoy this kind of media, and I'd like to find more of it. What other media have you found that fits this description? Topic and medium doesn't matter as long as the delivery is effective. I don't even care if the media seems designed explicitly to teach the topic or if learning is just a pleasant side-effect of engaging with it.

Hello tilderinos! I'm currently on the hunt for a new job, and it's been a very long time since I've had to do any kind of real interviewing to compete for a position. I'm looking for some general tips and, if anyone is experienced in the field of education, tips specific to teacher interviews.

My strengths in interviews are that I'm generally a confident speaker, I know my field well, keep pace with recent developments, and have an enormous amount of experience to draw from.

My weaknesses are that I tend to ramble (adhd!), I lose track of multi part questions (adhd strikes again!), and I'm terrible at quickly recalling specific examples from my mountain of experience. I also feel that, especially when interviewing for positions a bit outside my experience (Eg a 2nd grade teaching position) I come across as naive at best and ignorant at worst.

I also generally have a hard time selling myself with words. I'm very much a man of action, and would love to demonstrate my skill firsthand, but that isn't terribly easy to do in an interview setting.

I hope this topic isn't too selfish of me and I appreciate any feedback I get! Thank you all.

I have grown fond of this community. But I can’t help but feel sad that I lack this connection in my flesh life.

So, how would I meet you out in the world ? When I wrack my brain I can only imagine I’d meet some of you at school, or in some cases, work ?

I don’t even know how to tell someone to meet me lol. I am pretty encouraging, so I guess if you just even make a tiny mention you want me to take interest, I will. I have met friends playing sports and in school and working. And online.

Tell us something you’re proud of.

Celebrate your successes! Pat yourself on the back!

Bragging about yourself is not only allowed but encouraged in this topic.

If you’re naturally humble and don’t know what to say: pretend like this is a job interview and you have to sell everyone here on your strengths and successes.

After my last post on procrastination, it got me wondering what are successful strategies that are used by other Tilders to keep their lives on track.

When I was in university and needed to get myself on track to graduate after a bad year of school, I adopted the Getting Things Done methodology which worked great for me then, but I didn't find myself applying it as consistently post graduation.

I've been reading Atomic Habits lately as I want to improve my own habits, but I'm also thinking about a more general "how I want to organize my life" and be more proactive on managing things.

Are you a user of to-do lists, calendar reminders, sticky notes, or something less conventual? I'm interested in hearing about it.

I'm writing this as a way to, I guess, journal my thoughts but also share my experience, here's hoping it makes an interesting read. Sorry in advance if this feels disjointed or disorganized, I'm writing as I go.

So for those of you that don't know, today there was a massive blackout in Iberia and some regions of France, and it was a total blackout. Over 60 million people were affected.

The causes are still unclear, but it appears that it was due to a rare meteorological event that took out a high voltage line. This line distabilized all of the grid and took out the power. As far as we know, there was no cyber attack or anything of the sort.

Anyway, here's how things went down for me.

Today I woke up at 8:00 in the morning, went to work as usual. In my office, we had a completely normal morning as usual. But then, around 11:30, power goes out. Our monitors stopped working, lights shut down, ventilation system turned off, the whole shebang.

I thought, "just another blackout, should come back any moment". But then, my colleague sitting on my side, was on a call with someone in Porto - we were in another city - and that the power there was also out. (our wifi had UPS, so we had internet for a while).

While very rare, it actually wasn't the first time that this happened. Last year we had an outage that took out several regions in Portugal. So I thought, "again? Weird."

People started talking to each other, calling friends and family to ask them if they also had the outage. And sure enough, all of them did. Soon enough we started to find out that even Lisbon and Algarve were missing power, so it was a national outage.

Cellular data still worked, I started refreshing all the news websites that I knew of and checking r/portugal on reddit. These moments were... Not unnerving per se, but worrisome. Never in my life I experienced something like this.

Some news started coming in, but none of them mentioned anything that we already didn't know. Just that there was a outage and that there wasn't a lot of information about it.

Comments on reddit started saying that this outage was also international, that regions in Spain were affected. Soon after, also France. Then some also said that it happened in Germany, Switzerland, Belgium and Italy.

Soon after, it dropped, and I paraphrase the title of the news: "Outage in Europe. Military personnel summoned".

My dudes, the brainstorm and red flags that went in my head at this moment...... I kept my cool and tried to stay calm, but internally I was going at 300 km/h. The only logical conclusion at this time was "Russia is f*cking invading us".

Didn't help that, at this time, there still wasn't any confirmations if it was a cyber attack or not, so all the possibilities were on the table as far as I was concerned.

I kept refreshing, waiting for the page to update with more information, while hanging out with my colleagues. After a short while, around 12:30 - I think - there were confirmations that it wasn't a cyber attack, but instead a technical incident. The comments and reports were all over the place, some said it was a fire in France, then an airplane that crashed, then it was something in Spain, etc etc. So I decided to tune everything out and only use that page as SSOT.

Glad I did that because, we all decided to go for lunch, and people were all talking about what happened. And some, started saying that russian submarines were spotted along the coast, that they saw it on Facebook. Misinformation on social today must have been on an all time high.

Our company decided to let us go home, so I got into my car and went home. While traveling, I turned on the radio to "Antena 1", a national radio station that kept giving us information about what was happening.

So for starters, yes, the military was summoned but it was to help with all the problems that we were facing. People got stuck in metro stations and elevators. Traffic lights weren't working so there were accidents. People panicked and started buying anything and everything on the supermarkets and stores. Some gas stations closed.

Some supermarkets and stores were closed due to them not being able to process the purchases. The only one that remained open were the ones with generators.

Pharmacies were also facing issues since they couldn't connect to their centralized databases (from what I understood), but there were also worries if their generators would last long enough to keep the medications in low temperatures.

As I was driving, it was also confirmed that general power would return between 6 to 10 hours, but at most it could take 72. General power should be stabilized in a week.

Once I got home, I found my old radio, that has at least 20 years, put some batteries in it and synced to Antena 1, and listened to it throughout the whole day. We're talking about an analogue radio, the kind that you have to rotate the wheel to set the frequency.

One thing that I started to appreciate, is how my iphone 12 pro max, a technological marvel, became basically unusable. While this simple piece of plastic that my parents bought for maybe 5 euros just worked. The cellular towers started to fail throughout the country, as they themselves started to run out of power (I assume they had generators). Meanwhile, this radio, it just worked.

I spent the whole day listening to it, and took the chance to watch Chainsaw man, that I had downloaded on my phone.

It was.... I don't really know how to describe it, but the fact that I could keep up with what was happening was good. The idea of just waiting without knowing what was happening is stressful. This tiny radio was my only source of information, at this point I had no internet, no TV, no calls, no text messages, no nothing, just the radio.

I know that right now it feels like I'm praising the hell out of that radio, but that's because it really did feel like the only connection I had to the outside the world, not counting my neighbours of course.

As for food and water, thankfully I was fine. But there were people that didn't have much at hand and - understandably - were scared that they wouldn't have enough for the next days.

Thankfully though, the guys over at the power plants did an excelent job and power started returning in several regions, one at a time, now at night. I got power a while back.

So... Other than the existencial dread that I got in the morning, it was fine for me personally. Although I can't imagine those that got stuck in metros and elevators and trains.

I got humbled today. We take the internet, TV, power, calls and messages for granted, but today I didn't have access to any of them, and for a while not having them for a few days was a real possibility.

In terms of food and water, I was fine, but I think I'm really going to get one of those survival kits after all, just in case. Hopefully I'll never need it but better prepared than sorry.