72 votes

Should the plural of "milf" be "milfs" or "milves"?

Tell Tildes your opinion

72 comments

  1. [14]
    kfwyre
    Link
    The milves were busy making loaves of bread, tending to their calves and wolves, and placing their knives back on their shelves. Being that they were milves, they were wearing only their brieves,...
    • Exemplary

    The milves were busy making loaves of bread, tending to their calves and wolves, and placing their knives back on their shelves.

    Being that they were milves, they were wearing only their brieves, which was standard for when they were under their own rooves.

    Some oaves in the neighborhood chauvanistically assumed the milves were little more than cheves, and thought themselves better than the milves.

    So the milves asked the oaves for prooves.

    Alas, the oaves had none and were shaken in their believes.

    In celebration, the milves asked the oaves for their finest scarves. After turning them over, the milves cut them in halves and scornfully said: “We milves are equal to you oaves. As punishment for your wrongdoing, you must become eternal thieves of the leaves of olive trees along the cliffves and bluffves.”

    The oaves left for good, never to return. The milves then decided to marry one another and lived happy lives as wives in brieves under their rooves — making their loaves, tending to their calves and wolves, and keeping their knives off the shelves and at the ready should the oaves ever return with their sheaves of leaves.

    119 votes
    1. alp
      Link Parent
      Eight years on this wonderful website and this is probably my favourite thing I’ve seen here. I’m sure that some of these turns of phrase will simmer in my head for years to come. You monster

      Eight years on this wonderful website and this is probably my favourite thing I’ve seen here. I’m sure that some of these turns of phrase will simmer in my head for years to come. You monster

      15 votes
    2. kfwyre
      Link Parent
      We did it, Tildes! Of all my contributions to the site, the above is now my most highly voted comment. I'd like to thank the English language for being the fertile soil in which all kinds of...

      We did it, Tildes!

      Of all my contributions to the site, the above is now my most highly voted comment.

      I'd like to thank the English language for being the fertile soil in which all kinds of wonderful words can flourish.

      Most importantly though, I'd like to thank the milves for trusting me to share their important story with the world.

      Milve on, milves. Never stop milving.

      15 votes
    3. [6]
      chocobean
      Link Parent
      Probably best use of Examplary tag use I've seen in a while. But should I also tag it as Joke....?

      Probably best use of Examplary tag use I've seen in a while. But should I also tag it as Joke....?

      10 votes
      1. kfwyre
        Link Parent
        These milves, battling sexism and doing the hard work of establishing their own successful sapphic commune, are a joke to you?! 😉

        These milves, battling sexism and doing the hard work of establishing their own successful sapphic commune, are a joke to you?! 😉

        16 votes
      2. DefinitelyNotAFae
        Link Parent
        iMO tags are dependent on the nature of the thread and post together. In the context of this thread probably nah for me.

        iMO tags are dependent on the nature of the thread and post together. In the context of this thread probably nah for me.

        5 votes
    4. tomorrow-never-knows
      Link Parent
      Ah, the English language - say what you will, but it could never be accused of consistency. Beautifully done!

      Ah, the English language - say what you will, but it could never be accused of consistency. Beautifully done!

      7 votes
    5. [3]
      drivick
      Link Parent
      Could AI come up with this? I'm ESL and not familiar enough with AI capabilities, but this post has a distinct kind of funny I'm sure current models can't come up with on a first try. Obviously if...

      Could AI come up with this?

      I'm ESL and not familiar enough with AI capabilities, but this post has a distinct kind of funny I'm sure current models can't come up with on a first try.

      Obviously if it became commonplace slang, it would get picked up by the training datasets, but I'd like to think originality is still a human domain.

      5 votes
      1. [2]
        Muffin
        Link Parent
        Is this how we think about anything creative now?

        Is this how we think about anything creative now?

        21 votes
        1. DeaconBlue
          Link Parent
          Correct. Any time anything novel happens, there is an obligatory question of whether it was novel enough.

          Correct. Any time anything novel happens, there is an obligatory question of whether it was novel enough.

          11 votes
  2. Bonooru
    Link
    Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General and the abbreviations thereof are AG and AGs. It follows that MILF should be MILFs.
    • Exemplary

    Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General and the abbreviations thereof are AG and AGs. It follows that MILF should be MILFs.

    67 votes
  3. [7]
    artvandelay
    (edited )
    Link
    Finally some real discussion on this site. I don't really have much else to add here, I think @Bonooru's and @Banazir's line of reasoning applies here. MILF is an acronym and English tends to...

    Finally some real discussion on this site.

    I don't really have much else to add here, I think @Bonooru's and @Banazir's line of reasoning applies here. MILF is an acronym and English tends to pluralize acronyms with a simple "-s" at the end. DVDs, AGs, CDs, MILFs.

    37 votes
    1. [5]
      CptBluebear
      Link Parent
      I would agree, if @kfwyre didn't seem to have that post on his clipboard waiting for this opportunity. I'm now more torn than I was before.

      I would agree, if @kfwyre didn't seem to have that post on his clipboard waiting for this opportunity. I'm now more torn than I was before.

      9 votes
      1. [4]
        kfwyre
        Link Parent
        I’ll have you know that I gave up actual IRL sleep to compose The Fable of the Lesbian-Separatist Harem of Milves.

        I’ll have you know that I gave up actual IRL sleep to compose The Fable of the Lesbian-Separatist Harem of Milves.

        26 votes
        1. zod000
          Link Parent
          And we are all better people for it. I applaud you and your sleep deprivation!

          And we are all better people for it. I applaud you and your sleep deprivation!

          7 votes
        2. [2]
          chocobean
          Link Parent
          Is it still a harem if the Miles don't cluster around one of the oaves?

          Is it still a harem if the Miles don't cluster around one of the oaves?

          2 votes
          1. kfwyre
            Link Parent
            Think of them more as an equal-opportunity, women-owned harem co-op rather than a traditional harem. They're really innovating in that space.

            Think of them more as an equal-opportunity, women-owned harem co-op rather than a traditional harem. They're really innovating in that space.

            4 votes
    2. PraiseTheSoup
      Link Parent
      DVDs and CDs aren't great examples as the last word in those acronyms simply gain an 's' for the plural anyway. But I do otherwise agree.

      DVDs and CDs aren't great examples as the last word in those acronyms simply gain an 's' for the plural anyway. But I do otherwise agree.

      6 votes
  4. [17]
    Eji1700
    Link
    It's called "a pride". I could use direction on what the plural of Timothée Chalamet would be

    It's called "a pride".

    I could use direction on what the plural of Timothée Chalamet would be

    26 votes
    1. unkz
      Link Parent
      Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General it follows that the plural is Timothées Chalamet.

      Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General it follows that the plural is Timothées Chalamet.

      27 votes
    2. [13]
      first-must-burn
      (edited )
      Link Parent
      Shouldn't the collective noun for a group of moms be a minivan-load? Or (perhaps less charitably), a leather bag? The c ollective noun for Timothee Chalomet would be either a Zendaya or a sandy...

      Shouldn't the collective noun for a group of moms be a minivan-load? Or (perhaps less charitably), a leather bag?

      The c
      ollective noun for Timothee Chalomet would be either a Zendaya or a sandy cane.

      Also, I wanted to take this chance to share my favorite meme of collective nouns

      11 votes
      1. [11]
        chocobean
        Link Parent
        Does a 101.5 FM exist in every city?

        Does a 101.5 FM exist in every city?

        6 votes
        1. [6]
          first-must-burn
          Link Parent
          I stopped listening to broadcast radio around 15 years ago, but everywhere I lived before then had one.

          I stopped listening to broadcast radio around 15 years ago, but everywhere I lived before then had one.

          1 vote
          1. [5]
            MimicSquid
            Link Parent
            I wonder if that range of frequency is particularly useful for FM radio transmission? I've heard of stations as low as the upper 80s and as high as 106, but don't know the physics behind how/why...

            I wonder if that range of frequency is particularly useful for FM radio transmission? I've heard of stations as low as the upper 80s and as high as 106, but don't know the physics behind how/why they cluster where they do. If it even is physics instead of regulations.

            2 votes
            1. [4]
              DefinitelyNotAFae
              Link Parent
              Apparently 107.9 (for commercial) and 88.1 (for the non-commercial "educational" ) frequencies are the most common. 101.5 isn't particularly notable. Most common monikers are "Mix" "Q" and "Hot" I...

              Apparently 107.9 (for commercial) and 88.1 (for the non-commercial "educational" ) frequencies are the most common. 101.5 isn't particularly notable.

              Most common monikers are "Mix" "Q" and "Hot"

              I found that neat.

              5 votes
              1. [2]
                zod000
                Link Parent
                That was incredibly topical and informative. Thanks!

                That was incredibly topical and informative. Thanks!

                4 votes
                1. DefinitelyNotAFae
                  Link Parent
                  Yw! I love finding random bits of info I never thought to look up before.

                  Yw! I love finding random bits of info I never thought to look up before.

                  3 votes
              2. MimicSquid
                Link Parent
                That's a very cool page. Thanks for sharing!

                That's a very cool page. Thanks for sharing!

                3 votes
        2. [4]
          Eric_the_Cerise
          Link Parent
          I would argue that the location has no bearing. Can you not still refer to "a pride of lions" in, eg, Canada, despite having no prides of lions roaming the Canadian savanna?

          I would argue that the location has no bearing. Can you not still refer to "a pride of lions" in, eg, Canada, despite having no prides of lions roaming the Canadian savanna?

          1 vote
          1. [3]
            chocobean
            Link Parent
            We have the mountain variety aplenty, methinks :) Actually, do mountain lions also group as pride???

            We have the mountain variety aplenty, methinks :)

            Actually, do mountain lions also group as pride???

            1 vote
            1. DefinitelyNotAFae
              Link Parent
              Iirc there's not a traditional collective noun for them because they're solitary. But there's also like several dozen names for the animal so I'd be surprised if there wasn't also several...

              Iirc there's not a traditional collective noun for them because they're solitary.

              But there's also like several dozen names for the animal so I'd be surprised if there wasn't also several collective options at least.

              3 votes
      2. Eji1700
        Link Parent
        I drop 101.5 “The Hammer” FM of months into conversation at every gloriously rare opportunity.

        I drop 101.5 “The Hammer” FM of months into conversation at every gloriously rare opportunity.

        2 votes
    3. json
      Link Parent
      The collective noun for a multiple of Timothée Chalamet is a contest.

      The collective noun for a multiple of Timothée Chalamet is a contest.

      5 votes
  5. Bauke
    Link
    Congratulations on posting the first topic with a "milf" tag. I propose we standardize the tag to the consensus of the topic so that we may accurately tag the many, many future milf topics yet to...

    Congratulations on posting the first topic with a "milf" tag.

    I propose we standardize the tag to the consensus of the topic so that we may accurately tag the many, many future milf topics yet to come.

    23 votes
  6. [7]
    kacey
    (edited )
    Link
    Trick question: MILF dervies from the Latin "milfus" -- loosely translated as "to have aged like a fine vinum [1]" -- therefore the entomologically correct plural form is "milfi". [1] translator's...

    Trick question: MILF dervies from the Latin "milfus" -- loosely translated as "to have aged like a fine vinum [1]" -- therefore the entomologically correct plural form is "milfi".

    [1] translator's note: vinum means wine

    22 votes
    1. [5]
      patience_limited
      Link Parent
      "entomologically" is bugging me.

      "entomologically" is bugging me.

      10 votes
      1. [3]
        kacey
        (edited )
        Link Parent
        Hah, yeah, I littorally went overboard with that one :3

        Hah, yeah, I littorally went overboard with that one :3

        5 votes
        1. [2]
          first-must-burn
          Link Parent
          Lettuce not put a stop to humor just because we want to be ahead.

          Lettuce not put a stop to humor just because we want to be ahead.

          5 votes
          1. kacey
            Link Parent
            Oh no I edited my post to remove what I felt was a subpar joke clause D: apologies

            Oh no I edited my post to remove what I felt was a subpar joke clause D: apologies

            3 votes
      2. fnulare
        Link Parent
        I find it very pleasing, more specific than "automagically" which is just pleasing ;)

        I find it very pleasing, more specific than "automagically" which is just pleasing ;)

        1 vote
  7. [4]
    Banazir
    Link
    Because it's an acronym, I would say it's "MILFs". One could also argue that since "Mothers" is the plural part, MILF is both singular and plural. I am not making this argument, but bringing up as...

    Because it's an acronym, I would say it's "MILFs".

    One could also argue that since "Mothers" is the plural part, MILF is both singular and plural. I am not making this argument, but bringing up as a potential (wrong) option.

    16 votes
    1. Sunbutt23
      Link Parent
      You could technically use MsILF then no? (Emms ill ff)

      You could technically use MsILF then no? (Emms ill ff)

      6 votes
    2. [2]
      TaylorSwiftsPickles
      Link Parent
      See, I and many others use it as a proper noun at this point. So my half-conscious brain running on 2.5 hours of sleep had this genius idea

      See, I and many others use it as a proper noun at this point. So my half-conscious brain running on 2.5 hours of sleep had this genius idea

      5 votes
      1. Banazir
        Link Parent
        New acronym unlocked: Mothers I'd Like to Very Enthusiastically Sex

        New acronym unlocked: Mothers I'd Like to Very Enthusiastically Sex

        16 votes
  8. [2]
    TheRtRevKaiser
    Link
    Tolkien would probably prefer milves, he originally preferred "dwarfs" as the plural for "dwarf" but changed his mind later to "dwarves"

    Tolkien would probably prefer milves, he originally preferred "dwarfs" as the plural for "dwarf" but changed his mind later to "dwarves"

    12 votes
    1. Narry
      Link Parent
      In my mind, Milf has become a word unto itself removed from its original acronym. I feel like it should be Milves, like Tolkien did with Dwarves, yes. I agree with you.

      In my mind, Milf has become a word unto itself removed from its original acronym. I feel like it should be Milves, like Tolkien did with Dwarves, yes. I agree with you.

      8 votes
  9. DFGdanger
    Link
    The collective noun for a group of them is called a Coolidge

    The collective noun for a group of them is called a Coolidge

    9 votes
  10. cutmetal
    Link
    I vote milves because it's more fun, but @Bauke should make this a survey question so we can settle this once and for all.

    I vote milves because it's more fun, but @Bauke should make this a survey question so we can settle this once and for all.

    8 votes
  11. [7]
    Raistlin
    Link
    I really do think it's MILFs. We say gifs and radars, right? We usually pluralise acronyms as they are.

    I really do think it's MILFs. We say gifs and radars, right? We usually pluralise acronyms as they are.

    6 votes
    1. [5]
      hobbes64
      Link Parent
      You mispronounced gifs though, I think you meant jifs.

      You mispronounced gifs though, I think you meant jifs.

      12 votes
      1. [3]
        Omnicrola
        Link Parent
        Get out.

        Get out.

        12 votes
        1. [2]
          redwall_hp
          Link Parent
          GIF is actually pronounced "deprecated waste of bandwidth, use a modern video format." It's a common misconception. The original peanut butter pun intended by the developers is the second most...

          GIF is actually pronounced "deprecated waste of bandwidth, use a modern video format." It's a common misconception.

          The original peanut butter pun intended by the developers is the second most right, though.

          16 votes
          1. mantrid
            Link Parent
            I think most GIFs these days are actually MP4s or WebMs with a .gif extension, and have been for many years. It wouldn't make sense to any image host to store them in the original format, but the...

            I think most GIFs these days are actually MP4s or WebMs with a .gif extension, and have been for many years. It wouldn't make sense to any image host to store them in the original format, but the use of GIF to mean "very short looping video or animation" somehow caught on.

            5 votes
    2. cutmetal
      Link Parent
      Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General. It follows that the plural of gifs is radarves. Yes, like Tolkien did.

      Since the plural of Attorney General is Attorneys General. It follows that the plural of gifs is radarves. Yes, like Tolkien did.

      5 votes
  12. [2]
    BailerAppleby
    Link
    I think we're going about this all wrong. As an acronym, MILF always gets treated as a noun. But to give this loving term the respect it needs, it should be elevated to being used as an adjective....

    I think we're going about this all wrong. As an acronym, MILF always gets treated as a noun. But to give this loving term the respect it needs, it should be elevated to being used as an adjective.

    For example, keep it in the family and pair "MILF" with "baby" to create "MILFbaby", as in:

    "Whoa, did you see that MILFbaby over there? Now, that's an additional member to the family portrait I'd like to add."

    6 votes
    1. DefinitelyNotAFae
      Link Parent
      Well I hate the term "keeping it in the family" and adding "baby" in about equal measure which is perhaps impressive

      Well I hate the term "keeping it in the family" and adding "baby" in about equal measure which is perhaps impressive

      12 votes
  13. [3]
    chili-man
    Link
    When I say this (as oft I do), I tend to pronounce as "milves" (easy to pronounce) even though I would spell it MILFs in writing

    When I say this (as oft I do), I tend to pronounce as "milves" (easy to pronounce) even though I would spell it MILFs in writing

    5 votes
    1. [2]
      xk3
      Link Parent
      If someone pronounced "milves" in a sentence I wouldn't know what they were talking about... maybe I would hear "mills" (like windmills)?? Additionally, if you write MILFs I can Ctrl+F "MILF" and...

      If someone pronounced "milves" in a sentence I wouldn't know what they were talking about... maybe I would hear "mills" (like windmills)??

      Additionally, if you write MILFs I can Ctrl+F "MILF" and still see relevant content whereas "milves" will mismatch on "v"

      2 votes
  14. Monte_Kristo
    Link
    I think we've already come to a consensus, but I just want to tack on that the other "-ILF" acronyms sound significantly worse. I don't think ILF dilves or gilves.

    I think we've already come to a consensus, but I just want to tack on that the other "-ILF" acronyms sound significantly worse. I don't think ILF dilves or gilves.

    3 votes
  15. jredd23
    Link
    Excellent use of internet resources, finally, something we all can get behind!

    Excellent use of internet resources, finally, something we all can get behind!

    3 votes