I signed up for a class from Udemy. Udemy makes tech classes you take at your own pace. The lessons are many short videos with lectures and some practical exercises.

I signed up for a class that will prepare me to take a certification class for a skill that will help my resume. Complete worth it.

I am about 2/3 done.

The thing is I've getting frustrated and mentally run down.

The course is voluminous. The going is slow.

I know the thing to do is to forget about finishing, forget about the results, and just focus on enjoying each lesson in the hear and now.

I enjoy taking notes, I am good at it, and I find reviewing notes to be soothing/meditative.

I still get frustrated and demoralized.

Worse, I always thought if I got a lot of time to learn something I would sit down at it 8 hours a day and blow it away. I get wiped out at about 3-4 hours. I'm kicking myself for this which isn't helping.

Any advice, commiseration, or success stories?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Author's note: I'm mostly typing this up for myself as a writing exercise to sum up my situation, so that I can present it to a doctor one day if I can find one who will listen. It's a long read, and I don't expect anyone to seriously read it? But, if you happen to make it through and have any advice, or recommendations for specialists I could seek out, I would really appreciate that.

I work remotely as an open source maintainer for a university research lab, so I spend a lot of time at my computer. Throughout my adult life, I've found that I work best when sitting in my bed with my laptop. Yet, I figure sitting in my bed isn't the best for my body, so I've tried hard over the years to make a desk setup that's as accommodating as possible:

• I have a big corner desk with lots of tabletop space and overhead cabinets.
• I've set up cozy under-cabinet 2700K LED strip lightning.
• I've decorated the space with nice sentimental things.
• I've got a foot-warmer under the desk (since I have chronic ice-cold feet for reasons I don't yet understand).
• I own a (secondhand) Steelcase Leap v1 that I've meticulously adjusted to my body, making sure all of the heights and distances are within typical ergonomic recommendations.
• I have an ergonomic keyboard with a sliding under-desk tray
• I've gotten dual monitors, with one being a modern 1024*1280 monitor to avoid whiplash from an extra-wide double-1080p monitor setup.

Despite all of the above, every time I go to use my setup, I feel a big sense of revulsion and a big urge to just curl up in bed with my laptop.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about why I react this way, and I attribute it to a whole bunch of underlying factors:

1. I'm autistic+anxious (ASD/GAD diagnoses), and I was previously diagnosed with ADHD, too.
2. I struggle a lot with pain/physical discomfort:
   • One of my brain quirks is that I have big sensory sensitivities surrounding my body. I'm hyperaware of any uncomfortable sensations in my body, and pain/discomfort can completely derail my ability to focus and be present in the moment. For example, if I eat too much and feel overfull, the sensation of my stomach pressing against my other internal organs drives me crazy, to the point where I can hardly even watch a show or listen to music. The same goes for when I'm constipated or have an upset stomach. When I get like this, it's like I can't feel any emotions. The discomfort/pain are the only physical sensations I can take in, because they crowd everything else out. I can't feel warmth or happiness or fullness in my heart. All I feel is discomfort.
   • My anxiety results in a near-constant state of tension. I'm often very aware of the booming of my heartbeat, or tightness in my chest. I fall into a negative feedback loop, as it makes it very difficult to relax, which further triggers anxiety and tension. (Side note: Beta blockers are the most effective anti-anxiety medications I've ever been prescribed for exactly this reason. They target the physical sensations, and helped me feel an overall sense of calm. I haven't been prescribed them in 7+ years, though, because every new GP/psych I visit automatically discounts them as off-label/not-first-line approaches, even though I've had direct success with them when other approaches have failed. I wish doctors would listen to me. Would weed help?)
   • When I get anxious/depressed, I find that my posture suffers a lot. My body sort of curls in on itself, as though it were attempting the fetal position. It takes an exceedingly difficult amount of effort to preserve good posture the more fatigued I get. But, in such a state, I don't have the spoons to exert this effort -- it gets harder and harder until I inevitably curl up in bed.
   • Wouldn't you know it, I have chronic pain, too. Multiple times a week, it manifests as this combo of upper-back/shoulder/neck/sinus/behind-the-eyes pain. It typically happens only on one side of my body (though which side it happens on is not consistent). The sinus pain is curious, too: I regularly have a "cold nose" (similar to my cold feet), and breathing in feels icy and sharp, with a tingle like I'm about to sneeze. I find myself reflexively picking or prodding at my nose just to distract from the painful sensations. I often cover my nose with my shirt so that I can breathe in my warm, moist, exhaled breath. It doesn't really warm up my nose, but it provides some in the moment relief.
   • You can imagine what this chronic pain does to my ability to feel emotions or focus on tasks... I rely a LOT on Aleve. ;;
   • I'm also sensitive to temperature: I really dislike being too cold or too hot. I often change clothes multiple times a day, from shirts to sweaters and back + shorts to sweatpants and back, because I'm constantly adjusting my temperature.
   • I also am particular about pressure and textures on my skin. I don't really like having my skin exposed? I like big comfy sweaters and a specific kind of sweatpants that Uniqlo used to sell. I also really adore this specific duvet I got from IKEA, because it's big and fluffy and weighty. It's like a semi-weighted blanket without being so densely concentrated (I have a glass bead weighted blanket I hardly use because of how icky it feels).
   • Because of all of this, my ideal state of being is one where my body just kind of... disappears from my consciousness? I strongly wish I could exist without being aware of my physical form, because I'd say at least 90% of my waking hours I'm feeling some form of discomfort or another, and thus 90% of the time any happiness is blocked by the discomfort.
3. As far as working on a computer, I find that I'm most productive when I can sink into a state of hyperfocus/flow and attack a task for hours at a time in a single sitting. I'll lose track of time, come out of the state wondering where the day went, yet be insanely productive during that period.
   • Naturally, this goes against conventional advice for computer-based WFH, since in this state I don't take stretching breaks, don't adjust my posture, don't rest my eyes, etc. But, I find forced breaks tend to rip me out of my focus, and it takes a lot of self-regulation/spoons to get back on track after a break.
   • Despite the terrible ergonomics of hyperfocus, it counterintuitively acts as a needed respite from the pain/discomfort. Being hyperfocused is one of the only states that supersedes the sensory sensitivity I have. I'll often be so focused that I don't notice the state my body is in, which is pretty much my ideal! (Side note: Because of this dynamic, I often lean on rhythm video games as a respite for pain, too. They're easy for me to hyperfocus on, which makes passing the time a lot more bearable for me when I'm in pain.)
4. And, the environment most conducive for sparking a state of hyperfocus is my bed, rather than a desk.
   • Even with all my adjustments, my desk feels very finicky and dynamic. The chair rolls, the keyboard tray slides, the chair back reclines, my foot warmer slides around. Rarely do I feel anchored, and rarely does everything feel "just right". I can't really find a "locked in" position for hyperfocus, as my body is always interacting with its environment via subtle little tics and adjustments.
   • I also find that sitting at a desk leaves me feeling rather exposed? Even with clothes on, I just... don't have enough weight on my legs to feel fully comfortable.
   • When I do try to sit at a desk, I may be somewhat comfortable at first, but as time goes on I get more and more uncomfortable. Maybe a tricky task temporarily spikes my anxiety, which causes tension and pain, which makes me focus on the pain, which makes it harder to think clearly about the task at hand, which makes me more anxious, which begins to affect my posture, which makes it harder to properly sit in my ergonomic chair. I'll fidget and shift, and start to lean on one arm. It often escalates to the point where it feels like torture to hold my own body up, because I feel like a ragdoll in my chair.
   • My bed, by comparison, doesn't ask any effort of me at all. I'm fully enveloped by the mattress and my pillows, so if I end up in "ragdoll anxiety/depression" mode, I'm supported in exactly the same way I would be if I was in "full spoons" mode. I also get the comfort of my duvet, with fluffy warmth and weight on every part of my body, and very little of me being exposed.
   • This means that I can somewhat ignore my body when I'm in my bed. Even if I'm in pain, even if I'm anxious, I don't really have to... DO anything about it? I don't have to physically move my body in a specific way in order to keep hacking away at a task. The pain will still be there, but the hyperfocus state can win out, and I can work away while feeling like my laptop is an extension of my body.

Surely this isn't good for me, right? Surely I should be attacking the root of the problem so that I don't devolve into a ragdoll mess of pain every time I try and use a desk? Surely lying in bed for hours at a time isn't good for my body, right? But, with this multi-layered set of factors, with many of them being inherent anxious/autistic traits, I don't know how to create an environment that's any better for me than my bed is.

What do?

I'm trying to find the root cause of my declining mental health. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe my brain is just physically broken and I have to deal with it.
But what I tend to think of recently is the concept of belongingness.
I rarely feel I have a sense of belonging anywhere. And my theory is that the constant otherness is what is causing the degradation.

So what i want to is, for those who experience frequent depressive cycles -- do you have a sense of belonging? Or do you too feel constantly othered?

(I hope this makes sense haha)

I have a very long history of mental illness from age 10, and though I've cycled through a lot of explanations the diagnoses that best match my symptoms currently are currently ADHD and CPTSD. I am medicated for both, and although I am not in active therapy I have also done therapy. I consider my mental health relatively well-managed currently: at least, I am not in any urgent danger of hurting myself and it has been a very long time since I have been. Certainly things could be better but I'm usually functional.

But sometimes I go through these phases, generally 1-3 months long, where my ability to function on a normal level slips dramatically. It never gets to the nightmarish state I was in when I was a teenager, but it becomes hard to... oh, make appointments, do the dishes, walk the dog, just generally deal with the obligations of being an adult. My house is never in GREAT shape but it becomes a disaster. Work performance suffers a lot, my relationships suffer. I also start experiencing emotional PMS symptoms (or perhaps I just lose the ability to suppress them), and while I'm not the type to have "emotional outbursts" I do experience deep and irrational sadness or anger on those days. I also tend to end up dealing with insomnia, which is like a force multiplier on feeling overwhelmed.

It sucks especially because it's like I'm watching myself do it, and I feel as though I don't have enough control over myself to nip it in the bud, and sometimes the damage I do during these times is not fixable at all. It's almost like an unplaceable craving, like there's some thing I'm missing and my subconscious and my body are trying to send me signals, and I just can't interpret them right and figure out what I need.

How I generally get out of these phases is -- well, it's a bit chicken-egg, because the turmoil makes it difficult for me to reach out for help or even do anything to help myself, so to me it seems like sometimes the wave just passes. I'll say, "ok, this time I'll get my shit together", download some new app or whatever, organize my time or tasks via some new fascinating system, and that'll work... but it feels like it's only because I'm "ready" for it to work.

I think it's unlikely I'll find a solution that will work indefinitely to prevent these slips (hooray, novelty-obsessed brain). And anyway - as though it even needs to be said - I'm sulking in the midst of one now, so prevention or reduction tips might be helpful later, but for this moment I'm mostly concerned with getting out once I'm in.

If you have "swingy" mental health, or phases, or waves - what do YOU do about it, if anything? Therapy? Do you change your medication? Do you take a vacation? Commiserate on your favourite internet forums? What works for you?

I'm a long time Tildes user but I've created this separate account because I'd like to avoid connecting this topic to my normal username.

I am going through a divorce that will take about a year to finalize and I am struggling with the stress. If it were a short term thing, I would grit my teeth and bear it, but I have a full year ahead and I'm afraid I need some help in order to make it through with my physical and mental health intact.

My wife has a personality that includes "kill mode" for anyone she deems as an opponent -- whether it is another driver on the road, a customer service agent who doesn't give her what she wants, or anyone at all who she perceives as having slighted her. This is one of the reasons why we're getting divorced. I have nearly the opposite approach to conflict, and I can't handle seeing people get attacked so fiercely or so often. Now that we're getting divorced, I am the target of these attacks. For clarity, they're only verbal attacks, not physical -- there is no physical abuse in this case.

I could stiffen up and fight back whenever she starts arguing with me, but we have kids and I want to commit myself to preventing their exposure to hostilities as much as possible. But this means I have to do my best to brush off my wife's verbal abuse and maintain composure so they can have a stable dad to rely on.

Right now I'm having trouble sleeping and I am constantly anxious throughout the day. It gets worse whenever I have to interact with my wife; and unfortunately we have to interact frequently every day to coordinate childcare and logistics of the divorce. I have a tightness in my chest from being so anxious (not heart attack) and I am struggling to maintain focus on work or any tasks I have to complete. I can hold back the tears, but I really do want to cry many, many times a day.

What can I do to wade through this time period? I know there are breathing exercises to help calm down. What else can you recommend? I am trying to make sure I do eat well enough and that I drink enough water. I avoid alcohol entirely and don't take any kind of medication.

Any advice at all would be greatly appreciated. And I'm sorry if this is not an appropriate forum for this question. I will delete if so.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Hey there, curious if any other folks on tildes suffer with this, and if so, if you can share things that have helped you.

Context: I am a very light sleeper. Eg: the sound of a phone vibrating, or whispering, will wake me up. I have no issues falling asleep at night, nor do I have any anxiety around sleep, I just wake up from the slightest noise. I've been like this all my life.

Unfortunately, I also live in a very noisy neighborhood: lots of modded vehicles, lots of rumbling bass, etc. I wake up 2-5 times a night. I might get a full night sleep once every 2 months.

For the past year, I've been working very hard on solving this problem. I have made some progress, but still suffer nightly because of this. Things I've done:

• Noise masking: I now have 2 white noise machines, an air purifier (max volume), and sleep with ear plugs. Unbelievably, the cars are still loud enough to be heard over all of that and wake me up. Even when I can't hear them, they vibrate the floor/my bed, and the vibration wakes me up. However, this has still made a massive difference (I went from about 3-4 hours sleep/night, to 6-7.)

• Sleep hygiene. I've learned a lot about it, and worked hard to implement different techniques. I keep a very steady sleep schedule. I eat well and exercise. I do not get in bed ever unless for sleep. etc. While this does not prevent waking up from noise, I think it helps with keeping sleep consistent (i.e. at least I know what time I'll get tired at night.)

• Light: In similar vein of sleep hygiene, I've learned a lot about how light impacts our sleep wake cycles; I avoid light and screens in the evening, and get in direct sunlight (for about 20-30 minutes) within an hour of waking. Again, doesn't help with noise, but helps tremendously with keeping sleep consistent.

• Medical help: I see a neurologist / sleep specialist. He is wonderful He prescribed a low dose of gabapentin, which has actually been really helpful. Unfortunately, it only lasts about 4 hours, so while the first half of the night is good, I still wake up many times in the second half of the night. I have tried some other medications (trazadone, benadryl, zyrtec) but they have either had no impact (trazadone), or make you drowsy the next day which makes me miserable (bendaryl, zyrtec).

One slight annoyance is that whenever I bring up sleep issues, the first response I tend to get is "you must have anxiety". Then, advice is tailored to that. Really, it is not anxiety, and therapy will not help me here. I just wake up insanely easy. It seems most solutions are for folks with anxiety, and I don't find a lot for folks that are just light sleepers. Can anyone relate?

Any advice you can throw my way?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

It's Spring here in Australia which means hayfever for me and more frequent usually minor sinus pain. I often wear sunglasses outside but I have 20/20 vision (afaik) so I don't have prescription glasses. I did get some cheap blue-light glasses a few years ago in case they helped with tiredness/eye strain/sleep hygiene when I was using screens late at night. I recently noticed that wearing them when I have sinus pain helps alleviate the pain a little. I've noticed before that pinching the bridge of my nose can help especially when the pain is bad, so I suppose it makes sense that the glasses do something similar.

This is my first post, and usually when I'm curious about something I look it up, but I only really found people talking about how glasses can cause headaches when they're ill-fitting. So I thought I'd ask around here to see if anyone else has experienced this or otherwise was interested in the topic. And maybe this will help someone in a similar situation.

Hello ~health tilderinos!

I have a case of the 'uneven pecs'.
To elaborate, my left pecs is much more developed and my right seems to be lagging behind which is mighty frustrating because I've always used dumbbells to eradicate any sort of uneven muscle development :(

My upper body strength training routine consists of

• bench presses (incline, flat, decline) with dumbbells
• bench presses (incline and flat) with cables for inner chest development
• rows with cable machine
• cable crossovers (high, low, mid)
• dumbbell pullover

FWIW I do have really uneven abs -- the abs on my left side are off by one. They first left ab starts where the second ab of the right side starts if that makes sense?
So I am sort of acknowledging that this could be genetic and out of my control.

Any help/insight/advice appreciated!

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I had a stroke last year, which left me partially paralyzed. I'm doing much better and only my left hand and arm are still somewhat affected. Even though my stroke wasn't related to my lifestyle, I would like to get in better shape, and my PT has recommended getting an indoor bike. I would like one with pulse readers in the handle bars and preferably USB port to connect a tablet or phone to keep track of my progress. I live in Europe, so something available here would also be preferable. Does ~health have any experience or suggestions?

Getting to that age that I know my hearing is declining and I have steady tinnitus, which I'm pretty used to already. Conversation in a quiet room is no problem but in a busy restaurant I have to concentrate and strain to pick up what's being said. I can tell I have to play things a bit louder than I used to. I'm delaying going to an audiologist for a test out of anxiety that I'll have to get hearing aids.

Which makes me wonder what they're really like - How does using them change your hearing? Do you get back the crisp highs and lows in music? Is conversation in a noisy place easier? How much maintenance do they require?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I've started to date a lovely woman, and she's now allowed me to know that she has Dissociative Identity Disorder. I've done my best to read and watch information about the 'disorder' but I was wondering if anyone has had any experiences that might they're willing to share.

I know that everyone is different, and there's no set way anyone who has it acts or behaves.

This thread can be used for general recommendations for anyone, but I'm specifically looking for a daily sunscreen I can wear on my face and neck.

I'm looking for a holy grail sunscreen that might not even exist (in the US, but I'm willing to import if needed). Here are my preferences:

• Not greasy
• No whitecast
• I'm not allergic to it (this I won't know until I try it -- I'm allergic to "fragrance" which is a relatively useless thing to know -- it just means that any scented product is a roll of the die as to whether or not I react with it because there are thousands of different things that can constitute "fragrance" in a product)

I found what I thought was it: this imported sunscreen. Went on easy, smelled great (green apple!), and legitimately worked.

Unfortunately, I'm allergic to it.

I've since replaced it with this Sun Bum face stick which is similar, but it doesn't go on nearly as easily and the synthetic banana smell is offputting. Nevertheless, I put up with it because 1) it doesn't activate my allergies (yay!) and 2) the banana smell is actually better to me than "regular" sunscreen smell.

Sun Bum actually has a fragrance free mineral sunscreen, but it still smells like sunscreen (which I hate) and it has a really strong whitecast, so it's out.

The Sun Bum I'm using now technically "works" for what I want, but I don't love it. I'm looking to see if there's something out there that I can actually love wearing, especially because I'm going to be doing it daily.

If anyone has any recommendations, please let me know!

I've just started switching my medication and it's been pretty bad for me. Brain zaps are very frequent and I'm crying a lot. I'm struggling.

I've been trying to find out what other people's experience has been like when they switch meds. What is normal and what isn't. People who relate to brain zaps and how they deal with it. Are brain zaps even considered a real thing?

What has your experience been like?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

We have the weekly fitness check-in but I thought it would be valuable to have a thread to discuss more specific lifting topics and resources.

• What type of programs do you gravitate towards?
• Do you compete in Powerlifting/Weightlifting/Strongman or some other discipline? Any upcoming meets worth watching?
• Have you found any resources that others might be interested in?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I was inspired to write this after reading this reddit post. It ranted about people who attempt to disuade people from commiting suicide by telling them that they are selfish because of the impact it will have on other people (I do think it is explained better in the post if you are interested).
However I have also been thinking about how suicide prevention is handled by most governments. I am not sure of exactly what process happens in other countries, but in America if you fail a suicide attempt you can be involuntarily put into a mental health asylum for a temporary period of time, and from reading many accounts of what people have experienced in these asylums and from my ongoing experience with suicidal idealation I very much feel i would be 10x more likely to commit suicide if I was put into such a facility once i got out.
But I also wanted to talk about other ways individuals may try to disuade people from suicide which i find problematic. Before i continue, i do want to say that I am not blaming these people, they have very good intentions. But something that has bugged me for a while has been that whenever people discuss suicide/mental health problems the first thing that is done is just recommending suicide hotlines/telling the person in question to seek a therapist/psychologist. While these options can be good for many people, i want to mention that

1. Suicide hotlines (mainly 811) are known for reporting people to police and having them put in mental health asylums (often times unnecisarlly). And staff at these suicide hotlines are often uneducated or rude to callers, or will just not answer or even hang up.
2. Many people in these circumstances do not have access to trained proffesionals. Even if you live in a country with public healthcare, you may be in a situations (mainly abuse) where you cant get access to one either way.

Anyways sorry for the rambling, my brain is tired and i just wanted to get this out there. But based off of the above points, do you think that suicide prevention in society is flawed, and what could be better? While i do agree that it is flawed and there are ideas related to government on how to handle suicide prevention, i do not know what could be done on the individual level. To me one of my only resources apart from seeing other people experiences online is music (mainly Elliot Smith, Linkin park, Soundgarden and Nirvana) which I deeply relate to. But anhedonia can prevent enjoyment of such things.

My mind is way annoying to listen to and I don’t like it!

I'm 45 years old and I have a hard time coming to term with the fact that the majority of my life---the one which supposedly should had been my golden years---lies in the past. I know I'm still alive but I just can't drum up much enthutiasm for an existence which I mostly see as sad leftovers of something which wasn't worth much either. I simply don't care much. I can distract myself for some time, but I have this deep feeling that, well, what's the point.

And I can ignore it, for some time. But ignorence can only go so far. At some point you need some hope, some sliver of meaning and purpose. And I just don't see it.

And this is all awful impractical, because whenever I try to strive for anything, my brain just goes, “narh, why bother struggle when it doesn’t lead to anything”

Is there any clever way to turn stuff like this around? Some NLP stuff to nudge me towards a less self-defeating mindset?

I'm failing. My usual tricks aren't working and I don't know what to do with my clothes anymore.

One of my ADHD symptoms is that needs to see everything. My "pantry" is open shelves in my kitchen. Everything in the fridge is up near the front of the shelves. I have a giant desk so I can spread out when I'm working. I need to see it all at all times.
So the issue becomes, how do I do that with clothes. My alligator brain wants them all over the floor so I can see everything. That's not gonna work lol. I used to be good with a closet with no doors, but my new apartment isn't laid out in a way I can do that.

Does anyone have any interesting clothes storage advice? The clutter is stressing me out, so I need to figure out whatever my new system is going to be.

Hi, I started trialing contact lenses (toric lenses, specifically) about a month ago, and have had a problem with them making my eyes seriously red. I've tried 3 different brands of contacts now, and the issue has persisted across all three. Has anyone else had a similar experience and figure out how to manage it? Thank you!

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I saw a post on reddit about a guy asking about why his wife changes hobbies so much. He went on to detail her getting super fixated on a hobby, investing a lot of money and learning a lot, and then dropping it. A lot of people were mentioning possibly being adhd.

I remember that being the first thing that clued me in as an adult who was not diagnosed until later in life.

Anyone else care to share?

About 3 or 4 times a year I will get pretty powerful manic episodes. Usually for a few days I'll stay at the office until late at night, I'm in an amazing mood, I'm always excited and have trouble sleeping. My focus is so powerful, If I could be this version of me all of the time I genuinely believe I could do anything.

It's like a totally different person from my usual self who is easily fatigued, slow to start, and generally lethargic.

Knowing this side of me exists is exciting but also kind of depressing given my awareness of its fleeting nature. How have you dealt with this? Any reading you could recomend?

I'm working on pruning the sources of information that come into my Readwise/Read Later feeds down based on usefulness/actionable in my life and quality. My priorities are for data sources to expand my 'reality tunnel', to provide unique insights (not an echo chamber), and to remove a lot of the 'noise' of the day-to-day information overload. I'm considering what those sources might be. If you have a moment, I'd appreciate your thoughts, advice, and links to any writings or videos that speak to this similar goal and how others have done it. Thanks in advance!

Nick Milo said:

The noise is deafening, but I promise to focus on the high-value signal.

I'm seeking to reduce the noise, and increase the signal of my Reader feeds.

I was just diagnosed with osteoporosis which doesn't come as any surprise given that I've lived with severe arthritis all my life.
I have some treatments in process including an infusion (reclast?)
I am 65 and have a history of some significant accidents including being hit by a car as a small child which likely accelerated the condition.
I've also been on opioid pain meds for many years. I have been in the process of stopping these in an effort to see how much pain I can handle. My life is a lot less active in the last 15 years so it seems quite doable at this stage. My entire family died around 2008 and I don't have near the responsibilities that I had in the past.
I have read that these drugs can also accelerate the condition.
But they were necessary and I have no regrets.
It's just depressing and just wanted to share.

This is a thread for everyone to share their personal story. But I'll start with mine.

I was never an obese child. I was always borderline overweight, but I was never at risk for being unhealthy. At 15 I even managed to lose some weight when I did go into the overweight category. And then I graduated high school. I ended up gaining thirty pounds before starting college, and the weight just kept on piling up. Ending with me gaining over 120 pounds, and being over 300 pounds. I was 17 during this time period. I ended up losing quite a bit of weight, down to 218 during the summer following my first year. But I ended up gaining it back and could not go back down.

By the time I graduated college I was back up almost to my original weight. Unfortunately for me, I graduated in Spring of 2020. Right when the pandemic started. This just caused my weight to climb up even more. Even worse, I finally looked in the mirror and realized that my hair was thinning. This was an easier fix: Dutasteride. Got on that pill and that started growing my hair. You can read more about my struggle with that here. My eating was another ball game.

In late 2021, after being diagnosed with pre-diabetes, I decided to lose some weight. I did Keto, not because I felt like that was the only way to lose weight, but because I had read that was the best diet to reverse pre-diabetes. I did that for three months and it did indeed crushed my A1C number, and I lost a fair amount of weight. The problem was that when I got off the diet I gained a lot of weight back. Not all of it, but enough to make a difference. Keto was not a sustainable diet, but on top of that my thought process was "when this ends I'm gonna eat this I'm gonna eat that."

One day I take a pretty hardcore edible. Weed has an anxious effect on me and constantly makes me reflect on my own life and how unhappy I am with it. But this one time it made me realize how much of what was wrong with my life, or how much of what I did not like about my life was connected to my weight. And how many insecurities me being obese gave me. And how it was holding me back from doing what I wanted to do. It also made me realize why I used food as a coping mechanism, and it made me come to terms with the fact that on some level I had an addiction to food.

So that was actually very helpful, and I was able to move on, and actually commit. It helped me to recognize the signs of overeating, and made me pause whenever I would grab something to eat. I would eventually also start lifting weights and focusing on eating a lot of protein. And that helped me lose fat more than Keto ever did. Just the consistency of that was a lot better and honestly easier than the incredibly restrictive diet Keto is. I still struggle with food. I can't really eat chips, or popcorn, because I will finish the whole bag whether I want to or not. But it's gotten slightly easier, at the very least I've gotten better at trying to avoid things like that.

It's completely altered the way that I look. I just recently saw some family that hadn't seen me in a while, and they did not recognize me. My face is much more visible now. When I would get high I would look in the mirror and not recognize myself but now I do. Part of that problem is that I hadn't actually seen myself properly in a mirror since high school until this recent weight loss. So I was just completely delusional, by choice, about what I looked like. I look at old pictures and go "damn that's how I really was huh."

Now that I'm close to being the same weight I was back in high school, I feel more like me. I feel like I look more like how I perceived myself. I'm not scared to look in the mirror anymore. I'm not scared to take pictures anymore. I'm not scared to try on clothes anymore.

What's really been a trip is the fact that people find me attractive again. I don't want to sound conceited, but I am in fact not ugly. But my face was hidden under the weight. So for years nobody really found me attractive, and that's fair now that I've seen pictures of myself from that time (on top of me having no confidence back then). But now they do again. And it's going to take a little bit of getting used to, but damn it feels good. It feels good to finally date, to have the confidence to go out. It feels good for people to think that I'm 19 instead of thinking that I'm 30.

And I feel so much younger. I'm still in my early 20s, but before now I felt old. Like I felt like my body was falling apart. With how much my hips hurt, with how much my knees hurt, how slow I was. I remember when I was 20 my ankle hurt so much. There was like so much pressure on it and it would not pop. And then when I finally did pop it I had to continually pop it to feel relief. That's gone now. My joints pop a normal amount now rather than the excessive amount. I can crouch, I can get up from the floor, I can walk longer easily. Stuff that I should have been doing this entire time that felt almost impossible to do.

It's like I've been rejuvenated. Like I've been given a second chance to enjoy my youth.

And I really really don't want to mess it up again.

Symptoms from my diagnoses of bipolar 2 and social anxiety disorder kept me from working, socializing, forming relationships, and living independently for more than a decade.

I worked my ass off to improve my wellness, and for the past 6 years I have worked as a Peer Support Specialist for 2 different public agencies. I tell my story to other people with mental health and substance issues as part of my work. If anyone’s interested, I’d love to share it here too.

I've done a large amount of research and got a consultation a few months ago, my doctor said I could get PRK as SMILE and LASIK weren't good options for my cornea. As I understand it the results should be very similar, just a longer/more painful recovery time. I've got family who is going to come into town for a week to help me with anything, but I wanted to know if any of you have gone through PRK and had advice or an experience to share.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

About a year ago I was approaching 200 lbs. I work from home since pre-pandemic. I used to bike to an office but since then, I’ve moved somewhere less biking friendly. My strategy to tackle weight was intermittent fasting. And it was generally working for ~10 lbs and I stopped weighing myself for a year. And shirts were not fitting me, and then I learned the weight had come all back and more.
I knew enough that the fasting was going to do nothing if I was not telling my body to really use anything it stored up. Serendipitously I read about someone with a recumbent bike under their standing desk, and gaming, they’d wrack up the miles. I realized I needed that setup. I’m someone who just hates to go out of my way for working out.

Found one that was literally a desk chair with a bike under it and ordered it. I went from ultra sedentary to light exercise for ~4 hours a day. I’ve had it for about 2 weeks, and this thing is great. I’m listening to my body and not trying to do it too hard (for those who are concerned). Without every really trying to sprint I’ve been doing 40 miles a week-day. On the 4th of July I tried to see how far I could go biking all day. When I started I could not go anymore at 80 miles. Last weekend I easily knocked out 70 miles. The big thing is breaks. I’m not on a real bike, so there is no problem in taking a 5 minute break to knockout dishes or something. I don’t know if I trust the machine telling me I’m burning ~1,000 cals on my 40 miles, but I know what I am doing is healthy and I’m curious how my body will feel in 6 months or a year.

How do my legs feel? Oddly enough, during the day or after the work out, they’re beat. They seem to feel better by the time I’m ready to ride in the evening so no rest days yet. I’m shocked how much the leg fatigue really goes away once I start riding and focus on whatever is on my PC. Most of the discomfort is really from my bum. It has gone away generally though.
An odd risk I had to solve for myself was that upon pushing away from my desk while on my bike, I nearly topped my standing desk over. This was solved by well-placed PVC pipes and padding locked between the desk and the wall.

What bike do I recommend?
The budget version: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B004O6TXVS/
The one I have: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C8MVYLLT (but from their original website)
A cushion that the I book marked when I was doing research: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01EBDV9BU

When I look up recumbent biking exercises, it’s kind of funny. It’s often recommended for the elderly because it’s potentially such a low intense workout. It’s great in a long duration. I would actually feel guilty spending this much time at the gym, but this method rocks. I have not worked out for this long since playing a Highschool sport. I won’t ever be shaped like a teenager again, but I can work towards it.

I figured I would help kick off this new subgroup by starting a discussion on how people with ADHD try to manage it.

I had a late diagnosis a couple years ago as an adult, and I have been working with a counselor to develop some behavioral techniques (in addition to medication). Not all of them stick, which in my experiences is the primary challenge of this disorder, but I've had good results when I do use them.

Primarily, I have a calendar where I put reminders and plan things out. If I have parts of a project I need to get done, I lay those out and assign them to certain days of the week. Working in academia, I live my life a semester at a time and this helps me reevaluate certain goals and it feels reasonable to me to plan out a few months at a time.

One thing I struggle with when it comes to planning is coming up with accurate estimates of how much time it might take to spend something. This was always a big obstacle in my way when it came to planning things out before - I wanted to know the exact time on how long it took to do something so that my schedule would be perfect. My counselor suggested that I come up with an initial estimate of how long something should take based off my intuition, and then double it (e.g. if I think a task should take 30 minutes, plot it out for 60 minutes of my day). This has been great for me because usually it's a win-win. Often, my initial assessment is underestimating how long something takes, so by accounting for slippage in time I can better chunk out my day. On the other hand, if I do get it done sooner I can pat myself on the back and I now have extra time in the day to get other things done.

I wanna find better ways of trying to stay on track with habits. I've tried some different apps and none are working too well. Recently I picked up Sunsama which has helped in terms of reviewing the day and looking at subtasks, but as I've gotten busy with experiments I've kind of lost track of that. What are some things that you do to accommodate the way your brains works?

The past few years I have been gradually starting to use ASMR to relax. I have had increasing bouts of anxiety and can't take too many kinds of medications since I am on blood thinners. So I rely on different relaxation methods to get me through.
I am fond of shoe and purse tapping but can't take mouth noises. Actually most tapping sounds seem to be the best fit for my ears. Maybe the occasional crinkling here and there. Perhaps even some whispered talking but I prefer just the sounds.
Some of these folks really go out in their productions. It's been amazing watching the evolution over the years.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I have taken supplements, but they are not very effective. Honestly, I don't want to rely on medication when our bodies are perfectly suitable with enough sunlight exposure.

I've been researching this for a while and can't find sources that show the difference according to latitude. I stupidly didn't bookmark what I read so what I say is based on what I've read but can't link to any of it :(.

• I gather there is research that around noon time sun exposure (e.g. 11am-3pm) results in greater production. The skin's processes are optimised for that time.
• I am very aware of the risks of skin cancer.
• I read in the UK about 13 minutes for 3 days a week, just between April and September is adequate for vitamin D levels year round.
• I live on the tropic of cancer so I'm expecting perhaps 7-10 minutes. Anything specific to that sub-tropical latitude would be greatly appreciated.

All advice is welcome, but links that I can read, compare and digest myself especially for different latitudes round the world would be perfect.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

So it is 80 degrees fahrenheit here today which usually would not be an issue for me but today I was too hot and sweaty. I am perimenopausal (49 years old) and I knew that could mess with heat tolerance. What I had not realized until today is that heat intolerance is also a side effect of many blood pressure medicines, antidepressants and allergy meds. And I am on all of those now.

I have just ordered some gadget that is a fan that goes around my neck and can be recharged via USB which seemed worth trying. And of course I will drink plenty of water, and try to stay in air conditioning whenever I can. Any other advice on how to deal with increased sensitivity to heat / higher heat intolerance? It is still early enough in the summer that the worst summer heat here is yet to come, so having some more tips might help me. Thanks!

Hey all, my partner is newly paraplegic post spine surgery and while he's been disabled through our ten years together this is new. He's using a power wheelchair and has to transfer by Hoyer lift. And in the six days since he was discharged from the rehab (PT and OT) hospital he's been to the ER twice. We have home health set up. But all of a sudden my life is a lot more... Stressful is understating it. He's going through his own emotional journey and getting support so I was hoping to find some connections, suggestions and the like here.

Right now I'm feeling a ton of pressure not to let any of the various balls I'm juggling drop. Something that feels unsustainable, particularly with my ADHD. I feel like I'm only getting this far due to stress compensating for my lack of medication (it's packed from our recent move, I'll find it or get a new script I just haven't yet). My partner's in a rush to get a wheelchair van and I don't know if we're making a good purchase and it feels like everything has to be handled right now but also for the rest of our lives.

Are there devices that are must haves? Things I need to know about wheelchair vans? Empathy from fellow caretakers?

I have been running for 10 years. Since October 2019 I have run everyday without missing a single day. During the week I have little time and run 2-3 miles but on the weekends I try for 5-6 miles. I have made the occasional 10+ mile runs and find that at some point around mile 7 it becomes "How far can I really go today if I get through this mile." The only motivator I have is not breaking my daily run streak, nothing fancy. I know others have motivators to get into shape for a marathon or other event. What's your running motivation?