Something I have been thinking about lately is how sexual content online seems to be proliferated and normalized much more than it used to be. I'll give a couple of examples.

While I do not use the big social media sites (Instagram, Facebook, TikTok) very often, I've seen questionable content while others are scrolling, as well as conversations both online and offline with others who do use them. Nearly all of these sites contain profiles of people who are primarily there to market an OnlyFans account or similar. And these profiles are pushed to various demographics, seemingly moreso to males.

Reddit has a very questionable history with this type of content. But outside of that, any subreddit that allows submission of photos of people will often include these models trying to promote themselves, and they frequently make it to the top of the subreddit. (Some reddit users make fun of this in subreddits such as r/UNBGBBIIVCHIDCTIICBG, which stands for "Upvoted Not Because Girl, But Because It Is Very Cool; However, I Do Concede That I Initially Clicked Because Girl").

Twitch is a livestreaming platform that primarily hosts streamers who are playing video games. Streaming other events or "just chatting" has grown in popularity, which I have no complaints about. But there has been a lot of controversy about sexual content on the platform. To address this to some degree, Twitch added a "Pools, Hot Tubs, and Beaches" category for people who are streaming in that specific context. But OnlyFans models do not stick to that category, and can easily be found in "Just Chatting." And I can personally say that regardless of how many times I select "Not Interested" on these streams, I continue to get suggestions for them.

Even generic chat applications (such as WhatsApp and Discord) are plagued with bot accounts that are either representative of an actual model or part of a scam, but in both cases, try to lure users in with sexual content.

I do want to say I have no issue with adult content when it is in the appropriate venue. Sites dedicated to pornography are completely fine for consenting adults. What I take issue with is how this content has expanded far beyond dedicated sites.

Society has reached a point where we hand off internet-connected devices to children at a very young age. Chromebooks are used in schools very early in education, and smartphones are given to kids early in life. It already seems to be common knowledge that social media use results in self-image issues in youth. These issues will likely be accelerated by social media not only showing a false image of how people live their lives but also the lengths they go to appear sexually appealing.

I'm not proposing some overreaching "save the children" censorship legislation is needed. But it's hard to imagine how this trend can be turned around. It produces a ton of clicks, which is all these user-posted content sites (and advertisers) care about. Is there anything that can be done, or is this just the new internet?

What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

Hey folks,

My wife and I saw a great flights deal on Delta and bought tickets for March 2025. We know that we have day 8 in Hobbiton just before we leave (which is a solid 50% of the reason she wants to visit New Zealand), but we wondered what else we should plan on for the first 7 days! I bet we spend a couple days in Auckland on the way in, and a bit of the evening of the 8th day, so anything local is great too.

We like a mix of (moderate) outdoorsy things, cultural/historic things, nice city things, etc. We definitely at least one day at the beach (preferably with a nice restaurant nearby) and are taking advice about where to do so. We will have a rental car beginning on Day 2 or 3, and would love to explore as much of the North Island as we can!

Any "can't misses"? Any local/regional museums or zoos/aquaria that are exceptional? We are absolutely willing to drive even as far south as Wellington, but prefer more days of smaller driving, so we don't just have a full day of driving in the middle there.

Much appreciated!

Recently I’ve been growing dissatisfied with my current workflow (Obsidian and iA) and looking to try something new, and someone recommended emacs, as long as I was up for the challenge. I figure it can’t hurt to try, and if I don’t implement it, well, I’ll have learned something.

I’m fairly comfortable with CLIs, but will likely use a GUI, and will be using on a Mac.

Anyone have advice for a total novice?

I'm in a decade-long predicament related to the management of a somewhat complex website for my publishing business, and I'd appreciate your advice. For context:

1. I joined the company as an original founder about 15 years ago. My initial roles mostly dealt with accounting, finance, sales, account management, etc. -- really, anything and everything I could help out with. I offered to take ownership of our website since I had a fair amount of web design and programming experience.
2. The original version of our website was a patchwork of PHP scripts from back in the days before Composer. I was inexperienced and didn't know anything about frameworks, etc. so I just started adding code.
3. Over the years, I built homebrew versions of user authentication, a backend (CMS, CRM, etc.), and our front-facing website (full-stack, from cloud hosting to CSS and everything in between). As the story goes, it became a spaghetti code mess that was only maintainable by me.
4. Realizing that I'd created a mess, my next long-term project was to slowly start transitioning the entire backend over to the Symfony framework, including many/most of the homebuilt components such as auth. This probably took 5 years in earnest. This way, I could at least begin to have conversations about getting outside help.
5. The other founder passed away unexpectedly, and I've found myself not having enough time to dedicate to the website. I can work on it here and there and patch it up when things break, but my fear is that we're going to become stale.
6. I've had several conversations with individuals and web development companies in various capacities over the years. These conversations ranged from "sure, I can help out with front-end stuff" to "we would like to rebuild your website from scratch using (insert popular CMS) and then manage it for the low cost of (insert high cost)".

Right now, all of the coding goes through me because it's the cheapest option (plus all of the context above). I'd like to explore delegating or outsourcing it again, but I don't know where the happy medium is as far as what needs to stay in-house.

Just to give an idea of the complexity, as it goes well beyond what you would think a publisher needs, here are some of the features:

• User auth/database with tens of thousands of users
• Single sign-on that connects those users to several other platforms seamlessly
• Content authoring
• Several "microsite" type pages on the front end that require their own CSS/JS needs
• Some unique features that were built because we couldn't find suitable alternatives, such as a webinar player that automatically generates certificates and stores them for the user, watermarked PDF downloads to include user information (i.e. to prevent piracy), etc.
• CSS from the Bootstrap 3 era that has been modified and bolted onto over the years
• Jquery stuff from way back in the day
• and on, and on, and on

To do things right, I would think that I need a server admin, a Symfony/PHP expert, and a front-end expert. But we're talking about what - hundreds of thousands of dollars per year? We can't afford that.

In my mind, an ideal situation looks like this:

• I am still able to see, modify, and keep control of our codebase (Git)
• Hosting is managed. This is where my second biggest* fear lies, in that I know enough server admin to be dangerous, but I lose sleep knowing that an intrusion is inevitable and there are smarter people than me that can help prevent one.
• I can assign out projects (e.g. we want to upgrade to PHP ## and Symfony ##, we want to redesign a page/template/etc., we want to implement SAML and connect it to another platform, etc.)

*My biggest fear is that, since I hold the keys to everything related to this website, if I am unavailable (or get hit by a bus) then I leave the business in a REALLY bad place.

Can anyone offer any advice on navigating this hornet's nest?

This is something I've been thinking on-and-off for years. I'm an ideologically driven person. I want to do good, create a more equal and better world. However, reality -being as is- makes this very hard to accomplish. This sometimes causes much strife and suffering for me, as I am demoralized by lack of, slow pace of, or loss of progress.

Often in times like this, I turn to what other people think. One of the most frequent advices is about "accepting the world". In my experience, this advice almost exclusively came from people who I see as subscribing to conformism. They too are of course people, and they are bothered by things too, but they don't try to effect change.

This is why I've had an incredibly difficult time with this widespread advice. At times I even felt as if I'm pathologically attached to my drive to effect change. Especially at the start of this questioning, I felt like it. I felt as if I was a spiritual masochist. But in time I realized how much meaning and eudaimonic happiness it brings to me. I've also realized how much conformism and "hedonism as the only legitimate way of happiness" diffused into everything. Many people can't seem to fathom struggling for a cause as a fulfilling and happy process, because their interpretation of happiness is based exclusively on a pleasure-principle.

However, I still felt like this advice had some kernel of truth. Today, I realized what I think is a better way of interpreting it: accepting the world doesn't mean giving up on effecting any significant change in wider society or the world, it just means you're better off accepting your feelings.

Put another way, the conditions of the world creates these emotional responses in you. Whether you strike back or not, you should not deny yourself the opportunity to feel these responses. These often include feelings of anxiety, fear, loss, hurt, loneliness, sadness, etc. When handling ideological topics, these can be buried under anger. While anger is not unhealthy or bad, and can be motivating to do good, it can also sometimes deny a person the chance to feel the situation to the fullest. This is what I mean by accepting the world. It means accepting what it evokes in you.

I decided to share this, because I think these topics are mostly handled from a perspective I see as too one-sided and alien (to people like me). They are often filled with advice that tells driven people to stop being driven, telling them to give up what causes them pain and instead to focus on personal things, enjoy a movie, etc. Basically telling them to be someone different. But that's not what makes them happy! They just need to figure out how to healthily engage with what drives them. And I think this is an important part of it.

There is, of course, nothing wrong with taking some time off, or reducing or stopping certain habits, learning to take care of yourself. But every time I read the "acceptance" argument, I was left completely unsatisfied, and even irritated, because I was feeling as if people were telling me to become an orange. Not only was it impossible, they didn't even realize how much these things meant to me. They were basically telling me to give up, and that -for me- was unacceptable at an existential level. More to the point, my ideological drive is a core part of my personality that enables me to cope with living with depression and numerous physical illnesses. It's a key motivator that energizes me to do things, even though I often feel like not doing anything. Without this drive, I'm a much less happy person. So, it was an advice that wasn't even remotely suitable for me, because our personalities and motivations in life were extremely different.

So, if there are others like me here, I thought I should share my two cents on this, and hope that it helps someone see things a bit differently. If you've had experiences with these things too, you're welcome to share them :)