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    1. How do you distinguish between masculinity and toxic masculinity?

      This has been a thread I’ve wanted to make for a while but I’ve hesitated to for fear of it going badly. Recent events, however, have made me think it’s a topic that’s we can’t really afford to...

      This has been a thread I’ve wanted to make for a while but I’ve hesitated to for fear of it going badly. Recent events, however, have made me think it’s a topic that’s we can’t really afford to ignore.

      When people read the phrase “toxic masculinity”, some see a clear collection of bad behaviors or mindsets that exist independent of men as a whole, while some see an indictment of an entire gender or identity. I’ve talked to men who have admitted to not knowing how to be masculine without being “toxic”because they can’t see a clear line where one ends and the other begins.

      Thus, I’m interested in exploring what specifically gets defined as “toxic masculinity” and how we distinguish it from neutral or positive masculinity.

      Part of what has kept me from asking this is that I see in people here two different experiences that I fear might collide in bad ways. I know we have people here (myself included) who have been directly harmed by behaviors and mindsets that would fall under the umbrella of “toxic masculinity”. Likewise, I know we have people here who have been harmed by an over-application of the phrase — being seen or treated as “toxic” simply for being men and thus being denied the dignity of their own identity. Giving credence to one experience can feel like it overrides the other.

      Even just the phrase itself is the kind of thing that often divides people into camps and causes conflict, and I’m hoping we can avoid that here. (Though, to be honest, Tildes always impresses me with how we handle difficult topics, so I’m not sure where my worry is coming from). My goal for this topic is for everyone to have the opportunity to speak openly to convey understood truths and lived experiences in ways that maintain dignity for everyone involved.

      The guiding question is about distinguishing masculinity from toxic masculinity, but answers don’t have to be limited to that. I’m interested in hearing about people’s relationship with masculinity in general, both in people who identify with it and those who don’t.

      29 votes
    2. What was the last game you played that really surprised you?

      “Surprise” can be anything from an unexpected plot twist to a novel mechanic to simply liking a game you weren’t expecting to like. What surprised you about the game, and why? Please mark any...

      “Surprise” can be anything from an unexpected plot twist to a novel mechanic to simply liking a game you weren’t expecting to like.

      What surprised you about the game, and why?

      Please mark any spoilers. Code below:

      <details>
      <summary>[Game Title] Spoilers</summary>
      
      [Spoiler text goes here]
      </details>
      

      Results:

      [Game Title] Spoilers

      [Spoiler text goes here]

      19 votes
    3. Weekly US politics news and updates thread - week of August 2

      This thread is posted weekly - please try to post all relevant US political content in here, such as news, updates, opinion articles, etc. Extremely significant events may warrant a separate...

      This thread is posted weekly - please try to post all relevant US political content in here, such as news, updates, opinion articles, etc. Extremely significant events may warrant a separate topic, but almost all should be posted in here.

      This is an inherently political thread; please try to avoid antagonistic arguments and bickering matches. Comment threads that devolve into unproductive arguments may be removed so that the overall topic is able to continue.

      6 votes
    4. Reddit has banned the misogynistic "Men Going Their Own Way" subreddits r/MGTOW and r/MGTOW2

      AHS: 🦀. 🦀. 🦀. MGTOW and MGTOW2 are banned 🦀. 🦀. 🦀. SRD: r/MGTOW has been banned r/MGTOW was quarantined back in January 2020 after being cited in an FBI prosecution brief during the sentencing of...

      AHS: 🦀. 🦀. 🦀. MGTOW and MGTOW2 are banned 🦀. 🦀. 🦀.
      SRD: r/MGTOW has been banned

      r/MGTOW was quarantined back in January 2020 after being cited in an FBI prosecution brief during the sentencing of a U.S. Coast Guard officer planning a domestic terrorist attack.

      37 votes
    5. What programming/technical projects have you been working on?

      This is a recurring post to discuss programming or other technical projects that we've been working on. Tell us about one of your recent projects, either at work or personal projects. What's...

      This is a recurring post to discuss programming or other technical projects that we've been working on. Tell us about one of your recent projects, either at work or personal projects. What's interesting about it? Are you having trouble with anything?

      5 votes
    6. How has the pandemic changed you?

      I won't give a preamble for this one like I normally do in my ask topics, as I don't want to prime anyone's responses. Feel free to interpret the question however you like, and answer with...

      I won't give a preamble for this one like I normally do in my ask topics, as I don't want to prime anyone's responses. Feel free to interpret the question however you like, and answer with whatever you feel is relevant.

      35 votes
    7. What have you been watching / reading this week? (Anime/Manga)

      What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was...

      What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

      If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

      7 votes
    8. What sports matches have you watched recently?

      I'm making this post because I haven't been able to find decent (English) articles for some of the matches I've watched, so that should probably be the focus of this thread. If you can find good...

      I'm making this post because I haven't been able to find decent (English) articles for some of the matches I've watched, so that should probably be the focus of this thread. If you can find good articles for a match you've watched, post them in the group instead.

      7 votes
    9. Fortnightly Programming Q&A Thread

      General Programming Q&A thread! Ask any questions about programming, answer the questions of other users, or post suggestions for future threads. Don't forget to format your code using the triple...

      General Programming Q&A thread! Ask any questions about programming, answer the questions of other users, or post suggestions for future threads.

      Don't forget to format your code using the triple backticks or tildes:

      Here is my schema:
      
      ```sql
      CREATE TABLE article_to_warehouse (
        article_id   INTEGER
      , warehouse_id INTEGER
      )
      ;
      ```
      
      How do I add a `UNIQUE` constraint?
      
      6 votes
    10. What did you do this weekend?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      7 votes
    11. Writing Club #3—"Madness" (Submissions)

      Shakespeare's birthday is observed today. Thank you, verily, for sharing your writing! Please post your efforts below, with an introduction and/or questions for your readers. Here are the...

      Shakespeare's birthday is observed today. Thank you, verily, for sharing your writing!

      Please post your efforts below, with an introduction and/or questions for your readers.
      Here are the guidelines, again.

      8 votes