The last time I cried was probably like 3 years ago. I have no idea why. I know that not being able to cry can be a result of depression, or some sort of trauma, or having to suppress your emotions for a long time - but I never experienced any of that. I just suddenly stopped being able to cry and it sucks because crying is a great emotional outlet and sometimes I really feel like I want to cry but just can't for some reason.

Has anyone else dealt with the same thing?

Hello, I'm looking for books written by professionals that would further my language and understanding of emotions, in order to connect with my emotions on a deeper level. An example would be "Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect", but it doesn't have to be about neglect. I just want to understand and experience the emotional spectrum better, so any book (written by a mental health professional) that would help with that is good. If possible, I prefer shorter books, around 100-250 pages, but it's not a hard requirement.

This might be a strange topic, and I'm not sure if others can relate, or if I am 100% strange here. Feel free to remove(?) this if it's not relevant.. This is just something I'd love to learn the experiences of others about and get some ideas, as I imagine everyone is so different.

So, I have a very annoying problem: I don't experience emotions very strongly (e.g. while some folks get moved by films or art, or maybe get worked up with joy or frustration in life, I seem to be far more emotionally neutral, even in very extreme situations.) This can be very useful (emotions can be misleading and lead to poor decisions), but also problematic and limiting (emotions can feel nice, help with creativity, it's a good way to express love to people, etc).

Occasionally, I do feel little bits of emotion, but they tend to go away very quickly. I really wish I felt more, but I don't know how.

I'm curious about the emotional experiences of others. Do you get naturally emotional? Could you cry from watching a movie? For those like myself who have underwhelming emotions - what does make you feel emotional? Do you have any tips or tricks for feeling more emotional, or, hanging on to emotions when you do get them? Has anyone ever been able to "overcome" this issue of not feeling emotions?

Thanks for any insight.

EDIT: If this is not the correct group for such a topic, please do let me know, and I will remove it.

It's something I've struggled for a long time to do in text conversations. People will often think I'm mad when talking in a way that I think is perfectly normal or that I'm a brick wall while discussing disagreements and well, that can't be fun. I often have to reassure certain people that it's not the case.

Sometimes I try to show how I'm feeling through emotions or more "fluffy" language but I feel like that's too excessive and feels kinda fake to me?

It's also something I've more recently struggled with because I'm trying to write personally on my blog and I'm not exactly sure how to convey my feelings other than stating it like a robot like "This makes me mad" or "That's depressing" or "It makes me feel great".

It feels off to me and maybe it's just a me problem but I think that's also because I write the same way I speak and so, it just sounds strange.

I don't know, this post is rambly and I've been wanting to write something like this in the last few days but I just have to push enter at some point.

After reading a thread on AskReddit requesting songs that made people cry, I thought about my favorite music and realized that most of the songs that made me cry were because they were uplifting in one way or another. So here I am today, asking you this: what songs move you to tears because of positive emotions? Here are a few of mine:

The Beatles - Let It Be. It's almost embarrassing to put this one first, but a simple three word phrase has never been filled with so much meaning. "Let it be" is practically my motto, and it's the philosophy which has most helped to steer me towards sanity. The music accompanying the lyrics just resonates with my heartstrings and it always makes me feel relieved after listening.

Yoko Kanno - Gotta Knock a Little Harder. People often describe music they like as being written for them. To me, this song feels like my very essence was put into sound. Its a song about breaking free of depression and loneliness. The thing I love about it is how honest it is; breaking through that door is brutally difficult. I love how there isn't an extra verse telling you how much better the narrator's life is after breaking through the door (or even that they made it through), instead implying it through choral swells and a little bit of the listener's imagination.

Arto Lindsay - Counting the Roses. This one may be cheating a little, because it's really the context of the song that makes me cry. It was written for a video game called D2, where a tragic character named Kimberly wrote the lyrics after a particularly terrible day. While the song is beautiful by itself, what affects me is the concept that it represents: even in an ugly, poisonous, depressing world, pure and beautiful things can still be found.

This is a tricky personal conundrum of mine. I'll try to articulate it clearly.

I believe in compassion, and I want to live in harmony with compassionate tendencies inside. But at the same time, in the act of extending compassion, there appears to be an in-built power gradient: the "giver" is somehow in an "advantaged" position, and the receiver a more disadvantaged one.

An example. I was once in a fast-food restaurant, waiting to order, and I saw the order-taker was obviously new and very nervous and skittish at her job. So after I placed my order I expressed how much I appreciate her service and that I thought she was doing a good job. It was truly what I wanted to say, and I thought she took this well, like, she looked more relaxed as she beamed.

But then there was a power gradient. I gave her something that she wouldn't/couldn't have given me. She was the more distressed one, and this power gradient emphasized that. I don't mean that bystanders were made more conscious of her distress. I mean, it had the potential to make me more conscious of my privilege and her her lack thereof.

And I'm aversive to power. I can be highly sceptical and critical of power. I don't feel easy to have power over someone else. I have had troubled relations with power figures in my life. I easily confuse the natural, benign activation of power with the reflexive, defensive, "shields-up" reaction that I often find myself in. To explain a bit, the latter is really a form of anxiety, perhaps a trauma from experiences of hypercompetition, isolation, and emotional neglect in the past.

In the end, I thirst after commonality, equality, brothersisterhood, close and meaningful contact with others as they are, as human beings, on level ground, side by side, sharing the common condition in our vulnerabilities... But there's this aspect of my character, i.e. the tendency to get tense and look for a "higher ground" and occupy there, just to be on the safe (more powerful!) side. There's this haughty, difficult-to-approach, high-brow me, that I feel get in the way.

I fee sad and somewhat confused about this. I think I'm partly venting, partly asking about your similar experiences. Please consider this topic fairly open-ended. If you have something to say about it, I'm eager to listen to you.

Thanks!

There is a tendency nowadays for public officials to characterise loneliness as a public health crisis. I agree that it's a pervasive condition. However, the human condition is not fully medicalizable. I believe we can speak about it just as who we are, according to our full experience, in our capacity as first-person narrator, as witness, as who are the closest to their own struggles.

But it can be really hard to be open, and hence vulnerable, to difficult emotions. In times of distress, our own internal communication can get jammed, and it natural that opening up to the external world may feel as if an insurmountable difficulty.

Nevertheless, the great force of nature, evolution, has given us the ability to listen and be listened to. Its greatest strength may be manifest at the time of greatest need.

Which is why I'd like to have this thread. This thread is for you, if you're feeling lonely at the time, or if you want to share your experience with loneliness, or if you would like to give support to our community members, or just to speak up, or just to listen.

Let us tune in to each other's expressions in caring consideration. We don't have to be perfect in self-expression or empathy -- this is not a contest. This is a fireside chat, a place to rest, reflect, and understand, before moving on.

Are you willing to join the conversation?