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    1. Have you ever been outed?

      This is a tough question. I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad or relive trauma, but I want to give people a space to talk about it and share their stories if they need to. Have you ever been...

      This is a tough question.

      I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad or relive trauma, but I want to give people a space to talk about it and share their stories if they need to.

      • Have you ever been outed by someone else/accident/circumstance?
      • What happened?
      • Who/what outed you?
      • Why?
      • How did it turn out?

      Also, while some people will undoubtedly have serious answers to this, I also think there are some stories that are less grave and more lighthearted or positive. Those are fine to share too.

      31 votes
    2. What server location should I use for a VPN?

      I'm asking "I" in the sense that I'd personally like an answer to this question, but really this is more about using VPNs in general. Currently, I just use the server with the lowest latency...

      I'm asking "I" in the sense that I'd personally like an answer to this question, but really this is more about using VPNs in general.

      Currently, I just use the server with the lowest latency because that gives me the least friction.

      However, thinking about the GDPR in the EU, or California's data privacy protections: should I be strategically choosing a server based on those? Is there any benefit to having my traffic routed through a jurisdiction like that, or does that not really matter?

      EDIT: To further clarify: will all the different websites out there log less data or treat my data differently if they believe my traffic is coming from the EU/California?

      31 votes
    3. What have you been watching / reading this week? (Anime/Manga)

      What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was...

      What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

      If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

      8 votes
    4. TV Tuesdays Free Talk

      Warning: this post may contain spoilers

      Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

      Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

      7 votes
    5. What did you do this week (and weekend)?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      3 votes
    6. How often are you eating plant based meals?

      I'm not strictly talking about adherent vegan or vegetarian lifestyles, though those certainly do count towards this discussion. I feel like there's an absolute plethora of good, different reasons...

      I'm not strictly talking about adherent vegan or vegetarian lifestyles, though those certainly do count towards this discussion.

      I feel like there's an absolute plethora of good, different reasons to reduce animal based proteins. The big one for most people right now is obviously cost. Simple meals like meatloaf or stroganoff simply aren't worth it (to me) to make with beef when beef is $8/lb for 70/30. But lots of other reasons like the environment, animal welfare, and health consciousness exist.

      As far as a lifestyle goes, it definitely feels like the winds have shifted considerably. While IRL here in the southeastern US you do still have those "I'll eat 1 steak for every vegan who cries about it" types, online, that type of talk is extremely cringe in most contexts and circles. Now I just feel like when people say they are vegan, there isn't an instant visceral reaction from everyone like there used to be. I recall not too long ago, everyone's favorite joke was "how do you know someone is vegan? Because they'll tell you!" when all that person did was decline a burger. In fact, quite the opposite seems to happen today. There's a lot of "good for you/I wish I could do that" type comments. Just seems like things are shifting culturally.

      I'm not personally vegan or vegetarian, but I have drastically reduced my animal products. I make black bean burgers instead of regular burgers. I make my fried rice without any meat. I make a lot of curry that just happens to be vegan. I just bought groceries for the next 2 weeks and the total amount of animal products is 1 pound of ground pork, 1 pound of scallops, and 8oz of mozzarella cheese. That's it. Years ago I would eat animal products pretty much for every meal.

      Is it just me? Or have most people reduced their consumption too? It's hard to tell because everything at the grocery store is "protein protein protein" and there's a lot of social media content of body builders eating a dozen eggs and 3 rotisserie chickens for dinner and that type of content, but I'm not sure how much of that actually exists in real life. Seems too expensive for the average person.

      41 votes
    7. Invite request spam problem - vet through other social media?

      For most of the history of Tildes, if someone came across the site and decided they wanted to join, but didn't know anyone already on, they could email Deimos with an invite request. However, with...

      For most of the history of Tildes, if someone came across the site and decided they wanted to join, but didn't know anyone already on, they could email Deimos with an invite request. However, with the rise of LLMs, the noise-to-signal ratio has become so high this is no longer a way to join Tildes - explanation by Deimos: https://tildes.net/~tildes/1vl3/is_there_any_interest_in_building_a_tildes_successor#comment-if6r

      I've read the recent discussions on Tildes being maintained as is and not actively grown, but I think most of us believe the community is up for many more years of enjoying each other's company, and would like to pick up a few more members along the way if they seek us out. That just requesting to join isn't possible anymore makes me a little sad.

      I had the thought that larger sites are able to invest more resources into spam account filtering, many of us have active accounts on other social media sites (or other types of sites with community interactions), and I speculate that almost everyone who finds tildes and is interested in joining has already been active in some other online community. Some of us Tilderinos could post here our handles in other communities, and offer to consider sharing one of our invite requests to Tildes if DM'd in our other community. We'd have to reject requests from new accounts, and use some judgement on established ones, but I am thinking having people go through the filtering process those other communities use would reduce the spam requests enough to make it workable.

      What do you guys think?

      21 votes
    8. Save Point: A game deal roundup for the week of August 16

      Add awesome game deals to this topic as they come up over the course of the week! Alternately, ask about a given game deal if you want the community’s opinions: e.g. “What games from this bundle...

      Add awesome game deals to this topic as they come up over the course of the week!

      Alternately, ask about a given game deal if you want the community’s opinions: e.g. “What games from this bundle are most worth my attention?”

      Rules:

      • No grey market sales
      • No affiliate links

      If posting a sale, it is strongly encouraged that you share why you think the available game/games are worthwhile.


      All previous Save Point topics

      If you don’t want to see threads in this series, add save point to your personal tag filters.

      5 votes
    9. Anyone using a DGX Spark?

      The prices have increased, and even before people called it too expensive. I am just wondering - do you have one? What do you use it for? I've been thinking of getting one (as a business expense,...

      The prices have increased, and even before people called it too expensive.

      I am just wondering - do you have one? What do you use it for? I've been thinking of getting one (as a business expense, I guess the price is high, but then again - what other option do you have for compute? renting GPUs is quite expensive, any comparable amount of VRAM is very expensive - ok if you have space and mostly want to do inference, I guess you have better options (3090 or 5090)

      For me, I have just been considering having some more compute available for robotics, finetuning, trying out selfhosted and fine tuned LLMs, among other things. My other setup (M1Pro 32GB and a 1070 Mini) could work for some stuff, but especially for the robotics part it's mostly about NVIDIA...

      Curious about any experiences.

      5 votes