i intended to actually post these like three days ago but that didn't happen because it has to be super fucking late for me to even want to post these and unfortunately they've now aged sufficiently that i categorize them firmly in the "intensely mediocre" column with everything i ever do. unfortunate, tbh. anyways here's stuff:

bűnös

UP AGAINST THE WALL, MOTHERFUCKER—
or i'll shatter your bones
and crush your heart—
to dance with me is to dance
a fine line that wrenches two worlds apart

for on one side there is a hall of saints—
on the other
the brimstone of hell—
and to stay on the side of the hall of saints
is something you'd best do well.

and brave souls that dare toe the line—
that cross it
are mighty thin—
and their ranks are made of anarchists
who commit most grievous sin.

UP AGAINST THE WALL, MOTHERFUCKER—
state your allegiance
to the vaunted line—
or soon you too shall join the ranks
of those who deserve malign.

fáj

when i was seventeen
the panic attacks began.
the nightmares.
the violence. the violence. the violence.

violence is a funny little thing—
insidious, slithering in through one grate
and out the other.
it always begins with little things,
little fantasies in one ear and out the other.
dreams here and there, manufacturing terror and hurt.
invasive thoughts, marching to an intensifying drumbeat.
one offs.

it's not normal to
want to hurt so bad.
it's not normal to
want to cut yourself everywhere,
is it?
to feel those feelings,
to bear them like a cross shackled on your back?
to wish some days you could cut to the bone
even though you're afraid of blood?
to mutilate yourself until you can't feel anymore
even though you know those feelings are irrational?
to wish you could die violently, publicly
even though you're afraid of death?

violence isn't a very funny little thing—
terrifying, inescapable and ever recurring
one night after the other.
it was the little things once,
the little fantasies that used to be but now
consume the dreams, the
waking thoughts, becoming a great crescendo.
every day.

when i was nineteen
the panic attacks were normal.
the nightmares.
the violence.

It can be specific or broad, and it can be aimed at a particular type of person based on your experiences (e.g. people in my city, people with fibromyalgia, etc.) or just people at large.

Also, given that age is a very identifying piece of information, feel free to give a range if you're not comfortable sharing your exact age (e.g. "I'm in my 40s" rather than "I'm 42").

• What advice or wisdom would you give to someone 10 years younger than you?
• What would you have wanted to know 10 years ago that someone older could have shared with you?
• If you'd heard the kind of advice you're giving, would you have listened to it 10 years ago?

Burnt!

You embraced me with your apple-pie grin
as I tumbled through the door caked in sun,
and the larks and the orioles who titter their King George
behind us are snuffed with the slam of the castle gate.
We are alone in the fragrant silence of our shared universe,
your heartbeat against my cheek nuzzles
like the murmur of some public radio presenter.
I float along helplessly like a kitten held by its scruff
until the slasher-scream of a Janet Leigh smoke detector,
brutally gored by the twirling swirling aerial dancers,
beckons you away to some Burning of Washington, 1814,
its desolation likewise impeded by a timely sprinkle.
In the black ash-pile is the monomania of the Cosmos,
circling like a hyena for any vulnerability
to consume everything it touches
so that we all might become dark and vacuous like it.
The cosmos and its baggage are swept away,
its might and vastness no match for a love as true as ours.

This was my attempt at writing a poem in the style of Pamela Miller, a feminist and often zany poet from my native Chicago.

Please let me know what you think.

What are you reading currently? Fiction or non-fiction, any genre, any language! Tell us what you're reading, and talk a bit about it.

Notes

• Sorry for posting late this time round. I had an intense week, and was basically too lazy to post yesterday.

• I will not include a list of past topics in the topic text anymore, given it is redundant with the listing in the wiki. Below you'll find a link to the relevant section in the relevant wiki page instead. If you think this is a bad change, PM me about it; if a lot of you don't like it I might end up reverting this.

• Have a nice weekend!

Previous topics

Previous topics are listed in the wiki.

Since @Deimos has stated he will likely not be restarting the tradition of the Official Daily Tildes Discussions, which is something I and a number of other users greatly enjoyed and miss, I have decided to attempt to take on the responsibility of continuing them unofficially (with his blessing). And since these are not official (so won't be in ~tildes.official, which everyone is subscribed to and probably shouldn't unsubscribe from), I will only be doing them weekly instead of daily, and we now have topic tag filtering (so unofficial weekly discussion can be filtered out), hopefully the people who found the official daily discussions annoying can more easily ignore/hide these unofficial ones.

With the explanation out of the way, on to the topic for this week:

Suggestions/ideas/concerns for future unofficial weekly discussions

I thought it would be appropriate to have the first one of these be a bit of an open-ended, meta-meta discussion on the future of these topics. And to kick things off:

• What would everyone here like to see discussed in these topics in the future? Are there any particular site features (planned, suggested or theoretical), policies (tagging, moderation, etc), or other meta issues/subjects you would like to be the topic in future discussions?

• What would you like us to try to achieve with these discussions? Should we have any specific goals in mind, or should they just be fun brainstorming/theory-crafting/naval-gazing sessions?

• Does anyone have any suggestions for me with regards to how I should handle these discussions? Is there anyone out there who would like to help me with these in some capacity going forwards?

• Does anyone have any concerns regarding these unofficial discussions, and if so, can you think of any ways we can try to address them?

The floor is open, and I am all ears. :)

Tildes Official Docs : Donate to Tildes | Tildes Gitlab : Issues Board

It is was a tedious task to mention users: copy, type, paste. This script makes it a single step: drag and drop any username on to the comment you're composing, and tada! It's there.

Here is the script:

// ==UserScript==
// @name     tildesDragNDropUsernameForMention
// @version  1
// @grant    none
// @namespace   tildes.net
// ==/UserScript==

var userLinks = document.querySelectorAll('a.link-user');

var dragstartHandler = function (event) {
  var text = event.target.innerText;
  if(!text.startsWith('@')){
    text = "@" + text;
  }
  event.dataTransfer.setData("text", text);
  event.dataTransfer.dropEffect = 'copy';
}

userLinks.forEach(function (each) {
  each.setAttribute('draggable', true);
  each.ondragstart = dragstartHandler;
});

Patches welcome!

Edit: remove useless code