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    1. If you were to run for president in your country, what would your platform be?

      I'm Brazilian, and personally (in the most radical, electability-indifferent and honestly meme-y campaign) would go for Bernie with the campaign finance and tax reform but with a platform for...

      I'm Brazilian, and personally (in the most radical, electability-indifferent and honestly meme-y campaign) would go for Bernie with the campaign finance and tax reform but with a platform for civical reform like putting STV as the nomination method for our chamber of deputies and supporting automating or funding new technologies to replace menial labor, like funding lab grown meat to replace all farming companies and labor now or robotics to automate large parts of the industrial and service sectors and use that money saved from not paying wages to people doing bad jobs to fund free universities and better schools/wages/welfare/infrastructure to the people once doing that work, along with adding civics and economics as subjects in school and always including notes as to where do you use the content you're learning, along with requiring subsidiaries to go independent or drop their branding. Clearly this isn't very realistic so feel free to expouse absurd policy.

      12 votes
    2. What did you do this week?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      11 votes
    3. What do you do when asked to automate away other peoples' jobs?

      At work there's a project that was originally pitched as an automated system we would build for a new client, and now the conversation has shifted towards automating away some data entry tasks for...

      At work there's a project that was originally pitched as an automated system we would build for a new client, and now the conversation has shifted towards automating away some data entry tasks for an existing client. If the project is successful I would guess that some or all of the people doing the data entry tasks would be out of a job. And if it's a resounding success I would guess that the powers that be would be eager to apply it in other areas and potentially put more people out of jobs.

      This project is in the very early stages of gathering requirements and whatnot so it's not really clear what exactly we're building or what my role in building it would be. But it involves a technology that's new to us (natural language processing) and often times I end up playing some role in a project that involves learning something new, even if it's just in some small way.

      So yeah, I know automation replacing low-skill work is nothing new and if these jobs can be automated away, they will be sooner or later, but this is the first time I've been confronted with the idea of using my skills to put people I don't know out of a job and it sticks in my craw. Normally I love automation and interacting with new (to me) tech even if it's nothing groundbreaking and I'm just doing the plumbing to connect system A to interface B, but in the past it's always been in the name of freeing up people from tedious tasks so that they can do more interesting and more important work, rather than "freeing" them of their paycheck. So I'm finding myself adding this to the small but compelling pile of frustrations I have with this job and weighing it against the also-small but also-compelling pile of things I love about it.

      Anyway, if you've ever been in a position where you were asked to automate away someone else's job, how did that go? What did you do?

      If you haven't, what do you think you would do?

      16 votes
    4. Las Vegas Democratic Debate Discussion Thread

      So it has been awhile since we had Democratic Debate threads here and I thought it would be nice to have a discussion topic for tonight's debate. I am really interested to see what everyone's...

      So it has been awhile since we had Democratic Debate threads here and I thought it would be nice to have a discussion topic for tonight's debate.

      I am really interested to see what everyone's thoughts are going into the debate tonight as far as expectations, what you are hoping to hear, and what outcome you think will come from this.

      Please share your thoughts below!


      What time is the debate?

      The debate will air live at 9 p.m. ET from the Paris Theater in Las Vegas.

      How can I watch it?

      The second February Democratic debate will be live-streamed on NBCNews.com, MSNBC.com, the Nevada Independent’s website, and on the NBC News app. The Noticias Telemundo Facebook page will also stream the night’s events, as will the NBC News and MSNBC Facebook pages. You will also be able to stream the debate live on NBC’s own streaming app, NBC News Now, on devices like Apple TV, Roku, and Amazon Fire TV.

      What is new?

      Wednesday's debate will feature the first appearance from former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg, who met the DNC's mandating polling threshold this week.

      Who is moderating?

      NBC's Lester Holt, Chuck Todd, Hallie Jackson, Noticias Telemundo's Vanessa Hauc and The Nevada Independent's Jon Ralston will moderate the event.

      29 votes
    5. What are you grateful for?

      Name some things in your life that you're grateful for, we need more happiness in the world! I'll go first. My incredibly lovely girlfriend. Chocolate cake. Central heating! Neck pillows.

      15 votes
    6. What did you do this weekend?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      15 votes
    7. Has anybody changed their first and/or last name (legally or socially)?

      I don’t like my name, and I never really have. It has nothing to do with ‘tomf’. My main questions are: How did you go about choosing the new name? How did you manage/roll out the new name? What...

      I don’t like my name, and I never really have. It has nothing to do with ‘tomf’.

      My main questions are:

      1. How did you go about choosing the new name?
      2. How did you manage/roll out the new name?
      3. What unforeseen challenges came up?

      My main concern is that I’ll settle on a ‘cool’ sounding name and that people will think it’s weird. While I want something normal, I do have some parameters:

      1. The name should be free for the .com and major social media
      2. I don’t want a main ‘S’ sound, since I don’t like how I say it.
      3. I am hoping to have something simple to use over the phone. I use ‘Tom’ for Starbucks and reservations because it’s clear, short, and not me.

      Anyway, has anybody done this? Any feedback is great, but I am more focused on changing my first name.

      Pardon the crappy tags.

      17 votes
    8. How would you reduce speeding by car drivers?

      I was reading this twitter post and it made me wonder if you have any ideas to stop speeding by car drivers? Have any of these ideas been tried anywhere? I'm also interested in unintended...

      I was reading this twitter post and it made me wonder if you have any ideas to stop speeding by car drivers? Have any of these ideas been tried anywhere? I'm also interested in unintended consequences.

      https://twitter.com/agnessjonsson/status/1229103764843438086?s=20

      Agnes @agnessjonsson

      fact of the day: Sweden once experimented with a “speed camera lottery”. Those who drove within the speed limit were automatically entered into a drawing where the prize fund came from fines that speeders paid.

      They tested it in a few different cities and I haven’t read the results of each one, but in Stockholm the average speed on the selected road decreased by 22 percent.

      17 votes
    9. What did you do this week?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      15 votes
    10. What's something you have always wanted to know about being LGBT (but were maybe afraid to ask)?

      Introduction Gender and sexuality are complex, personal topics, and asking questions about them can often feel invasive or even offensive. Discussions about them can be tough to navigate,...

      Introduction

      Gender and sexuality are complex, personal topics, and asking questions about them can often feel invasive or even offensive. Discussions about them can be tough to navigate, especially online, where people's guards are often up and hostility and harassment are common.

      In order to help clear the air and provide a safe space for honest and genuine dialogue, we have assembled a cross-section of Tildes' LGBT community to whom you can ask questions. These volunteers have agreed to open up about their experiences, identities, and knowledge.

      In this thread, you will be able to ask our panelists questions regarding anything you've ever wanted to know about being LGBT. Our goal is to provide you with meaningful answers, not judge you for your questions! For the purposes of this thread, LGBT refers to the umbrella term under which all minority gender and sexual identities fall.


      Guidelines for Participation

      Asking Questions
      • Questions will be afforded the principle of charity. Ask any questions you've ever wanted to know, especially those you might feel are "not okay" to ask elsewhere.
      • Feel free to ask informational questions (e.g. "What does 'pansexual' mean?"), experiential questions (e.g. "Are you out to your family? If so, how did they respond to you coming out?"), and opinion questions (e.g. "What are your thoughts on the various LGBT acronyms?").
      • You can ask questions to the whole panel or to specific members. If asking specific members, please ping them using an @username mention in your comment.
      • Follow-up questions are allowed and encouraged.
      • Not all questions have to be serious! It's totally okay to ask fun, non-serious stuff too.
      Giving Answers
      • Panelists have the right to pass on any question they do not want to answer. While they might give a reason for passing, they are not required to do so.
      • Similarly, not all questions will receive answers from all panelists. We have a large group and don't want to overwhelm everyone with 10+ responses to every question.
      • Each panelist is speaking from their own experience and perspective, so you might find conflicting information in responses to a question, and that's okay! We're a diverse group of different people, not a unified monoculture!
      Additional Notes
      • The panel's make-up is based entirely on who volunteered and is not meant to be representative of all identities under the LGBT umbrella.
      • Similarly, any one panelist's voice should not be taken as representative of the opinion of all those who share their identity.
      • Please remember that these panelists are choosing to share intimate and often difficult personal information. Please respect their disclosure in your responses -- they are putting themselves out there for you!
      • If you do not wish to see or participate in this thread for whatever reason, use Tildes' ignore topic feature to hide it from your feed.

      Panelists

      Here are the users who will be answering your questions:

      @Algernon_Asimov
      @CALICO
      @Cleb
      @emdash
      @Gaywallet
      @kfwyre
      @patience_limited
      @reifyresonance
      @ShilohMizook
      @Silbern
      @tindall
      @Whom

      You can get more information on each in their bios below:

      Full Panelist Bios
      Name Identity Preferred Pronouns Bio
      @Algernon_Asimov Gay man I'm "Algernon". I'm a middle-aged gay man living in Australia. I came of age during the 1980s, when "gay" meant "Got AIDS Yet?".
      @CALICO Pan & Poly, Male-shaped, Agender, Non-transitioning Trans None/No-preference Late-20's, military brat, former military, current gov't contractor. Historically lived all over the US; in the past 18-months I've lived in three states and two non-US countries—currently Afghanistan. Out where it matters, closeted where it doesn't. Unmarried—probably forever—in a LT/LDR currently with just one person. Shameless hippie, hobbyist, & aspiring author.
      @Cleb Genderfluid (Agender & Femme, also fine with just Non-Binary) They/Them, She/Her Early 20s, American, white, closeted in real life. Grew up in very conservative & religious area, still live here. Can talk about growing up like that, my struggle with fluidity/internalized transphobia/gender as a whole, things relating to trans culture on the internet, and any of the other standard fare trans and gender-nonconforming person questions.
      @emdash. If you wanted to find my real name and social media profiles, you probably could, but keep it to yourself and don't be a dick, okay? Gay cis-male He/him Early 20s (wow there's a theme emerging) guy living in New Zealand. Software engineering degree, but I hate the industry, so working on my own business and studying to be a pilot instead (aka the backup plan). I also fly a paraglider for fun. I've always lived in New Zealand, but would love to live overseas. Have the Tinder/Taimi profile tuned to a fine fucking art (IMHO). Out to friends, family aren't informed since I'm not particularly close to them anyway.
      @Gaywallet pan, poly, enby (nonbinary) they/them Early 30s, lived in California my whole life. Currently have 5 partners and feeling quite polysaturated. Big into raving, psychedelics, and general hippy stuff but with a queer focus. Out to friends and family, but not fully flying my flag at work (work in progress to happen this year).
      @kfwyre gay cis male he/him/they/them Teacher. Happily married. Living in the US, and grew up in a very conservative Christian area. Came out in my 20s and dealt with severe depression and fallout with family.
      @patience_limited Queer; intersex non-binary they/them/she/her Mainly in the sidebar. US, 50's, raised near a university town, married. White(ish).
      @reifyresonance transfemme, queer, poly she/they 19, living in the southern US. Studied in China for a year and did a field research project on marginalized queer identities in Shanghai nightlife (talked to people in gay bars), so if anyone wants to hear my (white, American) thoughts on that, I'm game :). I also got to help start an LGBT organization at my school there! Spent the last six months or so doing computer programming, and was part of the workplace LGBT affinity group. (Also, general transgender questions.)
      @ShilohMizook (Shiloh) Bisexual, lean mostly towards guys. Cis male. He, Him. 17, I go to a Catholic school in Florida, but the people there are pretty accepting, so I'm out to everyone. My parents try to avoid the subject. I've never actually met another non-straight guy in real life, which has kind of frustrated me, but it's okay.
      @Silbern Gay male He/him I'm an early 20's white guy with Asperger's Syndrome studying Computer Science. I come from a military family, so I've traveled a lot and lived in many places that were across the spectrum in gay friendliness. I currently live in Hawaii, which might be relevant both for my answers as well as possible time zone limitations.
      @tindall bisexual transgender female she/her Software engineer just getting out of college and into my first long-term full-time gig, at a company making cancer screening software. Grew up all over the place (East Coast, then Texas, then California) and I'm now in the Midwest. I care a lot about making the world a gentler and more supportive place for everyone, and I try to apply my skills to do that.
      @Whom (...and Scarlett) Trans lesbian She Early 20s, raised in the rural US (Wisconsin) studying English Education. Oh, and white. That's the important bits for context. I'm very familiar with current youth trans culture on the internet (which is so pervasive within the community that it's necessary for understanding what it's like being young and trans), so I'm well-equipped to answer questions relating to that or, of course, the trans experience as I see it. I might also be a decent resource to ask about how mental illness (particularly depression, severe anxiety, and light dissociation) fits into the whole picture.

      The door is open. Ask away!

      80 votes
    11. How do you buy a car?

      How do you decide which kind of car you want? How do you prioritize what you're looking for? How do you know if you'll like it or not? Bonus points for tips on selecting a car your spouse will...
      • How do you decide which kind of car you want?

        • How do you prioritize what you're looking for?
        • How do you know if you'll like it or not?
        • Bonus points for tips on selecting a car your spouse will like as well.
      • Why do you pick new/used?

      • How do you negotiate the price of the car?

      14 votes
    12. What did you do this weekend?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      13 votes
    13. How could we regulate biased/lying media outlets and aggregators without encroaching on good ones?

      I find this to be a pretty important question when news organizations like Fox News are literally aiming to help the Republican Party to stay on power, CNN and MSNBC promote centrist candidates...

      I find this to be a pretty important question when news organizations like Fox News are literally aiming to help the Republican Party to stay on power, CNN and MSNBC promote centrist candidates and media aggregators ranging from r/the_donald to r/chapotraphouse banning anyone who opposes them. Thing is, these are the most well known examples. How could we tell faulty media sources and aggregators apart from good ones in mass? Do you think that's possible?

      15 votes
    14. What did you do this week?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      12 votes
    15. What's the deal with meta advertising?

      I don't watch T.V very often, but do - when I'm up (which is infrequent given I'm outside the U.S) - watch the NBA. Recently I've had a little time so have watched a few games live. Doing so, I...

      I don't watch T.V very often, but do - when I'm up (which is infrequent given I'm outside the U.S) - watch the NBA. Recently I've had a little time so have watched a few games live. Doing so, I was quite taken aback at how commonplace humour and meta advertising are nowadays. Is this just a U.S thing?

      Is there any research out there on when and why advertisers started doing this? Seems like every other ad shoots for either humour or "we know you know this is an ad, you're clearly smart enough to realise that, so smart in fact you might want to buy into our brand". Whatever the case, as ever, grateful for resources/discussion from those more in the know than I.

      EDIT: A good example that is equal parts humour/meta is LeBron James' Super Bowl Sprite Ad.

      10 votes
    16. Let's come up with some isograms for fun!

      Before we get started, the word isogram has multiple definitions according to Wikipedia so to clarify, the definition I'm intending is: A word without any repeating letters So, no letter can...

      Before we get started, the word isogram has multiple definitions according to Wikipedia so to clarify, the definition I'm intending is:

      A word without any repeating letters

      So, no letter can appear more than once in the word. As the length increases, the possibilities decrease (and the better it gets!). Here's some examples:

      • The word isogram itself. This makes the word autological, the expressed property applies to itself. Neat!
      • Tildes We've been on an isogram website all along! :O
      • Spectria And they're also the organization running the website! :OO
      • Deimos, even the owner's name is an isogram! My god!!!

      Here's some examples that aren't isograms:

      • Unique There's 2 us! Ew!
      • Banana 3 as and 2 ns?! Disgusting!
      • Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious Good heavens! 3 ss, 2 us, 2 ps, 2 es, 2 rs, 3 cs, 3 as, 3 ls, 7 is and 2 os!!! What! Yes... I counted. Just kidding I made a program do it. :P

      Now it's up to you. What can you come up with?

      11 votes
    17. What's good about nationalism?

      This is a question I've been thinking about a great deal in the context of changing global power dynamics. Rising authoritarianism, militarism, fundamentalism, and other ailments of our times are...

      This is a question I've been thinking about a great deal in the context of changing global power dynamics. Rising authoritarianism, militarism, fundamentalism, and other ailments of our times are getting in the way of dealing with universal threats to humanity, like climate change, pandemics, and even asteroid impacts.

      But nationalism has such a grip on people's psyches... Parts are nostalgic, and parts are about tribal sense of belonging and purpose. Tonight, I watched a Chef's Table episode about a young Russian chef on a mission to make Russian cuisine great again (not his words). The interesting thing is that Mukhin essentially acknowledges that he's helping Russian cuisine become great not by denigrating other nation's products, or clinging to an idealized version of his home food, but through intentionally discovering what is worthwhile elsewhere and at home. It got me thinking about what's been lost in a globalized world, what could be found in isolated places, and what it would take to let people bridge local interests and universal values.

      I'd also watched Raise Hell: The Life and Times of Molly Ivins over the weekend. Ivins' writing on Texas state politics as a microcosm and foreshadowing of current U.S. concerns is essential. Then I read Citylab's old story on the paralysis of New York subway system development.

      It occurred to me that the U.S. has become fractally parochial, with increasingly local or corporate interests thwarting any exercise favoring broader national or regional goods. The original framing of the nation in the U.S. Constitution has significant flaws because of the original tension between sovereign state interests, and the federal system. We're not learning from the rest of the world very well, either.

      I'm curious about whether Tilders think there's such a thing as positive nationalism, capable of both unifying localities and maintaining or growing what's good about a culture in the face of potentially hostile competing nations.

      • Do you think there are positive aspects to nationalism, and if so, what?

      • Do you think nationalism has been, on balance, a positive or negative force in your country in the past?

      • Do you think nationalism is, on balance, a positive or negative force in your country right now?

      • Do you think your country could have a positive version of nationalism in the future?

      • Is it necessary to exclude or mitigate influences from elsewhere in order to maintain the original nature of your national culture?

      If I may ask, please include your nationality when responding.

      11 votes
    18. Who here has some sort of 'developmental disorder'?

      It's been a while since we had one of these. probably for good reason since clogging the site with 'do we exist' threads like this is counterproductive 'Developmental disorders' comprises autism,...

      It's been a while since we had one of these. probably for good reason since clogging the site with 'do we exist' threads like this is counterproductive

      'Developmental disorders' comprises autism, ADHD, Tourette's and more. (Here's a wiki article for them.)

      I'll start with my asperger syndrome which was very strong autism when I was a child.

      17 votes
    19. What is something cheap to create but expensive to purchase?

      I was having a conversation with a friend today about the economics of art and the potential cost of purchasing an idea. It got me thinking, what are some other things relatively cheap to create...

      I was having a conversation with a friend today about the economics of art and the potential cost of purchasing an idea. It got me thinking, what are some other things relatively cheap to create but expensive to purchase?

      19 votes
    20. What did you do this weekend?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their weekend. Did you make any plans? Take a trip? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      12 votes
    21. What did you do this week?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      19 votes
    22. What's a widely criticized thing that you feel is worth defending?

      Anything is fair game: from a movie seemingly everyone panned to a company seemingly everyone hates. Give us a justification for why you think, say, nails on a chalkboard is actually a delightful...

      Anything is fair game: from a movie seemingly everyone panned to a company seemingly everyone hates. Give us a justification for why you think, say, nails on a chalkboard is actually a delightful sound or why Ringo is the best Beatle.

      With that said, I'm interested in genuine answers, not just people playing devil's advocate, so please only submit something you actually believe! Also, while my examples are light-hearted, serious answers are welcome too.

      Guiding questions:

      • What are the common criticisms for your chosen thing?
      • Why do you feel that it's worth defending, even in light of those criticisms?
      40 votes
    23. Meta - Changes to the recurring topics in ~talk

      On Monday, I asked Deimos if we could make some changes to the recurring topics here in ~talk. For those who are not aware, we have two topics in this group that get posted automatically: On...

      On Monday, I asked Deimos if we could make some changes to the recurring topics here in ~talk.

      For those who are not aware, we have two topics in this group that get posted automatically:

      These topics are very casual, and they are mostly meant to be an easy way for users to participate on the site.

      So, what are the changes being made?

      • On Mondays, instead of asking users about plans for their week, we will now be asking them what they did over the past weekend. So "What are you doing this week?" becomes "What did you do this weekend?".

      • On Fridays, predictably, instead of asking users about plans for their weekend, we will now be asking them about what they did over the past week. So "What are you doing this weekend?" becomes "What did you do this week?".

      In case you are wondering, yes, inspiration for this change was brought about by activity on Lobsters. Lobsters has its own "What are you doing this weekend?" and "What are you working on this week?" posts. Those posts were the direct inspiration for these recurring topics here on Tildes. In the latest post on Lobsters, a user there asked an interesting question:

      Wouldn’t it make more sense to ask for a retrospective, that is “What you did this weekend?”

      After giving the idea some thought, I agree with that user that asking for a retrospective makes more sense. In summary, I agree for these reasons:

      • I believe that responding to a prompt with a retrospective is healthier than writing out plans or expectations
      • I believe it will be easier for users to write about what they have done, rather than what they plan on doing
      • I believe that by being easier (and healthier) to contribute to, more users will take part in the discussion

      I do not have evidence to support any of my reasons, but I really do believe that having users write out retrospectives of their activities, rather than their plans or intents, is a healthier way to conduct these discussions.

      Personally, I have not been very active in the past few recurring topics in ~talk because I have not felt motivated to share my plans or intents. I think a big reason for my lack of motivation is that writing about what I have done feels much better emotionally than writing about what I want to do, because that causes me to set up expectations.

      So, after discussing ideas for these changes with Deimos, he agreed to alter the recurring topics in ~talk. The new topic "What did you do this week?" will be posted tomorrow. Hope to see you there!


      And of course, if anyone has any questions, comments, or concerns about this change, feel free to give your input. These changes could very well be a "bad move", considering the idea is more or less based on my feelings, so I would love to hear any feedback that anyone has.

      Also, if anyone has any ideas for additional changes that could be made to these recurring topics, I would also be very eager to hear those ideas (as well would Deimos, I am sure).

      25 votes
    24. What do you think about sex dolls?

      I personally see it like a stereotypical microtransaction to skip a mission in a mobile game. It costs a lot (at least for now for sex dolls), skips a mission for you and likely has some ethical...

      I personally see it like a stereotypical microtransaction to skip a mission in a mobile game. It costs a lot (at least for now for sex dolls), skips a mission for you and likely has some ethical issues, but if it skips the mission then someone's gonna buy it and might as well be you. (Well, at least that's what I'd presume. Also, life isn't very comparable to a mobile game.)

      6 votes
    25. Is sex work bad?

      Prompted by a recent tildes post about vice, and also this from the bbc, and a conversation with a colleague who just went to a strip club, I keep thinking about this issue. I have a stake in...

      Prompted by a recent tildes post about vice, and also this from the bbc, and a conversation with a colleague who just went to a strip club, I keep thinking about this issue.

      I have a stake in this, despite being cis male: I have mother, sisters, wife, and most importantly young daughter. And I am a feminist, on simple moral grounds.

      My baseline position is that whether a woman chooses to engage in sex work is, and should be legally and socially supported as, entirely her own choice.

      The only question I have any business answering, or participating in finding an answer, is whether my patronage of sex work is inherently exploitive, to either the woman whom I am patronizing* or to other women individually or to womanhood and general issues of gender.

      And I just can’t come up with a good answer. I do look at porn, but increasingly, as with meat, the potential ethical problems of it are reducing the enjoyment. I have tried to ease my conscience by limiting myself to cartoons and stories, but those wouldn’t stop the harm that is caused by the mere existence of porn, if any exists.

      As a purely practical matter, the existence of the industry leads to opportunities for exploitation of individuals, and the advancement of a culture of gender exploitation. But as the war on drugs has so ably demonstrated, any attempt at prohibition only increases the level of exploitation, while smart regulation decreases it. Regardless, though, there’s plenty of exploitation to go around the world, I heard there’s thing called #metoo.

      I come from a sex-suppressing, fundamentalist “Christian” background. The quotes are there to indicate that I think much of the practices were anything but christ-like. The principles there swirl through the culture around me in varying degrees of intensity, and they inform and direct my choices (sometimes against my will and my better hopes and ideals). I have to be open to the notion that any objection I have to sex work, or my participation, is entirely a cultural construct. And while I don’t think it is true, I cannot dismiss the notion that morals themselves may have no possible objective existence, having relevance and utility (if at all) only in very time and space limited scopes.

      It is what I believe the sociologists call a “wicked” problem. It involves really complicated normative stances, and there’s no data analysis that can provide any guidance. For myself, I expect my participation to continue to wane as I mature. I only hope that whatever I do only further enables and empowers the women in my life and everywhere.

      • I almost stopped myself from using this word when I realized potential implications, but ultimately left it in because it (and the fact it was my natural inclination to select it) really highlights the issue for me and hopefully others

      Bonus hypothetical: If porn is somehow wrong and harmful, even drawings and writings, are sex fantasies also wrong?

      30 votes
    26. Who else gets concerned about random things at inappropriate times?

      This question really came to mind to me about last week when I was hanging out with some friends. I always noticed it as a part of my personality but I never really thought about it as in depth as...

      This question really came to mind to me about last week when I was hanging out with some friends. I always noticed it as a part of my personality but I never really thought about it as in depth as I have recently. That night I immediately got concerned to the point of it ruining my evening about the following things:

      • We're running out of helium in the world
      • Where is my birth certificate
      • The old VHS tapes of my childhood and important moments in my family are slowly degrading but I can't digitise them until I go home to my parents and that's not for at least half a year, will they hold up that long?
      • There's too much space junk
      • I used so much plastic just cooking dinner this one evening for my friends, imagine how much gets bought and consumed worldwide
      • Some languages are going to die out and there's nothing I can do about it
      • Are the rhinos doing ok?
      • What's my blood type and am I allergic to anything?

      Does anyone else suffer from this idiosyncracy? If so, what are some things that concern you or what are some other things that I can be concerned about?

      EDIT: This turned dark, I thought I was just sharing some lighthearted fun and now I have schizophrenia, OCD and should talk to a therapist... jeez louise

      19 votes
    27. Where do you draw the line when it comes to what data collection one can do on you?

      (Presuming it's done purely for statistical purposes of course.) I, like most of us am personally fine with age, sex, city level location and relationship status. I really dislike using real names...

      (Presuming it's done purely for statistical purposes of course.)

      I, like most of us am personally fine with age, sex, city level location and relationship status. I really dislike using real names though since I feel like it ties you to who you are in person, which I really dislike and I support people deciding not to fill them in because in some places even what I've outlined can get you in trouble.

      10 votes
    28. Introductions #7 - It's been a while... Let's have an "Introduce Yourself" post! How's everyone doing?

      Whether you've just joined or have been here for a while, welcome! Feel free to say hi and make some new internet pals. :) If you need some inspiration for a reply, here are some starter questions...

      Whether you've just joined or have been here for a while, welcome! Feel free to say hi and make some new internet pals. :)


      If you need some inspiration for a reply, here are some starter questions to get you going:

      • Who or what brought you to Tildes?
      • What's the inspiration behind your username?
      • If you could add a group to Tildes to reflect your interests, which one would you choose and why?

      Past Introductions topics can be found here: -1-, -2-, -3-, -4-, -5-, -6-

      For an introduction to Tildes itself, this post has you covered!

      41 votes
    29. You have unlimited funds. How do you help your city?

      Rules Please identify your city, and post a link to Wikipedia if the name is ambiguous or not well know. If you do not wish to provide this information for privacy reasons, you can provide some...

      Rules

      1. Please identify your city, and post a link to Wikipedia if the name is ambiguous or not well know. If you do not wish to provide this information for privacy reasons, you can provide some general informations about your city or nominate a similar one.

      2. Your funds are unlimited, but you're limited to a maximum of 3 projects. The projects can be as big or small as you want. And try to give a reasonable amount of detail. This is not intended for comedy or fictionalized speculation. Please submit ideas that you think are actually viable!

      3. You must increase any metrics included on or related to the Human Development Index[1] of your city.

      4. The projects don't need to focus on your birthplace or where you currently live. Any city you have significant knowledge of will do. But it must be a single one.

      5. Both consequentalist and deontological ethics must be observed. The projects must not contradict the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. In other words, be excellent to each other!

      6. Unlike my previous ~talk thread, in this one I won't play a jackass genie or anything like that. The purpose of this thread is to have a healthy discussion on urban development by sharing our aspirations for the cities we love.

      Example of areas to improve

      • culture
      • education
      • internet access
      • employment
      • transportation
      • water
      • environment

      [1] This is only a starting point. There is space for subjectivity

      20 votes
    30. What are you doing this week?

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their week. If you have any plans, goals, accomplishments, or even failures, whether they be personal or work...

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their week.

      If you have any plans, goals, accomplishments, or even failures, whether they be personal or work related, I'd love to hear about them. This is a place for casual discussion about your week, past, present, and future.

      A list of all previous topics in this series can be found here.

      So, what (or how) are you doing this week?

      4 votes
    31. Tildes users on the fediverse

      It's been a while since we've had a thread like this and our active users have cycled around a bit (plus there's a lot of dead links in the old threads), so who here is on the fediverse?...

      It's been a while since we've had a thread like this and our active users have cycled around a bit (plus there's a lot of dead links in the old threads), so who here is on the fediverse?

      Connecting with some more people from here sounds nice :)

      13 votes
    32. Is death always tragic?

      I'll preface this by saying this post is birthed out of a small argument I'm having on Reddit, but the topic seems like a worthwhile one. (And I'm not getting much other than downvotes for a...

      I'll preface this by saying this post is birthed out of a small argument I'm having on Reddit, but the topic seems like a worthwhile one. (And I'm not getting much other than downvotes for a counterargument over there!)

      The initial question is whether or not the death of someone who is very old (95 years or more) should be considered tragic. Some things to consider:

      1. The overall health and condition of the person.
      • Are they in constant state of suffering?
      1. The wishes of the person.
      • Do they actively wish to be dead? This might not even be out of suffering. Some people, as they get to be quite old, are just bored of their lives or want this stage to be over. Anecdotally, my great-grandmother was this way from the ages of 90 and onward. (She quite famously would greet cashiers with "I want to die.")
      1. Are they still active?
      • Do they still find meaning in what they are doing? For example, David Attenborough is 93 years old and is still a big presence on the world stage. Despite his great age, if he were to die, his work would still be ‘cut short.’
      1. The circumstances by which they die.
      • Was it sudden, or did it take a long time? Was it painful? Was it violent?

      This list is not exhaustive. I welcome suggestions for what should be added to it.

      There is also how we define tragedy. In general terms, it typically just alludes to an event that causes great suffering and distress. I think this is the definition that we are more concerned with. Alternatively, there is the theatrical definition of tragedy, which is more tied to the leading character suffering some major downfall at the end of the narrative. While we could construe the death of someone in real life this way, it seems to be a bit of a stretch as most of us do not live out our lives in three-act structures with a clear climax and finale. (I’m going to rule out this definition now, if not just for the sake of argument.)

      Balancing all of these thoughts, I think the crux of where disagreement lies is in how we feel about death for the deceased versus our own selfish desires. Bringing this back to my anecdote, about twenty years ago, my great-grandmother passed at the age of 94. She spent at least the last 5 years of her life pleading to God to finally take her. Her health was fine. She lived in her house, alone, fully capable of maintaining it (and herself). In fact, in the year prior to her death, she was so physically active that she painted all 200 feet of her white picket fence! By all means, she was not physically suffering. She just simply wanted to go.

      Then she did. I think the group consensus was something akin to, “Well, I guess she finally got what she wanted. I’m going to miss her.” It was a feeling of simultaneously being happy for her and grief for ourselves.

      To which, does this make for a tragedy?

      Some might call it splitting hairs, but what I am arguing is that the death itself was not tragic. What is tragic is our loss of the ability to interact with that person and the feelings of grief that follow. I cannot help but feel these are ultimately separate things that we have such a difficult time reconciling. Part of life is death, and as long as we revere life, we must also revere the last part of it. If we did this better, we might have an easier time accepting things like medical-assistance-in-dying. It is for this reason that I say, death, by default, does not necessitate tragedy.

      However while death is not necessarily tragic, I do think there are a multitude of conditions that would make death sufficiently tragic. Looking back at my list above, the death of a young healthy person would be considered tragic. Suppose someone was violently beheaded; this could be considered tragic. Even suppose that the 93-year-old David Attenborough passed away, I would think his death to be tragic as he wanted to offer more to the world.

      Anyway, I think I’ve rambled enough. What are your thoughts?

      11 votes
    33. No-money fun ideas?

      Spouse and I were on a weekend drive-and-walkaround today, and discussing ways to save money on house renovations. We've kept running into things like, "yeah, two arthritic 50-somethings are...

      Spouse and I were on a weekend drive-and-walkaround today, and discussing ways to save money on house renovations. We've kept running into things like, "yeah, two arthritic 50-somethings are really going to DIY sheetrocking a ceiling...nope."

      I'm guessing nearly all Tilders have gone through times when they didn't have much, if any, disposable income, or had to squeeze budgets to save for big expenses.

      So what do you enjoy doing for entertainment that costs little or nothing beyond what you'd ordinarily spend for basic living expenses?

      I know we used to do things like gathering people for potluck, cheap jug wine, and chatter, but we're still building a circle of friends and acquaintances, and don't have space for entertaining yet! Walks in the woods, reading, volunteering, and watching movies, are pretty much givens, but happy to hear your thoughts.

      25 votes
    34. What are you doing this weekend?

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their weekend. If you have any plans, things you want to get done, things you have done, things you haven't...

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their weekend.

      If you have any plans, things you want to get done, things you have done, things you haven't done, or even if you just want to talk about how you're doing this weekend, this is a place for casual discussion about those things.

      A list of all previous topics in this series can be found here.

      So, what (or how) are you doing this weekend?

      12 votes
    35. What's something you're comfortable telling people on the internet that you wouldn't share with people you know in real life?

      This is presumably unanswerable for anyone whose handle here is known by anyone in their real life, but I figured I'd ask it anyway, as there are likely a good number of us for whom our Tildes...

      This is presumably unanswerable for anyone whose handle here is known by anyone in their real life, but I figured I'd ask it anyway, as there are likely a good number of us for whom our Tildes names are fully separate from our real life identitires.

      • What are you willing to share with internet strangers but not people you know in real life?
      • Why is it important to you that it is not shared with people you know in real life?

      As noted in the question, I'm looking for stuff you're comfortable sharing. I'm not trying to fish for deep dirt here.

      29 votes
    36. If you could make any event(s) in history not happen, which one(s) would you pick?

      I didn't know tildes has trending topics. I'd either pick the rise of the bolsheviks in Russia (You can replace them with the mensheviks, who wanted to abide by democracy.), The division of the...

      I didn't know tildes has trending topics.

      I'd either pick the rise of the bolsheviks in Russia (You can replace them with the mensheviks, who wanted to abide by democracy.), The division of the HRE (A united germany in 900CE would be very consequential.) And the rise of the hapsburgs in what would be Austria-Hungary, since it meshed a dozen linguistic groups together.

      13 votes
    37. What are your favorite and least favorite work activities?

      Whether it be at a job or at school, what is your favorite work item to do? And what about the least favorite? Not required to say profession, but it does help give some context. Translation What...

      Whether it be at a job or at school, what is your favorite work item to do? And what about the least favorite?

      Not required to say profession, but it does help give some context.


      Translation

      What are your favourite and least favourite work activities?

      Whether it be at a job or at school, what is your favourite work item to do? And what about the least favourite?

      Not required to say profession, but it does help give some context.

      23 votes
    38. How would you kill Hitler?

      The mission You have been tasked with the mission to kill Hitler. The mission is mandatory and you cannot decline it. You have access to a state of the art time machine: a simple Casio wristwatch...

      The mission

      You have been tasked with the mission to kill Hitler. The mission is mandatory and you cannot decline it. You have access to a state of the art time machine: a simple Casio wristwatch in which you enter the time, date and location where you wanna travel to. It can travel to any point in past Earth's history, and it is programmed to automatically and safely return you to the present time as soon as the mission is completed.

      You have access to all weapons available to humankind in the present day, but you can only take what you can carry.

      You also have access to technology that will make you look ethnically German complete with Nazi uniforms, and a perfectly functioning universal translator.

      How this thread will work

      I will try to come up with a negative outcome for every answer in jackass genie style. Others are welcome to do the same!

      22 votes
    39. What are you doing this week?

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their week. If you have any plans, goals, accomplishments, or even failures, whether they be personal or work...

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their week.

      If you have any plans, goals, accomplishments, or even failures, whether they be personal or work related, I'd love to hear about them. This is a place for casual discussion about your week, past, present, and future.

      A list of all previous topics in this series can be found here.

      So, what (or how) are you doing this week?

      9 votes
    40. Let's talk about humorous podcasts

      Hey there people! Seeing how last post I could find on the topic was posted almost one year ago and how my question is a bit more specific, I thought a new one could be worthwhile. Admittedly, I...

      Hey there people!

      Seeing how last post I could find on the topic was posted almost one year ago and how my question is a bit more specific, I thought a new one could be worthwhile.

      Admittedly, I am not an assiduous podcast listener - what I'm mostly looking for is a show to 'scratch the itch' every once in a while which features good chemistry between its hosts, exploring whatever topic with humorous tones; bonus points if said topic is interesting.

      To exemplify, some of the best podcasts I can think of on the spot are How did This Get Made (I can particularly recommend the episode dedicated to Mr. Nanny), or How to Fuck Up an Airport.

      The first one is a serie that analyze extremely poor or obscure movies, while the second one unveils the debacle surrounding the 20 year old (and still aging) Berlin Brandenburg Airport project; I know this last one might sounds boring, but it's a baffling and hilarious journey - surely and by far my favorite Podcast.

      TL;DR
      So yeah, what are your most entertaining, hilarious, and generally fun podcasts?

      25 votes
    41. On Vice

      As far as "vice" is concerned, do any of you draw the line somewhere? For example, has anyone here been to a strip club? Paid for sex? Engaged in recreational use of illegal drugs? Gambled? I was...

      As far as "vice" is concerned, do any of you draw the line somewhere? For example, has anyone here been to a strip club? Paid for sex? Engaged in recreational use of illegal drugs? Gambled?

      I was inspired by this post and was wondering where ya'll stand.

      26 votes
    42. What are you doing this weekend?

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their weekend. If you have any plans, things you want to get done, things you have done, things you haven't...

      This topic is part of a weekly series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss their weekend.

      If you have any plans, things you want to get done, things you have done, things you haven't done, or even if you just want to talk about how you're doing this weekend, this is a place for casual discussion about those things.

      A list of all previous topics in this series can be found here.

      So, what (or how) are you doing this weekend?

      9 votes
    43. What's your daily routine like?

      I'll start (for reference, I am a 14 year old Brazilian in a presumably poor house , also in retrospect this reminds me of what they tell you to do at the beginning of most English courses, which...

      I'll start (for reference, I am a 14 year old Brazilian in a presumably poor house , also in retrospect this reminds me of what they tell you to do at the beginning of most English courses, which makes me feel like a cringy kid):

      • Wake up (6:15, praised be alarm clocks)

      • Put on the school uniform (takes 5-10 minutes)

      • Have breakfast (takes 10 minutes)

      • Brush my teeth (takes less than 5 minutes)

      • Walk to school (6:45)

      • Reach school (less than 100 meters from my home thankfully) and enter a classroom (7:00 plus a few minutes for teachers to set stuff up)

      • stay in school until 12:17 (every time the subject changes, we pack our stuff and go to the classroom the teacher of the subject is in. There is also a break between 9:30 and 10:20.)

      • Leave school and go home

      • Get home by 12:45

      • Have lunch, usually rice and beans with either meat or chicken meat in some flattened form I can't describe, usually at 1-1:30 PM.

      Do... whatever on the phone (as of recently be here or in discord, along with reddit and YouTube for longer unless it runs out of battery)

      • Have dinner (usually at 8:30-9:00, same food as lunch)

      • Pack the books for the subjects they teach tomorrow

      • Go to sleep at 10.

      During vacation/weekends I can wake up from 5-10 AM depending on how well I slept the previous night. The rest is the same, except for Saturdays my parents go and buy some esfihas to break the monotony of lunch and dinner.

      29 votes
    44. How do you people at universities handle your notes?

      Specially those of you who attend courses on the field of humanities, in which I feel the amount of note-taking is even greater than most fields, given all the reading and talking that occurs...

      Specially those of you who attend courses on the field of humanities, in which I feel the amount of note-taking is even greater than most fields, given all the reading and talking that occurs during classes and out of them. How do you do it? Do you write on paper perhaps, or do you find that digital notes suit you better?
      I'm asking this because I am about to start my studies (finally) and am curious about how other people handle this task which, honestly, has been a nuisance through all my life. I'm not the best at organizing my notes and I believe it harms my studying overall.

      16 votes