What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I've started to date a lovely woman, and she's now allowed me to know that she has Dissociative Identity Disorder. I've done my best to read and watch information about the 'disorder' but I was wondering if anyone has had any experiences that might they're willing to share.

I know that everyone is different, and there's no set way anyone who has it acts or behaves.

This thread can be used for general recommendations for anyone, but I'm specifically looking for a daily sunscreen I can wear on my face and neck.

I'm looking for a holy grail sunscreen that might not even exist (in the US, but I'm willing to import if needed). Here are my preferences:

• Not greasy
• No whitecast
• I'm not allergic to it (this I won't know until I try it -- I'm allergic to "fragrance" which is a relatively useless thing to know -- it just means that any scented product is a roll of the die as to whether or not I react with it because there are thousands of different things that can constitute "fragrance" in a product)

I found what I thought was it: this imported sunscreen. Went on easy, smelled great (green apple!), and legitimately worked.

Unfortunately, I'm allergic to it.

I've since replaced it with this Sun Bum face stick which is similar, but it doesn't go on nearly as easily and the synthetic banana smell is offputting. Nevertheless, I put up with it because 1) it doesn't activate my allergies (yay!) and 2) the banana smell is actually better to me than "regular" sunscreen smell.

Sun Bum actually has a fragrance free mineral sunscreen, but it still smells like sunscreen (which I hate) and it has a really strong whitecast, so it's out.

The Sun Bum I'm using now technically "works" for what I want, but I don't love it. I'm looking to see if there's something out there that I can actually love wearing, especially because I'm going to be doing it daily.

If anyone has any recommendations, please let me know!

I've just started switching my medication and it's been pretty bad for me. Brain zaps are very frequent and I'm crying a lot. I'm struggling.

I've been trying to find out what other people's experience has been like when they switch meds. What is normal and what isn't. People who relate to brain zaps and how they deal with it. Are brain zaps even considered a real thing?

What has your experience been like?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

We have the weekly fitness check-in but I thought it would be valuable to have a thread to discuss more specific lifting topics and resources.

• What type of programs do you gravitate towards?
• Do you compete in Powerlifting/Weightlifting/Strongman or some other discipline? Any upcoming meets worth watching?
• Have you found any resources that others might be interested in?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I was inspired to write this after reading this reddit post. It ranted about people who attempt to disuade people from commiting suicide by telling them that they are selfish because of the impact it will have on other people (I do think it is explained better in the post if you are interested).
However I have also been thinking about how suicide prevention is handled by most governments. I am not sure of exactly what process happens in other countries, but in America if you fail a suicide attempt you can be involuntarily put into a mental health asylum for a temporary period of time, and from reading many accounts of what people have experienced in these asylums and from my ongoing experience with suicidal idealation I very much feel i would be 10x more likely to commit suicide if I was put into such a facility once i got out.
But I also wanted to talk about other ways individuals may try to disuade people from suicide which i find problematic. Before i continue, i do want to say that I am not blaming these people, they have very good intentions. But something that has bugged me for a while has been that whenever people discuss suicide/mental health problems the first thing that is done is just recommending suicide hotlines/telling the person in question to seek a therapist/psychologist. While these options can be good for many people, i want to mention that

1. Suicide hotlines (mainly 811) are known for reporting people to police and having them put in mental health asylums (often times unnecisarlly). And staff at these suicide hotlines are often uneducated or rude to callers, or will just not answer or even hang up.
2. Many people in these circumstances do not have access to trained proffesionals. Even if you live in a country with public healthcare, you may be in a situations (mainly abuse) where you cant get access to one either way.

Anyways sorry for the rambling, my brain is tired and i just wanted to get this out there. But based off of the above points, do you think that suicide prevention in society is flawed, and what could be better? While i do agree that it is flawed and there are ideas related to government on how to handle suicide prevention, i do not know what could be done on the individual level. To me one of my only resources apart from seeing other people experiences online is music (mainly Elliot Smith, Linkin park, Soundgarden and Nirvana) which I deeply relate to. But anhedonia can prevent enjoyment of such things.

My mind is way annoying to listen to and I don’t like it!

I'm 45 years old and I have a hard time coming to term with the fact that the majority of my life---the one which supposedly should had been my golden years---lies in the past. I know I'm still alive but I just can't drum up much enthutiasm for an existence which I mostly see as sad leftovers of something which wasn't worth much either. I simply don't care much. I can distract myself for some time, but I have this deep feeling that, well, what's the point.

And I can ignore it, for some time. But ignorence can only go so far. At some point you need some hope, some sliver of meaning and purpose. And I just don't see it.

And this is all awful impractical, because whenever I try to strive for anything, my brain just goes, “narh, why bother struggle when it doesn’t lead to anything”

Is there any clever way to turn stuff like this around? Some NLP stuff to nudge me towards a less self-defeating mindset?

I'm failing. My usual tricks aren't working and I don't know what to do with my clothes anymore.

One of my ADHD symptoms is that needs to see everything. My "pantry" is open shelves in my kitchen. Everything in the fridge is up near the front of the shelves. I have a giant desk so I can spread out when I'm working. I need to see it all at all times.
So the issue becomes, how do I do that with clothes. My alligator brain wants them all over the floor so I can see everything. That's not gonna work lol. I used to be good with a closet with no doors, but my new apartment isn't laid out in a way I can do that.

Does anyone have any interesting clothes storage advice? The clutter is stressing me out, so I need to figure out whatever my new system is going to be.

Hi, I started trialing contact lenses (toric lenses, specifically) about a month ago, and have had a problem with them making my eyes seriously red. I've tried 3 different brands of contacts now, and the issue has persisted across all three. Has anyone else had a similar experience and figure out how to manage it? Thank you!

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I saw a post on reddit about a guy asking about why his wife changes hobbies so much. He went on to detail her getting super fixated on a hobby, investing a lot of money and learning a lot, and then dropping it. A lot of people were mentioning possibly being adhd.

I remember that being the first thing that clued me in as an adult who was not diagnosed until later in life.

Anyone else care to share?

About 3 or 4 times a year I will get pretty powerful manic episodes. Usually for a few days I'll stay at the office until late at night, I'm in an amazing mood, I'm always excited and have trouble sleeping. My focus is so powerful, If I could be this version of me all of the time I genuinely believe I could do anything.

It's like a totally different person from my usual self who is easily fatigued, slow to start, and generally lethargic.

Knowing this side of me exists is exciting but also kind of depressing given my awareness of its fleeting nature. How have you dealt with this? Any reading you could recomend?

I'm working on pruning the sources of information that come into my Readwise/Read Later feeds down based on usefulness/actionable in my life and quality. My priorities are for data sources to expand my 'reality tunnel', to provide unique insights (not an echo chamber), and to remove a lot of the 'noise' of the day-to-day information overload. I'm considering what those sources might be. If you have a moment, I'd appreciate your thoughts, advice, and links to any writings or videos that speak to this similar goal and how others have done it. Thanks in advance!

Nick Milo said:

The noise is deafening, but I promise to focus on the high-value signal.

I'm seeking to reduce the noise, and increase the signal of my Reader feeds.

I was just diagnosed with osteoporosis which doesn't come as any surprise given that I've lived with severe arthritis all my life.
I have some treatments in process including an infusion (reclast?)
I am 65 and have a history of some significant accidents including being hit by a car as a small child which likely accelerated the condition.
I've also been on opioid pain meds for many years. I have been in the process of stopping these in an effort to see how much pain I can handle. My life is a lot less active in the last 15 years so it seems quite doable at this stage. My entire family died around 2008 and I don't have near the responsibilities that I had in the past.
I have read that these drugs can also accelerate the condition.
But they were necessary and I have no regrets.
It's just depressing and just wanted to share.

This is a thread for everyone to share their personal story. But I'll start with mine.

I was never an obese child. I was always borderline overweight, but I was never at risk for being unhealthy. At 15 I even managed to lose some weight when I did go into the overweight category. And then I graduated high school. I ended up gaining thirty pounds before starting college, and the weight just kept on piling up. Ending with me gaining over 120 pounds, and being over 300 pounds. I was 17 during this time period. I ended up losing quite a bit of weight, down to 218 during the summer following my first year. But I ended up gaining it back and could not go back down.

By the time I graduated college I was back up almost to my original weight. Unfortunately for me, I graduated in Spring of 2020. Right when the pandemic started. This just caused my weight to climb up even more. Even worse, I finally looked in the mirror and realized that my hair was thinning. This was an easier fix: Dutasteride. Got on that pill and that started growing my hair. You can read more about my struggle with that here. My eating was another ball game.

In late 2021, after being diagnosed with pre-diabetes, I decided to lose some weight. I did Keto, not because I felt like that was the only way to lose weight, but because I had read that was the best diet to reverse pre-diabetes. I did that for three months and it did indeed crushed my A1C number, and I lost a fair amount of weight. The problem was that when I got off the diet I gained a lot of weight back. Not all of it, but enough to make a difference. Keto was not a sustainable diet, but on top of that my thought process was "when this ends I'm gonna eat this I'm gonna eat that."

One day I take a pretty hardcore edible. Weed has an anxious effect on me and constantly makes me reflect on my own life and how unhappy I am with it. But this one time it made me realize how much of what was wrong with my life, or how much of what I did not like about my life was connected to my weight. And how many insecurities me being obese gave me. And how it was holding me back from doing what I wanted to do. It also made me realize why I used food as a coping mechanism, and it made me come to terms with the fact that on some level I had an addiction to food.

So that was actually very helpful, and I was able to move on, and actually commit. It helped me to recognize the signs of overeating, and made me pause whenever I would grab something to eat. I would eventually also start lifting weights and focusing on eating a lot of protein. And that helped me lose fat more than Keto ever did. Just the consistency of that was a lot better and honestly easier than the incredibly restrictive diet Keto is. I still struggle with food. I can't really eat chips, or popcorn, because I will finish the whole bag whether I want to or not. But it's gotten slightly easier, at the very least I've gotten better at trying to avoid things like that.

It's completely altered the way that I look. I just recently saw some family that hadn't seen me in a while, and they did not recognize me. My face is much more visible now. When I would get high I would look in the mirror and not recognize myself but now I do. Part of that problem is that I hadn't actually seen myself properly in a mirror since high school until this recent weight loss. So I was just completely delusional, by choice, about what I looked like. I look at old pictures and go "damn that's how I really was huh."

Now that I'm close to being the same weight I was back in high school, I feel more like me. I feel like I look more like how I perceived myself. I'm not scared to look in the mirror anymore. I'm not scared to take pictures anymore. I'm not scared to try on clothes anymore.

What's really been a trip is the fact that people find me attractive again. I don't want to sound conceited, but I am in fact not ugly. But my face was hidden under the weight. So for years nobody really found me attractive, and that's fair now that I've seen pictures of myself from that time (on top of me having no confidence back then). But now they do again. And it's going to take a little bit of getting used to, but damn it feels good. It feels good to finally date, to have the confidence to go out. It feels good for people to think that I'm 19 instead of thinking that I'm 30.

And I feel so much younger. I'm still in my early 20s, but before now I felt old. Like I felt like my body was falling apart. With how much my hips hurt, with how much my knees hurt, how slow I was. I remember when I was 20 my ankle hurt so much. There was like so much pressure on it and it would not pop. And then when I finally did pop it I had to continually pop it to feel relief. That's gone now. My joints pop a normal amount now rather than the excessive amount. I can crouch, I can get up from the floor, I can walk longer easily. Stuff that I should have been doing this entire time that felt almost impossible to do.

It's like I've been rejuvenated. Like I've been given a second chance to enjoy my youth.

And I really really don't want to mess it up again.

Symptoms from my diagnoses of bipolar 2 and social anxiety disorder kept me from working, socializing, forming relationships, and living independently for more than a decade.

I worked my ass off to improve my wellness, and for the past 6 years I have worked as a Peer Support Specialist for 2 different public agencies. I tell my story to other people with mental health and substance issues as part of my work. If anyone’s interested, I’d love to share it here too.

I've done a large amount of research and got a consultation a few months ago, my doctor said I could get PRK as SMILE and LASIK weren't good options for my cornea. As I understand it the results should be very similar, just a longer/more painful recovery time. I've got family who is going to come into town for a week to help me with anything, but I wanted to know if any of you have gone through PRK and had advice or an experience to share.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I figured I would help kick off this new subgroup by starting a discussion on how people with ADHD try to manage it.

I had a late diagnosis a couple years ago as an adult, and I have been working with a counselor to develop some behavioral techniques (in addition to medication). Not all of them stick, which in my experiences is the primary challenge of this disorder, but I've had good results when I do use them.

Primarily, I have a calendar where I put reminders and plan things out. If I have parts of a project I need to get done, I lay those out and assign them to certain days of the week. Working in academia, I live my life a semester at a time and this helps me reevaluate certain goals and it feels reasonable to me to plan out a few months at a time.

One thing I struggle with when it comes to planning is coming up with accurate estimates of how much time it might take to spend something. This was always a big obstacle in my way when it came to planning things out before - I wanted to know the exact time on how long it took to do something so that my schedule would be perfect. My counselor suggested that I come up with an initial estimate of how long something should take based off my intuition, and then double it (e.g. if I think a task should take 30 minutes, plot it out for 60 minutes of my day). This has been great for me because usually it's a win-win. Often, my initial assessment is underestimating how long something takes, so by accounting for slippage in time I can better chunk out my day. On the other hand, if I do get it done sooner I can pat myself on the back and I now have extra time in the day to get other things done.

I wanna find better ways of trying to stay on track with habits. I've tried some different apps and none are working too well. Recently I picked up Sunsama which has helped in terms of reviewing the day and looking at subtasks, but as I've gotten busy with experiments I've kind of lost track of that. What are some things that you do to accommodate the way your brains works?

The past few years I have been gradually starting to use ASMR to relax. I have had increasing bouts of anxiety and can't take too many kinds of medications since I am on blood thinners. So I rely on different relaxation methods to get me through.
I am fond of shoe and purse tapping but can't take mouth noises. Actually most tapping sounds seem to be the best fit for my ears. Maybe the occasional crinkling here and there. Perhaps even some whispered talking but I prefer just the sounds.
Some of these folks really go out in their productions. It's been amazing watching the evolution over the years.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I have taken supplements, but they are not very effective. Honestly, I don't want to rely on medication when our bodies are perfectly suitable with enough sunlight exposure.

I've been researching this for a while and can't find sources that show the difference according to latitude. I stupidly didn't bookmark what I read so what I say is based on what I've read but can't link to any of it :(.

• I gather there is research that around noon time sun exposure (e.g. 11am-3pm) results in greater production. The skin's processes are optimised for that time.
• I am very aware of the risks of skin cancer.
• I read in the UK about 13 minutes for 3 days a week, just between April and September is adequate for vitamin D levels year round.
• I live on the tropic of cancer so I'm expecting perhaps 7-10 minutes. Anything specific to that sub-tropical latitude would be greatly appreciated.

All advice is welcome, but links that I can read, compare and digest myself especially for different latitudes round the world would be perfect.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

So it is 80 degrees fahrenheit here today which usually would not be an issue for me but today I was too hot and sweaty. I am perimenopausal (49 years old) and I knew that could mess with heat tolerance. What I had not realized until today is that heat intolerance is also a side effect of many blood pressure medicines, antidepressants and allergy meds. And I am on all of those now.

I have just ordered some gadget that is a fan that goes around my neck and can be recharged via USB which seemed worth trying. And of course I will drink plenty of water, and try to stay in air conditioning whenever I can. Any other advice on how to deal with increased sensitivity to heat / higher heat intolerance? It is still early enough in the summer that the worst summer heat here is yet to come, so having some more tips might help me. Thanks!

Hey all, my partner is newly paraplegic post spine surgery and while he's been disabled through our ten years together this is new. He's using a power wheelchair and has to transfer by Hoyer lift. And in the six days since he was discharged from the rehab (PT and OT) hospital he's been to the ER twice. We have home health set up. But all of a sudden my life is a lot more... Stressful is understating it. He's going through his own emotional journey and getting support so I was hoping to find some connections, suggestions and the like here.

Right now I'm feeling a ton of pressure not to let any of the various balls I'm juggling drop. Something that feels unsustainable, particularly with my ADHD. I feel like I'm only getting this far due to stress compensating for my lack of medication (it's packed from our recent move, I'll find it or get a new script I just haven't yet). My partner's in a rush to get a wheelchair van and I don't know if we're making a good purchase and it feels like everything has to be handled right now but also for the rest of our lives.

Are there devices that are must haves? Things I need to know about wheelchair vans? Empathy from fellow caretakers?

I have been running for 10 years. Since October 2019 I have run everyday without missing a single day. During the week I have little time and run 2-3 miles but on the weekends I try for 5-6 miles. I have made the occasional 10+ mile runs and find that at some point around mile 7 it becomes "How far can I really go today if I get through this mile." The only motivator I have is not breaking my daily run streak, nothing fancy. I know others have motivators to get into shape for a marathon or other event. What's your running motivation?

I have lost my r/finch community, and am feeling curious to see if there are any folks here who also find apps can be helpful for their mental health.

I struggle with anxiety and am processing a lot of grief, and may or may not have ADHD (I am in the process of getting tested, but it takes a while). My experiences with therapy are a bit mixed, so I am currently going down the route of trying to DIY my wellness a little. Starting simple with things like, sleep more, try to focus on drinking enough, go out in nature, switching off podcasts and phones and reading more. It's actually helped me, bit by bit.

One of my 'tools' is an app called finch, a virtual pet that encourages you to set goals, check in how you are feeling, journal, do mindful breathing and such. I tried many things and this app is the one that stuck and actually works.

Just wanted to ask, do any others here use wellness apps? And have they worked for you? Which do you recommend?

Just to be clear, I mean apps that work as a stand alone solution, rather than apps like 'better help' which ultimately just connect you to a therapist. Although Better Help has its uses too!

My hypoglycemia issues are not related to diabetes fwiw. That said, I tend to get hypoglycemia a few times a day. If I catch it quick enough and treat, it's usually not a big deal, but if I get too low (maybe once I get into the 50s mg/dl), then after treating (usually about 15 minutes later), I get so. freaking. tired. Like, barely able to stand up exhausted. Currently dealing with this as we speak, and it's very frustrating. My endocrinologist told me it's normal to get tired like this while recovering. I'm curious if anyone else deals with this? If so, do you have any advice for dealing with the fatigue?

Tildes might be too small of a platform for this. If no one deals with hypoglycemia here, please feel free to remove it. I thought with the prevalence of diabetes, it would be likely there are folks who encounter this.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Every person in my household takes a daily regimen of prescription medication and/or supplements. We keep ending up in situations where we run out of something because we don’t have a good way to keep track of our remaining supply of each thing. We need a better system for managing this!

We each use a 28-day (4 week) pill dispenser box which helps somewhat. I refill the dispensers when they are empty. The problem is, some of the medications run out in the last week of the dispenser. At the time I fill it, it’s way too early to call the pharmacy for a refill. But by the time the supply runs out I’ve forgotten about it and have to scramble to get more. I hope I’m explaining that clearly. It’s complicated because every medication runs out on a different schedule.

If you’ve got a solution to this problem please share it!

A recent thread had me reflecting on my own mental health journey and what really made a difference for me, I was interested in opening a discussion about what other people found most valuable too. I'll add my own as a comment.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I’m training for a 10K race in September. The app I’m using this time includes tempo runs - I’ve never done one before! When I looked it up the speed advice was pretty vague (hard but controlled) or dependent on your race time (85-90% of your 5k race speed). I find both of these pretty confusing! I recently did a 7km race at an average speed of 6.20/km and did the jogging portion of this run at about that speed (I wasn’t trying to run fast in my 7km, only to finish!); I did the tempo portion of my run at about 5.45/km, but I found it pretty tough and also found it hard to maintain a speed without constantly checking my watch.

Any tips here?

Hi everyone! I am new to Tildes and wanted to say hi to the ~Health community. I am on a 28 hour emergency general surgery call today and have a bit of downtime. I also noticed that the post on the moral crisis of America's doctors had some interest so I thought I would answer any questions about that or training to be a surgeon in the United States. I am finishing my 2nd year of a 7-year training program. Ask me (almost) anything!

...When I can't complete a task right now but instead have to wait for some reason. For example:

• When I have to complete a task list for school, and would love to just blitz through it all, but have to wait on someone else to fill out some form. Then I get it in an email a day or two later, but have already completely forgotten about the list and things I should do, because something else took over my mind. And I put it off because I have other things to do. Then the deadline comes and goes, and I'm sitting there thinking "Well shit, if I could have done it immediately then it would have been fine."

• I ask my kids for things they want at the store. I know I need to add it to the grocery list app immediately or I won't remember it, but I'm driving them to camp and can't use my phone. By the time I've dropped them off, I forgot already. Then they're upset with me because I forgot their things, and I'm upset with me because I forgot their things.

All these little things that just add up to make life a little more frustrating and annoying.

Anyone else with ADHD, have any tips to overcome these? Frustrations of your own to vent? How do you explain to others that it isn't you being careless or lazy, but instead it's your brain working against itself?

This is something I picked up a few years ago, but basically, my logic is that:

• It's what evolution designed us for (shoes only go back about 40,000 years)
• Objects on the ground aren't a threat if you watch where you're going, unless you're someplace you'd probably rather not walk even in shoes
• Hookworm is actually species specific, and human hookworm isn't an actual threat unless you're in a third world country (or Alabama, apparently)
• It's the thickest skin on your body (especially if it's given the chance to "properly" develop), so general dirt is a non-issue
• It's actually probably more hygienic considering you probably clean your feet much more frequently than your shoes (which are warm, moist and dark)
• As an extra, the health department (any health department) actually doesn't care what customers do - feel free to verify this yourself

You kind of have to retrain yourself, as far as both gait (forefoot strike instead of heel strike) and gaze ("scan" ahead every few seconds), but you absolutely can acclimate to it, so thoughts of "I could never!" are probably wrong.

I have a very close friend that has been in the deepest troughs of depression for the past couple of years. They live about an hour away, so though my wife and I try to physically show up to support them whenever we can, that's much less often than we'd like. Their support network is thin, and day-to-day basically consists of only their partner, with whom they live, and who is visibly fraying at the seams.

This person (I'll just call them John for the sake of readability) is currently on medication for their depression and OCD (I'm nearly certain it's Lexapro, can't remember for sure) and has on and off therapy, though they often find themselves at odds with their therapists' perspectives. Some of this is because it feels like the profession has been flooded with folks who lack experience with patients with severe chronic mental illness, and some of this is (I suspect) John's illness distorting their thinking, leading to frustration and anger in the moment that doesn't make sense in retrospect.

John had a particularly bad day yesterday, and after I spent some time with them, we started talking about how they felt like they needed considerably more support than they were able to get in their current situation. Unfortunately, the only option he was aware of was "group homes", which seems like a pretty broad term and I don't know much about what they look like (or how successful they are at helping people like John).

I'm trying to get a sense of the spectrum of options available for people like John who are suffering from severe chronic mental illness. On the one end, there's what we're doing now; regular psychiatry and counseling, and on the other end, I guess, is involuntary in-patient behavioral health/medicine clinics. Being involuntarily committed to such programs has been a source of trauma for them in the past, so I'd like to avoid anything even close to that end of the spectrum, if possible. I know that there are, for example, 90-day rehabilitation centers for folks with substance use disorders (I have a family member that found a lot of success at one of these), but do similar programs exist for folks non-substance-related mental illness? Does anyone have personal experience with any of these programs?

Thanks in advance to anyone who takes a moment to read and share their thoughts; I know this is a really challenging topic.

I'm writing this post in the spirit of the powerful conversations that I had participated in on reddit in /r/adhd. I'm giving up reddit, after this recent fiasco. And, so, I hope to find a similar community here.

And, so, here we go.

I recently quit my job in Big Tech after 7 years in that space. Corporate America, and Big Tech in particular (among other fields) is a human meat grinder. Humans go in and husks come out. After taking a medical leave of absence from work due to complications from anxiety, and multiple medical interventions, I realized that I needed to evaluate whether my job, even my career, was sustainable for me. It only took a few weeks, after returning to work, to accept that, yes, this job and perhaps this career are actively harming me. After talking about it with my wife, at length, I found relief in quitting.

At the core of it: my career has simply been incongruent with my values.

Sure, I've always been a nerd. I was the "brainy" kid. I didn't know how to people well (though I'm told that I'm not on the spectrum or not in any meaningful way). I'd always been overweight and prone to stress. Throughout my life, I was often labeled as the "sensitive" one by people. I rarely felt as though I fit in with any group of people, save perhaps for the other misfits who would band together because they didn't with in with any group of people.

Just before the pandemic began, at the tender age of 47, I was diagnosed with ADHD Combined type. More recently, I was diagnosed with C-PTSD, that I have likely suffered for 40 of my 50 years.

Now I know where that weight comes from: self-medication to give me a dopamine hit and numb me to layers of trauma. I also know where the emotional reactivity comes from: emotional flashbacks resulting from the C-PTSD.

1. Lexapro for well over a decade. It helped to blunt the lows but, I've found, also the highs. I rarely feel poignancy with Lexapro. When I have occasionally been able to ween from it, I have felt a far greater range of emotions.
2. I've had an excellent therapist for going on 8 years who practices ISTDP. He's helped me learn to show up for my more challenging emotions instead of instantly reaching to numb them.
3. Adderall and Vyvanse both used to help until I received a stellate ganglion block (Disclaimer: I have been a client of Dr Mulvaney's practice though I link to it as his explanation is excellent; I'd make this a footnote alas tildes doesn't support that extension for markdown)
4. Ketamine (prescribed) to better address the depression and anxiety. Ketamine, as a psychedelic, combined with the skills learned in therapy has let me dig deeper into my layers of trauma, leading to better overall mental health and better self-understanding.
5. Stellate Ganglion Block mentioned above. Short version: it reduced my seemingly PTSD-driven emotional reactivity to about 10% of what it was prior to the SGB. It's like getting a new nervous system. Unexpected side effect: medications that act on my nervous system now respond differently. As a result, stimulants are now extremely uncomfortable for me whereas before they were effective. Before the SGB, I would say that fear was my primary emotion. Now, I feel things.

I know: I'm privileged. I'm an "old white dude who profited from being in Tech". Yep. True. But I can't retire yet; we don't have that kind of money. We do, however, have enough such that I have the luxury of time to figure out my next steps.

What I have right now is the plan to make a plan. The core of it: live a life congruent with my values--not just at some far off retirement but here, now.

At first, step 1 was to answer this question: "What is the minimum amount of money that I need to earn for us to not massively disrupt our lives?" But then I realized that this is a fear-based question. It means starting out by saying "no" to everything that doesn't earn "enough" money for some arbitrary value of enough.

Where I'm at now, Step 1 Mark II, poses a more inspiring question: "What does retirement look like for my wife and I?" I don't know that we truly get to retire in the sense of living a life of leisure as seemingly many Boomers and earlier were privileged to do. Besides, part of my sense of accomplishment and peace is knowing that I did something to make the world better.

So what do you struggle with?
How are you doing?
What are you doing about it?

Be well.

P.S. This is me trying to do my part, as a new member of this community, to encourage growth not in membership but into different areas of discussion.

After years and years of sitting in front of a computer I have poor hamstring flexibility.

The thing is i've been lifting weights pretty regularly for at least 8 years now and have good numbers on squat, deadlift, bench. I do a lot of romanian deadlifts and kettlebell swings.

But these don't seem to help with sitting at 90º with my legs straight.

I can search for flexibility routine, but the internet these days are full of ad riddled and generic content that I'm having a hard time filtering through the bullshit and finding something that says "do this 3 times per week, progress like this, etc". They just throw some stretches at you and don't say exactly how to progress and what to look for.

It's not like lifting weights that you put more weight on the bar to quantify things easily.