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    1. What are your favorite books in the horror (or horror-adjacent) genre?

      I'm always looking recommendations for my next read. I haven't read many "pure" horror books this year, but I would like to recommend The Raw Shark Texts and The Library at Mt. Char. The former...

      I'm always looking recommendations for my next read. I haven't read many "pure" horror books this year, but I would like to recommend The Raw Shark Texts and The Library at Mt. Char. The former especially leads to some great discussions between readers.

      39 votes
    2. What were your out-of-warranty Tesla issues?

      Model 3 SR+ about to go out of warranty. Wondering what others have had to fix out-of-pocket since their warranties expired? Under warranty, I’ve had service for: replace front passenger control...

      Model 3 SR+ about to go out of warranty. Wondering what others have had to fix out-of-pocket since their warranties expired?

      Under warranty, I’ve had service for:

      • replace front passenger control arm
      • replace both rear upper suspension links
      • replace touchscreen
      • replace metal tips that are on the charging port
      • replace front passenger seat adjustment switch
      • replace front passenger seat (yes the whole thing)
      • replace the front driver lower camera (twice)
      • resealed both front upper control arm ball joints with urethane
      • replaced rear passenger door trim panel
      • wipers made contact with the hood causing a small gouge in the hood
      • replaced front passenger door handle

      Mind you this was one of the first batch of 2019s so, yeah they had to remediate quite a bit.

      13 votes
    3. Lego - what do you do with it afterwards?

      Hey there LEGO enthusiasts - wondering what you all do with kits after you build them? I really enjoy building LEGO (especially large complicated sets) but I don't want LEGO models taking over my...

      Hey there LEGO enthusiasts - wondering what you all do with kits after you build them? I really enjoy building LEGO (especially large complicated sets) but I don't want LEGO models taking over my house and getting dusty. What do you do?

      42 votes
    4. Can you help recommend books and documentaries?

      I’m always looking for a good new book or, on lesser occasions, a good documentary. I love reading about “how stuff works”, astrophysics (space and its sheer size are insane to me), and oddly,...

      I’m always looking for a good new book or, on lesser occasions, a good documentary. I love reading about “how stuff works”, astrophysics (space and its sheer size are insane to me), and oddly, random fantasy stuff like wizarding worlds, etc.
      Judgements aside I like reading Harry Potter and some of the books by Neil Degrasse Tyson as well as watching Cosmos (Carl and Neil both).

      What hidden gems do you have?

      19 votes
    5. What is the best way to be involved in a forum discussion

      I signed onto Reddit six years ago because that was where I could discuss stuff I liked intelligently. Due to social awkwardness and poor conversational skills, I feel like I contribute nothing to...

      I signed onto Reddit six years ago because that was where I could discuss stuff I liked intelligently. Due to social awkwardness and poor conversational skills, I feel like I contribute nothing to the conversation anywhere, on forums or IRL. I even signed up for Stack Exchange, Hacker News, and Ars Techinca for discussion, but they all look like you need a Ph.D. to contribute anything meaningful?

      Am I alone on this? How can I be a productive part of the conversation?

      23 votes
    6. I, and many other like me, have a responsibility with invite codes

      I’ve been here three days. I’ve only just begun to scratch the surface of what makes this place tick, and have only had a glimpse of the culture encouraged here - and I love what I’ve seen thus...

      I’ve been here three days. I’ve only just begun to scratch the surface of what makes this place tick, and have only had a glimpse of the culture encouraged here - and I love what I’ve seen thus far.

      Thanks to @deimos I now have five invites to share. Sure, they’ll be tracked if I’m being irresponsible by sharing them with nutcase randos, or if I put them up for sale on eBay (obviously I won’t!).

      But I love this place so much already that I’m going to be super selective in my distribution.

      I love that responsibility! As a newbie I get to be adulting, and it’s SO welcoming!

      49 votes
    7. What do you struggle with, how are you doing, and (how) do you try to get better?

      I'm writing this post in the spirit of the powerful conversations that I had participated in on reddit in /r/adhd. I'm giving up reddit, after this recent fiasco. And, so, I hope to find a similar...

      I'm writing this post in the spirit of the powerful conversations that I had participated in on reddit in /r/adhd. I'm giving up reddit, after this recent fiasco. And, so, I hope to find a similar community here.

      And, so, here we go.

      I recently quit my job in Big Tech after 7 years in that space. Corporate America, and Big Tech in particular (among other fields) is a human meat grinder. Humans go in and husks come out. After taking a medical leave of absence from work due to complications from anxiety, and multiple medical interventions, I realized that I needed to evaluate whether my job, even my career, was sustainable for me. It only took a few weeks, after returning to work, to accept that, yes, this job and perhaps this career are actively harming me. After talking about it with my wife, at length, I found relief in quitting.

      At the core of it: my career has simply been incongruent with my values.

      Sure, I've always been a nerd. I was the "brainy" kid. I didn't know how to people well (though I'm told that I'm not on the spectrum or not in any meaningful way). I'd always been overweight and prone to stress. Throughout my life, I was often labeled as the "sensitive" one by people. I rarely felt as though I fit in with any group of people, save perhaps for the other misfits who would band together because they didn't with in with any group of people.

      Just before the pandemic began, at the tender age of 47, I was diagnosed with ADHD Combined type. More recently, I was diagnosed with C-PTSD, that I have likely suffered for 40 of my 50 years.

      Now I know where that weight comes from: self-medication to give me a dopamine hit and numb me to layers of trauma. I also know where the emotional reactivity comes from: emotional flashbacks resulting from the C-PTSD.

      1. Lexapro for well over a decade. It helped to blunt the lows but, I've found, also the highs. I rarely feel poignancy with Lexapro. When I have occasionally been able to ween from it, I have felt a far greater range of emotions.
      2. I've had an excellent therapist for going on 8 years who practices ISTDP. He's helped me learn to show up for my more challenging emotions instead of instantly reaching to numb them.
      3. Adderall and Vyvanse both used to help until I received a stellate ganglion block (Disclaimer: I have been a client of Dr Mulvaney's practice though I link to it as his explanation is excellent; I'd make this a footnote alas tildes doesn't support that extension for markdown)
      4. Ketamine (prescribed) to better address the depression and anxiety. Ketamine, as a psychedelic, combined with the skills learned in therapy has let me dig deeper into my layers of trauma, leading to better overall mental health and better self-understanding.
      5. Stellate Ganglion Block mentioned above. Short version: it reduced my seemingly PTSD-driven emotional reactivity to about 10% of what it was prior to the SGB. It's like getting a new nervous system. Unexpected side effect: medications that act on my nervous system now respond differently. As a result, stimulants are now extremely uncomfortable for me whereas before they were effective. Before the SGB, I would say that fear was my primary emotion. Now, I feel things.

      I know: I'm privileged. I'm an "old white dude who profited from being in Tech". Yep. True. But I can't retire yet; we don't have that kind of money. We do, however, have enough such that I have the luxury of time to figure out my next steps.

      What I have right now is the plan to make a plan. The core of it: live a life congruent with my values--not just at some far off retirement but here, now.

      At first, step 1 was to answer this question: "What is the minimum amount of money that I need to earn for us to not massively disrupt our lives?" But then I realized that this is a fear-based question. It means starting out by saying "no" to everything that doesn't earn "enough" money for some arbitrary value of enough.

      Where I'm at now, Step 1 Mark II, poses a more inspiring question: "What does retirement look like for my wife and I?" I don't know that we truly get to retire in the sense of living a life of leisure as seemingly many Boomers and earlier were privileged to do. Besides, part of my sense of accomplishment and peace is knowing that I did something to make the world better.

      So what do you struggle with?
      How are you doing?
      What are you doing about it?

      Be well.

      P.S. This is me trying to do my part, as a new member of this community, to encourage growth not in membership but into different areas of discussion.

      41 votes
    8. AEW Dynamite weekly discussion thread: June 14, 2023

      I don't know if I'll do this every week but I figured now is as good a time as any to start. With their new show AEW Collision premiering this Saturday on TNT at 8pm Eastern featuring the return...

      I don't know if I'll do this every week but I figured now is as good a time as any to start. With their new show AEW Collision premiering this Saturday on TNT at 8pm Eastern featuring the return of CM Punk, their upcoming Wembly Stadium All In PPV (which is their equivalent to Wrestlemania), and the Forbidden Door collaboration show with New Japan Pro Wrestling, there has never been a better time to jump into AEW. That being said, welcome to the very first AEW Dynamite tildes discussion thread for June 14, 2023! We're returning to the Capital One Arena in Washington D.C., home of the very first episode of Dynamite that I was fortunate enough to attend.

      MATCH CARD

      World Title Eliminator: MJF vs Adam Cole

      After a break from the spotlight, AEW World Champion MJF is stepping back into the ring to face Adam Cole in a high-stakes World title eliminator. Can Cole seize the moment to secure his title shot, or will MJF demonstrate the truth in his claims of a lack of competition?

      Trios Match: Blackpool Combat Club vs The Hung Bucks

      Riding the wave of their victory over The Elite at Double or Nothing 2023 PPV, the Blackpool Combat Club—made up of Jon Moxley, Claudio Castagnoli, & Wheeler Yuta—are set to square off once again against Hangman Adam Page and The Young Bucks. Can they replicate their previous success, or will The Hung Bucks turn the tables?

      Women’s Title Match: Toni Storm (c) vs Skye Blue

      In the first defense of her second reign, Toni Storm is up against Skye Blue, the current #1 contender after winning the 4 way last week. Will Skye Blue bring another upset and put an early end to Storm's first "non-interim" reign or will The Outcasts interfere as usual?

      TNT Title Match: Wardlow (c) vs Jake Hager

      Even as his feud with Christian Cage and Luchasaurus continues, Wardlow has issued an open challenge for his TNT Championship this week on Dynamite. Jake Hager has stepped up to the plate. Can he prove to be more than a practice match for Wardlow or will Wardlow get his win back from their MMA rules match a few years back?

      8-man Tag Team Match: Mogul Embassy vs Sting, Darby Allin, Keith Lee, and Orange Cassidy

      The Mogul Embassy, led by Swerve Strickland, is set to confront their rivals in a massive 8-man tag team match. Can they overcome the combined forces of Sting, Allin, Lee, and 'Freshly Squeezed' Orange Cassidy?

      Additional Information

      • Venue: Capital One Arena, Washington D.C.
      • Airing Live On: TBS at 8pm Eastern Time
      18 votes
    9. What have you been listening to this week?

      What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as...

      What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

      Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

      You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

      http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

      Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

      28 votes
    10. People who have visited Reddit over the past few days, what's it like over there right now?

      What's it like over there right now? IIRC the blackout was supposed to finish today. I've decided to quit reddit unless something changes, so I want to do my best not to visit the site, but I am...

      What's it like over there right now? IIRC the blackout was supposed to finish today. I've decided to quit reddit unless something changes, so I want to do my best not to visit the site, but I am very curious about what the website and culture has been like for the past few days. And now that the initial blackout is 'over', how many subreddits have started to emerge again? Are people coming back now and acting like they've won? Has reddit responded to the blackout at all?

      45 votes
    11. What are your investing/trading moves this week?

      Do you expect a Fed rate hike, pause, or rate cut on June 14? I personally believe the Fed will surprise the market with another rate hike because although CPI has cooled, core PCE has remained...

      Do you expect a Fed rate hike, pause, or rate cut on June 14?

      I personally believe the Fed will surprise the market with another rate hike because although CPI has cooled, core PCE has remained sticky and the Fed doesn’t want inflation to rear its ugly head at all costs.

      According to the CNN Fear & Greed Index we are at “extreme greed” levels not seen since February 3rd, which also coincided with a temporary market top.

      This leads me to believe the market will begin to fall over the next few weeks until we hit “fear” or “extreme fear” levels again around July.

      13 votes
    12. Can someone explain the Fediverse?

      As the title says, could someone explain the Fediverse or this whole concept of federated instances? I looked at Mastodon a few months back and recently at Lemmy and read a few articles and I...

      As the title says, could someone explain the Fediverse or this whole concept of federated instances?

      I looked at Mastodon a few months back and recently at Lemmy and read a few articles and I still don't quite get it. I joined a Lemmy instance but didn't see any content from other instances. (God this makes me feel old)

      To me, a non techie (who is reasonably computer literate), the problem with all these federation based platforms is that they don't seem immediately intuitive to laypeople.

      It also seems to have the problem of individual instances being quite parochial in that there seem to be a lot of niche instances but few that are necessarily generic for an international audience, or conversely instances that are too vague ('this is an instance for humans') whereas with something like Reddit you just sign up and post in subs just like vbulletin based forums and subforums back in the day. Tildes is essentially similar in principle.

      Please feel free to tell me, if I'm an old man yelling at the Cloud.

      77 votes
    13. A new Ex-Mormon community

      In the worst case scenario that Reddit dies; I'm going to miss the /r/exmormon community the most. It's a religion that is not easy to leave (many societal repercussions); and many ex-members...

      In the worst case scenario that Reddit dies; I'm going to miss the /r/exmormon community the most. It's a religion that is not easy to leave (many societal repercussions); and many ex-members experiencing a "faith transition" rely on the discussions in that sub (275K+ subscribers).

      22 votes
    14. What are you 3D printing now? What setup do you have? What issues are you running into?

      I'm personally a little busy for 3d printing at the moment - but I love to see and be inspired by what others are doing. I know this is text based, but I'm also interested in what issues you are...

      I'm personally a little busy for 3d printing at the moment - but I love to see and be inspired by what others are doing. I know this is text based, but I'm also interested in what issues you are running into. I find it useful to see examples of what common problems and solutions others are running into.

      I've got an "old" Prusa MK3S that is still going strong for me. When I get the time again I've got a few projects lined up: a brain, a mask, and a fluid desk sculpture that I'm excited to get printing.

      What have you been printing lately?

      28 votes
    15. Diablo IV works on the Steam Deck

      Just tested it myself. Here’s the process that worked for me, in case anyone else needs a guide. No guarantees, of course, but hopefully it works for others too: From Desktop Mode Download the...

      Just tested it myself. Here’s the process that worked for me, in case anyone else needs a guide. No guarantees, of course, but hopefully it works for others too:


      From Desktop Mode

      Download the Battle.net installer
      Add the installer as a non-Steam game
      Change the installer settings in Steam to run with Proton Experimental
      Run the installer
      (tip: to make it easy to find the launcher in the next step, you can change the install path to be in your downloads folder instead of deep in the Proton path)

      Once installed, exit the installer
      Add the installed Battle.net Launcher.exe as a non-Steam game
      Change the launcher settings in Steam to run it with Proton Experimental
      Run the launcher
      Log in
      Install Diablo IV
      (tip: uncheck the high res textures option which is on by default to save yourself about 40 GB of space)
      Close launcher
      (tip: if D4 is the only Bnet game you’re planning on playing, you can rename the launcher in Steam to Diablo IV)

      From Gaming Mode

      Launch the launcher
      Click the Play button on Diablo IV
      Enjoy!


      Other Tips

      During installation or the game, whenever you need a keyboard, press STEAM + X to call it up.

      Occasionally, during installation or in the Launcher in game mode, my trackpad input would get wonky or stop responding. When this happens, hold the STEAM button down while using the trackpads, and they should work again.

      Beyond that, the game automatically worked from me. It loaded low graphics settings (which are perfect for the Deck) and recognized my controller. It even opens with some accessibility settings before you start playing that lets you scale the font size up too, which makes it easier to read on the small screen.

      I can’t say much about how the game actually plays as I really just did this to test if it works. I’ll be putting in my first actual time with the game tomorrow.

      34 votes
    16. 76th Tony Awards, 2023

      I'm following the New York Times' liveblog and list of winners; I'll try to update this post. Best Play: “Leopoldstadt” “Leopoldstadt,” a wrenching drama that explores the destructive toll of...

      I'm following the New York Times' liveblog and list of winners; I'll try to update this post.


      • Best Play: “Leopoldstadt”

      “Leopoldstadt,” a wrenching drama that explores the destructive toll of antisemitism by following a family of Viennese Jews through the first half of the 20th century, won the Tony Award for best play on Sunday night.

      The play is by Tom Stoppard, an 85-year-old British playwright who is widely regarded as among the greatest living dramatists, and who had already won the best play Tony Award more times than any other writer. This is his 19th production on Broadway since his debut in 1967, and his fifth Tony for best play, following “Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead,” “Travesties,” “The Real Thing” and “The Coast of Utopia.”

      “Leopoldstadt” is an unusually personal work for Stoppard, prompted by his late-in-life reckoning with his Jewish roots, and the realization that many of his relatives were killed in the Holocaust. Stoppard was not yet 2 years old when his own family fled what was then Czechoslovakia, where he was born, to escape the Nazi invasion; he was raised in Britain and has said he only fully came to understand his family’s Jewish heritage when he was much older.

      “Leopoldstadt,” directed by Patrick Marber, was first staged in London, where it opened in 2020, shortly before the coronavirus pandemic forced the shutdown of theaters, and then resumed performances in the West End after theaters reopened in 2021. That production won the Olivier Award for best new play in 2020.

      The Broadway production began previews Sept. 14 and opened Oct. 2 at the Longacre Theater. The run is scheduled to end on July 2.

      The play, named for a historically Jewish section of Vienna, begins in 1899 in the living room of an affluent and assimilated Austrian Jewish family and continues until 1955, after much of the family has perished; some members of the family had mistakenly thought that their integration into Viennese society would somehow protect them.

      The show is quite large for a Broadway play, with a cast of 38, including several children. It was capitalized for up to $8.75 million, according to a filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission.

      The lead producer is Sonia Friedman, a prolific British producer who has notched an impressive set of wins on Broadway: She was also a lead producer of the best play Tony winners in 2020 (“The Inheritance,” which was granted the award at a pandemic-delayed ceremony in 2021), 2019 (“The Ferryman”) and 2018 (“Harry Potter and the Cursed Child”).

      • Best Musical: “Kimberly Akimbo”

      “Kimberly Akimbo,” a small-scale, big-hearted show about a teenage girl coping with a life-shortening genetic condition and a comically dysfunctional family, won the coveted Tony Award for best musical Sunday night.

      The musical is the smallest, and lowest-grossing, of the five nominees in the category, but it was also by far the best reviewed, with virtually unanimous acclaim from critics. (Nodding to the show’s anagram-loving subplot, New York Times critic Jesse Green presciently suggested one of his own last fall: “sublime cast = best musical.”)

      The show, set in 1999 in Bergen County, N.J., stars the 63-year-old Victoria Clark as Kimberly, a 15-going-on-16-year-old girl who has a rare condition that makes her age prematurely. Kimberly’s home life is a mess — dad’s a drunk, mom’s a hypochondriac, and aunt is a gleeful grifter — and her school life is complicated by her medical condition. But she befriends an anagram-obsessed classmate and learns to find joy where she can.

      “Kimberly Akimbo,” which opened at the Booth Theater in November, was written by the playwright David Lindsay-Abaire and the composer Jeanine Tesori, based on a play Lindsay-Abaire had written in 2003. The musical, directed by Jessica Stone, began its life with an Off Broadway production at the nonprofit Atlantic Theater Company in the fall of 2021.

      The musical, with just nine characters, was capitalized for up to $7 million, according to a filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission; that’s a low budget for a musical on Broadway these days, when a growing number of shows are costing more than $20 million to stage. The lead producer is David Stone, who, as a lead producer of “Wicked,” is one of Broadway’s most successful figures; this is the first time he has won a Tony Award for best musical.

      • Best Revival of a Play: "Topdog/Underdog"

      A new production of “Topdog/Underdog,” Suzan-Lori Parks’s tour de force about two Black brothers weighted down by history and circumstance, won the Tony Award for best play revival Sunday night.

      The play, first staged at the Public Theater in 2001, was already a widely hailed masterpiece: In 2002 it won the Pulitzer Prize for Drama, making Parks the first African American woman awarded that prize, and in 2018 a panel of New York Times critics declared it the best American play of the previous quarter century.

      The new production, which ran from September 2022 through January 2023 at the John Golden Theater, was directed by Kenny Leon. It starred Corey Hawkins and Yahya Abdul-Mateen II as the two brothers, ominously named Lincoln and Booth.

      In the play, Lincoln works in whiteface as a Lincoln impersonator at an arcade, while Booth makes ends meet by shoplifting. They share a one-room apartment, a fondness for three-card monte, and a set of familial and societal burdens from which they cannot escape. “‘Topdog/Underdog’ is both a vivid, present-tense family portrait and an endlessly reverberating allegory,” the New York Times critic Ben Brantley wrote in 2018.

      • Best Revival of a Musical: "Parade"

      “Parade,” a musical based on the early 20th century lynching of a Jewish businessman in Georgia, won the Tony Award for best musical revival Sunday night.

      The prize cements a remarkable rebirth for the show, which was not successful when it first opened on Broadway in 1998, but which is shaping up to be a hit this time, thanks to strong word-of-mouth and the popularity of its leading man, Ben Platt. It was one of several shows this season about antisemitism, as the number of reported incidents has been rising.

      The success of “Parade” is also a significant milestone for the musical’s composer, Jason Robert Brown, who is widely admired within the theater community but whose Broadway productions have struggled commercially. Brown wrote the music and lyrics for “Parade,” and the book is by Alfred Uhry; both men won Tony Awards for their work on the show in 1999.

      ... Audible groans here as Jason Robert Brown, the composer behind “Parade,” gets cut off at the microphone. He started to say something about Mary Phagan, the girl whose murder in Georgia set the Leo Frank trial in motion.

      • Best Leading Actor in a Play: Sean Hayes, “Good Night, Oscar”, as Oscar Levant

      Sean Hayes, who portrays the witty but troubled pianist Oscar Levant in “Good Night, Oscar,” won the Tony for best lead actor in play.

      Best known for his long-running role as Jack McFarland in the television series “Will & Grace,” Hayes received critical praise for his drastic transformation in this stage production, adopting the hunched posture, irritable scowl and anxious twitching of Levant, who channeled his neuroticism into crowd-pleasing radio and television banter.

      Hayes, 52, has also brought one of his lesser known talents to the stage for this performance: classical piano, which he started studying at age 5.

      Telling the story of one night in 1958 when Levant finagled his way out of psychiatric hospital to be interviewed on Jack Paar’s “Tonight Show,” the play focuses on the pianist’s idiosyncrasies, compulsions and struggles with opioid addiction as surrounding characters try desperately to manage him.

      This is Hayes’s first Tony Award. He was previously nominated for his Broadway debut in the 2010 revival of “Promises, Promises,” a musical adaptation of the Billy Wilder film “The Apartment.”

      • Best Leading Actress in a Play: Jodie Comer, "Prima Facie", as Tessa Ensler

      The leading actress in a play category this year was a face-off of extremes: Jodie Comer, who delivers a physically and emotionally exhausting performance in Suzie Miller’s one-woman legal thriller “Prima Facie,” versus Jessica Chastain, who scarcely stirs from her chair during the entirety of “A Doll’s House.”

      In the end, it was Comer who triumphed, for her tour-de-force solo turn as a lawyer who defends men accused of sexual assault. Jesse Green, the chief theater critic for The New York Times, described it as “a performance of tremendous skill and improbable stamina.”

      It was a remarkable win for the 30-year-old English actress, who is best known for playing the assassin Villanelle on the television show “Killing Eve.” She not only took home her first Tony Award on her first try; she won it for her first performance on a professional stage — ever.

      “It kind of felt unattainable,” she told The Times in April of the prospect of doing theater.

      • Best Leading Actor in a Musical: J. Harrison Ghee, "Some Like It Hot", as Jerry/Daphne

      J. Harrison Ghee, whose portrayal of a gender-questioning musician fleeing the mob in “Some Like It Hot” has charmed critics and audiences, won a Tony Award for best leading actor in a musical Sunday night, becoming the first out nonbinary actor to win that award.

      Ghee’s victory came shortly after Alex Newell, who is also nonbinary, won a Tony Award for best featured actor in a musical, becoming the first out nonbinary performer to win a Tony.

      The Tony Awards, like the Oscars, have only gendered categories for performers, and Ghee and Newell agreed to be considered eligible for awards as actors. (Another nonbinary performer this season, Justin David Sullivan of “& Juliet,” opted not to be considered for awards rather than compete in a gendered category.)

      Asked in a recent interview with The New York Times about having been nominated in a gendered category, Ghee said: “Wherever I am, I will show up as who I am. Someone’s compartmentalization of me doesn’t limit me in any way.

      “I hope for the industry we can remove the gender of it,” they added, “because we are creators and we should free ourselves beyond so many labels and let the work speak for itself.”

      At least two performers who later came out as nonbinary have previously won Tony Awards as best featured actress in a musical: Sara Ramirez, who won in 2005 for “Spamalot,” and Karen Olivo (also known as K O), who won in 2009 for a revival of “West Side Story.” Also: Last year, the Tony Award for best score went to Toby Marlow and Lucy Moss for “Six,” and Marlow is nonbinary.

      Ghee’s depiction of a main character in “Some Like It Hot” reflects the way views on gender have evolved since 1959, when the Billy Wilder film it was based on was released. In the movie Jack Lemmon plays a musician named Jerry who dresses as a woman named Daphne to flee the mob; in the musical Ghee plays the same character, but Jerry’s path to becoming Daphne becomes one of self-discovery, not disguise.

      The performance earned critical praise. Jesse Green, The Times’s chief theater critic, wrote that Ghee “carefully traces Jerry’s transformation into Daphne, and then the merging of the two identities into a third that takes us into territory that’s far more complex than jokey drag.”

      Ghee, 33, worked as a drag performer before finding success in musical theater, with key roles on Broadway in “Kinky Boots” and “Mrs. Doubtfire” before “Some Like It Hot.”

      • Best Leading Actress in a Musical: Victoria Clark, “Kimberly Akimbo”, as Kimberly Levaco

      Victoria Clark won the Tony for best leading actress in a musical on Sunday night for her role in “Kimberly Akimbo,” in which she plays a teenager with a rare disease that causes her to age rapidly.

      As unusual as Clark’s role has been as a sexagenarian playing a gawky teenager with a fatal diagnosis, critics pointed to the pedestrian subtlety with which she imbued her performance.

      “So remote is she from the bellowing divadom of those tourist-bait extravaganzas that I’m tempted to call what she does not singing at all, but acting on pitch,” wrote Jesse Green in his review of the musical for The Times.

      This is Clark’s second award in the category: In 2005, she won for “The Light in the Piazza,” a musical in which she played an American tourist traveling with her daughter — a performance that Ben Brantley of The Times praised as a rare reflection of a “real human being” in an American mainstream musical.

      A veteran stage actress, Clark, 63, has performed on Broadway since the 1980s, earning Tony nominations for featured roles in “Sister Act,” “Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella” and “Gigi.”

      • Best Featured Actor in a Play: Brandon Uranowitz, “Leopoldstadt”, as Ludwig Jakobovicz and Nathan Fischbein

      Brandon Uranowitz, a four-time Tony nominee, won his first Tony Award on Sunday for performing a pair of featured roles in the critically acclaimed play “Leopoldstadt.”

      The play, by Tom Stoppard, follows an Austrian Jewish family — the Merzes — from 1899 to 1955. In the early days, the bourgeois family is comfortable and complacent, shown enjoying time together at holiday gatherings and family functions. But eventually the Nazis arrive, and their lives are upended and destroyed.

      “My impostor syndrome is on fire,” he said in accepting the award.

      “Thank you, Tom Stoppard, for writing a play about Jewish identity and antisemitism and the false promise of assimilation with the nuances and the complexities and the contradictions that they deserve,” he added. “My ancestors, many of whom did not make it out of Poland, also thank you.”

      • Best Featured Actor in a Musical: Alex Newell, "Shucked", as Lulu

      Alex Newell, a “Glee” alumnus who is bringing down the house nightly with a barn-burning number in “Shucked,” won the Tony Award for best featured actor in a musical Sunday night, becoming the first out nonbinary actor to win a Tony for performance.

      Newell, who identifies both as nonbinary and gender fluid, plays a fiercely self-reliant whiskey distiller in “Shucked,” which is a country-scored, pun-rich musical comedy about a small farming community whose corn crop begins mysteriously dying.

      “The standing ovation isn’t jarring as much as the consistency of it,” Newell told The New York Times last month. “I’m beside myself a lot of the time because I’m like, ‘Y’all are really still standing up.’”

      Newell agreed to be considered in the gendered actor category, explaining, “I look at the word ‘actor’ as one, my vocation, and two, genderless. We don’t say plumbess for plumber. We don’t say janitoress for janitor. We say plumber, we say janitor. That’s how I look at the word, and that’s how I chose my category.”

      • Best Featured Actress in a Play: Miriam Silverman, “The Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window”, as Mavis Parodus Bryson

      Miriam Silverman, the only acting nominee from “The Sign in Sidney Brustein’s Window,” has been with this production since its Chicago debut. “I’m always more drawn to complicated, tricky, flawed characters,” she told the Times. “And not trying to make them likable, per se, but just trying to be inside of them in all of their humanity.”

      Alice Ghostley won a Tony for the same role when the play debuted in 1964.

      • Best Featured Actress in a Musical: Bonnie Milligan, “Kimberly Akimbo”, as Aunt Debra

      On Sunday night, Milligan, 39, took home her first Tony Award for best featured actress in a musical, for her scene-stealing performance as Debra, Kimberly’s scheming aunt.

      It was the first Tony nomination for Milligan, known for her vocal range and vocal belting, who made her Broadway debut in 2018 in “Head Over Heels,” a musical that combined a Renaissance pastoral romance with the music of the Go-Go’s.

      • Best Direction of a Play, Patrick Marber, “Leopoldstadt”

      Patrick Marber won his first Tony on Sunday for his direction of the harrowing, critically acclaimed Tom Stoppard play, “Leopoldstadt.”

      Marber, who was previously nominated for directing a 2018 revival of Stoppard’s “Travesties” has also written plays and worked as a stand-up comedian.

      “I’m thrilled to win this,” he said, calling Stoppard one of his heroes.

      • Best Direction of a Musical: Michael Arden, “Parade”

      “‘Parade’ tells the story of a life that was cut short at the hands of the belief that one group of people is more or less valuable than another and that they might be more deserving of justice,” he said in accepting his award. “This is a belief that is the core of antisemitism, of white supremacy, of homophobia, of transphobia and intolerance of any kind. We must come together. We must battle this. It is so, so important, or else we are doomed to repeat the horrors of our history.”

      Arden went on to recall how he had been called a homophobic slur — “the F-word,” he said — many times as a child. And he drew raucous cheers as he reclaimed the slur, making clear that he was now one with a Tony. “Keep raising your voices,” he said.

      One of the production’s most talked-about features is Platt’s wordless presence onstage during the entire 15-minute intermission. Arden recently told Michael Paulson that he “wanted to challenge the audience, when they’re getting their cocktail or texting their friends or talking about what they’re having for dinner, to look back and see Ben onstage, and to get a sense that while the world was turning, this man was sitting in a prison cell.”

      • Best Book of a Musical: David Lindsay-Abaire, "Kimberly Akimbo"

      A tough category this year, with fine work addressing daunting needs. David West Read somehow made a jukebox musical (“& Juliet”) witty. Robert Horn (“Shucked”) came up with more corn puns than anyone thought possible. Matthew López and Amber Ruffin revamped a classic farce (“Some Like It Hot”) as a contemporary exploration of race and gender. But David Lindsay-Abaire may have had the hardest job of all: turning his own play “Kimberly Akimbo” gently, cleverly, ruthlessly into a great musical.

      • Best Original Score: Jeanine Tesori (music) and David Lindsay-Abaire (lyrics), “Kimberly Akimbo”
      • Best Choreography: Casey Nicholaw, “Some Like It Hot”

      Casey Nicholaw won the Tony for best choreography for “Some Like It Hot,” a boisterous Prohibition-era musical with tapping, swing dancing and intricate staging.

      Nicholaw, who also directed the production, has been nominated in the category six times before, but this is his first win. In 2011, he shared the Tony for best direction of a musical with Trey Parker for “The Book of Mormon.”

      • Best Orchestrations: Charlie Rosen and Bryan Carter, “Some Like It Hot”

      Broadway World: In their visit to the press room, recently annointed Tony winners, Some Like It Hot orchestrators, Charlie Rosen and Bryan Carter discussed the timely and important subject of the need for Broadway-sized orchestras for Broadway shows.

      Bryan said, "Having an 18-piece orchestra is a luxury. We're hoping that the show inspires new companies to use large orchestras because orchestras really are the heartbeat of musical theatre."

      In discussing the challenges of bringing their larger-than-life orchestrations to life, Charlie shared, "The challenge of this show, in particular, was that I hold Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman in such high regard. They're such legends, I really thought twice, three times, four times, about every single note that I wrote on the page. I really wanted to do their score justice because they're so incredible and so prolific," Charlie added.

      • Best Scenic Design of a Play: Tim Hatley and Andrzej Goulding, “Life of Pi”

      NYTG: The Broadway transfer gave the cast and creative team the opportunity to make changes. "We were able to make some positive adjustments to the story based on the feedback from the West End," said director Max Webster, noting the first act was tightened.

      The move also gave the designers the opportunity to expand the design elements of the show. “It is always good to get the opportunity to work on a show for a second (or third, or fourth...) time,” said scenic and costume designer Tim Hatley. “In my experience designing for theatre and film over the past 30 years, I have never walked away from a production thinking I have managed to get it all right.”

      Most importantly, the design teams needed to adjust the scope and scale of the scenic design to fit the Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre in New York, which is wider and shallower than Wyndham’s. “This has, of course, had a knock-on effect, and video and lighting have had to adapt their designs to work with the new dimensions,” Hatley said.

      For his part, video designer Andrzej Goulding (co-nominated with Hatley in the scenic design category) upgraded the show’s simulations. He also worked with lighting designer Tim Lutkin to recolor some scenes for the Broadway run and blend his projections, which naturally light the set, with Lutkin's lighting of the actors. The designers also had to adjust certain visual elements to accommodate different sight lines.

      “The heart of the design is the ability to transition seamlessly from the hospital into Pi’s story, which is, for the most part, at sea,” said Hatley. The split-second transitions, which happen in full view of the audience, are integral to the narrative. “This was my challenge as the designer of the show, and I am pleased to have pulled it off.”

      • Best Scenic Design of a Musical: Beowulf Boritt, “New York, New York”
      • Best Costume Design of a Play: Brigitte Reiffenstuel, “Leopoldstadt”
      • Best Costume Design of a Musical: Gregg Barnes, “Some Like It Hot”
      • Best Sound Design of a Play: Carolyn Downing, “Life of Pi”
      • Best Sound Design of a Musical: Nevin Steinberg, “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”
      • Best Lighting Design of a Play: Tim Lutkin, “Life of Pi”
      • Best Lighting Design of a Musical: Natasha Katz, “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street”
      • Special Tony Award for Lifetime Achievement: Joel Grey and John Kander

      The actor and director Joel Grey, 91, will be honored for Lifetime Achievement at the Tony Awards this evening for his “everlasting impact” to the theater, said Heather Hitchens, president and chief executive of the American Theater Wing.

      • Isabelle Stevenson Award: Jerry Mitchell

      Parade: When Jerry Mitchell moved to New York City in 1980 to dance in his first Broadway show, Brigadoon, he'd inadvertently walked into one of the worst tragedies of American history. By 1985, he'd lost his first friend to AIDS. By 1990, he'd lost four more. As a gay dancer and choreographer performing in New York, he lived in the epicenter of the AIDS epidemic and felt helpless as his friends and colleagues died.

      That helplessness turned into action in the early '90s, after Mitchell was cast in The Will Rogers Follies, in which he was "dancing every night...practically naked" in a tribute to the Ziegfeld Follies. "I was really in great shape," he told me over coffee on a warm May afternoon in a park only a few blocks from Broadway. "I looked hot, and people were noticing...and so a friend of mine said, you should go dance at the Splash Bar on 17th St., which was this famous gay bar, and raise money for our fundraiser." The fundraiser in question was for Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, an organization founded in the theater community to fight back against the disease that ravaged their friends and loved ones.

      "A light bulb went off over my head. I called seven friends who were in Broadway shows who also, I knew, had great bodies, and I put together a strip show, a burlesque show on the bar. We made $8,000." And that was the birth of Broadway Bares.

      While Broadway Bares my have started as an eight-man strip show in a gay bar, its Chelsea nightclub days are long behind it. In total, the dancing/body-celebrating fundraiser has earned more than $22.5 million for Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, with the burlesque dancers raking in nearly $1.9 million last year alone. The charity provides lifesaving medications, health care, nutritious meals, counseling and emergency financial assistance to those in need due to HIV/AIDS and other illnesses.

      • Regional Theater Tony Award: Pasadena Playhouse

      LA Times: Pasadena Playhouse will receive the 2023 Regional Theatre Tony Award, becoming only the second Los Angeles institution to earn the honor and continuing its triumphant streak after years of turbulence.

      The prize, which includes a $25,000 grant sponsored by City National Bank, will be presented at the 76th Tony Awards on June 11 in New York.

      The Mark Taper Forum, in 1977, was the first L.A. theater to receive the Regional Theatre Tony. Other Southern California recipients include the Old Globe in 1984, South Coast Repertory in 1988 and La Jolla Playhouse in 1993.

      The award marks an astonishing turnaround for Pasadena Playhouse, which was on the verge of shutting down in 2010, when it laid off most of its staff, canceled the remainder of its season and filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection. Rescued by the generosity of donors, the theater was back on shaky ground when producing artistic director Danny Feldman was appointed to succeed long-term artistic director Sheldon Epps in 2016.

      • Tony Award for Excellence in Theater Education: Jason Zembuch Young

      Jason Zembuch Young is the artistic director of the public South Plantation High School in Plantation, Fla. He stages full-length musicals and a full-length plays in both voice and American Sign Language.

      Now, his efforts are being rewarded with a special Tony Award, granted each year in partnership with Carnegie Mellon University to a U.S. educator who has “demonstrated monumental impact on the lives of students and who embodies the highest standards of the profession.”

      • Tony Honors for Excellence in the Theater: Lisa Dawn Cave, Victoria Bailey and Robert Fried

      Broadway will have an unusually busy summer

      There usually tends to be a lull in new Broadway shows between the Tony Awards eligibility deadline in late April and the start of the school year. But this season is shaping up to be different, with seven openings between Memorial Day and Labor Day.

      The first, a horror play called “Grey House” starring Laurie Metcalf, has already opened. Jesse Green had mixed feelings about it, describing it in his review as “so expertly assembled from spare parts by the playwright Levi Holloway and the director Joe Mantello that you may not notice, between the jump scares and the shivery pauses, how little it has on its mind.”

      Up next is “Once Upon a One More Time,” about the feminist awakening of fairy tale princesses set to the music of Britney Spears. That show will be followed by two other big musicals: “Here Lies Love,” about Imelda Marcos, a former first lady of the Philippines, with a score by David Byrne and Fatboy Slim; and “Back to the Future,” adapted from the hit film.

      Broadway’s summer openings will also feature a comedian, Alex Edelman, performing his acclaimed solo show, “Just for Us,” as well as two comedic plays, “The Cottage,” which is a contemporary version of an old-school farce, and “The Shark Is Broken,” which is about the backstage chaos that challenged the making of “Jaws.”

      16 votes
    17. Do you do anything with eye-opening/thought-provoking text content?

      I found it difficult to formulate a topic for this post, but I hope that you'll all "get" what I'm talking about. You're reading something, maybe in a book, maybe an article online, maybe a...

      I found it difficult to formulate a topic for this post, but I hope that you'll all "get" what I'm talking about.

      You're reading something, maybe in a book, maybe an article online, maybe a comment on Tildes, or Reddit, or a Tweet, anything really.

      Do you do anything with it? Do you save it somehow? Do you write it out in a dedicated notebook? Do you share it? If you do, how do you share it?

      I'd love to hear about your approaches to this topic, the tools you use, what you like and don't like about your current workflows, the types of content you like to save, how you share it both with people that are close to you in real life, people who are close to you online, and maybe even strangers?

      Also, how do you use it once it all ends up wherever it ends up? Do you even use it? Or do you just like the feeling of curating your own personal archive of things you read that meant something to you at some point?

      I'll get the ball rolling:

      I've gone through a long journey with this myself, starting with bookmarking older services like Instapaper and Pinboard, trying out newer services like Readwise before eventually creating my own (totally worth all the time it took to create now that I have my own "perfect workflow" to save everything from Kindle highlights to Tildes comments!)

      I learn a lot from high quality comments online, so it's really important for me to be able to save them, however, I don't trust the built-in functions on sites like Twitter, Reddit etc. (for reasons hopefully now obvious 😅), and because I like to be able to search through them all in one place easily.

      The main reason that I refer back to them is usually because I want to share something in conversation (either in person or online), and it's nice to be able to link to the source text quickly. I also like to be able to give people a glimpse into what I'm reading on topics that are important to me, and recently I'm thinking that the best way to do this is to go back to the 90s/00s and embed RSS feeds of my saved highlights on my website, split by topic.

      I'm generally okay with the idea that I'm never going to "use" everything I save for anything particularly big or grand; it just feels nice to have a trail of text content that has been influencing my thinking over a long time period to look back on from time to time.

      17 votes
    18. Short campaign reccomendations?

      Hi, im looking for some reccomendations of short campaigns, like 3-4 months sort of thing- I'm planning to run in 5e, but im pretty open to any other systems people can recomend- what are peoples...

      Hi, im looking for some reccomendations of short campaigns, like 3-4 months sort of thing- I'm planning to run in 5e, but im pretty open to any other systems people can recomend- what are peoples faves, what are they playing through at the minute?

      7 votes
    19. The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom discussion

      Just joined this site and I wanted to make a good place to discuss the recently released: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom for the Nintendo Switch. I wanted to get your opinions, gameplay...

      Just joined this site and I wanted to make a good place to discuss the recently released: The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom for the Nintendo Switch.

      I wanted to get your opinions, gameplay videos, screenshots, or whatever it is you want to talk about in regards to the game.

      To start, did you buy the game and what's your completion / time spent playing?

      57 votes
    20. Did money buy you happiness?

      Conventional wisdom tells us money does not buy happiness, perhaps the opposite. "Studies" (don't quote me on this, just going off headlines/articles I've read) say happiness grows asymptotically...

      Conventional wisdom tells us money does not buy happiness, perhaps the opposite. "Studies" (don't quote me on this, just going off headlines/articles I've read) say happiness grows asymptotically and levels off around an income of 70k USD (perhaps more like 90k inflation adjusted?). I would be interested to know how any of this matches your personal experience. Has your happiness consistently grown with income? If so, where did that growth level off, if at all? And to what would you attribute it? better consumer goods, more security, more freedom...? Have any of you experienced a decrease in happiness associated with growing income? I eagerly await your thoughts!

      43 votes
    21. Cheese lovers: What's your go-to/favourite cheese?

      Always a tricky question, and always an interesting answer - personally my favourite cheese right now is Blacksticks Blue, a creamy blue that goes excellent melted on a pizza (subject to change at...

      Always a tricky question, and always an interesting answer - personally my favourite cheese right now is Blacksticks Blue, a creamy blue that goes excellent melted on a pizza (subject to change at a moment's notice, mind you).

      34 votes
    22. Anyone into painting (more specifically watercolors?)

      Just curious. I've been trying to understand watercolors better. What I love about watercolors: so much expression, so much freedom. It also seems like a uniquely frustrating medium; understanding...

      Just curious. I've been trying to understand watercolors better. What I love about watercolors: so much expression, so much freedom. It also seems like a uniquely frustrating medium; understanding how much water is needed, how water reacts with certain papers, different types of brushes, etc. (I should mention it's the only painting I do, so maybe this stuff isn't unique to watercolor.)

      Curious if there's any other watercolor enthusiasts here. Care to share your experiences, or tips for a novice?

      15 votes
    23. What are some fun games you can self-host?

      I have a windows server with some spare capacity that I use to host some games for the community I'm a part of. Currently I host a couple TF2 servers and a wreckfest server. What other games can I...

      I have a windows server with some spare capacity that I use to host some games for the community I'm a part of. Currently I host a couple TF2 servers and a wreckfest server. What other games can I host?

      24 votes
    24. Any homebrewers/winemakers here? If so, what have you been making recently?

      I have 3 gal of blackberry wine aging on oak cubes in a carboy right now. Relatively new to the hobby but my best so far have been elderberry wine (full bodied and tannic, kind of like a...

      I have 3 gal of blackberry wine aging on oak cubes in a carboy right now. Relatively new to the hobby but my best so far have been elderberry wine (full bodied and tannic, kind of like a Cabernet), and apple wine from store-bought juice (dry and crisp). This fall I'm planning on sourcing some locally grown Pinot Noir and trying my hand at making a "real" wine for the first time.

      15 votes
    25. Got any fun stories of when your brain miserably failed you?

      I‘m currently watching a video on Youtube and they just mentioned that famous hard-to-escape prison in the US. They just said its name and I actually know what it’s called, yet I can’t recall it...

      I‘m currently watching a video on Youtube and they just mentioned that famous hard-to-escape prison in the US. They just said its name and I actually know what it’s called, yet I can’t recall it right now. I thought of Azcaban, Alaska, Alcazar (Crying at the Disquotheque was playing along in my head aswell)…. and now as I‘m typing this, it finally came to me that the prison is called Alcatraz. When my brain came up with Alaska I actually had to laugh at what it’s coming up with while desperately trying to find the actual name. Fucking Alaska prison. And when the Harry Potter version comes to mind before the actual one, you know my priorities in life.

      Now I want to hear your stories of your brain failing you.

      21 votes
    26. Help me with flexibility

      After years and years of sitting in front of a computer I have poor hamstring flexibility. The thing is i've been lifting weights pretty regularly for at least 8 years now and have good numbers on...

      After years and years of sitting in front of a computer I have poor hamstring flexibility.

      The thing is i've been lifting weights pretty regularly for at least 8 years now and have good numbers on squat, deadlift, bench. I do a lot of romanian deadlifts and kettlebell swings.

      But these don't seem to help with sitting at 90º with my legs straight.

      I can search for flexibility routine, but the internet these days are full of ad riddled and generic content that I'm having a hard time filtering through the bullshit and finding something that says "do this 3 times per week, progress like this, etc". They just throw some stretches at you and don't say exactly how to progress and what to look for.

      It's not like lifting weights that you put more weight on the bar to quantify things easily.

      15 votes
    27. Need help solutioning Microsoft APIM

      We have a backend that kind of does REST APIs but cannot handle simple Bearer tokens for authorization and cannot produce the full set of HTTP error codes (the platform just doesn't allow, for...

      We have a backend that kind of does REST APIs but cannot handle simple Bearer tokens for authorization and cannot produce the full set of HTTP error codes (the platform just doesn't allow, for example HTTP 501 to be returned programmatically). There is no Swagger for the API.

      The thought was to use Microsoft API Management Services as a proxy of sorts. It would handle the Bearer token upfront, and then just proxy / wildcard the requests/responses to the backend. The hard part is that it needs to parse the return response, and if there is something like "{ errorCode: 501 }" property in the JSON, it needs to return HTTP 501 instead of the regular payload.

      Does anyone have any experience in setting this up? It seems like the basic policy processing won't cut it, and so function apps and logic apps seem to be the ticket. We want to keep this facade layer as thin as possible. Microsoft APIM is the only platform we're allowed to consider at this time.

      4 votes
    28. Interesting Matrix spaces?

      To be clear, Matrix as in the communication protocol. Curious if anyone has any recommendations for communities there. Personally I am mostly in the NixOS space, since that is the official chat...

      To be clear, Matrix as in the communication protocol. Curious if anyone has any recommendations for communities there. Personally I am mostly in the NixOS space, since that is the official chat for issues and questions.

      11 votes