Sony Computer Entertainment had more than one production division helping devs crank out games. One of these divisions isn't division two, or five - it's literally Division Zero, according to artist Rodney Greenblat. In his words, they "just make whatever".

Greenblat, too, just makes whatever. Sculptures, children's books, and... Dazzeloids, a sort of interactive book in the very '90s CD-ROM multimedia way. It turns out Japan really likes Dazzeloids, and Sony pulls him in on licensing projects. They jive, making t-shirts and whatnot.

At the same time, ex-pop star Masaya Matsuura is done with his pop group Psy-S and turns to multimedia projects. He starts a video game development company, NanaOn-Sha, and gets a very Mario Paint-like project Tunin'Glue on the Apple Pippin. Then he's got another crazy idea, which somehow ends up at Sony.

His wife likes Greenblat's brand of just making whatever, so she recommends Matsuura pull him in for this project. Greenblat goes to Division Zero, which looks like a secret laboratory to him. They also jive.

The team doesn't think it's going to make any money. They do anyway, and they make a little more than whatever.

PaRappa the Rapper

What is this?

Wikipedia is purporting PaRappa to be the "first" rhythm game. This seems a little off; Dance Aerobics used the NES Power Pad to hit buttons on beat, and it docked you points for missing in step, so, ehhh. I also found some other stuff - Rock'n Bark had you shooting targets to an 8-Track in the '70s, of which I cannot find a single video for the life of me. Simon may not require you to be on the beat, but rhythm is certainly at the heart of it. As we really know em, though, PaRappa certainly popularized the shit out of rhythm games as A Thing. beatmania would come about a year later.

PaRappa started off as a synthesizer/sampling program for kids, really a toy rather than a structured game, but the project shaped itself into a narrative. Even though he was "just" doing the art, Greenblat had a significant amount of creative input, as Matsuura and the team would find ways to incorporate his drawings into the story and lyrics. They asked for a karate master, he gave them a fucking onion-dude. The team loved it, so they leaned in on the whole onion thing.

From what it sounds like, the game was extremely fun to make. Everyone was focused on making the thing feel like something fresh, even if it wasn't going to sell. But it did! PaRappa was a de facto mascot for PlayStation for a while due to success in Japan. Greenblat says Sony of America never really got the game, but it got its cult following. Here we are!

Playing PaRappa, you can tell they had fun. It isn't very much, taking a step back and looking at it strictly as a game or a product - you get a call, you respond with the button presses, and it's only six stages. It's not particularly robust, and replayability is nonexistent past figuring out the system and high scoring. But christ, there is little else so willing to be itself in the medium like this with the level of risk involved with '90s video game publishing. It's bursting with untethered fun; colorful, funny, catchy, wild, and a beautiful fusion of American and Japanese pop culture. It's also ridiculously short! And that's not a bad thing, as it doesn't overstay its welcome.

What do I need to know?

I don't want to spoil much about the game itself, so I'd suggest jumping in. There's a little something extra, but it's more fun to stumble on rather than talk about.

The game is also a little harder than it looks! Since it's a pretty early rhythm game, the input timing is a bit tight. Certain versions and digital setups make that even tighter due to lag, so for those wondering how to play it, I'd suggest OG hardware or emulating the PS1 version on a setup with less lag if possible. (ie NOT your digital TV.) The PSP release is unfortunately somehow worse, and I don't believe the Remastered version didn't provide any options to adjust input lag? If you have trouble, a common suggestion is to ignore the track on-screen for timing and go with the music. Feel the rhythm! You gotta belieeeeve!

Also, funny story: this nomination was originally submitted as PaRappa the Rapper 2 under the pretense that @kfwyre thought it was a PS1 game. (Whoops! Who-whoops!) So we've got a PS2 game in here. These games are so short that I'm taking a little artistic liberty to loop in 1 as well, but let's talk about 2!

PaRappa the Rapper 2

PaRappa the Rapper 2 is more PaRappa! Call and response. Help PaRappa figure out a noodle epidemic. Get funky.

The first game is and was so wacky and new that it was a bit disappointing to some that there wasn't a big creative shift. In the interview which I'm using for a lot of history here, Greenblat - who I'm sure is biased - mentions that PaRappa 2 totally burnt him out, as a project that went through the motions when the spark wasn't quite there anymore due to production problems with Um Jammer Lammy. He says he considered himself done with the video game industry after that.

^{(Except, he forgets that he wasn't! He made Major Minor's Majestic March on the Wii, which was a collaboration with Matsuura again. It, uh, bombed. Hard. No wonder he forgot.)}

PaRappa was pushed by Sony as something that could be a flagship series. Even in the US, they did a tie-in with McDonald's for 2, and there are some Happy Meal demo discs which have a McDonald's in the beginning burger-related song. We also get a motherfuckin De La Soul tie-in music video out of it. They tried! But the niche it dug for itself just wasn't deep enough, and PaRappa's been dormant since 2002.

That all said - aside from one recent particular critical review about the lack of creativity, I see VERY little opposition in retrospectives about 2, and I'm excited to play it myself. If you like 1, and you want more, then spin 2! It tightens the system up - better timing, lines change on multiple playthroughs to add some replay to the linear structure, and there's a multiplayer mode. Also, the SOUNDTRACK! unga bunga. The original is great, mind you, but it's very colorful, bouncy, MIDI stuff. These backup tracks in 2 are some crazy acid jazz shit.

Anything else?

Oh, yeah. Multiplayer! For this month's extra credit, we're totally gonna do a rap battle tournament. Ping me in the comments if you want to join in! I'll try to figure out a date and a quick tutorial to set it up. We'll all need to figure out PCSX2 netplay to make it work, but like, we can't not do this. I hear the multiplayer is totally, wonderfully, bullshit.

_{...Also I had to put this somewhere - Greenblat casually put a fucking sheep giving birth in Dazzeloids, which seems to be a core memory for a few people in the comments. Thanks, Rodney.}

You know those carnival games with a metal stick? And you have to get it to the other side of a maze without touching anything?

No? Okay, maybe you've played The Impossible Game on Newgrounds like two decades ago? albinoblacksheep? Ebaums? Kids these days.

Operation! Like, the board game. But a maze.

Yeah.

Irritating Stick

What is this?

You have a time limit to get to the end of a maze, only using your directional input. This is supposedly based on a particular game show, so there are plenty of wacky obstacles and an announcer eggs you on. If you touch the side or an obstacle, your controller jumpscares the living shit out of you with max vibration.

You may be wondering why this is a game. But if you've ever played a precision platformer, or threaded needles, or done anything which required precise hand-eye coordination and you keep fucking up but by the grace of your cramping flexor pollicis brevis you are GOING TO DO THIS , this is about as distilled as it gets. You're either going to hate this, or you're going to get obsessed with it and you're going to hate this.

I know who you are. We're gonna have f u n . Also, potentially, RSI. Stretch and take breaks!

What do I need to know?

There's a speed changing mechanic, so you won't be entirely lost without an analog stick. But, friends, use a controller. Don't hurt yourself.

The announcer straight-up catcalls you in the Japanese version, and isn't much better in the American one. So if he's annoying the piss out of you, you can turn it off in the options.

Anything else?

@kfwyre is a sadist.

PEPSIMAAAAAAAAAN!

What is this?

DUN! DUNNNN DADA DUN! DUNNNN DADA

What do I need to kn-

PEPSIMAAAAAAAAAN!

[trumpets blaring]

...Anything else?

Alright, alright. This is Pepsiman. It's a 3D runner, in the vein of Temple Runner and Subway Surfers. But Pepsi.

Aaand that's all you should really know before you start this, for full effect. Really, I think the trivia behind it is about as effective as any actual history:

• It's definitely not the first runner game, as there were a decent number of 2D examples and some Mode 7-style examples on the Genesis and SNES. But Pepsiman might just be the first full-3D runner..?

• You had to pay for this! It's no Chex Quest. Thankfully it wasn't full price; looking around, I saw a 2800¥ label on a wrapped copy from ebay? But still, it's like a $20 USD advertisement, in 1999-bux...

• Despite being in full English VA, and despite featuring an American actor in the FMV, this had no Western release. It's Japan-only.

• That actor is Mike Butters! He leans into having done this on his Twitter, and he showed up in the Angry Video Game Nerd video on Pepsiman, joking that he doesn't remember the shoot. He's also the dude from the razor wire scene in Saw, if you, uh, somehow recognize him in that state.

• What a coincide that we're talking about death game scenarios ran by megalomaniacal killers, because - hey, don't you fucking leave - this was Zero Escape writer Kotaro Uchikoshi's first game! Pepsiman developed and published by KID, where he would eventually work on the Out of the Infinity series, but his first job was 3D modeling for this. For the fences and garbage cans and whatnot, though, not anything particularly important. This year he egged Pepsi to get the band back together.

• The talking guy in the first 3D cutscene is Dr. Light. Like, that Dr. Light.

• The game is fairly hard! If you do ollie outie, check out the legendary GDQ 2016 run for maximum APM.

• Alternatively, turn RTX ON.

DRINK! SCCCHHHHLLLLUP

Of course, the game was being developed by - who else? - NanaOn-Sha. Fortunately for us, free of advertisement tethers, Masaya Matsuura took the concept and started cooking again.

Vib-Ribbon

What is this?

Instead of an unstable subcompact, Vib-Ribbon has you pilot a rabbit, named Vibri, walking through stages set to music. You press buttons to obstacles in the ground as you walk along. That's it!

The game is heavily stylized, and the graphics are all pseudo-vector lines in an extremely minimalist style. It only contains a few songs by indietronica pop group Laugh & Peace. The engine is so small, in fact, that the game runs entirely in the RAM without reading from the disc.

Why? Because you can load your own music! Throw in a CD and Vib-Ribbon will generate a course to anything you put in. Supposedly it was geared towards pop, if that helps you think of something you'd want to play. (Or, exactly what we shouldn't play...)

What do I need to know?

How to load CDs! If you're emulating, what you'll want to do is find an audio program which is capable of turning a list of MP3s into a cue format. I believe foobar is able to, but I found this utility that may be easier to use. Let us know in the comments if you have any problems.

Also, there wasn't a US release! They figured it wouldn't do well.

Anything else?

Not really! It's very straightforward, go try some tracks. But if you want a little trivia, Vibri showed up in one of the Astro Bot games. Also, Vib-Ribbon is in the MoMA's video game collection, between The Sims and (fittingly?) the Nokia Brick version of Snake.

You ever have a bad day? THINK AGAIN.

I don't have much of a snappy intro here, because I don't think I could possibly add any spice to go along with what's already in Incredible Crisis.

Incredible Crisis

What is this?

It's about a family dealing with an incredible crisis!

...Yeah?

Okay, it's a series of incredible arcade-style minigames. About... a family, dealing with an incredible crisis. It's incredibly Japanese. Also, it's all set to ska. Incredible ska.

Like much in this collection, the less said before you dive in the better.

What do I need to know?

The Japanese relase had two extra games taken out from the Western release: a very Parappa-y karaoke game (too hard to localize to new music) and a quiz game (incredibly Japanese, reliant on kanji). Honestly you take a look at this game and it's a wonder it made it over here at all. There's a particular minigame that has a completely unbeatable pattern in the original release, so just stick with the Western release.

Enjoy the ride! The best analogue I can think of is Feel the Magic XY/XX on the DS, where it's throwing you into random shit and you go along with it the best you can.

Oh, also, speaking of minigames with erotic themes, I saw a suggestion - when you get to the ferris wheel and the married man starts giving the sexy lady a """"back massage"""", for the love of god put headphones in.

Again - I have no idea how this made it over here.

Anything else?

There are a couple Takayuki Watanabes on MobyGames; the only other game that the Incredible Crisis director is credited to is the PS1 game Vs. (which is an insanely un-searchable title on YouTube). It's odd, because that's a version of the Japanese game Fighters' Impact specifically rewrapped for Western release. The primary designer for the game, though - Kenichi Nishi - has an incredibly ecclectic rap sheet: Chrono Trigger, Super Mario RPG, Moon, L.O.L.: Lack of Love, Chibi-Robo, and... This.