What are you reading these days?
What are you reading currently? Fiction or non-fiction or poetry, any genre, any language! Tell us what you're reading, and talk about it a bit.
What are you reading currently? Fiction or non-fiction or poetry, any genre, any language! Tell us what you're reading, and talk about it a bit.
We had a fun thread last year about what came to mind when other people's usernames come up.
It ended up turning into a cool little online intro of the history of your username, if you have one. There are so many usernames I don't recognise now that I'm back with a steady internet connection after a long time away.
Mine is boring sorry - I switch usernames every 12 months or so for the illusion of control regarding anonymity. My main username used to be Iain M. Banks' Culture series related, so I do miss meeting fellow Culture fans, but this year it's just from a random number generator.
Does your username have an interesting backstory? I recently learned that @chocobean wasn't a chocolate bean, and @cfabbro wasn't a Computational Fabrication Bro, I'm sure there are plenty of others out there.
I've been thinking about this over the past few weeks after chatting with some of my friends about this.
For some framing:
I grew up with my parents not encouraging me to learn to cook and my Mom actively refusing to have myself or my brother in the kitchen because we always "made a mess". Before I moved out to university I'd only ever cooked a couple of meals beyond warming things up or instant ramen + grilling meat. I also learned how to carve a turkey/bird because that would be expected of me at a family gathering later on. At university we had the mandatory freshman meal plan my first year and I lived in my fraternity for three years where we had a cook at our house when school was in session.
It wasn't until I moved in with my girlfriend, now wife, where I started cooking. Learning from either recipes, or watching my wife cook things and asking her how she prepared a dish so I could try to make it. Nowadays I like cooking breakfast foods especially on the weekend when I don't have to get my oldest off to school and have more time since my wife doesn't like to wake up early.
When chatting with my guy friends who are around my age (late 20s/early 30s) I've found a lot of them don't cook much or say they don't know how. Many of them eat out regularly/order delivery or buy instant meals.
Knowing my parents, if I had had a sister growing up she would have been encouraged to learn to cook unlike my brother and I. My wife and her siblings all learned through helping my mother in law prepare food in the kitchen.
This got me curious for a wider perspective on this from other men:
Do you "know" how to cook or are you comfortable cooking for yourself, for others?
Were you encouraged to learn how to cook growing up or did you learn as an adult?
Do you have any favorite or signature dishes you prepare?
For example, last night I had some bagels and coffee, went to the gym, and had some oranges at home. I felt perfectly full and didn't need to eat, but even on melatonin my brain wouldn't let me sleep, even until 2am, until I broke down and fried something on the stove so I got the worst outcome in terms of diet. My subconscious is implacably against any kind of change or improvement and insists I need to compensate for any exercise whatsoever by eating more, even though frankly fifteen minutes on a treadmill and fifteen doing leg presses and biceps were unlikely to have burned more than a potato's worth of calories.
They beat Pittsburgh Penguins 7-1 on Monday and Boston Bruins 7-2 tonight.
Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like infowars, selfhosted and groups. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was pondering.
But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat
stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!
I've been researching internet privacy and fell down the rabbit hole of...well, internet privacy. I started with deleting Facebook/Instagram and switching to fire fox + plugins. I would like to make more improvements but I really have no idea how, it started with deleting socials and next thing you know I'm looking at LineageOS and de-googling.
If anyone has any suggestions on where to go next while staying realistic/not going crazy, i would love to hear them. I am not really sure where to set my expectations, basically I would like to have more control of my data. The other day Google photos gave me a memory recap which kind of creeped me out! I am suddenly not fond of whatever is going on under the surface of Google photos that's making collages and trying to sell my photo books. Also g-board giving me a pop up in the text prediction row asking me to rate the app??? Ew.
I am a fan of self hosting and run a small NAS (open media vault) but this too quickly turns into the privacy spiral and leaves me thinking I should throw my phone into a river and live in the forest. Would love to hear your thoughts/advice/opinions!
What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?
Most of my family members (notably everyone in the older generation) are variously xenophobic (very), transphobic (plenty) and racist (enough). They're openly right wing populist party voters. In family gatherings, or even in online messaging, I normally ignore them or try to divert the conversation away from their stupid political takes - even the ones who know I am pansexual are likely to say some nasty shit, showing (I believe) that they don't have a drop of respect for me or my gay brother. There is nothing I can ever convince them of, political or not, because (I believe) they will always treat my arguments with disdain, regardless of any reason or evidence. I don't think much better of their politics myself, since I find most of their constant complaining about entire classes of people they've never even interacted with incredibly tiresome, not to mention wholly inconsistent with their supposed christian values (I know, this situation sounds very american, even though I am not.)
I personally believe there is some value in some, but not all, arguments that are for restricting or reorganizing immigration at this time, mainly due to problems stemming from years of lazy policymaking, and in some right wing fiscal policy (we have some extremely expensive and inefficient government programmes right now - NOT health or education - and misguided protectionism of certain huge and mismanaged private companies), so we can usually meet on that common ground.
Today at a gathering an aunt decided out of the blue to loudly proclaim how happy she was that Donald Trump was elected in the US. Other relatives quickly agreed, after which they started a conversation about how a Trump presidency will be good for the economy. At this point I will just politely say I didn't understand what they were talking about (my thoughts weren't as kind at the time); we are not americans, and I have the notion that Trump is an isolationist who admires dictators and despises the EU and doesn't value us as allies; I am led to believe he wants to do things with regard to defense, tariffs, etc. that are unambiguously bad for us and will directly translate into a harder life and more danger for Europeans over the next few years.
A younger relative then said he was happy that we finally had "an insane dictator" on "our side". According to him, none of the crazy authoritarians in the world respected a man like Biden, but they were wary of Trump, since Trump is unpredictable. I remember hearing this argument eight years ago, but I'm not so sure of this. Historically, as I said, Trump seems to me to fawn over strongmen and demagogues leading other nations, while he hasn't exactly conveyed that he is "on our side". As far as I know, he's been suspiciously an enabler of Vladimir Putin, for instance.
So at this point I explained to my family that we weren't there to discuss politics and the politics conversation was to end immediately or I was going to start insulting people.
I'd like you all to tell me if I'm in the wrong here. Am I out of touch? Can you explain my family's perspective to me in a way that makes them sound less insane? This isn't some kind of bait. Just because I don't like Donald Trump (and neither do the majority of people in this community, AFAIK), I pride myself in being a fairly rational person. I can be convinced of things, as long as there's rationally constructed argument underpinning them. Maybe there's some value to their position?
Hey Tildes,
Recently I picked up WoW again and I've felt a rush and focus I haven't felt for a while. I can play the game for an entire day. I feel nothing but guilt doing so. The one thing that gives me joy feels like something I'm not allowed to do at this stage of my life; I'm 35.
I'm in grouptherapy until march next year but I feel I'm not making any sensible progress. Others around me seem to open and loosen up, finding tangible changes that help their lives. Meanwhile I just keep resenting myself, dread doing anything that might even cost effort.
I feel I'm a fraud, a selfless good-for-nothing profiteer who blames anything but me. It fuels my self-hatred and my wish to self-isolate and act in self-destructive behavior. I also notice a growing bitterness as I get older.
Have you watched any movies recently you want to discuss? Any films you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.
Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.
I often tell myself that I'm "already dead". I lost my ego long ago and I often don't mind looking dumb or making mistakes, because at the end of the day, why does it matter? We're all going to die and my existence will not change the earth's future.
Thinking this way has GREATLY helped me look forward to the future and reach true happiness. It feels like whatever happens, I've already reached rock bottom so I can only go ahead.
Having said that, ever since 2016, every year has been better than the last. I now have a good fulfilling career, I have a very good group of friends, I'm good financially and I have all the freedom in the world.
Why do I live? I live for experiences, I live to create memories, I live to explore, I live to create, I live to better myself.
So, what are your reasons? I'm always curious about other people's life stories.
Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.
Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.
Every time I find myself in an ADHD related thread on the internets, I feel like I'm seeing my personal struggles being described by others (Anxiety, Depression, executive function issues... the list goes on).
My intermittent attempts to seek out a diagnosis (or rule it out) end quickly with all the utter shite noise in the search results (literally everyone is selling something).
I'm hoping some of you who've been down this road can shed some light. Should I just schedule and appointment with my GP and start a conversation or???
Thanks (hope I got this in the right sub-tilde)
Post your current bingo cards.
Continue updating us on your games!
If you did not participate in Week 1 but want to start this week, that's fine!
Reminder: playing bingo is OPTIONAL.
Quick links:
14 participants played 13 bingo cards and moved 36 games out of their backlogs!
There were 0 bingo wins.
Thus far, a total of 53 games have been played for the November 2024 Backlog Burner.
Week 2 Game List:
11 participants played 10 bingo cards and moved 17 games out of their backlogs!
There were 0 bingo wins.
Game list:
I thought I would share my thoughts and experiences daily driving Linux (Fedora KDE Plasma) for the past week.
My plan was to switch to Linux once Windows 10 hit EoL in Fall 2025. This was due to my computer not supporting Windows 11. This past September, my computer broke (probably MoBo), and so I swapped out my CPU and MoBo, which probably can support Windows 11. However, this hardware swap unactivated my Windows, Microsoft support was not helpful, and I am not a fan of the direction Windows is heading in (removing local accounts, Recall, and a general vibe I get from Microsoft of removing control from end users). So, I decided to make the jump to Linux a year sooner than expected.
So I would say I am moderately experienced with Linux before this. Personally, I have setup a Proxmox server, in which I setup an openmediavault NAS, and played around with various desktop distros for personal curiosity. I also switched my old laptop over to Linux a few years back, but had very low requirements of the tasks that laptop had to perform. I also took a post secondary class on Linux, primarily covering system administration tasks like BASH/PERL scripting, Apache server admin, LDAP, and file sharing all using Ubuntu. So going into this I had a moderate amount of experience, all within Debian based distros. The bigger change with switching my desktop is that it is my primary computer, so the expectations of what it needed to run was higher.
I did a post about a month ago asking for recommendations to look into: https://tildes.net/~tech/1ji6/switching_to_linux_looking_for_distro_recommendations
I settled on Fedora KDE Plasma for a few reasons:
Some of these are ongoing, while others were issues that I have worked through
systemctl restart --user plasma-plasmashell
which drastically improves the situation, but the glitches are still partially there. This has just started last night, so probably a computer restart may solve the problem, but I am trying to avoid having to constantly restart the computer.I have been primarily using Flatpaks to install applications. Overall it has been a smooth process. One pain point I have is it seems that the Minecraft Official Launcher for non-Debian systems is kind of clunky requiring me to login to my Microsoft account every time I open the game. This will probably be solved by switching to a third party launcher in the near future. The one software that I haven't gotten around to installing yet is DaVinci Resolve.
There are a few things that have been a pleasant surprise:
Overall I have quite enjoyed running Linux. It does require some tinkering as glitches appear, which currently I am fine with. If I had less free time to tinker and solve the issues, I would probably find Linux to be less viable and more frustrating. Also, most of my glitches can be solved by restarting the computer, although I am trying to find solutions that do not require that. I find it allows me to use the computer and change it to how I want it to be, which I have felt like Windows has gotten increasingly hostile towards the user. A good comparison on this is how the default applications that KDE has included are easy to remove, whereas Windows used to (not sure if it still does) reinstall Microsoft Teams when you uninstalled it.
What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.
If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!
Post your current bingo cards.
Continue updating us on your games!
If you did not participate in Week 1 but want to start this week, that's fine!
Reminder: playing bingo is OPTIONAL.
Quick links:
11 participants played 10 bingo cards and moved 17 games out of their backlogs!
There were 0 bingo wins.
Game list:
This is a monthly thread for those who need it. Vent, share your experiences, ask for advice, talk about how you are doing. Let's make this a compassionate space for all who may need one.
Enshittificiation, or in my own words, "how everything starts to suck on purpose", has somewhat come to rule my life, and thus, ruin my life.
An example I'm thinking about right now is socks. I bought a certain pair of socks probably ten years ago now. I liked them and took for granted that I would be able to purchase this sock or type of sock at any given time. Fast-forward ten years, and the sock is gone. And it feels like no other sock compares.
What's really going on in my mind is, "I know there is better out there, and this is just a choice of the manufacturer to be greedy". Except in this circumstance, the "there" is my fantasy land of the past.
So I ask you all, how do you move on from this? Because what happens for me is I just don't buy new socks, and instead hold on to my tatters (most of them still work decently, but nowhere near as well as they used to). I have tried randomly buying socks to get over my fear of failure (choosing the wrong socks and wasting money and contributing to global waste and contributing to materialism and general clutter in my house, etc.); But this just furthers the issue because I confirm that the other socks are shit and this seems like a fruitless endeavor, as such, in addition to going against my morals and values I listed above.
Thank you for any advice or help!
*EDIT
Thank you all for a rousing discussion, as usual.
Here are some of my Major Takeaways:
Lastly, one clarification, I'd like to add that on the subject of clothing or other comforts in particular, it is extra painful to lose something you love, like a clothing item, when you are not an "average" person. Sensory issues, body shapes, and fashion tastes can be so limiting when you are not within the bell curve, and so it is not a trivial subject to mourn the loss of something you once had, and fear that you will never find something like it again.
Add awesome game deals to this topic as they come up over the course of the week!
Alternately, ask about a given game deal if you want the community’s opinions: e.g. “What games from this bundle are most worth my attention?”
Rules:
If posting a sale, it is strongly encouraged that you share why you think the available game/games are worthwhile.
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So I've watched this If Neurodivergents Conducted Job Interviews Like Neurotypicals and one thing struck me as odd. Is it not like normal when somebody tells you they've been sick recently for you to share your own experience with similar condition?
I do have ADHD and automatically share when this exact situation comes up, but is this like a no-no among neurotypical folks?