Seeking recommendations for Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) apps for a bi gal like myself for cute dates with other women only?

So far most of what I've tried have been very limited/one way interactions (unsure if people have forgotten how to ask questions!?). ONLY SEEKING FOR SELF, NO UNICORNS/NOT A UNICORN. Sorry just had to make that clear....

Any recommendations would be appreciated! PS am Au based not USA...

My husband and I have a bachelor party weekend coming up for two of our friends (they’re a gay couple). Rather than having the kind of raucous, adult adventure that people commonly associate with “bachelor party”, we’re looking for more wholesome, nerdy stuff.

For example: we’ve already got an escape room lined up, and I’ll be bringing the full set of Jackbox games. What I’m looking for is other recommendations for party games and activities, especially ones that work with people who aren’t super familiar with one another. Everyone there will know the grooms, but we don’t all know each other.

Also, games/activities should be relatively simple to learn and play. There will be drinking.

Recommendations don’t have to be entirely clean or family-friendly by the way (we’re not opposed to something like Cards Against Humanity, for example), but we’re not a group that likes particularly raunchy stuff.

Anyone have any ideas for a cool project involving an old school satellite dish? It's maybe 6-8 feet in diameter. I've seen some stuff like make an art project or an umbrella but I was hoping to use it for picking up signals again. I don't imagine I can use it to get TV but is there any satellites from universities or maybe hobby cube sats that I might be able to use?

Apologies if this is in the wrong topic it was this or ~space.

It took me a while to find a good, non-destructive way to put up posters in my living room. I think I started with blu-tack, which dried in a few months and the posters came down. Then I tried 3M's hanging strips, which stayed on the wall for longer, but was pretty expensive for what it was. A year ago I had the idea of using velcro that has adhesive tape on the other side. So far this has worked near perfectly for me.

I know I'm not breaking new ground here, but I was happy to finally find a decent solution. Well, at least for light objects on walls (and elsewhere).

I am a huge fan of Prana pants, they are made of synthetic materials, stretchy and comfortable, light and dry quickly, and I have found them perfect for travel, hiking, lounging, etc.

Unfortunately they have discontinued my favorite models that looked more “professional” like chinos and thus could double for work, travel, date nights, etc. Their current models, while comfortable, all sort of look like hiking pants and don’t have an aesthetic I appreciate.

With that in mind, I was curious if anyone could provide me with recommendations for professional looking pants with similar attributes as those above that you’ve found to be comfortable and multi purpose. Thank you!

My girlfriend and I have been in the market for new computer chairs at home, as we have been getting increasingly uncomfortable in our existing chairs. We are both shorter people (both under 5’5”) and the problem we’ve been coming across is in most chairs (even the ones I’ve found for “short” people) tend to have seat depths of 16+ inches. What ends up happening is the edge of the seat ends up pushing into our calves leading to bad posture because we can’t sit up fully to the back of the chair unless our lower back gets leaned forward a bit due to the size of the seat depth. This leads to bad posture and back pain.

So I’m curious fellow short people of Tildes, does anyone have any recommendations for a more comfortable and ergonomic chair for short people?

I’m going to be replacing my mattress soon, and there are a lot more options available now, including many that I can order online instead of having to go get from a furniture store. Every time I’ve tried ones out in the store it’s always been a crapshoot as to whether or not I actually like it once I get it home, as I can’t really get a good feel for it there. As such I’m more than willing to go with the convenience of an online brand, but would rather hear from some people besides sponsored YouTubers first.

What brand of mattress do you sleep on and like? Any brands you had bad experiences with and would avoid?

I work from home 5 days a week and have done for years with the same chair (it’s nothing fancy). After a couple of hectic days at work this week I’ve found my back hurting. I’ve never had this issue before as I usually take pretty regular breaks.

I’ve been toying with the idea of a sit stand desk so when I’m busy I can still take a break from sitting.

Does anyone else have experience and insight into the pros and cons?

Thanks

I'm a fairly tall person and my partner and I both really love large blankets. However, I'm not a big fan of the thin/plush style often sold at stores like Walmart. Does anyone have large, thick/quality blanket recommendations?

I've looked at BigBlanketCo but their blankets seem to be somewhat overpriced and underwhelming.

I'm finally ready to sacrifice my self esteem and faith in humanity at the altar of dating apps. My question for those of you with more experience with them is this - do different apps attract noticeably different pools of users? What have you noticed comparing the populations on different apps? Which wound up working best for you, if any of them did?

Any that had particular features that bothered you? I've been using Hinge for like a day and already discovered they have a separate queue for your best matches that they demand a premium currency to message :/

I'm a pretty conscientious person and I like to research stuff before I buy it - I'm not obsessive about getting The Best Whatever In Class, but like anyone I'm interested in a good deal for a product that suits my needs.

Between the prevalence of review-stuffing bots, Google's results getting worse, and reviewers themselves sometimes having questionable financial backing, I'm finding it harder and harder to find reliable information. So the gold standard is personal recommendations from real people!

I checked and it's been a while since we've had a general recommendations thread on Tildes so I thought it might be nice to start up another one with the influx of new folks!

Possible points of discussion:

1. Are you looking to buy something and hoping to hear from people about what's good and what's bad? Post the type of thing you're looking for in a top-level comment and others can chime in!

2. Is there a product you enjoy or that has improved your life, fills a niche or special requirement really well, or stands out to you as being a big improvement over its competitors? Is there a particular company you had a great experience with? Share with others who might also benefit!

3. Is there a product you tried, HATED, and want to warn people about? Something that's all hype, no substance? I think that also fits here.

4. Are there any reviewers or sites you trust in particular?

and a good japanese futon mattress as well.

i'm moving from a house into an apartment and am scaling my life down significantly. this seems a pretty good option... but unfortunately i don't know a whole lot about either of these (yet) so i'm looking for some guidance.

thanks!

Hi all. I'm planning on proposing to my girlfriend this year. I'm looking for a place to buy a simple/dainty moissanite or lab-grown diamond ring, preferably from an ethical seller with a good return policy. Does anyone have any recommendations?

After several years, my current pair of shoes has finally fallen apart. I don't need to look cool, or any other bells and whistles. I am looking for a simple pair of men's shoes. I want something that preferably doesn't use sweat shops.

Any suggestions?

I'm relocating soon and trying to find the right spot for me. I don't want this to be an individual recommendation thread though. Instead, just tell me about your favorite urban neighborhoods — what you love about them, what isn't so great, and what makes them stand out from the rest.

I think many of us are students, or just like self-learning some topics for themselves, perhaps their work requires studying — I think it might be interesting to collect a few tips we have experience with on how to do it efficiently.

I would start with probably one of the best tools in this category that I think are still underutilized by many: spaced-repetition software. Perhaps more people might be familiar with the concept from language learning with word cards, but the base idea is that reinforcing some knowledge at increasing intervals will effectively make you remember it ’forever’. A final selling point on this topic: it only requires 10 minutes out of your entire life to remember a fact for basically forever with instant recall - that’s a very good use of one’s time in my opinion. For more information on it here is a great article.
(It’s talking about Anki, a notable spaced repetition program that is free and open-source (the ios client is paid though, as this is the only income source of the maintainer, but you could just use the web interface as well. Not affiliated))

My wife and I are hopefully 4-5 years away from being able to build a house. We frequently have this exchange:

"I definitely want <<feature>> in <<room>>!"
— "You should write that down!"
No one writes anything down

Has anyone used a tool or methodology you liked for a sort of vision board? I've used some basic ones that let you have text nodes (Bathroom ⟩ Shower ⟩ needs recirculation pump), but many ideas are in the form of photos or links that wouldn't be as useful without seeing them.

I'm a software engineer, so I was thinking of trying something like Trello, which is really more for project management but I think could be shoehorned into what I want.

Hey all! Most clothing and fashion brands that you can find in your local shops or online are fast-fashion: cheap to produce in mass quantities, using cheap materials and don’t last very long. For example, I currently buy my t-shirts from Banana Republic Factory for around $10-$15 and they last maybe 8-12 months before they shrink in the wash or discolor.

I’m looking for some alternatives! I’m okay paying a little bit more for stuff that’s going to last a long time. Open to any suggestions for a more sustainable, long-lasting wardrobe!

It's six months and I haven't spent it yet.

What do I need that I don't realize I need?

I already have multiple monitors, keyboards, etc. Separate headphones (that I don't use because I don't need to shut the door often), microphone (doesn't make a difference), and other obvious tech toys. I bought a new UPS right before I started the job.

It's a nice problem to have: "I don't need anything." But surely I should spend money on SOMEthing?

Where do you go for decent reviews? Context-i was looking for a site to find good popcorn, and all the results on google for as far as i cared to scroll were fluff (pun intended).

Here’s what i use:

Rtings for stereo.

Wirecutter for appliances.

Reddit for everything else.

And my results are quite mixed, and involve a lot of scrolling.

Where do yall go?

Hi all,

Yesterday I got the good news from my work that my remote work assignment is now permanent and I am free to live and work anywhere in the US. I get to keep my salary so really any place is on the table for me and I wanted to get some feedback and advice from those who live or have lived across the US.

While I would personally be content moving to the middle of nowhere, my partner has been aching to get out of the suburbs of the Bay area and be around more people and things to do that wouldn't require her to drive places. Personally, I'm looking to take my rent price down to a maximum of ~$2100 per month for a 2 bedroom that will give us enough space to each do our remote work. Some places that I have been looking at are:

• San Diego, CA - not so affordable but has great dog beaches and vibrant downtown
• Chattanooga, TN - affordable but small for my partner and lacks the restaurant variety we have grown accustomed to in CA. Knoxville, TN may be a runner up.
• Kansas City, MO - I have nephews that I have neglected being a part of their life and this would put me within 30 minutes of being close to them. Apartments are dirt cheap in downtown.
• Richmond, VA - closer to my parents but haven't looked too into this. I grew up on the complete other side of VA but am willing to come back to the state .
• Chicago, IL - this place is massive and I have no idea what are the best places in the city to live vs. what to avoid. I have always heard Chicago is underrated and I'm not opposed to the cold. I like that they have tons to do but it isn't really close to family as I would like to be.

Anyways, I'm open to hearing about some underrated places and putting some time into researching them. Walkability and things to do are critical in selling the city to my partner who really doesn't want to drive to do anything.

I already have 3 dogs. I have nothing against cats, but it would probably be a challenge to the pack. I can't say I care much for reptiles. Hamsters are an option. Had Guinea pigs but found them high maintenance.

Occasionally people here get into discussions about social relationships, namely dating, and what quickly comes up is how both of those seem to be less common and harder to 'get'. This more frequently happens in overtly dating and relationship subreddits and similar dedicated spaces, albeit, of course, this also pops up in more general communities, alongside any community where social relationships are an important topic, like communities about social ideologies like feminism or the manosphere or about genders because heterosexuality.

One thing I often find is missing is some historical context. A lot of talk about loneliness and lack of platonic or romantic relationships is basically limited to the recent past, if it even talks about the past at all. It seems like it would be helpful to look at what relationships and dating were like 10, 20, 30 years ago when it comes to talking about the problems or just general state of both today. So do you know of good sources of information concerning relationships in the past? If so, then why do you think they don't pop up in discussions about dating?

The last time I posted on tildes, I got some really helpful suggestions on a mop for my floors. Now I'm looking for a new high chair for my daughter. She's nearly 6 months old, so we're about to start her on solid foods but gave away our older son's high chair a while back when he started sitting in a regular chair (and because it was terrible).

The main requirement is that it's easy to clean, but it also has to support a younger baby sitting in one for the first time. Our last high chair (Graco brand) almost seemed like it was designed to have as many difficult-to-reach crevices as possible where crumbs could get pulverized into.

What do you think?

The recent rise in hate crimes against Asian Americans has been an emotional topic for me. The thing that makes me sad is, it seems the most I can do to de-escalate a violent situation I see on the news without putting myself in clear danger is to basically distract the aggressor from afar and comfort the victim afterwards.

What makes the matter more complicated is, if you look at the demographics of those who tend to commit these violent crimes against Asian people, they're often other minorities. It's so easy to fall into a trap of undermining the progress we've made in racial/social equality the moment we acknowledge that Asians are being targeted. For similar reasons, I view that our political system is entirely ill-equipped to handle this matter in a sustainable matter.

But I'd still like to turn this into something positive. Because I live comfortably as an engineer in the Bay Area, I was thinking I can donate to charities and organizations that are effective at bringing an end to this violence every time I see news about an Asian American getting targeted on social media. I plan on doing my own research as well, but I hope you can also give some suggestions.

I've been thinking a bit lately of starting to look for another place of work. Nothing is really bad at my current employer, but I've been there since 2017 and my feet are starting to itch a bit. In addition, I'm not really to engaged in my work at the moment since I feel the domain is fairly boring and the tech is rather mundane. This might be a reflection of my sentiment of IT industry in general, i.e. lots of toys but mainly they are just different flavours of the same thing (especially when it comes to building XYZ web app).

Formerly my approach to finding a new job has been to look for companies that are looking for people with skills in technologies I am interested in learning. However, since I'm a bit dissilousioned with tech I think I need to switch my approach and look more for a mission driven organisation I can get behind!

What are your thoughts on organsations that do some kind of important work? If you were to pick a top 3 organisations where you would work which ones would you pick?

Note they don't have to be tech focused. I'm generally curious about different organisations I should look into and also to hear your thoughts on the matter!

I got a cheap mop at the grocery store last year thinking that would be enough, but it broke like a month ago and always left smudges all over my floors anyway. I never really liked it. It was one of those fixed sponges with a handle to squeeze it out rather than one that looks like Medusa.

I have wood laminate floors throughout my house, not true wood floors. Unfortunately, they're dark brown and show a ton of crumbs and smudges, so I'm looking for something sorta in the buy-it-for-life category. I.e. willing to shell out a little more if it makes a difference. I've had a vacuum for a year that has been good for all the crumbs (Miele), and I really love it.

Also what soap should I be using for best results?

Thanks, all!

Hey folks,

since I'm completely out of the loop regarding trends but totally interested in being a 'cool uncle', I am asking you (maybe people having kids around this age) for help!

What is a 'good' present for a 15 year old girl?

I don't know much about her interests or activities and since she is quite new to the family, I haven't had the chance to talk to her.

Is there anything 'universal' today that might work? 😅

Thanks for your thoughts and discussion.

With the need for social distancing and self-isolation and #Stay(ing)TheFuckHome becoming near global realities, it is looking like many of us, and nearly everyone we know, will be spending large amounts of time staying in. I like this guide (thanks again, @aphoenix!), which ends with "Treat quarantine as an opportunity to do some of those things you never usually have time for."

Certainly we all have things in our life like that, but I also think it would be neat to try to brainstorm a list of things people can do for new experiences -- things they might not think to do or know are available to them. Everybody knows we can catch up on Netflix and our unread pile of books, but what else is out there? What can I do when I need a change of pace? What novel things can people do from home/online that don't require them to go out for resources/supplies?

Spouse and I were on a weekend drive-and-walkaround today, and discussing ways to save money on house renovations. We've kept running into things like, "yeah, two arthritic 50-somethings are really going to DIY sheetrocking a ceiling...nope."

I'm guessing nearly all Tilders have gone through times when they didn't have much, if any, disposable income, or had to squeeze budgets to save for big expenses.

So what do you enjoy doing for entertainment that costs little or nothing beyond what you'd ordinarily spend for basic living expenses?

I know we used to do things like gathering people for potluck, cheap jug wine, and chatter, but we're still building a circle of friends and acquaintances, and don't have space for entertaining yet! Walks in the woods, reading, volunteering, and watching movies, are pretty much givens, but happy to hear your thoughts.

This is a bit of a sibling topic to the one about changing habits for 2020. Rather than looking at habits specifically, I want to look at "swaps" that people can make.

What's something someone could change out for a better alternative?

A swap should be recommended if it is,

• more ethical,
• more sustainable,
• heathier,
• or just overall better in an individual or collective way.

Importantly: the swap should be both feasible and sensical, and should be something that is relatively easy to do. This isn't about making huge lifestyle changes but about taking what we're already doing and making it better.

Please give your reasoning for your swap, as well as any important caveats. Mentioning specific brands/companies is fine if that's an important part of the swap. Also, swaps can be for anything so don't feel limited to consumer products. Feel free to give good food/service/app/software/store swaps as well!

See my post below for an example, if the setup I've given here is unclear!

Given the ambiguity of the term "lifehack", feel free to contribute anything that you feel fits the label. It can be a specific technique, a novel way of using an item, or even a mindset. It can be a little-known product or a recommendation--whatever you deem fit, as long as it improves quality of life, productivity, or satisfaction.

I haven't posted at all on Tildes, but I've been here! I've seen how great of a community it is, even if it isn't that popular yet, so I wanted to ask you kind people for advice on where I should move to. Please tell me if this is the wrong group.

I can't decide where to move. I really want to live in a giant city like NYC because I have a degree in CS and computers are popular in big cities, plus I just enjoy them, but (as I'm sure everyone knows) it's super expensive. I also really love rain and snow. If any of you could recommend a relatively inexpensive city that rains and snows a lot, I'd greatly appreciate it. It doesn't have to be in the U.S. Thank you all so much!