I'm in my mid 20s and have had a pretty lonely life. I had a very lonely childhood, a less lonely but still fairly lonely adolescence, and again a very lonely time in college (in that case, because of a mix of mental hangups, the pandemic, personal circumstance that was a major drain on my time, and not managing all those things as optimally as I could have). At this point in my life, I essentially only have one friend, who I met a couple years ago and has since moved across the country.

I have more time on my hands now, am probably more socially adept than I used to be, but I find myself having lost or losing the drive to make friends. I guess I've gone so long without friends that I've lost sense at an emotional level of what the point even is. It's also friggin hard to meet people in the adult world and it seems like you have to put twice the energy to meet people that you vibe with half as much as when you were younger. I want to want to make friends, but it feels like I'd be setting myself up for more pain and disappointment by putting myself in that headspace. It also doesn't help that I'm pretty socially picky (not in a judgmental way, but I'd prefer a small circle of people I'm really close with over a large group that I'm not) and that I have a strong need to feel like the friends I make aren't "arbitrary", that they are the ones I am "meant" to be around. Has anyone experienced something similar or have any advice?

I had this idea that is mostly a pun. I want to train a Love Language Model (LLM) on a large corpus of love letters and/or poems. Tricky bit is to find a large collection that is available. Any advice on sources of transcribed love letters?

Edit: so far I've scraped a few website and downloaded a dataset from kaggle. I think it's enough for a just for fun project :)

Have you watched any movies recently you want to discuss? Any films you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like creative commons, opting in out and david attenborough. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was curious.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

@RoyalHenOil's comment in another thread got me thinking, and I feel like it might be helpful for me to hear what other Tilderinos have to share about this. I've wondered for years if I might have ADHD. Any time I've looked into it, it never seems like I check enough boxes for that to be an accurate label. But I've also gotten the impression that many psychological things like ADHD might be better understood as a spectrum (or even a region?), so lately I keep coming back to the possibility that I just have some other/related flavor of executive dysfunction. Or maybe I just haven't figured out how to "adult" properly yet for other reasons. I don't know, but it feels like being able to name the way my brain works would help things somehow.

I tried for hours to write up an explanation of my experiences, but I couldn't come up with anything that felt accurate and was a reasonable length, so the five-second version is this: The thing I keep coming across and identifying with is the "hyperfocus mode" that some people report. I enjoy this but also feel like it must have something to do with my struggles in some areas. I can prioritize tasks effectively plenty of the time, but I also can't at other times. If I used an Eisenhower matrix, things in the "important but not urgent" category would mostly be gathering dust (except for ones I happened to focus on). I don't really have any control over the "hyperfocus mode" and its target changes unpredictably.

There's an exhausting amount of nuance I could add to the above. I'd really love to hear from anyone who's had experience with any sort of divergent executive function that doesn't seem to fit into any of the currently available boxes we use to understand these things.

Addendum: I reread RoyalHenOil's comment just now and I think responding to it directly might be easier than writing out my own explanation from scratch, so I'll include that response here for anyone who feels like reading it.

Welcome all to our fortnightly (ish) gardening group discussion!

Feel free to discuss anything related to gardening, beginner or advanced, challenge or success.

Ive moved it to a fortnightly thread, as sometimes gardening can be a bit slooooowwww motion

The last couple of weeks I've been fooling around with different ideas for how to build a chess bot that's fun for beginners to play against. I don't have much real experience with chess, so I've mostly just been testing it against myself.

After looking into the different techniques that are used to force engines to play at a certain level, I put together my own (somewhat silly) approach and have had some fun playing against it. The problem is, as I don't really know what I'm doing when it comes to the actual game, I can't be a particularly good judge of how others will feel playing with it.

Regardless of your own skill level, I'd be super appreciative if anyone would give it a try and let me know what they think.

I'm working on a full write up of how it works, but here's the short version:

Radicalization has, of course, varied meanings to pretty much any person you ask to define it and it is both contextual and a spectrum. I will provide no definition of such here as this isn't a pissing contest and a person's definition is likely to be highly personal based on their own lived experiences up to and post said "radicalization".

Today is my yearly reminder of what I consider to be the impetus of what "radicalized" me.
So thought I'd ask all of you for yours.

I need to overhaul my home network.

I have a house on a lot that is ~60 meters by ~15 meters. my house is on one side and my garage is on the other, I have a little "studio" building in the middle.

I had relayed the signal around with 4 google/nest wifi mesh things for a decade or so. but I always felt locked out without even a web interface, just the home app. and then two of them died at the same time last month.

I ran some cable last weekend. Now I have 3 roughly equidistant wired switches wired together :House-Studio-Garage.
My current plan is just 3 wireless APs at each. I have a wired only brume 2 that i can use as the router.

I want to be able to have one SSID and roam between them. how well can that work without a mesh type network? just 3 good APs? My phone would stick to one before the mesh network. but that was a long time ago. Im hoping modern protocols might be better?

We have teenage kids, lots of phones and laptops plus wireless home automation devices, shelly switches, wyze cams, smart bulbs, etc.

I'm looking for something open source and as configurable as possible. I'm going in a linuxy direction lately and looking to have more direct access and control of my hardware. That's why I thought to ask here.

Claude and co have recommended:

Zyxel NWA50AXPRO
Cudy AP3000
Omada EAP670

After I pick an AP I also need to pick a switch. I used the old 3 switches I already had on hand: TRENDnet TEG-S82g, Netgear GS105, Netgear FS108. All 3 are unmanaged and one is 10/100. so I want to replace at least the slow one. I'm thinking of getting a managed switch with POE for the switch that connects to the router. I want to try running POE cameras at some point. I want to be able to make a plex server, NAS, etc. Again, I want something flexible and I don't mind fiddling with it or paying a little more for decent hardware. I'm considering the Zyxel GS1900-8HP.

Both the Zyxels apear to be openWRT compatable. which is something I may want to try.

I generally don't keep up with this stuff. I've never went very deep into networking before. I wanted to check with some real people. Has anyone used any of these, or any other good wireless APs? Is there another strategy that would work better for my setup?

Thanks for reading!

This topic is part of a series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss creative projects they have been working on.

Projects can be personal, professional, physical, digital, or even just ideas.

If you have any creative projects that you have been working on or want to eventually work on, this is a place for discussing those.

What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Have you watched any movies recently you want to discuss? Any films you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

In the past couple of weeks I've recently watched some console retrospective videos while doing some chores (Liam Triforce's videos on the PS2 and Dreamcast).

It got me curious if anyone would be interested in discussion/retrospective threads on the different console generations/consoles?

I was thinking about using the Wikipedia page for the history of video game consoles to guide this, and potentially adding in some threads for different stages of PC gaming (i.e. decade or 5 year periods).

If there is interest I was thinking of having this be a weekly post. I'd love feedback on which consoles to cover/how granular this would be.
I.e. would it be better to discuss all of a generation's consoles in one thread or separate threads.

Some sample questions I thought of for different consoles:

• What was your favorite memory of this console?
• Favorite/least favorite game on the console?
• "Hidden" games you've played that you think could use more attention?
• Have you gone back to play games on this console or do you still play this games on this console regularly?
• Do you have the console physically or do you emulate the console?
• Are there any region specific games that you wished had been brought to your region, and if there are have any of them been fan translated?
• Are there any interesting tidbits you'd like to share about the console? This could be from promotional campaigns, development stories, fun facts.

I don't play as many new games as I used to, but I've also realized there are tons of games on the consoles I did play that I have never heard of or got the experience to play and would love to go back and try them. I've also seen some channels where people try to play every game on a console which sounds like an interesting experience, especially the guy who is trying to play all 4,000+ PS2 games that were released!

Hello,

I realised that I dont ignore and/or filter out topics and/or tags because I think they are costly for the servers.

Is there something to it or is it almost free?

Can I help alleviate the cost by going back and "unignore" posts that won't clutter my frontpage any longer since they aren't active?

I've been getting more suggested game trailers on youtube and have been surprised by the number of "knock off" games. I've seen three different versions of Dregde (a game I absolutely adore) and a number that seem to be mimicking Hollow Knight. I don't even mean just like fishing or rogue like games, I mean like full on knock-offs.

I get the niche they fill, but I'm kind of curious about the ethics of it. Like, I would love to play more dredge but it doesn't appear more is on the way. But I also don't really want to support a company that is just completely ripping off everything from mechanics to art. Like this game seemingly took the actual artwork from Dredge. As a developer I think I'd be pretty pissed.

Is this really common and I'm just learning about it now? Is it the video game equivalent of Atlantic Rim? Where do people stand on playing these kind of knock off games?

Random question. What do the wonderful people of Tildes think about self promotion here? My wife is an indie author. As a proud and supportive husband, if I posted about her new book here is that fine or in poor taste? I searched but nothing came up, which made me assume I just wasn't searching correctly. But maybe no one has asked before?

So I would love to know/hear everyone's opinions.

Was listening to the new album by Young the Giant, and there is a sampled quote that I recognize that I cannot place. The song is: This Too Shall Pass (YouTube link to song), and they use it right in the opening.

The sample in it's entirety is:

"There's a new and strange environment at first

Just suddenly finding yourself in orbit"

According to this article, it is from a NASA video archive of the moon landing. So my question is, is there an easy way to search the use of this specific sample, to figure out who else used it to help me figure out why I recognize it? If you recognize the quote, feel free to comment where you recognize the sample from, and maybe it is the same place I recognize it from

I often hear that British English is better than American English, I've also heard people say that British English is "real english", but I'm not really sure why that is ?
what makes it better in your opinion and what makes American English worse ?
personally, I'm indian and I find it much easier to understand American English.

I managed to put a scratch into the d-pad on my steam deck and the replacement process looks more involved than I care for (gotta go through everything in the back to get to it). It's fairly shallow, about 1mm x 5mm, but right on the down button so it can be pretty tactilely distracting.

So I was thinking I may be able to 'refinish' it in some manner to get back a smooth, consistent feeling, but wasn't sure what I'd be able to use to achieve it. Any tips? I'm not too big on how most silicone button caps feel, but maybe I'll try one if it can adhere on the top and not try to fully cover it? Most seem to be going for some aesthetic though, which is also tactilely distracting.

Worst case scenario, maybe I use it as an excuse to replace the ABXY buttons too, they feel a bit loose and their friction when they slide against the edge instead of straight down is also a bad tactile sensation, so replacement button recommendations are also appreciated :)

SOLVED! I tried the suggestion from @mat first, which involved using acetone if it was ABS, and it was. I used several q tips, a cotton pad, and nail polish remover. Steps:

1. Clean area
2. With q tip lightly dampened with nail polish remover, swipe away from the middle of the d-pad, along the scratch, towards the edge.
3. Dry off/wipe down with cotton pad
4. Repeat until smooth!

It feels smooth to the touch and it even looks a bit better!

This is a recurring post to discuss programming or other technical projects that we've been working on. Tell us about one of your recent projects, either at work or personal projects. What's interesting about it? Are you having trouble with anything?

What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

The survey has been closed and the results are in!

Thank you to all the 244 people that responded! Check out the dashboard for a map visualization and a breakdown per continent, region and country! Here's a few quick stats:

• 43 distinct countries are represented!
• Spread across the following continents:
  • America at 48.5%
  • Europe at 39.0%
  • Asia at 6.2%
  • Oceania at 5.8%
  • Africa at 0.4%
• And the top 5 countries with the most responses:
  • United States at 37.7%
  • Canada at 8.2%
  • United Kingdom at 8.2%
  • Germany at 4.9%
  • Netherlands at 4.9%

• View the full results dashboard here
  • If you have any ideas for vizualisations or stats I can add I'd love to hear them!
• ZIP download of the data

Thank you all again for participating! I hope to see you in the next survey. :)

I keep thinking about this post from @first-must-burn and the genuinely amazing way he helped one of his family members, and it inspired me to ask this question.

No need to be modest or downplay your efforts in your answer. Feel free to pat yourself on the back and acknowledge the good job you did (even if it feels awkward to do so!).

So, according to my memory, I asked this question on Tildes "not that long ago."

Then I checked.

Chat, it was a LONG time ago. Excuse me while I crumble into dust.

Anyway, given that the Linux landscape looks very different than it did not that long ago in 2018, I figure we're due for another topic like this:

• Which Linux distro do you use, and, most importantly, why do you prefer it?

What are some ways to grow your savings without investing it into the stock market/401k?

In short, I don't want my savings to fund giant corporations. It seems like most mutual funds can't exist without a portfolio of such corporations despite calling themselves green or ethical.

I've been storing funds in CDs or HYSEs but wondering if there are any other avenues.

My knowledge here is about a decade out of date so I would like to ask for some advice and recommendations. I am looking less for a specific model to buy and more for personal experiences and general tips on what to look at or good review sites or knowledge bases.

Ideally I'd want a general purpose midsized flat monitor with higher refresh rate.
Mostly what I find are either gamer branded items usually without chain linking or data interface or office ones with 60hz though I'll work around of what is available. The image quality is the important part.

What price ranges and display technologies should I be looking at to get a generally good image without too many compromises?

I recently visited Albuquerque and spent almost a full day at their botanical gardens. It was awesome and made realize how much I love bioparks.
Of all the attractions a city may have, they always delight and never leave me conflicted like I feel at zoos and aquariums.

So I ask the people of Tides: where are the best bio parks and what makes them great?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like beast studios, steam controller and anonymity. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, for those following along.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!