American election mental health thread
I posted my own thoughts here, TLDR: I am afraid and catastrophizing and thinking very black and white and spiraling quite a bit and I'm not even American.
Click to view it copy/pasted
They have sweeped the election and are now in control of the house, the senate, the supereme court.
I'm a Scandinavian but I am very afraid for the queer community over there and for us here - American politics has far reaching influence on western countries. If the right wing wins the next election, they will take many pages out of the Republican book and likely roll back policies on especially trans people - the minister of equality already said "the rights of trans people should be limited".
While Russia doesn't have the capacity to do much else than provoking NATO in terms of playing around on the Eastern European borders, we will definitely be seeing a lot more hybrid warfare in the next 4 years. I am very afraid for Ukraine because despite Zelensky's visit and meeting with Trump, they are a lot less likely if not guaranteed to receive way less support now because the Republican party as a whole is more isolationist than the Democratic party.
This also means that while not under immediate existential threat, I don't think China is likely to turn down rhetoric nor "exercises" and border provocations regarding Taiwan. China has been building their military for years at this point, spending almost as much on it as the US when accounting for purchasing power. There has been speculation that they will be capable of launching an attack by 2030. I'm saying all this because Biden's promise about defending Taiwan probably won't be extended by Trump's government.
Palestine and Lebanon is in more danger than ever. Israel will increase their aggression and more civilians will die through excuses that killing 1 terrorist hiding in a hospital is worth the lives of dozens of innocents. They will annex more of the west bank, settlements will increase, everything will be worse. Iran, Turkey, Azerbaijan, you name it, can all become more aggressive and commit more and more crimes against humanity because the white supremacist isolationist American government will do nothing.
And then there's all the other things that I don't know as much about. But homophobia, sexism, and racism has once again won. It has been legitimized. Human rights worldwide will suffer because of this, not to mention the disastrous consequences for our climate and environment.
This is not meant to be another ~news thread.
Please keep discussion in this thread to mental health only.
How are you doing?
What will the impact of this be on your life?
I'm numb today -- I can't even express what I'm feeling.
How does a majority of the country look at a person who has been found liable for sexual assault, guilty of 34 counts of fraud, credibly accused of retaining and mishandling classified documents, who has spoken of being a dictator and looking for retribution, incited a violent mob to overturn a legal election, had many of his former cabinet and fellow Republicans publicly endorse his opponent saying that he was unfit and a danger to the country, etc, etc... and say "yes, that's the person I want"?
I was so hopeful that we were about to turn the corner. Now... I just want it all to end (no, I don't mean THAT), I never want to hear his voice again, I never want to see his disgusting mug again, I'm sick and tired of the division, the license that he gives to openly express hate.
I can't even imagine what turmoil is ahead, but given that last time as bad as I expected him to be I underestimated just how bad he would be by an order of magnitude at least I'm absolutely terrified -- if I underestimated him this time, we're F'ed and I fear that the rest of the world is too.
Before I could at least fall back on "at least he lost the popular vote, the majority of people aren't that bad", but now I don't even have that to give me hope. :(
For populist autocratic demagogues such as trump, their path to power has been long tested and proven throughout history.
Appeal to the common man, speak to their hardships, speak to their angers and hatred.
Promise them you will better their lives, alleviate their hardships, and strike violently at the targets of their anger and hate. Stoke the anger.
Decry non-supporters as traitors. Take credit for everything good, blame all ills and failures on the opposition, vilifying them.
Explain away that anything you have made worse is the fault of the opposition, and the only reason things got worse in the first place is that you have not yet been given enough power to forever solve the problem of your vile, evil political opponents, who are responsible for all wrongs in your supporters lives.
Maintain a track record of loyalty above all. Anyone, even at the top of your own party, who shows disloyalty, is quickly cast aside and labeled as traitor. Show everyone in all other positions of wealth, power, or authority, that loyalty alone will keep them safe. Loyalty alone will allow them to reap rewards. Loyalty alone will deliver them more wealth and power. Any failure of loyalty to the Leader will brand you as traitor, cast out, stripped of wealth, power, and possibly life itself.
Encourage and push your loyalists to aggressively witch-hunt for any hint of disloyalty, any lack of enthusiastic obedience. Constantly fear-monger to your base about the dire threat of the enemy within. Incite the mob, protect the mob from consequence while publicly lauding their righteousness, ensuring that those who could, potentially, dethrone you are constantly vigilant on your behalf, slathering to betray one another in pursuit of lavish rewards. By this manner, those in key positions of power beneath you cannot plot against you, lest any of their peers seize the opportunity to betray them for their own gain. Absolute power grows, division sown among any who could threaten your reign, and so much of the job of maintaining your power and the unquestioning, obedient loyalty of your base is fulfilled by the base itself, constantly on the watch for those they can accuse of 'witchcraft' and have them torn apart by the mob.
That is one of the basic paths to power. It pits brother against brother, neighbor against neighbor.
Slight variations on this path have been used over and over again throughout history. Because It Works.
This is chillingly accurate. What's frustrating is I don't know any examples where others were successfully able to fight back without bloodshed and loss of life. It seems autocrats of this type easily stay in power until they are killed or die of other causes.
Its a societal virus that societies can catch and become contagious with.
Just like actual viruses, theres things that put your society at risk of catching this. Lots of people experiencing a loss in their quality of life in a short time is the biggest risk factor.
Our society may as well have been chain smoking cigarettes, with climate change reducing the amount of resources to go around it was a matter of time.
And now we watch as every country becomes sick one after another. It started with the middle east and will end in Europe.
There are additional points to explore. All is not lost, all is never lost (unless and until the human race dies - if there is literally no-one left, then fine, all is literally lost). While trite, 'where there is life, there is hope' is still true.
There are elements that can be woven into a society to inoculate it against such attacks.
WEALTH EQUALITY - the better the wealth equality of a society, the higher the average standard of living is, the less severe and widespread the discontent will be which such demagogues prey upon. We have quite severe wealth inequality in the USA, and that has been part of what enabled trump.
WIDESPREAD QUALITY OF EDUCATION FOR ALL, FROM THE RICHEST TO THE POOREST - 'Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it' - that quote could not be more perfectly apt for this situation. By complete coincidence, Project 2025 lists the removal of the department of education as a priority. Can't have the unwashed masses even conceiving that life might be better if things were different, and from that awareness, daring to ask for change.
As a subsection of education, a high quality course on civics, taught EVERY YEAR FROM KINDERGARDEN TO 12TH GRADE IN EVERY PUBLIC SCHOOL, with an unfiltered view of the harsh, violent past we have endured and on/off overcome (politics, civil rights, bodily autonomy, gender and racial equality as related to voting rights, etc...) would yield a huge, lasting resistance to such attacks on our society. Again, I refer to the completely coincidental priority of the dismantling of the department of education.
NEWS MEDIA - THE FAIRNESS DOCTRINE and/or other enforceable bindings on news entities that have penalties for lying to the public, insinuating mis and dis-information, and otherwise acting less in the role of informing the public, and more in the role of constant partisan propaganda. This would need to be done with care and force, and would largely depend on having very good structure to make abuse (silencing or intimidating legitimate press) as difficult and unlikely as possible. It would be neither easy, nor simple.
Our news media has become more and more polarized as hyper-capitalist 'whatever gets more views and more money is best' naturally lends itself to sensationalism, shock, rage, blood and division. The more outrage that can be engendered, the more watch time and ad-revenue you can generate. This is good for profits. This is not good for society. Those last two sentences lead to the next point:
DISENTANGLE PROFIT-MOTIVE FROM PUBLIC WORKS - when I say 'public works' in this instance I refer to anything that the primary purpose is for the good of society as a whole. The US Postal Service is a fairly good example. Healthcare (we do a terrible job here - full regulatory capture by for profit entities has well sunk in). Practically anything that goes under the umbrella of 'infrastructure' - roads, bridges, telecommunications and other utilities (I consider telecom to be a utility), clean uncontaminated drinking water, energy reliability, public transportation, food reliability / food affordability... the list goes on, with some items being more clear-cut than others, and some items only having a so/so intersection between public works and 'this is reasonable to be private sector / for-profit' - life isn't simple, and neither are these issues.
There are more. Some are more fundamental, other are more tertiary.
EDIT: probably my most important bit of advice to share for our current circumstances.
The perfect is the enemy of the good.
Don't look at these ideas and goals and feel defeated at the unachievable scope and insurmountable roadblocks that bar your way. Can you improve literally anything on a small scale, local to you. Can you attend county-level meetings that discuss your school board? Can you talk with your local newspaper or TV station? Can you vote in the smallest-scale, local elections? Are you willing to attend a protest? Just one?
Don't give up because you can't achieve the whole, can't enact every ideal. Do what you can, where you can, when you can. Even if it is very small. Something is more than nothing, and the perfect is the enemy of the good.
It's because none of those things mattered to a lot of voters. Many people simply voted based on their perception of the current state of the economy and the polling on that was horrific leading into the election (regardless if that perception was accurate or not).
NBC Exit Polls:
This phrase remains eternally relevant
This makes me so sad because the lower income people are the ones who are about to get the worst of it, economically. I would say maybe this will shake things up for next time, but I am really afraid that we wont get a next time.
The question is, can Democrats run on a message besides “we told you so” next time? Because I could see GOP voters hurting themselves in their confusion again if so.
I sincerely hope that there is a next time.
The people who I’m upset at are not the people who said yes I want this dictator. The people who I am upset with are the people who saw the chance to prevent us from happening and did not vote to stop it. There were so few people voting this year. Such an important year. And we all know people on the right are more likely to win when people don’t vote. That is how tyrants win. Their seal of approval is the dismissal of people who would oppose him.
At the same time I was hearing reports of record turnout, reports of early mail ballots exceeding prior total turnout -- I thought for sure that people were actually showing up.
In Texas, at the halfway point of early voting we were ahead in total numbers of votes from 2020 but a couple percentage points behind in terms of percentage of registered voters. I live literally across the street from a polling place and there were lines most days the first week of early voting but literally no lines after that. Yesterday, on election day, I saw 5 cars in the parking lot at a time at most. :(
Here’s voter turnout by state:
2024 turnout is near the 2020 record. See how each state compares (Washington Post)
It’s still pending, but looks about the same as four years ago so far.
Yes. I have family members who are minorities, LGBT, women...who decided not to vote "because Gaza." My mother in law actually said she couldn't wait until today when things would "go back to normal." In the big picture, their votes wouldn't matter, our state still is blue pretty much across the board, but I can't shake how angry I am at them.
Did these one-issue non-voters really think Palestinians would better off with a Republican over a Democrat..?
No, they felt there was no real difference. And I do agree that there was no choice that was actually good for the people in Gaza. But they got wrapped up in their own feeling of virtuous morality and sacrificed the lives of people here on that altar. Like possibly their own children's. I tried. My partner tried.
Partly because Israel is our ally, for better or worse we have obligations to support them. So on the surface it's the same, it's not like we're going to stop helping Israel. But the difference is that Harris & Democrats will rein in the worst that Netanyahu wants to do and get more aid to Gazans. Trump won't give a shit, he wants Netanyahu to be able to freely genocide the Palestinians and "end the war quickly". And I'm astounded that people who refused to vote for Harris over this don't understand that.
Yeah, I agree. It's not a republican problem, it's a democrat problem.
Trump had a couple of million votes less than against Biden. Kamala has 15 million (!) fewer votes than Biden had. Where were all these voters? Why didn't they bother to show up? Or how did they come to the conclusion that now is a good time to vote third party?
It's ridiculous. I'm not American, but I dreaded this day and my worst fears came true. This will affect the world and there isn't a goddamn thing I can do.
Ukraine.
Taiwan.
Gaza.
Lebanon.
Iran?
Beyond that, it's anyone's guess.
Trump will do nothing at all to keep the autocrats of the world in check other than praise them.
It truly is baffling.
I can understand that people are all over the political spectrum. I can even see the reasons why someone would vote for policies that directly hurts marginalized people - perhaps because of religious belief for example. But I will never fucking ever understand how any decent human being, much less a majority, can accept and vote for someone like that man. If he was part of your family, you would dread every single birthday and holiday. He is the crazy cousin and the disgusting uncle.
Democrats shot themselves in the foot, time and time again. They made all the wrong choices. Didn’t campaign effectively and let Trump control the narrative. At this point, they’re self-selected controlled opposition.
Obviously I blame the right wing propaganda machine. I blame ignorant and uninformed voters. I blame Trump. I blame every coward and opportunist who enabled him. I feel hatred for all of them.
But today, I'm taking a moment to reflect on where the Democrats could have done better. I'm reflecting on conversations I've had with every Trumper I know personally. Here is what I've come up with:
We messed up. We built our movement on fighting oppression but ignored one majorly oppressed group. For decades now, we have let our kind and empathetic hearts bleed on the floor for people of color, people with different sexual and gender orientations, for addicts (I'm one), for immigrants, and for every other minority group. They got scholarships, they got support, we made it completely unacceptable to insult them or use derogatory words about them.
But all that time we - myself included - had pretty much zero reservations about calling someone a dumb hillbilly. We preached about complex and nuanced topics like white privilege to people whose white privilege was not making their lives any easier. We mocked them, we looked down on them, and we were disgusted by their ignorance and lack of education.
When Americans from urban areas commit crimes and join gangs, we are always quick to rattle off statistics and outline the systemic inequalities creating these outcomes. When rural Americans are undereducated and fall victim to conspiracy theories, we blame them personally. We don't talk about the systemic issues that lead them there. Instead, we leave them to be led astray by wolves dressed like sheep. When those wolves gut education and perpetuate rural poverty, we blame the victims and judge them harshly. Then we are surprised to find that they don't like us.
There are a lot of words you (rightfully) can't say out in the open anymore, but redneck, hillbilly, toothless, and even insults like cousin fucker never made that list. Throwing around the word "racist" is pretty much consequence-free, despite the fact that it's a really serious and hurtful allegation.
When I look back, it's hard to imagine a bigger middle finger to working class people than Hillary Clinton. Do I think she would have been better for them than Trump in the long-term? Absolutely. But seeing that requires one to understand nuance and think about the big picture in complex and abstract ways. Close your mind a bit and just look at the issue on its face. The optics and the social implications of ramming Clinton through will haunt us for a long time. Even as a liberal Democrat, I find Clinton's run pretty insulting when I really consider it.
Perhaps if we had embraced the working class whites 20 years ago, things would be different today. Perhaps we could have working and lower class folks of all backgrounds voting for abortion rights, women's rights, labor rights, and gay rights. Maybe they would be our most loyal allies. But instead, we abandoned them and let the wolves pretend to be their friends. To be clear, it doesn't absolve them of blame when Trump inevitably does all the awful things he said he will do - but maybe we could have taken the systemic view and tried to bring these folks into the fold without putting them down.
I'm coming to realize that America is largely made up of these people, and they are absolutely fucking pissed. A child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth. We haven't been listening. This is our reckoning.
I think that's something that more people need to do on the Democrat side, and I have a few points regarding that.
There's this odd assumption that just because minority Americans know that many republicans hate them, that they must be along for the ride on the rest of the democratic platform. The latino vote especially has been taken for granted for far too long, and when you actually look at the demographics they hold a lot of similar beliefs with the south. They often come from very catholic families, and by extension have very serious views on abortion, and by tangential extension, the entire LGBTQ platform. The Cuban American population is routinely ridiculed for "voting against their interests" for, understandably, being super against ANY communist messaging, and this is common among lots of 2nd generation Americans who's parents literally fled communist countries.
"Not that communism"/"well this is just socialism"/"well the embargo"/"its only a few fringe members"is not a strong argument for the people who lost so much they fled a country. It also helps to realize that every time you rattle off about how "dumb" those hillbillies are for having views on abortion, you're insulting a huge % of your own base that feels the same way.
The absolutism of you're either a baby killer or a misogynist does not trade favorably for the democrats. Obviously the republicans will keep up that messaging for a whole slew of reasons, but the dems trying to frame it solely as woman's rights has failed miserably. Most polling data shows that people are in favor of some level of abortion, and that they're in favor of some limit on abortion. Most don't care if you take plan B the day after, and most do care if you want to abort 8 months in. So when you take the all or nothing "well you're just a controlling man/idiot woman" approach as your response to the abortion discussion, people are going to assume the worst and think that just because you want people to try and abort earlier, they're now calling you horrible things.
They have got to pivot on their messaging on this issue because right now they're just losing ground on it, and it shows in so many ways.
Bluntly, democrats talking about guns sounds an awful lot like "the internet is a series of tubes". Hilary Clinton complained about silencers the day after the Vegas shooting took place and this is one of many situations where people who know even the bare minimum about firearms are rightfully pissed because of how obvious it is that they don't know fucking anything about what they're talking about.
It's extra fucking horrifying because the right, correctly, gets called out for being woefully willing to look the other way every time there's a mass shooting, but people seem to think the left is actually championing the issue. This is like if Boeing planes started falling from the sky and they said "well they need better seatbelts" level of jackassery, but unfortunately people don't call it out.
Further, their stance has become more and more hypocritical, again mostly to those living in poor and/or minority communities. "You don't need guns to defend yourself!" "ok so what should we do" "oh call the cops..." is a bad fucking look right now (much like nominating a prosecutor for vp during country wide demonstrations and outright riots over police murdering innocents).
With Trump elected again, rational or not, I'll bet money we'll see even more gun owners on the left, and it's only going to look worse for them every time they're just factually wrong, or every time they're trying to "fight" for the minorities who rightfully have issues trusting the police. At the end of the day everyone knows the politicians are still going to have armed men and women following them around, this is only a law for "us".
Pelosi is back in office, again and still a major party leader and I think one of the many examples of what is wrong with the democratic party. I despise what the Republican party has become but I feel like any time you point out "gee maybe the party elites who have lead us now to several devastatingly awful defeats and strategic decisions should go", it's met with "no the republicans made up story X about them and it's all a fantasy". Pelosi having the gall to say "it's a free market" when asked about banning congressional stock trading just shows how little they care about meaningful change if it might actually affect them.
When I was growing up it was, mostly, the religious conservatives that was ridiculed for trying to police speech, especially humor they didn't agree with. The dems have always had a pearl clutching streak (tipper gore on music and Hilary Clinton on violent video games come to mind), but around 2016 it kicked into overdrive, and it's a bad look.
I understand that we don't want words like retard being used as common slang for stupid, but as wolf already pointed out hillbilly, racist, and yes even fascist are thrown around instead with the exact same intention and often just as much proof (the latter ones being especially dangerous because yes there are literal fascists/racists in politics and it's not the edgelords on 4chan).
I know politics and culture move fast these days, but I found it extra hypocritical and galling for that period leading up to and during Trumps first presidency, at the height of all this, where a lot of leftists decided that while you can't use a long list of words even in bad taste humor, cuck was a perfectly ok insult to throw around.
Again, the average person has always been about the same. We've got excellent access to echo chambers that will tell you what you want to hear, but at the end of the day most people don't vote based on much more than "things cost more". If you want to fix the economy, something as nebulous (and not strongly backed) as "tax capital gains" means fuck all to the person looking at how the fuck they're going to make rent.
Find jobs for the blue collar workers who were abandoned in the "blue wall" and find ways to make rent better. That's probably 90% of the job, and Biden did in fact do that to the very best of his admin's ability, but they sure as shit didn't make that clear.
If a sports team went on the "should've won but lost/barely won in spite of themselves" streak the democrats have managed since 2016 even diehard fans would be calling for heads to roll.
In politics there's this unfortunate (almost moba like) phenomena where it's somehow everyone else's fault. We all know the rules, we all know the setting. People haven't turned into plants or anything insane. At some point, like it or not, you need to actually figure out what your opponent is doing that's working, and how to deal with it. And if that continues to not work, you need to change.
So why are you losing? Why are these your strategies? Why did they first condemn, and then hire, debbie in 2016? Why did biden have to be the candidate in 2020 after no one else could get their act together? Why did biden have to be FORCED to step down after a disaster people had been predicting since he was elected?
These are all small and minor examples of the MANY incompetent moves by the democratic party as a whole, and people just aren't being held responsible. Again many hate McConnell and the republican old guard and he's not going anywhere even if people want him to, but at least he's actually getting what he wants. The democratic old guard are just as entrenched and flat out losing repeatedly.
Damn I already gave an Exemplary tag today so can't tag your reply. I believe your diagnosis of where it went so very wrong is spot on. As long as the democratic party continues to resort to sitting on their high horse and arrogantly treating the voters they need as ignorant, bigoted and stupid, they'll continue to lose. Hopefully they get the chance to learn from this and come back but unfortunately far right governments are very very good at holding on to power once they have it.
I don’t understand why the Democrats haven’t just “bought off” some of the right base over the last few years. Clearly this was a real threat.
I don't know enough about what drives cultural or socioeconomic change in your country but I can definitely say with some confidence that were it not for the propaganda machine (Fox News and the like, I assume is what you refer to), Trump would not ever have happened.
I’m hurting. My husband’s hurting. This morning he asked me to just hold him a few minutes before we left for work.
We are, of course, not the only ones hurting.
While I embraced my husband this morning, our dog nestled in with us too. He has no idea what is going on — he just knew that he was happy to see us again after waking up today (as he is every day). He was smiling; his tail was wagging. For as bad as I feel right now, his earnest sunshine really did make things feel just a little bit lighter for me.
Taking a cue from him, my goal, for the immediate future, is to be nice and kind to people I know. Go out of my way to compliment them, thank them, support them, and just generally be a positive part of their lives. Not in a false or overbearing way — just in a relatively quiet, muted, but genuine one. I want to try to make things just a little bit lighter for the people I know.
I think many of us need that right now.
Edit: Thank you for making this topic, @smoontjes. I’m always touched by people, especially those outside of the United States, who reach out to us in kindness. Tildes is full of people from other countries who go out of their way to help support us Americans, and I’m very grateful for that.
Pets are basically angels, aren't they?
My goal will also be to just kind of resign to this fate, turn down how often I check the news (I will try to limit it to once a day, and only the front page to see if anything is important to me), and focus on my loved ones - friends and family. Ultimately, the people closest to us are what matters most.
And you are most welcome. I needed it too so thought I might as well make it.
This is a fantastic take on the situation. I'm going to try to follow your lead. Thanks for sharing. Keep spreading the positivity.
I am disabled. No country would take me. I'm terrified. I am afraid of losing the small amount of disability social security I get, because we really need it. I'm afraid of having to put our pets to sleep because we can't afford to keep them. I'm afraid I will lose medicare and there are medicines that are literally keeping me from dying, what happens if I cant get them?
I feel like the country I grew up in is gone. I don't know this country. How could so many people not care about their daughters dying from a miscarriage? How could so many people be okay with forcible removal of refugees, of collusion with Russia, of recreating our country to benefit billionaires and foreign dictators. I live in a blue state, and it is still blue, but many of the people around me voted for Trump, I am sure. I really don't think they are aware how badly the world is going to change for them. Some are racists, some are misogynists, sure, but the rest...I really don't know.
I am so sad for Ukrainians. I am so sad for the creatures of the earth. I feel like America is gone.
It hurts to read this. I hope that you can find ways to persevere.
Thank you. Thank you for starting this topic.
I am not doing great. I have a young daughter and it is terrifying to me watching her autonomy be ripped away every year.
I had considered leaving the US before, and this will hopefully seal the deal. I am going to start reaching out to some people that I know around the world about job openings.
I'd love to leave but with a blended family it isn't an option. Good luck to you.
I hope that you can. Best wishes.
Where would you think of going?
I am not okay. I am baffled at how stupid many of my fellow Americans are, where they just voted in an impeached convicted felon racist, Hitler loving cunt with ZERO policy plan besides hate. The red senate majority along with a trump presidency means that we’re just fucked. How could people let this happen?
I have some time to think about it, but I’m legitimately going to be coming up with exit plans. I’m a trans woman, I don’t want to stay here and chance what might happen to me. I trust Minnesota to protect me as long as possible, but I’m guessing it’s only a matter of time until the fascists start spinning “states rights” as “for the woke libs” so they can start forcing their shitty policy nation wide.
I am going to try to take this one day at a time, but it’s very realistic that I need to start looking into where I can immigrate and start looking for jobs. That said, even Europe and Canada are facing similar issues right now, even if not as bad as the US. For some fucked up reason, authoritarianism is now trendy and I guess people have completely forgotten the 1930’s and 1940’s. Many Americans have lived through the Cold War, too, you’d think they’d know better.
I'm a cis white male living in a very liberal state and I'm terrified, I can't even imagine how you must be feeling.
I've also considered exit plans, but I'd want my adult kids to go with me, and that's not going to happen -- one of them has struggle figuring out life and has no degree or career, so no country would take her, one has a tenure track position in a very niche field of research and can't easily hop to another university, and the other is just now graduating.
Besides, where do we go? If Russia is allowed to steamroll Ukraine, the rest of Europe will be next on his radar, and there's no way that Trump will do anything to resist him -- I'm afraid that the neighboring countries in Europe will be the next to fall and that we're in a replay of the early buildup to WW2, meaning that the unsurvivable WW3 will be next.
I wish I was being hyperbolic and overreacting, but last time I had a full-on panic attack for the first time ever and I wasn't even close to understanding the full scope of how bad he was going to be.
Russia has a GDP the size of Italy. Or Mexico. Their war in Ukraine is not only stalemated, it's also unsustainable and reliant on their huge reserves of munitions from the USSR's overpreparation for WW3. Those munitions are running out, which is why they're buying artillery shells from North Korea (NK's shells are extremely low quality, inaccurate, and unreliable).
If the US refuses to defend Europe, then 1) France has nukes, 2) the UK has nukes, 3) Luxembourg has nukes, and 4) the rest of Europe still do have armies and air forces.
Meanwhile, Europe has been frantically building up their armies after not only the Ukraine war (which doubled as a good excuse to ditch outdated equipment as "aid", BTW), but the first Trump administration soundly demonstrating that the US was not quite so reliable of an ally. Especially Poland.
So, if you're afraid to come to Europe, don't be. If you still are, then there's also Australia and New Zealand (please don't look at our naval strategy though).
Edit: Probably shouldn't have posted this in the mental health thread, my apologies. Deleted
Trump wouldn’t even have to send anything to Putin. Just take off the sanctions and let China have free rein to give whatever they want to Russia without their current guise of “dual use” weapons and tech.
Europe alone cannot compete with China’s manufacturing capability.
I visited NZ earlier this year and absolutely loved it. Would love to live there, and it was clear that the country is looking for skilled labor to move there (money incentives, and the end of the tour at the top of the gondola in Christchurch was basically a big advertisement to move there), but moving is hard.
I’m at the upper end of or just passed the accepted age range (even though I have in-demand skills, I forget the cutoff age), my wife is retired and older than me, my daughter hasn’t figured out life and has no education nor skills that would give her the right to move there, my wife’s son is a tenure track professor in a field that is hard to find positions in, and my son is just graduating with an engineering degree in a month(he’d have the easiest chance).
If it were just me, I would have come in 2016 — I seriously looked into it.
That said, if the US topples the entire world will be unstable. At least they cannot find NZ on the map to invade, since it was left off.
NZ and Switzerland have the best shots at western stability. NZ is also supposed to have a limited impact from climate change. I’m young and have in-demand skills. But someone on this site mentioned there’s a huge visa backlog. I’ll have to look into it myself.
As an American who moved to Europe after Trump's first win (though not strictly in direct response to it), I don't think the threat of Russia conquering Europe is a very realistic fear. What's a much bigger fear is racist, xenophobic far right parties gaining further power within Europe, emboldened by Trump's election, and making life worse in many of the same ways. This was already a scary trend that I would've been very worried about even if Harris had won. Now that fear has only been amplified.
I don’t know enough to say whether this will be helpful, but maybe give this a try:
When you talk about how this affected you last time, is it the emotional effect, based on reading terrible things in the news? Or is due to concrete, tangible effects on your life, either personally or people you know? What are those effects? (You don’t have to answer that, but it’s something to think about.)
As an example, I’ll go through this exercise for myself: physically, the most visible federal presence is the post office and the national parks. I think they’ll be okay. I know someone who works for the federal government, and policy changes could affect them, but federal employees are hard to fire, and they do have other resources. I know immigrants, but the ones I know well are here legally. Immigration reform would be great, the status quo pretty bad, but it’s been bad for a long time. All the elderly people I know depend on Medicare, but I don’t think either Trump or Republican legislators are interested in changing that.
This isn’t to downplay emotional effects. They’re real and important. But making distinctions helps to figure out what to do. If it’s the news that’s affecting you, it’s possible to avoid it. For example: it looks bad for Ukraine. I’m unhappy about that. However, we aren’t in Ukraine. Realistically, this is a news story I have a strong interest in, without a personal connection, and I don’t need to follow it. Similarly, though it sounds callous to say, I don’t think I know any woman who wouldn’t have the resources to get an abortion if they wanted one, so that’s in the news and not a personal connection, though I do know women who feel strongly about it.
Then there are the wildcards, the major events that could affect us all. I don’t believe Trump is interested in starting a war, but there are always low-probability catastrophes to worry about. All I can say is, we’ve lived with nuclear weapons all our lives and we shouldn’t let uncertainty over such things get in the way of living our lives.
This has been an exercise in cope, but coping well is often important. I’m also rather fortunate and out of touch. Depending on personal circumstances, other coping strategies may work better for you.
As a white hetero male, I am just...so sorry. I don't even know what to say. I'm just so sorry for what "my people" are doing, and for how much progress is likely to be lost. And for the fear and uncertainty that minorities and women are now experiencing.
I wouldn't say that you have to wear what 'your people' are doing.
While this is certainly about identity, the decision to elect him is shared among any number of ethnic groups bound by a lack of foresight, plenty of personal grief and an all out lack of awareness about how democracy works.
Yeah this isn’t 2016, where Trump won solely based on the shifting uneducated white male vote in the electoral college. He did better across every demographic group than last time. NYT projects he’ll win the popular vote by about 1%.
This is simply a country wide failure.
It makes me feel so bad. Last night I just felt awful for my girlfriend, my queer friends, and members of all the minority groups that Republicans hate so much in general. Someone at my work came out as trans (in Texas) literally 2 days ago and I feel bad for them. I don't really know how I can actually help besides voting for Democrats and speaking up for what's right. :/
You being aware of what's going on makes you different from those you're describing. Those that voted for trump are not "your people" and you don't have to live with that.
I am very afraid for you and all the rest of our American trans siblings and the LGBT+ community at large. There are no words because I can't even say anything uplifting, like I just wouldn't believe it myself. It is guaranteed to get worse and I am so sorry.
Like I said, I'm in probably the safest state and have the most chance. We've enshrined LGBT rights here. Inauguration isn't until January and trump's first goal is mass deportation and tariffs. I figure I have at least a year to figure out and execute a plan + whatever time I get from my state protecting me. One thing I'm not certain about is how long I can continue getting my necessary medication. My birth certificate and all documentation has been updated years ago with my gender, so I may be safe on that front too (as far as the government is concerned, I've always been a woman), but I'm not counting on it.
California and New York also have enshrined LGBT rights. I can't speak for other states but California, but we have explicitly enshrined transgender rights, which include healthcare (medi-cal, the state free health insurance for those with very low income explicitly covers top surgery, bottom surgery, facial surgery, voice therapy, hair removal, mental health therapy, full drug cost coverage for hormones, etc.), and California also has a history of enacting state laws which affect the entire country as well as the entire world - a quirk we can get away with because of how huge our economy is. I strongly believe that California is perhaps the best place in the world for a transgender person to currently exist (especially if they are in/near San Francisco which is the only city with a transgender district in the world). If you're considering moving, I would highly recommend this state.
Thank you for the information. Cali was something I was already considering before this election. I do want to be a home owner someday and I likely wouldn't ever be able to in Cali, but I've been debating if I want to give that up for what may be an even safer state and one where I can lean into my sports car hobby more (we do get a solid 7 months of sports car weather in MN, but it's sad to put them away for the winter, even if I have a fun winter car too). Pros and cons, my current income will go a lot further in MN than Cali, but having beaches and warm weather all year sounds kind of nice, as well as a stronger guarantee that my rights are safe, but then there is the impending climate doom that will likely affect Cali before MN...
I do love Minnesota and we tend to fly under the radar, so I'm hoping we don't get noticed as a safe haven, but if we do, we probably can't resist as effectively as Cali can, given Cali's economic sway. I think my likely plan is to use the next few months to work out if Minnesota will be safe enough for me for the next 4 years (and hopefully only 4 years, maybe even just 2 if the house and senate can flip back to blue in 2026...) and if I don't think that will be the case, start thinking about other countries where it would be realistic for me to find a job and live there. I was feeling almost entirely hopeless this morning when trump won and the senate went red, but knowing the house might go blue, but now I'm pretty utterly hopeless knowing the house might stay red on top of a red senate and presidency. To know they could make me illegal with one bill and will probably try to do so is utterly terrifying.
Trans stuff, maybe slightly TMI: I was still undecided on bottom surgery, but now I feel forced to get an orchiectomy in case my meds are taken away, even though it might later tank my chances of success on vaginoplasty. I shouldn't have to be making these decisions based on who's controlling the government, I just want to live my life, dammit.
As an FYI- Cali is huge and there's a lot of land where housing is dirt cheap. It's pretty much all out in the middle of nowhere, which may or may not be your thing.
The more expensive places to live also come with strong community and better pay (especially if you can learn how to do tech, of which I know countless trans girls who've done so as a means to survive out here).
When they just do an orchi they basically never take the scrotal skin, which is the important part (but only if you don't have enough penile skin, if you're aiming for PIV). Split and full thickness grafts can easily be taken from the inner thighs and stomach. There's also the possibility of utilizing peritoneal tissue if there isn't enough length. You do lose the tunica vaginalis that surrounds the testes, however, which can also be used to line the vagina (similar to peritoneal tissue) but that's much rarer/newer and we don't have good long term outcomes. Long story short, you're perfectly fine to have an orchi even if you want a vaginoplasty later.
Most immediately, deep fears for my trans friends in the US. Fears for how it will all filter through here in the UK, where we were spared a right wing government in our recent election due only to right wing vote splitting, and where the relevant narratives are ever more normalised.
But also a dwindling faith in humanity, a feeling of revulsion towards my fellow human. Anger at the blind stupidity. Bordering on the irrational feeling that on some level we collectively deserve what comes, sick and wrong though that is, because it always falls on those least deserving. However, media lies and misinformation and whatever, 51%+ of people who voted, actively voted for an agenda that has been pretty well exposed for very many years, and I don't know how I can forgive them for that, how we can recover from that. If all together we're that stupid and corruptible, what chance to we have?
I'm feeling the same loss of faith in humans. It's just unfathomable that so many have these beliefs.
I read an article recently that the new leader of the Conservative party is even more transphobic than her predecessors. It seems much of the Anglo world are fully embracing these hateful narratives. Sending my thoughts and hope that when future UK elections hold onto Labour because while not great, they are the lesser evil.
I just can not fathom how people can find their idea of gender to be the fabric of society. It’s as though someone changing how gender works is an attack on their world view and safety. Gender is a meme. It was always a meme.
I 100% agree it’s a meme but unfortunately that definitely is an attack on a lot of religious people’s world view.
Honestly, this is kind of a wake up call for me. For the past few years politics was an obsession. I've been compulsively checking the news, refreshing my tabs, just consuming any and all information in order to feel on top of things. Now, for a brief moment, nothing's happening. There's nothing to read, nothing to consume, nothing to say.
And for the first time in months, I feel great. I feel motivated in a way that I can't really put into words, to just make every day count. Make the people I care about happier. Make myself happier. Make memories that don't involve staring at a screen reading all of the awful things happening. Things are always bad somewhere, but I can't affect them as much as I can my immediate vicinity.
The worse things get, the more important and effective the little moments of happiness in life are. My time is better spent trying to find, and maybe, if I can, make those moments happen. Otherwise I can't see how I can keep going. Continuing down the route I was before is going to end in apathy, and every part of my body is screaming at me that I can't let that happen. So I won't.
Hopefully it works.
I feel about the same. I've given up since 2016 and I've decided I wouldn't have children. I live my life spreading love everywhere I go and when shit like that happens, all I tell myself is I've done everything I could. I cannot fight a cult by myself nor can I win the information war.
It is what it is.
That takes strength to change your habits this much. Honestly, this seems like the healthiest possible way to deal with the outcome.
In 2016, I was absolutely shocked the next day. I remember going to bed nauseous. And then waking up in a daze. Driving to work in a daze. And being in a daze all day long. I remember asking myself, "What country am I in right now? Are these really my fellow Americans?" all day long. I even remember casting suspicions, privately to myself, about some of my admittedly awesome coworkers. "Did they vote for Trump? Did they do this?" Everyone was sus to me. Which wasn't a good place to be in.
But this time around, I'm more calm. Probably because we never really recovered from 2016. And even 2020 was just Biden barely eking out a victory. As such, this was always a possibility. Now it's just shaken out to be reality. It's not that surprising to me.
So I'm just sitting here drinking my coffee. Luckily I'm remote working today. I plan to do some work as I would any day.
I'm disappointed, certainly. Not sad. Maybe not yet. But I can already feel the anger starting to bubble a bit. Towards my fellow Americans. For what they've done, or perhaps didn't do. Again.
I was going to finish off with something more positive. But I feel like it'd just be me going through the empty motions. So yeah. I'll end it here.
This is where I am this year. I was stupidly hopeful in 2016 that it couldn't be as bad as everyone was saying it would be. Not this time - I'm terrified. Republicans hold the Presidency, the House, and the Senate. The only silver lining is that the Republican candidate for Governor was soundly defeated in my state.
They also hold the Supreme Court and much of the lower courts. This is all three branches of government.
Good to hear that you are doing better than 8 years ago!
I feel the same way. There is not any positive spin on this.
I barely got any sleep last night. At about 1130pm EST, I made the foolish decision to check progress. When I left off, things still felt close, but in hand. I saw how victory would be razor thin and immediately got out of bed and set up camp on the couch so I didn't disturb my wife.
I already knew the answer.
For the first time in my life, I understood the desire to want to find a solution to your problems at the bottom of a bottle. I turned on a long twitch for noise and laid the phone down out of reach. I decided to use that as a distraction for my intense desire to chemically drown my sorrows.
I'm not well but I have a strong support from my wife. I live in Canada now as well, so I won't be in the middle of the shitstorm, but living next door to it instead. It is sad to see the country I want to be proud of go beyond being a laughing stock and jump head first into fascism.
The next few years are going to be awful in a way that I just don't know how to quantify yet and I don't know how to mentally cope with it right now.
Well, not yet. Trudeau is going to get walloped next election, though, per polling. Polivre isn’t Trump, but isn’t that far off either.
I'm unfortunately well aware of this. Thankfully he hasn't given me the same fear of him blowing up everything yet. I'm hoping for several years of just ineptitude.
The man hasn't an idea of his own that isn't about playing political games or tearing somebody else down. At best, he's holding an amazing plan behind for the country behind all of the fronting, at worst (and most likely) he doesn't have a plan beyond tomorrow's politics.
It's true that he only cares about saving his own skin and lining his pocketbook. But it's his advisors and cabinet I'm worried about. A lot has changed in the MAGA world since his first term, and there is now a whole political apparatus waiting in the wings to get their hands on the wheel.
That hits all too hard for this Alberta resident. Danielle just got a 91% approval rating from her party for all of the backward stunting she's been up to.
I think I could have written this, especially the desire to start drinking. So you are not alone. If that was any solace? I just don't know.
Distraction helps me a lot too - it is an actual strategy taught to me in group therapy earlier this year. I do fear though, that I (maybe we?) will disappear into too many distractions and too much escapism. I miraculously managed to go outside today to get groceries, and while not entirely comparable to alcohol, I ended up buying chips, chocolate, and candy to eat for dinner. Haven't done that in around two months. Anyway, I hope that Canada remains a safe place for you and your wife.
I'd argue that we (collectively) already have the moment we began carrying smartphones. If anything, I'm hopeful that GenZ's interest in dumb phones creates a backlash to distraction lifestyles - the same kind of backlash that my generation had against the automatic belief in God.
I’m still in shock. I know it’s bad. I don’t feel anything other than surprise right now.
It took a long time but I got off of recommendation-style social media and just in time for this new presidency. Reddit ruled my thumbs and free time from 2016 to 2020 with outrageous content. I can’t let that happen again.
I just got a new job at a startup and I don’t know what their political leanings are, it’s at the forefront of my mind this morning. I’m trying not to catastrophize or make predictions. I hope they’re not interested in talking politics. I don’t want to experience that feeling- knowing the people who’ve given me an amazing career opportunity have deeply different morals than me.
My wife is experiencing emotions faster than me. I can’t keep up with trying to console her. She wants to leave the country. She means it. We can’t afford it. She’s had bad luck with health issues. The type of healthcare that’s at risk now more than ever.
I want to lash out, say awful things about these awful people. I fear retribution for my words though. What if someone connects any one of my online accounts to my identity, reports me to current or future employers for unsavory comments? What if someone I trust screenshots a private message and shares it with a deplorable community, who then doxx and harass my family?
Speaking of family, how do you sit down and have thanksgiving dinner with so-called Christians who voted for this? If anyone should confront these people it should be me, right? We’re family. They need to hear reason. But it’s fruitless.
It all makes me so sick, man. I was more numb when I started typing this comment. But now I feel awful.
My so-called Christian family has already contributed to such a rift that I no longer have to worry about that. I used to sit in the corner and bite my tongue for the entire long weekend, but starting in 2016 it was no longer possible. I've lost all contact with my extended family and have only strained and infrequent relations with my parents and brother.
To be honest, I don't miss it. They can have their bigotry and hatred, I don't need them. All of my life they tormented me for being different than them, they're not family to me.
I'm happy to live on the opposite side of the country from them in the most liberal city in possibly the most liberal state. I consider all of the people that they love to hate to be my new family, even if they're only acquaintances that I see in public.
That sounds awful. Hope that you can one day get a found family.
Luckily I’m a bit of a loner by choice, so I’m comfortable with it. I love my new community and have made a lot of awesome friends.
If there's somewhere you can get a visa to, leaving the country might be a lot cheaper than you think. The vast majority of the money we spent was bringing our cats with us. I know it's a drastic thing to consider for a lot of other reasons, but if money is tour primary concern, maybe I can give you some helpful tips.
I can’t leave my friends and family behind. I could move to Canada to stay in the same timezone, but the north sucks. I don’t know anything about the politics of any countries outside the US either. It’s not something I can do unless I’m forced.
I fully understand. I see you.
Any pride I had in this country is gone, and I wish to leave. I am numb.
Americans were the original anti-fascists. Why did we fall so far?
Where did the fash get many of their ideas from? The US has played both roles.
I'm Canadian. I'm a straight white male and I'm so disappointed in "my people". For all the hand ringing, it's my people who voted for Trump in mass. Trump will win by a bigger percentage than Hitler and the threat is better known.
I don't know man. I took a sick day to stay home with my wife who is understandably taking it worse than me. I'm just numb at this point. I have American family. Some of them almost certainly voted for Trump. I'm terrified for my American neighbours. I'm terrified because my country will almost certainly follow suit and while PP is not as bad as Trump that is an incredibly low bar.
I had never seen that before. Higher percentage than Hitler.. jfc..
I'll need to look up who this Canadian politician is because I keep seeing him mentioned today - in any case, I hope you and your wife find ways to cope with things.
Pierre Poilievre, again not anywhere near as bad as Trump, but will almost certainly be the next PM of Canada due to Canadians binging on American news and conspiracies.
And thank you.
Basically acting on empty today. I don't think that's a phrase yet, but I'm pretty sure that most understand what I mean. I'm just going through the motions to take things day by day.
I'm worried about the EU and Ukraine. Ukraine may well be fucked completely. The EU, well, who knows really. I wouldn't be surprised if the Union will crash in the aftermath of whatever the fuck Trump is going to do and the wave of the far right.
Then there are my many American friends who may not survive this presidency one way or another.
My only hope is that Trump will fuck things up so much that maybe the USA will reform. But for all we know that'll end up with a one party system instead. Defacto or official.
Well, make sure to vote in the midterms. That’s one way to limit the damage. Otherwise is it, what it is.
I can't think of election results I've dreaded more than these. Part of me is glad it's over, but most of me is fearful for what our country will become over the next 4 years. I feel like the best thing for my mental health will be to give up news and social media. I already did away with Facebook years ago, Reddit last year and Twitter recently.
But I know reading about what the leading politicians do over the next 4 years is only going to make me angry. I like to stay informed on what's going on in the world, but now I have to balance that with being pissed off every time I read the news. At least here, I can mostly block out politics with tags and such, but I don't want to rely solely on this website for news.
I'm just sad.
I'm taking small comforts in things. I get to see Taiwan one more time at least before everything goes to shit. I live in a blue state along with most of my friends and loved ones. My best friend married his now wife a month or so ago so she doesn't have to worry about visa stuff at least.
I'm just sad, disappointed and scared.
I'm left wondering what a Trump presidency might mean for Taiwan. During his first term, some considered him an ally due to his feud with China, but I expect he'd sell out for a chance to build a hotel in Beijing or something equally self-serving.
At this point, who knows. I'm going back next month to see friends and family, but then... we'll see.
My dog woke me up at 3 am to go out and I checked my phone when I returned to bed. I see the race has been called. I'm not surprised. I think I'll probably be able to go back to sleep. My main issue is going to be that I DO NOT want to spend the day talking about this. It's exhausting. It's not worth the mental energy. I'd rather take the hits as they come than spend mental energy thinking about what this will mean for the next four years or more. If anything, this may have weirdly boosted my creative drive. If I can feel like I'm doing something worthwhile for myself, and not get into the doom, I'll probably be decent.
I live in Washington. Generally speaking, I'll be fine. I'm pretty sure I'm going to end up spending a lot of energy convincing my parents that they will also be fine (they live here too), along with my fellow female coworkers. We will be fine. I think the person most likely to freak out is my male coworker, honestly, and I don't really know what to do to help him other than tell him that I hear him.
I dread learning anything about situations internationally and in other states over the next four years, though. Again, I won't be surprised. But I did my part. And I did my spiraling when Roe was overturned and when they tried taking away access to mifepristone. I'm over this. Maybe I'll finally have the juice to write the sequel to my novel. (I spent 2016-2018 editing and formatting the first one - maybe the election at that time helped with that, lol).
It's just about 5 now. Time to try to catch another hour before work. And facing the public, with whom I work. They'll probably have a lot to say today.
I don’t know if blue states will be fine. They’re talking about nation-wide abortion bans and military assassinations of political opponents.
Choosing to think we'll be fine (for the moment anyway) is helpful to me. I'm choosing not to spiral into a negative thought pattern because that's what will be most beneficial for me right now. In any case, I've been surgically sterilized, so at least I don't have to worry about being killed by a miscarriage or being jailed because of one.
This is kind of where I'm at.
What's done is done and I'm not feeling like I can worry about things anymore. I hope everything turns out fine in the long run, I do fear for my children, but that's a constant concern either way.
Facts are facts and I cannot change them, so I'm going to continue on as I did yesterday and the day after, the day after.
Similar feelings here. Not surprised but disappointed and kind of numb to it all. Also living in a PNW state so I’ll probably be ok.
Prior to this I had been working on various avenues of self-improvement both for myself and to advance plans to have another country as a plan B. I’ll probably lose myself in that work now to try to stay sane.
Having your creative drive boosted is definitely a weird side effect of it! I can actually relate, too. I've not been doing well (for other reasons than the election - it just added to it) and it has made me want to pick up drawing again after like 10 years, as well as pick embroidering back up. I'm even planning to go to the library to create vinyl stickers and stuff like that.
Anyway I do hope that it will help you to have this outlet, and good to hear that you live in a state that is generally fine - and hope you got some rest!
Nice! I hope your endeavors help you. I had been having the inkling for the last month, and it went away for a couple weeks while I was dealing with some other awful stuff, but now it's back and feeling pretty strong. I want to get back into writing after like 6+ years of a dry well (I've been doing digital art in the meantime, but I think that might be dry now).
Feeling some serious despair today. I actually managed to sleep last night because I was so tired, but when I woke up too early, I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep until I checked the results, and then of course I couldn't sleep any more after that. I started rotating between different issues and problems this will cause the country and the world, each time just feeling more and more despair. And then I turned to the environment--the issue that was pretty much ignored throughout all of the campaigning yet the one that is actually most important--and again predicted destruction and felt even worse.
Part of me is glad that we have a clear picture of what the U.S. wants. "America has," indeed, given "an unprecedented and powerful mandate." I'm terrified of what that means. Trump and company and their plans are seriously insane. I take some solace in the hope that I'm wrong. And I didn't tell my 7 year-old son this morning about the result, and he was happy as ever, starting to read a Captain Underpants book. I'll do my best to shelter him from this despair and just hope that he barely notices. I'm also comforted to be a white, straight dude. But I don't only care about myself, so that isn't a whole lot of comfort. Plus it doesn't take long to realize I'm not a normal white, straight dude.
Here's hoping that I can stop feeling this doom and get some work done today. I work from home, alone, and talk to no one all day. It's a kind of depressing lifestyle on a normal day, but worse today. But as usual I'll pull up my emotional bootstraps and get through the day. Good luck to the rest of you trying to do the same.
The consequences for the environment and climate is probably the worst thing about the election in the long run. It is not an immediate danger though, nor is it a winning issue for the Democrats. I think that's why it has taken the backburner a bit - the first and foremost danger is to minorities and the increased likelihood of wars around the world.
Emotional bootstraps lol, that's a good one. We will all get through the day somehow, yes, but i agree that there is little comfort to be found.
Thanks, I don't know where that came from, just stream-of-consciousness I guess. But it worked, I pulled myself together and got some work done. Not as much as I should've, but I think that's acceptable today!
Feeling a little better just thinking about the average voter. They're not voting for the next Hitler/someone who wants to destroy the country, they just think their situation was better under Trump (I don't know how, but whatever) and I guess believed him when he said he knew nothing about Project 2025. And they will resist if he truly goes over the top.
Our family is the typical poster child of white nuclear families. I hate that this may be a survival strategy and I shudder to think of all the unnecessary pain others will experience because they were born in even slightly different circumstances.
I have 2 children and this wake-up call has me wanting to spend as much time with them as possible. I'm so scared of what their future looks like despite living in a solid blue state. If all that was feared comes to fruition, nowhere is safe. This morning in a haze, I was dancing with my 3 year old to distract myself but the motions made me break down and I did what I could to hide it even though my babies may need to grow up sooner than they should.
How can I keep them safe? My only plan going forward is to turn onward and build a community of trusted friends and family. I commiserated with another parent who is agonizing about the future. It helped a little connecting with her but I am terrified.
I'm feeling too spent to say much. I didn't sleep at all last night. I just want to say thank you to the many wonderful folks who have written what we are all feeling right now. I'm glad you all exist. We're going to need one another more than ever in the coming years.
I'm so spent too. I can speak for everyone here, I think, and say I'm glad you exist too!
Been chatting with a Texan lady online recently who is absolutely scared of Trump and went out of her way to vote Harris yesterday. I can't imagine how she's feeling about the result, especially after I encouraged her to vote by bringing up the possibility that Texas could swing blue, based on the last few years results.
She's someone who caught feelings for me, but I feel awkward because of the distance. It's tough because we're 4500 miles away and neither of us can really emigrate to each other's country that easily (USA & UK.)
I can hardly imagine being a Ukrainian this morning.
Yesterday I knew in my bones this was coming. After voting as soon as the polls opened, I went home and was worthlessly miserable the rest of the day. I'm already pre-grieved. My state was no different after I woke up and read the news.
This may be the worst thing I have ever said, but it seems to sum up the state of my head right now: being released from hope can constitute its own freedom. I skipped breakfast, dressed in black, went in to the office to work. The mood here, except for one woman who irritated the hell out of me in a morning meeting by her cocaine-like aggressive cheerfulness, is uniformly sober and businesslike.
Today, I'm embracing the sobriety. I don't see the future. I don't even see a future, it's all gone. Well, personally I'll be okay, I have some money and am not far from retirement. But my kids? The rest of the world? I can think of no plans, no repairs, no escape routes; this reality cannot be denied. I'm just in it with the rest of you and am going to feel what I feel.
I'll add that donating to the Ukranian defense fund just now gave me the only moment of good feeling I've had in this miserable day, making the observation not off topic in the least.
This post by Chuck Wendig sums up a lot of my feeling. It was cathartic to read and know others feel the same. https://terribleminds.com/ramble/2024/11/06/this-is-a-doom-post/
Thanks for sharing this! I definitely see myself in a lot of that.
I didn't fall asleep until almost 7 AM ET. Slept three hours. Woke up and shed a couple of my "liberal" tears. About 30 minutes ago I walked across the street to get coffee. Barista asked how I'm doing. I mustered a sigh and shook my head. He and the other barista acknowledged they are feeling the same way. I ordered and almost teared up again waiting for my coffee and apple galette.
This hurts. I'm disgusted, sad, angry, and probably some other things. Definitely feels like the majority of voting Americans are traitors.
I imagine if they get the house it'll feel like the last nail in the coffin. I am concerned.
Thankful I have therapy later this afternoon.
I feel sick. I'm in Florida and I originally grew up here -- I feel a deep connection with this land, but not with its people. I'm so bitterly disappointed how red it's become here, when everything that comes out of Trump's mouth shows us who he really is and how far he's willing to go. DeSantis hasn't hidden anything about himself either. The cruelty and inhumanity is staggering.
I still think there's hope for the distant future, but it's feeling more distant all the time. This wave of dangerous ultra-conservatism is a response, I think, to a couple of decades' worth of hard-won civil rights and the increasing visibility of people who are Different from them. Though the fight for civil rights has been going on much longer than that, it's now become impossible to ignore for the people who'd rather it stay tucked away, where they don't have to think about it. I see genuine anger and resentment when a movie has a gay character or when a commemorative coin depicts Lady Liberty as a Black woman. Those who are being oppressed will continue to push back, as they have done this whole time, but with renewed desperation and increased participation. I think more people will have their eyes opened as fascism keeps taking hold, especially once the leopards start to eat their faces, but the cost is so great. I'm so afraid for how many will keep losing rights, freedoms, medical care, safety, and in the end, their lives.
I really had hope for this time. In the semi-rural area where I live, we'd been afraid to put up any political signs because of the fear for our own safety and property. But not too far away from us, there was a property with an eye-catching and solidly custom-built Harris-Walz sign, proudly standing next to the street, with no ill effects that we ever saw. I thought the tide was turning, but it wasn't. I feel beaten right now. But at some point, I'll have to remind myself that hope is something you must keep choosing to wield.
Edited to add: I was a little too exhausted by the end of posting this to expand on that last link, which, after reading through some of the other replies here, realize may have been a mistake. I know it probably looks like an insipidly inspirational social media post, but I think this one has merit. I don't want to tell people to "just have hope", especially right now when that would be downright offensive. I don't have hope right now. I just know that at some point, in the future, I'm going to have to pick myself up and continue the struggle, because what other choice have I got.
I feel bad because my thinking right now is probably not palatable with a lot of folks on here. I mostly lurk, especially when it comes to politics, but I know most regulars here are bigger people than I. When sentiments lean... aggressive, there's always someone here to remind us that such sentiments do not help anyone. I'm trying not to think these things because I know people I respect greatly - internet strangers here, my partner, my friends - don't accept stooping to the same level of hate for the "other".
But I don't know, man. I feel like a fool for having empathy in general and I feel like the only way to retain some form of agency is to stop caring, particularly about people who most certainly do not care about me (and even wish me actual harm depending on where their views lie regarding sexuality and childbearing as a "duty"). That's not even a real coping mechanism though, because I'm the one with the good grace to have been born and raised in a liberal city in CA - barring some truly worst case scenarios, a lot of things just won't affect my day to day the same way it will for those living in different areas who rightfully are fearing for their safety and freedom to exist. And complacency and apathy are exactly what allow fascism to thrive. I realize that.
Idk, I'm just trying not to let the very antisocial, people-hating part of me run the show too much.
I don't really know what to do. I've got dual-citizenship with Canada, so I can just leave easily enough, but I can't just leave behind my girlfriend, and I've got student loans to pay so I can't easily leave without a job. I can sponsor my girlfriend to move to Canada but she doesn't have a job there either, obviously, so yeah. I don't really know. I'm just so sad and scared right now.
Anyways, if anyone knows any decent immigration lawyers in Canada let me know, I guess?
Also... we fucking re-elected Ted fucking Cruz in Texas?!? BY A LOT! THIS MAN LITERALLY LEFT US FOR A VACATION WHILE PEOPLE FROZE TO DEATH AND WE RE-ELECTED HIM! I don't know what else to say.
Texas...not even once.
Not that I ever thought "Blexas" was going to happen this year (or maybe any year), you would think that some of these awful Texas reps would face some repercussion due to their actions or inactions. But nope.
I'll join team sad and scared.. big hugs.
fwiw, if you're on an income-driven repayment plan, the income-driven plan is based off your taxable income, which is after foreign-earned income exclusions are applied. Obviously you'll still need a job to have income to live off of, but if you do end up moving feel free to DM me. Student loan payments are easier to avoid if you're living abroad and plan to stay abroad.
Ah, thanks. Right now I'm just on the standard plan because I can afford it for the loans in my name, but I guess if I moved then it sounds like switching plans would be a good idea.
I do also pay the much higher amounts for the Parent PLUS loans my mom took out for me... but my grandma passed away and left me enough that I should be able to just pay those off (or at least the vast majority of them).
I also am lucky enough to have friends in Montreal who would gladly let me stay with them for free at least temporarily. Anyways, I'm digressing but thanks for that info, I'll try remember to DM you if I do move and have questions about the loans!
Best of luck wherever you end up staying!
This is a weird thread to read. Both harrowing and comforting in some fashion. I live in Denmark so not directly affected by this, so all my sympathies to across the pond. I just cannot shake off all the speculations on the wider ramifications of a second Trump presidency. I know it is pointless to worry about things that is basically just still guesses, and I wish I had my wife optimism on "how bad could it get". Because objectively she is right, that the last time Trump was president, it didn't really affect us personally. But I feel like it is more than just random speculation now with what this means indirectly for global climate policy, Putin's increased appetite for attacks on NATO and the general rise of right wing politics. We also have our share of political parties that are outright copying Trump's catchphrases. Not to the same effect yet thankfully, but there are certainly people out there with the intent to sow the same sort of distrust in the population. I also have two daughters, so I am worried about the general rise in misogyny that is connected to all this. I know I am piling on many different issues that Trump alone isn't directly responsible for, but he is the symbol of this sort of ideology that is getting a foothold in many different forms and different groups are trying to copy his playbook.
If the next 4 years are a wake up call to anyone it will be a call to those that didn’t vote. MAGA is in another world. They’ll tell themselves that they made the right choice as things burn down. But the remaining large chunk of the voting population needs to understand that you vote like your life depends on it. You don’t tune out politics and refuse to even drive to a poll or turn in a ballot. I think enough people aren’t enchanted by Trump and would have voted for his opposition if forced to choose. But they weren’t forced to choose. Perhaps 4 years of descent into fascism is enough to force them.
And in the meantime I hope we mobilize on the ground. I don’t want to remember lying in my bed when the military was first turned on American civilians. Trump has directly threatened to assassinate certain Democrats. We will need to show up in person and demand normalcy.
My queer and trans students are struggling. And I mean, so am I still.
I just keep repeating that we will survive, we will become Queer Elders, we will not let Trump/Mitch McConnell/Vance/whomever outlive us...
I'll repeat it forever if it keeps them from quitting
Im not too broken up about it, I always knew this was a possibility and the last couple weeks everyone was saying it was like 50/50, so I had already mentally come to terms with it.
I cant necessarily say Im surprised. Ive been feeling very worn out and put off of politics and the way the discourse has evolved these last few years, so Im not completely surprised to see that lots of people didnt end up turning out to vote. I mean, that happens every year, but it feels more understandable this year. Public discourse just feels really exhausting and unfulfilling nowadays. Which for some people might have translated into them being uninspired to do their civic duty, despite how dire everything appears to be.
I hope that people can take a step back and see that something needs to change here, and we need to find new ways of connecting with the public that reignites the political passions of the disaffected rather than doubling down on what the last 10 years have been.
While I'm surprised and disappointed, I am not as shocked as I was in November 2016.
I'll mostly just hope for the best and focus on things within my control like eating well, exercising, getting good rest, nurturing positive relationships with those around me, and keeping busy.
Hopefully we'll still have elections in 2028 and things can normalize. The pendulum feels like it has swung completely in the wrong direction, but hopefully things won't be as bad as I think.
I guess like everyone else, I'm still in the phase where I just took the blow.
It hasn't sunk in yet.
It feels like a gut punch, but the negative ruminations haven't fully kicked in which is the next stage.