• Activity
  • Votes
  • Comments
  • New
  • All activity
  • Showing only topics with the tag "ask.advice". Back to normal view
    1. Aquarium: centre piece for 160l/40 gallons community tank

      Hi, I have a planted tank of 160L/about 40 US gallons. I had a few problems and want to get a center piece fish, but I also want to ask what might've gone wrong with my betta's. So this is a long...

      Hi,

      I have a planted tank of 160L/about 40 US gallons. I had a few problems and want to get a center piece fish, but I also want to ask what might've gone wrong with my betta's. So this is a long post, sorry. I'll put a tl;dr in the end.

      Currently there are 6 celebes rainbowfish, 2 hillstream loaches (P. Myersi), a whole bunch of bronze corydoras (they had offspring, ~12 fish), and 4 amano xl shrimps.

      No ammonia and nitrites, I did get way too high nitrates but that's more and more under control (~50ppm now). The filter is a Sicce Whale 350 and there are two bubblers (Eheim 200 split in two bubblers IIRC). Temperature is about 25-26°C (77-79F).

      I used to keep a singular betta in the tank with the cories and celebes, but I have had the worst luck with them. Three died in about 1.5 years. One disappeared while I was on vacation, so I don't fully know what happened (family came to check up on them, but they were also perplexed). The second one was sickly from the start and kind of wasted away with clear dropsy at the end.
      The third one got stuck in a little glass vase I put on the glass with an anubia pinto plant. I got him out but he was barely alive, and although he seemed to slowly get better he eventually died of dropsy (but without clear signs of infection) in the end too.

      My current working theory is that the tank is too busy, but as long as the betta is healthy it's fine. Yet betta's can't be fine all the time, and my nitrate spikes didn't help of course.

      I also don't give the bigger betta pellets as the main feed anymore since the last one died of dropsy without clear signs of infection (I still have a betta in another 70l/20 gallon planted tank with shrimps), but I'm not fully sure if that's a factor that really mattered. Still, I feel like they can disrupt the digestion (especially since I tend to give too much of it) (I try not to).

      I also tend to go for calmer betta's in the LFS that will probably not mess too much with my other fish in the community tank, but the second one was in retrospect too calm and hidey.
      In theory they like almost still water, but I have a lot of resting places (esp near the surface), choose betta's with smaller fins and keep an eye out that they don't get thrown around in the tank.

      So I'm looking for a centre piece fish with lots of personality, but who will most likely leave my other fish alone. I can return them to the LFS if it doesn't really work out, or if they don't need much space I have a 30l quarantine tank running in the background. So I can manouvre if it doesn't work out, but still.

      I tried honey gourami's, but my Celebes fish were scared of them and only stayed between the plants. They were also quite dominant actually. I'm pretty sensitive about agression in my tank.

      I'd love to just get another betta, but I don't want to guinea pig one after another till I perhaps find out my tank truly is too busy for them.

      Tl;dr: want another fish in stead of betta's, that can handle other busybodies but doesn't dominate. No honey gourami's or livebearers please.

      17 votes
    2. Outdoor office build, ideas and tips please

      I'm in England, this is going to matter with this. My wife's business has outgrown a small office space. She does HTV clothing and accessories, mugs, etc. Basically, personalised vinyl and...

      I'm in England, this is going to matter with this.

      My wife's business has outgrown a small office space. She does HTV clothing and accessories, mugs, etc. Basically, personalised vinyl and sublimation. The equipment she uses is large, A3 printers, dye cutter (Cricut but about to get an A2 bad boy) and probably an A2 printer too.

      I've been looking for 5m squared log cabins and similar. Something like this would be an ideal shape. One wall, floor to ceiling, will be dedicated to storage of vinyl, mugs, t shirts, etc. hence thinking there's no point in going A frame style.

      I'm assuming 15cm deep concrete base by whatever size the cabin will be, squared, plus 30cm to make sure the base is big enough.

      Thoughts?

      Do I build something myself or spend out on the Lego cabin style everyone seems to be selling in 44mm timber? Do I put in the base and build my own cabin around it using straight timber and sheet materials from merchants?

      There's two main factors for me, cost and insulation. As she's using it for storing clothing it needs to not get damp so it'll need to be a good material and probably will need a dehumidifier in and on all year round when the door is closed. Do I sheet in layers with insulation foam?

      Anyway, you get the idea. Links and general advice is welcome.

      14 votes
    3. DMing my first session of D&D 5e tomorrow night

      Some brief backstory that is super common, I'm sure. I played 5e with some friends before the pandemic and that broke the group up, of course. Then our DM moved away so we've been without D&D...

      Some brief backstory that is super common, I'm sure. I played 5e with some friends before the pandemic and that broke the group up, of course. Then our DM moved away so we've been without D&D since 2019 or so. I was recently nominated to be our DM because none of us knows how to do it and they all thought I'd be a good fit. Which is great because I love world-building, playing characters, and writing stories.

      But I'm nervous because I was barely competent at playing the game to begin with (aside from getting into character), let alone DMing it. The whole group was, really. Because of the pandemic we're effectively all starting over as new players. So I've got a forgiving group to DM, that's for sure.

      To help me out, I bought the Essentials Kit and am building our first couple of sessions around that, albeit it pretty heavily modified. I kept the setting and one quest, but already created a custom quest with a mini-dungeon for them. Also managed to inject my favorite played character as the central giver of quests and backstory within the game. Sir Lord Craymond Zephyrson Ponce IV, former heir to Ponce fortune and originator of the Ponce-y Scheme. Think foghorn leghorn meets 1800s railroad tycoon meets Trump. Not a nice man at all.

      Honestly I started modifying the pre-built way quicker than I expected. My original plan was to play it by the book for the first couple of nights, but ideas kept popping in my head and I just ran with it. Then I started creating a windmill out of popsicle sticks and tiny rocks. I think DMing might be a gateway drug to greater creativity expressed through arts and crafts!

      Our first session is tomorrow night and I've been feverishly writing complicated notes in OneNote. I've got a notebook for each session. Then a section for The main outline, quests, NPCs, locations, encounters. Then pages for each individual item under that category. Then I'm using the nifty "Link to Paragraph" tool to let me quickly jump between pages. Here's a screenshot to show what I've put together -- https://imgur.com/a/yA6IYUJ I think eventually, after a few sessions, the notes will be more condensed, giving way to more improvisational storytelling. Between chatGPT and old fashioned generator sites that can crank out NPCs, dungeons, encounters, etc. I think it'll be a lot easier if I can work toward just having a simple outline for a given session and let the tooling and my imagination do the rest on the fly.

      Anyway, any general advice for a new DM?

      33 votes
    4. Tips for moving to a new country?

      For the first time in my life, I'll be living somewhere other than my hometown— going half the world away to London! Having never moved further than like an hour away from where I grew up, I'd...

      For the first time in my life, I'll be living somewhere other than my hometown— going half the world away to London!

      Having never moved further than like an hour away from where I grew up, I'd love to hear about experiences, tips, things to keep in mind when moving to a totally new place. Anything centred on London/the UK is of course very welcome, but I'm also really into hearing from people more generally :)

      42 votes
    5. How are you actually supposed to network / LinkedIn?

      I've been having a particularly rough time finding a new job in the field I graduated in. I'm doing pretty much everything most job sites have told me but networking is kinda hard. I don't...

      I've been having a particularly rough time finding a new job in the field I graduated in. I'm doing pretty much everything most job sites have told me but networking is kinda hard.

      I don't currently work in my field so I don't know anyone that would be particularly useful. Everyone I know is already aware of my situation and some of them have even found leads for me but no luck yet.

      I have gone to events related to organizations I'm interested in and spoken to people there but it feels super weird to just approach people and tell them I'm looking for a job.

      Similarly Linkedin is super foreign to me. This post is literally the most I've ever interacted with a social media site. What do I do once I open that app? Am I supposed to just stalk people on there that might hire me someday? I tried joining a "group" but it's been pending for a week now.

      59 votes
    6. Seeking advice and resources for keeping chickens

      I'm sad to admit it, but several members of my household have a crippling egg addiction and all our local suppliers are getting pretty stingy with prices. So we're breaking into the supply chain...

      I'm sad to admit it, but several members of my household have a crippling egg addiction and all our local suppliers are getting pretty stingy with prices. So we're breaking into the supply chain and getting the good stuff right at the source

      But seriously, looking to get some chickens soon and it's been difficult finding spesific details. Most of the resources I see either paint chickens as exceptionally easy and self sufficient, or details extremely technical info for business farmers. Just based on the info I can put together, I'm building a small coop (2.5m^2) and fencing a run that can extend out to about 10m^2. Think it should be enough for 5 or 6 birds and I'll line the house out with plenty of straw and make a little nesting nook. I'll need to let them out in the morning, feed them grain and kitchen scraps, close them up at night and keep a temporary pen for broody hens.

      Is that it? Do I have to get spesific breeds or types? Will it be better to raise them from young or just get fully grown? Temps range from -5C to 32C trough the year so do they need insulation or cooling? Are the eggs just safe to eat straight out the chicken? What are the best chicken pun names?

      Most importantly, are they good to keep around kids? My toddler has a very... enthusiastic love for animals but I know birds will not put up with her the way the cats or dog do. And is there any hygiene or parasite risks I need to be aware of?

      Would really appreciate any advice or anecdotes people have to share about these animals.

      35 votes
    7. How can I make a television "time machine"?

      The idea is simple: on any given day, I wanna know what TV show was on with new episodes 10, 20, or any number of years ago. To make it simple, let's restrict it to US television. The reasoning...

      The idea is simple: on any given day, I wanna know what TV show was on with new episodes 10, 20, or any number of years ago. To make it simple, let's restrict it to US television.

      The reasoning behind it is that shows were made with that expectation (they are not "binge friendly"), and it was wonderful to have a different show every day of the week. It was magical to be able to randomly catch Monk, E.R., The X-Files, The Pretender, Psych, Star Trek TOS, or Early Edition on TV. Hell, even Game of Thrones made a lot more sense when I had to wait a week before watching!

      So yeah, this is 100% about nostalgia. At least one day I week, I'm gonna watch whatever was on TV that exact day 10 to 30 years ago.

      I'm gonna choose a decade and start from there.

      But how could I do it, from a mechanical standpoint? I mean, where can I easily find the information of all the episodes that premiered on US TV exactly 10, 20, 30 years ago to the day?

      Additionally, any tips on finding obscure 80s and 90s TV shows?

      Thanks!

      Edit: what I want it is really nothing complicated, I just wanna know what was on any day of the week for the past 30 years. No automation required!

      12 votes
    8. New users: Ask your questions about Tildes here!

      This thread is officially retired. Please see the new version to ask any new questions. We have a lot of new users joining the site. Welcome to Tildes! This thread is for you to ask any question...

      This thread is officially retired. Please see the new version to ask any new questions.


      We have a lot of new users joining the site. Welcome to Tildes!

      This thread is for you to ask any question you have about the site, from “what is the moderation philosophy?”to “what does that blue line next to some comments mean?” to “what is the general vibe like here?” Tildes has a lot of documentation, history, and embedded social norms that can be daunting or opaque at first glance, so here’s your opportunity to get help with anything you need.

      Questions about anything and everything are fair game. Follow-up questions are encouraged! No question is too simple.

      Also, a quick note: the only person who can speak in any official capacity on Tildes is our admin @Deimos. Everyone answering who is NOT him is just a helpful community member!

      EDIT: To be clear, is perfectly okay to ask any question — even if you think it’s been asked before, or even if you didn’t search for an answer beforehand. There are an overwhelming number of comments here to sift through, so don’t worry about trying to read all of them. Just ask away, and someone will answer you!

      294 votes
    9. Have I by mistake "developed" a new chili pepper variety?

      A year ago I bought a bunch of chili seeds that I planted and then kind of left to its own devices on my balcony together with 3 other types of chili pepper. I watered the plants but I didn't give...

      A year ago I bought a bunch of chili seeds that I planted and then kind of left to its own devices on my balcony together with 3 other types of chili pepper. I watered the plants but I didn't give them any other love.

      Despite my negligence the plants thrived and some of the chili peppers developed a very particular appearance.
      Perhaps 1 out of 10 fully grown peppers kind of resembled a flower with petals around its base. They aren't suppose to look like that.

      https://i.imgur.com/Km2GFu3.jpg

      I saved the seeds from the largest and most distinct "flower chilis" and planted them to see if the odd appearance of the peppers would come back in generation 2...and so far 5 out of 5 developed fruits have the same flower appearance. Some only have 2-3 "petals" around the base of the fruit but some have 5-6.

      My four gen 2 plants have perhaps 60 more peppers in development (out of 100 flowers) and this year the gen 1 plant only have 2 out of 30 peppers that have the flower appearance.

      I have only found one pic on the internets of the same base variety that have a hint of a "petal" but none that look like mine.

      I know that new chili varieties aren't considered to be stable until gen 6-7 so I have more planting to do :) but which steps do I need to take to solidify the variety except replanting seeds and growing new generations?

      59 votes
    10. I'm finally biting the bullet and investing in laser eye surgery, anything I should know?

      I've done a large amount of research and got a consultation a few months ago, my doctor said I could get PRK as SMILE and LASIK weren't good options for my cornea. As I understand it the results...

      I've done a large amount of research and got a consultation a few months ago, my doctor said I could get PRK as SMILE and LASIK weren't good options for my cornea. As I understand it the results should be very similar, just a longer/more painful recovery time. I've got family who is going to come into town for a week to help me with anything, but I wanted to know if any of you have gone through PRK and had advice or an experience to share.

      43 votes
    11. Help with a home theater system issue

      Long story short my roommate has a surround system she got at Goodwill and I set it up for her but the internal amps are not functioning properly. It's only using the front two satellite speakers...

      Long story short my roommate has a surround system she got at Goodwill and I set it up for her but the internal amps are not functioning properly. It's only using the front two satellite speakers and sub which is independently powered. So it's 2.1 for now.

      The front two speakers barely put out much sound even cranked to max volume. The sub is fine as again it's independently powered.

      I've ruled out all settings, as there is a 2.1 output mode, and the radio is just as low so it's not an input issue. I have it hooked to her PC's output. I also have proper gauge speaker wire so that's not the problem either. I did hook up the center speaker to one of the front outputs too. Same deal.

      So can an inline amp help at this point? Is there anything else I can try or rule out?

      Also if this is not appropriate to post here in Tech I apologize in advance.

      5 votes
    12. How to read House of Leaves

      I'm wondering how to read this book. I'm about 2 chapters in, and I've read all of these footnotes/references to other material at the bottom of the page. So far, they basically mean nothing to...

      I'm wondering how to read this book. I'm about 2 chapters in, and I've read all of these footnotes/references to other material at the bottom of the page. So far, they basically mean nothing to me, and I think it was implied during the introduction that some of the footnotes are real and some of them are fake? Do they reference other parts of the book? Am I supposed to be flipping somewhere else in the book every time a footnote refences something? Or should I be going outside of the book to hunt down the references to read those? Is it worth it to try that if some are fake and some are real? Is there a wrong way to read this book? Can those footnotes/references be ignored sometimes or most of the time? Am I overthinking this and I should just keep reading normally without thinking about the footnotes?

      30 votes
    13. Graphics glitch on new install of Ubuntu

      So I have an old MacBook Pro (mid-2014) Core i5 which I've just installed Ubuntu 22.04.2 on. Most things are working fine but the screen randomly flickers and then goes black and then after...

      So I have an old MacBook Pro (mid-2014) Core i5 which I've just installed Ubuntu 22.04.2 on. Most things are working fine but the screen randomly flickers and then goes black and then after varying lengths of time will pop back on again. I've been googling around and found lots of instances of similar graphics glitches but can't quite find a solution.

      Any suggestions?

      7 votes
    14. How easy is it to change out parts on a watch?

      I see some nice watches that I like, but 80-90% of them are the silver/stainless steel color. I'm not sure why that color is so prevalent (probably the same reason 40% of new cars are white),...

      I see some nice watches that I like, but 80-90% of them are the silver/stainless steel color. I'm not sure why that color is so prevalent (probably the same reason 40% of new cars are white), maybe a lot of people love it but its not for me.

      Let's say I found a watch I really liked, but wanted the case/bezel/lugs (and of course the strap) to be black stainless steel. Is this something a jeweler or watch repair shop would be able to do?

      12 votes
    15. I am an extremely light sleeper, and need advice

      I just changed rooms, and my new neighbor makes noise. It's not much of a problem for other people, but I wake up at the slightest sound or the slightest change in lighting. Because of this, I am...

      I just changed rooms, and my new neighbor makes noise. It's not much of a problem for other people, but I wake up at the slightest sound or the slightest change in lighting. Because of this, I am not able to sleep properly. I have tried earbuds and earplugs, but they hurt my ears. Can you suggest how I can become a heavy sleeper? Or how to sleep in this environment?

      35 votes
    16. How do I migrate almost twenty years of email off of Gmail?

      I have followed numerous discussions on here lately regarding extracting oneself from being Google-reliant, and they've all deeply resonated with me. For years now I've been slowly migrating...

      I have followed numerous discussions on here lately regarding extracting oneself from being Google-reliant, and they've all deeply resonated with me. For years now I've been slowly migrating numerous Google-bound things over to my own self-hosted alternatives. I've moved my storage, contacts, documents, and some (but sadly not all) of my calendars to home solutions, fairly easily too.

      But the biggest hurdle I've been facing this whole time, the one I've been putting off the longest, is the act of figuring out how to get almost twenty years of mail archive and history on my primary account away from Google and into a space where I can access it separately. I have been steadily changing the main email on my more active external accounts to a self-hosted one, and now only seeing a shrinking handful of lesser-used services still attached to the old gmail. But that history is too precious to me, and I still find multiple occasions where I need/want to reference some communications from long ago.

      I've tried searching the web for options, but so far all combinations of my queries are either really elementary "here's how to set up a new email" crap, or else aimed at moving from one Gmail account to another Gmail account. I've been thinking that the simplest approach might be just to set it up as a POP3 account in my mail client (eM Client, for the record), download it all, and then when I finally pull the plug just drag it into the local client archive, and then remove the account from the app. But I figure there have to be others who have done this, right?

      74 votes
    17. How do I figure out what it is I want to do with my career?

      This week marks my 8th year of working in IT, and I have been feeling more and more that I am ready to move onto something different. Both my undergraduate and masters degrees were in the arts...

      This week marks my 8th year of working in IT, and I have been feeling more and more that I am ready to move onto something different. Both my undergraduate and masters degrees were in the arts (Japanese, and Linguistics respectively), and I just sort of fell into IT as a job because I was always good with computers and it seemed like it had a pretty great pay-to-effort ratio. Now that I am approaching the decade mark, I feel like it's not what I want to do any more. Even my current job (which I once described as my dream role) has lost its sheen, and the prospect of spending the rest of my working life having to study and learn new technologies, and keep up with the latest developments just fills me with dread. I don't want to be in my fifties and reading endless documentation to try and understand why MacJibbleGPT is now the preferred way to skilter a virtualised quallock. In short, I would like to relegate my computing to the level of "hobby."


      The problem is, I really don't know what I would like to do instead. The last time I had an idea of a career that I wanted to follow was as a teenager when I wanted to be a doctor, but I didn't get the grades. Since then I've just sort of fallen from thing to thing, and been a bit directionless, just assuming that IT would be enough to carry me through my working life, and focus on my hobbies for fulfilment. Well my hobbies are now very fulfilling, but they just make the slog of the work day even harder.

      So how do I go about figuring out what it is that I want to do? I have done a few quizzes online (via reputable organisations), I've contemplated the jobs of my friends and family, and I still just feel like nothing is inspiring me. There are a few problems that I need to try and work around with finding something new as well:

      • At least for the next 6 years or so, I am geographically fairly restricted to being within a reasonable driving distance to my daughter's home
      • Shit is expensive, so I need to minimise the hit to my salary
      • I do not have the money to get a degree or similar vocational qualification
      • I would like stable hours, and not to work weekends or evenings (this is more job-specific than it is career-specific)
      • Hybrid working is preferable to full-time in the office or full-time WFH (ditto)

      So I ask my fellow Tilderen, have you ever pivoted into a completely different career after several years of investing your time into another? How did it go? How did you go about figuring out what you wanted to do instead? What advice would you have for me, a nearly-31-year-old who still has most of her working life ahead of her?

      30 votes
    18. Strategies to manage ADHD

      I figured I would help kick off this new subgroup by starting a discussion on how people with ADHD try to manage it. I had a late diagnosis a couple years ago as an adult, and I have been working...

      I figured I would help kick off this new subgroup by starting a discussion on how people with ADHD try to manage it.

      I had a late diagnosis a couple years ago as an adult, and I have been working with a counselor to develop some behavioral techniques (in addition to medication). Not all of them stick, which in my experiences is the primary challenge of this disorder, but I've had good results when I do use them.

      Primarily, I have a calendar where I put reminders and plan things out. If I have parts of a project I need to get done, I lay those out and assign them to certain days of the week. Working in academia, I live my life a semester at a time and this helps me reevaluate certain goals and it feels reasonable to me to plan out a few months at a time.

      One thing I struggle with when it comes to planning is coming up with accurate estimates of how much time it might take to spend something. This was always a big obstacle in my way when it came to planning things out before - I wanted to know the exact time on how long it took to do something so that my schedule would be perfect. My counselor suggested that I come up with an initial estimate of how long something should take based off my intuition, and then double it (e.g. if I think a task should take 30 minutes, plot it out for 60 minutes of my day). This has been great for me because usually it's a win-win. Often, my initial assessment is underestimating how long something takes, so by accounting for slippage in time I can better chunk out my day. On the other hand, if I do get it done sooner I can pat myself on the back and I now have extra time in the day to get other things done.

      I wanna find better ways of trying to stay on track with habits. I've tried some different apps and none are working too well. Recently I picked up Sunsama which has helped in terms of reviewing the day and looking at subtasks, but as I've gotten busy with experiments I've kind of lost track of that. What are some things that you do to accommodate the way your brains works?

      61 votes
    19. Question about this plate I found at a yard sale

      I recently got this plate at a yard sale and was curious if anyone has any info on it I did some reverse google image search and couldn’t find much on it. I’m not sure if this is number 28 made...

      I recently got this plate at a yard sale and was curious if anyone has any info on it
      I did some reverse google image search and couldn’t find much on it.
      I’m not sure if this is number 28 made out of so many or number 28 in a set.
      If this is a set I’d like to track down the rest and collect them because look how cool it is!!
      I also apologize if this isn’t the right place to post as I’m fairly new to tildes.

      https://imgur.com/a/6eUt9We

      7 votes
    20. Stocks in a class action window

      So, if I have stocks that were purchased during the class window of a class action lawsuit, is it okay for me to sell them? It's not a large amount of money at stake here, but it'd also be nice to...

      So, if I have stocks that were purchased during the class window of a class action lawsuit, is it okay for me to sell them?

      It's not a large amount of money at stake here, but it'd also be nice to be able to recoup some of the losses I had due to the misleading information that caused me to buy the stock and ive filled out the forms but they didnt say anything about future actions just asked when i bought or sold any at the time of the suit. I am not sure if it's okay to sell them or if I should hold them.

      Any one have recommendations? This is US stock exchange, and if I did sell they'd be at a loss and I have sold other stocks at profit so I would be looking at capturing the losses on my taxes.

      3 votes
    21. Term deposits — are they worth it? At what point are they worth it?

      Now, rationally, I suspect the answer is "Of course!". But I'm looking for general advice, if my fellow Tildesians would be so kind. This question has arisen while investigating opening a Monzo...

      Now, rationally, I suspect the answer is "Of course!". But I'm looking for general advice, if my fellow Tildesians would be so kind.

      This question has arisen while investigating opening a Monzo account. Apparently, you can lock away some money for 12 months and get 5.3% AER interest on it - meaning for every, say, £1,000 I put in, I get £50 back, right?

      My question: is that really worth it, in the grand scheme of things? Even if I put in £10,000, I'd be locking myself out of that much money for a grand total of £500. I understand that's a lot to some people (even me), but it hardly seems worth it.

      Perhaps there's something I'm missing. Perhaps some bad maths on my part or some other type of interest that I don't know about. All advice is welcome and appreciated!

      21 votes
    22. How do you assess your "market value" for a niche role?

      I'm in a fortunate position of being in a reasonably well compensated but very specialised role in the pharma industry, and after some recent layoffs have been casually surveying what other...

      I'm in a fortunate position of being in a reasonably well compensated but very specialised role in the pharma industry, and after some recent layoffs have been casually surveying what other opportunities might be out there.

      However, I'm really struggling to get a sense of my market value, as little to none of the salary info on e.g. Glassdoor or published surveys from recruitment bodies captures anything similar to my position.

      My compensation is way off published ranges I can find, so I don't know if I have "golden handcuffs" or if the data I am looking to is garbage.

      In effect, my position developed organically over a few years, and has bits of middle management as well as governance, project management and individual contributor work. I don't think there is even anyone within my organisation with a similar role, I have several responsibilities which normally you wouldn't concentrate under one individual if you were designing from the ground up.

      I'd be really interested if anyone has been in a similar position, or any recommendations to on how to benchmark yourself when it isn't obvious what you should be benchmarking against.

      18 votes
    23. Vasectomy tips

      I had my 5th kid a few weeks ago and now have a vasectomy scheduled for early August. Any tips or suggestions for prep or recovery? They gave me some general advice regarding compression shorts,...

      I had my 5th kid a few weeks ago and now have a vasectomy scheduled for early August. Any tips or suggestions for prep or recovery? They gave me some general advice regarding compression shorts, ice, rest...

      Related question for those of you don't having kids or firmly decided against kids and didn't get a vasectomy: why not? I'm curious what methods you're using to prevent having kids.

      38 votes
    24. Dog's hearing loss

      I have an 8 year old blind silky terrier that seems to have all but lost his hearing after last night. I took him out last night and a neighbor unexpectedly set off fireworks. The display lasted...

      I have an 8 year old blind silky terrier that seems to have all but lost his hearing after last night. I took him out last night and a neighbor unexpectedly set off fireworks. The display lasted for about five minutes and he didn't seem scared. I moved him away, but not completely away.

      Since this morning he's been unresponsive to calls and sounds. He hasn't been wagging his tail much, has been bumping into the things in the apartment, and wasn't interested in his leash.

      I've got a vet appointment for tomorrow morning. Is there anything I can do to help? Is this a common occurrence? He's my first dog and he just seems so lost

      Update (copied from a comment):

      His hearing has been improving tremendously. The carprofen the vet prescribed helped a lot, IMO. He's able to hear about 80% as well as he could before, though it takes him a little bit to understand. At least until he takes his medicine, then he can hear a bit better.

      However, yesterday morning on his walk his front left paw started twitching and spasming uncontrollably. Poor guy was hopping around, could barely stand or even sit. He didn't seem hurt and there weren't any signs of injury (bee sting, bug bite, cuts, etc.). Took him to the emergency room immediately and they prescribed him some gabapentin. Fortunately the spasms went away and he's running and jumping around again

      20 votes
    25. Place to learn Japanese

      So,this has been on my mind for a long time and i have tried some available/widely known methods to learn japanese language.So far iam not satisfied with my results.Can someone suggest me some...

      So,this has been on my mind for a long time and i have tried some available/widely known methods to learn japanese language.So far iam not satisfied with my results.Can someone suggest me some ways that worked for them preferably for free/cheap.The main problem is the letters or characters.i can comprehend and manage to speak a very basic levels of the language mainly from consuming media from japan,some duolingo and such.....
      any and all advice is appreciated
      Help me out guys

      36 votes
    26. Hockey players off ice drills

      Let's try out this subgroup! I live in the Midwest, but I'm ~1hr from most rinks. I need to get better at all things hockey, but would love to not have to drive an hour each way and pay ~$20/hr...

      Let's try out this subgroup!

      I live in the Midwest, but I'm ~1hr from most rinks. I need to get better at all things hockey, but would love to not have to drive an hour each way and pay ~$20/hr for ice time.

      What can I do to improve at home? I've heard of golf balls for handling and passing, but do you have any specific drills that you do? I convinced my wife to get a stick and practice passing with me which has helped A LOT. What do you folks do to practice shooting? What about off ice skating drills?

      Videos, diagrams, and specifics would be very helpful.

      14 votes
    27. I want to prank a friend. Does anyone know where I can buy bulk bread clips?

      A friend and their partner got into a heated squabble about bread clips. My friend is a staunch defender of the clip; his partner prefers to tie the end of the bag into a knot. They recently...

      A friend and their partner got into a heated squabble about bread clips. My friend is a staunch defender of the clip; his partner prefers to tie the end of the bag into a knot. They recently bought a home together, and I would like to gift them a lifetime supply of bread clips. I'm unsure of the exact amount, but I'm thinking whatever amount is visually shocking would be good enough. Maybe 1000, maybe 10,000. I'm having trouble sourcing a suppler. Does anyone know of one? TIA

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bread_clip

      26 votes
    28. Where to donate used boardgames?

      Looking for recommendations or ideas of organizations that might appreciate some well-taken-care-of board games. They range in complexity from classics like catan to more complicated ones. My knee...

      Looking for recommendations or ideas of organizations that might appreciate some well-taken-care-of board games. They range in complexity from classics like catan to more complicated ones. My knee jerk reaction is Goodwill but I figured there were other lesser known orgs that might receive direct benefit from them instead.

      13 votes
    29. I'm from the Reddit exodus. I'm really liking it here. What should I know?

      What do you long term users want to share about the culture? What about growth plans? The erudite discussion with (presumably) real people is what I love most, but I miss the really niche subs....

      What do you long term users want to share about the culture?

      What about growth plans? The erudite discussion with (presumably) real people is what I love most, but I miss the really niche subs. That needs more people.

      I just want to make sure this isn't "eternal July".

      109 votes
    30. As a cis het white male, how do I better understand trans and trans issues?

      I'm pretty high on the cis het side of the scale, but I'm an understanding and individual freedom loving person. I believe "to each their own" and support that strongly. I'm an elder millennial....

      I'm pretty high on the cis het side of the scale, but I'm an understanding and individual freedom loving person. I believe "to each their own" and support that strongly.

      I'm an elder millennial. While we used LGB slurs casually, I never really meant them as slurs against the community. It's just how my peers spoke. Trans was never on my radar at the time. (Maybe a little, but I figured it was much rarer than it appears to be)

      Homosexuality was always easy for me to understand. From a particular instance: "Do you like girls, Jackie? (Nod). Me too. That's cool." End of need to understand. Plus it was about a butt, and a butt is pretty sex/gender nonspecific.

      I also always felt honored when people came out to me.

      I just feel like I'm having trouble empathizing with trans individuals. I cannot imagine myself in that position like I can with homosexual or asexual individuals. The pronoun thing also wracks my brain. I'm more accepting of "they" as an object, but "they" as a subject for an individual feels so horrid to me.

      First and foremost, I don't personally know anyone trans. I'm not sure how to change that without being weird.

      Thanks for your support in my learning!

      42 votes
    31. How does one draw in a community for their Minecraft server?

      I'm kind of withdrawn and I don't talk a lot but I want to curate a community of chill people to play with. I just started my server and I've got 3 people whitelisted, of which 2 have shown up and...

      I'm kind of withdrawn and I don't talk a lot but I want to curate a community of chill people to play with. I just started my server and I've got 3 people whitelisted, of which 2 have shown up and those two are family members. And one person who tried to join but wasn't whitelisted, but idk how they got the ip since they're not in the discord.

      I have around 300 subscribers where I posted the link, but only 3 people joined the discord (one being another subscriber, bc one of my family members hasn't accepted the discord invite yet but is whitelisted anyway bc duh). I'm just kind of feeling like the kid who invited his whole class to his birthday party but only 2 people showed up. I'm not sure what I've done wrong or if I missed an important step.

      16 votes
    32. How to get rid of wasps?

      I have wasps building hives under the eves on my house. I'm looking for a way to kill them without Raid or other harsh chemicals. Right now there seems to be about 10 hornets starting on this...

      I have wasps building hives under the eves on my house. I'm looking for a way to kill them without Raid or other harsh chemicals. Right now there seems to be about 10 hornets starting on this hive. I see a number of other places they've made hives around the house that were removed before we moved in. My current options that I've found so far are spraying with dawn soap/water/garden sprayer or peppermint. It seems a little too high to get a garbage bag around them easily before pissing them off. Any other good ideas?

      15 votes
    33. How to get better at visual design with desserts (both plated and bakery-style)?

      Over decades, it seems that there has been this evolving body of knowledge surrounding plating and presentation, which can only be absorbed fully, if you've spent several years at a high-end...

      Over decades, it seems that there has been this evolving body of knowledge surrounding plating and presentation, which can only be absorbed fully, if you've spent several years at a high-end bakery or fine dining restaurant (swooshing a sauce with the back of the spoon, quenelles, 3-dimensional whitespace, etc.).

      I'm an aspiring dessert artisan, and I'd like to get up to date on those principles, approaches, and techniques, without having to squirrel my way into the fine-dining lifestyle.

      Instagram and pictures in cookbooks are great for inspiration, but I feel like I would improve faster by understanding thought process/vocabulary, than from analyzing finished products.

      Any suggestions/advice/resources? (Most visual design books are too general imo)

      8 votes
    34. Would 'Insidious: The Red Door' be worth seeing if I've not seen the prior movies?

      I only have a vague familiarity with the franchise, does the film stand well on its own, or should I skip it? I have an AMC membership and hate to let tickets go unused if there is something...

      I only have a vague familiarity with the franchise, does the film stand well on its own, or should I skip it?

      I have an AMC membership and hate to let tickets go unused if there is something worthwhile playing, I wouldn't ordinarily consider it if I didn't have the extra tickets.

      5 votes
    35. Best way to share / integrate photos on Tildes

      Hey gang, I’m a rather novice / hedonist tildes user and have just been posting links to uploaded images by hosting them on ibb and then sharing https://ibb.co/PF5nFf9 https://ibb.co/10pV1wB...

      Hey gang, I’m a rather novice / hedonist tildes user and have just been posting links to uploaded images by hosting them on ibb and then sharing

      https://ibb.co/PF5nFf9
      https://ibb.co/10pV1wB
      https://ibb.co/1GgyWCT

      Is there a better place to host and better way to post images?

      Thanks in advance. Sorry for any eye rolls I may have caused!

      14 votes
    36. Resources on amount of noon sun for sufficient vitamin D production

      I have taken supplements, but they are not very effective. Honestly, I don't want to rely on medication when our bodies are perfectly suitable with enough sunlight exposure. I've been researching...

      I have taken supplements, but they are not very effective. Honestly, I don't want to rely on medication when our bodies are perfectly suitable with enough sunlight exposure.

      I've been researching this for a while and can't find sources that show the difference according to latitude. I stupidly didn't bookmark what I read so what I say is based on what I've read but can't link to any of it :(.

      • I gather there is research that around noon time sun exposure (e.g. 11am-3pm) results in greater production. The skin's processes are optimised for that time.
      • I am very aware of the risks of skin cancer.
      • I read in the UK about 13 minutes for 3 days a week, just between April and September is adequate for vitamin D levels year round.
      • I live on the tropic of cancer so I'm expecting perhaps 7-10 minutes. Anything specific to that sub-tropical latitude would be greatly appreciated.

      All advice is welcome, but links that I can read, compare and digest myself especially for different latitudes round the world would be perfect.

      18 votes
    37. Any cigar rollers in the house?

      I'm an avid cigar smoker and thought it might be a good hobby to pick up. Curious about a few of the aspects around doing it. How long does it take to roll a single cigar? 10 cigars? Is it that...

      I'm an avid cigar smoker and thought it might be a good hobby to pick up. Curious about a few of the aspects around doing it.

      How long does it take to roll a single cigar? 10 cigars?
      Is it that much cheaper?
      How much difference is there in each blend? Is it hard to mimic cigars you already like?

      6 votes
    38. MATLAB learning resources for software engineers

      I'm starting grad school in neuroscience/biomedical engineering soon, and one of my most dreaded parts of it is inevitably having to develop Matlab code. I understand why people use it -- it's...

      I'm starting grad school in neuroscience/biomedical engineering soon, and one of my most dreaded parts of it is inevitably having to develop Matlab code. I understand why people use it -- it's arguably best in class at a lot of engineering tasks, and the matrix-first approach of the language makes it very fast to prototype things if you think like a mathematician/engineer.

      However, the language also seems to actively discourage good software practices, and many frequently used scientific projects have atrocious code. Think python dependency management is bad? How about NO DEPENDENCY MANAGEMENT? Yes, that's right, the way you share code in matlab is by importing collections of loose files from github/matlab file exchange. The Matlab neuroimaging code that I have worked has also frequently abused the workspace to share state implicitly between scripts, which makes the code virtually incomprehensible. Instead of using packages to create namespaces, common practice is give function names a prefix and import them into the global namespace.

      I know there's multiple large companies that rely on Matlab for their products, so it must be doable; I just haven't seen it for myself yet.

      Do you guys have any experience developing in Matlab, and if so, are there any good resources to learn how to build robust software in it? What are some open source projects that have good Matlab code?

      16 votes
    39. Gravel bike on single track? Good idea or bad idea.

      So me and my wife have temporarily moved in with my parents to save up for a down payment (boy houses are expensive right now). Their house is in a more rural part of Arizona and they have a tons...

      So me and my wife have temporarily moved in with my parents to save up for a down payment (boy houses are expensive right now). Their house is in a more rural part of Arizona and they have a tons of trails and fire roads that I'm looking at riding when it gets cooler. I have a Canyon Grizl AL 6 with 45mm tires and a rigid carbon fork. The tires are set up tubeless and have pretty good dry grip so I think I should be fine and I would be less than 5 miles from a car accessible road at all times. I have under biked a bit before but not on a desert trail. I was curious if any riders here have any experience and/or advice for taking a gravel bike on single track.

      7 votes
    40. Recommended length of paternity leave?

      Hello, I’m soon to become a father to my firstborn child and have the opportunity to take some paternity leave through work. While the length of time I can take is very generous (as far as I...

      Hello,

      I’m soon to become a father to my firstborn child and have the opportunity to take some paternity leave through work. While the length of time I can take is very generous (as far as I know), I’m truly unsure how much is usually the norm for fathers.

      I work in a stable office job, while my wife is self employed and will be taking 3 months off. I am leaning towards taking the week after birth off and intermittently working from home afterwards as needed, as even with leave I would most likely not receive my full 100% pay, which we will definitely need. In addition to the financial impact, my daily work usually consists of stuff that my coworkers would be unable or struggle with staying on top of, and I do not want to put any extra burden on them, or have tasks not completed merely to back up until my return.

      Any advice or comments would be much appreciated as I am struggling to figure this out!

      37 votes
    41. Help me prep food provisions for a sailing trip

      In a few weeks I'm participating in a three(ish) day nonstop sailing regatta. My friend and I have been put in charge of making and bringing food and drinks for the entire crew. We also have no...

      In a few weeks I'm participating in a three(ish) day nonstop sailing regatta. My friend and I have been put in charge of making and bringing food and drinks for the entire crew. We also have no idea what we are doing, so any advice would be appreciated!

      My first thought is sandwiches/wraps but for morale I think it would be nice to have a variety of things.

      We won't have a kitchen/stove/way to heat the food. No fridge, but a cooler full of ice. (It will probably not remain very cold the entire time.)

      The primary goal is to sail fast so no stopping to assemble anything complicated- someone might even be on shift sailing and eating at the same time. Probably nothing involving sharp knives as the boat will likely be heeled over and that seems needlessly risky.

      What kind of sammies? Brownies or cookies? What are we going to do about caffeine? Are two day old room temp breakfast tacos gross or okay?

      18 votes
    42. Using in-ear monitors with active noise-cancelling on the street

      Using iem with ANC on the street Hello! I'd appreciate knowing how is it to go out on the street using an iem with ANC. Especially when you are on a sidewalk next to a heavy-traffic street or when...

      Using iem with ANC on the street

      Hello!

      I'd appreciate knowing how is it to go out on the street using an iem with ANC. Especially when you are on a sidewalk next to a heavy-traffic street or when you are on the subway for example. Does the ANC eliminate completely those types of loud sounds? Or they are still present but just not on the same level?
      I ask this because I use IEM with foam ear tips but with no ANC. I feel that the foam ear tips normally makes a good seal and isolate conversations next to me or other sounds in my house. But when I go to the street in those places I mentioned the sounds are still somewhat present, although not at the same level as the music I hear. So I was thinking if I could achieve more isolation using for example a ANC iem.
      Any insight would be much appreciated thank you!

      12 votes
    43. Fellow climbers, boulderers, and other goatlike people: how do you improve?

      i've been climbing for a few years now, and am realising my mindset, patterns, etc need changing. on the other hand i want to continue to enjoy climbing as a hobby, and not treat it like a...

      i've been climbing for a few years now, and am realising my mindset, patterns, etc need changing. on the other hand i want to continue to enjoy climbing as a hobby, and not treat it like a grueling workout/job/torture.

      what do you do on the wall, off the wall, and outside of climbing itself (i.e. daily life) to help you improve?

      18 votes
    44. Fretless bass, yay or nay?

      I have been thinking about buying a fretless bass for a while now to go along with my regular one, and I've just found a pretty nice one that's in my budget. Do you think I should go for it?...

      I have been thinking about buying a fretless bass for a while now to go along with my regular one, and I've just found a pretty nice one that's in my budget. Do you think I should go for it? Sharing your experiences and any tips/advice would be very helpful!

      6 votes
    45. Need ideas on embedding info in old home movies

      I recently digitized some old home movies from my grandparents and looking through the film I realize I recognize almost no one. This got me thinking, I should go through this with my mother to...

      I recently digitized some old home movies from my grandparents and looking through the film I realize I recognize almost no one. This got me thinking, I should go through this with my mother to help me identify family members as she's probably the last person who knows who anyone is.

      Obviously I can just make a document with notes ex: 2:53 screen right, great uncle john"
      But I'm hoping there's a more elegant solution in which I can keep info with the file and not some auxiliary document that dosent live in the same place.

      I could just dump all that info into Metadata but that's maybe the lowest quality solution.
      The xray function of Amazon prime video is the example of the best solution in a perfect world. (if you don't know, when you pause or bring up the context menu on prime video, there's a bar that identifies everyone one scene with a matching headshot)

      I actually looked into it and there's an API that amazon uses for this called "RecognizeCelebrities" and uses images to train the program to recognize faces and populate it's menu. I'm not sure if it's open source but even if it was, it's over my level to use it practically I think.

      The last option I can think of is using a video markup platform like frame.io but that's not really a long term solution.

      Any ideas?

      16 votes
    46. Tips for finding a good landlord?

      In the next few months, I'm going to be on the rental market again for the first time in a couple of years. The last time I rented, I lucked into a very nice condo that was being rented out by the...

      In the next few months, I'm going to be on the rental market again for the first time in a couple of years. The last time I rented, I lucked into a very nice condo that was being rented out by the owner, and it was fantastic. We developed a great rapport. I looked after the place and paid the rent on time. She was kind and responsive whenever I had a problem. It felt like we were both getting exactly what we needed out of the arrangement.

      She wanted to raise the rent when my lease renewed, but it was a very reasonable ask to cover an increase in her HOA fees. It was significantly less any increase than I had been subjected to on any prior lease renewal, which I appreciated.

      After experiencing this, I decided I was done with corporate landlords who use algorithms (i.e., price fixing) to make sure they're extracting as much cash as possible and churning through tenants as they progressively price out more and more people without any regard for them and with no connection to the communities they're hollowing out on the way to more profit.

      I ended up leaving that condo for a reason unrelated to the rent increase, and I'm trying to find a similar setup again… but I'm not sure where to look honestly. Pretty sure I found that place on Craigslist which seems to have since devolved into a playground for scammy "landlords" whose dear old mothers have all come up sick in some far away corner of the country so they can't show me the furnished apartment they're renting for 20% below market rate, but if I'll kindly send the deposit, they'll gladly mail me the keys.

      Does anyone have any hot tips for how to find rentals like this in major metropolitan areas in the US?

      20 votes