Is it just another set of pronouns to you? Does it trigger you, or bother you in any way? Do you use it/its (or know someone who does), and if so how have people responded?

I can see arguments for all sides of this, but haven't seen much discussion about it. So, what are your thoughts?

I often think about the purpose and/or meaning of life and I've been struggling to work through these thoughts lately. As I teen I've had these thoughts often, but after experiencing my first manic episode (that led to psychosis) back in August 2022, the question of "What's the point?" pops into my head quite frequently.

Alongside this I've been struggling to come to terms with my new diagnosis of 'Bipolar Type I with psychotic features' as I've already been diagnosed with ADHD back in 2017 and I realize that both of these are life-long diagnoses. I know I just have to learn how to live with them, but that's been a tough pill to swallow.

I should mention that I'm not suicidal or anything, but rather I feel hollow and numb inside as I am very unfulfilled with life. Some days are okay and I'm still functioning and taking care of myself (so it's not like a full-blown depression), but as I mentioned before, I just don't see the point in all of this and don't find many things to be worthwhile or enjoyable anymore.

Basically I feel like a shell of my former self after my episode and have found much difficulty in enjoying the things I liked before from hobbies, to music and even food (I was a highly food-driven person). It's definitely much better than it was immediately after my episode, but it's as though life has been sucked out of me and I'm just going through the motions of living because it's what I'm supposed to do. I know recovery takes time, but it's been nearly 2 years since my episode and I thought this feeling would go away by now...

(I've also been seeing a counselor and OT and am doing things such as CBT and ACT which helped a bit, but not enough as I am here asking questions on an online forum seeking help).

If you have any advice on how to work through this it would be appreciated.

EDIT (12/6/24): I wanted to say thank you to all the responses and advice given. I may not have replied to everyone, but just know that I have been reading the comments and I do appreciate them :)

There was a question on reddit about whether rich people ever think about all the poor and starving people who are suffering while they live in luxury. It got me thinking about the "rich" more broadly, as many of the people like me who are on the internet are part of the global 1% if not the local.

I think a lot of rich people dont like to think about the idea that maybe the truly morally right thing to do would be to give up all their money and work a day job like everyone else.

So they try to avoid thinking about it at all to avoid having to constantly feel guilty about not doing the thing they know is right. Making a contribution to helping others just opens you up to other people or even your own conscience saying you could be doing more, and youll never be able to do enough to fully justify not doing so. Or alternatively you can embrace selfishness and give up on constantly trying to be a better person and never have to think about it again.

Maybe its easy to look at some billionaire and say they could lose 1/2 their money and not notice any change in their lifestyle, so they should be considered morally contemptable for not even offering a fraction of that when it could make such a difference for so many. But somewhere between that and living in poverty, there has got to be some line where your right to take care of yourself and your right to try and invest in your own future stops outweighing the shame of allowing the evils of the world to go unchallenged.

Then there is a fuzzy region around that line where its ambiguous whether you are doing enough good in the world or if you should feel morally compelled to change how you are living your life. And I think its probable the for a lot of people the place where they envision all their dreams coming true is somewhere on the negative end of the spectrum. So if your dream is to be a famous movie star, for example, at some point that dream might not be compatible with your moral imoerative to oppose classism.

Personally I hate having to work an office job. If I got the chance to make a fortune Id build a cabin in the woods and have food delivered to me and never have to deal with anything ever again. But doing so would be selfish. So I guess if I ever had the opportunity Id be corrupted by riches in a heartbeat. Which is kind of a downer of an ending to this line of thought.

Hello all, was inspired to fish for responses after seeing another user request resume feedback. Apologies if the background is on the longer side.

TLDR: Dropped out 10 years ago; have only a high school degree and university transfer credits. Conflicted between finishing my degree online while working full time, vs. specializing in a niche tech stack (Salesforce) via current employment. Looking for any input because I'm prone to decision paralysis.

Are there any other people on Tildes who regularly use VR?

• What has the experience been like for you?
• Which headset do you own?
• What do you use it for?
• Do you use it regularly?
• Any favorite/recommended games/apps?

I'm not sure if this would be better for ~music, ~tech, or what, but after messing around with Udio for a bit, I made some stuff I liked and wanted to get folks' thoughts. Imo, it's incredible to be able to get music from a text prompt - it means I, as someone who is mostly ignorant to music production, can have my musical idea and actually render that out as music for someone to hear. I can think "damn that would be cool" and then in kind of a fuzzy way, make it happen then and there. Whether it's good, I don't know. That's not up to me, really, but it is the kind of sound I wanted to happen, so I'm left conflicted on how to feel about it. Figured it would be worthwhile to show folks some of it, and see what they think.

I do enjoy synth and metal, so there's a lot of that in these. Feel free to be as critical as you like. If I can apply your criticism I will try to do it, and if you want to see how that works out, I'll share.

1. Cosmoterrestrial
2. A Floyd, Pinkly
3. Empire's Demise, Foretold
4. Metal for Ghosts Bedsheet Edition (the very end of this one is hilariously appropriate)
5. Multi-3DS Drifting

And here's a link to my profile, if you would like to browse. It will update too when I put more up.

They're all instrumental. Lyrical music is less appealing to me in general and Udio's voices do sound kinda weird to me more often than not. The way I made the tracks, I would start with a clip combining some genres/moods, and then add to either end of the clip until I had a complete song. Along the way, I could introduce new elements/transitions by using more text/tweaking various settings and flipping "manual mode" on and off. The results were fuzzy; I didn't always get what I wanted, but I could keep trying until I did, or until I got something that sounded "better". I wrote all the titles after the song was finished. The album art is from a text prompt.

I'm not sure what I think, to be honest. On the one hand, a lot of the creative decision-making wasn't mine. On the other, the song would not be what it is without me making decisions about how it came about and what feelings/moods/genres were focused upon/utilized. I think the best I can say is "use the tool and see whether it's enough to count". To me it feels almost 50/50, like I've "collaborated with my computer" rather than "made music". Does it matter? If the sound is the intended sound, the sound I hoped to make and wanted to share, is that enough to say it is "my music"? Is this perhaps just what it looks like to be a beginner in a different paradigm?

When I used Suno, I had a much more rigid opinion. What it produced, I called "computer spit". Because, all I could actually control was telling it to continue, changing the prompt, and giving it structure/genre tags that felt like a coin flip in terms of effectiveness. I had a really hard time trying to get it to keep/recall melody, and my attempts to guide it along felt more like gambling than deliberate decisions. It also couldn't keep enough in context to make the overall song consistent with respect to instrumentation. It's different with Udio, both because you have a lot of additional tools, and because it feels like those tools work more consistently at making the model do what you want. I still call the results "computer spit" where I've shown them off, but I'm unsure now whether the production has enough of myself in it to be something more. Perhaps not on the same level as something someone produced by playing an instrument, or choosing samples/arranging things in software, but also not quite the same as the computer just rolling along, with me going "thumbs up" or "thumbs down". Maybe these distinctions don't actually matter, but I'd be curious if anyone has thoughts along these lines.

I'm intentionally trying to avoid a discussion about the morality of the thing or what political/social ramifications it has, not because I don't care about that but because I'm in the middle of trying to understand the tool and what its results mean. Would you consider what I've posted here work I could claim as my own, or do you think the computer has enough of a role to say it's not? Is my role in the production large enough? Or perhaps you have a stronger position, that nothing the computer can possibly do in this way counts as original music. Does any of this change that position for you? I ask because I've gone through a lot of opinions myself as I've been following things, and one interesting bit is that I have not gotten any copyright notices when I've uploaded the music to Youtube (I did get notices with Suno's music). As far as I can tell, with what is available to me, this is all original.

And of course, the most important one: Did you like it? Is there something you think would make them better? Do they all suffer from something I'm not seeing/hearing? I'm not an expert technician nor a music producer, so perhaps my ignorant ears are leading me astray. Either way, I've had a ton of fun doing this, and the results to my ear are fun to listen to while I'm doing stuff. I wouldn't call any of it the best music I've ever heard, but I can also think of a lot that is worse. I think what I wonder the most is whether it comes off bland/plain. Most of the folks I show things to are a bit too caught up in being astounded/disturbed to really give me much feedback, so perhaps putting the request in this form will work out a bit better - ya'll have time to think on it.

As always, your time and attention is greatly appreciated

Edit: I should clarify. I am not attempting to be a musician. Hence calling it "computer spit" with anything public, and the lack of any effort to pitch it as something I did only on my own. Rather, I recognize the limit of my own understanding, and felt I'd hit a point where my ignorance of production meant I could not judge the results as well as I'd like. That means it's time to engage some folks because folks out there are likely to know what I do not and see things I can't. From that angle, a lot of the discussion is very interesting, and I'll be responding to those in a bit. But there's no need to argue for doing the work - I recognize that. I'm trying to see past my own horizons with a medium I don't put the work into. I'm a consumer of music, not a creator, so getting some perspective from folks more acquainted with creating and with the technology is really what I'm after in sharing the experience.

Edit again: Thank you all for a very interesting discussion. I had a spare evening/morning and this was a good use of it. For the sake of tying a bow on the whole thing, I'll share my takeaways as succinctly as I can manage.

It seems, at present, and at best, the role these tools can play is of a sort of personal noise generator. The output is not of sufficient interest, quality, complexity, etc., to really be regarded the same as human-produced music, is the overall impression I have been left with. And for other reasons, it may be that the fuzziness of it all is a permanent feature, and thus a permanent constraint on how far toward "authentic" the results can ever get. I was trying to avoid a discussion about my own creativity, the value of doing work, societal ramifications, etc., so I'll work on how to present things better. For what it's worth, this has all been part of what I do creatively - my area of study was philosophy, and the goal of that to my mind has always been "achieving clarity". So I am attempting to achieve clarity with things as they develop, as a hobby sort of interest while I'm busy doing completely different stuff and to better protect my own mind against dumb marketing and hype. So once again, I appreciate you all taking the time, and I wish you all well in all the things you do.

I write this topic knowing that it might get removed for being too controversial or incendiary or bring the anti-Semites out of the woodwork, in which case, I understand why this topic might get removed.

I am just hoping that tildes has a better capacity of engaging in such a charged topic, at least more than reddit.

onto my question:

Like anyone else who watches the news, I have been pretty aware of what is going on in the latest escalation of the Israel-Palestine war. I would not claim to be the most educated person ever, but I'd like to think I at least understand the broad-strokes.

And I consider myself generally a progressive person (not a liberal) so I personally am not a big fan of the Israeli govt. And yes I do condemn Hamas, I don't care what your struggle is, Oct 7th was a terror attack and only makes the situation worse for the people you claim to be freedom fighters for.

Having said all that, and seeing how much control Israel seems to have on the western powers, or specifically U.S., I will admit, my thoughts sometimes veer towards "they really do control things" and shit like that, but then 10 seconds later, I realize how ye-like that sounds and it's the exact same kind of thinking that led to the Holocaust. But then I also wonder if that is not entirely my fault and more because of the Jewish leaders who insist on making fervent support of Israel a strong part of their identity, thereby linking any criticism of the Israeli govt with criticism of Jewish people (or at least the Jewish leaders in the media who are supportive of Israel) rather than distancing themselves from a right-wing government.

So yea, I guess my question is: I don't think its entirely unreasonable to think that Israel has a surprising amount of control over western powers (specifically U.S.) but that sentiment in and of itself also veers dangerously close to antisemitism for my liking so I wondered how folks on here approach it?

While an extraordinarily long read, I appreciated

I just don't know what to read next.

This was a lot of high fantasy to take in!

I'm likely to resume my read of Band of Brothers, having seen the HBO series twice already. I'm aware of several deviations from the book; that's not relevant here.

But what next? Looking for thought and feeling provoking reads that evoke hope. Could be non-fiction or fiction.

Suggestions?

The May 2024 Backlog Burner event is officially over!

Over the course of the month of May, 13 participants moved 105 games out of their backlogs.

There were 7 bingo wins (5 Standard and 2 Golf).
Congratulations to @aphoenix, @CannibalisticApple, @Durinthal, @Eidolon, @kfwyre, @Weldawadyathink, and @Wes!

Also, congratulations to all other participants as well: @Carrow, @J-Chiptunator, @Mendanbar, @Notcoffeetable, @semsevfor, and @Shevanel

Finally, appreciation to those who didn't play any games but still popped in to talk about them with us: @brews_hairy_cats and @Wafik

It has been an absolute blast doing this with everyone. Thank you all for participating.

Use this topic to post your final bingo cards, give recaps of your games, and share any thoughts you have on the event itself.

Reminder: the Backlog Burner will now run on a regular schedule during every May and November. Our next event is only five months away!

Highlights:

• We averaged 8.1 games per person and 23.7 games per week
• There were 203 comments posted across 5 different topics
• Four different games were each played twice: Chop Goblins, Life Is Strange, Okami HD, and Wizard of Legend
• We played games that started with every letter of the alphabet except for K and Z
• @J-Chiptunator: "I played more games seriously than I did for the past 5 years"
• @semsevfor: "I started something Ive been putting off for 14 years"
• @aphoenix completed a Bingo Golf win with just 5 games
• If you would like an unequivocally definitive guide to Boomer Shooters, then @Shevanel has got you covered
• Likewise, @Wes has got you covered should you be in the market for Soulsborne mods
• It wasn’t until I compiled the final game list that I realized the game is called (the) Gnorp Apologue instead of Analogue

Quick links:

• Backlog Bingo Site
• Week 1 Discussion and Event Guidelines
• Week 2 Discussion
• Week 3 Discussion
• Week 4 Discussion
• Week 5(ish) Discussion

I'm right on the edge of buying a mini split for our shop space and I'm having a bout of indecisiveness.

To preface, we are located in south/central Texas. The shop is a standalone structure, is fairly well insulated but has a 2-car garage door and a single-pane window, so it isn't ideal. It's 625sqft with 9 foot ceilings. We have various tools that will be in use but nothing that creates excessive heat.

We are quite limited in funds so I'm not going with an HVAC company, nor am I going with a mr cool or other diy friendly unit due to cost. I'm capable to do the install myself, I'm not overly concerned about that.

I was originally looking at the 18k (1.5ton) senville leto. I ran various calculators and they all suggested this size would be enough up to 1000sqft or so. However, since I have 9 ft ceilings and I live in a hot climate and I have the big door and crappy window, the calculations pushed my 625sqft up to around 900 or so equivalent sqft in some cases and in others as high as 1200.

Due to my circumstances, I think I've convinced myself to move up to the 24k unit instead. I don't think it's too over provisioned for my specific scenario but I would like to hear your thoughts on how off the mark I am here.

Apart from size, there's also the question of efficiency. The other model I was looking at is the Aura by senville, and the difference is a higher seer2 rating and energy star certification.

Now, doing rough math, the difference in efficiency would be paid off by the savings of the more efficient unit in something like 8 or 9 years based on projected usage and my energy costs. I'm a pessimistic person and don't expect this unit to last 8-10 years. This is a cheap way to get the space comfortable to work in so that my side business can progress, and I would think if it's still going in that amount of time, I'll be able to afford a nicer unit by then.

However, after saying all that, I do notice that the capabilities of the Aura unit are greater. It is advertised to work in -20f weather while the leto works in as low as 5f.

Now, being in Texas, my primary concern is cooling, not heating, but no where can I find if the Aura system is more capable in hotter weather like it is in colder weather. This is slightly concerning because it seems most people use these primarily as heat sources and secondarily as cooling sources, and my situation is reversed.

Does anyone have any input as to whether the higher efficiency system will make a noticable difference in cooling performance when it's 110f outside?

Thanks for weathering my wall of text.

So last of the Cannes films this month with The Tree of Life by Terrence Malick from 2011. It won the highest price, Palme d'Or, at the Cannes Festival.

IMDb
Letterboxd
Wikipedia

Besides any thoughts on this movie, are you familiar with other Terrence Malick movies? Any comments on Cannes films in general?

The schedule for June is:

• 3rd: The Wicker Man (1973)
• 10th: Ravenous (1999)
• 17th: X (2022)
• 24th: The Exorcist (1973)

I saw a video by Throttle House with this premise and thought it was a fun one. What three cars or trucks would you want in your budget garage?

Let's assume that you can only buy vehicles legal in your country, but that there are no costs for importing. For instance, it might be illegal to import or drive a car with the steering on the opposite side as normal, so that's out. But you can import a legal car for no additional cost. Prices are today's prices, but if your prices are not in US$ then don't feel obligated to be exact down to the dollar/euro/CHF since exchange rates fluctuate. And to keep things easy, there is no VAT/sales tax.

If you'd prefer to spec out a wishlist for a country you'd like to live in (like Japan or Germany) you may do that instead, but same import rules apply. :)

tl;dr: 3D printing won't change your life but it will make your life 1% better in unexpected ways.

Last year, I spent a year-long work trip with someone who was very into 3D printing. To be frank, I initially had zero interest in it. From what I understood of 3D printing, it was expensive, required mechanical experience, coding knowledge, and ultimately not worth what you put into it.

Fortunately, my colleague didn't care what I thought about his hobby and bought a cheap printer to keep himself occupied during downtime at work. Originally, it was just something that occasionally made noise in the background. As the days went on, however, more and more doodads began to appear around the office. A cable organizer here, a desk decoration there; nothing earth-shattering.

The thing that really changed my mind, funny enough, was a simple powder scooper. During our trip, we shared a terribly designed creatine bottle with a narrow neck and no scooper. We spent months pouring out white powder by eyesight alone like amateur crackheads and I will never buy this bottle again. My colleague printed out a scooper with a long neck and the problem went away.

That was the key turnaround that changed my mindset - I had a problem; we printed a solution.

I got back from my trip and decided to try it out myself. After some serious deliberation on how committed I was to this, I purchased the Bambu P1S. It’s not the cheapest option for someone just starting and I chose a Bambu printer because a Youtuber argued that your best way to have fun as a beginner was to pick a printer that “just worked.” It was a compelling enough reason for me to shell $900. (no, I’m not sponsored, just telling my story.)

Some of my favorite prints:

• Long Scooper: the one that started it all for me. This scooper saved us a ridiculous amount of time and effort for what it is. It also gets to the heart of what 3D printing is to me - solving your individual problems with simple solutions.

• Pill Organizer: it’s got a lever that spins a wheel around, opening a different chamber for each day of the week. This one really opened my eyes to what is mechanically possible with just basic PLA plastic. People much smarter than me figured out ways to print devices with hinges, springs, and levers all without needing a single extra tool.

• Scour Pad Holder: This is the one that made most people around me go, “huh, that’s pretty neat.” You’re right, it is. No one likes touching a moist scour pad.

• Slide Wallet: I spent $74 on a SECRID cardslide wallet. While I don’t regret that purchase - I used it faithfully for four years ongoing - I did feel a bit foolish when I realized I could 3D print the same mechanism for $1.50.

That’s not to say anything about the decorative / gifting aspect of 3D printing either. I 3D printed a giant Charizard for my friend’s son the size of his head in eight hours.

That said, there is a mechanical learning curve to even the most user-friendly printers. With the Bambu series, I’d say that if you’ve ever built IKEA furniture or a 100+ piece Lego, assembly is pretty straightforward. It’s the troubleshooting that will get you. Even with basic filament and simple projects, I still encountered the nozzle clogging, filament stuck in the pipes, and bed adhesion problems.

This is a hobby that requires you to be willing to experiment and look up solutions. From what I understand, some printer brands are tougher than others so the learning curve will vary depending on your gear. I quickly learned that there’s numerous ways your print will mess up and your project will look like what the community calls the “spaghetti monster.” Unless you’re a born tinkerer, this is probably the most frustrating part of the process. However, accumulating knowledge to diagnose and solve the problem is very rewarding. I learned that the third slot on a Bambu machine is statistically more likely to jam and 0.5 kg spools are more likely to clog than 1.0 kg ones. Turns out that a lithophane needs to be printed vertically and only looks good with a white filament.

Overall, I enjoyed my time with my 3D printer and I don’t regret my purchase at all. It’s a hobby that provides near-instant gratification - you find the thing you want to print - or design it yourself - and boom, it’s sitting on your printer in a couple of hours. While I’m just taking files from the community and printing the .stl file, the skill ceiling is also very high once you add hardware to your projects (e.g. screws, ball bearings, Raspberry Pi). I’m going to continue to learn and I’m excited about where I can take this machine.

Some questions for the community:

1. If you have a 3D printer, how deep in the rabbit hole are you? Are you making your own CAD files?
2. What’s your favorite print? If you don’t own a printer, what’s a cool 3D print that stands out in your mind?
3. What’s a problem in your life where you think you could 3D print a solution?

I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter.

Let me clarify that this loss of love is not due to anyone's death. Perhaps just the same however, since they do not reciprocate your love and warmth anymore, for reasons completely unclear.

The case in point now is this: I'm 25M single and an alone child. I've spent most of my life searching for bondings that nurtured my emotional being. Finding a home for my emotions has been a major theme across different parts of my life. I was lucky enough to be bestowed with a cousin (20F) whom I could meet (at best twice a year, at worst once) and bond over the text otherwise, offering solace and comfort as if from a like-minded sibling. Whenever I needed a sink to pour my love, it was towards her. All was well until I met her yesterday, the meeting for this year (we live continents apart and we know these meetings are limited); I felt I'm distant, and I was invisible on a deeper level to her. Nothing we talked about was related to our well-being as we used to. It was all about the boys in her life, Instagram likes, and other such superficial things. It was as if she didn't know what I care about (I'm not even on IG).

I wasn't sure how to approach this. In general, even with a few friends, I've always had a hard time with an apparent loss of connection. How can you demand love from someone (Rhetorical; one shouldn't)? How should I let them know that the things were better and I want that? I mean nobody can force love. Should I accept (too hard to do) that those bondings have run their course?

Sorry for the emotional dump, and feel free to edit. Thanks for your thoughts.

Just had a chat with friends about the possibility and how it would likely be introduced.

Paraphrased into the following;

2.99$/Month
OEM installs have a 2 year license
Upgrades are free for the first year (from 11 to the new)
Comes with Office 365 and AI functionality to soften the blow

What are your thoughts on this?

Now that there are some specs, development news, and Snapdragon X Elite vs Intel benchmarks from the past couple days to discuss (with the exception noted below), I thought I'd put together a few links for people. I'm curious how people feel about this iteration of technology in an ARM package for development, tinkering, or edge AI applications. And are folks enthused by the possibilities (Windows or otherwise), dislike the price points, or tired of the AI/CoPilot buzz?

Snapdragon Dev Kit for Windows features Qualcomm Snapdragon X Elite Arm SoC for AI PC application development

New Qualcomm Snapdragon X Elite Benchmarks Show It's a Serious Contender

Qualcomm Snapdragon Dev Kit for Windows is a tiny desktop PC with a focus on AI apps

Debian 12 and Linux upstreaming for the Qualcomm Snapdragon X Elite SoC (January, 2024)

Microsoft is already taking orders for both Surface Pro (11ᵗʰ Edition, $999+) and Surface Laptop (7ᵗʰ Edition, $999+)^[1] orders planned for shipping in June. Each can be bought in X Plus or X Elite flavors, though Wikipedia suggests there are several models of the X Elite so I'm curious which flavors we'll see in MS devices.

^[1] Note that I linked to the "business" versions of the MS Store listings because they get straight to the point with a tech overview, etc. The "business" versions are listed for $100 more than the consumer versions.

Sharing this in ~comp, but if there's a better place for this then I'm happy to see it moved to a more suitable location. Thanks!

Wife and I are going through the home buying process in what most people would call a low cost of living area. For reference, homes are about 180-400k where I live in New York State.

I heard the horror stories but I had no idea how bad the issue is. I'll get to that in a minute.

I am curious what's going to happen with housing. Because on one hand, it seems like it's going to continue to rise until there is genuinely no such thing as middle-class home ownership. On the other hand, I see some troubling signs that remind me of a bubble.

The housing market will continue to be unaffordable
-I keep hearing that it's a supply issue. That we need to double the number of houses for things to get better. I also hear this isn't happening and that immigration is a factor. Sounds like a dog whistle but I'm curious if there is any truth to this.

-Other developed nations are worse. Many have 40-50 year mortgages and some countries even have multi-generational mortgages. This shows that it could get worse.

-Companies and wealthy individuals trying to make us all rent forever. Of course they would like nothing more and they'll probably keep working on this.

The current market is not sustainable

-There is a feeding frenzy on every single home that goes for sale in my area. Total shit boxes with sagging roofs are selling no problem and way above asking.

-The bank approved my wife and I for way too much money. We have student loans and daycare costs. The amount they approved us for would absolutely put us in the negatives every month. I thought that wasn't supposed to happen anymore. It feels strange and reckless for the banks to do that. For reference, we make about 100k/year combined but student loans and childcare take up a significant chunk of that. They approved us for $300k to get a home. We could get a $2400/mo* mortgage, which immediately wipes out 50% of our take-home pay. We ran a budget and even avoiding any purchases that aren't literal necessities, we would be running a deficit every month. We could never buy a shirt, a baby toy, a makeup product, a movie ticket, or even a pair of shoes and we would still be in the negative. Nevermind what would happen if one of our very modest, very used vehicles needed to be replaced or repaired. Obviously we didn't bid anything near 300k on any home. Wife's mom offered to front some inheritance money (give my wife some money now and then just leave the inheritance to her sister to make up for it) and we weren't even close still.

-When did a married nurse and teacher become completely priced out of the market? Is that a sign of a normal and healthy market? Now, to be fair, my wife could increase her salary if she wanted to go back to working in the emergency room. She doesn't want to do that while we have a baby at home and I understand that completely. But you would think we would be able to afford something.

I am clearly speaking from a position of relative privilege here. I recognize that. I grew up in a foreclosed and auctioned home that was old and small. My parents moved to an economically depressed town to get that house because they had no money and no help. There was no "borrowing a few grand from an inheritance" for them and if my wife wasn't in the picture that would never be an option for me either. I think my wife and I are doing a lot better than many other people in this area. What are couples who work at Amazon doing? Just saying fuck it and renting forever?

Anyway, I'm half venting and half asking. What is the actual endgame here for Americans? What happens next?

I have a KZ ZSN Pro IEM and it's been going strong for 4+ years.

I also have a cheap Bluetooth QCY IEM that I use for podcasts and when I don't want wires tangling me.

Whenever I change from the Bluetooth QCY to the wired KZ I am in awe. The KZ ZSN Pro is a blast to listen to. Specially metal. The definition, the sound of the bass drums, everything is clear and powerful.

So I decided to try some entry level open back headphones and bought the SHP9500 that was cheap on Aliexpress recently. I thought I would find it even better since a lot of people sang it's praise for the price, but I am underwhelmed.

I find my KZ to have way more definition and power.

Also I need to up the volume of my smartphone quite a bit compared to the IEMs. It is near max volume.

Of course they are different beasts and the IEMs are literally inside my head. I don't really know what I expected.

I'm sure beyerdinamic or other more expensive brands might be better, but I don't feel like going down that path.

I'm going to keep the SHP9500 for a week more to see if I like it for different situations, but for now I am not amused.

Just a thought exercise to see how you'd go about getting someone started from scratch. The person could be your nephew, a spouse, a coworker, or someone on the internet who needs a new hobby. :) I'm curious how that money would get spent and how that money might spend time. How far would it go? How would you make that time and money count towards a new passion?

Would you buy someone a small motorcycle? Polaroid camera? Time at a bouldering facility? Would you make/give them a really cool sewing station with a bunch of cubbies? A shoebox full of your MtG cards (just the extras, right?) and a ticket to a convention? A custom printed set of LEGO building instructions and the bricks to go with them? Outsider art to inspire a new style of artist passion?

If this is a success, I might post again in a month or so with a lower dollar value to challenge folks.

Posting a bit early as I have less time tomorrow. We continue with Cannes films with the Chinese Luxury Car from 2006 where it was honored with the Un Certain Regard award.

IMDb
Letterboxd
Wikipedia

Any thoughts on this film is welcome.

The rest of the schedule for May is:

• 27th: The Tree of Life

Kind of a boring race, honestly. At least until the the last ~10 laps or so. Then Lando ate into that already small gap (for Max) of like 6-7sec and seriously challenged Max for P1! I think the gap the two was down to 0.7sec. I was wearing my RBR jacket; thought I might have to change into my McLaren jacket! One more lap and I think Lando would've had Max.

I definitely expect Lando at the top of the podium again at some point this season. And I'm looking forward to it.

Next race:

Monaco Grand Prix
Circuit de Monaco
Sunday, May 26

Lastly...LOTS of racing next weekend. Aside from Monaco, IndyCar's 108th running of the Indianpolis 500 is on Sunday, along with NASCAR's Coca-Cola 600 only a couple hours later. There's also the Formula E Shanghai E-Prix and a MotoGP race at the Circuit de Barcelona-Catalunya. I'm sure there're more, but these are some of the bigger races.

I have tried and failed to journal many times in the past. I always find myself self-editing, avoiding writing certain thoughts or feelings and just overall not being as authentic or honest or genuine as I should be to actually get some value out of journaling. I wish I could get over this “self-censoring” habit because I love reading and writing and really think journaling could be a great outlet for me.

So, I ask, what tips do you have to help write? To help actually get your thoughts and feelings out on the page, without judging yourself or feeling self conscious or critical? What do you write? What do you find helps you write more honestly and genuinely?

Could really use some help and guidance.

So, I have some crap lying on the floor. Not crap in the sence that it goes straight to recycling, just lots of tidbits which I don't exactly know what to do with; semi-sorted papers, notebooks, various VR gear, some books which I don't really have room for in my bookcase, some folders where some of the papers should probably go into, my laptop, a stone which I guess I use for weightlifting except I forget to do that, and when I see all this stuff, my brain just shortcircuits.

So I decided that, okay, I can just ignore this and try tidying up this shelf which I had tried to make into a sort of cabinet of curiosities but which over time had degenerated into a bit of mess; a LCD game, the box to said LCD game, vintage headphones, vintage phone, retro Nokia mobile, beach glass, fossils, various stones, some mess which doesn't really belongs here, a cat skull (I think) ... and of course, the same thing happened. My brain just said nope, too much to deal with.

I know there are ways to go about it. If getting my apartment in a habitable state is too much, I can ignore all of it and just focusing on one room. If my coding project seem to overwhelming, I can decide on a alpha milestone to work towards and based on that make a bucket list of the tasks and start with the most basic one, and if the first one is too overwhelming, split it up into sub-tasks. So there are some tried-and-true ways to deal with it.

But for the first time, I started to wonder what exactly goes on with the brain here? Why does something consisting of a relatively small number of sub-tasks seem so overwhelmingly hard? Is it like that for everyone, does it have a name, what?

I'm very sorry, but this is going to be rant. One that may seem to come up almost daily, but I still feel the need to vent.

Every day I feel like I'm jumping through hoops to keep a little bit of privacy and autonomy, without ever winning. DuckDuckGo is my search engine, use a paid mail provider, I try to stay away from anything Google and Meta, use only Signal, ad blocking everywhere, hosting most services locally, etc. It seems, however, to make no difference in the long run. The user-profile-building just seems to enter the home faster than I can mitigate it. Kids install some new app or new hardware ends up listening in, privacy infringement is there.

The reason I'm starting this post now is because I switched ISP and TV provider recently, but it has been on my mind for a long time. Finding one that isn't owned by one of huge 3 parent companies, is almost impossible here. After a year of deciding, I finally figured it was time to throw in the towel and just pick the least bad option. Yesterday was the day of switching and it has been such a frustrating process.

The provided router doesn't allow me to turn off its WLAN. I live in a city, so the airwaves are already crowded enough as it is. No need to keep that antenna on, but screw me, that's not possible. Opened up the device to just remove the card, but everything is soldered on the board and disconnecting the antennas didn't do shit.
It's possible to buy a modem/router myself, but it'll need to follow their requirements and will set me back $200. It would be okay if the rest of the service was great, but here comes the TV part!

The device they use for TV is apparently Android TV. I assumed it would be IPTV with this subscription, but Android TV isn't that. Booting the device makes it immediately clear they are here to harvest data. It makes me so unhappy that a service I'm paying for, is also making money on the side by collecting data. To get a quick idea of what's being done, I routed the box through wireshark to sniff DNS traffic. It's riddled with domains used for data collection and ads. That combined with the features this box wants me to agree to (location, using the mic, access local network, sign into PlayStore, make a profile including real life information) does not make me trust this device. So I've decided to not play and will be sending it back.

People around me are pretty conscious about what they do online, but compared to them I'm highly paranoid. Wherever I look, there are privacy issues. It seems impossible to escape from. How are other people dealing with this?

UPDATE: I don't know if anybody is really interested, but I thought I would update anyway. I decided to listen to my gut and I cancelled the subscription. It feels like the best decision I've made in a long time. It's nice to feel like I'm still a little bit in charge, even though I know that's also just a false sense of autonomy. Suck it, Google! You're not the boss of me :-)

I noticed that Tildes has had no previous discussion of Andrew Hickey's wonderful music podcast A History of Rock Music in 500 Songs. So I thought I'd write a little about it, in case it might bring as much joy to someone here as it has brought me. It's easily my favourite podcast, and it might actually be my favourite work on music history in any medium. It's really that good.

The podcast started something like six years ago, and like its name suggests, it presents a history of rock music. But not just the "four white guys and some guitars" rock music of the 1970s and beyond, but a far more in-depth exploration of where the genre came from and how it has evolved. This is not one of those podcasts where a host or hosts have chosen a topic, done some light resarch and then talk about what comes to their mind. Instead, each episode is thoroughly researched, pre-written and edited. It is a high quality audio lecture delivered by an excellent and witty storyteller who knows what he is talking about.

The first episode was on "Flying Home" by the Benny Goodman Sextet, a jazz and jump blues track released in 1939, and therefore naturally not really a rock song, but something that works as a good starting point in the wider discussion of the genre's evolution. From there, episode by episode, Hickey has told us about the (or rather "a") history of rock music chronologically, taking us through the 40s and 50s, and currently heading towards the end of the 60s. He has indicated that just as 1939 was a somewhat arbitrary starting point, his 500-song history will end with a song that was released in 1999. Looking at his current pace, it may be a while until we get there.

The latest episode is song #174, "I Heard it Through the Grapevine", first released in 1967. It's part one of a two-part narration, with the current episode concentrating on the song's early history and its writers Norman Whitfield and Barrett Strong, while the upcoming episode two will look at Marvin Gaye's version and career at that point.

Hickey has in fact recently started to split some songs into multiple episodes, and he did it also with the previous song, song #173, Bob Dylan's "All Along the Watchtower", first released in 1967. That one had Part 1 that concentrated on Dylan's version, and then Part 2 that covered Jimi Hendrix's version. Although, when I say that those episodes concentrate on Dylan's and Hendrix's versions of the song, that's not exactly true. It would be more accurate to say that Part 1 concentrates on Dylan's career in the late 60s, as well some related subjects and artists from the era, while Part 2 looked at Hendrix's career at the time, as well as subjects and artists related to him around that time.

And this is actually an important point to make. While the episodes certainly tell you a lot about the song that they are discussing, they are not solely about the song in question, and they never really aim to give you a subjective interpretation of the song or anything like that. Instead, you are given plenty of historical facts, you hear a lot of interesting stories, and you find out how the song and the people who were involved with it fit into a larger narrative of rock music. And you also get to hear excerpts of some really good music along the way. Hickey is very much an expert in the topic, a great storyteller, and seems like someone who knows how to do his research.

The podcast's early episodes were shorter, about half an hour or so, while some of the more recent episodes have become much longer, some reaching over four hours, which is the reason why Hickey has started to split some episodes into multiple parts. In addition to the main podcast, there are also Patreon bonus episodes which are not part of the main narrative, but which I can highly recommend. They function as companion pieces to the main story, and typically last between 10 to 30 minutes; for instance, the bonus episode for the first "I Heard it Through the Grapevine" episode was on the song "Bend Me, Shape Me" by Amen Corner. And so, although he is officially just at song #174, Hickey has probably covered well over three hundred songs so far.

The podcasts are free of ads and fully community supported. You should be able to find the podcast on all the main podcast providers, and it has a dedicated website at 500songs.com. If you don't know where to start, the double episode on "All Along the Watchtower" that I mentioned earlier could be a good way to check if the podcast is for you. Or, if you have some favourite artists or songs from the 40s, 50s or 60s, check out the tags on the website to see if he has made episodes on them. Or you can of course just start from the beginning, like I did.

Last year, Hickey was also a guest on Rick Rubin's podcast, and that interview could also be a good introduction to Hickey and his work.

I guess I'll post another thoughtful analysis rant on tech trends. It has been mentioned here in a few threads already but I simply wanted to try to start a focused discussion.

Personally I first noticed significant degradation of search functionality around 2018 or so, while specifically Google was mentioned at least as far back as 2016. But it is not simply Google or even just general search engines. Any random site specific search functionality or discoverability algorithms on various sites share these trends too.

It really seems that the focus is simply on delivering as many results as possible with actual quality or even relevance being somewhere on the tail end of priorities. It is not even just lack of(useful, consistent) search operators, lack of transparency, lack of structured search possibilities, lack of sorting options, lack of granularity - it is the simple disregard for the basic intent of the query with some implementations sometimes being actually more accurate with fewer keywords with no option to modify this behavior.

It is especially damaging for(at least my) ability to research a topic. A decade and half ago I could go in with a topic I had no idea about and emerge two hours later with a very basic but likely mostly accurate and slightly in-depth overview by refining my searches. Now I'm lucky to get one single thoughtful blog post or discussion among dozens or tutorials, 10-bests and ads with the query being almost completely disregarded and keywords being straight up ignored to deliver this deluge of both low quality and mostly completely irrelevant results.

Are there any projects, search engines or anything other that aim to deliver actually useful, steerable, user directed results?

Hey everyone!

Do you have any experience with time blocking? Do you use any apps to help or do you do it all manually in your calendar? I recently watched a video I found on Tildes by Answer in Progress (https://youtu.be/vYaNiC4kchg?si=zh02N4bStqAhBBAe) about attention span. I have heard a lot about time blocking in the past, but always thought I never really needed it.

However, recently I've been starting to realize maybe I'm not doing well mentally..days can slip by on YouTube, or a video game, and the things I wanted to get done get pushed back to the next day..and the next day, and so on..or things I was passionate about, things I want to succeed in that I am good at..just sort of slip away, and I stop doing them and lose my drive. So maybe I need to block time to get it done... I'm not sure. So I guess I can try Meditation and time blocking..

Anyway, anyone have some suggestions if they do this? Have you found that it helped?

Random thought. What if we taxed property based on the area per person of the property, as opposed to sale value?

Edit and quick intro to those who mostly rent: most real property in the US, especially residential property, is taxed yearly based on some variation of something called "fair market value," usually assessed by a local tax assessor's office

I'm proposing that a property would be taxed for every square meter of space per person in the designated property unit. It can't be totally simplified, but should be fairly straightforward. There could also be progressive brackets. It might not make make sense to apply it strictly per person, but rather for a typical use. That is, we would assume "single family residential" properties to house 3.4 (totally made up number) people per house and property.

The goal of this is to find a fair, market-driven incentive to build density into urban cores.

A similar approach could be applied to commercial space (but probably not industrial).

It could be coupled with a sales tax (currently missing in most real property tax regimes, at least in the US) to capture runaway property valuations in certain jurisdictions.

Alternatively, we could drop the property value based tax rate (but not eliminate it), and then add a per person-area surcharge.

It's not meant to increase revenue, although it could certainly be used that way. It could also be use to decrease revenue, and maybe that would be a good way to sell it. But at the end of the day, developers and residents would both have an incentive to pursue as dense development as possible, even if there is not a density driving pressure of desirablity, which only exists in a few really cool urban cores.

Disclaimer: This post is probably overly-long and a little all over the place. It’s just as much me writing things out to get a sense of where I am and how I feel about everything as it is asking a question to a real audience. For anyone who genuinely wants to take the time to read it, hopefully not read too into it, and provide any insights – thank you. I'm not sure how large the LGBT community on Tildes might actually be, I will probably end up x-posting this to Reddit despite the fact that I’ll most likely end up regretting that decision

I'm a late-thirties, gay, cis gendered, masculine presenting (for lack of a better term), otter (beard, harry, smaller frame so not considered a bear). For almost all of my life I've lived in smaller locals that lacked any real gay scene and so I have almost entirely lived apart from the larger gay world and community. To a large extent I'm grateful for this, I think in my younger years the focus on partying and sex would have been disastrous for me and now my friend groups are diverse with straight males and females and a few gay friends. However, a large part of me feels like I've missed out on something and continue to miss out on something.

In the past year or so I've developed a gay Instagram profile that is now very connected to the gay bear community in my country and a few neighboring ones. I’ve also been in a larger city for a few years now and have a real gay community that I could connect with if I wanted to. Obviously, I'm primarily attracted to more bear type men and I've found that through Instagram I'm seeing that a lot of guys in the community remind me of myself in manner of interests and style. I also see this as a chance to make some friends who would actually see me and understand me, something that I think gets a little lost with my non-gay friends and my gay friends who are not like me in other ways

Huge disclaimer: I'm viewing all of this through the lens of Instagram which makes my interpretations of what I'm seeing already dubious - the app is largely triggering FOMO and a touch of envy in me, I fully understand that.

There was a bear dance night in my city a few weeks ago and many guys from different regions came through to celebrate and find community. I watched it all distantly through Instagram posts and stories and through all my voyeurism I found myself extremely tempted to go to the party but remained frozen in intimidation by a community that I really don't understand.

My worries summed up:

• We’re not one of the bigger bear events around so it’s clear from their posts that these guys all know each other and probably hang out multiple times a year. Approaching that as a complete outsider is already anxiety inducing to me

• Even though I logically know that the only way to make friends is to put yourself out there, I’ve at times faced rejection and exclusion via the apps and just fear that this would be the same thing but in real life. Despite my attempts to date my way into the community, I haven’t had a lot of success breaking through. (Please don’t take this to mean that I’ve fully fetishized bears, I don’t limit my relationships to something so narrow at all)

• One of my hangups is the fact that I myself am not a bear. My understanding is that Otters and “masc” guys are often very welcome in the bear community, which I am, but not actually being one of them makes me question my place there. I am aware how terrible this is as it perpetuates the gay culture of largely basing worth on physical characteristics and the fact that bear does not equal masculine. I hate to bring up that last part but I just want to be descriptive

• I would be loath to enter into a community whose identity hangs on partying. I see on Instagram that a lot of groups of bear friends do other activities than drinking but they also do a fair share of bar-going and partying. If these bear events would end up turning out like the circuit party culture, then I have no real interest. I do like to occasionally go out drinking with friends but have no intention of maintaining a party lifestyle. In a similar vein, I wouldn’t want to enter into a community that is primarily sex-based either and I do get those vibes from these groups and parties sometimes as well

• My intentions for wanting to participate are unclear. I see these guys building what seem like genuine friendships with each other and I do genuinely want that but at the same time it would be dishonest for me not to admit that there is a sexual component to this and a desire for validation from a group of men who I find attractive

• Is my understanding of this community completely invalid? Maybe the impressions I’m gaining of the community are completely unrealistic and I should completely rethink the underlying question of this entire post – would I find value in being a member of the bear world?

It’s clear to me that in the end my Instagram habit, particularly my “bear” profile, is triggering some anxieties and insecurities in me that I’ve largely managed to concur in real life. I already have caring friends and have had a rich dating and relationship life without being part of any real gay community and so my final question to myself is whether I should just delete the IG profile and abandon any thoughts of going to gay parties – I may just be looking to fill a hole in myself that my real friends and love life should be enough for.

We continue with Cannes films with The Zone of Interest which premiered at Cannes in 2023 where it won the Grand Prix award. It also won two Oscars for Best International Film and Best Sound.

IMDb
Letterboxd
Wikipedia

Besides any thoughts on this movie, do you think this adds anything new to the already long list of WW2/Holocaust movies?

The rest of the schedule for May is:

• 20th: Luxury Car
• 27th: The Tree of Life

I try to do this exercise with myself sometimes and then... forget. But thought it'd be a fun thread.

(Also, obligatory reminder that Tildes is also public and all comments are available without login, so keep things uh, vague enough.)

Before starting this topic, I thought I'd start a discussion that wasn't held before. @cfabbro and other commenters who have better memories than I pointed out that this isn't the case. They've also laid out it's been tried and was unsuccessful. I stand corrected.

I do not want to contribute any noise to the website, so I'd appreciate it if @Deimos can lock or remove the topic all together, if he deems it appropriate. I'd also appreciate it if no further comments are made so as to not put any further burden on moderation. I apologize for wasting everyone's time.

I watched the 2003 miniseries which I thought was decent enough. It certainly piqued my interest, so I went into the show itself with an open mind and kind of excited that I had a nice, long sci-fi series to get into.. but.. I'm now solidly underway with season 1, a lot of it falls totally flat. I just finished episode 5 and while it's not the worst show I've ever watched, it certainly isn't great either and I have to say I don't understand why this show is praised. It feels really dated.

There are some truly awful scenes where it feels like I'm being preached to, like "remember to go in for your breast cancer screening!" and "prisoners aren't slaves!" and the scene from this episode where the president appears on the Galactica just to tell the commander "ackshually 45000 people are more important than just 1!" as though it's some deep philosophy, and then he changes his mind off of that, but like, his character really isn't dumb enough to not have already considered the morality of the situation. He should have perfectly well realized that they'd expended half of their fuel reserve searching for the downed pilot, and that's more than they can afford. He is not stupid, but the writing certainly can be.

There are also a ton of cliches and cheap story beats like fake-outs, cliff-hangers, characters that could solve all their problems if they simply communicated, dundundun dunnn moments with fabricated tension, not to mention the amount of halfway meaningless filler. It's a shame because the lore and overarching plot is interesting, but when every episode has so much pointless conflict in them that always gets resolved 10 minutes later, it starts to really drag. The episodes are self-contained and I get that, but I mean most of it is to the point that it's borderline a soap opera.

And it's not even filmed or directed well or anything else to make up for it. The desaturated colours are depressing as fuck, there is no cinematography to speak of, the special effects are (understandably) very cheap, everything is truly ugly which while I understand that's the point, it just detracts even more. The lighting is also inconsistent between some scenes, and the fight choreography is honestly laughable. You also have shoddy camera work and obnoxious, never ending close-ups of every actor's face - I have seen all of their pores by now, thank you very much. And omg why are they so obsessed with wide shots of the ships and then snap zooming not once, but twice, every time!!

Also, variations of the word "frak" is just so grating but I'm nitpicking at this point lol

I apologize to any fans of the show because this turned into a bit of a rant, but goddamn.. I'm kind of grasping at straws to find things I actually like about BSG. Maybe it's because it's a network production? Perhaps I'm too young to watch and truly appreciate it/its era of American network TV? Like the only of these kinds of shows we had in my country that I watched when they were current was things like Friends, Monk, Desperate Housewives etc., so I missed out on all of these supposedly great shows back then (I was only 11 years old when BSG started airing). I really love some of the other things from the 00's that I've watched much later on though, but those were cable shows like The Wire, so it's not just because it's from the 00's.

Anyway, all of the above reasons (and more) are why I usually stay far away from network shows with 20-episode seasons, but I thought BSG was going to be different because it's my impression that it has a really good reputation? Like I said in the beginning, the miniseries was decent so I'm not sure what changed between it and season 1? I think I'm gonna demote it to a background show unless the next few episodes pick up a bit. Should I keep going? Does it get better after season 1?

click here for mood music for this post

Sometime recently I got it into my head that I wanted to go back and replay all of the so-called "Igavania" games in the Castlevania series - the three on Gameboy Advance, the three on Nintendo DS, and, of course, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night on PSX. I played through most of these back when I was a teenager and liked them, but haven't touched them since. Metroidvania games are a dime-a-dozen these days but I haven't found anything else that scratches the itch of exploration-meets-RPG-elements-meets-gothic-aesthetics.

Well except Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night, I guess. That game was pretty good.

I decided to begin with the GBA trilogy since Circle of the Moon is the first Igavania I ever played and the one I have not played in the longest. I pieced through the whole trilogy in release order over a few weeks; here are some stray thoughts from the experience:

Castlevania: Circle of the Moon

• The graphics in this game have aged beautifully. It's the only of the GBA & DS games that - to my knowledge - doesn't heavily re-use sprites from Symphony of the Nights, and as a result it has an aesthetic cohesion a step above any of the following games. Circle of the Moon is infamous for being way too dark on the original, non-backlit GBA screen (I had to use a wormlight back in the day to be able to see it), but with that limitation irrelevant on modern hardware it has a clean, moody aesthetic that's just solid.
• Overall, the game feels very much like "classic Castlevania stuff, remixed." That's certainly true of the music, which is primarily (very good) remixes of classic Castlevania tunes with just a few (very good) original compositions. This applies to the gameplay too, which is classic (you only get a whip, the upgrades are very standard stuff) but with a big new twist thrown in:
• The DSS system. Throughout the game you can collect 20 cards, divided into two categories, and by equpiping two at once you can utilize your magic meter to activate one of 100 DSS effects. Some are straightforward stat boosts, some offer reprieve like healing or invulnerability, and others offer really fun magic, weapon, and transformation effects. It's a joy to try out the combinations every time you get a new card, and they help give the game a lot of space for exploring your personal play style.
• Did I mention that the whip feels really good? The whip feels really good. The sound effect and animation are really satisfying.
• Circle of the Moon has some rough quirks that keep it from being a 10 out of 10, though. DSS cards, for instance, are locked behind random drops by enemies, some with absurdly low drop rates. If you just play through the game normally, without consulting a guide on specific drops or farming cards, there's a decent chance you'll pick up <50% of the cards before you finish the game. I get that you don't want to give the keys of the kingdom to the player right away, but why on earth would you build an awesome, fun game mechanic, and then set it up so players won't see most of it without extremely un-fun farming and grinding? Thankfully a "Magician" mode that gives you access to all of them straight away opens up after you finish the game once, but not everyone will make it that far or want to go back for a second playthrough.
• The difficulty is also allllll over the place. As a teen I got stuck forever at the twin-headed dragons, and going back as an adult ... yeah, I got stuck again. I had to look up strategies, go hunt down a specific sub-weapon (the cross, which is very overpowered in this game), grind a few more levels, and steal away to an alcove of the battle arena to a specific spot where the dragons can't touch you to abuse the DSS healing power. The dragons are the most egregious example but they're far from the only one; there are several points where the game switches from hard-but-fair to ha-ha-eat-shit-stupid. It seems like the designers fully expected the players to use and abuse DSS, especially the healing abilities, because there's no way someone played through this and thought "yeah that's a smooth difficulty curve."
• Special shout out to the optional battle arena. Yes, it's optional, but the difficulty of this 17 room gauntlet is truly hilarious. I was only able to beat it - near the end of the game, at a high level, with the best equipment available - by abusing save states and playing the last half of it in slow motion (the wonders of emulation). And it still took me over an hour!
• There are also some design decisions that are just strange. Your character, Nathan Graves, begins with an excruciatingly slow walk speed and a unwieldy jump that's almost vertical. Within the first 15 minutes of the game you pick up a character upgrade to be able to run - i.e. move at a normal speed - but you have to double tap a direction on the d-pad to activate it. So now you have to spend the next 6-8 hours of your playthrough double-tapping a direction any time you want to move just to move at a normal speed. Why? Very strange.
• There's also a whole area of block pushing puzzles. They're not too difficult, but is this really what Castlevania needed? 20 minutes of slowly pushing boxes?
• I've read that Circle of the Moon was made by a different team, with a different director, than the rest of the "Igavanias." You definitely get that sense when playing it, that it's just a bit different, and it really endeared me to the game. It has its issues, but most of those can be smoothed out with modern backlit screens, save states, and online wiki guides. Overall it was a joy to revisit, probably an 8 or 9 out of 10 in my book.
• I also highly recommend Jeremy Parish's retrospective look at Circle of the Moon

Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance

• Castlevania: Harmony of Dissonance is what you get when you learn mostly the wrong lessons from the feedback the previous game received. I played this one back in the day and but lost interest and never finished it. I now see why.
• I'll start with the good. The character movement feels better; we finally have a normal run speed and the shoulder buttons can be used for left and right dashes that are very satisfying to use. Together they give this game a much faster pace than Circle of the Moon. The jump is weirdly floaty but you get used to it.
• The graphics have also seen a big improvement in a technical sense. The sprites are larger and more impressive - especially on bosses - though this is also the beginning of heavily re-using sprites from Symphony of the Night. You'll definitely recognize some old favorites if you played that game.
• Honestly, though, that's where the improvements end.
• The art direction has taken a big step back. Konami heard that Circle of the Moon was too dark and now as a result we've got Harmony of Dissonance, a game so insanely bright and chock full of garish psychedelic color choices that not only did it completely remove the moodiness of the first game, it led me, for the first time in my life, to download and install a romhack. Maybe on the original, unlit GBA screen these choices looked good, but on modern displays it feels like Castlevania by way of a Big Top Circus. And then if that wasn't enough the game adds an extra bright outline around your character at all times. Good grief.
• The music has also taken a humongous step back. Supposedly more of the GBA's processing power was used up by the graphics so the sound had to be deprioritized. But even putting aside the big step down in fidelity most of these compositions - save the main theme and one or two others - are not memorable, hummable, or fun to listen to. They're just ... there. There, with bad sound quality.
• All of this would be excusable if the gameplay were tremendous, but again we've learned the wrong lessons and gone backwards.
• DSS has been removed, and there's nothing nearly as interesting to take its place.
• ...but they decided to leave in block pushing. WHY?!
• The rocky difficulty of Circle of the Moon is gone, and now the game is far too easy. I beat almost every boss in this game on my first try, which is definitely not true of either of the other two GBA Castlevania games. The fun movement options have a side effect of making the game even easier, since you can quickly dart around the screen dodging things.
• The level design is poor, with endless, unmemorable hallways and generally boring layouts. Plus the entire first half of the game is basically linear
• Then the cherry on top is that halfway through the game reveals that there are two parallel castles, and it sends you on an excruciating fetch quest across both of them. So you get two identical castles of boring level design, middling music, recycled bosses, and the most tedious backtracking I've done in years.
• There are so many aspects of the game design that just feel sort of busted. Once you're 10 levels above an enemy they only grant you 1 EXP for each kill, so there is truly no upside to all of the tedious backtracking you're forced to do. There are shops in the game, but they all have weird requirements you have to meet to spawn them, and even once you do there's barely anything interesting to buy.
• This game is a chore, and is the only one I would not recommend. It's not "bad," necessarily - I'd give it a 5/10 - but I had to consult guides so many times to figure out where in which castle I needed to go, and I was downright relieved when it was over.

Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow

• It feels like this is where the team at Konami finally found their groove. Aria of Sorrow is a very good game.
• The graphics are still brighter than Circle of the Moon's moody look, but the color choices are dialed back to a sensible, tasteful level. No more wild acid circus backgrounds, and no more bright outlines around characters!
• The music has taken a big step up, with tons of memorable tunes.
• The character control has finally found a nice middle ground between Circle of the Moon's stiffness and Harmony of Dissonance's hyperfast floatiness. Instead of left and right dashes letting you zip around the map there's just a backdash, which is a sensible compromise that allows for lots of maneuverability in combat.
• The level design is a huge, huge step up from Harmony of Dissonance, and is probably better than Circle of the Moon's. Aria of Sorrow does a great job at giving compelling reasons to backtrack with interesting ability unlocks and thoughtfully placed warp zones and area connections.
• The difficulty curve is pretty smooth throughout, except maybe the boss fight with Death - but I found that one an interesting challenge, rather than a brick wall. This is still an easier game than Circle of the Moon, but not a total pushover.
• We've finally got a system to rival DSS: souls that you can gather from enemies and then equip for all sorts of passive and active effects. It's still luck based, but you'll get enough of a variety of souls through normal play for it to not be too bothersome. There are lots of interesting souls, but I missed the "combination" aspect of DSS, of experimenting between combining different cards and seeing what they do together. Here we've just got basically three slots for three types of souls - passives, abilities, and attacks. This is a totally fine way to do it, but it means that one or two of those slots are always just going to be the same one or two souls that give you whatever stat boost you need and whatever ability you rely on the most.
• There are a few more interesting abilities that tie into the exploration as well. When you start the game you can't sink into water and explore, you merely float at the top. Before you even get that ability, though, you get the ability to walk on top of water as if it's a hard surface, opening up interesting level design gimmicks. Later on you can both sink or stand on top depending on what you have equipped.
• The downside is this does mean too much time in menus switching between the same 3 or 4 souls over and over again - at least until you get flight abilities that let you skip a lot of the navigational tedium. One wonders why they couldn't have made things like on top of water / in water contextual abilities (maybe you land on the water, but then press down to sink into it?) instead of requiring players to unequip the ability they want to use 95% of the time, equip a water navigation soul for one room, then open the menu again to switch back.
• At least we don't have any huge block puzzle rooms any more! The environmental puzzles that do exist are far more interesting.
• Instead of the whip of the previous two games there are several classes of weapons the main character, Soma, can equip, including swords, axes, and even a handgun (which seemed pretty useless in my time with it). The variety is neat, but I have to say none of the weapons felt as good to use as the satisfying whip of Circle of the Moon, with its supremely meaty sound effects. I didn't expect to, but I found myself missing the straightforward, satisfyng combat of Circle of the Moon.
• And that's sort of my feeling on the game as a whole. It is a very good game, at least as good as Circle of the Moon, and it doesn't have nearly as many strange friction points as CoTM. It's an 8 or 9 out of 10, for sure. But for me, specifically, something about Aria of Sorrow sort of came and went for me, like it was much smoother than CoTM but didn't leave me with as many memorable moments. I'm not sure how to describe it, so I'll chalk it up to personal insanity.

Oh also all three of these games have a story. Does anyone care about the stories in Castlevania games? I skim the character dialogue while quickly clicking through it and that's pretty much it.

I've now moved on to the DS games, and am loving revisiting Dawn of Sorrow so far - my favorite from back in my teenage years. I'm very interested to revisit Portrait of Ruin and Order of Ecclesia, which I don't remember as clearly, and Symphony of the Night, which I remember loving...and then loathing the inverted castle. Still, it's been >10 years, so who knows how things will hit these days.

Has anyone else played (or replayed) these Castlevania games recently? What were your thoughts?

Lately, I've noticed that during small group discussions in professional settings, especially in virtual meetings, I have a tendency to contribute additional thoughts after someone else shares something. My colleagues are often quiet which leads to awkward silences between topics, and I feel that for the discussion to flow smoothly, there needs to be some form of response or reciprocity to what was said. So, I often take on the role of expanding upon others' points, even if what I say doesn't add much. I should note that, I myself am an introvert through and through, but these awkward silences still make me uncomfortable and it's kind of annoying to see a mute icon pop up when it's supposed to be an active conversation. I suppose this is a habit that carried over from my days of hosting Bible studies many years ago, where active participation was hard to come by. People don't often share, but when they do, it helps to have someone acknowledge it - in my opinion, at least. I similarly engage like this in D&D where, in roleplaying scenarios, I'd use my character to fill in the empty spaces of conversation between other players and the DM, even if it's just a simple response that wasn't explicitly necessary.

My question is: do people, including yourself, appreciate it when someone responds or adds to their point in this manner? I struggle to discern whether I'm actually facilitating the conversation or hogging it in an annoying way. I'm open to feedback or hearing from your experiences.

I have been looking forward to this month, since I think it is the first time I haven't seen any of the movies before. The theme is Cannes and we start with Guillermo del Toro's Pan's Labyrinth which premiered at Cannes in 2006 and received a 22 minute standing ovation.

IMDb
Letterboxd
Wikipedia

Besides any thoughts on this movie, are you familiar with other of the Guillermo del Toro's filmography?

The rest of the schedule for May is:

• 13th: The Zone of Interest
• 20th: Luxury Car
• 27th: The Tree of Life

Editor's note: posting a bit late, sorry.

Albums typically release on Fridays. This is a thread to discuss week of May 03, 2024 releases that have recently arrived on our doorstep, or been announced for the future. Feel free to share albums, singles, EPs or reissues that have caught your eye and interest, or share your thoughts about any new music that you've had the chance to listen to this week. I suppose let's try to keep the focus mostly on stuff that was released or announced this week, since we already have a "What have you been listening to?" thread.

Discussion Points
Is there anything you've been looking forward to listening to?
Any releases that have surprised you?
Have you listened to any new music recently? What are your thoughts?
What have you enjoyed from these artists in the past? How does their latest work compare?

Links:
Pitchfork - Out This Week
AllMusic - All New Releases
Stereogum - New Music
Shreddit Release Tracker
New Metal and Hardcore Releases - Lambgoat
Heavy Metal Album Release Calendar - Heavy Music HQ
Upcoming albums - Encyclopaedia Metallum: The Metal Archives

Fellow PC builders, here's a fun one for you.

I took some "old" and no-longer-used PC parts and built my sister-in-law a gaming PC for her and her stepdaughter to use. It was a Christmas gift so the stepdaughter could play the Sims.

She has called me three times to tell me it's completely frozen - like hard locked, dead freeze, screen is displaying the last frame it was on but you can't interact with the PC in any way until you reset it with the power button.

She let it sit for an hour before she gave up. Two times this happened while stepdaughter was playing the Sims 4 and once it happened while my brother-in-law was watching YouTube videos.

Obviously, I went through the usual things you'd think in this situation and I had her bring the PC over so I could do some digging. Fully expecting to find a hardware issue, I tried the following:

1. I ran the Sims while also watching multiple YouTube videos in the background. Couldn't replicate the issue after about two hours.

2. I obviously checked the temperatures while gaming and YouTubing, checked the usual performance metrics and everything was great.

3. Ran OTTC stress tests - all of them. Under heavy loads, this thing was doing fine. Even at 100% utilization, the memory, graphics card, and cpu were fine. Did a power test too, fine. Did a "combined" stress test and all was fine.

4. Ran mem86, no issues with the memory, no bad sectors or errors.

5. Played Skyrim on ultra for several hours. This was a really fun way to troubleshoot.

6. Checked the event log from the day she had freezes. I can see where the event happened because leading up to the unexpected "power off" event, there were a ton of events related to various processes timing out. Seems like it was unable to connect with services and run certain background processes while it was frozen? I didn't see anything that really stood out to me as being a possible cause except...

7. in the event viewer, there were a few events related to Microsoft family safety. I set this up at the request of SIL so stepdaughter wouldn't get into anything she shouldn't. In the Event Viewer, it seems like maybe it wasn't verifying something correctly or didn't have permissions it needed? Upon Googling, I found some other folks with this error but I couldn't find anything about whether it caused freezing or not. Seems like one of the many events that just gives a warning but doesn't have any effect. One guy who had this issue had his computer freeze but disabling the family safety entirely did nothing. People in the comments thought it probably wasn't related. I also found another event that Google wasn't very helpful with. Might have been related to sound card but my sound card drivers are up to date and again, I have not been able to replicate the issue even when gaming and watching videos, so I don't know if it's related.

8. I ran the Windows System Files Checker and found no issues related to my Windows install.

I can't figure out why this would be happening only at her house. She says it froze after one hour of use every time. This brings me to the title of this post. My SIL moved into a really old house with sketchy wiring. My FIL told her the wiring is so bad that she needs to get it fixed immediately or risk a fire, so she's working on that. This house has a butler stairway, asbestos, and plaster/lathe walls if that tells you what we're dealing with here. This is the ONLY thing I can think of that would possibly be different between the two setups and maybe explain the freezing, but it just seems so unlikely to me that this is the cause.

Help?

Please bear with me as I'm not terribly sure if this is the right place for this, if I'm phrasing it right, or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.

I work at a childcare center - a private school marketed as "the best in the area". By most metrics, we are exactly that. I've worked here for nearly 15 years in a variety of roles, namely as a prek teacher for over half of that time. I have a good relationship with my directors and the schools owners, despite some issues in the past (I'm eager to champion more rights and privileges for employees).

This week was the sickest I have been in years, and it was the same for several other staffers as well. We couldn't call in, however, because none of us had fevers, vomiting, or diarrhea (the "big three" for what's acceptable to call in for). We all had flu-like symptoms, though those of us who went to the doctor tested negative for anything. Dozens of students had been getting ill with STREP, Influenza A/B, and Fifths in the weeks prior. It just took its time in reaching the staff!

I co-teach in my class and my co-teacher and I both lost our voices for days. Others had full-body aches, tremendous coughing fits, extreme lethargy... It was terrible. However, almost none of us got the time off that we needed to recover. Why? Staffing. The owners/directors don't want to close a room due to illness, even if both teachers in the room are horrendously sick. I spent days with the kids, barely able to talk or move, just trying to get through the day. My coworkers were the same.

Does that seem right?

The directors/owners essentially picked those who were deemed "sickest" to take a day off. While in the moment I understand that decision, it doesn't seem like a terribly good way to handle it either. I want to bring up my grievances about this with the owners (I already have with the directors, they don't disagree with me but "that's just the way it is") but I also know that showing up with a problem and no solution won't go over well. I also know they don't want to close a classroom at all costs, which is my preferred solution. The last time one was closed was when 5/6 teachers in another room had COVID simultaneously and we were mandated to close the room.

Anyone have any thoughts? Even if it's to show me a side I may not be considering here? Thank you for your insight.

I aspire to better equip myself as a researcher and writer. As part of this, for me at least, I think that developing a note-taking (or marginalia) system would be useful. I read a ton of nonfiction and have especially been into history, economics, and geopolitics lately…but my “system” tends to just “highlight” insightful stuff in my Kindle and then…everything kinda falls off the map for me. I should probably start going back, reviewing the highlights, and making notes in a separate notebook/app/document for later research and writing purposes.

I thought it might be interesting to learn more about everyone’s reading/studying routine and specifically note-taking processes. I’m especially curious about those who blog/publish writings, and how they work to gather their thoughts and information as they are reading.

If you don’t mind sharing a bit about your note taking process or systems, here are some questions for discussion:

1. What is your process, generally? (Do you read print/digital/audio? Does your note taking change depending on different formats? Do you highlight with specific colors for certain reasons? What do you find yourself notating most frequently?)

2. Do you use pen/paper or is there a specific app you like to use for note-taking/research purposes?

3. If you use an app, what is your process for book notes? Do you take notes on paper and then transfer it to the digital app later when you’re reviewing? Do you take notes directly into the app?

4. Any other advice for someone looking to improve their learning/knowledge through more focused and intentional reading and note taking?