As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

I had been having pain in my "upper butt" when sitting for a few weeks, so I went to an orthopedic practice that has urgent care walk in hours. He diagnosed it as sacroiliac inflammation and gave me an anti-inflammatory (meloxicam) and a PT script. The PT did not have an opening until week after next, but the medicine has has really helped with the pain.

Them took xrays during my visit, and the side-looking one shows spondylolisthesis (one of my lumbar vertebrae has slipped forward). He pointed it out (casually) and didn't say much about it other than he thought it wasn't the cause of my pain. Maybe he thought I already knew about it?

I have been having lower back pain off and on for a long time. I went to my doctor one time, and he diagnosed it as a bulging disc. He had given me some meloxicam and strengthening exercises to do at home. Since then, I would have pain in my lower back intermittently as well as occasional numbness in my leg, but I had just assumed it was a disc and tried to keep strengthening my core.

I am overweight (280lb) and not very active (software engineer). I started a new job that is in office this year, so I'm a lot less sedentary than I was working from home. I have a fantastic yoga teacher, and I do that every week. My practice in between classes has been intermittent at best, but I am trying to make it more regular.

Right now, I'm waiting for the PT to start, and I have a followup appointment with the spine specialist at the ortho in a fee weeks.

My biggest problem is that whenever I think about the xray, and seeing that disc so misaligned, my anxiety really spikes to 11. I get the "heebie jeebies", the same creepy shivering feeling I get if a bug unexpectedly crawls on me. It's happening most days. I feel kind of betrayed by my body.

I have talked to my therapist about the anxiety, and we are working on it. But in the mean time it is very stressful and distracting.

If you made it this far, thank you for reading. I am not sure what I'm really asking for. There's plenty of information online about the treatments. I guess I am wondering if other people went through it, how did it affect your mobility, quality of life, etc? Are there things you wish you had known?

Honestly, I think I could just use a (virtual) hug.

Many of us were dinosaur kids (I assume), but I know that our understanding of dinos has changed a lot from my childhood: more feathers, warm-blooded, and the brontosaurus survived its deletion attempt! Land Before Time, Dinotopia, We're Back! a Dinosaur's Story, Dinosaurs, and Jurassic Park have been supplemented by Jurassic World, Velocipastor, and many dinosaur "documentaries".

So Tildarianitearinis, what is your favorite dinosaur?

(For purposes of this question dinosaurs will be inclusive of prehistoric archosaurs without pedantry. Aka pterosaurs count. )

Breathe Deep Seek Peace Ψ

Hey, tildes - cqns here.

I know tildes ain't never do me no wrong (apologies for the heavy colloquialism), but I've been working off and on with a worldbuilding project for the past decade and a half. Some four years ago, I finally hunkered down and created a world map completely from scratch. Due to my extraordinarily high standards, I couldn't help but slowly figure out that there was a lot of things wrong with it after I went through the effort of making it, so I ended up redoing it several times over with additions and subtractions, still feeling like there was something missing.

Turns out, my hunch was correct. Long story short, I found a website called World Orogen that procedurally generates a planet within a certain degree of "realism". Tweaking some settings, I came across a design that was good enough for working on outside of the website, in which I was beset on another issue that quickly spiraled out of control, and I found myself completely out of my depth - map projections, which is a rabbit hole all on its own, and I could only understand the bare minimum basics, such as lat/lon, but that's pretty much the extent of my knowledge. Seriously.

Undertaking this next phase of the project would eventually (and I do say "eventually" because I haven't even gotten around to it yet) lead me to making individual isolated continent maps like how one would find in an atlas. I have asked the Orange Alien Website for tips on r/mapmaking, and while I did get some nudges in the right direction, I'm still attempting to wrap my head around the programs they had suggested. QGIS and G.Projector being the areas of my focus. It's hard enough for me trying to fathom the extensive features of QGIS in general, and as for G.Projector, it comes with its own kind of clunkiness that I'm slowly getting used to. My ultimate question here is...how would I go about finding a map projection to ensure size and area accuracy (because both are apparently different) of all of my continents?

For reference, I have included the map in question so that if anyone wants to give it a go and offer up a solution.

Catbox Link

Apparently my private health insurance covers pharmacogenetics testing to find the best ADHD medication. What is it, is it legit? What's the company going to do with my cheek swabs? How do doctors feel about me going up to them and say hey internet pharma bro tells me I should be taking this instead of what your years of medical school thinks.

What I can't figure out is how my insurance company benefits from this. I'm not paying extra for this service so I must be the product right? Here's part of the marketing FAQ info from my insurance provider:

Personalized Medicine uses advanced pharmacogenetic testing and pharmacist assistance to find the most effective medication for you.

If you’re starting a new medication for a mental health condition (such as anxiety or depression), chronic pain, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), or neurological conditions – or taking a medication for one of these conditions and it’s not working or causing side effects – Personalized Medicine could help. It’s offered through your extended health care benefits plan, so the cost of the test may be covered. To see the list of drugs tested, click here.

It involves a pharmacogenetic test. This is a type of test that identifies how you may respond to medications. Your test results are only for you and anyone you give consent to share them with, such as your doctor. The test is run by Personalized Prescribing Inc., a Canadian company. Manulife

(Forgot to mention this is for a Canadian employment extended health insurance.)

Preface: I know not what I talk about.

INSTANCE: A Unifi network with multiple VLANs, each with their own subnet. A Linux client that is assigned to a single VLAN, connected to the network via Wi-Fi, and running a full-tunnel Wireguard config which tunnels data to the provider's endpoints.

QUESTION: While running full-tunnel VPN configurations supplied by a commercial VPN provider, how might the client device talk with other devices on the same (local!) LAN as it is, including devices that are on a different (local!) VLAN, and thus a different subnet?

Let's say, for instance, that I have the following network architecture:

Name        Subnet          Gateway     Mask
Internal    10.0.0.0/24     10.0.0.1    255.255.255.0
Hosted      10.5.0.0/24     10.5.0.1    255.255.255.0
Private     10.5.1.0/24     10.5.1.1    255.255.255.0
Guests      10.5.2.0/24     10.5.2.1    255.255.255.0

I have a device that is connected to the network via Wi-Fi, and is contained within the "Private" VLAN. It can also talk to devices that are in the "Internal" VLAN (by necessity), and devices in the "Hosted" VLAN.

Once I spin the VPN up, using a configuration gained from OVPN / PIA / NordVPN / whatever, the client can still communicate with devices on the same VLAN as it- for example, if the client is 10.5.1.132, it can still communicate with 10.5.1.42, but it cannot communicate with, say, 10.5.0.11. One would assume that is because the DHCP server has told it that it can access devices within a specific range through the correct gateway- and in-fact, this shows in the IP routing table:

Kernel IP routing table
Destination     Gateway         Genmask         Flags Metric Ref    Use Iface
default         unifi.localdoma 0.0.0.0         UG    1024   0        0 eth0
10.5.1.0        0.0.0.0         255.255.255.0   U     1024   0        0 eth0
unifi.localdoma 0.0.0.0         255.255.255.255 UH    1024   0        0 eth0

There are, as far as I can tell, a number of solutions for this problem. The first is to not use a full-tunnel VPN, and instead build a set of AllowedIPs which carve out the LAN ranges which you do not want tunneled. This, I think, is known as a split-tunnel VPN. If one wants to carve out all of the possible LAN IP ranges, as specified in RFC1918, it starts to become somewhat cumbersome:

AllowedIPs = 0.0.0.0/5, 8.0.0.0/7, 11.0.0.0/8, 12.0.0.0/6, 16.0.0.0/4, 32.0.0.0/3, 64.0.0.0/2, 128.0.0.0/3, 160.0.0.0/5, 168.0.0.0/6, 172.0.0.0/12, 172.32.0.0/11, 172.64.0.0/10, 172.128.0.0/9, 173.0.0.0/8, 174.0.0.0/7, 176.0.0.0/4, 192.0.0.0/9, 192.128.0.0/11, 192.160.0.0/13, 192.169.0.0/16, 192.170.0.0/15, 192.172.0.0/14, 192.176.0.0/12, 192.192.0.0/10, 193.0.0.0/8, 194.0.0.0/7, 196.0.0.0/6, 200.0.0.0/5, 208.0.0.0/4, 224.0.0.0/3

This might be the only solution that currently works on an Android device running the basic Wireguard APK, as found on Github.

An alternative solution is to carve out the LAN ranges you want to avoid routing through the tunnel using the PostUp/PostDown entries. For example:

PostUp = ip route add 10.5.0.0/16 via 10.5.1.1 [dev IFNAME?] [metric INT?]
PostDown = ip route del 10.5.0.0/16 via 10.5.1.1

This would work, on your local LAN, as long as you stay on the same VLAN and can connect to the correct gateway. Unfortunately, Android Wireguard cannot handle PostUp/PostDown entries, AFAICT. Small bother.

One final solution that I have heard mutterings about is known as "Classless Static Routes", or DHCP Option 121/249. This uses "CIDR" notation, and I'll be honest- here I am a little bit lost. I like the sound of this solution, as it means that I can configure the networking infrastructure itself to provide the required information for valid routing, and not have to faff about with the many, many Wireguard configurations on my devices.

Does anybody have any experience with this problem? Am I approaching this problem in an entirely stupid way? Is there a better way (insert infomercial here)?

Hello tilderinos,

I'd like to launch my tab manager soon and to ensure a smooth launch, I'm looking for early users who would be willing to try my app as part of the private beta.

For those who would actually need this product, I'm happy to offer one year free (or more!), but even if you don't need it, I'd really appreciate the help.

I don't really need anything fancy, I'd just like to have some people install the app and try it to know if it works properly for them or if any unexpected issues come up, especially major ones. I'd like to make sure that the actual launch will be smooth, especially considering that I've been working on this project for four years now. It'd be a shame if it all went to waste.

Thanks a lot in advance!

PS - I wasn't sure in which group to post

I’ve bought enough digital comic bundles now that they’re starting to take up a decent chunk of storage space.

What I’d love to do, if possible, is losslessly compress them all down to their minimum sizes, in the same way that FLAC does with music. Is this a thing? And if so, what’s the best way to do it?

If lossless compression isn’t possible, is there a lossy compression that’s effectively lossless in that I won’t be able to tell the difference anyway? Lossless compression gives me good piece of mind, but the storage savings from an invisible lossy one are honestly quite appealing too.

My hypoglycemia issues are not related to diabetes fwiw. That said, I tend to get hypoglycemia a few times a day. If I catch it quick enough and treat, it's usually not a big deal, but if I get too low (maybe once I get into the 50s mg/dl), then after treating (usually about 15 minutes later), I get so. freaking. tired. Like, barely able to stand up exhausted. Currently dealing with this as we speak, and it's very frustrating. My endocrinologist told me it's normal to get tired like this while recovering. I'm curious if anyone else deals with this? If so, do you have any advice for dealing with the fatigue?

Tildes might be too small of a platform for this. If no one deals with hypoglycemia here, please feel free to remove it. I thought with the prevalence of diabetes, it would be likely there are folks who encounter this.

EDIT: In case anyone ever stumbles on this, turns out it was an insulinoma. I finally had surgery. Don't give up hope, answers can be out there, even if you feel like there's no where left to look.

With all of the identity verification laws in the pipeline, data breaches, and government overreach (mandated monitoring in new cars in the US), what steps can the average person take to secure their anonymity and data and device privacy?

I’m a tech-savvy person but nowhere near the level of a great many. It seems like in the face of overwhelming odds, making small changes is only a drop in the bucket. I have all the data encryption settings enabled on my phone, but I use services like Dropbox and rely on it heavily. I’ve always thought that if the product is free, you’re the product…but I pay for Dropbox, so they shouldn’t use my data for training AI (but they likely are). Setting up a personal cloud seems like a daunting task, as is getting involved in any of the small projects that people have going (decentralized networks, mesh…things, P2P, etc). I’ve focused more on securing my home networks recently so my Ubiquiti devices are restricted in what they can access, but I haven’t actually pen-tested my network yet. I have PopOS! installed on my home desktop because I got tired of Windows’ invasive…everything, but ultimately I don’t know what I’m doing.

There’s probably a great many people out there that feel like it’s hopeless to try to do anything because it won’t matter as there’s such a heavy push to invade, restrict, and monetize our digital lives. What can the average person do to take control of our devices and data?

Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

Does anyone here have experience with Ruby programming? More specifically mRuby or DragonRuby for game programming?

I came across DragonRuby as free for its 7th anniversary and I’m considering checking it out, but I have no experience with the Ruby programming language itself.

Most of my programming experience recently is in C# and Python, but I have some experience with JavaScript/TypeScript.

Does anyone know of good resources for learning Ruby coming from that background, or thoughts on if it is worth it to try to pick up?

I’m not really interested in LLM-based Ruby workflows, at least until I have a decent grasp of the language and syntax myself.

This can be contentious, so feel free to self-categorize as "fresh twist on" as well if you wish 😅

(edit) moved my pick to the comment section ...

I really don't know where to put this, so feel free to move, but I have this issue. I carry a LOT of shit on my keychain. Two sets of keys of four each, a SIM removal tool, a tiny retractable box cutter, a USB drive full of installer ISOs (you never know), an AirTag, a CPU with a hole punched through, a 3D printed whistle, and that may very well grow.

Now the problem I have is that the lanyard that I currently have has, over time, widened the gap on the karabiner to the point that I'll regularly lose a key ring in my pocket when pulling it out. Nothing major's happened yet, but it's a matter of time.

So, clearly, I need a better one. A higher quality one. But going on the eTailers of today I really only get garbage. A pack of 20! For ten bucks! Well, thanks, but we all know they'll suck. And frankly, I really don't know how to get my hands on a high quality one. I bet they're out there, I'm sure, but where do I look? What's good, what's bad? I really don't need the high-end climbing gear, or do I? Is my key lanyard a candidate for buy it for life, and if so, am I ready for that commitment?

Looking for any and all advice on this.

PS: I don't wear the lanyard. I'm one of those assholes that puts the active end in my pocket and lets the lanyard itself dangle out.

What have you been watching and reading this week? You don't need to give us a whole essay if you don't want to, but please write something! Feel free to talk about something you saw that was cool, something that was bad, ask for recommendations, or anything else you can think of.

If you want to, feel free to find the thing you're talking about and link to its pages on Anilist, MAL, or any other database you use!

As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

Finale of season 4 spoilers here. You have been warned that people will discuss spoilers here. Don't blame me if you are spoiled of things that happen all the way to the end of season 4, which premiered today.

Anybody else watch the Season 4 Finale and just blown away by how it ended? I was NOT expecting a full PTSD Mark episode to end with him agreeing to let Thragg use the planet as a breeding planet. Its such a smart, awful way to have him make a morally compromised decision and come to terms with Thragg. Also the mid credits scene of Allan being told to use the Scourge virus! Amazing television and i can't wait to see what they do next.

Edit: thank you to whomever added the tags for me. I am usually just a lurker and appreciate someone flagging this post appropriately! I was too excited to get my post up and see what people had to say!

Hello,

I have quite some technical question and my DuckDuckGo-fu seems very weak on this one. I hope it is ok to post questions on Tildes, as it is not really discussion material... but someone can still learn and use whatever come from this.

I have Live Aid concert that I ripped from my DVDs and I wanted to merge the individual video files (there are four) into one long video. I'm on Linux and I'm used to ffmpeg in command line, though I do not know it that much. Each of the input videos has its own chapters and I would like to transfer those chapters into the final video as well. Preferably adding a chapter in between every input video.

I was unable to find if ffmpeg allows for something like that in a single inline command. I may have to export chapters from each input video and add them into one "chapter" file and redo times by hand on them and then use this file as "chapter" input when merging the videos, but all this is just a theory on my part.

Is there some FFmpeg expert here who has done something like that?

EDIT: I made my own solution, see it in a comment a bit lower.

A few months ago someone posted an article on the male loneliness epidemic. I had shared my thoughts in the comments on that post. But I think that article and a lot of comments are under the impression that "redpill" content/ideology is still in vogue or relevant in today's world. It still has its followers and influencers for sure, but it's not at the forefront of cultural discussions anymore. To think otherwise is outdated, the redpill era died around 2022/2023 and was replaced by a more incel-derived "blackpill" era.

Thanks to TikTok, what was once relegated to niche internet forums became mainstream. The biggest influencer from this internet phenomenon is Clavicular, who is currently getting articles written about him in press outlets such as The Hollywood Reporter and People.

I am no stranger to talking about looks (side note: I would have taken more time to write that out and discuss broader topics, such as "types," if I had known it would have gotten as much attention as it did). And I have been around looksmaxxxing spaces on the internet since about 2022. I'll try to make this as brief and simple as I can.

What is the blackpill?

The blackpill is a deterministic outlook on life. It states that your genetics determines the quality of your life, and if you were not born with advantageous bone structure and height, then "it was over before it even started." You won't be successful in life, you won't find love, and you will end up a lonely, pathetic person wishing you'd been born looking better.

How does this differ from the redpill?

The redpill has some overlap with the blackpill. Both believe that men are the true victims of society. That feminism has been detrimental, this and that, and the other. The redpill, however, insinuates that you can self-improve. There's almost zero focus on improving looks, and it's almost entirely focused on making money and increasing your status.

A core belief of the redpill is that all women are gold diggers, and in order to get laid, you need to make a ton of money. The blackpill does not entirely dispute this, but it does say that if a woman chooses you for money, she will never actually love you. And that you are paying a lot of money for affection and attention that an attractive man gets for free.

I think that explanation in and of itself should show you the difference between the two.

What's looksmaxxxing? Are looksmaxxxing and the blackpill interchangeable terms?

They are not.

Looksmaxxxing is what guys do to look better, to increase their rankings on the looks scale. So that they can start getting laid (primarily) or start to "mog" (i.e., outshine everyone in a room).

In certain blackpill spaces looksmaxxxing is seen as cope, since, again, your life was determined by genetics and there's nothing you can do to fix this.

You might think looksmaxxxing consists of losing body fat, getting a skin care routine, dressing nicely, hygiene, and cologne. And that is part of it, all of that stuff is considered "softmaxxxing" but there's also "hardmaxxxing" as in surgeries and other more serious treatments such as steroids and peptides (which technically occupy a grey area between soft and hard maxxxing). An example of a popular surgery is double jaw surgery, here's the subreddit for it so you can see examples. If your jaw was not properly developed and you have a recessed chin (or a pushed-in chin), then a double jaw surgery is something you can do that would greatly increase your attractiveness. Although it does carry quite a bit of risk. There are other surgeries that people do on their eyes, their noses, ear pinning, there's a lot.

It is essentially a belief that your best investment is going to be in how you look. It's a bit of a running joke that instead of going to college, you should invest in plastic surgery, and that will do more to make your life better than a degree.

How do they view women? How do they view themselves?

The belief is that women are hypergamous. That they will only want to date up, and it's significantly easier for women to date and get laid, even if they are below average looking. And that even an above average looking man will have trouble since they aren't the holy grail of attractiveness.

Here's a brief explanation of their rating system.

• Sub-5

5 is considered average; sub-5 means below average. Not even that you don't get attention but that you get negative attention from the people around you.

• Low-Tier Normie / Low-Tier Becky
• Mid-Tier Normie / Mid-Tier Becky
• High-Tier Normie / High-Tier Becky

The "normie" categories are all average categories. Ranging from on the low side of average (LTN) to above average (HTN). The High Tier categories are where a lot of attractive actors sit, think romcom leads, the boy/girl next door types.

• Chad/Stacy

Essentially unobtainable beauty. Taylor Hill or Henry Cavill.

Depending on who you're talking to, someone would say that "life starts at HTN" or that life doesn't exist unless you're "Chad." And that if you're anything below that, you might as well not even exist.

How did it get popular?

The first instance most people probably heard of it was likely in 2014 when Elliot Rodger committed a mass shooting at a University. He was a member of a looksmaxxxing forum (the original looksmaxxxing forum, I believe), which led to the site being shut down and thus delaying any chance of its popularity. If you go back and watch and read what Elliot Rodger believed, it makes more sense in today's context now that this thought process has been more normalized.

In 2023, TikTok started promoting this content. Primarily from "edits" here's an example and coinciding with that were also the rise of a few influencers. All leading up to Clavicular, and how dominant he is on social media (thanks in part to funding from Peter Thiel). He was a kid posting on looksmaxxxing forums, was a micro celebrity in the niche, became a slightly bigger internet celebrity on TikTok before streamers started bringing him on leading to his insane fame.

Conclusion

Going back to the initial tildes post that I linked to. That whole thing was essentially saying, if you're just a good person, then someone will want to date you or fall in love with you or want to have sex with you or whatever. And I think part of the reason why looksmaxxxing stuff has taken off is that it feels more honest. It's not coddling you, and if you do improve your looks, you're going to see better results in dating than if you read feminist literature or something. So the takeaway ends up being that one of these places was telling me the truth.

Like, on a broader scale, it's a response to the body positivity stuff from the 2010s. When everyone was being told that it's okay if you're obese, it's healthy, it's beautiful. And there was just kind of a sense of performance to all of it.
The effort to change what people are attracted to, or to shame people for not being attracted to a certain thing. Has it gone too far? Probably, but I think that's why it took off initially and why it grew so quickly.

I obviously have my own personal experience about this, and so I very obviously know that it's not just what's inside that counts. Normal everyday people will make assumptions about you based on the way that you look. And I don't think it's a morally wrong thing to acknowledge that it happens, nor do I think it's a morally righteous thing to pretend like it doesn't.

The survey has been closed and the results are in!

Thank you to all the 324 people that responded! It was honestly a bigger number than I was expecting so I'm really happy with how it turned out. :D Here are some stats that I can put in Markdown:

• 34 years old is the median age
• We have lived a combined 11615 years
• And the generational breakdown with:
  • Millennials at 59.0%
  • Gen Z at 26.9%
  • Gen X at 12.3%
  • Baby Boomer at 1.5%
  • Greatest Generation at 0.3% not sure if this one is legit ;)

View the full results here

• Tip: You can set a custom age range using the "Set age range" filter to get a better view of results! All the graphs update along with that filter.
• Or get a ZIP download here of the data

Let me know your thoughts about the survey, what you liked, what you didn't like, if you'd like something different about them, you name it!

Thank you all again for participating! I hope to see you in the next survey. :)

I don’t know if anyone is interest in mesh networks like MeshCore. I have been dabbling in it, and it’s an interesting concept of distributed LoRa radios making a community network.
There has been some recent drama with MeshCore where in a nutshell there has been a disagreement over control of the project and probably ultimately money.

If anyone else uses MeshCore (or meshtastic), what has your experience of it been? What are your thoughts about the future of the project with the drama? I don’t think it will be a big deal, I suspect it will blow over without a large fracture but it’s very much a guess rather than considered view.

Hello all, long time listener, first time poster. First time poster because this is a throwaway account as it will have more personal info included than I'd like linked to my main account. The point of this post is to request guidance/advice/ideas from the always incredible, intelligent, and helpful people of Tildes.

The high level points:

1. I am a female 40 year old, for lack of a better phrase, starving artist living in the US. I am single, live alone with my cat in an apartment, and have no debt.
2. I have not held a steady/normal job in over a decade (mental health being a primary reason), my personal income has come from a couple of very small business ventures where I make things by hand, some freelance graphic design, the generosity of friends, and pet sitting. The latter is dead in the water as all my pets were in another state and I just moved in the last 30 days to a place that is much smaller and simply will not have the customer base to do the same, nor am I all that interested in pursuing it here.
3. My primary method of financial support over the last decade was being the homemaker to my now-ex husband up until about two years ago when he informed me he no longer wished to be my husband. Since then my primary financial support was from my now-deceased father, who generously provided me with $2,500 per month to subsist on, with my previously mentioned ventures closing the finances gap as much as possible.
4. Over the decade of being in a single income household and for the last two years subsisting off a "guaranteed" income of $30,000 per year I managed to learn to be extremely frugal wherever possible so as to not spend above my means and keep a roof over my head. I eat once per day, my overall health isn't great but I am attempting to address that, and thus far my "retail therapy" budget to give me a little boost of dopamine has been $50 per month that is generally spent in thrift stores. I wouldn't call it living so much as I'd call it surviving and am often unsure why I bother.

The issue/question at hand:
My father has passed away and with him my primary/only means of support, with his passing I have inherited just over $500,000 in a Traditional IRA. So my primary question is how to minimize tax burden and maximize return on his investments to make them last as long as possible while I figure out the next stage of my life.

I am not opposed to getting a normal/steady job, but this is more difficult to obtain than one would imagine with a decade long gap in employment and an unwillingness to sacrifice the mental health gains I have made and gestures broadly everything else that is going on. There is also the bit of freedom that this amount of money provides that will perhaps allow me to double down on my small business ventures, investing in them/myself at a level that I was unable to do prior and therefore enabling them to become a primary source of support. So there is a thought of setting a budget, both monetary and time, to allow myself to try to grow my businesses first.

TLDR: Single, solo, poor, woman gets $500k pre-tax, how to make the most of it?

Some of you may remember me from another thread, where I hemmed and hawed and fretted my way through trying to navigate my struggling relationship. I thought I'd reached the final chapter, I moved out and established a place for my child and myself. I cut as many ties as I could with my now ex, but of course several threads still remain.

Yesterday (April Fools of course) I found out that they had been cheating on me since last May, at least. Potentially longer. Of course, I'm devastated. I knew they had found someone else already recently, but I thought it was in the last month or two. This new piece of the puzzle has solved so many unanswered questions I've had, while also creating many new ones.

I feel used, financially/emotionally abused, gaslit, and more. I'm still working on processing everything. I'm trying to remain calm for the sake of the kids (especially mine) but it's really, really hard. I know it isn't a reflection on me - I tried everything I could to fix things. It is hard however not feel that utter sense of betrayal in my gut and soul like a knife.

What resources, reading, supports, guides are there for this? I'm just trying to get through today and then I have a three day weekend to work on processing this all.

Have you watched any movies recently you want to discuss? Any films you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

So with the Paramount acquisition, all the new HP content, and the general state of both TV and Movie ownership are people returning to the high seas?

I was an eager participant of the first and second wave of piracy in the early and late 00s, and considering the re-consolidation of the entertainment industry and the seemingly nefarious acquisitions of late, I am considering hoisting the black flag once again. I guess this post has two objectives: 1. how are other people navigating our changing media landscape, and 2. for those who have stayed immersed in piracy or have returned to it how have things changed in the last decade or so. Obviously Megavideo and Putlocker are no more, so are there directions to point folks who are just getting back to it. This can be streaming, torrenting, anything really.

Caveat: Let's not even give the horrible human that is JK airtime. I mentioned HP because folks might want to indulge without supporting but if we can keep the discussion to piracy that would be awesome!

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like infowars, framework.laptop 13 and web.small. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was studious.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

What are your favourite go-to songs at karaoke? Trying to steal ideas from you guys before I go next time.

Any "tradition" or customs you and your friends came up with? Example, I like ending the night with Bohemian Rhapsody because it's super late and we're too tired to be shy, there's a lot of different (non repetitive) lyrical sections, and, tradition.

Modern karaoke places are pretty affordable these days , and have a good selection of songs. If you've never been or haven't in a long time, would love to encourage you to go try and report back your thoughts.

This is a recurring post to discuss programming or other technical projects that we've been working on. Tell us about one of your recent projects, either at work or personal projects. What's interesting about it? Are you having trouble with anything?

This topic is part of a series. It is meant to be a place for users to discuss creative projects they have been working on.

Projects can be personal, professional, physical, digital, or even just ideas.

If you have any creative projects that you have been working on or want to eventually work on, this is a place for discussing those.

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

I sold off my last ICE car almost a decade ago, moved to the EU, and I've subsisted on public transportation ever since. Never thought I'd even consider buying another one.

However, the last year or so, I've been anticipating needing to buy a car, at least temporarily (the next 2-4 years or so), and I was just starting to semi-seriously window-shop EVs over here (in Germany), when the whole Iran thing started.

Now, I'm not sure, but I'm starting to think that it might be a good idea to buy a cheap used petrol or diesel car, use it, then re-sell it in a couple of years after I'm done with it (assuming it's still worth anything at that point).

I'm targeting a purchase somewhere around 3-6 months from now, and in the 3,000-6,000 Euro price range. I'd happily go higher for an EV, but not the literally 4x higher (15,000-20,000 Euros minimum) that I'd need to shell out for even a barely feasible new EV. I might or might not be eligible for a decent ~5k Euro govt subsidy on a new EV -- but my 15-20k estimate is assuming I get the 5k discount, which I might not qualify for anything at all.

My thinking is that decent used ICE vehicles are about to become very cheap and easy to find, while good used EVs are going to become vanishingly rare, and new ones are well beyond my target price range. And yeah, gas/diesel prices are nuts right now, and I know they're not coming down any time soon. Even if the war magically ends tomorrow, it'll be a gradual, months-long decline in prices to--let's face it--a couple years before we see pre-war prices again, if ever.

Very roughly speaking, my use-case is going to be infrequent, intermittent, high-intensity usage. Like, the car may be parked for one month, then I'll add 3000-4000 km to it the next month, then parked again for a month or two, etc. So even before, I was anticipating some difficulties with charging the EV during the long-distance high-usage periods. Now, even with the fuel price hike, I'm thinking it's a better deal for me to go with a dino car.

Thoughts?

I've been thinking on this for a while, and was inspired to ask about it while reading through the blackpill thread. I don't intend to actually look for a relationship for a while; it's been six months since the breakup, and my ex and I didn't agree to no-contact until two days ago, so I still have a long healing process to get through. But I have a lot of... dread? around not having a life partner forever, with the key factor being not having a close friend like my ex was pre-relationship. If I could emotionally and financially handle all life matters on my own that would be beautiful, but even just thinking about getting to the place I want to be financially while still maintaining a certain lifestyle is anxiety-inducing on its own. So again, even as I do not actively prepare to download any app and put myself out there, I'd like to take some notes as someone who has never used an app and whose previous relationships were by chance (classmates while in school, ex was from MMO).

For starters: I'm a cis woman, early 30s, and identify as lesbian, demisexual, demiromantic. I don't know where I am on the scale of conventional attractiveness. I'm extremely short and skinny. I've never really gone through the initial "dating" process (I knew my exes before getting in a relationship with them so we kind of jumped into being exclusive/"official").

The demi- bits mean a lot to me. I feel it makes sense to just seek spaces for activities that I enjoy and go on from there, but I feel like it's a difficult numbers game because statistically most people will be straight, right? And I don't think I exude any non-straight energy either, if that's even a thing. So this brings me to why I feel I inevitably will need to use dating apps - I fear the environment, I have never applied makeup on myself and couldn't tell you the difference between mascara and eyeliner without Googling, and the blackpill thread is filled with commentary on how these apps really cultivate a landscape with a focus on appearance. But simply being not-straight makes me feel I have to use an app for the basic filter of gender preference.

I don't see myself going to a gay bar (prefer not to drink). I can see some queer-friendly dating-focused events in my area that sound okay but I fear my issues with social performance will keep me away (I can perform for one person but the few events I see right now are speed-dating or casual mixers). Also some of them are hosted at wineries/pubs and I get that alcohol is normal, but I really don't like the vibe of bars themselves (too loud).

I also don't know if there are... things to "know" when trying to date as a lesbian? Like when folks talk about being masc/femme, those things don't really mean anything to me - I have male-dominated hobbies and don't wear feminine clothing, but to say that any bit of me says "masculine" in any way just doesn't seem right. I also honest to god do not know what expectations are regarding trans women. I can't write them off as I've never dated or been romantically interested in a trans woman, but I do fear that the... equipment, for lack of better phrase... might matter to me, and I don't want to offend too late? Is it transphobic to say I'd prefer to date cis women?

Apologies as I realize that this is definitely becoming more of a ramble on "how date, I've never dated strangers" and less on advice for use of dating apps specifically. But at the end of the day, yes, I feel that I will need to use dating apps but fear the experiences that I read about from using them.

I'm having a lot of trouble creating an image of the city in my head and would like some help!

Any kind of image or graph is appreciated. Maps, artist renditions. Anything. Both for the city as a whole and the different locations within the city that Clarke describes.

But it must be accurate, or at least an attempt to be accurate (which is why I can't just use Google for this, since I lack the ability to distinguish between freestyle art and accurate ones).

Thanks!

Title.

This is my machine:

• OS: Windows 10
• Video editing software: Adobe Premiere
• Display (ED320QR S): 1920x1080 @ 144 Hz in 28" [External]
• CPU: AMD Ryzen 5 2400G (8) @ 3.60 GHz
• GPU: NVIDIA GeForce RTX 2060 12GB [Discrete]
• Memory: 64 GiB (7%)
• 1TB NVME SSD (I can't get the info right now on Linux, but it's a very good SSD)

I am looking into getting back into video editing for my personal projects.

My program of choice was and is Adobe Premiere.

So, how much has changed since then, and what is the best way for me to get up to speed? Do my knowledge and assumptions from 2014 more or less translate to current versions of Adobe Premiere? Should I use some other program instead? Are there any courses, summaries, or cheat sheets you would recommend?

I should probably clarify that going back to editing is a source of distress for me, since it was something I was too emotionally invested in back then, leading to a significant burnout. So I would like to overcome some of that emotional fragility by mapping the terrain a little bit before going back to it.

Back in the day, I used to love the courses on lynda.com. Something along those lines might help alleviate some of that anxiety.

Thanks!

I never really understood, and any definition I read, I just forget after a while. can someone explain in a way that I won't forget.

the water analogy doesn't help as I get confused between them. also, Watt is the most confusing for me shouldn't it with some unit of time ? like I could say how much water is flowing per second but just saying how much water is flowing without the time wouldn't be very useful, it could be seconds, minutes, hours. yet, the Watt is never written with respect to time, why is that?

What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

Ive been playing around with learning a lisp language for a while, and I recently decided to go for it and learn fennel (as I already am comfortable with lua) just to see if I like lisps as a class. Normally, I try to do the first 5-10 days of a previous advent of code to pick up a lang.

Setting up my advent of code environment got me wondering: what projects do other people use to learn new languages/tooling? Id love to hear how other people approach learning a new skill.

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

Hi,

I’m hoping to tap into the collective knowledge base. I have officially ‘run out’ of notes on my task/notes app Tick Tick. I had no idea this was a thing.

I prefer to avoid paying subscription fees so I’m looking for a pay once alternative that fits my needs.

Tick tick is primarily a task / to do list app but I use it more extensively for the notes feature. I value having different spaces for notes and being able to quickly see my notes tags when looking at lists of notes. I also use the countdown feature to know which events are coming up first and how many days away they are.

I use the notes to organise bookings I have for upcoming events. I use the tags system to quickly see if deposits have been paid and what category of booking the event is. I also value being able to import a template first to keep notes structured in the same way.

Another thing that works for me is that tick tick is available on Mac, iOS and Android. All platforms that I use.

If they had a pay once option I’d pay it but I work hard not to rely on too many subscriptions, perhaps naively in this economy.

If anyone has any suggestions for similar apps then I’d love to know your recommendations.

Thank you so much

Seriously!

My husband brought me a tiny little bubble wand he got as a party favor and it somehow has managed to provide me with hours of entertainment. It's kind of perfect for me because it gets me to stop thinking about all the shit I'm worried about and instead get out of my head. Here's some fun things to do if you're looking for a fun time.

Games you can play with bubbles

Bubble catcher

Catch bubbles with the wand. Try to get it directly in the loop for maximum fun.

Bubble bouncing

If you've made small enough bubbles, you can use a bubble you've caught to bounce other bubbles with! I notice that

Bubble multiplication

Catching a bubble on your wand re-establishes the surface area needed to blow bubbles with! Turn one bubble into 20!

Your homework

Go buy some bubbles and report back so I don't feel like a crazy person.