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    1. Organizing graphic design files

      hey there tildes— the job i’ve had for the past year has included heavy graphic design. i’ve never really done graphic design before so i’ve just been winging it and learning as i go. as time has...

      hey there tildes—

      the job i’ve had for the past year has included heavy graphic design. i’ve never really done graphic design before so i’ve just been winging it and learning as i go. as time has gone on and the projects have become more complicated, i wonder if there’s a standardized way of organizing complex (or complex to me at least) projects in Illustrator (or for me, Affinity Designer).

      one example— i create labels with 3-9 slight variations to be printed and attached to physical items (jars, in my case). these variations of the same design are roughly 75% the same, with the 25% being the “flavor” and associated text/colors. i also have to export as a layered pdf for the printing company since we don’t have the necessary equipment in-house.

      another example (more related to InDesign or in my case Affinity Publisher)— a product catalogue. there are something like 30 pages and it’s just a huge click-fest of layers and nested groups.

      are there any graphic designers here that have any insight on best practices when organizing large files or even practical ways to split up files?

      5 votes
    2. MTG - Building a collection

      TL; DR: how do I start building a collection cheaply with versatile/staple cards? A couple of friends have started playing Magic: The Gathering with a virtual tabletop, and while I have learned a...

      TL; DR: how do I start building a collection cheaply with versatile/staple cards?

      A couple of friends have started playing Magic: The Gathering with a virtual tabletop, and while I have learned a lot from playing Arena and reading cards (and watching the Prof) there's just something not working for me in the digital space; Archidekt is tough for me to read through, and even something like Tabletop Simulator doesn't work for me for learning the game (or rather...it's not sticking). I know that I do pretty well with physical objects, so I wanted to get some physical cards to get the hang of the game but immediately ran up against the cost.
      I don't know if you guys know this, but Magic: The Gathering is expensive. Way more expensive than I can justify for a hobby I've just started and haven't really gotten the hang of. My question is: how do I start building a collection without breaking the bank?

      The things I know, but might need to be corrected on:
      "Don't buy bulk"; apparently most boxes of bulk have a bunch of repeats and are generally the cards left over when the good ones have been extracted. I would love to be wrong about this, because even getting common/uncommon cards in enough volume to play in a physical space would be neat.
      "Buy singles"; it seems like this is a good way to spend $50-$1000 blindly in the dark if you don't know what you're doing.
      "Play what you enjoy"; I've played some jump-start decks and those are neat, but I haven't played enough to know what I like, making this difficult. I also haven't played enough to know the difference between what I enjoy because it's neat and what I enjoy because I won with it one time.
      "Buy a precon deck"; from what I've read the commander precons would be a good way to get a lot of single cards, but I've read/heard mixed things about them: reviewers discussing how to "fix" them to be good.
      "Buy jump start packs"; I would love to grab a bunch of the jump start decks to mess around with and find synergies, but how do you avoid getting repeats of the packs?
      "Buy the Foundations Starter Collection"; Foundations Starter Collection is apparently sold out (or only being sold used/resold at a higher price?), but seems exactly what I'm looking for: a decent collection of classic/useful cards that you can build with and supplement as you learn the game.
      "Look for garage sales or ebay for collections"; I'm pretty sure my chances of edging out an experienced card hunter on a good deal is slim to none, especially in my area.

      I would, in an ideal world, like to have a small collection with 300-500 of the cards that "everybody knows" for kitchen table Magic (fake draft/jump start, casual commander, casual...modern?), but this seems out of reach. Any guidance would be appreciated!

      16 votes
    3. North Korean Career Coaches

      I keep getting messages in my email inbox or LinkedIn like: Alexander > Hi, > I’m seeking a genuine partnership where only a USA software engineer can truly collaborate with me. > I value...

      I keep getting messages in my email inbox or LinkedIn like:

      Alexander
      > Hi, 
      > I’m seeking a genuine partnership where only a USA software engineer can truly collaborate with me. 
      > I value transparency and real results. 
      > Things to do are very simple and I guarantee 3K~10K/month income for you.
      > I’m ready to prove my credibility and discuss a win-win business. 
      > Thank you!
      
      Hello $their_name,
      
      Why do you need a USA engineer and what do I need to do?
      
      - $my_name
      
      > Thanks for reaching me out.
      > 
      > I run a software development team with five talented developers who specialize in frontend, backend, full stack, AI/ML and blockchain technologies. Although we have a strong team, we are struggling to find enough jobs right now. As you may know, the economy in Europe is tough and low salary as well, so we are trying to find more opportunities in the US and Canada. However, this is challenging for us because of time zone differences, language barriers, and many US clients preferring to hire local people like you.
      > 
      > To solve these issues, I'm actively looking for someone who can help us in getting more jobs in the US. Since you are a US citizen, you can create accounts on job platforms like Indeed, Dice, Upwork and Wellfound. I think you may have already heard about Upwork. It's a world famous freelancing platform. After setting up your accounts, if you allow me to use them, I will apply for jobs by myself. When I receive interview requests from clients, I will notify you so you can attend the meetings. During the interviews, I will support you by quickly sending you the right answers to any technical questions that come up.
      > 
      > Once we secure a job, our team will handle all the development work, including any test projects. We will share the profits from the work we do, with a split of 30% for you and 70% for our team.
      > In short, your role would be to connect with clients and help us secure jobs, while our team takes care of the technical work. This is a great opportunity for collaboration and growth.
      > 
      > And there is one thing I need to tell you about using your account. Several platforms have very strict policies with ip addresses. If i use your account on my own machine, your account will be risky because ip addresses are different. And also they detect VPN, VPS, and some cloud services as well. To address this, we need to use your spare laptop. I will use your account on your spare one using a remote desktop application like Anydesk. Anydesk is a secure and safe remote desktop application.
      
      Cuong
      > Greeting,
      > 
      > I hope this message finds you well. My name is Cuong, and I came across your information on your website ( WE need it ). I am excited to share that I have a potential long-term collaboration opportunity that I believe could be mutually beneficial.
      > 
      > We’re a fast-growing IT consulting company based in Malaysia, with a talented team experienced in web2, web3, mobile development, and AI. As we expand into the U.S. market, we’re actively seeking a reliable business partner—someone like you—to grow together.
      > 
      > Here’s how we can support you:
      > - Proactively apply and schedule interviews on job platforms on your behalf
      > - Optimize and refine your resume and LinkedIn profile to stand out
      > - Provide technical guidance to help you succeed in interviews
      > - Take care of the actual development work once new projects are secured
      > 
      > If this sounds interesting to you, feel free to reach out. We’d love to hear your thoughts and explore how we can collaborate!
      > 
      > Looking forward to connecting with you.
      > 
      > Best Regards
      > Cuong
      

      Some of these messages are even from people who are well-connected to former bosses and managers and other talented people that I personally know. They aren't coming out of my spam folder.

      I know I'm not special in this. I'm not the only one. They are throwing spaghetti on the wall until the meatballs stick, etc.

      But I thought... what if I could use this to my advantage? I would still need to do the interviews but they could do the legwork applying for jobs and reaching out to companies, connections that they already have, and then when they deliver the job contract I cut off contact with these nebulous associates? And I join the company like normal.

      Thoughts?

      15 votes
    4. New Android phones, stock or flash?

      I'm getting a new phone (OnePlus 13, not that it really matters) and I'm considering the benefits of flashing over something like LineageOs straight away rather than using the stock OS. Normally,...

      I'm getting a new phone (OnePlus 13, not that it really matters) and I'm considering the benefits of flashing over something like LineageOs straight away rather than using the stock OS.

      Normally, I expect? You'd run stock until security updates stop or something changes where you want a longer running OS, but I'm considering it because I cannot be bothered with all the bloatware they put on modern phones these days.
      Plus it should save a heap of battery.

      What are people's thoughts on this? Is it something you always do anyway or do you usually run stock for a while?

      33 votes
    5. Dragon Quest I - III original Switch or HD 2D?

      Original switch release or hd 2d? So I have the original switch releases of I, II, and III that are based on the mobile ports. I beat one already a year or two ago and had a decent time. My...

      Original switch release or hd 2d?

      So I have the original switch releases of I, II, and III that are based on the mobile ports. I beat one already a year or two ago and had a decent time. My question is should I play II and III as I have them or get the hd 2d remake.

      I know it seems like the hd 2d remake is the obvious choice but I have some caveats. I'm a stay at home caretaker of a family member. Currently unemployed (though I'm trying to get caretaking for them as a job) so I'd have to wait and only get one of the releases as a Christmas gift and the other as a birthday gift next summer should employment not come through by then.

      I know the remakes of I and III aren't out yet but based on your impressions and what III hd 2d is like.

      So I'm wondering if it's worth waiting and sacrificing other potential games when I have two playable versions now.

      Thoughts?

      5 votes
    6. Starting a tool library

      Hi everyone, I'm feeling inspired to start a tool library out of a community space. I am resisting the urge to roll the software myself and I'm wondering if anyone has suggestions about existing...

      Hi everyone, I'm feeling inspired to start a tool library out of a community space. I am resisting the urge to roll the software myself and I'm wondering if anyone has suggestions about existing projects that I might look into, ideally leaning towards the lightweight side of things.

      What say you, Tildes community?

      17 votes
    7. Advice on a voice recorder

      I'm starting an archive project of long form interviews with locals in my area. Do any of y'all have advice on what might be the best handheld voice recorder that's high quality sound but small...

      I'm starting an archive project of long form interviews with locals in my area. Do any of y'all have advice on what might be the best handheld voice recorder that's high quality sound but small and discrete so my interviewees can forget that they're being recorded?

      13 votes
    8. Looking for places to get bulk OTC medicine in the US

      I have a prescription for a certain digestion aide which I need to take on a daily basis. A while back, I got a letter from my insurance that they will no longer be covering it and offering it...

      I have a prescription for a certain digestion aide which I need to take on a daily basis. A while back, I got a letter from my insurance that they will no longer be covering it and offering it through the pharmacy counter because it's an over-the-counter medication.

      The problem is that almost nobody sells this drug in large quantities. I used to get a 3-month supply, 100 pills, for something less than $10. Now the best price I can seem to find is $12 for a 42-pack, and annoyingly they only ever come in incredibly irritating blister packs (a pox on the people who invented putting pills in those things!), or an equally unhinged option of being spread between three separate bottles and boxed together.

      I did happen to find a place that sold the drug in bulk, but I've never heard of them and their website doesn't exactly inspire trust.

      Does anyone know of a place where I might be able to find the drugs I need in quantities and packaging that makes sense, within the United States?

      23 votes
    9. Home-lab set-up ... Docker vs native servers? Pros and cons of each?

      And as long as I'm asking ... nginx or Apache (or Caddy or whatever else you think is best). I'm hosting a few web sites and services, but currently, everything is "out there" on VPSes. I want to...

      And as long as I'm asking ... nginx or Apache (or Caddy or whatever else you think is best).

      I'm hosting a few web sites and services, but currently, everything is "out there" on VPSes. I want to bring it all in-house, go back to the old days of actually hosting websites out of my living room.

      Towards that end, I am gradually upgrading and overhauling all the sites and services, fixing long-standing issues and inefficiencies in the config files, merging servers, etc.

      I have never learned Docker. I've started to several times, worked with it a bit on a job once, used it a bit here and there; so I'm not clueless, but it would be a learning curve.

      Also, I'm running one main service (Nextcloud) that officially, only supports Apache -- there absolutely are nginx setup guidelines and tutorials and such, but that's all unofficial, experimental setups.

      And I'm running another major service (Synapse), on nginx.

      And I want to merge the servers, and choose one web server to host both of them, and I don't know which way to go there.

      Thanks for any feedback.

      25 votes
    10. Potentially autistic and frustrated

      A few months ago I went to the psychiatrist and we talked for like an hour. We got onto the topic of autism and I mentioned how I was always curious if I had it. She spent like five or so minutes...

      A few months ago I went to the psychiatrist and we talked for like an hour. We got onto the topic of autism and I mentioned how I was always curious if I had it. She spent like five or so minutes asking me questions and said she would put me as autism coded in my chart.

      I wasn't sure if that meant it was an official diagnosis or not but I didn't think to ask until after the appointment. It seemed really quick for it to be an official diagnosis.

      I went back to her last week and brought up that she marked me as "autism coded." I asked "is that a diagnosis or does it just mean it's suspected?" She didn't really give a straightforward answer and just said that I have "really really high functioning autism."

      But I don't know if that means I'm officially diagnosed. And if I take her at her words of calling me autistic and then applying that label to myself I feel like a fake because I never had a huge assessment like most people.

      Thoughts? Advice? Am I overthinking this?

      21 votes
    11. Fridge at 41°F - safe or not?

      Heya! So I've got a new fridge, a GE GTS22KGNRWW 21.9ft³. Skipping over the fridge water line bursting and causing thousands of dollars of damage followed by the fridge crapping out, we're just...

      Heya! So I've got a new fridge, a GE GTS22KGNRWW 21.9ft³. Skipping over the fridge water line bursting and causing thousands of dollars of damage followed by the fridge crapping out, we're just trying to make sure the fridge is OK before the warranty expires and because we have a baby in the house.

      The ambient air was still above 41°F a few hours after we got it, so I cranked it to full blast and put a glass of water in to have a better testing point. The ambient air has been fluctuating between like 39-44° F and the water glass measured between like 39.0°-41.0° F after about 24 hours with occasional use. I know I'm worrying because the last fridge just crapped out and spoiled a ton of food, and I know opening the door always causes it to drop (which I'm obviously doing to test it), but it seems kind of high to me for a brand new fridge if 41 is really the upper limit. Is this an acceptable range, or should we ask for someone to come out and look at it?

      16 votes
    12. Sleep discipline

      I have trouble setting a time to sleep and following through on it, and it's made my life needlessly worse. I find it especially difficult when I've had a really productive or busy day. I've tried...

      I have trouble setting a time to sleep and following through on it, and it's made my life needlessly worse. I find it especially difficult when I've had a really productive or busy day. I've tried setting a schedule on my phone that turns off certain apps past a certain time, but I keep manually turning it off. Any tips?

      28 votes
    13. Working on a ~2008 dream gaming computer running Vista (in an old server)

      Any clever ways to connect to the Internet safely to update drivers, security, etc? I'd only want to connect to Intel, AMD, Microsoft, etc, and then would physically disconnect the lan card. I...

      Any clever ways to connect to the Internet safely to update drivers, security, etc? I'd only want to connect to Intel, AMD, Microsoft, etc, and then would physically disconnect the lan card. I know, dangerous, but I'm trying a piecemeal approach with a flash drive and getting mixed results. I tried to update to Service Pack 2, and it bricked the computer on restart, back to flashing Vista.

      15 votes
    14. Is a career change towards cybersecurity viable for someone with an accountancy background?

      Sorry if this isn't the best place to ask. IT and cybersecurity-focused communities over on Reddit aren't exactly the most welcoming places for such questions, and reading the r/ITCareerQuestions...

      Sorry if this isn't the best place to ask. IT and cybersecurity-focused communities over on Reddit aren't exactly the most welcoming places for such questions, and reading the r/ITCareerQuestions wiki has made me seriously question if I'm being sold false promises of working in a sector that actually has a low demand for workers. Then again, that wiki page seems more geared towards the US job market.

      Two weeks ago, I responded to an Instagram ad advertising cybersecurity courses, because the job market is horrible here in the UK right now, and after some setbacks with my ACCA studies, I am seriously considering just giving up on trying to get into chartered accountancy because that path is closing many more doors for me. A course advisor rang me asking about the reasons I showed interest in the ad, then we had a long discussion about any questions I had, what the sector is apparently like, etc.

      Some of the claims seem too good to be true, i.e. that it's an industry where you can afford to be picky, jobs outnumber people by almost 3 to 1, most jobs are remote, the provider boasts a 90%+ employment rate, I don't need programming experience, the most complex thing I'd be doing is running command prompt/powershell commands and scripts.

      The firm itself seems legitimate. They offer CompTIA, Microsoft, Cisco, AWS and EC-Council certifications, have good review scores on Trustpilot, are a registered training provider and limited company in the UK, and are supposedly an assured service provider with the National Cyber Security Centre (NCSC.) The courses they mentioned to me in their syllabus supposedly come to £4k and would take about six months.

      1. Am I right to be wary about what this training provider are offering?
      2. Do you require extensive programming knowledge or a computer science background to work in cybersecurity in any capacity? A friend with an IT background has told me that Python is useful in his field.
      3. Is the reality of IT and cybersecurity jobs in the UK (or in the West) far different from what has been painted to me?
      24 votes
    15. I teach a student with Reactive Attachment Disorder and I need help

      Special Ed. Teacher here. This year I've been assigned a tough caseload. But my most challenging student is easily the student with Reactive Attachment Disorder and possibly autism. I'll call him...

      Special Ed. Teacher here.

      This year I've been assigned a tough caseload. But my most challenging student is easily the student with Reactive Attachment Disorder and possibly autism. I'll call him Jake.

      Edit: He's in middle school, btw.

      To protect his privacy and my own, I can't give many specifics. This student is chronically online and I wouldn't put it past him to Google situations he's caused in my class.

      Some vague descriptions of the things he's done this year:

      -Repeatedly jokes about pedophilia and teachers who have been arrested for it. It makes me uncomfortable that he does this, obviously. The only saving grace here is that he has thrown it around so many times, including calling multiple teachers pedophiles last year, that everyone knows he is just being rude and it's not a serious accusation. Thoroughly documented and I'm not really concerned about actually being accused. Fyi, I have informed his adoptive parents and they have informed his counselor. They are taking it seriously and have started investigating whether or not this is just shocking humor or a more serious part of the Jake's history before adoption.

      -Waits for the perfect time to drop rude or shocking comments to inflict maximum damage. When he wants to say something awful to me or in general, he will hold off until he has an audience and the room is relatively quiet.

      -Constantly mocks and shit talks certain students. We have dealt with it. He isn't just getting away with it. But even after consequences, separation from the students, and punishments at home, he doesn't stop. He's hung up on hating a couple of kids in particular but will generally be rude to whoever if he wants to. One of these kids is a scrappy kid from a rough school and I could totally see it ending in punches if we don't manage this.

      -Absolutely refuses to share any serious thoughts. Even when asked what kind of support he needs, what kind of rewards would motivate him, or what's bothering him, he just gives ridiculous answers in a high-pitched voice or walks away. This kid wants no part in coming up with solutions and won't even engage in a conversation about his behavior or even the behavior of others.

      -Speaking of his high pitched voice, this is the voice he always uses to say rude things. He has his normal speaking voice and then he uses this higher pitched voice when he says things that are rude or shocking. Like he has two different brains and one wants to be mean.

      -Last year, he kept a list of times he felt students and teachers had broken the code of conduct.

      -absolutely hates special Ed. Hates me for being a special ed. teacher. Reminds the other kids in my class that they're "special" constantly.

      For the record, all of these things have been addressed many times. The school has been supportive, the parents have been supportive, and everyone knows that this behavior, if continued for much longer, will likely result in a change of programming for this student. He would be placed in a more restrictive setting.

      This is kind of my last ditch effort to see if anyone has ideas, because this student is on the verge of leaving my classroom. If there is anything I can do to make it work with this kid, I would do it immediately. He's smart, witty, and unfortunately very funny in a South Park kind of a way. But he's raising hell every day and he's the first student I've had where it feels like I can't connect with him at all. And not for lack of trying.

      42 votes
    16. Where should I shop for a tuxedo?

      My best friend is getting married soon and it’s a black tie event. I’m in a privileged position, I want to spend a little extra to dress well (some friendly fashion competition between the men,...

      My best friend is getting married soon and it’s a black tie event. I’m in a privileged position, I want to spend a little extra to dress well (some friendly fashion competition between the men, and my own vanity).

      What I know: I want a tuxedo that will fit & look nicer than a rental from Men’s Wearhouse. I really like a tailored suit I bought from Suit Supply, but I’d rather not buy a tuxedo I’ll likely only wear once.

      What I don’t know: Anything about businesses other than Men’s Wearhouse that do tuxedo rentals.

      Does anyone have suggestions for businesses they’ve personally rented tuxedos from?

      Some of the tuxedos at Suit Supply sell for around $750 USD. How much do non-Men’s Wearhouse tuxedo rentals cost?

      Does a tailored tuxedo look that much better than a rental to justify buying instead of renting?

      15 votes
    17. How can I organize and store my cables?

      I have two giant drawers right now that are complete rats’ nests. Cables of every kind and type, all mixed together. You can’t tell where one cable ends and another begins. It is at the point...

      I have two giant drawers right now that are complete rats’ nests. Cables of every kind and type, all mixed together. You can’t tell where one cable ends and another begins.

      It is at the point where I recently needed a cable that I know that I have, but it was easier and less stressful to just order a new one than try to find it in the mess.

      Ideally, I’d have cables that are neatly organized, not tangled together, easily identifiable, and space efficient, but I honestly have no idea how to make this happen.

      Anyone have any tips?

      20 votes
    18. Question about REST APIS and encryption

      So I am finally starting the process of designing a personal website that can help manage and organize my finances for me. So obviously, the security of such data is paramount and for the heck of...

      So I am finally starting the process of designing a personal website that can help manage and organize my finances for me.

      So obviously, the security of such data is paramount and for the heck of it, I want to design a webapp where it doesn't operate by the rules of "trust me bro" even though I will be the one designing it and most likely will be the only one ever to use it. Just want that experience of proper encryption setup.

      Also, even if I am the one operating it, I'd like to set it up so that even if the database is compromised, none of my information is.

      skip to bottom if you want to just see my 2 question

      Did some reading online, between reading when StandardNotes does encryption as well as how it does it and some basic reading into encryption

      and the importance of not having a local unencrypted database like Joplin does

      So all that got me curious how Google encrypts the user data it has and would up reading

      and the basic take-aways seem to be:

      • utilize encryption on a field before storing it in a database so that even if the machine gets compromised, the data won't be
      • if you want to go even further, take the approach of StandardNotes, where it seems even the web server itself never touched unencrypted data it seems? Looks like all the encrypting and decrypting happens locally and only encrypted data is sent to the server
      1. But that got me curious. It can't be argued that Google is not secure. they have the best minds working there to ensure just that. and yet its also well known that their respect for user privacy is non-existent. Which means that they've made sure to protect the data [email, google searches, google docs, google maps history] from hackers but they can themselves decrypt at least some user data for the purpose of data collection and selling ads.
        But if Google can decrypt the data and that implies they store the keys on a server from what I can tell from my reading, how it is protected if someone malicious gains access to the database? If that person got access to the database and the keys that Google uses to decrypt the data, wouldn't that compromise the data?

      2. if I decide to design my webapp so that all the encrypting and decrypting happens locally, that means that if I were to decide to create a REST API for my application, that would also have to be taking in data in encrypted format, no? Cause if that takes it in plaintext, that means that my webserver would have to be responsible for encryption, which it needs the keys to do that with and if it can encrypt with keys it has access to, then it can decrypt too, no? or are websites that deal with encrypted databases and have REST APIs that can take in plain text information generally coded to be using asymmetric encryption? meaning its different keys being used for encryption and decryption? Or is API Token the key in an encrypted format? or have I misunderstood the whole thing?

      16 votes
    19. Advice on 6 year old's trantrums?

      tl;dr - Is it normal for 6 year olds to randomly start throwing massive tantrums. My son up to this point has been very mild mannered and not prone to getting upset. But the last few weeks have...

      tl;dr - Is it normal for 6 year olds to randomly start throwing massive tantrums. My son up to this point has been very mild mannered and not prone to getting upset. But the last few weeks have been insane.

      My son (6) has been going through something that is just really challenging the heck out of me. It started a few weeks ago when we were getting ready to leave for trip to visit family a few states away. He complained that his stomach hurt and began sobbing and begging to take a bath. So we accommodated and let him take 3 baths in a single day because we figured he just wasn't feeling well. We scheduled a doctor's appointment and the doctor just suggested a bland diet for a day and see how it plays out. After that he didn't really seem to have any issues, so we went ahead with our trip.

      The hours-long drive didn't seem to faze him at all and we arrived safe and sound, despite a heavy rainstorm on the way. Over the course of the trip, every time we tried to drive somewhere to meet up with family, he'd claim he was sick and if we pushed on it, he'd throw a tantrum. Which is very unlike him, to be clear. And anytime we weren't talking about a car ride, he was acting pretty normal. We thought maybe it was anxiety from the drive there? The rainstorm was very intense at times, and I can see how that could be incredibly scary for a kid.

      We spent the rest of the trip hyping him up for the drive home. My wife and I both have anxiety disorders, so we tried to help him understand that we knew how he felt and offered some advice (in a 6yo friendly way, to the best of our abilities). We also maintained a relatively bland diet for him in case he actually was feeling sick. But anyway we were absolutely dreading the ride home.

      Just getting him and his sister in the car proved to be the absolute worst day of my parenting life. He threw the tantrum of tantrums, which set his sister off and she kept trying to escape from the car. Meanwhile it was 90F+ outside and our car's AC doesn't really kick in until you start driving. I was hot, upset, angry, scared, frustrated and just not operating at peak parental power. There was a lot of yelling, a lot of trying to hold them into their seats so I could buckle them, and all of it obviously just made the situation worse. I really fucked it up and I'm still trying to work through it all.

      Long story short, we ended up separating him and his sister, with him driving home with us and his sister driving home with my parents. Once his sister was out of the car, he calmed down and we were able to leave. The plan was to just drive off and get some gas, let them both calm down, then pick her back up.

      I had to go on a work trip shortly after that trip, so I was away for most last week. In that time my wife didn't try to take the kids anywhere, for fear of having a repeat incident, but solo and outnumbered by the kids. When I got back I started trying to hype my son up for the car ride to his and his sister's 6th birthday party the next day. He tried to negotiate saying maybe we could just walk instead of drive. I explained, "no it's a short car ride, but we couldn't walk there".

      When the time came to take him to the party, he threw a tantrum, but I redirected using my car's remote start fob (he really liked that) and I talked him down a bit. The ride to the party was fine, as was the return trip. Then yesterday we did a trip to Gamestop so he could pick out a birthday present for himself and again the trip both ways was fine (with zero tantrum!). Although he has yet to get in the car with his sister since we got back from our trip a few weeks back and he has specifically called out not wanting to be in the car with her.

      BUT the last two nights he's started throwing the exact same type of tantrums at bedtime, claiming he can only sleep in our bed and he's sick and his legs hurt and all these other things. When told no, he screams bloody murder, starts kicking and hitting, and it's really difficult for me to handle that. The tantrums of course set his sister off and then we have two 6yo twins feeding off each other's sadness and anger like two colliding hurricanes.

      Is this just normal 6 year old stuff? I know they're still learning to regulate emotions and so maybe that's it? His sister went through something like this a few months ago, but it was exclusively about bedtime. She'd throw massive tantrums at bedtime while he'd just quietly go to bed. So that kind of reinforces that this is just a growth spurt of some sort? But I'm getting concerned it's something else, but I don't know what?

      29 votes
    20. I need helping figure out why the Hard Disk Drive BBS priorities keeps changing

      I have this Motherboard with 3 hard drives. I want the order to be P2 Windows P5 and I have set that order many times, but for reasons I can't figure out, every once in a while, the order changes...

      I have this Motherboard with 3 hard drives. I want the order to be

      • P2
      • Windows
      • P5

      and I have set that order many times, but for reasons I can't figure out, every once in a while, the order changes like you can see in this screenshot or other times, P5 somehow becomes the first option.

      I can't figure out how to fix this?

      11 votes
    21. How can I find some Brazilian mailing lists I was a part of in mid-1990s?

      This is probably a very long shot. I was part of quite a few maling lists / email groups back in the 1990s in Brazil. Lists for things like writing, The X-Files, Star Trek, or skepticism. I made a...

      This is probably a very long shot. I was part of quite a few maling lists / email groups back in the 1990s in Brazil. Lists for things like writing, The X-Files, Star Trek, or skepticism. I made a few friends. I know some of them were probably hosted on large foreign companies like Yahoo. I don't remember the actual names of the lists, and the internet provider where I had my email no longer exists. So I don't expect to find them easily, but I imagine that there must be some kind of archive where they may or may not exist. I'm okay with sifting through for a very long time if I have to. That may be facilitated by the fact that the Brazilian internet was fairly small back then. And I do remember possible usernames I might have used at the time, which I can use in a search.

      Is what I want possible at all? Is there some kind of centralized archive that is easy for me to use?

      Thanks!

      16 votes
    22. Any experience with GLG consulting?

      I had heard about GLG a while ago and I was just approached by someone from GLG for a project. Does anyone have experience working with them specifically? I have never done any paid consulting...

      I had heard about GLG a while ago and I was just approached by someone from GLG for a project. Does anyone have experience working with them specifically? I have never done any paid consulting gigs and I want to make sure I understand what I'm getting into.

      Thanks!

      10 votes
    23. I need advice, which laptop would you buy now?

      I would like to upgrade my aged 8 years old laptop and I'm completely undecided about which laptop to buy right now. I considered Apple Intel laptops terrible, bad thermals, overpriced,...

      I would like to upgrade my aged 8 years old laptop and I'm completely undecided about which laptop to buy right now.

      I considered Apple Intel laptops terrible, bad thermals, overpriced, unreliable, touch bar (uggg), I hated every second working on it, when the company I work for upgraded me with a M1, it was such a huge improvement from any laptop I have ever tried, absolutely no noise, incredibly performant and the longest battery life of any laptop by a lot.

      I still don't like the Apple ecosystem, and I would prefer to use Linux as my main OS, but I can't find anything that comes even closer for the price of a Mac Air, If I go with Framework I'll get a less performant machine with a way worse battery, I honestly don't think the premium on repairability is worth for me when I don't have any issues repairing more challenging laptops, at the end repairability will be how easy is to get new parts.

      ThinkPads have good reputation and repairability, but for what I see, the quality has gone down the drain in their latest models, and if I go with their premium models I get similar performance to Apple with worse battery, Dell has similar issues.

      Gaming laptops are not an option, I don't do any PC gaming and the size and aesthetics are a dealbreaker for me.

      The main issue seems to be that until ARM processors become better competitors to Apple, the battery life will be always the bottleneck, and I don't know how good the new Snapdragon X Elite compares right now.

      Besides web development, photography edition and video editing (4k), I don't do many demanding tasks, I'm more than fine with the performance of a M1 as the baseline.

      As an alternative, I'm thinking about getting a powerful desktop for the demanding tasks and a less powerful laptop with a good battery and screen, but ideally I would prefer a single machine.

      43 votes
    24. [SOLVED] Requesting help for Android Auto troubleshooting assistance

      I have a Moto G 5G 2023 and 2025 Chevy Trax that I'm trying to troubleshoot why Android Auto cannot last more than 10 minutes without crashing out and needing to either wait for the connection to...

      I have a Moto G 5G 2023 and 2025 Chevy Trax that I'm trying to troubleshoot why Android Auto cannot last more than 10 minutes without crashing out and needing to either wait for the connection to be available again, or unplug and replug the USB cord to get it to reconnect. Sometimes it goes for an extended period of time, and sometimes it won't last for longer than a minute before it crashes with no visible error on the phone. I think it might be something in RAM, but more often than not it's when Google Maps is up, with Audible in the background and I'm not sure if it's one of those or possibly my Launcher or having the three buttons turned on for my phone, or some weird esoteric thing.

      12 votes
    25. How do you resolve feelings of obligation?

      Hello tilderers, I have a dilemma I'm having that I'd like perspective on. I often find myself doing things not because I want to, but because I have to. I feel obligated to. It is better if I do...

      Hello tilderers, I have a dilemma I'm having that I'd like perspective on.

      I often find myself doing things not because I want to, but because I have to. I feel obligated to. It is better if I do X than if I don't do X, so I should do X, even if I don't want to.

      Though overall I don't consider "feeling obligated" a positive nor sustainable emotion to have.

      These are often tied to social etiquette and maintaining a status quo at the sacrifice? of your own comfort.

      Examples:

      You're an introverted so tend to not desire social activity as much, but understand socializing is good for maintaining relationships so you accept invites regardless of whether you have true desire to be out for the person/occasion/event.

      You should get a gift for Y because it's their birthday/Christmas because it's an expected, nice gesture but you don't really have a gift in mind or tendency of gift giving.

      Z does something nice for you, pays for your dinner/got a gift/done a favor, but was not something you wanted Z to do or asked them to do. Yet now you feel indebted to give back.

      General occasions where social and emotional reciprocation is expected and you're not entuned to reciprocate necessarily. And the general consequence of not reciprocating is weakening relationships/negativity from others etc.

      Where is the line between doing whatever you feel/comfortable with (selfishness/self centered?) and doing things because you are socially obligated to (caring about what other people think/feel about you).

      What is the resolution to negative feelings of obligation?

      How can obligation turn to desire?

      How does one perspective shift in this way?
      You do this not because you have to, because you want to do this.

      24 votes
    26. A nine-week (ongoing) job application has turned into a shitshow. Not sure how I should handle it...

      As some of you on here may know, I was made redundant from my Assistant Commercial Reporting Analyst job three months ago and have been struggling to find permanent work since. Many of my...

      As some of you on here may know, I was made redundant from my Assistant Commercial Reporting Analyst job three months ago and have been struggling to find permanent work since. Many of my interactions with recruiters and hiring managers have been negative and have felt like they were wasting my time, but one particular (ongoing) experience has taken the cake.

      In mid-April, I applied for an Assistant Client Accountant position through LinkedIn. The role was with a large property management and building consultancy firm (offices based in the UK & France), who have some pretty big-name clients. Fully office-based, advertised pay between £25k - £29k (already similar payscales to what credit control and purchase ledger roles near me are offering), and the position ideally asked for fully AAT qualified or ACCA part-qualified candidates (I have full AAT membership, am 3 exams into my ACCA, and have over 6 years experience in previous accounting and financial reporting roles.)

      Nine weeks later, I am still going through this application process which has been nothing short of a shitshow:

      • It has taken multiple weeks to schedule and conduct interviews for each stage, due to unanswered emails and heavily delayed responses from both the Finance and HR teams. I had emailed on nine separate occasions to schedule the the second and third stage interviews I was invited to, and only twice did I get replies. At first I was told it was due to staff sickness, but then the trend of replying in business weeks just kept going on, even after the third-stage (which I'll get to.)

      • The first stage interview was a 15 - 30 minute phone interview going through my CV and salary expectations. Stages 2 and 3 involved a series of hour-long competency based interviews, one conducted via Teams and the other in-person with the Head of Finance. This is already a ridiculous number of hoops to jump through for an office-based role with this salary level.

      • During the third-stage interview (3rd June) I was asked a lot of supervisory/leadership questions which I honestly didn't expect. It made me question whether I was being interviewed for the correct role, so I checked the job description of what I applied for. Only 4 of the 590 words contained within the job advert even alluded to me leading junior colleagues - so maybe it was easily missed?

      • On the 5th June (two days after my third-stage interview), I received an email from HR thanking me for accepting the Client Accountant position and asking me to confirm RTW (right-to-work) details. The thing is... I never received an offer letter, and after immediately chasing this up I found out the email was sent to me by mistake. This HR rep apologized and said they'd chase feedback. I emailed twice to chase this feedback and promised it would be coming.

      • Today when I emailed again to chase feedback, the HR advisor responded to raise concerns about the salary expectations I communicated in the first stage, insisted the role actually paid £26k at most and asked me to confirm a salary within their range. This is false (I know, I actually double-checked the job ad and even did a screen recording on my mobile of me going into the LinkedIn app and opening the job posting) and I get the impression that they're now trying to lowball me. I emailed again asking for clarification where I linked the job ads and I get the feeling they confused the salary bands with a Purchase Ledger role I applied for several months prior but was not considered for.

      I will find out Monday (after nearly three weeks) if I was successful in my application, but even if they offer me the job at a reduced salary rather than outright reject me, I am already seeing a shitload of red flags.

      At this point I've had enough. Normally I'd cut my ties and move on but with how desperate I've been for work and how much I feel like this company has taken me for a ride, I feel the need to take things further. Not sure whether I should (or even could) formally raise a complaint, drop some negative feedback on their Glassdoor page, or go public (with receipts) and openly name & shame the company on LinkedIn, Facebook or Instagram. The latter options feel like I'd be going nucelar and as cathartic as it would be, I'm worried it would be seen as unprofessional and hurt my future job prospects.

      What would be the best way to proceed?

      30 votes
    27. Any Ubiquiti Unifi users? - Questions on zone firewall policies

      I'd normally post this on reddit...but I thought I'd give the Tildes Tech Support Team a try. I have a Ubiquiti Unifi Cloud Gateway Ultra and I'm trying to better understand zone firewall...

      I'd normally post this on reddit...but I thought I'd give the Tildes Tech Support Team a try.

      I have a Ubiquiti Unifi Cloud Gateway Ultra and I'm trying to better understand zone firewall management and VLANs and all that.

      I'll start with a screenshot. I'm only changing the two settings highlighted in red.

      I'm trying to understand the difference between two firewall policy settings:

      1. Action = Allow ONLY, AND Connection State = Return Traffic
      2. Action = Allow AND Auto Allow Return Traffic checked, AND Connection State = All

      I have two VLANs -- "Internal" and "Lab." Each is in their own policy zone, also called "Internal" and "Lab." The "Internal" VLAN does not have the "Isolate Network" option checked, but "Lab" does.

      What I want is devices in "Internal" able to initiate and maintain connections with devices in "Lab." But I don't want devices in "Lab" able to initiate connections to devices in "Internal."

      With Policy 1, "Internal" can't reach "Lab" nor vice versa. Hmm.

      With Policy 2, "Internal" can ping and SSH into devices in "Lab," but not the other way around. Perfect; that's what I want.

      And now my question(s): What is the difference between these two policies? To me, they look the same. But clearly the end results say they're not. So what's actually going on here? Additionally, assuming I could get Policy 1 to do what I want, is Policy 2 more vulnerable from a cybersecurity perspective than Policy 1?

      If it helps, here's a screenshot of my zone matrix, with focus on source "Internal" and destination "Lab."

      Thanks!

      17 votes
    28. Summer roadtrip in Scandinavia - need advice!

      Hi all, we're planning an RV roadtrip to Scandinavia in July. We'll be taking off from France and so far we're clear on the route until we get to Denmark; the issue is picking between Sweden and...

      Hi all, we're planning an RV roadtrip to Scandinavia in July. We'll be taking off from France and so far we're clear on the route until we get to Denmark; the issue is picking between Sweden and Norway for the main leg of the trip. We take off July 5th from Paris and need to be back the 26th. Ideally we would have done a bit of both countries in that time, but I don't think that's realistic (I'm the only driver) and we don't want to rush.

      I've trawled the internet for information and advice (Reddit, Youtube roadtrip sites etc), but it's only made it harder to choose. There are so many cool places to visit, and things to see and do! We're leaning towards Norway, but I'm looking for others' thoughts before making our final choice. Here's what we've considered so far:

      • We want to focus on being in nature and enjoying the outdoors. Other than spending a day or two in Copenhagen, we're not really looking to stay in the big cities.
      • We (well, my wife and kids) are pretty active. We'll probably be looking to go hiking, cycling, swimming, climbing, kayaking/paddling, etc. Between the two, Norway seems to have the most opportunities to do this?
      • The RV is fairly large, more than 7m in length, so I'd rather not find myself driving on very small, tight and winding roads. I understand Sweden's roads are more forgiving in this regard?
      • We want to avoid places that are overly crowded in the summmer. While places like Trolltunga and Lofoten are beautiful, I expect there will be a lot of tourists there at that time. We dont want to contribute to clogging roads and overcrowding.
      • I have downloaded a bunch of apps and maps that give us info on places to park and sleep overnight. I'm not opposed to wild camping, but my main priority will be my family's safety. Staying at paid campsites is not an issue, but we also want some degree of freedom to move around.
      • It seems our best option would be to stay in the southern areas of either/both, but I confess I'm tempted to visit a glacier if we can (though it's not a deal-breaker).
      • I'm a birdwatcher (I know, summer is not the best period for this), so if anyone knows interesting spots for that I'm all ears!

      I know that's a lot of information, but we'd be grateful for any thoughts that could help us make a decision and plan out our itinerary. Any tips you may have are very welcome!

      12 votes
    29. Not sure if there is a name for this setup?

      So, I want to achieve something particular regarding my home network. I want to have 2 routers, one is my main router that everything connects to except for my devices where I stream things from,...

      So, I want to achieve something particular regarding my home network.
      I want to have 2 routers, one is my main router that everything connects to except for my devices where I stream things from, and when it comes to streaming devices, I want those to use a different router that plugs into the main router

      Why? I have been selected for the focalmeter panel and that device is connected to a router to

      1. intercept all packets going to the router it is setup with
      2. replaces the hostnames of all the devices with a random selection of letters (think HH123-4) and I don't want that to happen with my servers. (aka it takes over the DHCP service on the router)

      part 1 kinda bothers me but 2 is such a nuisance for when I am doing SSH, So my solution is to get a secondary router for the "streaming" part of my network, hook that router up to my main router and then let the focalmeter take over the DHCP service of that secondary router and so everything it does impacts only the streaming part of my network. Like the focalmeter could literally fuck up the secondary router and my servers and machines I use for non-streaming reasons would not be affected in any way.

      My streaming devices need to be able to access my servers to be able to access my jellyfin but that's the only necessary connection I can think of atm. Although it would be nice if I can have the devices on my main network access my streaming devices over the network too.

      All that to say, when looking up how to get 2 routers work side-by-side like that with both their DHCP services up and running but not conflicting, I dont really know what to look for. Am I trying to setup a subnet or is there some other word for the network architecture I am trying to achieve?

      6 votes
    30. Help cleaning stains off laminate

      Hi all, hoping you might be able to help me. This seemed like the closest Tildes category to post in. Maybe a year ago, I noticed I had tracked something into my apartment on my shoes and it left...

      Hi all, hoping you might be able to help me. This seemed like the closest Tildes category to post in. Maybe a year ago, I noticed I had tracked something into my apartment on my shoes and it left gunk on the floor. I cleaned as best I could and most of it came off but one major spot stained. Everything I tried wouldn't take it off. Over the last year it darkened and is the darkest spot in the photo.

      I was never able to clean it off or figure out exactly what I got stuck on my shoe to cause it. Until a couple days ago when it happened again. And eventually I put two and two together. There's some type of tree that drops some kind of nut or seed near the parking area and when I walk to my trunk after parking I accidentally stepped in one which smushed into my shoe and tracked into the apartment. I don't know what kind of tree or seed it is, but that's what stained it.

      Now that it's happened again it's even worse and I cannot for the life of me clean this off. I have tried 409, rubbing alcohol, Goo Gone, bleach, hydrogen peroxide and nothing cleans this crap off more than it is in the photo. Even scrubbed it with a sponge scrub pad and nothing. It's a smooth surface so it's not like a chunk I can scrape off, it's just like stained the laminate floor.

      Any suggestions on what else I can use to clean this gunk once and for all without damaging my apartments floor?

      Thanks! Here's the photo: https://imgur.com/a/pQ5hw36

      12 votes
    31. What is the best way to generate an ebook? Is EPUB the best ebook format?

      I usually generate ebooks in two ways. One is to export directly from Emacs Org-Mode with ox-epub. That doesn't give me a lot of control and export options are a bit of a crapshoot. Sometimes they...

      I usually generate ebooks in two ways. One is to export directly from Emacs Org-Mode with ox-epub. That doesn't give me a lot of control and export options are a bit of a crapshoot. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. The other is to export from Org-Mode to either odt or docx and use Libreoffice Writer to export to EPUB. I will then open the ebook on Calibre to fix the metadata, the table of contents., and generate a cover.

      That works fine for my personal use, but in the near future I may need to generate an ebook that looks proper and professional. I don't even know what "proper and professional" really means for an ebook, but I assume there must be tools and practices that are universally recomended that I am not following.

      Hence the question: are there "pro" tools for authoring ebooks? Are there any rules, standards, workflows, or guidelines I should be following? If those exist, where can I find tutorials and documentation on how to generate the best books?

      EDIT: I use Windows and Linux.

      Thanks!

      20 votes
    32. Value of a Computer Information Systems degree

      I've been considering going back to school and taking some courses that are available to me. With the associates that I already have, I was weighing the options that I have available to me....

      I've been considering going back to school and taking some courses that are available to me. With the associates that I already have, I was weighing the options that I have available to me. Computer Science is a classic and could probably get me very far with the "need a piece of paper" folks, but it's more software development than I have a passion for, compared to my troubleshooting, find a problem, solve a problem desires. Cybersecurity is probably going to be more dependent on certs than anything I can learn in a class, especially if it's ever evolving and a degree can be outmoded very quickly. Computer Information Systems sort of has my attention because it seems like an IT based degree with elements of a business setup and not as laser focused on coding. With the courses that I currently have under my belt, it would be more for CIS than it would be for CS, but more CLEP and ACE options so it about evens out.

      Does Computer Information Systems hold any water in any of your opinions to what Computer Science has to offer? Or is it somewhat arbitrary anyway?

      10 votes
    33. How do you comfort people?

      Hello everyone! I had a realization recently spurred by ongoing work stress that my partner is going through. I don't think I'm really good at providing comfort to people. For one, I always feel...

      Hello everyone! I had a realization recently spurred by ongoing work stress that my partner is going through. I don't think I'm really good at providing comfort to people.

      For one, I always feel very awkward when people other than close friends or romantic partners open up to me. I never quite know what to say. Something like "there there. I'm sorry you're going through that" feels really trite and rehearsed. However the other mode that I have is problem solving, which most people don't appreciate when they're going through something hard.

      Secondly, I have this internal feeling about constantly providing comfort for the same thing over and over forming a sort of codependency. I went through this with a previous long term relationship. She hated her job, she would come home, cry, I'd do my "there there" thing, she'd cheer up just enough to force herself through another day, and the cycle would repeat ad nauseum. At a certain point it began to feel like I was enabling a sort of self-harm, and I was bearing much of the fallout from that self-harm. Her job would make her miserable, she'd make me miserable, eventually I'd bear enough of that misery for her to make herself miserable again. Would it have been better to just put my foot down, say I'm no longer going to comfort you for this job that is stealing all of your joy, and I will help you fix this problem, but I won't continue to soothe the pain it causes you? Maybe, but I don't know if I could bring myself to do that. Also, what happens if it's a problem without a solution? What if it's a problem that most people deal with, and you just need to sort of build emotional resilience to deal with?

      I don't know the answers to these questions, and I'm not sure if anyone really does for sure, but I'm curious how other people feel about comforting people. What strategies have worked for you? Does it feel awkward? Is it something you've consciously worked on? Do you believe there's such a thing as too much comfort? Even for the people you love?

      34 votes
    34. Help me understand vim motions

      I use vim on remote servers or on my machine to edit single files. I, however, use it in a very basic sense, I do not use any vim motions. I enter edit mode, I change what I need to change, exit...

      I use vim on remote servers or on my machine to edit single files. I, however, use it in a very basic sense, I do not use any vim motions. I enter edit mode, I change what I need to change, exit edit mode and save and quit, that's it.

      Recently, I've been looking for alternatives to Visual Studio Code as Microsoft is starting to push Copilot very heavily and while I could use a cleaned up fork, the other concern is with more and more essential extensions becoming closed source and subject to Microsoft's licensing. And vim is a text editor that pops up over and over when I ask for recommendations.

      A few days ago I've listened to No Boilerplate's Writing at the Speed of Thought which brings up a point about vim and vim motions being designed around the human body and how "editing by letters is extremely unnatural ... [and] extremely ill-suited to our nature".
      That just doesn't sit well with me and may be the reason why vim never fully clicked with me. For context, I've been using computers in some capacity since a very early age, so perhaps the 'unnatural' way I've learned is so ingrained that I just can't make the switch, maybe I just think about things in a way that is more computer-centric just due to that as well.

      I am still on my quest to replace VSCode and I would love to make a switch to something that's less attached to a single corporation that can pull the rug from under me at any time. A part of that quest I guess turned out to be trying to understand vim and maybe finally making it click for me, so I turn to the wonderful community of Tildes for help :)

      Thank you

      22 votes
    35. Is there a sane way to use Git as a glorified sync tool?

      I am not a programmer nor am I in IT, but I like to use some of the same tools they use. I use Emacs for writing fiction and I like it a lot. One of the packages I use with Emacs is...

      I am not a programmer nor am I in IT, but I like to use some of the same tools they use. I use Emacs for writing fiction and I like it a lot. One of the packages I use with Emacs is git-timemachine, which allows me to visualize all the previously commited versions of the file I am currently working on. It serves as a very good and very reliable undo system. All my writing is on a private repo on Github. My usage is so simple and basic, Git/Github only serves as a kind of backup and undo (I know Git is not a backup, so I regularly download my repos as zips and send to OneDrive as an extra. They are also always available offline in the machines work, of course).

      The problem is, sometimes I work on different machines, and sometimes on different operating systems on the same machine (via dual boot). So I would like to know if there's an easy way to always "sync" the local mirror I am currently working on with the latest changes (also making sure that all changes are pushed). Essentially, I am asking if I can make Git work like Dropbox or OneDrive by automatically accept changes as long as they are the most recent version of a file. I do not wish to go through diffs approving every single change.

      I understand I could use something like rclone for that, but their bisync feature is still very new and not considered reliable. Also, I already use Git and it is good for me. So I would prefer not adding an extra piece to the puzzle.

      I am familiar with cron, have an elementary understanding of shell scripts, and can follow instructions.

      So, can Git do the job?

      28 votes
    36. How do you deal with large projects?

      It just so happens that I was asked to write a paper about goals I hadn't achieved and I just thought about how I haven't touched my video game engine project in any meaningful way for around two...

      It just so happens that I was asked to write a paper about goals I hadn't achieved and I just thought about how I haven't touched my video game engine project in any meaningful way for around two months or so. On reflection, the main thing that is preventing me from working on it is that when I try to get back into it, I don't really know what I'm doing. I'm unorganized and can't figure out what exactly to do next because it's so open-ended. I'm absolutely terrible about writing down plans for what I should do.

      I know that I'm not the only person who is trying to work on big solo projects, so I thought I'd ask: what are you doing to keep your project organized? Are you using any tools to help you? What do you find is most helpful to help you anticipate steps you'll need to address when things aren't very clear?

      20 votes
    37. Choosing a sewing machine

      I've been slowly getting into sewing, mainly with the goal of making cosplay, but for now mostly repairing and altering clothing by hand sewing. Since I've stuck with it for some time now I am...

      I've been slowly getting into sewing, mainly with the goal of making cosplay, but for now mostly repairing and altering clothing by hand sewing. Since I've stuck with it for some time now I am thinking of getting a sewing machine, since hand sewing larger things is a bit of a pain.

      So now I am looking at some sewing machines and I have a few questions: Is buying a cheaper machine a waste of money? I've read some older topics here on Tildes and saw that Singer machines have a terrible reputation, so I probably should avoid those? What kind of features should a machine definitely have? For example I am looking at something like the Janome Juno J15, is this still basically a toy or would it be enough for most things?

      16 votes
    38. EV owners - what advice do you have from experience for a new user?

      This coming week, I'm taking delivery of a 2023 Chevrolet Bolt 2LT with 24k miles. [It's red, and I'm going to call it my "Cherriot". Awful puns make everything better, and I live in the Cherry...

      This coming week, I'm taking delivery of a 2023 Chevrolet Bolt 2LT with 24k miles. [It's red, and I'm going to call it my "Cherriot". Awful puns make everything better, and I live in the Cherry Capitol, so.] Thanks to RTO, it's just not feasible to remain a one-car household any longer.

      The Bolt EV was about $15,000 cheaper than a new hybrid. Even though the low-end Ford Maverick price new was only a couple of thousand more than I'm paying for used, I've grown to hate driving SUV-sized and configured vehicles. I'm attached to the vanishing compact hatchback variety of car - comfortable to drive and park, easy to load and unload. They've always had as much cargo and passenger space as I've ever needed, and the Bolt comes highly recommended.

      I'm aware this car comes with some disadvantages compared to ICE or hybrid vehicles. The Bolt doesn't have the fastest charging speeds, but overnight Level 2 is fine. Range is supposed to be ~250 miles under ideal conditions. Typical use will average 10 miles/day. The longest road trips I'm likely to use it for should be well within range on a single charge, to destinations with plenty of charging stations.

      I don't have a 220v outlet in the garage yet. Public Level 3 CCS chargers should meet any expected needs in the interim even if that takes 2 hours of charging every couple of weeks. It's understood that the range will drop up to 40% in cold weather. I'm hoping to have the garage outlet installed by the time that's a problem.

      Otherwise, I've got all kinds of questions about the fine points of the EV driving experience.

      1. Regenerative braking. I'd think this is safer on wet or icy roads than using the mechanical brakes. I drove a manual transmission for many years - is the effect of regenerative braking similar to using the clutch to slow down? Should I use the "one pedal driving" setting all the time?

      2. Tire wear - how often should I expect to replace tires, and is regenerative braking a plus or minus for tire life? It's a front-wheel drive with all-wheel traction control. By all accounts, I will still need to swap to winter tires for safety in snow and ice. The odds are that I won't need new tires for a while. I try to save up in advance, and it would be helpful to have an idea of when I can expect that expense to arrive.

      3. How much do I need to worry about extreme high or low temperatures? Do I need to park in the shade all the time when it's above 30°C, or use a heater in the garage on very cold (< 0°C) days?

      4. Aside from the manufacturer's recommended maintenance schedule, is there anything I should be doing to prolong the life of the car?

      Please feel free to give any other advice, positive or negative experiences, etc.

      42 votes
    39. Tips for starting a garden?

      I'm currently living in a place where we have a bit of backyard space, complete with a porch and a raised planter bed down in the yard. We wanted to take advantage of this and try to grow some...

      I'm currently living in a place where we have a bit of backyard space, complete with a porch and a raised planter bed down in the yard.

      We wanted to take advantage of this and try to grow some plants this summer, even though it might already be getting late to plant. According to this USDA site, we live in a 10a plant hardiness zone.

      Currently, the plan is to plant some tomatoes and possibly hot peppers in the raised planter bed, and to grow some basil and oregano in pots on the porch. I don't have much of a plan other than to buy the plants, buy some soil, and plant, so I wanted to check here to see if anyone had good resources for getting started with gardening for the first time. In general I'm just wondering if anyone has advice for a new gardener to get off on the right foot — I'm novice enough to not even know the questions to ask!

      EDIT:

      I was busy the last few days so just came back and wow! Such good advice from everyone, I'm very excited to get planting. Even if I haven't replied to you I've read your post and appreciate the information!

      22 votes
    40. Question about sharing a photo on Tildes

      What's the best way to link a photo from my gallery to share here? My go to with friends and family is a Google drive link. Is there something I'm unaware of that means I shouldn't create links...

      What's the best way to link a photo from my gallery to share here? My go to with friends and family is a Google drive link. Is there something I'm unaware of that means I shouldn't create links through my Google drive for general public sharing?

      16 votes
    41. Not sure where to start or how to approach massage tools in relationship

      after being with my gf for a while, its become very clear to me that she really appreciate a massage. part of it is just its her love language and part of it is just that her back tends to have...

      after being with my gf for a while, its become very clear to me that she really appreciate a massage. part of it is just its her love language and part of it is just that her back tends to have issues.

      I'm at a place where I wouldn't necessarily be opposed to taking some massage classes to provide her a better experience but I don't really have the time for classes and I am in massive saving mode right now and classes don't seem cheap.

      So the next best thing seems to be get some adequate massage tools that couples can use without much expertise but quite frankly, I don't really know what qualifies as a "good massage tool". I was wondering if anyone here has gone down that hole and would be willing to share their experience?

      to give you more context on where the tool[s] would be used, she tends to like a massage on the left or right side of her back, not really much in the shoulder area and maybe a little above the bum but not much tbh.

      oh and she likes it when I use my knuckles or elbows.

      23 votes
    42. Recommendations for a conference talk

      My friend and I are going to co-present at an industry conference soon. We are comfortable with the subject matter and have finished the first draft of our slides with a very light script. I'm...

      My friend and I are going to co-present at an industry conference soon. We are comfortable with the subject matter and have finished the first draft of our slides with a very light script. I'm curious if anyone on Tildes has experience with speaking at conferences either solo or co-presenting and what tips you can share from your own experience.

      We've already established a few things:

      • In the agenda/overview slide at the beginning we'll politely ask people to save all questions for the end for when we've budgeted time. This is because I've seen from the audience other presentations be derailed and run out of time due to a single member of the audience regularly interrupting with questions.
      • Keep the text on slides to a bare minimum so that the audience's attention doesn't shift away from us and onto the screen. We're working on this and plan to use images/diagrams wherever appropriate although budgeting time to create these is difficult.
      • We're also planning to ensure the speaker notes cover what we're saying so if someone reviews the slides later instead of a recording they'll be able to follow along.
      10 votes
    43. Slowly starting a passion project of a finance web-app that I can use help me budget but I have a crucial question

      I am planning to use Plaid API and have a spring boot backend but given that I will be storing my financial information (such as whatever the Plaid API needs me to store to use their endpoints as...

      I am planning to use Plaid API and have a spring boot backend but given that I will be storing my financial information (such as whatever the Plaid API needs me to store to use their endpoints as well as just the transactions on my credit and chequing account), the security of the data is obviously crucial. and I think my problem is I don't know what I don't know.

      I have a basic idea of what kind of things I need to protect against.

      1. WIll have to use Spring security (or whatever is best) for thing like protecting against xss and csrf
      2. I need to ensure that the PostgreSQL database is encrypted

      but beyond that, I don't know much about the nuances of each type of security and customizations I should be on the look-out for. wonder if there's a trustworthy resource for at least detailing for me the kind of security I need to implement on either the Spring or PostgreSQL side of things?

      11 votes
    44. Rental company charged me for clogged toilet repair -> replacement

      So a my building charged me for a clogged toilet repair that turned into a total replacement. Its listed as a plumbing damage charge, I don't believe they have a basis to charge for that. What...

      So a my building charged me for a clogged toilet repair that turned into a total replacement.

      Its listed as a plumbing damage charge, I don't believe they have a basis to charge for that. What should I do?

      Also my insurance company interestingly didnt renew my tenant insurance policy ive had fot years with no change.

      Should I ask them to provide the documented charge and consider filing a claim with my insurance seeing as they're dropping me anyway? Should I ensure I have a new policy before I file that claim

      Not proud but proudly not ashamed

      11 votes
    45. I dont want Windows 11, how easy is it to use Linux?

      Im just kind of done with Windows and 10 has been stable, but 11 seems to be even more intrusive and I find all the AI 'assistance' to be incredibly annoying. Im just kind of done with MS and...

      Im just kind of done with Windows and 10 has been stable, but 11 seems to be even more intrusive and I find all the AI 'assistance' to be incredibly annoying. Im just kind of done with MS and Office and I want to try something else.

      I dont have many needs. I run LibreOffice spreadsheet and word processor and the only other software I need to work is CORELdraw and CORELpaint as I still do a fair bit of design work on them and Ive been using them for 30 years so I dont want to switch. Other than that its just browsing (Firefox), email (Thunderbird) and TurboTax.

      My question is how do I know whats going to work until I try it? And which version of Linux is easiest and most stable? I dont want to have to keep upgrading, I just want a stable usable fairly easy to learn OS that works with what Ive got as Im unlikely to be changing much. Suggestions?

      68 votes
    46. I'm thinking of starting a business making basically gatorade-type powder. Seeking advice.

      I used to make soap and body products, and I really enjoyed it. I loved making nice-smelling things that people really liked. We were really on the verge of online sales, so we went to markets and...

      I used to make soap and body products, and I really enjoyed it. I loved making nice-smelling things that people really liked. We were really on the verge of online sales, so we went to markets and sold that way. Didn't end up taking off just because we really didn't get the sales base. Online would have helped.

      I was talking recently to my wife about making her some gatorade-type hydration beverage with electrolytes. Because we're trying to save money where we can.

      I was looking up what goes into most electrolyte products, and pricing them out. What's annoying is that it would be around $75 to get what I needed. But that would give me around 1000 ½L servings, give or take.

      And with that, I went down the rabbit hole of "Why not see if I can package some up and sell?"

      At the most basic level, it would probably cost around $1.50 to create a 100-serving jar, which I could probably label and sell for something like $10 - which sounds like huge profit, but I think is probably around a reasonable level. Which would mean around 10¢ per serving to my customers.

      As I've been expanding on the idea, I feel I could offer mutiple versions:

      • The basic one that has no flavor or sweetner, just the electrolytes
      • Flavored cersions with sugar for energy, artificial sweetener for folks like me who don't want the sugar but might want the electrolyes
      • Custom blends on demand, i.e. since I have to limit my salt and potassium but could benefit from the magnesium and calcium, I might have a flavored artificial-sweetner one with just two electrolytes. I could have main flavors with color (as it makes them taste better, yay silly brains) but offer no-color blends for those that preferred

      Paired with an online shop, I think it might be enough to be interesting to people - being able to offer more flavors than the norm. And things I'm not sure some have though of - being able to add this to a protein shake, so flavors relevant to that might be interesting (i.e. getting to play with some "dessert" flavours that would be weird in a drink).

      I've got a ton of research to do - and to see how I could start hopefully under cottage food laws with less registrations and fees.

      But I'm curious to know if this sounds interesting, what ideas you have, and most importantly, if you've run your own small hobby style business in any relevant sort of way, what advice and ideas you might have to help me as I look at this possibility.

      Basically, I'm trying to keep afloat here, and I'm not picking up business clients as quickly as I need, and I think doing this would not only be fun, but perhaps profitable as well.

      18 votes
    47. Filling a crawlspace with dirt?

      So. I have what I'm sure is not a unique problem, but sure is an interesting one. The people who built my house built the foundation wrong. Instead of digging a hole, then digging a deeper trench...

      So. I have what I'm sure is not a unique problem, but sure is an interesting one.

      The people who built my house built the foundation wrong. Instead of digging a hole, then digging a deeper trench for a foundation, which insures the foundation is on compacted soil, they made a mold around the edge of the hole. Then put some sand on top.

      As you can imagine, 60 years of settling has resulted in my foundation kind of sitting on tiny plateaus of compressed sand, and those plateaus are slowly eroding away. Especially in this one spot where there was water seeping in because they also did the grade wrong.

      So anyhow, my understanding is that the best solution is to add a bunch of fill dirt into the 5ft "luxury crawlspace," compressor, and repeat until the dirt is at least level with the foundation footer. To the tune of approximately 60 cubic yards.

      As you can imagine, this is an awful lot of dirt. And the only entrance to my crawlspace is a 10sqft hole at the back of the house, far from where dirt could be delivered.

      How the hell am I supposed to do this? I feel like the most cost-effective way would be to have the exterior wall and floor of one bedroom ripped off so that the dirt can be pushed/poured directly in, and then an army of assistants spreads out the mess.

      I'm sure I could ask a contractor (and will given scope of work), but I'm trying to get a rough feel for the work required so I know if I'm being completely ripped off.

      12 votes
    48. How do I improve at interviews?

      Hello tilderinos! I'm currently on the hunt for a new job, and it's been a very long time since I've had to do any kind of real interviewing to compete for a position. I'm looking for some general...

      Hello tilderinos! I'm currently on the hunt for a new job, and it's been a very long time since I've had to do any kind of real interviewing to compete for a position. I'm looking for some general tips and, if anyone is experienced in the field of education, tips specific to teacher interviews.

      Background

      I've been working in ECE (Early Childhood Education) for 15 years. I and I male, so I buck the gender trend, and additionally I'm a bit alternative in appearance (long hair, braids, beard). I have an excellent track record (steady improvements, increasing my education and my responsibilities at work) and have been able to implement some innovative programs at my center (teaching chess, music, by far and away the best math teacher at my center).

      I recently got my BS degree in ECE, and my PEL to teach up to 2nd grade. I'm looking for a spot in a scent district or at least a nearby one to get started.


      My strengths in interviews are that I'm generally a confident speaker, I know my field well, keep pace with recent developments, and have an enormous amount of experience to draw from.

      My weaknesses are that I tend to ramble (adhd!), I lose track of multi part questions (adhd strikes again!), and I'm terrible at quickly recalling specific examples from my mountain of experience. I also feel that, especially when interviewing for positions a bit outside my experience (Eg a 2nd grade teaching position) I come across as naive at best and ignorant at worst.

      I also generally have a hard time selling myself with words. I'm very much a man of action, and would love to demonstrate my skill firsthand, but that isn't terribly easy to do in an interview setting.

      I hope this topic isn't too selfish of me and I appreciate any feedback I get! Thank you all.

      26 votes
    49. Is it possible to get short term health insurance in California?

      I was recently removed from medi-cal due to “potential fraud”. Long story short, I didn’t commit fraud. I have had zero income in over a year, have something like $1500 total, and receive no other...

      I was recently removed from medi-cal due to “potential fraud”. Long story short, I didn’t commit fraud. I have had zero income in over a year, have something like $1500 total, and receive no other benefits.

      However, I’m currently dealing with bureaucratic confusion as the trail of who is responsible has dead ended and no one seems to be clear on what happened or why.

      The medi-cal coordinator at the county social services office thinks it’s best if I just reapply but while I wait for my new application to be processed I am uninsured. Of course, if it goes through then I should have coverage dating back to the 1st of April.

      Yet, given that there’s no good reason for it to have been canceled in the first place I’m wary of placing all my eggs in that basket. And would prefer to have some sort of catastrophe insurance if at all possible.

      Is this even possible in California? It seems like short term health insurance might be banned here? Any ideas would be welcome. The whole situation is frustrating to say the least.

      18 votes