I put on Hit Man last night and about an hour into - it once some romance got going - I just.. stopped caring. I realized I just don't care.

I am strictly homosexual, important to note.

It wasn't even mainly a romantic movie. Nor a bad movie. It was pretty average but I often quite like these turn-off-your-brain type action/comedies. The weird thing is that the same director made the Before trilogy which are some of my favorite movies of all time, but maybe it's just that they're better movies?

In any case, it just kind of surprised me that I had this reaction since I usually don't mind this "tier" of movies. It's not disgust or anything either! I just.. didn't care. But if it were a gay or lesbian romance, I would have definitely been super into it.

I assume I'm not alone in this. I'm just having kind of an epiphany moment here! You'd think a 30 year old who's been out for years would have had this realization a bit earlier: we/I am not the "default" target audience.

Feels pretty weird?

Hi all,

I am in the middle of taking bids with my local HVAC companies and am looking for someone to nudge me in one direction or the other. For background, I bought my house in western Michigan, right off the lake Michigan coast near Grand Rapids, last Fall. My home inspection made it clear the AC would need work and I haven't started to feel the need for it until recently. I called an HVAC company out and when they said the unit was 25+ years old, I just told them to forget about even fixing it because it would be at least 10% of the cost of a new unit and still way less efficient.

So.

My natural gas furnace is also ~20 years old and the first HVAC guy said that if it broke down, it likely wouldn't pass a safety inspection. They said something about how the coils being dirty or positioned someway or something, I can't really recall 100% what the issue would be but the gist that I got was that when it breaks down, whether it be 1 year, 2 years, or 5 years, it won't be worth fixing or it will be unfixable. A new AC would be ~$6500 and a new furnace would be ~$7000.

So I started up the conversation towards installing a heat pump unit in instead of a standard AC unit. My initial thinking is that when the furnace goes, I have the back up ready to go instead. Now a heat pump unit is going to cost me around $2000 more. I don't think my plan will be to ever install a replacement furnace. Depending on what the solar assessment says, evaluating both ground mounted and roof mounted solar, will tell me how worth it is to go that route and have discounted or free heating and cooling.

Where the calculus gets tricky for me is there is the Inflation Reduction Act which will give me a $2000 tax credit for a heat pump. But that will come with buying a more expensive, and efficient unit, and I believe I will also have to completely get rid of the furnace I currently have since the total home system has to meet the efficiency standard. In addition, last month I replaced my fuse box with a 200 amp panel and if I meet the requirements to get the $2000 tax credit, I would also get $600 tax credit for the panel since I can tie them together.

All in all, I am looking at getting a more efficient unit for roughly the same price as the less efficient unit but without the natural gas furnace as either main heating, or back up heating. My hesitation is that natural gas is so cheap that it doesn't make sense financially to go heat pump only unless I have renewable energy to pair with it. But maybe I am just overthinking it? And maybe I have gotten something wrong in my calculations?

Any advice or clarifications would be greatly appreciated. I have one more quote coming this Thursday and I hope to make a decision by Friday to get the work started

I've got a few albums and songs that feel like they were made just for me, simply because they are obscure.

• Freedom by M-Fuge/Centrifuge - An album produced in the late 90s for a single year's program of Southern Baptist summer camps - one I didn't even attend. It's got some pretty simple but surprisingly well produced praise music. I don't believe in God, but it's a good comforting listen to me.

• They Eat Their Own - The one and only album from the very short lived band of the same name. Full of 90s grungepunk rock. Includes "Like a Drug", which actually was very briefly popular, but the rest of the songs in the album clearly didn't get the same level of attention that that song got. But the roughness is kind of appealing in it's own way.

• The entire discography of Cool Cavemen - Once again, another band that was popular enough to get signed with a record label, and actually released a few albums. They still make the list because as hard as it is to get people to listen to Funk/Rock fusion music, it's even harder to get them to listen to French music, even when their best songs are in English. I almost didn't bring them up because they're still big enough to make it onto Spotify.

I've got tons more I could talk about that are much more obscure, but they're not quite on the same scale and quite a bit more niche. Just take a look at the last album I purchased on Bandcamp.

How about you? What's some music that you like that nobody else in the world seems to be aware of?

I often think about the purpose and/or meaning of life and I've been struggling to work through these thoughts lately. As I teen I've had these thoughts often, but after experiencing my first manic episode (that led to psychosis) back in August 2022, the question of "What's the point?" pops into my head quite frequently.

Alongside this I've been struggling to come to terms with my new diagnosis of 'Bipolar Type I with psychotic features' as I've already been diagnosed with ADHD back in 2017 and I realize that both of these are life-long diagnoses. I know I just have to learn how to live with them, but that's been a tough pill to swallow.

I should mention that I'm not suicidal or anything, but rather I feel hollow and numb inside as I am very unfulfilled with life. Some days are okay and I'm still functioning and taking care of myself (so it's not like a full-blown depression), but as I mentioned before, I just don't see the point in all of this and don't find many things to be worthwhile or enjoyable anymore.

Basically I feel like a shell of my former self after my episode and have found much difficulty in enjoying the things I liked before from hobbies, to music and even food (I was a highly food-driven person). It's definitely much better than it was immediately after my episode, but it's as though life has been sucked out of me and I'm just going through the motions of living because it's what I'm supposed to do. I know recovery takes time, but it's been nearly 2 years since my episode and I thought this feeling would go away by now...

(I've also been seeing a counselor and OT and am doing things such as CBT and ACT which helped a bit, but not enough as I am here asking questions on an online forum seeking help).

If you have any advice on how to work through this it would be appreciated.

EDIT (12/6/24): I wanted to say thank you to all the responses and advice given. I may not have replied to everyone, but just know that I have been reading the comments and I do appreciate them :)

What's something you wish more people understood?

What are the common (or not so common) misconceptions you have to live underneath?

What are the parts of your experience that don't seem to be widely portrayed/known?

What do you wish more people understood because genuinely understanding that could genuinely help them too?

Addenda:

• This does not have to be strictly factual. It can be based in experiences and beliefs.

• It can be based in yourself, in a larger identity that you share with others, or something else entirely.

• Try to avoid any responses that include a spite for other people's ignorance. Center them instead in the earnest desire to be both truthful and known. (Write your response for today's lucky 10,000 rather than today's bigots.)

Event Guidelines

Everyone is welcome to participate. This includes allies! You do not need to identify as LGBT in order to join in the topics.

I will use "queer" and "LGBT" interchangeably as umbrella terms to refer to all minority sexualities and gender identities. These are intended to be explicitly inclusive.

Be kind; be gracious; listen to others; love lots.

Schedule

I won't reveal everything upfront, but with each post I will give a teaser for what's next:

June 1st: Introductions and Playlist
June 4th: Who is a historical LGBT advocate that you admire?
June 7th: What positive changes have you seen in your lifetime?
June 10th: What's something you wish more people understood?
June 13th: (teaser: a chance to understand more)
June 16th:
June 19th:
June 22nd:
June 25th:
June 28th:

If for whatever reason you would not like to see these topics in your feed, add pride month at tildes to your personal tag filters.

This is a topic that's been on my mind for a while, and I wonder what people think about it.

As everybody knows, climate crisis is worsening, is going to continue to worsen, yet the pace of reforms is not nearly enough. "Faster than expected" has even been a meme for years. What's more is that we are very hastily nearing the 1.5 Celcius degrees limit IPCC and countless other climate scientists have been warning about (For details, check out IPCC 1.5oC special report, and IPCC AR6).

Another point is that oil and traditional energy companies, their politicians, and other people working for them have done irreversable damage to humanity and many, many other species of life. Yet, generally speaking, courts don't seem to hold them accountable.

In short, there's a good deal of reason to doubt legal structures will solve the climate crisis fast enough or hold people accountable for the most part.

I suspect this might lead to "violent activism". For example, human ecology professor and activist, Andreas Malm, wrote a book calling for such action. In the book, "How to Blow Up a Pipeline", he contends that non-lethal violence, meaning sabotage, is a necessary and complementary element to peaceful activism, in order to make people in power unable to ignore this issue any longer, and make the peaceful protestors seem the "reasonable alternative", strengthening their hand. This book seems to have found some popularity among a certain crowd.

Another, less specific but still noteworthy example is the growing violent feelings among the young people regarding climate crisis. Many of them are utterly jaded to the reform process, and are openly or semi-jokingly calling for violence.

I suspect we are nearing or maybe even passed a threshold, which will lead to the rise of violent activist groups, quite possibly in the current decade. However, I'm not sure about this, as predicting the future is a very uncertain thing. What do you think, and what are the reasons behind your opinion? I'm interested in how events like this play out in human history, and I feel like, either way, we are going to witness some very important developments.

There was a question on reddit about whether rich people ever think about all the poor and starving people who are suffering while they live in luxury. It got me thinking about the "rich" more broadly, as many of the people like me who are on the internet are part of the global 1% if not the local.

I think a lot of rich people dont like to think about the idea that maybe the truly morally right thing to do would be to give up all their money and work a day job like everyone else.

So they try to avoid thinking about it at all to avoid having to constantly feel guilty about not doing the thing they know is right. Making a contribution to helping others just opens you up to other people or even your own conscience saying you could be doing more, and youll never be able to do enough to fully justify not doing so. Or alternatively you can embrace selfishness and give up on constantly trying to be a better person and never have to think about it again.

Maybe its easy to look at some billionaire and say they could lose 1/2 their money and not notice any change in their lifestyle, so they should be considered morally contemptable for not even offering a fraction of that when it could make such a difference for so many. But somewhere between that and living in poverty, there has got to be some line where your right to take care of yourself and your right to try and invest in your own future stops outweighing the shame of allowing the evils of the world to go unchallenged.

Then there is a fuzzy region around that line where its ambiguous whether you are doing enough good in the world or if you should feel morally compelled to change how you are living your life. And I think its probable the for a lot of people the place where they envision all their dreams coming true is somewhere on the negative end of the spectrum. So if your dream is to be a famous movie star, for example, at some point that dream might not be compatible with your moral imoerative to oppose classism.

Personally I hate having to work an office job. If I got the chance to make a fortune Id build a cabin in the woods and have food delivered to me and never have to deal with anything ever again. But doing so would be selfish. So I guess if I ever had the opportunity Id be corrupted by riches in a heartbeat. Which is kind of a downer of an ending to this line of thought.

Hello all, was inspired to fish for responses after seeing another user request resume feedback. Apologies if the background is on the longer side.

TLDR: Dropped out 10 years ago; have only a high school degree and university transfer credits. Conflicted between finishing my degree online while working full time, vs. specializing in a niche tech stack (Salesforce) via current employment. Looking for any input because I'm prone to decision paralysis.

Are there any other people on Tildes who regularly use VR?

• What has the experience been like for you?
• Which headset do you own?
• What do you use it for?
• Do you use it regularly?
• Any favorite/recommended games/apps?

What positive changes have you seen in your lifetime?

Last week we looked at people in the past, but this week I want us to turn the focus more towards ourselves and the experiences we've had.

I want you to think back across the span of your particular life and identify the positive changes that you've personally witnessed regarding LGBT people and causes.

Addenda:

• These positive things can be at any level: yourself, your friend(s), your family, your community, your country, society, the world at large, etc.

• These positive changes do not have to be "big" or political (though they certainly can be). It is perfectly fine to share your own small, personal stories. If they're positive, then they count!

• These can come from any domain: personal life, law, entertainment, science, careers, etc.

• I'm certainly aware that there are still many negative things that hurt us and our community out there. I don't want this topic to be something that paints a false, saccharine picture of our world, but I think it's important to take broad and open stock of situations and remind ourselves of any positives. Not only is Pride partly about hope, but focusing on positives can be a powerful tool against despair.

Event Guidelines

Everyone is welcome to participate. This includes allies! You do not need to identify as LGBT in order to join in the topics.

I will use "queer" and "LGBT" interchangeably as umbrella terms to refer to all minority sexualities and gender identities. These are intended to be explicitly inclusive.

Be kind; be gracious; listen to others; love lots.

Schedule

I won't reveal everything upfront, but with each post I will give a teaser for what's next:

June 1st: Introductions and Playlist
June 4th: Who is a historical LGBT advocate that you admire?
June 7th: What positive changes have you seen in your lifetime?
June 10th: (teaser: maybe a chance to be better understood?)
June 13th:
June 16th:
June 19th:
June 22nd:
June 25th:
June 28th:

If for whatever reason you would not like to see these topics in your feed, add pride month at tildes to your personal tag filters.

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like kagi, birth control and thieves. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was bemused.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

Hi all- throwing myself on the goodwill of the community.

I'm currently planning an approximately 10 day trip to Germany this December with my wife and our two boys (6 and 10).

I am constrained by the will of the people as follows:

My Wife: Wants to see the Christmas markets in Cologne and wherever else they may be in the cities we go through. Cologne is a must, though.

My elder son: Is obsessed with tanks and really wants to see the German Tank Museum in Munster (Lower Saxony not Munster in Westphalia). Honestly, so would I.
He had also really wanted to see the u-boat preserved at the German Maritime Museum in Bremerhaven so Bremen seemed like a good midpoint. It turns out the ship exhibitions are closed during winter alas. In any case I'm not closely wedded to Bremen specifically but I will need to take a day trip to the Tank Museum from a nearby city. Staying specifically in Munster seems counterproductive as it appears to be a rather small town (I'm willing to do so if anyone has good things to say about it).

I'm stuck with these dates too, as I have to be elsewhere by the 21st for Christmas celebrations.

Currently the broad strokes are as follows:

10 Dec (Tues)
AM: Land in Frankfurt 0610. Connect to Cologne via train
PM: Check in to hotel. Cologne Christmas markets

11 Dec (Weds)
AM & PM: Tourist stuff in Cologne

12 Dec (Thurs)
AM: Connect to Bremen via train
PM: Wander Bremen old town

13 Dec (Fri)
AM: Rent car, drive to German Tank Museum in Munster
PM: Back to Bremen, check out Christmas markets

14 Dec (Sat)
AM: Connect to Berlin via train
PM: Check into hotel, get orientated

15- 18 Dec (Sun- Weds)
See Things In Berlin (would be glad for suggestions here)

19 Dec (Thurs)
AM Connect to Frankfurt via train
PM Last minute sightseeing Frankfurt

20 Dec (Fri)
AM Fly off from Frankfurt Airport

Would be grateful for any feedback and/or suggestions.

I'm not sure if this would be better for ~music, ~tech, or what, but after messing around with Udio for a bit, I made some stuff I liked and wanted to get folks' thoughts. Imo, it's incredible to be able to get music from a text prompt - it means I, as someone who is mostly ignorant to music production, can have my musical idea and actually render that out as music for someone to hear. I can think "damn that would be cool" and then in kind of a fuzzy way, make it happen then and there. Whether it's good, I don't know. That's not up to me, really, but it is the kind of sound I wanted to happen, so I'm left conflicted on how to feel about it. Figured it would be worthwhile to show folks some of it, and see what they think.

I do enjoy synth and metal, so there's a lot of that in these. Feel free to be as critical as you like. If I can apply your criticism I will try to do it, and if you want to see how that works out, I'll share.

1. Cosmoterrestrial
2. A Floyd, Pinkly
3. Empire's Demise, Foretold
4. Metal for Ghosts Bedsheet Edition (the very end of this one is hilariously appropriate)
5. Multi-3DS Drifting

And here's a link to my profile, if you would like to browse. It will update too when I put more up.

They're all instrumental. Lyrical music is less appealing to me in general and Udio's voices do sound kinda weird to me more often than not. The way I made the tracks, I would start with a clip combining some genres/moods, and then add to either end of the clip until I had a complete song. Along the way, I could introduce new elements/transitions by using more text/tweaking various settings and flipping "manual mode" on and off. The results were fuzzy; I didn't always get what I wanted, but I could keep trying until I did, or until I got something that sounded "better". I wrote all the titles after the song was finished. The album art is from a text prompt.

I'm not sure what I think, to be honest. On the one hand, a lot of the creative decision-making wasn't mine. On the other, the song would not be what it is without me making decisions about how it came about and what feelings/moods/genres were focused upon/utilized. I think the best I can say is "use the tool and see whether it's enough to count". To me it feels almost 50/50, like I've "collaborated with my computer" rather than "made music". Does it matter? If the sound is the intended sound, the sound I hoped to make and wanted to share, is that enough to say it is "my music"? Is this perhaps just what it looks like to be a beginner in a different paradigm?

When I used Suno, I had a much more rigid opinion. What it produced, I called "computer spit". Because, all I could actually control was telling it to continue, changing the prompt, and giving it structure/genre tags that felt like a coin flip in terms of effectiveness. I had a really hard time trying to get it to keep/recall melody, and my attempts to guide it along felt more like gambling than deliberate decisions. It also couldn't keep enough in context to make the overall song consistent with respect to instrumentation. It's different with Udio, both because you have a lot of additional tools, and because it feels like those tools work more consistently at making the model do what you want. I still call the results "computer spit" where I've shown them off, but I'm unsure now whether the production has enough of myself in it to be something more. Perhaps not on the same level as something someone produced by playing an instrument, or choosing samples/arranging things in software, but also not quite the same as the computer just rolling along, with me going "thumbs up" or "thumbs down". Maybe these distinctions don't actually matter, but I'd be curious if anyone has thoughts along these lines.

I'm intentionally trying to avoid a discussion about the morality of the thing or what political/social ramifications it has, not because I don't care about that but because I'm in the middle of trying to understand the tool and what its results mean. Would you consider what I've posted here work I could claim as my own, or do you think the computer has enough of a role to say it's not? Is my role in the production large enough? Or perhaps you have a stronger position, that nothing the computer can possibly do in this way counts as original music. Does any of this change that position for you? I ask because I've gone through a lot of opinions myself as I've been following things, and one interesting bit is that I have not gotten any copyright notices when I've uploaded the music to Youtube (I did get notices with Suno's music). As far as I can tell, with what is available to me, this is all original.

And of course, the most important one: Did you like it? Is there something you think would make them better? Do they all suffer from something I'm not seeing/hearing? I'm not an expert technician nor a music producer, so perhaps my ignorant ears are leading me astray. Either way, I've had a ton of fun doing this, and the results to my ear are fun to listen to while I'm doing stuff. I wouldn't call any of it the best music I've ever heard, but I can also think of a lot that is worse. I think what I wonder the most is whether it comes off bland/plain. Most of the folks I show things to are a bit too caught up in being astounded/disturbed to really give me much feedback, so perhaps putting the request in this form will work out a bit better - ya'll have time to think on it.

As always, your time and attention is greatly appreciated

Edit: I should clarify. I am not attempting to be a musician. Hence calling it "computer spit" with anything public, and the lack of any effort to pitch it as something I did only on my own. Rather, I recognize the limit of my own understanding, and felt I'd hit a point where my ignorance of production meant I could not judge the results as well as I'd like. That means it's time to engage some folks because folks out there are likely to know what I do not and see things I can't. From that angle, a lot of the discussion is very interesting, and I'll be responding to those in a bit. But there's no need to argue for doing the work - I recognize that. I'm trying to see past my own horizons with a medium I don't put the work into. I'm a consumer of music, not a creator, so getting some perspective from folks more acquainted with creating and with the technology is really what I'm after in sharing the experience.

Edit again: Thank you all for a very interesting discussion. I had a spare evening/morning and this was a good use of it. For the sake of tying a bow on the whole thing, I'll share my takeaways as succinctly as I can manage.

It seems, at present, and at best, the role these tools can play is of a sort of personal noise generator. The output is not of sufficient interest, quality, complexity, etc., to really be regarded the same as human-produced music, is the overall impression I have been left with. And for other reasons, it may be that the fuzziness of it all is a permanent feature, and thus a permanent constraint on how far toward "authentic" the results can ever get. I was trying to avoid a discussion about my own creativity, the value of doing work, societal ramifications, etc., so I'll work on how to present things better. For what it's worth, this has all been part of what I do creatively - my area of study was philosophy, and the goal of that to my mind has always been "achieving clarity". So I am attempting to achieve clarity with things as they develop, as a hobby sort of interest while I'm busy doing completely different stuff and to better protect my own mind against dumb marketing and hype. So once again, I appreciate you all taking the time, and I wish you all well in all the things you do.

I live in a country that's extremely dominated by the right. Leftist people are almost non-existent, and it's even often used as an insult. By leftist I just don't mean it in the anti-capitalist sense, but also for cultural stuff like not being a homophobe, racist, misogynist, etc. In fact, these are even more important qualities in this context.

I've gone through and am still going through my fair share of ideological growth. Even though I've always been progressive by the standards of my country, well, it was a low bar. So I had to unlearn a lot of things, and learn a much more critical approach. I'm a constant learner, and I'm interested in politics, so in the long run it's changed me a lot.

Another thing is that I've always had a strong egalitarian tendency since my childhood. I think this is an important trait that enabled me to grow past the conservative hierarchies. I'm really glad I did, and I plan on continuing to do so. However, this came at a personal cost I deem great.

Simply put, I have a lot of trouble connecting with people anymore. I still can connect with people at some level as long as we don't talk about politics, but it's an important area to me, and more importantly, as a human being, I don't think I will ever be able to overlook someone who grossly objectifies women every day, expresses queerphobic sentiments constantly, jokes about violence against minorities regularly, or genuinely wants pogroms to happen to minorities.

This is not a single person, but it's the general attitude of the population here. Men tend to make more edgy reactionary remarks, but women aren't that different politics-wise either. Some of my friends are left or left-leaning, but most of them are right-wingers who say and believe in stuff like that.

I've tried to be understanding, see it from a different angle, tried to consider that people are 3-dimensional. But there's a limit. Both because I grew, and because some of them regressed, I now look at these people and feel like I'm a complete stranger. As a person who bonds with people hard, this is extremely upsetting to me. Loneliness has been a burden of mine for a long time for various reasons, but in the last few years I was finally starting feel like I had found a social circle I could truly belong to. Despite all the stuff I mentioned, in personal relations, these people had qualities I found quite positive and precious at the time. For example, they were much less the stereotypical "feelings are for women" type of guys, which are extremely common here. Maybe first time in my life, I was feeling truly at home. It's probably why I struggled for years to keep it going.

For a very long time, I tried having talks with them, explain stuff to them, listen to them. They didn't work. I tried being aggressive, because they are still kind of dudely dudes who sometimes "respect" a dominant attitude, but that didn't work either. I feel like they are truly lost, and infuriatingly, unapologetically reactionary.

I fear that if I abandon them I won't be able to find a new social circle like this one. I have international friends as well, and I love them, but anyone can guess that for some stuff you want local people to bond with.

Part of my frustration is due to how most people here tend to follow comically evil beliefs. If this was just a rare occurance, I wouldn't have reacted this strongly, because I'd know there were a lot of egalitarian people. But they are an extreme minority. The dehumanization is suffocating.

There isn't much to add. This is a cost I didn't consider would come to pass, but I think I've outgrown these people, except for a few friends who I appreciate. It's demoralizing losing your social circle again at this age, to start all over. Again. But I think it's mostly unavoidable, because I am done trying to be tolerant of their evil.

Has anyone gone through, or is going through, something similar? What was or is your experience like?

I write this topic knowing that it might get removed for being too controversial or incendiary or bring the anti-Semites out of the woodwork, in which case, I understand why this topic might get removed.

I am just hoping that tildes has a better capacity of engaging in such a charged topic, at least more than reddit.

onto my question:

Like anyone else who watches the news, I have been pretty aware of what is going on in the latest escalation of the Israel-Palestine war. I would not claim to be the most educated person ever, but I'd like to think I at least understand the broad-strokes.

And I consider myself generally a progressive person (not a liberal) so I personally am not a big fan of the Israeli govt. And yes I do condemn Hamas, I don't care what your struggle is, Oct 7th was a terror attack and only makes the situation worse for the people you claim to be freedom fighters for.

Having said all that, and seeing how much control Israel seems to have on the western powers, or specifically U.S., I will admit, my thoughts sometimes veer towards "they really do control things" and shit like that, but then 10 seconds later, I realize how ye-like that sounds and it's the exact same kind of thinking that led to the Holocaust. But then I also wonder if that is not entirely my fault and more because of the Jewish leaders who insist on making fervent support of Israel a strong part of their identity, thereby linking any criticism of the Israeli govt with criticism of Jewish people (or at least the Jewish leaders in the media who are supportive of Israel) rather than distancing themselves from a right-wing government.

So yea, I guess my question is: I don't think its entirely unreasonable to think that Israel has a surprising amount of control over western powers (specifically U.S.) but that sentiment in and of itself also veers dangerously close to antisemitism for my liking so I wondered how folks on here approach it?

Who is a historical LGBT advocate that you admire?

We, in 2024, come from a long lineage of people who have fought for and advocated for queer causes and identities. We have those who came before us to thank for many of our rights, the terminology that we apply to ourselves, and even our very own self-concepts. The dignity that many of us are able to live with today is only possible because of people who asserted, against often significant pushback, that our dignity should be non-negotiable.

I think it would be great if we could all share some of their stories here. It's a way of keeping their memories alive, honoring their contributions, and saying thank you for the path that they laid and upon which we now walk.

Please share the story of at least one historical figure that was an LGBT advocate that you admire. Please do not just link to a Wikipedia page or an article about them -- take the time to tell us their story in your own words.

If you do not have one in mind immediately, that's fine! This is also a great opportunity to do some research. Wikipedia has a good starting point, but feel free to explore on your own.

A few addenda:

• Feel free to connect their story to your own experiences and share why you, personally, find them admirable.

• For the purposes of this post, "historical" does not mean "ancient." If the person came before you and was a trailblazer for queer causes, then they count!

• The person themselves does not have to actively identify as someone under the LGBT umbrella. Straight allies can be trailblazers too, as can historical figures whose specific identities were ambiguous or don't map on to our modern identities and terminology.

• The individual's advocacy does not have to specifically be political in nature. Many historical figures were queer advocates simply by openly being themselves. That absolutely counts!

Event Guidelines

Everyone is welcome to participate. This includes allies! You do not need to identify as LGBT in order to join in the topics.

I will use "queer" and "LGBT" interchangeably as umbrella terms to refer to all minority sexualities and gender identities. These are intended to be explicitly inclusive.

Be kind; be gracious; listen to others; love lots.

Schedule

I won't reveal everything upfront, but with each post I will give a teaser for what's next:

June 1st: Introductions and Playlist
June 4th: Who is a historical LGBT advocate that you admire?
June 7th: (teaser: you might have to look back in time again, but this time a little closer to home)
June 10th:
June 13th:
June 16th:
June 19th:
June 22nd:
June 25th:
June 28th:

If for whatever reason you would not like to see these topics in your feed, add pride month at tildes to your personal tag filters.

Ive been in the home rental business for 35 years, enough time to see the same scenario before, but it leaves me just as vexed this time as it has before.

The issue is a young couple, about 23 years old, who have been together for a year. She is openly and admittedly 'madly in love' with her boyfriend, going so far as to announce on the initial walk through, that they want the suite because "its so quiet and peaceful and we are going to have a baby here" A bit too much information.

They were fine during the interview, and all their checks were passable - both former landlords I contacted gave them a thumbs up for paying their rent on time and keeping the place clean. Everything was fine except for his credit score which was very poor - but thats not unusual for someone that young who is still learning how to control their finances.

There is another young couple in the lower suite and they met and exchanged pleasantries and seemed to hit it off initially. But one week in, I got the first text from the basement tenants saying that there was yelling and screaming upstairs. I was startled because it seemed unusual compared to the public face they presented. I asked the tenants to inform me if it happened again. Maybe it was just one very bad day I hoped.

It did happen again. The next day at 5 am they were shouting so loudly that I could hear them over the basement tenants phone. I asked the tenants to call the police because it was domestic violence. They were about to call when everything went quiet again and they chose to wait.

There was a lull for a bit and then the third week I got an early morning text again. This time they were not only yelling at each other, they were screaming at another couple, friends supposedly, who were staying with them. There was loud banging and "it sounded like chairs being thrown around"

I told them to call the police, which they did this time but by the time the police arrived everything was calm again. Moments after they left though, everything erupted and the two guys ended up in a fight on the back lawn, Fists went flying and someone got punched although at this point its unclear who punched whom.

The police were called back and according to the account I got, the boyfriend was arrested. He says he wasn't and the police wont give me the report without his permission.

So yesterday I went to talk to them and inspect the house. I cant see any visible damage however it could easily be hidden by the goods piled against the wall, they're still unpacking as they've only been in for a month.

And then my dilemma begins. I KNOW this is a toxic relationship. Ive met this kind of guy before. Smooth talker, good looking, believes he can charm anyone any time. When I told him about the three reports of excessive noise and violence his first reaction was "it won't happen again" and his second was "I will call the other tenants and explain, Im sure we can work this out"

No buddy, no you cant. Because you're an abuser. And you'll do what all abusers do. You'll try to quiet the noise for a time, try to make your girlfriend use a forced whisper instead of an open cry, but it will only be a matter of a week or two and you're going to lose your temper again and we'll be right back where we are now, but probably even worse, because your character has been exposed.

And then I struggle with my place as a landlord but also as a caring human. I LIKE these people. They were charming and fun to get to know. I did extra work for them, getting new appliances in place because she's a specialty cook and loves to be in the kitchen. I made sure everything was 100% because I wanted them to be happy and have a nice place for them and if it happened, their new baby.

But now Im very concerned for her future. She doesnt seem to realize just how deep she is into this toxic mess of a relationship. His comment was 'we fight like most couples' and I abruptly cut him off: "NO! NOT like most couples! Most couples dont wake up the neighbors at 5 am with a screaming match and have a fist fight on the lawn where the cops get called" He looked slightly sheepish for a second and then went right back to his charm defense, saying he would work it out and they just needed 'another chance'.

The reason I think I may want to say more is because of Mercedes. She and her boyfriend rented from me about 10 years ago. It was the same scenario - charming, good looking but very angry boyfriend who lost his temper and went around the house damaging walls and smashing a porcelain sink. He was so rabid I actually brought a friend along to give them their eviction notice because I feared for my safety. That wasnt unjustified and his rage was palpable and extremely scary.

But when he was out of the room I asked Mercedes if she was ok. She said she was nervous, scared, but ok. I said 'I hope you're not going to go with him when he leaves' and she shook her head. The light bulb had come on. "No, the second he's out the door Im out of here. I hope I never see him again." Thank god she was finally seeing things clearly.

I came across her again a year ago online and just sent a friendly hello and if she remembered me and the house. She not only remembered me, she thanked me for helping her escape her hellish relationship. She said she was now in a very good and loving relationship and she couldn't believe how blind she was to even move in with Mr. Toxic in the first place. She said their eviction was a important turning point in her life.

And I see Mercedes in this new tenant. Im just not sure she realizes what she's got herself into. Or else she does and she's not sure how to get out because I cant imagine how violent his reaction would be if she tried to leave.

Which leaves me stuck. They are new to this area. They said they dont have many friends and family is a long way away, so there's no one close who is seeing what the basement tenants and I saw. And we're not sure what to do. The basement tenants are so scared of him they dont even want to be in the same house.

What do you say or not say to someone in this situation? Saying nothing seems irresponsible. Saying too much seems dangerous at least to her safety. So... what do you do? How do I figure out if she even wants help? And if I say something too soon, or too late, he may turn on her and get even more violent...

background: I've been reading nonfiction a bunch recently, and I take notes on most books that I read, either writing in the margins or in a notebook. I really like writing in margins but (a) if it's a pretty hardcover I feel bad about it, (b) it means I can't check out library books, and (c) I am reading too much nonfiction and running out of shelf space so I need to switch to a mix of library and digital lol.

I also want my notes to be somewhat multimedia - e.g. links to wikipedia, pasting in relevant images (e.g. maps) without relying on my awful art skills, etc. I do NOT want to type my notes, I want to handwrite.

I have used OneNote a lot on a touchscreen monitor for e.g. notes during Advent of Code, scratch paper for puzzles, etc. I like OneNote a lot and I would be happy to use this for the software, but I don't have my heart set on it if there's something else that works similarly. I do want a tabbed navigation like OneNote has so that e.g. I can have a page of abbreviations, a page with a timeline, a page with a list of important names, etc, for a history book

I have also used iPads as scratch paper before, but not for dedicated note taking. It seems fine-ish but I'm not sure how it would do with inserting pictures etc, and not sure what other software there is for note taking available. I would also like to be able to access my notes on my Windows PC, so not sure if iOS is the best option?

One other concern is I want whatever it is to be easy to hold while I also have a (possibly large) book in my lap.

Does anyone do notes like this? Do you have a setup you like?

Recently I just finished Hitman: World of Assassination's campaign, where the main campaign is basically a tutorial for the main "meat" of the game, i.e. contracts, Freelancer, and pushing down your assassination time for the story missions.

I really like that style of game, on this site famously I'm always talking about Monster Hunter which functions similarly (main campaign into grinding out for materials and decos), and was wondering if anyone else had any similar games.

I think roguelikes fit this a bit too, but for the sake of this topic not devolving into "what's your favorite roguelike", hopefully there are different suggestions! (Backpack Hero does something like this lol)

Not sure if this is a "home improvement" topic, but I didn't see anywhere else relevant this would fit so I am going to drop it here.

I've lived in the same place for around 12 years now. Before I moved in, the place was owned by one other person for around 10 years. The place is probably ~20 years old. I have two toilets in the house. About 5 years after I moved in, the flushing mechanisms on one of the toilets stopped working and I inspected it and it looked like the bobber/float switch was busted to the point where when it got to max height, the water flow wouldn't shut off.

I pulled up a couple articles on the internet and it seemed like the parts were pretty straight forward to replace. So I went to Lowes, got the replacement parts needed and a few hours later, toilet was fixed. No big deal. About a year later the other toilet started acting up in the same manner so I just did the same thing. Both toilets had the original parts in them. They were all metal parts. The replacement parts were a brand called "FluidMaster" and I didn't really think much of it at the time. The replacement parts were almost entirely plastic.

So fast forward to today, and I have replaced the innards of the toilets on a fairly routine basis. It seems like every 18 months or so, I am having to replace the innards of the toilets because the float switch starts to fail. I came home from a day vacation on Saturday evening to find that one of the toilets was running and for god knows how long. I open the lid and sure enough, bobber is at the top, but the float switch hadn't disabled the water flow so the toilet just keeps running. I turned off the water to it and made a note that I'll have to go back to Lowes and pick up more parts. This will be the fourth or fifth replacement I've had to do on it.

What's going on here? Why are these float switches in these kits breaking so frequently? Does anyone else have this problem? Am I just buying the wrong parts continuously? Is there a better set of parts that I can buy to correct this issue?

While an extraordinarily long read, I appreciated

I just don't know what to read next.

This was a lot of high fantasy to take in!

I'm likely to resume my read of Band of Brothers, having seen the HBO series twice already. I'm aware of several deviations from the book; that's not relevant here.

But what next? Looking for thought and feeling provoking reads that evoke hope. Could be non-fiction or fiction.

Suggestions?

Event Overview

June 1st marks the beginning of Pride Month for many countries around the world, and we're going to have our own little celebration here on Tildes!

I have come up with ten different discussion topics centered on sharing, celebrating, and understanding queer life and experiences. I will post one every four days throughout the month of June.

Everyone is welcome to participate. This includes allies! You do not need to identify as LGBT in order to join in the topics. Also, I will use "queer" and "LGBT" interchangeably as umbrella terms to refer to all minority sexualities and gender identities. These are intended to be explicitly inclusive.

Schedule

I won't reveal everything upfront, but with each post I will give a teaser for what's next:

June 1st: Introductions and Playlist
June 4th: (teaser: you might have to look back in time a little bit)
June 7th:
June 10th:
June 13th:
June 16th:
June 19th:
June 22nd:
June 25th:
June 28th:

#1 - Introductions and Playlist

This is the inaugural post -- the beginning of our little month-long discussion topic Pride Parade!

There are two tasks for this post:

1. Introduce yourself to everyone and share any information about yourself that you feel comfortable sharing. Who are you? How do you identify? What’s important for people to know about you? Are you excited about anything? Are you doing anything for Pride Month IRL?

2. A good Pride Month needs a good Pride Playlist! Link to some of your favorite queer-themed songs or tracks from LGBT artists so that we can crowdsource an awesome collection of music to listen to throughout the month.

If for whatever reason you would not like to see these topics in your feed, add pride month at tildes to your personal tag filters.

The May 2024 Backlog Burner event is officially over!

Over the course of the month of May, 13 participants moved 105 games out of their backlogs.

There were 7 bingo wins (5 Standard and 2 Golf).
Congratulations to @aphoenix, @CannibalisticApple, @Durinthal, @Eidolon, @kfwyre, @Weldawadyathink, and @Wes!

Also, congratulations to all other participants as well: @Carrow, @J-Chiptunator, @Mendanbar, @Notcoffeetable, @semsevfor, and @Shevanel

Finally, appreciation to those who didn't play any games but still popped in to talk about them with us: @brews_hairy_cats and @Wafik

It has been an absolute blast doing this with everyone. Thank you all for participating.

Use this topic to post your final bingo cards, give recaps of your games, and share any thoughts you have on the event itself.

Reminder: the Backlog Burner will now run on a regular schedule during every May and November. Our next event is only five months away!

Highlights:

• We averaged 8.1 games per person and 23.7 games per week
• There were 203 comments posted across 5 different topics
• Four different games were each played twice: Chop Goblins, Life Is Strange, Okami HD, and Wizard of Legend
• We played games that started with every letter of the alphabet except for K and Z
• @J-Chiptunator: "I played more games seriously than I did for the past 5 years"
• @semsevfor: "I started something Ive been putting off for 14 years"
• @aphoenix completed a Bingo Golf win with just 5 games
• If you would like an unequivocally definitive guide to Boomer Shooters, then @Shevanel has got you covered
• Likewise, @Wes has got you covered should you be in the market for Soulsborne mods
• It wasn’t until I compiled the final game list that I realized the game is called (the) Gnorp Apologue instead of Analogue

Quick links:

• Backlog Bingo Site
• Week 1 Discussion and Event Guidelines
• Week 2 Discussion
• Week 3 Discussion
• Week 4 Discussion
• Week 5(ish) Discussion

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

Hiya folks,

I work remotely, and I've got a little deck with a table and umbrella that I like to work at for most of the summer. The trouble is, my umbrella can never be fully angled to shade me from the sun.

I find my laptop screen (13") to be woeful for working on outside. Not only is it tiny and promotes bad posture, it also doesn't have amazing brightness. Lots of squinting and hunching, depending on the sun!

Every monitor in my house it turns out is 350 nits, except my laptop screen, which is 500 nits.

Does anyone have practical experience lugging a monitor outside and working on it during the sunny day? If so, what brightness gets you over the usability threshold?

It seems like I could get a 1000 nit monitor relatively easily. Anything above 1000 the market seems to narrow quite quickly.

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like gerrymandering, search results and shoplifting. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was flummoxed.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

I'm right on the edge of buying a mini split for our shop space and I'm having a bout of indecisiveness.

To preface, we are located in south/central Texas. The shop is a standalone structure, is fairly well insulated but has a 2-car garage door and a single-pane window, so it isn't ideal. It's 625sqft with 9 foot ceilings. We have various tools that will be in use but nothing that creates excessive heat.

We are quite limited in funds so I'm not going with an HVAC company, nor am I going with a mr cool or other diy friendly unit due to cost. I'm capable to do the install myself, I'm not overly concerned about that.

I was originally looking at the 18k (1.5ton) senville leto. I ran various calculators and they all suggested this size would be enough up to 1000sqft or so. However, since I have 9 ft ceilings and I live in a hot climate and I have the big door and crappy window, the calculations pushed my 625sqft up to around 900 or so equivalent sqft in some cases and in others as high as 1200.

Due to my circumstances, I think I've convinced myself to move up to the 24k unit instead. I don't think it's too over provisioned for my specific scenario but I would like to hear your thoughts on how off the mark I am here.

Apart from size, there's also the question of efficiency. The other model I was looking at is the Aura by senville, and the difference is a higher seer2 rating and energy star certification.

Now, doing rough math, the difference in efficiency would be paid off by the savings of the more efficient unit in something like 8 or 9 years based on projected usage and my energy costs. I'm a pessimistic person and don't expect this unit to last 8-10 years. This is a cheap way to get the space comfortable to work in so that my side business can progress, and I would think if it's still going in that amount of time, I'll be able to afford a nicer unit by then.

However, after saying all that, I do notice that the capabilities of the Aura unit are greater. It is advertised to work in -20f weather while the leto works in as low as 5f.

Now, being in Texas, my primary concern is cooling, not heating, but no where can I find if the Aura system is more capable in hotter weather like it is in colder weather. This is slightly concerning because it seems most people use these primarily as heat sources and secondarily as cooling sources, and my situation is reversed.

Does anyone have any input as to whether the higher efficiency system will make a noticable difference in cooling performance when it's 110f outside?

Thanks for weathering my wall of text.

I'm finding it more and more frustrating having to parse the things I'm actually looking for from what feels like a deluge of rubbish. Are there any strategies, extensions, add-ons, etc that people are using to filter results?

After spending a couple years in management I want to get back into more individual contributor roles. It's where I can apply the skills I actually enjoy. Preferably I'd work as a dev or data scientist, but what I want is to spend time solving technical/mathematical problems and less herding cats and politicking.

EDIT: US with ability to relocate; willing to take a paycut.

Current plans:

• Attend more meet ups, there are a couple about an hour south of me. Hoping to build some connections with the local industry.
• Private server and website stood up, plan to host projects etc here for interested parties.
• Runs through exercism.io to refresh on some stuff.
• Find some open source projects to contribute on? There is also a local group of indie game devs, perhaps offer my services where possible.

So my question to you all is how would you go about sharpening skills and building up a portfolio?

I saw a video by Throttle House with this premise and thought it was a fun one. What three cars or trucks would you want in your budget garage?

Let's assume that you can only buy vehicles legal in your country, but that there are no costs for importing. For instance, it might be illegal to import or drive a car with the steering on the opposite side as normal, so that's out. But you can import a legal car for no additional cost. Prices are today's prices, but if your prices are not in US$ then don't feel obligated to be exact down to the dollar/euro/CHF since exchange rates fluctuate. And to keep things easy, there is no VAT/sales tax.

If you'd prefer to spec out a wishlist for a country you'd like to live in (like Japan or Germany) you may do that instead, but same import rules apply. :)

Recently, I went to a meetup for a blog I follow. I was expecting and (in part) hoping for it to be really strange. Similarly to this post "Developers Aren't Nerds", I think a part of me held the expectation that I really would become an adult who sat around with other people who read something intellectually stimulating and joyfully kind of debated it amongst ourselves. Sort of like being on Tildes or any good forum. And being around these people and the environment was fun-- it was mostly casual, but when it wasn't, I felt challenged and like I was talking about things I cared about. And above all, unlike being online, it still felt human-- there wasn't that weird anxiety of saying something and getting piled on.

I'm blessed to have a pretty good life, which includes (now) a fairly diverse and broad social life I worked to grow. I believe there is emotional support too (though I have a smaller circle for that). But it feels like we spend more time talking about (their) travel, music festivals, clubbing, whatever. And I know part of the issue is that I don't "get" it (I am an introvert, I like small groups), or I did enough of those experiences and feel sated for the time. But man, would I like to be a little weird and just randomly talk about the random shit my head puts together after reading. (Today, it was global fertility rate projections, sperm counts, IVF. Other times it was blockchain and other architectures I was learning about. Overall, things that are difficult to bring up randomly.)

Do people have that outlet offline? Where did you find it?

Every single backpack I've seen that is functional and has at least some basic organizational features (see Bellroy, Peak Design, Alpaka, etc.) is usually pretty ugly and makes you look like a weird tech bro. And every single backpack that looks good is usually made by a fashion company (eg Zara, Pull&Bear or luxury brands like Prada) and don't have any utility features, only a single big pocket and maybe a laptop sleeve if you're lucky.

I have managed to find one backpack that looks awesome and is actually useful - Sympl Day Backpack. However, I'm out of luck here, because it has been discontinued by the company, and their other backpack models also have that "tech nerd" look to them (although they're not as bad as some other options)

Do you, by any chance, know some backpacks that both look fashionable AND have more than two pockets at the same time?

Edit: there's also Topo Design Daypack Classic which looks good in the black and white variant, but it does lack some useful stuff like laptop sleeve padding

Edit 2: I managed to find another awesome looking backpack! The ISM Bag. I might actually get this one, although $300 is somewhat expensive

tl;dr: 3D printing won't change your life but it will make your life 1% better in unexpected ways.

Last year, I spent a year-long work trip with someone who was very into 3D printing. To be frank, I initially had zero interest in it. From what I understood of 3D printing, it was expensive, required mechanical experience, coding knowledge, and ultimately not worth what you put into it.

Fortunately, my colleague didn't care what I thought about his hobby and bought a cheap printer to keep himself occupied during downtime at work. Originally, it was just something that occasionally made noise in the background. As the days went on, however, more and more doodads began to appear around the office. A cable organizer here, a desk decoration there; nothing earth-shattering.

The thing that really changed my mind, funny enough, was a simple powder scooper. During our trip, we shared a terribly designed creatine bottle with a narrow neck and no scooper. We spent months pouring out white powder by eyesight alone like amateur crackheads and I will never buy this bottle again. My colleague printed out a scooper with a long neck and the problem went away.

That was the key turnaround that changed my mindset - I had a problem; we printed a solution.

I got back from my trip and decided to try it out myself. After some serious deliberation on how committed I was to this, I purchased the Bambu P1S. It’s not the cheapest option for someone just starting and I chose a Bambu printer because a Youtuber argued that your best way to have fun as a beginner was to pick a printer that “just worked.” It was a compelling enough reason for me to shell $900. (no, I’m not sponsored, just telling my story.)

Some of my favorite prints:

• Long Scooper: the one that started it all for me. This scooper saved us a ridiculous amount of time and effort for what it is. It also gets to the heart of what 3D printing is to me - solving your individual problems with simple solutions.

• Pill Organizer: it’s got a lever that spins a wheel around, opening a different chamber for each day of the week. This one really opened my eyes to what is mechanically possible with just basic PLA plastic. People much smarter than me figured out ways to print devices with hinges, springs, and levers all without needing a single extra tool.

• Scour Pad Holder: This is the one that made most people around me go, “huh, that’s pretty neat.” You’re right, it is. No one likes touching a moist scour pad.

• Slide Wallet: I spent $74 on a SECRID cardslide wallet. While I don’t regret that purchase - I used it faithfully for four years ongoing - I did feel a bit foolish when I realized I could 3D print the same mechanism for $1.50.

That’s not to say anything about the decorative / gifting aspect of 3D printing either. I 3D printed a giant Charizard for my friend’s son the size of his head in eight hours.

That said, there is a mechanical learning curve to even the most user-friendly printers. With the Bambu series, I’d say that if you’ve ever built IKEA furniture or a 100+ piece Lego, assembly is pretty straightforward. It’s the troubleshooting that will get you. Even with basic filament and simple projects, I still encountered the nozzle clogging, filament stuck in the pipes, and bed adhesion problems.

This is a hobby that requires you to be willing to experiment and look up solutions. From what I understand, some printer brands are tougher than others so the learning curve will vary depending on your gear. I quickly learned that there’s numerous ways your print will mess up and your project will look like what the community calls the “spaghetti monster.” Unless you’re a born tinkerer, this is probably the most frustrating part of the process. However, accumulating knowledge to diagnose and solve the problem is very rewarding. I learned that the third slot on a Bambu machine is statistically more likely to jam and 0.5 kg spools are more likely to clog than 1.0 kg ones. Turns out that a lithophane needs to be printed vertically and only looks good with a white filament.

Overall, I enjoyed my time with my 3D printer and I don’t regret my purchase at all. It’s a hobby that provides near-instant gratification - you find the thing you want to print - or design it yourself - and boom, it’s sitting on your printer in a couple of hours. While I’m just taking files from the community and printing the .stl file, the skill ceiling is also very high once you add hardware to your projects (e.g. screws, ball bearings, Raspberry Pi). I’m going to continue to learn and I’m excited about where I can take this machine.

Some questions for the community:

1. If you have a 3D printer, how deep in the rabbit hole are you? Are you making your own CAD files?
2. What’s your favorite print? If you don’t own a printer, what’s a cool 3D print that stands out in your mind?
3. What’s a problem in your life where you think you could 3D print a solution?

I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter.

Let me clarify that this loss of love is not due to anyone's death. Perhaps just the same however, since they do not reciprocate your love and warmth anymore, for reasons completely unclear.

The case in point now is this: I'm 25M single and an alone child. I've spent most of my life searching for bondings that nurtured my emotional being. Finding a home for my emotions has been a major theme across different parts of my life. I was lucky enough to be bestowed with a cousin (20F) whom I could meet (at best twice a year, at worst once) and bond over the text otherwise, offering solace and comfort as if from a like-minded sibling. Whenever I needed a sink to pour my love, it was towards her. All was well until I met her yesterday, the meeting for this year (we live continents apart and we know these meetings are limited); I felt I'm distant, and I was invisible on a deeper level to her. Nothing we talked about was related to our well-being as we used to. It was all about the boys in her life, Instagram likes, and other such superficial things. It was as if she didn't know what I care about (I'm not even on IG).

I wasn't sure how to approach this. In general, even with a few friends, I've always had a hard time with an apparent loss of connection. How can you demand love from someone (Rhetorical; one shouldn't)? How should I let them know that the things were better and I want that? I mean nobody can force love. Should I accept (too hard to do) that those bondings have run their course?

Sorry for the emotional dump, and feel free to edit. Thanks for your thoughts.

So I continued to wet the bed way past 7 and I have no idea why.

different family members chalked it up to different reason:

1. I am lazy
2. I am a very deep sleeper
3. I have a very anxious personality
4. bladder issues

Amongst other things.

One thing I can see being a cause was that I was not raised in a peaceful household. It was a very violent household. not in the sense of physical violence like broken arms and such, more as in lots of yelling and screaming and things like that. My family really didn't know how to communicate well.

But I was not the only child raised in my household and I was the only one who wet the bed.

Anyways, different thing were tried, things to supposedly "fix" my bladder. shaming, etc. Growing up, my family had to always wake me up at around 4 or 5 am and take me to the bathroom, otherwise there was a good chance I'd wet the bed.

I personally was getting worried that it was a problem I'd have forever and it'd be an impediment to my social life (as in no sleepovers and etc (not that I had had friends at that age anyways)).

But I did start to notice that once I got into high school, it started happening less and less. Still did happen, but just wasn't as common. Then, I remember the last time it happened was when I was either in grade 10 or 11 but I am pretty sure grade 10.

Then that was it.

It just stopped on its own.

Weird thing is, I changed nothing about myself.

I'd still classify myself as lazy and a very deep sleeper and I still have an incredibly anxious personality.

The only thing that changed is that when I am asleep, and as my bladder is filling up, something in my bladder (or my brain) instead of just releasing, would instead block the urine until I wake up in pain and go to the bathroom. The change really caught my attention when I woke up with a really full bladder like 2-3 years ago and I remembered how a little over 10 years ago (I am in my 30s), no way my body would've reacted to it by holding it in involuntarily until I woke up.

I tried doing a bit of googling to figure out what parts of the body are involved in the process of holding in one's pee overnight to try and see what are the possible reasons for the change to occur so late in me to no avail.

I am forever curious what happened in my body to make that change happen so late but not sure I will ever know.

Just had a chat with friends about the possibility and how it would likely be introduced.

Paraphrased into the following;

2.99$/Month
OEM installs have a 2 year license
Upgrades are free for the first year (from 11 to the new)
Comes with Office 365 and AI functionality to soften the blow

What are your thoughts on this?

A couple months ago I made this post asking for nonfiction books to read. I read several recs from there, here are my reviews!

Kingbird Highway: The Story of a Natural Obsession That Got a Little Out of Hand - what a fun book! I read mostly spec fic and this felt a lot like an epic quest story. It was also interesting (and sad) to see the background effects of climate change with birds constantly moving farther northward. Recommended if you want some light reading and to get extremely excited about birds, vicariously

The Ascent of Money - A really interesting history text that also explains a lot of financial market concepts. The author is center-right and I disagree with some of his opinions on particular developments being good or bad, but there's a ton of information here and I think it's a great book to have better financial literacy, but I'd still categorize it as "satisfying curiosity" and not "everyone should read this."

The Perfectionists - A bit disappointing tbh, it started out strong but then it started being a bit esoteric in what it covered. I watched Longitude after it was mentioned here, and discovering that movie was the best part of this book so I recommend watching that and maybe not reading this.

Sleepwalkers: How Europe went to war in 1914 - My favorite recommendation from the post! It's very long and a bit dense, and there's no way I would've gotten through it if I hadn't been both reading a physical copy & listening to the audiobook at the same time. There are too many names to do just audiobook, but having both was a great experience. I wrote some notes about this to hopefully make your life easier if you read this too, and you should, I highly recommend it!!!

I also read a couple books recommended by HN in various threads:

• The War That Killed Achilles: The True Story of Homer's Iliad and the Trojan War - tbh I have no interest in reading The Iliad itself, but this is a fantastic secondary source and I'm glad to feel somewhat familiar with the text after reading it
• Achilles in Vietnam: Combat Trauma and the Undoing of Character - another secondary source about the Iliad, although this one is a bit more distant from the text. Enjoyed quite a bit & it's very interesting, but it's emotionally difficult to get through.
• Two Wheels Good: THe History and Mystery of the Bicycle - this was not fantastic and had maybe two chapters total that were actually the history of the bicycle, the rest was "random anecdotes from my life or vaguely-bicycle-related topics that I personally find interesting." Some sections were interesting, mostly I felt lied to by the title.
• The Trouble with Physics: The Rise of String Theory, the Fall of a Science and What Comes Next - I had read The Elegant Universe in high school, and this book is in some part a response to that one. I found The Trouble with Physics a weird compromise between not being too technical but still providing detail about the state of the field of physics, and it didn't work for me too well, but I was a math major and took several physics courses in undergrad so maybe that's just how it is to read a popular science book in a field you have some background in. I didn't necessarily want equations, but some actual math terms would've been nice instead of just saying "haha it has nice math properties." Anyway, if you're interested in the state of the field of modern physics it's maybe worth reading but also you could just watch this YT video instead which my friend linked to me after I told him I was reading this.
• Chip War: The Fight for the World's Most Critical Technology - this was the book that actually inspired me to make the post here, everyone should read this. Semiconductor manufacturing is one of the most important supply chains in the world today, and I didn't know anything about it prior to reading this book.

What have you been listening to this week? You don't need to do a 6000 word review if you don't want to, but please write something! If you've just picked up some music, please update on that as well, we'd love to see your hauls :)

Feel free to give recs or discuss anything about each others' listening habits.

You can make a chart if you use last.fm:

http://www.tapmusic.net/lastfm/

Remember that linking directly to your image will update with your future listening, make sure to reupload to somewhere like imgur if you'd like it to remain what you have at the time of posting.

Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like winamp, pfas and baking. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was bamboozled.

But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

I don't want to say I'm an alcoholic but I might be. Over the last several years, my drinking has increased from once or twice a week to daily, to the point where I'd start my day off in the weekend with a drink. I knew it wasn't good, but it was a habit I fell into.

Obviously I'm aware enough about it to do something. I've quit smoking cigarettes, so I at least understand the quitting process, but I also don't want to (and don't think I could) give up drinking forever like I did with quitting cigarettes.

My wife is also a drinker, but is much more moderated about it. Thing is, it meant that even if I didn't buy drinks for me, there's always been drinks in the house and so... I drank that. I've finally convinced her that for financial and dietary reasons it would be beneficial to us to stop buying drinks for at home. For my own self, I know that if I don't have a drink around I just won't drink.

This works great but, I find myself lost and listless now! It's a frustrating feeling that I remember well from when I was quitting cigarettes, and I know I just need to work through those moments and keep myself busy otherwise. With the nice weather, I've been biking a lot more and spending more time outside with my kids. At night is when it's toughest - those times after everyone else is asleep and before I go to bed.

I'm not really looking for advice or anything, I just want to share somewhere my experience so far, because it feels good to write about it and express my feelings. Maybe it'll help.

Also if anyone has a suggestion for something to replace beer, I'd appreciate it. I don't like fruity, or soft drinks. Currently I'm getting by with enormous amounts of sparkling water but sometimes I want some flavor, but most drinks that aren't beer are cloyingly sweet and disgusting.

In the last year I've made significant progress in my relationship with food. A massive part of it was simply cutting down calories and a little more exercise. And so far it's been pretty good. I'm down around 13kg(30lb), I'm fitting in a lot of my older cloths and issues like back pain and sleep apnea are getting back in line.

But for a while I've hit a plateau and it's feeling like a bit of a regression. Looks like the big blocker is my sugar consumption. I can stave off the craving for most of the day, but at 2.30pm on the dot I can't help but reach for chocolate, soda or an ice cream. And then I keep reaching for them till the end of the day. It's been getting worse lately and that slipping feeling really sucks.

I've tried cold turkey, fruits, alternatives, gum and a few other strategies but they all never stick.

I'm curious if anyone else has managed to make the cut and if there's any tips and tricks that helped keep you consistent. It's one thing to clear out the house, but the stuff seems to be at arms reach at all times. And there's always the weird blackout time between "I should not eat that" and "why the hell did I eat that".