• Activity
  • Votes
  • Comments
  • New
  • All activity
  • Showing only topics in ~life with the tag "advice". Back to normal view / Search all groups
    1. Should I go heat pump only?

      Hi all, I am in the middle of taking bids with my local HVAC companies and am looking for someone to nudge me in one direction or the other. For background, I bought my house in western Michigan,...

      Hi all,

      I am in the middle of taking bids with my local HVAC companies and am looking for someone to nudge me in one direction or the other. For background, I bought my house in western Michigan, right off the lake Michigan coast near Grand Rapids, last Fall. My home inspection made it clear the AC would need work and I haven't started to feel the need for it until recently. I called an HVAC company out and when they said the unit was 25+ years old, I just told them to forget about even fixing it because it would be at least 10% of the cost of a new unit and still way less efficient.

      So.

      My natural gas furnace is also ~20 years old and the first HVAC guy said that if it broke down, it likely wouldn't pass a safety inspection. They said something about how the coils being dirty or positioned someway or something, I can't really recall 100% what the issue would be but the gist that I got was that when it breaks down, whether it be 1 year, 2 years, or 5 years, it won't be worth fixing or it will be unfixable. A new AC would be ~$6500 and a new furnace would be ~$7000.

      So I started up the conversation towards installing a heat pump unit in instead of a standard AC unit. My initial thinking is that when the furnace goes, I have the back up ready to go instead. Now a heat pump unit is going to cost me around $2000 more. I don't think my plan will be to ever install a replacement furnace. Depending on what the solar assessment says, evaluating both ground mounted and roof mounted solar, will tell me how worth it is to go that route and have discounted or free heating and cooling.

      Where the calculus gets tricky for me is there is the Inflation Reduction Act which will give me a $2000 tax credit for a heat pump. But that will come with buying a more expensive, and efficient unit, and I believe I will also have to completely get rid of the furnace I currently have since the total home system has to meet the efficiency standard. In addition, last month I replaced my fuse box with a 200 amp panel and if I meet the requirements to get the $2000 tax credit, I would also get $600 tax credit for the panel since I can tie them together.

      All in all, I am looking at getting a more efficient unit for roughly the same price as the less efficient unit but without the natural gas furnace as either main heating, or back up heating. My hesitation is that natural gas is so cheap that it doesn't make sense financially to go heat pump only unless I have renewable energy to pair with it. But maybe I am just overthinking it? And maybe I have gotten something wrong in my calculations?

      Any advice or clarifications would be greatly appreciated. I have one more quote coming this Thursday and I hope to make a decision by Friday to get the work started

      31 votes
    2. Career advice: specializing in niche tech stack vs. finishing first degree

      Hello all, was inspired to fish for responses after seeing another user request resume feedback. Apologies if the background is on the longer side. TLDR: Dropped out 10 years ago; have only a high...

      Hello all, was inspired to fish for responses after seeing another user request resume feedback. Apologies if the background is on the longer side.

      TLDR: Dropped out 10 years ago; have only a high school degree and university transfer credits. Conflicted between finishing my degree online while working full time, vs. specializing in a niche tech stack (Salesforce) via current employment. Looking for any input because I'm prone to decision paralysis.

      Background I'm in a really weird place currently in terms of long term career track. I dropped out of college for computer science a decade ago. The school was a private for-profit (yikes) and I couldn't transfer any credits out. Either way, I was aimless, so I enrolled at a local community college with the intent of transferring to a state 4-year, earn my bachelor's, and figure things out from there. A connection at the community college helped me find full-time employment in a help desk role, so I paused my studies.

      That help desk role turned into a weird application analyst/developer position that involved configuring applications using a low code platform. I taught myself Python and some super basic React while there, and my crowning achievement was making a hideous set of Python scripts that ended up replacing an automation program that the company couldn't get working anyways. When my boss at that job moved to a new company, he contacted me in the next year to fill a systems analyst position, which in practice was learning Salesforce administration and whatever else third party tech tools the company decides to adopt for projects. I've been here for 1.5 years now. The pay is not amazing for HCOL, but I'm still living with family and the work is fully remote so I'm not complaining.

      The best part, actually, is that there's a lot of room for career growth with actual on the job experience... if I teach myself Salesforce development. There's a few other people on my team who all stumbled into Salesforce admin tasks like myself, but none have a CS background so I've already taken on and delivered on some tasks that would previously have gone to a consultant.

      I don't know how many folks here work with Salesforce development, but my research tells me that it's a locked ecosystem, incredibly flooded on the entry level by people holding certificates from Salesforce, and a different enough beast from traditional software engineering that X years as a Salesforce developer won't exactly translate to X years of experience when trying to pivot to a software dev role. I already had a difficult time getting any responses back when I tried to apply to junior software dev roles during the pandemic - which could be my resume, but I'm sure the lack of a degree and primary work experience being on low code platforms were not helpful. Either way, the thought of relying on Salesforce for breadwinning is... not something I am "above" by any means, but does trigger a bit of anxiety for the future.

      The second option would be to go through some reputable online degree program like WGU or CSU Monterey Bay's CS Online. I've actually been slowly earning credits to transfer to the latter, but I've never been a great self-paced learner. I read that these programs are perfect for people working full time, but I absolutely do not fit the bill for the type of student who can blitz through WGU's program in a year. So both would take me maybe two years to complete if I start in 2025, which is something to the tune of $15-20k USD. I can afford this, but it's not exactly a drop in the bucket either. Dropping work to attend in-person at lower costs at a local university unfortunately is not an option.

      If I were driven and disciplined enough, I could do both - learning SF dev on my own time and applying it to work, while also earning my degree - but I'll be honest and say that's just a recipe for disaster. I know me; if I had even a fraction of the discipline required to make that work, I'd have upskilled out of here years back when pandemic hiring at tech companies were at an all time high. That train has come and gone, though.

      18 votes
    3. How to find purpose in life?

      I often think about the purpose and/or meaning of life and I've been struggling to work through these thoughts lately. As I teen I've had these thoughts often, but after experiencing my first...

      I often think about the purpose and/or meaning of life and I've been struggling to work through these thoughts lately. As I teen I've had these thoughts often, but after experiencing my first manic episode (that led to psychosis) back in August 2022, the question of "What's the point?" pops into my head quite frequently.

      Alongside this I've been struggling to come to terms with my new diagnosis of 'Bipolar Type I with psychotic features' as I've already been diagnosed with ADHD back in 2017 and I realize that both of these are life-long diagnoses. I know I just have to learn how to live with them, but that's been a tough pill to swallow.

      I should mention that I'm not suicidal or anything, but rather I feel hollow and numb inside as I am very unfulfilled with life. Some days are okay and I'm still functioning and taking care of myself (so it's not like a full-blown depression), but as I mentioned before, I just don't see the point in all of this and don't find many things to be worthwhile or enjoyable anymore.

      Basically I feel like a shell of my former self after my episode and have found much difficulty in enjoying the things I liked before from hobbies, to music and even food (I was a highly food-driven person). It's definitely much better than it was immediately after my episode, but it's as though life has been sucked out of me and I'm just going through the motions of living because it's what I'm supposed to do. I know recovery takes time, but it's been nearly 2 years since my episode and I thought this feeling would go away by now...

      (I've also been seeing a counselor and OT and am doing things such as CBT and ACT which helped a bit, but not enough as I am here asking questions on an online forum seeking help).

      If you have any advice on how to work through this it would be appreciated.


      EDIT (12/6/24): I wanted to say thank you to all the responses and advice given. I may not have replied to everyone, but just know that I have been reading the comments and I do appreciate them :)

      46 votes
    4. Plumbing questions

      New house owner here, a couple of weird plumbing things I'm noticing and not sure how big of a concern they are. All of these are very sporadic. Possibly relevant things to note, I live in the US,...

      New house owner here, a couple of weird plumbing things I'm noticing and not sure how big of a concern they are. All of these are very sporadic.

      Possibly relevant things to note, I live in the US, we do not have a basement, do have a crawlspace, are connected to the town sewer lines, have lived in the house for about 2 weeks and it was vacant for a month prior to us moving in (with occasional visits and contractors.)

      1. A couple of times, but only a couple, the bathroom sinks have made a sound when flushing the toilet. Maybe once this happened with the kitchen sink but I couldn't be sure. Not sure if this is something I should be trouble shooting or I'm overthinking it.

      2. We've had occasional sewer gas odors. I've run water down the second bathroom's drains just in case it was due to those being unused, but I can't tell if that fixed it because it's inconsistent. Anything else I can/should do?

      3. The main suite shower is a circular rain style shower head. Occasionally, hours or even a day after using it, it'll just run water, the way you'd expect it to drain out of the shower head after turning off the shower. The internet suggested this could be just something where the water is held in the shower head until air/water pressure shifts and it can escape. It's also possible that this needs a vinegar bath to clean up some hard water scaling. Am I on the right track?

      4. One of my toilets keeps running/not running when the float gets stuck. I've fixed that before, though the last time I did it, it was a rubber float on a stick and this is some plastic contraption. (I am discovering home repair makes me feel like a 72 year old grumpy old man. ) Pretty sure I can clean it and see if that fixes it, adjust the screw on it, and replace it if needed. But any tips there besides a YouTube video or two?

      Never owned a house before so any advice is worthwhile.

      5 votes
    5. Toilet/plumbing upgrades

      Not sure if this is a "home improvement" topic, but I didn't see anywhere else relevant this would fit so I am going to drop it here. I've lived in the same place for around 12 years now. Before I...

      Not sure if this is a "home improvement" topic, but I didn't see anywhere else relevant this would fit so I am going to drop it here.

      I've lived in the same place for around 12 years now. Before I moved in, the place was owned by one other person for around 10 years. The place is probably ~20 years old. I have two toilets in the house. About 5 years after I moved in, the flushing mechanisms on one of the toilets stopped working and I inspected it and it looked like the bobber/float switch was busted to the point where when it got to max height, the water flow wouldn't shut off.

      I pulled up a couple articles on the internet and it seemed like the parts were pretty straight forward to replace. So I went to Lowes, got the replacement parts needed and a few hours later, toilet was fixed. No big deal. About a year later the other toilet started acting up in the same manner so I just did the same thing. Both toilets had the original parts in them. They were all metal parts. The replacement parts were a brand called "FluidMaster" and I didn't really think much of it at the time. The replacement parts were almost entirely plastic.

      So fast forward to today, and I have replaced the innards of the toilets on a fairly routine basis. It seems like every 18 months or so, I am having to replace the innards of the toilets because the float switch starts to fail. I came home from a day vacation on Saturday evening to find that one of the toilets was running and for god knows how long. I open the lid and sure enough, bobber is at the top, but the float switch hadn't disabled the water flow so the toilet just keeps running. I turned off the water to it and made a note that I'll have to go back to Lowes and pick up more parts. This will be the fourth or fifth replacement I've had to do on it.

      What's going on here? Why are these float switches in these kits breaking so frequently? Does anyone else have this problem? Am I just buying the wrong parts continuously? Is there a better set of parts that I can buy to correct this issue?

      9 votes
    6. Mini split confusion (efficiency and sizing)

      I'm right on the edge of buying a mini split for our shop space and I'm having a bout of indecisiveness. To preface, we are located in south/central Texas. The shop is a standalone structure, is...

      I'm right on the edge of buying a mini split for our shop space and I'm having a bout of indecisiveness.

      To preface, we are located in south/central Texas. The shop is a standalone structure, is fairly well insulated but has a 2-car garage door and a single-pane window, so it isn't ideal. It's 625sqft with 9 foot ceilings. We have various tools that will be in use but nothing that creates excessive heat.

      We are quite limited in funds so I'm not going with an HVAC company, nor am I going with a mr cool or other diy friendly unit due to cost. I'm capable to do the install myself, I'm not overly concerned about that.

      I was originally looking at the 18k (1.5ton) senville leto. I ran various calculators and they all suggested this size would be enough up to 1000sqft or so. However, since I have 9 ft ceilings and I live in a hot climate and I have the big door and crappy window, the calculations pushed my 625sqft up to around 900 or so equivalent sqft in some cases and in others as high as 1200.

      Due to my circumstances, I think I've convinced myself to move up to the 24k unit instead. I don't think it's too over provisioned for my specific scenario but I would like to hear your thoughts on how off the mark I am here.

      Apart from size, there's also the question of efficiency. The other model I was looking at is the Aura by senville, and the difference is a higher seer2 rating and energy star certification.

      Now, doing rough math, the difference in efficiency would be paid off by the savings of the more efficient unit in something like 8 or 9 years based on projected usage and my energy costs. I'm a pessimistic person and don't expect this unit to last 8-10 years. This is a cheap way to get the space comfortable to work in so that my side business can progress, and I would think if it's still going in that amount of time, I'll be able to afford a nicer unit by then.

      However, after saying all that, I do notice that the capabilities of the Aura unit are greater. It is advertised to work in -20f weather while the leto works in as low as 5f.

      Now, being in Texas, my primary concern is cooling, not heating, but no where can I find if the Aura system is more capable in hotter weather like it is in colder weather. This is slightly concerning because it seems most people use these primarily as heat sources and secondarily as cooling sources, and my situation is reversed.

      Does anyone have any input as to whether the higher efficiency system will make a noticable difference in cooling performance when it's 110f outside?

      Thanks for weathering my wall of text.

      14 votes
    7. Do you know a lot of weird people to talk about the latest weirdest things you've read?

      Recently, I went to a meetup for a blog I follow. I was expecting and (in part) hoping for it to be really strange. Similarly to this post "Developers Aren't Nerds", I think a part of me held the...

      Recently, I went to a meetup for a blog I follow. I was expecting and (in part) hoping for it to be really strange. Similarly to this post "Developers Aren't Nerds", I think a part of me held the expectation that I really would become an adult who sat around with other people who read something intellectually stimulating and joyfully kind of debated it amongst ourselves. Sort of like being on Tildes or any good forum. And being around these people and the environment was fun-- it was mostly casual, but when it wasn't, I felt challenged and like I was talking about things I cared about. And above all, unlike being online, it still felt human-- there wasn't that weird anxiety of saying something and getting piled on.

      I'm blessed to have a pretty good life, which includes (now) a fairly diverse and broad social life I worked to grow. I believe there is emotional support too (though I have a smaller circle for that). But it feels like we spend more time talking about (their) travel, music festivals, clubbing, whatever. And I know part of the issue is that I don't "get" it (I am an introvert, I like small groups), or I did enough of those experiences and feel sated for the time. But man, would I like to be a little weird and just randomly talk about the random shit my head puts together after reading. (Today, it was global fertility rate projections, sperm counts, IVF. Other times it was blockchain and other architectures I was learning about. Overall, things that are difficult to bring up randomly.)

      Do people have that outlet offline? Where did you find it?

      16 votes
    8. How to deal with (apparent) loss of love?

      I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter. Let me clarify that this loss of love...

      I'm not sure if this is the place to discuss, but as a lurker in this community of sensible folks, I'd love reading your stories and opinions on this matter.

      Let me clarify that this loss of love is not due to anyone's death. Perhaps just the same however, since they do not reciprocate your love and warmth anymore, for reasons completely unclear.

      The case in point now is this: I'm 25M single and an alone child. I've spent most of my life searching for bondings that nurtured my emotional being. Finding a home for my emotions has been a major theme across different parts of my life. I was lucky enough to be bestowed with a cousin (20F) whom I could meet (at best twice a year, at worst once) and bond over the text otherwise, offering solace and comfort as if from a like-minded sibling. Whenever I needed a sink to pour my love, it was towards her. All was well until I met her yesterday, the meeting for this year (we live continents apart and we know these meetings are limited); I felt I'm distant, and I was invisible on a deeper level to her. Nothing we talked about was related to our well-being as we used to. It was all about the boys in her life, Instagram likes, and other such superficial things. It was as if she didn't know what I care about (I'm not even on IG).

      I wasn't sure how to approach this. In general, even with a few friends, I've always had a hard time with an apparent loss of connection. How can you demand love from someone (Rhetorical; one shouldn't)? How should I let them know that the things were better and I want that? I mean nobody can force love. Should I accept (too hard to do) that those bondings have run their course?

      Sorry for the emotional dump, and feel free to edit. Thanks for your thoughts.

      17 votes
    9. What kinds of part time jobs did you do when you first entered the job market?

      On my own after cutting financial ties with my parents, and looking to try different kinds of work while I wait out a bad tech market. Besides uber, what are some interesting ways to work part...

      On my own after cutting financial ties with my parents, and looking to try different kinds of work while I wait out a bad tech market. Besides uber, what are some interesting ways to work part time in SF? I’ve been thinking about enlisting in the army, but I think there’s probably better ideas.

      About me: Recent CS grad, currently doing part-time pastry.

      Edit: Thanks so much for the great ideas! I think I’ll try looking into FOH, a couple gyms, and try a temp agency as a backup.

      21 votes
    10. I'm at a loss on what to do about my backyard grass situation

      My backyard has become a muddy mess and it's creating some downstream effects, such as me spending WAY too much time vacuuming and mopping (3 dogs), and not being able to do anything meaningful in...

      My backyard has become a muddy mess and it's creating some downstream effects, such as me spending WAY too much time vacuuming and mopping (3 dogs), and not being able to do anything meaningful in the backyard. Here are some details:

      • I'm right on the edge of USDA zones 9a and 9b -- the map shows that my house is specifically in 9a, but one block south of me is 9b
      • The grass in the backyard was mostly St. Augustine when I bought the house. For a number of reasons (some really harsh winters and summers, three dogs trampling the grass, etc.), the St. Augustine is entirely gone
      • Last fall, as a stop-gap, I put down some weed killer to control the weeds and seeded the entire backyard with winter rye. It grew amazingly well and I had a lush, verdant backyard for one season.
      • This spring, my plan was to grow bermuda grass. My thinking was that it would be able to withstand the summers but could also handle the dog traffic a bit better. So, I did some pre-emergent, scalped the winter rye, raked up most of the detritus, got the ground really wet and muddy, and laid down some bermuda seed + fertilizer
      • Now, almost a month later, I haven't seen a single bit of growth. The pre-emergent has done a pretty good job of keeping the weeds out and some winter rye is still growing here and there, but other than that, it's just... mud.

      So, what are my options, especially this late in the season? Should I just throw in the towel and sod it with St. Augustine again? Did I do something wrong with the bermuda? Do I need to make it through a muddy summer and reconsider my options going into the fall?

      31 votes
    11. An equitable solution to a problem at work regarding sick leave and staffing?

      Please bear with me as I'm not terribly sure if this is the right place for this, if I'm phrasing it right, or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. I work at a childcare center - a private...

      Please bear with me as I'm not terribly sure if this is the right place for this, if I'm phrasing it right, or if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill.


      I work at a childcare center - a private school marketed as "the best in the area". By most metrics, we are exactly that. I've worked here for nearly 15 years in a variety of roles, namely as a prek teacher for over half of that time. I have a good relationship with my directors and the schools owners, despite some issues in the past (I'm eager to champion more rights and privileges for employees).

      This week was the sickest I have been in years, and it was the same for several other staffers as well. We couldn't call in, however, because none of us had fevers, vomiting, or diarrhea (the "big three" for what's acceptable to call in for). We all had flu-like symptoms, though those of us who went to the doctor tested negative for anything. Dozens of students had been getting ill with STREP, Influenza A/B, and Fifths in the weeks prior. It just took its time in reaching the staff!

      I co-teach in my class and my co-teacher and I both lost our voices for days. Others had full-body aches, tremendous coughing fits, extreme lethargy... It was terrible. However, almost none of us got the time off that we needed to recover. Why? Staffing. The owners/directors don't want to close a room due to illness, even if both teachers in the room are horrendously sick. I spent days with the kids, barely able to talk or move, just trying to get through the day. My coworkers were the same.

      Does that seem right?

      The directors/owners essentially picked those who were deemed "sickest" to take a day off. While in the moment I understand that decision, it doesn't seem like a terribly good way to handle it either. I want to bring up my grievances about this with the owners (I already have with the directors, they don't disagree with me but "that's just the way it is") but I also know that showing up with a problem and no solution won't go over well. I also know they don't want to close a classroom at all costs, which is my preferred solution. The last time one was closed was when 5/6 teachers in another room had COVID simultaneously and we were mandated to close the room.

      Anyone have any thoughts? Even if it's to show me a side I may not be considering here? Thank you for your insight.

      22 votes
    12. What do I do if I don't have any clothes?

      No, I don't just mean "I don't really like my clothes" or "my clothes aren't universal enough" or whatever. I literally have almost no clothes: maybe like 5 T-Shirts in total, 2 pairs of jeans,...

      No, I don't just mean "I don't really like my clothes" or "my clothes aren't universal enough" or whatever. I literally have almost no clothes: maybe like 5 T-Shirts in total, 2 pairs of jeans, some socks and underwear. The issue is not just with me disliking my clothes - the issue is that half of the time I'll wake up and find out that I have zero clean clothes to wear.

      Luckily, this is not a financial issue, and I can afford to get clothes. However, I have absolutely no idea where to start. Most of the information online exists with the assumption that you already have some sort of a wardrobe that you want to expand. I tried just going to a mall and going into every clothing store, but I end up not liking most of the stuff there and only buying like a single shirt. I know that that's how most people buy clothes, but again, those people usually already have enough clothing, so buying a single shirt is fine for them.

      At this point, even just thinking about any clothing-related activities immediately trigger severe anxiety and dread in me. I feel very lost and don't know what to do.

      Can anyone please suggest what to do in a situation like this?


      Edit: I live in Russia, so well known brands aren't that easy to buy

      34 votes
    13. How do you organize all your electronic gadgets/accessories?

      I'm in the process of moving apartments, and I'm realizing I don't have an elegant solution to all of the tech gadgets/accessories/junk my hoarding tendencies refuse to let go of. By electronic...

      I'm in the process of moving apartments, and I'm realizing I don't have an elegant solution to all of the tech gadgets/accessories/junk my hoarding tendencies refuse to let go of.

      By electronic accessories I mean all the cables, flash drives, SD cards, dongles, headphones, power bricks, etc. that have I've gathered over the years. There are some larger items like musical instrument cables, wireless speakers, an computer mouse, even an old PS3 I don't really know what to do with. While most don't get used frequently, there have definitely been times where one of these items comes in clutch.

      I'm not opposed to getting dedicated furniture like an under-desk cabinet, although I would want to make sure the space is used efficiently, and that it can be sturdy enough to be multipurpose (e.g. my work office cabinets have a cushion that can be used for sitting on top of). I'm in NYC so space is a premium and there's a low likelihood that I'll have extra space in existing drawers/closets, so I'd prefer a standalone solution.

      Hoping there might be some clever solutions/suggestions Tilerinos find handy, even if it's accepting that a Marie Kondo-style purge of unused electronics is necessary.

      16 votes